Naruto Uzumaki: The Orange Flash
by Breath of the Wiz
Summary: Puberty's struck again, and its latest victim is Naruto Uzumaki. He returns, eager to fulfill his promise to Sakura, but that's not his primary concern anymore. He's hot now, too hot... Seriously, it's actually a problem. It's a free for all, and absolutely NOBODY is willing to share. There can be only one... The original "Anti-Harerm" Naru/Saku/Hina/Ino/Anko/OC/FemGaara/Nabi
1. Chapter 1: An Early Christmas

AN: This is to be my personal take on Shippuden. In this version, Naruto's relationship with Haku (who is female in this story, I don't do yaoi) is a large part of what drives him toward the path of Hokage. Without further adieu...

_***Update For Newcomers 8/8/15* **This story was originally a pure comedy fic. If you read on, you'll notice a bit of a tone shift around chapter 12 as things become a tad more dramatic. I'm trying to keep everyone in character as much as possible, so this means that none of the female characters are willing to share Naruto. This tiny change to the "harem" formula is the reason this story is doing so well, since most of them flat out die before the chapter 30 mark due to the lack of conflict and tension. Because none of the girls want to share, there's gonna be some serious infighting and sabotage when it comes to acquiring Naruto's affections. So, in closing, if you're looking for a bunch of fluffy sm00t where Naruto goes around fucking everything with a vagina, **this is not that story**. Hopefully this clears up any questions you have about the format, and if you have any questions concerning the story, put them down in reviews so I can reply accordingly/keep track of them better (my PM inbox is a clusterfuck)._

* * *

The sun was high in the sky as two figures broke the horizon of Konoha. One of them was instantly recognizable via his wild mane of stark white hair, the Sannin Jiraiya. The other… not so much. He stood at exactly 5'9", a head shorter than the sannin, while the sunlight highlighted his most distinguishing feature, a spiky blond mane of hair, done similarly in style to the sannin, ponytail and all.

He wore simple, yet distinctive clothing, his long-sleeved shirt was a distinct shade of orange, while his pants were the standard navy color. He wore black ninja sandals with matching orange ankle wraps, and he also wore some light body armor on his shoulders, black in color.

Naruto was back, Naruto was finally home. The teen was radiating a volatile happiness that would brighten even the most hardened cynic's day, if it weren't so sunny out, one would swear he was glowing.

Jiraiya peered down at his apprentice and chuckled, he looked like a young child on christmas morning. It was understandable of course, seeing as there were several complications during their two and a half years away from Konoha, one of which forced them to keep their distance from populated areas.

Jiraiya's curiosity concerning Naruto's development wasn't without its selfish motivations however. The boy's social skills had deteriorated somewhat (and that's saying something), however, he'd grown quite a bit during the last 10 or so months of the trip.

Naruto was starting to look even more like his father, who was unitentionally a certified lady-killer. What's worse, Jiraiya could tell that between Minato's features, and Kushina's disposition, Naruto had gotten the best of both of his parents.

The sannin gave the skies a lecherous grin and thumbed his new note-book, visibly chomping at the bit to document Naruto's first day back since he'd changed. He noticed that Naruto was flipping a whetstone into the air and occaisionally tapping it against the hilt of his sword.

"Gaki."

"What's up?"

Jiraiya pointed toward Naruto's hip.

"You sure you don't want to get that thing fixed? It's always been a fancy blade, I'd think you would be more invested in repairing it."

Naruto drew the distinctive weapon, Its' blade was orange, and the cross guard appeared to be a fox head, the blade sprouting from the roaring mouth. The most interesting detail concerning this ninjato was the fact that it's handle was about twice as long as as most katana even.

Naruto observed it for a moment and eventually smiled before shaking his head.

"Nah. I prefer the blade to be shorter, and besides, it's a reminder... keeps things in perspective, ya know? I can't forget why I asked you to take me with you."

Jiraiya breifly pondered the parallels between both himself and Orochimaru, as well as Naruto and Sasuke, however, the Sannin's train of thought was summarily interrupted by the sound of the blonde's voice.

"Oi, Ero Sannin."

"What is it?"

"... You go on ahead to Baa-Chan's office. I'll catch up with you all later."

"She's gonna rip my arms off and beat you with them if you're late. You know, we _were_ supposed to be back six months ago."

"Hey, _that_ was a credible lead on Sasuke's location 'ttebayo! Besides, all you did was blow your cash at that whore house the whole damn time!"

Jiraiya's nose began to trickle a bit of blood. "Money well spent I might add..."

The young man turned toward Jiraiya, disgusted. "You're just as lame as the harlots that work there... We would have been back ages ago if you'd actually helped!"

Jiraiya glared at the young man before him. "Harlots? That's kinda harsh for you ain't it?"

Naruto shrugged. "Yeah, maybe, but I have a low opinion of _anyone_ who screws up my training. You left me out in the woods to train by myself four times in one week while we were in that cesspit!"

Jiraiya closed his eyes and placed his hand on his chin, he then gave Naruto a stupid grin. "... I'll have you know that Miko-chan was a very elegant woman that saw me for the great man that I am! I'd say my time was well spent!"

Naruto rolled his eyes. "Yea sure! Just as long as you kept those bills flowing! You could buy our entire army brand new gear for the cash you wasted on her."

The Sannin flicked Naruto on the back of the head, causing the teen to stumble forward. "Just run your errand, Naruto."

Jiraiya exhaled in annoyance and used a shunshin to go to Tsunade's office.

Naruto rubbed the spot where he was flicked. "That's a first, he called me by name."

Naruto cracked his neck and jogged over the hill to the main gate, his toothy smile making itself known when he saw who was guarding it. Izumo was currently trying to wake Kotetsu from a cat nap. Naruto jogged up to the two chuunin. "Hey! Do you guys remember me?"

Izumo turned to Naruto and scratched his head. "I don't think we've met sir."

Naruto's smile switched to disappointment. "The chuunin exams ring any bells?"

Kotetsu suddenly snapped awake and looked directly at Naruto. "Yea, you're that orange kid who beat Neji Hyuga! … Whoa... Puberty hit you like a train." Izumo whirled around and stared at Naruto, who stared back.

Izumo stared, slack-jawed at the blonde ninja. "Naruto? Naruto Uzumaki?"

The jinchuuriki gave a thumbs up and smirked. "In the flesh 'ttebayo!"

Kotetsu pulled his forehead protector over his eyes and leaned back against the tree. "I forgot how annoying that catch phrase of yours was. -yawn- Tsunade-sama said to go see her as soon as you got back."

Kotetsu pulled out a clipboard and checked Naruto in, he motioned for the boy to walk through the gates before kicking back and exhaling.

Izumo looked at his friend with an exasperated expression and retorted. "Oh, so now you actually do your job, what's it take for you to-… DID YOU GO TO SLEEP AGAIN ALREADY?!"

Naruto stared in amusement at Izumo's attempts to awaken Kotetsu. Approaching boredom, Naruto absentmindedly dug in his ear and went on his way through the checkpoint, as he stepped through the gates, he was greeted by a familiar sight. It was the Gate Plaza, the place that would greet him and say it's farewell every time he passed through those giant red doors. He looked at the statue of the Shodaime Hokage on the top of the fountain and smiled nostalgically at it, however, something that he _hadn't _seen before caught his eye.

Off in the distance, he could see a fifth face on the Hokage's monument. Naruto grinned and his chest puffed out, knowing that he himself was instrumental in getting her to return to Konoha. Naruto tightened his hairband and walked around the fountain, that errand wouldn't run itself after all.

As Naruto walked through the streets, visibly deep in thought, he failed to notice the attention he was garnering from the general populace.

"He looks like the…"

"Is that the demon brat?"

"I though the Yondaime was dead!"

"Oh my god. That guy is so hot!"

Naruto's ears twitched at that last one and he stopped and looked around. Unable to find this "hot guy", Naruto awkwardly walked through the awestruck boulevard, everything having paused to gawk at him. Man or woman, young and old, the hundreds of people in the dirt roads of Konoha were staring, some out of lust, others out of fear, and even nostalgia. Naruto nervously chuckled and scratched the back of his head; he gave a smile and jumped to the nearest rooftop to go run his errand, not that it helped any. Everybody was rubbernecking, trying to catch a glimpse of Naruto as he ran across the rooftops, unintentionally invoking the image of the late Yondaime Hokage.

* * *

Ino was bored, no, _'bored' _is an understatment; on this particular day, watching paint dry would look like the fucking 3rd Shinobi World War. Inoichi had forced her to run the flower shop for the day since he was on a mission, and Ino's mother, well, she was "out", whatever that meant. Having sat there for five hours, without a single customer in sight, Ino was considering bashing in her skull in with a flowerpot. Well, she would've, but the bell on the door jingled as an unseen customer walked in. Ino straightened up as the footsteps drew near the shelf blocking the register.

Ino straightened her apron and wiped the look of disgust off her face.

"Welcome to Yamanaka Arrangements, are you looking for anything in particu-… _oh my god_."

The flowerpot shattered on the floor.

Naruto looked at the shattered pot and bashfully scratched the back of his head. "Uh… Hey Ino, It's nice to see you again. Look, I know we're not exactly friends or anything, but I really need your help."

Ino didn't hear a word that Naruto had said.

In Ino's simplest terms, this person was _gorgeous, _even if she was firmly opposed to using that adjective to describe a man, it was the only word that fit. No getting around it. Stunning enough to leave Ino Yamanaka, the village ice-queen, tongue-tied like a groupie. Ino's mind was drifting toward impure fantasies involving this orange-clad prettyboy… orange… whisker marks? …

Ino gasped. "NARUTO?!"

Naruto cocked his head to the side and appeared confused.

"I mean, I know I've gotten taller... I haven't changed _that_ much have I?"

Ino scrambled to sweep the shattered pot off the floor. "Uhm. Uh… anyway! Was there something you needed me for, Naruto?"

Naruto perked up a bit. "Oh yeah! I need some flowers for someone!"

Ino put a hand on her hip and looked at Naruto inquisitively. "What's she like?"

Naruto's smile slowly disappeared, causing Ino to recoil slightly.

* * *

_Naruto ran up the tree for the umpteenth time, only to land firmly on his ass... again. "Dammit! Why's this so much easier for everyone else?" Naruto sprinted toward the tree and punched it, his fist embedded itself firmly in the bark, and the whole tree shuddered as countless fruits Naruto had never seen before all began to fall to the ground. He looked up to further examine the tree he was training on, but apparently that wasn't in the cards for him, because he was promptly knocked out by a yellow, star-shaped fruit that landed on his face._

_The black abyss slowly disappated and Naruto could feel himself returning to conciousness after what only felt like seconds._

_The genin's mind began to ponder his predicament. 'Why am i so comfortable? Last thing I remember is getting hit in the face by one of those damn fruits.' _

_Naruto's eyes slowly opened to one of the most beautiful faces he'd ever seen, second to Sakura of course. His head was propped up on her knees and he could feel her treating the bruises and cuts on his face and body._

_"You're awake. I'm glad."_

_Naruto smiled, or what would pass for a smile, given the amount of pain he was in. He tried to sit up, but the beautiful girl stopped him._

_"Don't move yet, I'm almost done."_

_Naruto didn't complain and stared up at her face as she treated his cuts and bruises. She noticed his gaze and smiled down at him._

_"Might I ask your name?"_

_"Naruto... Naruto Uzumaki."_

_"Uzumaki? I've heard of that clan before. What's it like?"_

_"Actually, I never knew there was a clan. I'm an orphan as far as I know."_

_"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that... I'm an orphan as well."_

_"Really huh? What's your name, Miss? I gotta call you something."_

_"... It's Haku."_

* * *

Naruto's blank expression gave Ino the chills, his voice was weak, uncharacteristically so for the energetic ninja.

"She was gentle, and kind... Without her, I wouldn't be where I am today." Naruto looked toward the ceiling nostalgically, Ino could have sworn his eyes went watery for a second. She put two and two together and pointed toward a bouquet of lavender and black flowers that are commonly put on the graves of loved ones.

Ino nodded and replied in a sympathetic tone. "I'd ask more, but I don't want to stir up any bad memories. I'd suggest those over there, that'll be 500 ryo, Naruto."

Naruto walked over and inspected the flowers, they were lovely, but they seemed so dark and gloomy with the black petals. "You sure Ino? The price tag says 1000."

Ino leaned over the cash register. "Consider it a favor toward us moving forward. I hope to become closer acquainted with you later on!"

"Ya know, you're alright, Ino." Naruto turned and started to jog out the door, he chirped out his goodbye as he left. "Thanks, I'll see you around!"

Naruto flipped the money to Ino and walked out the door. She smirked at him and chuckled while she watched him leave.

"Naruto Uzumaki... Looks like christmas came early this year..."

* * *

Short'n sweet.

~ Breath of the Wiz


	2. Chapter 2: Flowers For A Friend

AN: As of right now, I'm not sure who exactly is supposed to be part of the harem. As of right now, the shoe-ins are Sakura, Hinata, and Ino. I don't want to be cliché however (there's enough of that on this site already.) I'm considering adding in Shion from the first shippuden movie in. Also, I'll probably write an original character for the harem at some point, for now, let's get this chapter rolling.

* * *

Naruto walked with his bouquet through the streets of Konoha, disgusted glares and lustful stares aside, he felt isolated, alone. Sure, he had friends, people to protect, but even then, he had no one that could love him on a deeper level. Naruto arrived at the door to his apartment building; he took the elevator to the top floor, and walked down the grimy old hallway. There it was. He stared at his door for a few seconds before funneling some of his chakra into the doorknob. The door opened and Naruto stepped in, it was the polar opposite of the hallways outside. It was immaculate.

Before he left, Ero Sannin forced Naruto to clean the place 'till it was completely spotless. In retrospect, Naruto was thankful for it, coming home to a mess after a long absence wasn't exactly pleasing. As he walked into his bedroom, he set the bouquet on his bed and pumped chakra into one of the seals on his sleeve. Out poofed a yellow and black three pronged kunai that Jiraiya gave him months earlier. Naruto stuck it in the floor in front of his bed and picked up his bouquet.

Bending down on one knee, he put his finger through the ring and disappeared in a yellow flash.

He reappeared in a familiar fishing village. Naruto stood on the hill overlooking the bridge so aptly named after him, a warm gust of wind had been waiting to greet the young shinobi. Naruto smiled weakly at the bridge, as it brought bittersweet memories to his mind. He turned around, and there they were, the graves of Haku and Zabuza. Naruto sauntered over to Haku's marker and replaced the withered flowers with the new ones Ino gave him.

"Hey Haku-chan. I finally finished my training trip with Ero Sannin. I'm surprised he took it so seriously at the end, but the first year was just what you'd expect. I'd stay and talk, but I only have 20 minutes 'till Baa-chan hunts me down and kicks my ass. I'll be back later, love you."

With that, Naruto walked over to the knife embedded in the ground and placed his finger through the loop and concentrated. In his minds eye, he could feel the other knife off in the distance, pulling at his soul, and in a yellow flash, Naruto was back in his apartment. The Uzumaki mused to himself, thoroughly impressed.

"I still can't believe the Yondaime could use this technique in the middle of a fight." Naruto removed his finger from the loop and stripped off his rather musty clothes. He took a short shower and and walked over to his closet and opened it… but he hadn't bought any clothes while he was training with Jiraiya, he only carried two outfits on him at any given time during the trip. He was about to punch himself in the face when he saw some black plastic on a hanger.

He cocked his head to the side and pulled it out, it had a small note on it.

_Try and look presentable when you come see me for once. It doesn't get dirty, and it's fire retardant, also, as you can see, I made sure to get it with orange on it so you'd actually wear it. ~ Tsunade._

Naruto opened the plastic cover, and inside it was a black haori with orange flames licking the bottom and orange trimming around the shoulder area. It was sleeveless with a high collar, and on the back, there was a red swirl with an orange kanji for "guts" inscribed within it. Naruto cracked a bright smile, but upon further examination, he wrinkled his nose.

"She didn't give me pants or a shirt."

He turned to his orange shirt strewn across the floor and picked a seal along the sleeve. A pair of grey pants came out, along with a black tank top. Naruto sniffed the pants, they smelled fine, but the shirt…

"Ugh! This smells like fucking poverty!"

Utterly disgusted, Naruto flung the shirt across the room into an open hamper and put the pants on. His hair was still damp, so he tied his forhead protector around his arm and grabbed the orange ribbon from his pile of clothes to tie his ponytail. The jinchuuriki decided to eschew wearing a shirt for the time being as he wasn't to keen on smelling like raw ass. He threw the black haori on and fastened his ninjato to the orange sash belt attached to his pants. Naruto stared at himself in the mirror, impressed, as he hadn't seen what he looked like in what felt like years.

"I _guess _I'm _mildly_ attractive… whatever."

Naruto shrugged and waltzed out the door and into the street. If he was turning heads then, now, he was stopping people in their tracks. Women everywhere were walking into signs, lamp posts, and each other, dropping things left and right. After about a block, a crowd of the curious and horny started following Naruto. He responded by leaping onto a nearby roof. 'Maybe I should have worn a shirt, damn this is annoying!' Naruto thought to himself, but then a familiar, booming voice echoed in his mind as he bounded his way to the Hokage's office.

'_**You do realize that you have your pick of mates in this city, right kit?'**_

' _I told you to shut up a long time ago. I didn't say you could talk yet did I?'_

'_**I'm just pointing out the obvious, you're kind of a fucking moron when it comes to social decorum.'**_

'_You_ of _all living things in the universe_, are lecturing me on social decorum. Think about that for a second.'

'_**What's ironic about that is that I know more about it than you do, not the fact that I'm a demon that kills things for fun. Semantics, kit.'**_

'You and your big words.'

'_**At least you can say I've improved your vocabulary over the years.' **_ The Kyuubi let out a booming laugh that echoed through Naruto's skull. It continued to mock Naruto. _**"Dattebayo!"**_

'You makin' fun of me? I'd turn ya into a fur coat if I could ya bastard!'

'_**Of course.' **The Kyuubi _began to laugh at Naruto's expense.**  
**

Naruto thought hard, and imagined a muzzle around The Kyuubi's mouth. Seconds later, the laughing ceased.

'I'm not taking that off, ever.' Naruto only heard growls as a reply, he chuckled to himself as he walked up to the Hokage's tower. The general staff gawked at Naruto as he walked up to the secretary's desk. Slowly but surely, they all figured out who the Adonis before them was. They all simultaneously squealed in delight, it was loud enough to make Naruto cover his ears and run up to the desk.

The screeching was almost disorienting. "Naruto-chan!"

"You got so tall!"

"When did you get back!?"

Naruto eventually managed to calm down the squealing room, and directed things back on track. "I'm here to see the old lady."

The receptionist who was previously undisturbed by the squealing, was jarred from her paper work, she began to reply; "How dare you refer to the H-" Her eyes locked firmly on Naruto's bare chest for a second and then the seal around his bellybutton. Her eyes slowly worked their way up to Naruto's face and she just stared at him, slack jawed. After about ten seconds, Naruto started snapping in front of her face.

"So you _won't_ sic a buncha ANBU on me if I go up myself right? Right?"

Naruto sighed and went up the elevator to the top floor. As the door opened, he nearly knocked over a woman carrying some stacks of paper. He caught them in mid air before they scattered.

"Naruto-kun?"

"Hey! Shizune-Nee-chan!" Naruto picked her up in a bear hug.

"Naruto! You've grown! I guess I can't call you shrimp-kun anymore huh? You're even taller than me!" Naruto put the woman down.

"I came to see Baa-chan."

"Tsunade-sama is waiting for you, she's not in the best mood right now, but I think seeing you would cheer her up."

"Alright, see ya later!"

"Naruto-kun." The elevator door swooshed shut and Naruto turned to Tunade's office door. Being the kind of guy Naruto is, he couldn't do anything like a normal person, no no no. Naruto proceeded to kick the door in and announce his presence at an obnoxious volume. Bad idea doing that to a room with trained killers in it.

Kakashi fired up his Chidori, but flipped it off when he recognized who came in. Jiraiya jumped a bit and made a move toward his kunai holster, but his mind overrode his reflexes in time. Tsunade on the other hand… yeah, she threw her desk at the "unknown assailant". Naruto used a kawarmi at the last second to dodge the flying desk as it smashed the elevator door behind him.

"Hehe. Hey Baa-chan."

She didn't say anything, she just glared at Naruto. Jiraiya facepalmed, and Kakashi, who was sitting on the windowsill, was staring at Naruto in amusement (Or what Naruto thought was amusement. You could never really tell, 'cause you know, only being able to see one of Kakashi's eyes and all.)

Tsunade walked up to Naruto very slowly. Naruto was ready to be punched in the face or something else painful, but instead Tsunade straightened out his ruffled haori.

"It looks good on you Naruto-chan. Welcome back," Tsunade squeezed Naruto into a spine crunching hug. "By the way, I'm taking that desk out of your next paycheck."

The Hokage let go of Naruto and sat back down before she began speaking.

"Jiraiya filled me in on the details of your trip. I hear you're working on your own version of the Hiraishin, correct?"

Naruto cocked his head to the side and smiled a bit. "I'm still trying to figure out how exactly the kunai work. I'll figure it out and make it even better in no time dattebayo!"

"That's great, the only thing left to talk about is your evaluation."

Naruto frowned. "No."

Tsunade frowned back. "You wish to remain a genin?"

Naruto nodded. "I'm not going up any kind of rank until I drag that prick back here. That, and I'd rather relax for a few days before I get back into fighting and stuff."

Jiraiya cut in. "Naruto's easily a Jonin at this point. You should at least give him the authority of one."

Tsunade shook her head. "Not until he's evaluated."

Naruto sniffed, and in the blink of an eye, he was behind Tsunade, holding the bottle of sake she kept under her chair. "Shizune-nee would freak if she knew you were drinking on the job."

Naruto turned around and flipped the bottle to Tsunade. He cracked a toothy smile.

"I don't think my rank really matters much anyway, It won't help me become Hokage any faster will it?"

Tsunade placed the bottle back under her seat and leaned back in her chair. "True." Kakashi interrupted. "Hokage-sama, if Naruto isn't to be evaluated I'd assume the two of us are free to go?"

Tsunade nodded in reply.

Kakashi motioned for Naruto to follow him out the window. They both lept down into the street.

Tsunade turned to Jiraiya. "He looks just like Minato. We should probably tell him before someone else mentions the resemblance to his face."

Jiraiya scratched his ear and said. "That's probably a good idea, let's let him get settled back in first before we show him Minato and Kushina's wills." Jiraiya started to chuckle. "I'm gonna go do some research in the mean time."

Tsunade rolled her eyes."You mean voyeurism right?"

"Actually, I'll be following Naruto around. I sense he's about to have some girl trouble, and I need new material. The kid's a gold mine!"

Tsunade mused to herself. "So Ougi's based off of Naruto?"

"YOU READ MY BOOKS?!" Jiraiya jumped for joy and picked Tsunade up into a bear hug.

"Jiraiya…Get out of my office before I hit you."

* * *

Don't forget to read and review. Your feedback is greatly appreciated. Till next time!

~ Breath of the Wiz


	3. Chapter 3: Cherry Blossoms

AN: It's storytime kids. I got all the boring stuff out of the way now, its time to screw up Naruto's life… in a good way of course. Make sure to read and review so I stay motivated. Now, it's time for things to get interesting.

* * *

Sakura was sitting in her room, staring at a picture of Team 7. She smiled a bit and wiped some dust off of Naruto's face. "I wonder when he's coming back." As if on cue, her telephone started ringing. Sakura deftly flipped over her bed and answered the phone on her nightstand.

"Haruno residence."

"Hey Forheeeeaaad! Guess who's _back_."

Sakura perked up at hearing this. "Your not messing with me, are you Piggy-chan?"

Ino smirked on the other end. "It's exactly who you think it is, no games! He came into the flower shop about 30 minutes ago!"

Sakura plopped down on her bed and began twirling the phone cord. "Has... Naruto changed any?"

Ino chuckled a bit on the other end. "I really think you should see him for yourself, _but,_ I need someone to vent with… HE'S SOOOO CUUUUUTE!" Sakura pulled away from the receiver as the squeals pierced her ears.

"Naruto? Cute? No way in hell." Sakura was extremely confused. She tried to imagine what Naruto would look like now, she imagined a slightly taller Naruto in a black and orange jumpsuit with a stupid grin on his face. Shaking the image from her mind's eye she still refused to believe Ino, assuming it to be some setup for an elaborate prank.

"I can't quite picture that, Piggy-chan."

Ino rolled her eyes. "That's why I'm telling you to see it for yourself! To think he had the _biggest_ crush on you _ever_. _You lucky b-_"

"Don't finish that sentence if you know what's good for you."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever Forehead."

Sakura thought back to the days when Team 7 was at full capacity, Naruto had really become a dear friend over that time, but Sakura didn't think that she could see him as anything else.

Ino broke the silence. "You only see him as a friend, don't you?"

Sakura jumped. "Are you reading my mind over the phone?!"

Ino laughed. "You know it doesn't work like that Sakura. You haven't even seen'im yet and he's already got your brain all twisted in a knot. Find him and you'll understand JUST _what I mean_."

"I really **don't know what you mean** Piggy-chan."

"Stop talking to me and go! Before I start describing the kinky twisted fantasies in my... head. … _I have to go._"

Sakura frowned. "We haven't talked in a week! What's the rush?"

Ino squealed. "I gotta go take a cold shower!"

Sakura shuddered. "He can't really be that attractive, can he?"

Ino squealed again. "You have _**no**_ idea!" Sakura scratched her head and replied. "Well where is he?" Ino picked up a bath towel and her favorite soap; "I don't know Forehead, he's your teammate, use that big brain of yours! _I'm hanging up now." _Sakura sighed as she could hear her friend skipping toward the bathroom as she hit the end call button.

Sakura switched out her lab coat and tights for her usual black leggings and red tank top. The Kunoichi had filled out nicely over the years, having grown to a respectable 5'6", and her formerly flat chest had decided to change its tone. Sakura's chest however, wasn't her most distinguishing feature. It wasn't her eyes, or her lips, or anything socially acceptable like that... Let's just say that enthusiastic complements concerning her derrière had drastically increased in quantity, make of that what you will...

She looked at herself one more time before tying her hair up, akin to the way Anko would do her hair. Sakura leaned back, and exhaled as her spine made creaking and popping noises in protest. She put her red forehead protector in its usual place on her head and strolled out the door.

* * *

Naruto and Kakashi were walking down the street in silence. Naruto was annoyed, Kakashi was amused, these feelings were mainly inspired by the reactions of the female (and a small subset of the male) population of Konoha. What Kakashi found the most entertaining was the fact that Naruto's pouty face made him look aloof and elegant, which in turn, drew even more attention to his former student.

"You know, I don't think that facial expression is helping you go unnoticed, Naruto."

"Then what face should I make huh?!"

"I don't know, but you look a lot like Sasuke right now."

Naruto's facial expression snapped to disgust, and then back to normal.

"Oi, Kakashi-sensei. Is this better?"

"No. Just forget I said anything. It is what it is."

Naruto stared at Kakashi for a second and laughed to himself.

Kakashi raised his visible eyebrow. That was the one eyed ninja's way of asking for an explanation. Naruto put his hands behind his head, which gave everyone on the street a full view of his shredded torso. Squeals were heard everywhere, Naruto immediately held his haori shut. "Anyway, it's just that someone used to say that to me all the time."

Kakashi smirked, unbeknownst to Naruto. "And who exactly would say that to you all the time?"

"Inu-san! Man, I wonder if he's still alive."

"Who now?"

Naruto looked up at the blue sky. "When I was little, there was an ANBU assigned to guard me. I didn't see him much, but I knew he was there. He'd leave me food, presents, and he'd also protect me from angry mobs and other crap that wanted to kill me dead." Naruto motioned with his hands, in an attempt to emulate this _'Inu-san' _he spoke so fondly of.

"If I asked him why these things happened to me he'd just say; _"It is what it is." ... _He's probably dead now though._"_

Kakashi flipped his porno novel out and nonchalantly replied. "Yeah... that was me."

"NANI?!"

Kakashi answered without looking up. "What about it?"

"Ne, Kakashi-sensei, exactly how long have you been part of my life?"

"Since day one pretty much." Kakashi flipped a page. "Why do you think you ended up on Team 7? I requested you. Sandaime-sama wanted me to continue keeping an eye on you after I quit the ANBU, and that was the easiest way to do it at the time. Does it really at this point?"

"YEAH! What other secrets are you guys keeping from me?"

Kakashi tapped his forhead protector. "I'm a ninja, remember? We're entitled to secrets."

"Fine... Where're we goin' anyways?"

"Ichiraku's, my treat."

"No complaints here!" Naruto was doing backflips on the inside. He thought back to the time that Team 7 tried to see Kakashi's face, and now he'd get to see it. That and the free ramen was a plus.

* * *

Sakura walked down the street, her eyes scanning for even the slightest glimpse of orange, or a neon blonde mop of hair. Having strolled around for 10 minutes she slapped her rather ample forhead. "What's it called? … Ichiki's? No… Ichiraku! That's where he'd always offer to take me." She ran up the side of the nearest building, much to the confusion of the common population, who shortly after, dismissed it as "ninja shit."

Sakura lept from roof top to roof top, still scanning for the slightest glimpse of orange. As she approached the ichiraku ramen stand, she saw that it was the most crowded area on the street. She landed near the front of the crowd, and tried to figure out what, or _who_ was drawing so much attention. She looked through the bustling street in an attempt to find a familiar face, but she couldn't see anything. There were just a bunch of girls everywhere squealing and gossiping.

Sakura figured they must have been talking about Naruto based on their descriptions and adjectives, "blonde", "orange", "sexy". She stopped listening when their conversation went into the gutter. Sakura was unable to reach the ramen stand itself due to the circle of girls around the establishment. She yelled. "SHANNARO! GET OUT OF MY WAY!" The crowd recognized the voice and parted like the Red Sea. Sakura proudly walked through the divide and stopped just in front of Ichiraku's.

"Sakura-chan." Her heart skipped for a second, but the voice was of a more relaxed tone. Kakashi was next to her before she knew it.

"Hey Kakashi-sensei."

Kakashi eyed her dully for a second. "You're looking for Naruto, right?"

"Right."

"Well, I was eating ramen with him, but he started acting really weird when we got our bowls. I'd figured something was up so I slipped out while he was breaking his chopsticks."

"So he was here with you?"

"Yup. He's right there actually." Kakashi pointed to the lone figure in the stand.

Sakura saw the bottom half of a black haori and some grey pants with orange wraps around the ankles. She also saw an ornate sword, and some black ninja sandals. She couldn't see anything else due to the curtain on the stand. Her eyes narrowed and she began crossing the gap between the crowd and Ichiraku's, but she froze in her tracks when she heard a familiar, yet unrecognizable voice come from the stand.

"Nice to see you too Ojiisan! Tell Ayame-nee I said hi!"

The figure got off the stool and appeared to take a deep breath before turning around and walking through the curtain. Everything went in slow motion for Sakura. The look of skepticism on her face switched to confusion as she finally saw how much Naruto had changed in the last 2 and a-half years. Ino wasn't lying, he **_was _**gorgeous_._

Naruto's attractiveness notwithstanding, a wave of emotion passed over Sakura, she thought back to all the times that Naruto to had saved her, all the times he'd been there, and the guilt she'd felt when she learned that Sasuke tried to kill him. Every word of Naruto's promise to her felt like a knife in her heart.

She flashed back to that moment when he made his promise to her. In that very moment, the smile on his face was fake, it was masking disgust. She could tell that Naruto didn't want to have anything else to do with Sasuke at that point, yet he was going through with it for her sake. He was the primary reason that she'd progressed so far, so that she could be there to help him fulfill his promise.

Sakura's deep and emotional thoughts concerning her history with Naruto were interrupted when a gust of wind ruffled his hair and opened his haori up. He wasn't wearing a shirt. He wasn't wearing a shirt and he was shredded. He wasn't wearing a shirt, he was shredded, and he was... Naruto?

Sakura's train of thought was snapped from beautiful memories to lewd fantasies in an instant. She looked Naruto up and down, but her ogling was interrupted when she realized that his eyes had locked with hers and he gave her his trademark grin. Time slowed down for Sakura as she watched the wind blow through Naruto's features, she unconsciously smiled at him, he was back, and he was... _**hot?**_

Sakura's look of awe and admiration turned to horror when she finally realized that he was walking toward her, saying something. She couldn't hear him though, it was a little hard to breathe, and her ears were ringing really loudly. How could she keep calm in this situation? She looked so plain that day, she didn't put on lipstick, or makeup, or even a decent set of clothing. No jewelry or low cut shirts, she hadn't even done her hair! Naruto would think tha- Oh no.

He was picking her up and hugging her, she could feel his muscles through her shirt, she could even feel his heartbeat. Her face was inches from his, Sakura felt like she was falling into his electric blue eyes. Her entire body went numb, and her field of vision became a small faraway dot with Naruto's eyes in the center, then, that small dot disappeared.

* * *

Reviews with constructive criticism are much appreciated. Thanks for reading

~ Breath of the Wiz

_Signin' Off_


	4. Chapter 4: Sibling Rivalry

AN: I'm on a roll so I figured I'd double update. Naruto's gonna meet Hinata this chapter, and there's going to be a surprise addition to Naruto's harem, mostly for crack purposes and other cheap laughs. The harem itself may get a bit extensive, but in the end, he can only end up with one girl. You may question this, so let me explain. My goal is to keep everyone as in character as possible, and none of these women would be open to sharing a man with anyone. With that said, the competition for Naruto will make the character interactions between the women a lot funnier, this way, you can expect some date sabotage and overall cattiness. If I did otherwise, the girls would have no reason to actually try, since they'd be guaranteed a chance with Naruto.

* * *

Naruto looked at the girl he was holding in confusion.

"Eh? Sakura-chan?" Naruto comically tried to wake her up, but to no avail.

The female population was looking at the limp form of Sakura with a mixture of jealousy, anger, and fear. Kakashi was inwardly laughing his ass off, and Jiraiya was **actually** laughing his ass off on a nearby roof while he manically scribbled on his notepad.

"Oi, Sakura-chan! … Damn. Maybe she didn't recognize me. Hey, Kakashi-sensei!"

Kakashi put his porn away and walked over to his former students. "Yo."

"Should I take her to the hospital?"

"They'll just make you pay them to tell you she'll be fine... No point really." Kakashi put his hands in his pockets and looked around nonchalantly, "I'll leave you two be." Naruto's former teacher promptly disappeared in a poof of smoke.

"Eh. What?" Naruto then realized that he was encircled by horny women. He stared blankly at the civilians, who all continued to stare at Sakura, as if she were a murderer before a jury. He realized that he still had Sakura in a bear hug, so he switched her to a bridal carry. There were whispers among the crowd as they began to creep toward the two ninja.

"Is Hokage-sama's apprentice your girlfriend?"

Naruto sputtered. "Nani? Girlfriend?" Naruto looked down at the unconscious girl in his arms... she was making a very unattractive face. Naruto was about to laugh at her, but was interrupted by voices from the crowd.

"I can show you a better time than she can any day!"

"You'd just give him an STD, bitch! ... I'm clean Naruto!"

The crowd began fighting amongst itself.

"Just let me love you, blonde stranger!"

"Will you marry me?!"

"ALLOW ME TO HAVE YOUR CHILDREN!"

"I LOVE YOU NARUTO!"

Naruto looked back and forth to find the sources of these voices and declarations of love. Naruto had only garnered hatred from large crowds of people, so this reaction was rather jarring, he didn't know what to say to all of the sudden affection. The crowd started creeping toward Naruto and Sakura, the sounds becoming unintelligible as it got louder. Naruto started to feel naked and insecure, so he jumped to the nearest roof and looked down at the crowd as they continued to yell obscene details of their sexual fantasies involving him. He sat down and positioned Sakura so that she was sitting across his lap, facing off to his left.

He once again tried to wake her up, it didn't work, but he had an idea. Naruto put his hand on her stomach and applied pressure to a point on Sakura's neck. She started to fidget, so then he pressed down on her stomach and she gave a squeak as she woke up. She had instinctively grabbed the nearest object when she woke up... Her arms landed around Naruto's neck, and Sakura was once again awake... with her forehead touching Naruto's. The way in which Naruto was holding her felt a little too romantic to Sakura, so she turned pink, and once again passed out. Between the current situation and the embarrassment of fainting like a startled goat.

Naruto huffed in mild annoyance and used shunshin to transport himself and Sakura to her house.

Naruto jiggled the doorknob for a second, then he slapped the door. It slowly squeaked open. "I'm surprised she hasn't had that fixed yet." Naruto walked in through the wooden door, and as he looked around, he realized that everything was organized and pristine, like a hospital. He set the unconscious Sakura on the couch and went to her stainless steel fridge. "Eh? No juice or soda? … Vitamin water? The hell is this crap?"

'**What are you doing, Kit? The female is unconscious, plant your seed!'**

Naruto shuddered at the thought. 'And the guru of social decorum returns!_ Where'd your muzzle go anyway?!'_

'_**It disappears as soon as you stop thinking about it.'**_

_**'**Why don't you take a motherf-'  
_

Naruto's ears perked up as he heard Sakura sit up on the couch, several seconds passed, and he became confused as to why she hadn't said anything yet. Naruto stood up from the fridge and closed it as he turned around. Sakura was staring at him wide eyed, her face was the same shade of pink as her hair. Naruto leaned on the fridge and smiled at her as he said "Sakura-chan, you still haven't said hello, we have a lot of catching up to do!" Naruto put his hands in his haori's pockets and waited for her to say something.

Sakura's mind was racing once again, between the emotion of seeing him again, and the level to which he'd changed, she couldn't function properly. Sakura thought back to her training with Tsunade, and managed to calm herself down enough to speak.

"I-It's nice to have you back, Naruto. I'm sorry for fainting earlier, I just didn't expect to... see you."

'**SHANNAROOOO! I'm gonna fuck his brains out!' **Inner Sakura began to translate, much to Outer Sakura's embarassment.

'What're you talking about? That's still Naruto!'

**'And I... WE want him.'**

Sakura's face went from pink to red as she stared down at the coffee table. What was she doing? Internal debate aside, this was Naruto she was talking to, he was the same guy as he was when he left with Jiraiya-sama, just taller now. Sakura calmed herself down and stood up as she walked over to her former teammate.

"You've changed, Naruto."

"You have too, Sakura-chan. You're hotter than ever!"

Sakura smiled in reply.

Naruto stopped leaning on the fridge and closed the remaining distance toward Sakura. Sakura laughed a bit and made her observation of Naruto. "You're **actually** taller than me now."

Naruto beamed. "Get used to it, I'm not even done growing yet! 'Ttebayo! I'll be pushin' six feet in no time!"

Inner Sakura squealed as Sakura imagined having to be picked up to kiss Naruto… kiss Naruto? … ugh. But still, 6'1" is nice, very nice. Sakura snapped out of her thoughts when she caught herself staring at Naruto's abs.

**'SHANNAROOO! Stop playing yourself and rip his clothes off! You know he won't mind!' **

She shook her head a bit and scowled at her inner self, outwardly, it appeared to be directed at Naruto.

Naruto got confused, and slightly worried. "Hey... You're not going to hit me or anything are you Sakura-chan? Was it something I said?"

Sakura smiled again and shook her head. "It's nothing." She looked up at Naruto and nervously continued to speak. "It was nice seeing you, but I have... some errands to run, sorry Naruto-kun!" Sakura slid Naruto toward the door, Naruto got even more confused and muttered to himself. "Naruto...**kun**?" Sakura finally slid him out the door and moved to shut it, but the door stopped at the last second.

"Sakura-chan, I haven't forgotten my promise to you." With that, Naruto allowed her to close the door. Sakura's stomach flipped on its side when she heard the determination in his voice, she felt like crying, but she composed herself as she put her back to the door and slid down into a sitting position.

Sakura muttered to herself. "Naruto, why? Why all this for me? Do I really mean that much to you?"

Her face was still pink, and her hands were freezing, but Sakura managed to calm herself down with thoughts from the early days of Team 7. She got up and walked through her house and entered her room. She grabbed her telephone and flipped onto the bed as she hit Ino's speed dial key, now, it was her turn to vent.

* * *

Naruto walked down the street, having only been back in Konoha for a few hours, he decided to just walk around aimlessly until he found something to do. As he walked through the park, all activity ceased. Naruto, still not quite accustomed to his newfound magnetism would have taken notice, but he was more interested in the figure sitting on the bench. She was facing away from him, but her raven black hair was a dead giveaway.

"Hey, Hinata-chan!" The girl looked up, and turned around. It wasn't her. "Oh… Hanabi, right?" She looked at him, blankly. "Yes, that's correct." The preteen stopped sketching in her notebook and got off the bench. She spoke as she walked over to Naruto. "I saw you beat my cousin in the chuunin exams. Naruto Uzumaki, is that your name?"

Naruto nodded and scratched the back of his head. "Sorry for mixing you up with your sister. Know where she is?" Hanabi flipped her Byakugan on and off. She pointed toward the training grounds. "I believe she is in Training Area 5."

"Thanks!" Naruto gave her a thumbs-up. Hanabi nodded in reply. "You're welcome, Uzumaki-san." Naruto used a shunshin as Hanabi returned to the bench and continued sketching the park for a few minutes. She paused, and tucked her notebook into her satchel as she began walking toward Training Area 5.

* * *

Naruto reappeared in the clearing of the training area. He began walking toward the nearest noise, as he came through the bushes, he saw Hinata training. She was tossing some small logs into the air, as they came down, she'd split them with her Juken. "Oi! Hinata-chan!"

She turned to the blonde stranger as he approached her. "Hey! You remember me, right Hinata-chan?" Hinata stared and shook her head. "Sorry, I'm not sure we've met, sir." Naruto sighed and put his hands in his pockets. "Well, it was great seeing you. You've grown rather beautiful since I've been gone." Hinata smiled and bowed. "Thank you, sir, but I'm not interested in seeing anyone at the moment."

"Eh? Nevermind, I'll see you later Hinata-chan." Naruto was miffed. 'She doesn't even recognize me! I didn't even say anything about dating either! I can't have changed that much!' Naruto used a shunshin and disappeared.

Hinata thought for a second, then she realized that the strange man had said that he'd been gone. Then she realized that he had whisker marks on his cheeks. Hinata's face turned pink, "N-Naruto-kun? He said I was… I was... heh." Hinata started to giggle and stumbled backward, luckily, she was able to snap herself awake before she hit the ground. She giggled to herself and started fidgeting as she thought about all things Naruto. "Naruto-kun... you're home again."

Hanabi came out to the clearing seconds after Hinata's little episode. "Hinata-nee-san." Hinata took a deep breath as she forced the red from her face and turned toward her sister. "Hanabi-imouto? What is it?"

A look of determination was plastered to the younger sister's face. "Do you love Uzumaki-san?" Hinata's attempt at appearing composed was thwarted by the sound of his name. She turned pink once again and nodded as she let her head hang. Hanabi looked at her sister and gave a startling reply.

"I suggest you begin courting Uzumaki-san as soon as possible."

"M-me and Naruto-kun?" Hinata started to shiver at the thought. Hanabi nodded in affirmation.

"Hinata-nee-san, if you don't... I'm going to steal him from you."

"N-nani?!" Hinata's pink face took a fearful expression. Hanabi continued to explain.

"I wish to bear Uzumaki-san's children, I believe he would make an excellent father and husband. Also, the resulting offspring would be a great asset to the clan."

"Naruto-kun… father… children." Hinata's face turned a shade of deep scarlet, and she fainted on the spot. Hanabi stared at her sister indifferently and pulled her under a tree to keep her from being sunburned.

"Uzumaki-san will be mine, if you desire him more, you'd best begin courting him before I seal the deal."

* * *

Naruto, was walking aimlessly down the street until he sneezed. He looked around in confusion, especially since it was the middle of the summer, nobody got colds in the summer. He gave a bewildered look.

"Hmm. I feel like I'm in some sort of danger. Ah well, nothin' new to me! I'm gonna go see Shikamaru!"

* * *

This idea just popped up in my head as I was writing. I think Hanabi as competition would serve as good motivation for Hinata to make a move of her own, not to mention the awkwardness of being propositioned by a 10 year old. It'll all serve as a good source of laughs for the rest of the story. Don't worry, Hanabi is to remain a minor member of the harem due to the age difference. This shit's fun, so keep the reviews coming so I can get some ideas.

~ Breath of the Wiz

_Signin' off._


	5. Chapter 5: Snakes In the Grass

AN: Some of you have voiced your confusion pertaining to this story's status as a harem. It's functionally a harem, but not completely. Eventually, Naruto will have to choose someone (this however, won't happen until the final chapter). The antics associated with dating multiple women still apply, so this is why I have it listed as a harem. Naruto may have to choose, but the girls are all going to make it a hellish ordeal for him to follow through with. He'll be in relationships with all of them, but I know for a fact that none of these characters would be open to sharing once he ties the knot. That's why I'm saying he'll have to choose, but we'll put that off for now. Chapter 5… begin.

* * *

Naruto walked down the streets of Konoha, unsure of how to react to all of the affection, so he just smiled and waved. He still couldn't seem to shake the nagging feeling that he was in some sort of danger, especially since the hairs on his neck were still standing up. Naruto however, thought nothing of the feeling, he had sneezed earlier, which likely meant he was the topic of conversation somewhere, but that just comes with the territory of shinobi life. So why was he...

Naruto's ears perked up, he heard a whistling sound rapidly approach the back of his head. Kunai. Naruto cocked his head to the side and it flew by, impacting the ground in front of him. He crouched and began to draw his sword as he spun around to face the assailant.

As he was turning around, a firm palm strike to his wrist held his half drawn sword in place, and instead of a would-be assassin… he got an eyeful of… cleavage? The assailant's free hand pulled his head toward her chest and held it there for a second. Naruto didn't smell any poison-gas or chloroform, so he waited, especially as he had an idea of who this person was.

He heard a sultry voice laugh at him. "So you dodged it this time. Shame, your blood's _really_ tasty."

That confirmed Naruto's guess. He shivered in apprehension at their first meeting.

* * *

_Flashback no Jutsu!_

_"Do your worst! You're not scarin' me away! I can handle anything you throw at me, dattebayo!"_

_A kunai flew past his face, cutting his cheek. It was so fast that he couldn't even perceive it; he immediately heard the sound of metal smacking against flesh behind his head. She was behind him now, and she'd caught the same kunai she'd thrown at him as it flew past is head. Blood started to run from Naruto's cheek._

_"Tough guys like you usually leave their blood **all over** this forest." She paused. "Aww, are you shaking? You're just as cute as a button!"_

_She licked the bleeding cheek slow enough to make Naruto wince in pain. She cooed to him in a mocking tone "Well aren't you the tasty one." She licked him one more time and pressed a sheet of paper to his chest as she whispered in his ear. "It's required that you sign this waiver before you go in, it's so that we can formally declare you dead without consequence when you inevitably go missing. I'd wish you luck, but that's just mean-spirited." She patted Naruto on the back as she walked away._

_Naruto laughed nervously as his teammates came over to him. Sasuke was the first to speak; "Way to attract a bunch of unnecessary attention to ourselves, dobe." Sakura, for once actually seemed visibly worried about Naruto. "She's off in the head. Are you alright?"_

_Naruto's eye twitched. "Heheh, no."_

_Flashback no Jutsu, Kai!_

* * *

Naruto's eye twitched. "Heeey... crazy snake lady."

"Welcome back, Naruto." She continued to mock him in a patronizing tone. "You don't seem very happy to see me."

"I'm waiting for you to bite my jugular and suck me dry… I shouldn't have said that." Naruto removed his head from Anko's cleavage and took a couple steps back. Naruto blinked once, and she was once again inches away. Anko was holding open his haori and running her... abnormally _soft_ hands down his abs as she stared hungrily into his eyes.

A familiar voice echoed through Naruto's conscious. _**'Kit. She's in heat. SPLIT. HER. IN HALF!'**_

Naruto mentally replied. '_Oh my God would you shut the fu-'_

He was interrupted when she pressed her chest to his upper stomach and began to talk again. "You really shouldn't have said that. You're giving me ideas, _Naru-chan_." The way she said Naru-chan made his face heat up, that, and his pants were starting to feel a little tight. She tugged gently on Naruto's pendant, he didn't fight her as she guided his lips down to meet hers. Naruto closed his eyes in anticipation… but the kiss never came. Naruto opened his eyes and Anko flicked him on the nose, she'd somehow gotten an arm's length away from him, again, without him noticing.

The females on the street sighed in relief, and the men… they were discouraged, civilian and ninja alike. Anko hadn't so much as touched anyone since her ninja career began, she's **said** plenty of kinky things, but it was as she demonstrated to Naruto almost 3 years ago. Talk is cheap.

Anko smirked at Naruto. "It's nice to see that you've grown into something worth looking at." She winked at him. "Left ya a present." Anko licked her lips and disappeared in a swirl of leaves after pointing to a spot on her neck, just above the collar bone.

Naruto touched the same spot on his neck… it was wet, and it stung a bit.

"Oh... she gave me a hickey... WHEN DID SHE GIVE ME A HICKEY?!"

A rather large hand clapped Naruto on the back; the sensation was followed by an equally rowdy sounding voice. "Why even question it? Lucky bastard!" Naruto turned to the voice and beamed.

"Kiba! … But where's Aka- HOLY SHIT!" Akamaru tackled Naruto, this would be cute, if it weren't for the fact that the canine was now as big as Kiba and Naruto combined.

"Hey Kiba! What're you feedin' this guy?" Naruto squirmed out from under the giant dog and stood up to give him a hug. Naruto didn't even have to kneel for Akamaru to lick his face.

"Eh. Sides of beef, kibble… human bodies."

"Nani?" Naruto turned to Kiba skeptically, and then looked back to Akamaru.

Kiba shrugged and elaborated. "I let him eat what he kills on missions, sometimes he kills enemy ninja... eats 'em."

Naruto looked at Akamaru's fangs, and blinked. "Badass. How've ya been dog-boy?"

Kiba yanked Naruto up by the collar. "Forget me! How'd you get Anko to talk to you? Let alone touch you!"

Naruto shuddered, "We met during the second part of the chuunin exams, she tried to traumatize me. It worked. I don't think she's gonna to let me live it down… It's all just a sick joke to her."

Kiba put Naruto in a headlock. "She wasn't messing with you, you moron! She gave you a hickey!"

"Eh? So?" Naruto managed to slip out of Kiba's grip.

Kiba swiveled his head toward Naruto. "It's like markin' territory! She wants yer dick, and wanted to make sure _everybody_ knows."

Naruto looked at Kiba with his patented skeptical look. "Yeah, sure Kiba."

Kiba sighed. "Fine, don't believe me." Kiba looked at his watch. "I'll catch you later; my team has a meeting on training ground 5. See ya Naruto!" Kiba jumped on Akamaru's back and they lept away.

Naruto checked his body for any more presents from Anko. Not finding any, he continued on his way to… where was he going again?

* * *

"That's it? We're just gonna toss him the keys and tell him?" Jiraiya raised his brow at Tsunade.

Tsunade slammed her desk and the entire building shuddered. "JIRAIYA! I've explained to you the ceremonial method three times already, but you kept asking me to repeat myself! We're just telling him now since you seem to be going senile."

Jiraiya thought for a second and cocked his head to the side. "I'll be honest, I just couldn't stop staring at your breasts. I'll listen this time, I promise!"

Tsunade immediately leapt over the desk to punch her former teammate in the face, her ample bosom jiggled and bounced as she flew through the air. Jiraiya gave a lecherous grin as he ducked under her punch and shoved his face into her cleavage as he allowed her to land on top of him.

Tsunade, caught off guard just stared at Jiraiya, with his face buried in her cleavage. Jiraiya's muffled voice came from Tsunade's chest.

"Doesn't this remind you of that time when we were 16 and we decided to experiment with-"

"Jiraiya." Tsunade interrupted and smiled menacingly as she sat up and clenched her hands around his throat. "Give me a reason **not **to strangle you to death."

Jiraiya instantly squeaked out his answer. "You'd be insulted if I wasn't staring at them, right… right?"

Tsunade stared down at Jiraiya and conceded his point. "Touché. But that wasn't a very good reason." Tsunade smiled at Jiraiya again and tightened her grip around his throat.

Jiraiya squeaked again as his windpipe was being crushed. "Tsunade-hime... Is wrong that this turns me on?" Tsunade did a backflip to the other side of the room when she felt a bulge near her rear end.

* * *

"JIRAIYA GET THE HELL OUT OF MY OFFICE!"

Shizune heard the voice and the following crashes from the bottom floor as she photocopied paperwork for the Hokage. She shook her head and turned to an intern as she spoke her mind. "They could resolve a lot of tension in their relationship if they just got married, or if they even started dating again."

Shizune chuckled along with the rest of the room when they heard the sound of shattering glass and Jiraiya's high-pitched grunt as he hit the ground outside their own window. The Hokage's aide sighed as she pulled a phone off the wall. "Yukina-san? It's Shizune, Could you please get another window to the Hokage's office? … Yes… the usual, put it on Hokage-sama's tab."

* * *

Naruto, in his aimless wandering was startled by the arrival of his current sensei… via air-mail apparently.

"Oi, Ero Sannin. Disagreement with Baa-chan?"

Jiraiya flipped onto his feet and loudly cracked his spine. Naruto winced at him before he began talking. "Oh no. I think we're on the same page now. She actually sent me to come get you, Gaki."

"Alright!" Naruto jumped from the ground up to the window of Tsunade's office. She didn't even notice him, likely because she was drinking sake… straight from the bottle… in large drags.

Naruto, crouched on the windowsill, looked at the Hokage in disgust. "Oi, Baa-chan!"

Tsunade jumped and turned to Naruto, a rosy tint on her cheeks. She slurred out. "Ohyeah. Imma... give you yer *hic* inheritance now."

Naruto stared blankly at Tsunade. "My inheritance… wat?"

Jiraiya poked his head into the door of the office and gave Tsunade a goofy smile. He took cover behind the door when a bottle of sake shattered on it.

"Shit Naruto. YES you're inheritance! YOU'RE REALLY DENSE, YOU KNOW THAT?!"

Naruto continued to stare at the drunken Tsunade blankly as he walked around to the front of her desk. "Baa-chan? Your anger seems misplaced, I didn't do anything yet."

"Sorry it's just-" Tsunade's slur was cut off as she jumped up and took a drunken swing at Jiraiya, who was now standing next to her as she sat at her recently replaced desk. He ducked under the punch, but was startled by the gust of wind that followed it. It was strong enough to make all the paper in the room fly out the window. "... If that had hit me..." Tsunade, visibly drunk, stared angrily, and then suddenly passed out on Jiraiya.

Naruto stared at the two sannin in anticipation, so Jiraiya propped Tsunade up with one arm, and used his other to point to the scrolls on the desk.

"I suggest you read them in private."

Naruto looked between two the Sannin and the scrolls back and forth for several seconds.

Naruto smiled. "I had parents."

"Yes Naruto, yes you did."

* * *

AN: It's time for Naruto to receive his inheritance. And you know what that means! BIG. ASS. MANSION. And yes, Anko is officially part of the harem. Jailbait? Ain't nobody got time fo dat! Anko gives no fucks when it comes to age gaps... or safe-words for that matter. Whatevs.

~ Breath of the Wiz, _Signing Off._


	6. Chapter 6: Hidden Lineage

*Update* Don't forget to check out the poll on my profile for the 6th girl.

_***Update #2 8/9/2015* The 6th girl has been voted for and Female Gaara has been chosen.**_

* * *

Naruto left the Hokage's office with a look of raw anticipation on his face as he stared at the scrolls in his hands. They were heavy, much heavier than they looked. One was yellow, with silver trim and a silver clasp on it, this clasp had a seal engraved onto it. The kanji in the center of the seal said "From Dad", Naruto took notice of the other scroll, which was aesthetically identical, save for the colors. It was a deep red, and where the other scroll was silver, it was gold. The seal had "From Mother" on it, and as he looked down at these two objects, Naruto felt waves of… something. There were far too many distinct emotions swirling in Naruto's mind for him to describe with words.

As Naruto entered his apartment, he walked into the kitchen and attempted to pry open the red scroll. The scroll zapped him with a small jolt of what felt like electricity. He looked at the seal engraved into the gold clasp. Recalling the things Jiraiya taught him about seals, Naruto recognized the design as a blood seal. Naruto ran his thumb across a kunai and touched the seal. The red scroll promptly unfurled itself and Naruto began to read, but the first few words appeared to be smudged by tears. The writing continued underneath.

"_Naruto Uzumaki, my son. If you're reading this, I've died before you came of age. If that is the case, my greatest regret is that I'll never get to see you grow up, nor will I get to truly experience being your mother. I love you, my son. Enclosed in the seal below this are all of my personal effects I wish to pass on to you, as are your fathers'. If you happen to read this letter first, please wait and read what your father wrote to you. Then open the seal. I love you, my son. Please, be strong._

_Your Mother; Kushina Uzumaki."_

Naruto's heartbeat sped up as he read the name of his mother. "But that was the name of the…" Naruto's head slowly turned to the currently sealed yellow scroll. He touched it and popped it open.

"_Naruto, sorry, but I have to be brief. The Kyuubi is stomping through the village as we speak and I need to prepare your seal. I know you probably hate me for doing this to you, but I can't ask someone to willingly put their child through the life of a jinchuuriki if I'm not willing to sacrifice my own first. My name is Minato Namikaze, Naruto, I'm your father."_

Naruto stared down at the scroll, feeling empty. All of his misplaced hatred for the Yondaime no longer had a place in his soul to reside. Naruto felt a strange mix of emptiness, and excitement. He finally learned who his parents were, and they were non other then the Bloody Habañero and the Yellow Flash at that, but they're also the reason he lived a life of isolation. Naruto figured that he'd sort his emotions out over time. He looked at his father's scroll and continued reading.

"_I need you to be strong for me Naruto. I'm sorry that our identities have been kept secret from you for so long, but I have a lot of enemies. I could never forgive myself if something happened to you. Naruto, I'm begging you, please don't turn out like all the other jinchuuriki, don't become the monster sealed within you._

_The sealing process will kill me, so this is the last time I'll get to see you. I'm sorry I couldn't be a father to you, sorry that I could never be there to teach you things, sorry that I couldn't protect you from the harshness of the world, but I'm the 4th Hokage. I have to preserve the Will of Fire, even if it costs me my life. See you on the other side. I love you, Naruto Namikaze-Uzumaki._

_Good luck, and stay strong,_

_Minato "The Yellow Flash" Namikaze; 4th Hokage of Konohagakure_

_~Signing off."_

Tears welled up in Naruto's eyes, and for the first time in 3 years, he cried. All of the pent up anger, sadness, fear, and loneliness from his life released itself all at that moment. Naruto managed to compose himself after a few minutes and returned to his mother's scroll, he pumped chakra into the left seal. Out came several keys linked to a key-ring along with an attached note.

"_This is the key to our home, I hope you find it useful. It's the big one in the park, with the red gates, you can't miss it. ~Mom"_

Naruto perked up and looked at his tidy, yet dilapidated dwelling. He would be more than happy to move out, it's not like the place had any sentimental value, to Naruto, it was just a place to live.

The blonde smiled and went up to his room and place his finger through the loop of the kunai embedded in the floorboards. He once again disappeared in a yellow flash.

Our hero appeared on that familiar hill and turned to the graves once more, he sat down in front of Haku's marker and stared at it. He began to talk after a short silence.

"Haku-chan. I found out who my parents were today. I was finally old enough to receive my inheritance, so… I'm proud of them. It was a pleasant surprise. I just wanted to share that with you… I know that your experience with parents wasn't a bright one, you deserved better. Had you been born in Konoha, you'd still be alive today, you'd be here with me."

Naruto felt a lump in his throat as he remembered the end of their fight on the bridge.

* * *

_Flashback no Jutsu!_

_"WHY! WHY DID IT HAVE TO BE YOU?!" A red eyed Naruto roared at a solemn Haku as her broken mask clattered on the ground._

_Her voice was barely a whisper. "It seems that fate has drawn us together, Naruto." Haku stumbled toward Naruto, almost falling. Naruto stepped in and caught her, her weak voice continued._

_"Sasuke will be fine. It's the same trick I pulled on you earlier with Zabuza."_

_Naruto sat down with her and let her rest her head on his chest. He looked at the top of her head. "You really aren't cut out to be a ninja, you're too gentle. Why __**not **__kill him?"_

_Haku looked at Naruto, tired beyond imagination. "When a person has something important they want to protect that's when they can become truly strong."_

_Naruto blinked at Haku. "You lost on purpose?"_

_Haku cupped Naruto's face. "No, you beat me all your own. I just couldn't bear to kill you. The only way out of that battle was for one of us to die, I knew you were strong Naruto, so I just had to give you a reason to defeat me."_

_Naruto hugged Haku tighter, and she hugged him back. Suddenly, Haku struggled from Naruto's embrace._

_"Zabuza is in trouble." Naruto also stood up in protest._

_"Haku, you're too injured to do anything. You'll only get killed. I know it's against your nindo, but I can't let you throw your life away!" Naruto grabbed her wrist, but then he saw her other hand swing at him. He took a step back to dodge, but suddenly realized pressure in the side of his neck. Naruto immediately took notice of the needle buried in his flesh, and suddenly fell to the ground, numb all over. Haku propped Naruto up on the guard rail and knelt down so that they were eye level._

_"I can't leave him to die after everything he's done for me. Goodbye, Naruto."_

_Naruto struggled to speak. "H-Haku."_

_She stood up and turned, but hesitated when she saw the tears in his eyes. She knelt back down and stared into his eyes, she paused, and then kissed him. Miraculously, Naruto was able to pick his arm up and wipe one of her tears away after their lips parted. She held his hand to her face and stared longingly at him for what felt like an eternity. Naruto realized that she was waiting for him to come to terms with it. Naruto tried to speak, but his body faught him every step of the way._

'_So, is this the life of a ninja?' Naruto thought to himself, Haku nodded to him as if she could hear his thoughts._

_Naruto's vision faded on the image of her smiling face. That was the last time he saw her alive._

_Flashback no Jutsu, Kai!_

* * *

Naruto stared at her grave marker and sighed. "I have to go again, Haku-chan. It's not normal that I get to see you twice a day. I have to get ready to move out tonight, so I'll stop by in a few days."

Naruto got up and teleported back to his room. The influx of emotions over the last few hours made Naruto fail to notice the figures hiding in the tree line overlooking the bridge.

* * *

Dun Dun Dun ~~~~~ More to come soon. Remember to follow, fave, and review so I can stay motivated!

~Breath of the Wiz

_Signing Off_


	7. Chapter 7: Housewarming

AN: Here it is, the extended chapter. This is the point in the story where the adventure, action, and drama will begin to come into play. Don't worry, I know this story is tagged under humor, so I won't forget my roots. Laughs will always be a part of this project. Now that all the pieces are in place, it's time to kick off the real story. This chapter will start us off, and after this, there's no telling where it'll all go.

***Update: 8/9/2015* _I periodically reread sections of Orange Flash, and I just realized that Mitsuki's attraction to Naruto seems to come out of nowhere. I've added a bit of interaction to their meeting in the chapter to help alleviate that. Also, for future reference any sort of retcon I choose to do will NOT change any event that you've previously read, they'll only add in small things that make the narrative feel a bit tighter._**

* * *

Naruto felt a pang of regret as he woke up the next morning. He'd had that dream again; the one where he was Hokage, happily married to Haku. The pain quickly subsided when Naruto realized that it was time to go see his new home. He'd seen it several times before, he'd heard rumors that it was the 4th Hokage's old house, and now those rumors were confirmed.

It was located on an obscure pathway in Konoha Park, so that's were Naruto went. Thinking ahead for once, Naruto decided that it was best that as few people as possible knew where he lived for the time being. Naruto used henge and transformed into a plain-looking carpenter. He then walked downstairs to exit the apartment building. As Naruto walked down the street, a small part of him missed the admiration that he experienced yesterday, but that was of little relevance at the moment.

Naruto eventually reached Konoha Park, as he walked through it, he looked at the swings, the lake, everything. They all brought back painful memories from his child hood. Everywhere he turned, it reminded him of his early years of isolation. Fighting off kids who tried to attack or bully him, wondering why adults snatched their kids away. Sometimes it got so bad the "Neko-san" had to step in and break up the fights. Even with all the painful memories surrounding him, Naruto was able to find solace in knowing that everything that's happened to him at this point has made him a stronger person.

Naruto finally passed through the park, and walked down the back-wood pathway. It led through a grove of cherry blossom trees, and when he came out, he found a gated manor, surrounded by the red gates his mother described to him in her letter. Naruto pulled out the scroll and unsealed his key. He couldn't find a keyhole on the gate, so he looked at the note attached to the key itself. There was the message his mother left him, but he'd never looked at the other side of the note until now. He flipped it over and looked.

"Just run some chakra through this key and tap the swirl on the gate. Do the same with the front door too. ~Dad"

Naruto nodded and did exactly as the note said, and the gate opened. Naruto walked through the gate and examined the long sidewalk that lead to the mansion. The lengthy path was made red and yellow stone, and on either side there were expansive grass fields with oak trees scattered along them. Naruto was confused at the well maintained appearance of the house, gate, and yard.

"I guess Baa-chan and Ojii-san had someone take care of this place until I got old enough." Naruto dispelled his henge and strolled down the pathway, observing the tranquil beauty of the area. He reached the large wooden doors and opened them with his key. To his surprise, he smelled food. The door made a loud sound as it slammed, and then Naruto heard voices.

Out of nowhere, an army of maids and butlers came from various rooms and bowed to Naruto. Then a girl, probably only a few years older than Naruto, appeared at the top of the stairs.

She began to speak but immediately trailed off when her eyes met with Naruto's. "Welcome to your new home Namikaze-sama. I, uh... _-oh my-_."

Naruto stared back with a blank expression, waiting for her to finish her sentence, but after a few more seconds, Naruto interjected. "Hey, you alright pretty-lady?"

She narrowed her eyes and smirked for a second before reapplying her air of professionalism, Naruto felt a familiar chill shoot up his spine. "... You're quite the charmer."

Naruto's eyes widened slightly, he gave her a blank expression. "I am?"

Mitsuki nodded, holding that same smirk. "It's just... I can tell you're being sincere. That's not very common among most guys, try not to change, okay Namikaze-sama?"

Naruto nodded and allowed her to continue.

"... I can understand that you're probably confused right now. We were commissioned to maintain this house for you two years ago. You'll find that the Namikaze estate is fully staffed for your comfort. We cook, clean, and even provide security for you." When the girl said security, the maids and butlers all took out their forehead-protectors and showed them to Naruto. She continued; "My name is Mitsuki Tachibana, and any requests you have for the staff can be relayed through me."

Naruto blinked. "Thanks. I'll go get my things and move-" Mitsuki put her hand up and stopped Naruto. "We'll handle that." Mistuki wolf-whistled and 10 butlers disappeared in swirls of leaves.

"Please, make yourself at home, Namikaze-sama." Mitsuki smiled warmly at Naruto. It was then that he took a second to really look at her. She had medium-length black hair, it was slightly wavy, giving her a wild, yet elegant look. She also had an extremely natural-looking bronze complexion, but her most distinguishing features were her neon green eyes, Naruto could swear to himself that they were glowing. Mitsuki's sharp features along with her clothes marked her as a ninja. She was wearing black ninja pants with white ankle wraps and black boots. She wore a kunoichi's halter-top, and also had a long navy scarf adorning her neck. Naruto looked at the scar on her chest and followed it all the way to her shoulder, which had an ANBU tattoo on it.

"Mitsuki-san. What did you do before this?" She placed her hands behind her back and took a breath.

"You can't already tell, Namikaze-sama? I was ANBU... at least until Orochimaru attacked about three years ago... those days are behind me now though."

"I mean... what was your specialty as an ANBU?"

"I specialized in assassination and recon for a few years, but then I switched to being an assault specialist... which is right up your alley, judging from what Hokage-sama has told me."

Naruto looked at her quizzically. "Years huh? ... How old are you anyway? Judging from your appearance, you can't be much older than I am."

Mitsuki gave Naruto a strange look; he couldn't quite assign a specific emotion to it. "It's impolite to ask a girl her age Namikaze-sama."

Naruto raised his hands in a placating manner. "Oh! I didn't mean anything by that! If you come with the house I figure we'll be seeing a lot more of each other from now on so-"

"If you really must know, I'm 21."

Naruto cocked his head slightly and grinned. "For real? You just act a whole lot more mature than you look, that's all... That's the reason I asked."

Naruto cleared his throat and turned to look at his staff, they gradually stopped performing their duties to listen in on what he was going to say.

"Hey guys! You all can go home for the weekend when the others bring my things over, pass that on to anyone who's not here!" The staff nodded and continued their duties, Mitsuki descended the stairs and walked over to Naruto.

"Namikaze-sama, what do you wish to do with your old apartment?" Naruto looked at her and realized that she was notably tall for a woman, likely 5'10" or so, she stood about an inch taller than the jinchuuriki. He thought for a second and then took middle road in terms of action.

"I'll keep it, just move out everything important, and I'll sort it out on my own."

"Understood." Mitsuki walked away and began speaking into a radio reciever around her neck in order to direct the butlers in Naruto's house.

One of the maids approached Naruto. "Namikaze-sama, would you like me to show you to your room?" He nodded in reply.

"Follow me."

She took him up the staircase and there were three hallways, one to the front, the left, and the right. She walked him straight ahead. The left side of the stark white hallway was lined with windows. Naruto looked outside and there was a courtyard with a fountain and patio, he could see some of the staff relaxing on benches and eating lunch, Naruto stared, dumbfounded at the elegance of the estate. Naruto looked to his right, the light cascaded through it's the windows, drawing attention to the potted plants and paintings on the wall. Most of them were of stuffy-looking old men with bright red hair. They all shared the surname, Uzumaki. When Naruto and the maid finally reached the end of the hallway, he saw the final picture. It was a portrait of The Bloody Habañero herself, Kushina Uzumaki.

The maid walked to the brown door and opened it, she waved Naruto inside.

"If you need anything, I'll have someone sent by in ten minutes." With that she bowed and left Naruto to himself.

He stepped into his room. It was vast and bare, with white walls. The ceiling must have been 30 feet high, and there were large windows placed near the top of the walls. The room had a warm glow to it, mainly due to the polished wood floors, and the natural light. To his right, there was a mirror that spanned the length of the room, to his left, there was a single bed, circular in shape, placed an equal distance from both walls. On the other side of the room, there appeared to be a bathroom and closet. Naruto took off his haori and placed it on the bed. He saw two pictures of his parents, one looked to be a wedding photo, and the other was of the Minato and a pregnant Kushina. Naruto took notice of a TV remote on the nightstand, and became confused when he looked at the rest of the room. Failing to find a TV in all its vastness. Naruto shrugged and pressed the power button, he jumped when several floorboards rose from the ground. A flatscreen TV was beneath them, and it flipped to Konoha's news station. Naruto nodded in approval and retracted the TV back into the floor. "I could get used to this."

* * *

Ino walked through the streets of Konoha, mainly to run errands. It's not like she needed to though, she was just hoping that she'd run into Naruto by some stroke of luck. She'd figured he'd stop by for more flowers at some point for his departed significant other. Having spoken with Sakura the day before, Ino understood that she'd eventually have some competition for Naruto from Sakura, at least when she gets it through her forehead that she loves him, but until that day, she had plenty of time. Time wasn't an issue, but Ino didn't want to wait.

Her experiences with Naruto had all been rather limited, there was that one mission to the land of noodles she had with him. If her memory served correctly, she was a body double for Princess Fuku, the whole thing turned out to be a waste of time anyway, mainly because Naruto blew their cover and somehow solved the problem at the same time.

"Meh… none of that matters now anyway."

Ino continued to walk down the street, eventually she realized that she'd subconsciously led herself to Naruto's apartment building, she'd gone there before to wake him up when they went on their mission together.

Ino nearly fell flat on her face, she didn't have a legitimate reason to be there, so knocking on his door would get awkward. Especially because of what Sakura had told her about Naruto. The guy was a walking lie detector, according to her best friend, he could just tell. Ino thought for a second, and eventually, she came up with something that would work. She jumped to the nearest roof and quickly sprinted back to the flower shop and grabbed the same type of bouquet she recommended to Naruto the day before. She wrapped it in plastic so that it wouldn't be ruined when she sprinted back to Naruto's apartment.

Having reached her destination for the second time, Ino walked into the building and waited to catch her breath before going up the stairs. She reached his door and knocked. "Well, if he's not here." Ino pulled a pen out of her purse and wrote on the bouquet's card.

"_Naruto I'm sorry about your friend. Here are some more flowers for when the other ones wither. Just keep these in sugar water until you need them. If you need anyone to talk to, I'm perfectly willing to listen._

_~ Ino Yamanaka"_

Ino read over the card one more time, and prepared to leave it on the doorstep, but then she figured she should knock one more time for good measure. Just before her knuckles hit the door, it began to open. Ino's heart sped up and she began to speak.

"Hey, Naruto? … This is the right house isn't it?" She looked confused as ten men carrying boxes walked out, the first nine ignoring her. The tenth stopped and addressed Ino.

"You're looking for Naruto Uzumaki?"

"Yes. I wanted to give him these." Ino motioned to the flowers.

"We're just moving his things out... one moment." The man stopped and listened to someone on his earpiece.

Ino looked at the man worriedly. "He hasn't been evicted or something, has he?"

The man shook his head. "Oh heavens no! We're merely moving his things to his new house!"

"Oh. Well could you give these to him for me, since he's busy with moving in and all?" Ino handed the flowers to the man, but he refused them.

"Please, gifts are best given in person. Follow me… you're a ninja correct?"

Ino nodded.

"Then we can take the rooftops, much quicker than the streets, no?"

"Sure." Ino smiled, but inwardly groaned at more high-speed travel. She'd done plenty of sprinting across roofs in the past 15 minutes.

She followed the black clad man over roofs, toward the more expensive side of Konoha, Ino was beginning to become impressed. Naruto must have gone on some crazy S-Rank missions to be able to afford this part of town. After all the jumping, Ino and the butle landed in Konoha park, next to the lake. It was pretty this time of year, all of the cherry blossoms were blooming.

Ino began to stare at the lovely sight, but then she realized that the mysterious man began to walk down a deteriorated trail that looked all too familiar. "But that's where the 4th Hokage lived."

Ino eagerly followed the man until they reached a red gate with a gold swirl on it. He tapped the swirl and the gate slid open, he motioned for Ino to follow him. Ino looked around, dumbfounded at the beauty of the estate. The vast emptiness of the front yard save for a few trees and the house itself, made it strangely relaxing to look at.

The man led Ino through the front door, and she was startled by the liveliness of the house. Butlers and maids were walking all through the foyer, idle chit chat and greetings peppered Ino's ears. The man she followed whistled and a maid came over, he told her to take Ino to see Naruto.

The maid looked Ino up and down. "Are you Nami- … Uzumaki-sama's girlfriend?"

Ino muttered under her breath. "Not yet…" She looked back up at the maid and gave a less obvious answer. "Not exactly, we're just friends."

The maid smirked at Ino knowingly. "Good luck." She motioned for Ino to follow her up the stairs. Ino was taken aback at the beautiful simplicity of the grounds, she noticed on her right, some familiar pictures she'd seen in her history books… the Uzumaki Clan! … "I always thought it was a coincidence that Naruto's last name was Uzumaki. He doesn't look it at all."

The maid looked back at Ino as they walked toward a brown door at the end of the hallway. "There are many things about Uzumaki-sama that aren't common knowledge."

The maid knocked on the door. "Uzumaki-sama? You have a visitor."

A muffled voice replied soon after. "Come in!" The maid opened the door and walked in with Ino.

"Hey Ino!" Naruto waved and smiled.

Ino flushed a bit, as Naruto wasn't wearing a shirt. He was standing on a small pedestal in the middle of the large room. The maid smiled coyly at Ino and shut the door.

"Hey Naruto. I brought these in case you needed more flowers for… her. The first bouquet should keep for a few more days."

"Thanks!"

"No problem." Ino stared at Naruto absentmindedly, her eyes tracing the scratches, scars, and other muscles on his body, the way the light hit him on the pedistal made him look rather statuesque. Several dirty thoughts ran through her head. "What are you doing?"

Naruto thought for a second and scratched his head. He turned to the far side of the vast room and yelled. "Mitsuki-chan!"

Ino's heart jumped into her throat when she saw a beautiful girl walk out of Naruto's closet, her wild black hair only drew attention to her lime-green eyes, piercing in their brightness. She was carrying something red and white and handed it to Naruto. She looked at Ino quizzically, and then smiled.

Naruto talked to her. "What exactly are we doing again?"

"It's called hemming. Now put this on."

"Yeah, sure."

Naruto put the haori on, and Ino's heart jumped into her throat… again. He looked **exactly** like the 4th Hokage in all the pictures of him. It all made sense now, why he was living in this house, why there were always ANBU near him when he was a kid. He was the-…

Why is she touching him like that?!

Ino's heart jumped into her throat for a 3rd time when Mistuki also stepped on top of the pedestal. She was standing rather close to Naruto, close enough for her breasts to press against his chest. Mitsuki failed to notice the slight tint of red on Naruto's face as she was pulling the measuring tape behind his back. She finished measuring the Haori in relation to Naruto, and in one swift motion, she'd taken the coat off of Naruto, exposing his upper body. She took one last set of measurements for his torso, brazenly touching him all over. Naruto continued to blush, her soft hands touched his entire torso with surgical precision, he could feel her breathing the rise and fall of her chest was especially obvious as her own pressed against his.

Ino was annoyed and worried at the same time, she'd never seen this girl before, yet over the span of a day, she was able to get this close to Naruto. With all her experience in acting, Ino was able to hide her annoyance, well, most of it.

She smiled and introduced herself after Mitsuki stepped off the stool.

"Hi! I'm Ino Yamanaka!" She offered Mitsuki her hand.

Mitsuki took it and replied. "I'm Mitsuki Tachibana." She paused and smirked. "So, what's _your _relationship to Uzumaki-sama."

Ino's eye twitched at the emphasis on _your, _and how's she get off calling him Uzumaki-sama_? _It's like she was mocking her.

"Eh? We're friends." Ino worked up her courage and completely readied herself to look like a fool. "What's your relationship with Naruto-kun?"

Mitsuki's extremely bright eyes made Ino freeze as they stared at each other. Mitsuki's expression was blank, and after a pause, she spoke. "I'm his escort."

"Escort." The word echoed through her head over and over. Ino smiled menacingly. She had to restrain herself from punching Mitsuki, but then she looked at Naruto, who was as confused as ever.

"Eh? You're my escort? I don't need a bodyguard."

Mitsuki sighed. "...You ruined the joke, Uzumaki-sama." Mitsuki's demeanor switched to business mode instantly. "As I said, I'm Mitsuki Tachibana, I'm the staff director at the Uzumaki estate, and personal aide to Naruto Uzumaki. I also serve as his bodyguard… not his escort."

"Nani? Then what's an escort?"

Ino piped in. "Don't worry about it Naruto." Ino was relieved. This Mitsuki girl and Sakura may have constant access to Naruto, but the green-eye goddess was duty-bound, and Sakura was too stubborn to understand her feelings.

"Hey, Mitsuki-chan? Can you put these in some sweet water?"

Ino corrected Naruto. "Sugar water."

Naruto corrected himself. "Oh… Sugar water?"

Mitsuki took the flowers from Ino and walked to the door. She bowed and smirked at Ino, "Good luck!" Ino's eye twitched again, this girl had to be trolling her.

Ino turned to Naruto, and was reminded of her earlier revelation.

"Naruto? Just who exactly are you?"

Naruto looked at Ino, she seemed trustworthy enough, besides, she could read his mind if she wanted to.

"My name is Naruto Uzumaki. Sole surviving member of the Uzumaki clan, and son of the Yondaime Hokage." Naruto shut his eyes… but then they burst open and he started yelling.

"BUT I REFUSE TO LIVE IN THE SHADOW OF MY PARENTS! I'LL MAKE MY OWN MARK ON THIS WORLD DATTEBAYO!"

Ino jumped a bit at his sudden outburst, but was calmed down when she really took notice of how much muscle Naruto put on over the past 2 and a half years. She stared, fantasizing of dirty things, at least until she heard Naruto begin speaking again.

"Oi Ino! I'm going out to eat, wanna come?"

Ino looked at Naruto and raised her eyebrow. "Only if I get to choose the place."

Naruto pouted for a second, and finally agreed.

Ino nodded and went into her purse for her hand mirror, she pulled her hair tie off and swung her hair. She fluffed her locks and let some hair cover one of her eyes so that it gave her a more exotic look. Ino looked in the mirror, satisfied, she put it back in the purse. Then she took her black skirt, and hiked it up so that it was just past halfway between her knee and hip. She rolled the waistband down to match the appearance of a miniskirt, and allow her midriff to be seen when she made her final adjustment. She took her baggy white t-shirt and pulled on the neck until she heard a satisfying pop. She let go and her cleavage was visible. She then tied a knot with the bottom of the shirt, it allowed Naruto to see her well toned stomach. Ino pulled her forehead protector from her purse and tied it around her neck. She smiled.

Naruto, stared, dumbfounded, as Ino went from unremarkable to head turning in about 45 seconds. "So, where are we going, Ino-chan?"

"Maybe you should put a shirt on first, or… actually, feel free not to."

"Heheh. Yeah! I'll to that." Naruto walked into his closet on the far side of the room

Ino walked over to the wall length mirror and put on her makeup, she smirked and mused to herself. "All I need is three dates, just three." She deviously giggled to herself, the hairs on Naruto's neck stood on end.

"Eh? It's that feeling again… Whatever."

* * *

Ino's got a plan in store, and Naruto's got his work cut out for him! Remember to follow, fave, and review. I need my motivation.

~ Breath of the Wiz

_Signing Off_


	8. Chapter 8: Ino Makes A Move

AN: Sorry for the wait. I had to plan out the next section of the story so that this doesn't turn into one of those plotless smutfests that plague most fanfiction. It's cool, because since I've gotten past the obligatory inheritance chapters, this is officially the first relevant chapter to the story. Don't worry, chapter 9 will be up in a more timely manner (the next few days to be less vague), so without further adieu, let't see what Ino's got planned for Naruto.

* * *

"Where're we headed, Ino?"

Ino grabbed Naruto's hand and began to pull him behind her. "We're going to my favorite sushi bar."

Naruto smiled and patted his stomach with both hands as it growled. "I could do sushi right now."

As they walked to the front door, the staff of the Uzumaki Estate bowed as Naruto and Ino exited the building. As the two teens approached the gate to the cherry blossom grove, Ino noticed Naruto becoming apprehensive.

She prodded. "What's wrong, Naruto?"

"Well uh... We should think of some disguises for when we walk in. I tend to attract a bunch of attention wherever I go for some reason."

Ino gave Naruto one of the warmest smiles he'd ever seen; warmer than Haku even. She laughed a bit as she talked; "I think it's cute that you don't understand why that is!"

Ino looked back at Naruto, reassuring him as they began to exit the grove. "Give me a sec, I'll think of something, we may not even have to use henge."

Naruto sighed and nodded. They walked in silence for another 5 minutes and came to the exit of the park. Naruto looked at Ino in anticipation for her idea. Ino turned back at him and beckoned.

"Come here, Naruto." Naruto complied and walked over to Ino. She looked up at him and wrapped both her arms around one of his, pulling Naruto close.

"This should be enough to keep your fan club off us, no henge required."

"Oh! They'll think you're my girlfriend or something!" Ino nodded and pulled him along, she looked up at Naruto and warned him.

"You gotta meet me halfway on this. If you don't sell the ruse that we're an item, people will pick up on it and disregard the fact that I'm on a "date" with you. Got it, Naruto?"

Naruto nodded; "Yeah… hmmm." out of nowhere, he stopped Ino and kissed her on the forehead.

She froze; the street froze, everything, be it animal, or human, stopped in its tracks.

The girls on the street stared in surprise, and jealousy, especially since Ino wasn't exactly the nicest to Naruto when they were kids. Ino twitched a bit, mainly at the suddenness of Naruto's actions, but things like this were to be expected, especially from the #1 most unpredictable person in Konoha.

Even though Naruto had rather awkwardly moved into it, Ino had to resist the urge to maneuver him downward into a real kiss. She took a deep breath, and laughed to herself as she hugged Naruto.

Naruto appeared genuinely confused. "Did I mess up? That's what boyfriends are supposed to do, right?"

Ino smirked up at him and poked his chest. "You're fine! ... You'd better watch out Naruto, I might ask you to do that for real next ti... What's that on your neck?"

Naruto's eye twitched. Ino noticed and examined the mark closer.

He tried to deflect, but to no avail. "Oh, uh! Nothing in particular!"

"... IS THAT A HICKEY?! Naruto, who gave you that?!"

He muttered beneath his breath. "... Crazy snake lady."

"...Oh. Anko-san." While outwardly calm, Ino's heart didn't just jump into her throat, it leaped into the top of her skull. She turned pale and started shaking as she asked a second question.

"Naruto? W-what else did she give you?" Ino wanted to cry, Anko could easily steal any man from any woman that she wanted. If Ino needed three dates, Anko just needed a 5 minute conversation.

"As far as I know, just a hickey." Naruto's hairs suddenly stood on end as he felt a chill run through his body. He used his free hand to check himself and noticed a slip of paper in his pocket he unfolded it and read.

_I've got a surprise for you, Naru-chan. Bring bandages!_

_~ Anko-sensei_

Naruto's thoughts snapped back to how he and Anko met, and his skin went cold as he started to shiver.

Ino looked at Naruto's rather unreadable expression and discreetly read the slip of paper, looking more horrified with each word. She and Naruto began to look around frantically. They both checked behind themselves and saw the back of a very familiar trench coat. Without stopping, Anko looked back at Naruto and smirked as she licked her lips with her… _abnormally long_ tongue. She appeared to be headed toward the Hokage's tower.

Ino unconsciously tightened her hold on Naruto's arm as they watched her retreating form disappear into the crowd.

"Naruto, I don't think I can protect you from Anko-san."

"It doesn't matter, this has gotta be just a joke to her."

"I seriously doubt that. Didn't you see how she was looking at you?"

Naruto gave a bashful shrug. "Meh, I know she gets a kick out of scaring me. It can't mean anything."

Ino relaxed a bit and let go of Naruto. He jumped a tad when Ino pinched his cheek as she spoke. "I'll let you figure it out Naruto. I think it'd help if you came to understand it on your own"

Naruto prodded the platinum blonde for more information. "Come on, Ino! You're talkin' like it's obvious, it's making me feel stupid."

"Well, I'd label it more cute than obvious." Ino laughed looked deep into Naruto's eyes as she smiled, this made Naruto blush a little. "Don't worry about it, Naruto-kun."

Ino inwardly thought to herself. '_It won't matter. I have it all figured out, even __**with **__Anko-san after you. Just three "dates".'_

Naruto felt reassured for some reason, so they continued to walk down the street hand in hand, turning heads of men and women alike. Ino had a huge smirk on her face; everything was going according to plan, Anko notwithstanding. She deliberately chose this sushi bar because it was on a crowded intersection, Ino wanted to make sure as many people as possible saw them. She didn't even like sushi, but the fact that she was on a "date" with Naruto, and the guarantee that he would be playing along made it all worthwhile. The entire point of this outing was to create a buzz.

Naruto tensed a bit as they walked past a women's clothing store, girls started to file out as the "couple" passed. Ino mouthed "don't worry" to Naruto and pushed her breasts into his arm, he tensed even more. This caused Ino to smirk at the jealous females as she gave them a spiteful flip of her hair.

Naruto looked on in awe as there wasn't a single word said to him by any girl as they walked toward their destination. Ino was stunning, though she'd only had about 45 seconds to get ready for a date, nobody would have been able to tell unless they saw exactly what she did. The village girls, be they ninja or civilian, piled on top of each other at the entrance of the clothing store. They stared in downtrodden silence as Naruto and Ino walked toward their destination. Naruto's sharp ears could hear their whispering.

"How do I compete with her?"

"That's Ice-Queen Ino, of course she'd get to him first."

"He's mine as soon as she kicks him to the curb."

"Why's everyone go after _her_ first?"

"Oh, so the one guy she _doesn't _turn down just _has _to be him?"

Naruto looked down at Ino, whose mind was elsewhere at the moment, so he chose to break the silence.

"I take it you're even _more_ popular with guys now?"

Ino postponed the planning of "Operation: Naruto" for a moment to answer the question.

Ino exhaled and nodded. "Yeah. I'm not even going to be modest. It's kinda funny actually. I have my pick of whomever I want, but every guy I like is either taken or has… _**different **_preferences. Of the two guys I've dated since you left, both of them just saw me as a conquest, so I cut them loose rather abruptly… guess that's how I got my nickname."

Naruto grabbed his chin. "I _think_ I understand. Sort of."

Ino looked at the crowd of girls following Naruto and herself. "You'll be in my position in about a week, you'll understand then."

Naruto's stomach growled. "Hey! That's the place right?"

"I believe so."

* * *

Sakura's day wasn't exactly going as planned. She'd always found it weird that Naruto garnered as much attention as he did from such immensely powerful people. From the day she learned that Jiraiya was training him for the chuunin exams, to the moment she learned that he was responsible for bringing Tsunade back to the village.

Now, Tsunade wanted to talk to him, and it's apparently so Important that not even she could hear about it. It was funny that Sakura had known Naruto for so long, yet had known nothing about him. She'd been to his house, she'd been to the training ground, even Ichiraku's ramen stand. Not a single trace of orange.

Sakura reflected on her conversation with Ino the previous day, almost crying in embarrassment as she described how she'd fainted in front of all those people. And then how she threw Naruto out with a bogus excuse, Ino just laughed the whole time. _"Told you so!" _She really did tell her so, when Ino,_especially Ino, _says that someone is hot, it's usually an understatement. When someone was capable of meeting the "_Ice Queen of Konoha's_" expectations, you listened. Sakura didn't and she payed for it. Ugh, Kakashi and Naruto would never let her live it down.

She walked down the main street, hoping to the gods that she'd run into Naruto today. She was a little worried in fact, especially considering that when she used her key to Naruto's apartment, it was borderline empty. There was almost nothing, even the beds had been stripped. She'd wondered if he moved out, but some of his things were still there, so that couldn't be the case.

As Sakura aimlessly walked down the street, she noticed a line of women wrapping around the corner, and coming down the dusty street toward her. As far as Sakura knew, there weren't any sales on hot new fasions or anything else stereotypically girly, believe me, Sakura would have known. In fact, she'd have been first in line.

Sakura's ears twitched when she heard the word "Naruto". She practically ran up the street and around the corner. The line was coming from a sushi bar, and between the line and the other women fighting to get to the window, there wasn't much to see.

"Naruto must be eating in there."

'_**SHANNARO! GET THOSE BITCHES AWAY FROM HIM! HE'S MIIIIIINE!'**_

Sakura shook her head. She'd started speaking her mind ages ago, her inner persona shouldn't even have existed anymore.

'Where'd that come from? I thought I was done holding in my true thoughts and emotions.' Sakura thought to herself in confusion.

'_**Eh? **__**YOU'RE SO DENSE!'**_

Sakura inwardly frowned. 'I'm not lying to myself, so what _IS_ that?!' She considered going to get examined for schizophrenia, but finding Naruto came first. She walked up to the crowded entrance and yelled.

"OI, GET THE HELL OUT OF MY WAY!" The girls all jumped and parted to allow Sakura to see the door. She saw several waiters and waitresses trying to hold the door shut. Sakura walked up to the door and smiled as she daintily tapped on the glass.

"I need to get in. It's official ninja business. You can let me in, or I'll let myself in."

The staff wisely let Sakura pass, but immediately shut the door behind her. The next thing Sakura saw annoyed her, to say the least. Ino was feeding Naruto hosomaki rolls. This was supposed to be Sakura's day off, and her master summons her for work at noon, and here Naruto was stuffing his face, and _Ino _was stuffing it for him.

Sakura wrinkled her nose. "Piggy-chan? Why're you here?"

Ino didn't look up as she popped another sushi roll into Naruto's mouth.

"Naruto offered to take me to lunch, so in return, I'm playing his girlfriend for the day to keep the local fan club off him. Open wide!"

Naruto opened wide and swallowed the roll whole.

"Oi baka! Chew your food!"

"Hey Sakura-chan! Did you come to eat too?"

"No. I'm here to tell you that Hokage-sama wants to see you ASAP."

Naruto stopped looking like a chipmunk when he swallowed the remainder of the sushi.

"Oh thanks! Oi Ino, this'll be enough to cover for both of you if Sakura want's something too." He dropped some bills on the table and stood up from the booth. Naruto effortlessly picked Sakura up by the shoulders, as if she were a small child. Sakura took a sharp breath as her cheeks turned a bit pink at the sudden contact and weightlessness, reminding her of the day before.

"I need to get past, Sakura-chan."

"Oh. S-sorry."

Naruto then turned to the side and plopped her down.

Naruto gave her a hearty smile. "Have something to eat, I insist."

Naruto looked great, especially with the way the light was hitting him. Sakura went into a full on blush as Naruto walked to the door.

Luckily he didn't see it, he was currently staring at the restaurant staff, they were still trying to hold the door shut. He sheepishly scratched the back of his head, and used a shunshin to go to the Hokage's Tower.

Sakura looked at Ino suspiciously as she sat down. "What're you planning, Piggy-chan?"

Ino smirked. "Let me lay it out for you, Forehead."

* * *

Next up: Anko's surprise, and Ino's analysis of Sakura's character flaws. Many laughs and plenty of Drama to come!

_~ Breath of the Wiz_


	9. Chapter 9: A Yamanaka's Fury

AN: DBTiger63, thanks for asking these questions. I've given the facets of the story you mentioned in your reviews a bit more thought. Orange Flash is going to bounce between comedy, drama, and action. These first 8 chapters were more for testing the water with the characters and my comedic timing. I can understand that the pacing is a little slow, so I'll pick it up. Also, I hope that this chapter will answer some of (not all of them, that's for later) your questions about Naruto and his obliviousness, even though he spent 2.5 years with Jiraiya. Let's get going.

* * *

Tsunade was thumbing through some paperwork while Jiraiya stood in front of her desk, she was too busy working to realize that he was staring at her cleavage.

"So uh, why exactly did you summon me?"

Tsunade didn't look up as she answered Jiraiya. "Two things really. I never got a full report from you on Naruto's progress, mainly due to his… obnoxious entrance into my office. I'll need more details since he doesn't want to be evaluated."

"Right. I'll be honest; I didn't take his training too seriously for the first year or so. I'd just give him something to work on for the day, and then I'd check his progress."

"Hands off training... You were at the brothels the whole time, weren't you?"

Jiraiya puffed out his chest. "You know me too well, Tsunade-hime."

She crumpled a sheet of paper and tossed it into the trash bin behind the Toad Sage. "Keep it brief, we only have a few minutes."

"'Till what?"

"One thing at a time, Jiraiya. What happened next?"

"Well, he asked me if I could help him more effectively utilize the Kyuubi's chakra, so I loosened his seal a tiny bit."

Tsunade stopped working and looked worriedly at Jiraiya. "That was a bad idea I assume?"

"Yup. He drew too much the first time, and gave me this." Jiraiya poined to a spot on his chain mail, upon closer examination, Tsunade could see through the links. There were claw marks scarred into his chest.

"I was able to stop him before he reached any nearby villages, but that was only the beginning. After I loosened the seal, that foul chakra was constantly leaking and mixing with his own in far greater quantities than before."

"He seems fine now."

"He only got it under control about two months ago. The Kyuubi would often take over his body at night and run off, ever since I loosened the seal, he said that it can freely speak to him, even in his sleep. That's why we had to stay in the wilderness for the past year and a half, as a result… his social skills got a little rusty."

"As if Naruto-chan ever had any… So, what other complications were there?"

"He happened to have just hit puberty when I loosened it, so there's a good chance the fox will alter his growth, I'll let you know if I catch on to something strange."

"Last thing Jiraiya. In terms of jutsu and other new abilities, what have you to say of his overall improvement?"

"With some liberal abuse of Shadow clones, I was able to teach him some wind release techniques, but I can only teach the brat so much, seeing as my elemental affinities are for earth and fire. I'll have to find someone else to teach him."

Tsunade scratched her head. "Wind? That's rare in this village… I'll look into it later. Have either of you made any progress on deciphering the seal to the Hiraishin?"

"I gave him the two Kunai Minato left to me specifically for that purpose. I can't crack it, so maybe a pair of fresh eyes will make more progress on it. Hell, he's already figured out how to _**use**_ them, only a matter of time before he can preform the jutsu on his own. Oh, I almost forgot! We've also been working on a way to combine elemental chakra with the Rasengan, but we haven't had much luck with it."

A voice suddenly came from the windowsill. "I've also attempted to complete the Rasengan in such a way."

Tsunade swiveled her chair around and sarcastically addressed the young man. "Nice of you to join us, Kakashi-kun."

Kakashi eye smiled. "Sorry about the tardiness Hokage-sama, a black cat crossed my path and-"

Tsunade smirked. "It's fine, I told _you_ 10 o'clock, everyone else I told to be here at 12:30, your actually early."

Kakashi chuckled as he scratched the back of his head.

Jiraiya spoke to him. "Makes sense that you'd know the Rasengan too. What'd you learn from your attempt?"

Kakashi casually formed a Rasengan in his hand as he spoke. "It's the reason I came up with Chidori, I couldn't combine them, the jutsu becomes unstable as soon as you add other forms of chakra to it. If there were a practical way combine them all at the same time, it'd probably work."

Kakashi clenched his hand and the glowing ball dispursed into the air. "Maybe shadow cl-"

Kakashi train of thought was interrupted as Naruto… ugh, _fucking Naruto_, brazenly kicked the door in.

"OI BAA-CHAN! WHAT'CHA NEED?" Much like the day before, the trained killers in the room reacted just as you'd expect of them. Kakashi rolled his eye, and Tsunade threw her desk(again). Jiraiya was hit square in the face by the mahogany furniture, and was launched toward the closing door, and Naruto. Between Jiraiya and the desk, Naruto didn't have much room to dodge, so he just decided to cut his losses and eat it.

Jiraiya hit Naruto, they hit the door (which flew off the hinges), then they hit the elevator door, then the desk hit _them_… and exploded…

Anyway…Steam was coming off of Tsunade's forehead as she stomped over and pulled Naruto's head out of the indentation in the elevator door. She lifted him by the back of his haori as she made her trademark Scary Face.

Her voice boomed throughout the entire top floor. "I'm _also _taking this out of your next paycheck. Now sit down, and shut up, am I clear?" She threw him at the couch and went back out to pull Jiraiya out of the elevator door.

Naruto landed with his face stuck between the cushions, his voice was muffled as he asked a question. "Oi, Kakashi-sensei, why're we all here?"

"Special mission I'd assume. I would go buy supplies after this if I were you."

"Awesome!" Naruto jumped up from the couch and cracked his knuckles.

Tsunade, visibly frustrated, dragged Jiraiya back into the room and dropped him on the rug. She noticed Naruto standing up, looking anxious, so without breaking stride, she flicked his forhead protector. There was a loud ping, and Naruto was sent flying back into the couch. He dislodged his head from the cushions once more and pouted as he sat down.

Tsunade exhaled in exasperation as she spoke. "The others should be here in a few minutes."

Jiraiya, now fully recovered from his minor concussion stood up. "Why are we here again? _I lost my train of thought." _Jiraiya narrowed his eyes at Tsunade and Naruto respectively.

Tsunade put a finger over her mouth and motioned around the compromised room. Kakashi hopped off the windowsill and closed it, and Jiraiya picked the detached door off of the floor and awkwardly placed it back on the hinges, but if fell off after Jiraiya turned to face the Hokage. He just shrugged at her in response.

Tsunade plopped down in her chair and face-palmed. When she looked back up, she was dead serious. "My spy network has informed me that Orochimaru and Sasuke are operating in Wave Country. However, they haven't reported in since Naruto's come back. I'm sending you all to investigate."

Kakashi spoke up. "Hokage-sama, you said there'd be others, who else are you sending with us?"

Naruto also voiced his opinion. "I think Sakura should come with us."

Tsunade put her hand up in protest. "I've thought about it, and I beleive she'll be an emotional liability if I were to send her with you. I know enough about her relationship with Sasuke to say so with certainty. I assure you, it wasn't an arbitrary decision."

Naruto stood up. "But! It would-"

Kakashi gestured to get Naruto's attention and quieted the young ninja with a shake of his head. "It's too dangerous to have her with us. It's risky enough bringing you."

Tsunade concurred. "Exactly. The others should be here any-"

Perfectly on cue, Mitsuki opened the door… which then fell off the hinges again. She looked back and forth between the Hokage and the door as she walked into the center of the room. Jiraya stared at her ass the whole time.

"My apologies Hokage-sama, but I believe that the door was broken before I arrived, likely due to the remains of a desk in the hallway... and the destroyed elevator. I had to take the stairs."

Kakashi mocked the raven-haired woman. "Mitsuki, you're slipping, I got here before you did."

She smirked at Kakashi and bantered back at him. "It doesn't count if you were supposed to be here two hours ago. I'm aware of how people get you to be somewhere on time, Kakashi-taichou."

"Eh? Mitsuki-chan, how do you and Kakashi-sensei know each other?"

"That's a story for another time, Namikaze-sama."

Kakashi looked surprised for a second. "So Naruto knows who he is now?"

"I maintain the Uzumaki Estate and also serve as his bodyguard, Kakashi-taichou."

"So this is what you've been doing since you withdrew from ANBU."

"And you've been keeping an eye on Namikaze-sama since you retired."

Tsunade interrupted the reunion to get everyone back on task. "Now, if our other addition would show-"

This is when the window shattered and Anko came flying in, everyone except Tsunade remained motionless… Tsunade threw her chair in the direction of the sound.

Anko deftly dodged the chair and landed on her feet, the chair on the other hand… continued to sail out the shattered window. A shriek, laden with pain echoed from the streets below.

Anko mused as she picked Tsunade up in a bear hug. "That's not very nice, Tsunade-Nee-chan."

"Not now Anko." Tsunade pointed to the couch next to Naruto, Anko didn't even protest, she got excited in fact.

Naruto turned pale as Anko sat across his lap and greeted him with a pinch on his cheek, she whispered in his ear.

"It's a shame you wore a shirt today, _Naru-chan_… Did you happen to get those bandages yet?"

Tsunade drew everyone's attention. "I've called all of you here just in case any of you have objections toward the personnel of this team."

Naruto to tried to speak but Anko shoved his face into her cleavage, so no one noticed.

Tsunade continued.

"Good then. I've carefully chosen each of you based on your knowledge of Orochimaru and Sasuke respectively, and also because of your given skillsets. Shikamaru is also going with you; he'll meet you at the main gate in one hour. NOW GET THE HELL OUT OF MY OFFICE BEFORE I BREAK SOMETHING THAT BELONGS TO **YOU **THIS TIME!"

* * *

_*Somewhere else in Konoha_

Ino smirked at Sakura. "How do you feel about Naruto, Forehead-chan?"

"He's a great fri-"

Ino cut her off. "Friend? That's great… because I'm attracted to Naruto, and I'm going to steal him from you."

Sakura frowned at her lap. "Two things, first, Naruto's not my boyfriend, and second; that's pretty shallow, Piggy-chan. Are you going through with all this because you think he's cute?"

There was a long pause as Sakura adjusted her gloves, waiting for Ino's reply. It came, but it wasn't what she expected to hear.

"I should ask you the same question about Sasuke, you fucking hypocrite."

Sakura quickly stood up in anger, prepared to slap Ino across the face, but when she saw her friend's expression, she froze in terror. Ino didn't make that face unless she was about to _really_ tear into someone.

Ino took a deep breath and glared at Sakura as she spoke in a deceptively even tone.

"Yes, I think it's cute that he loves you more than you can comprehend. I think it's cute that Naruto loves you enough to waste his time chasing a lost cause of a man, _**just**_ because it would make you happy. I think it's cute that he dedicated his existence to your happiness. So yes, **_I FIND NARUTO CUTE_**!"

The staff in the restaurant began to stare at the two kunoichi, but Ino didn't care. Sakura tried to stop her, hoping to point out that this wasn't the place to do this sort of thing, but the ball had already begun rolling.

Ino's voice wavered in frustration. "I would kill for someone who could love me that way, and I'd love him right back. You don't seem to understand, people only see me as a trophy, a conquest; do you know who _wouldn't_ do that? Naruto. I've been around sixteen years, and up until today, I've only ever chased after one guy before. Know who that is, Sakura?"

Sakura answered under her breath. "Sasuke."

"And how much of a shit did he give about any of us?" Ino paused to let it sink in.

"Naruto on the other hand gives **too** much of a shit, and of all people, it has to be about _**you**_! **WHY YOU?! IT'S SO STUPID!** He's the most good-natured and loyal guy in the world, I could tell that much since **_before_** the Chuunin Exams ended!"

Ino took a deep breath to calm herself, but it didn't seem to work.

"I'd have been chasing him three years ago if he weren't so immature at the time, but look at him now. Naruto doesn't just look different, he's matured as a person. I don't have to wait on him anymore! Naruto has everything that I want in a partner, physical appearance aside!"

Ino paused and took another breath, but she appeared to get even angrier when she continued to speak.

"We both know how important he is to you, but what I don't get, is why you're letting him waste his time like this! Do you really love Sasuke that much? Have you even asked Naruto what he truly wanted to do?... If there were no promise, what would **he** want to do about Sasuke, ever think of that?"

Ino stood up and scowled down at Sakura, her voice was full of vitriol.

"When I visited the Sasuke Retreival Team in the hospital, I saw Naruto's Jacket hanging in the corner. There was a hole in it, about the size of a fist. We both know what did that, but just to make sure, I took a peek at Naruto's short-term memory. I saw their fight… all of it."

Sakura was beginning to tear up. "I-Ino… i get it okay, just-."

The blonde slammed the table. "I don't think you do. SASUKE TRIED TO KILL HIM! DO YOU REALLY LOVE THAT TRAITOR ENOUGH TO LET THAT SLIDE?!"

Sakura just stared at the table, there was a long pause.

"Answer me! I just want to understand what's going through that big forehead of yours!"

Sakura just sat there, trying desperately to hold herself together. Ino picked up on this and calmed down.

"If someone here is shallow, it's you, Sakura. I can't forgive you if Naruto gets himself hurt over this, or even worse... killed." With that, Ino promptly left the restaurant, she just wanted to go somewhere, away from both Sakura _**and**_ Naruto.

Sakura's tears were starting to flow as she watched Ino storm out. She managed to keep it together as she used the bills on the table to pay for the food, after which, she went on her way.

When Sakura got home, she plopped down on her bed, and cried her eyes out.

**_FIN_**

* * *

Thanks for reading. The second half was difficult to write, and I may tweak it a bit, but I think I conveyed Ino's frustration at Sakura's hypocrisy as needed. Next time there's going to be some action, and even more drama as Anko delves into Naruto's reluctance to accept a woman's affections(kinkiness aside. :D).

~ Breath of the Wiz


	10. Chapter 10: Chasing Ghosts

AN: Chapter 10. Most of the girls will be out of the picture for a while, so this short arc (3 more chapters **at most**) will focus on developing Naruto's relationship with the older women in this love-dodecahedron (In case you haven't been paying attention, that's Mitsuki and Anko). For now, let's get the ball rolling.

* * *

The Investigation team hastily set out to prepare for their mission. Naruto used shunshin and appeared in his room, a look of determination adorned his face. He went to his nightstand and pulled his father's Kunai out and stabbed it into the bedpost. He reached his finger through the loop, and like that, he was on a very familiar hill. Naruto looked around, he could feel a darkness looming over the peaceful fishing village, everything, from the trees in the distance, to two graves behind him felt eerie. He stared at Haku's marker for a moment, but his mind snapped back to his promise to Sakura.

Naruto cracked his knuckles and plucked the Kunai from the ground, and in a yellow flash, he was back in his room. He put the matching 3-Pronged Kunai on his bed and went into his closet, where Mitsuki had recently moved his things.

Naruto stripped down and grabbed a mail vest. He pulled it on and then fished through the closet for his lucky orange shirt. He pulled the long-sleeved tee over his head, and checked the seals woven into the left sleeve. All of the weapons and camping supplies were accounted for, so he looked for the rest of his Ninja attire, chiefly the armor plates for his torso. On the shelf above his clothing, he saw a box with the 'NON-WASHABLE' on it. He hopped up and snatched it off the shelf and rifled through it. He pulled out his forearm guards and slipped his hands into the attached gloves.

Mitsuki poked her head in the doorway and wordlessly tossed Naruto his orange ankle-wraps and his flak jacket, Naruto smiled in reply as she disappeared back into the spacious bedroom.

Naruto was about to walk out of the closet, but he saw his black Haori on the floor. It was inside out, and he noticed that it was reversible. The other side was exactly the same, save for the coloring and the kanji on the back. It was white, with the same orange flames licking the bottom, and the golden kanji inscribed in the spiral said _'Foxy'. _Naruto would have laughed, but A booming voice ruined the idea.

'_**I like it… You do take after me a bit. Huh Kit?'**_

'_Eh? Shut up.'_

'_**Or what?'**_

Naruto sighed and addressed his freeloading inner-demon as he walked out of his closet.

'_I'll muzzle you again!'_

'_**I haven't said anything in quite some time, what's got you on PMS?'**_

'_I enjoy having my thoughts to myself from time to time. Reminded me of when you couldn't talk to me at will.'_

'_**What could it possibly be that has you so pumped up? It's kind of annoying.'**_

'_The hell? Like you can talk about annoying! Why do you even care?'_

'_**First, you're the only thing I can interact with. You won't mate with any females for reasons unknown to me. I can feel my intelligence ebb away with every passing hour, and you haven't done anything worthwhile in the past two years. That's a long time, regardless of life-span, especially when you're trapped in another body. So yes, you've forced me to take at least some level of interest in your social life, it's the only form of entertainment I have.'**_

Naruto scratched his head and replied to the demon. _'Okay. Well, I have an S-Rank mission to investigate sightings of Orochimaru and Sasuke.'_

Naruto could feel the demon's chakra spike as he laughed and clawed at his cage. _**'Are you gonna let me come out and play? HAHAHA! I CAN'T WAIT TO RIP THAT SLITHERING FOOL TO SHREDS! YOU'RE BOYFRIEND IS ALSO ON THE GUILLOTINE!'**_

Naruto shook his head. _'That's why you __**can't **__come out and play, you damned fox.'_

The Kyuubi's booming laughter echoed through Naruto's skull. _**'We'll see about that, Naruto.'**_

Naruto frowned as the Kyuubi's roaring laughter faded into silence. He walked over to his bed and pulled his sleeveless haori over his flak jacket. He stared at the matching three-pronged-kunai on the bed, and put them in his thigh holsters. Ready to leave, Naruto used shunshin and appeared at the front gate. He was still 20 minutes early, so he opted to go to the ninja equipment store and buy some explosive tags, he would need them should the need to fight Sasuke arrive.

* * *

Sasuke groaned as he was awakened from his nap for the 4th time. He was lying on the roof of a hidden cabin, he wanted to catch some sleep before he resumed his training, but the old snake was busy torturing (and likely experimenting on) a leaf spy he captured.

Sasuke could care less if it weren't for the fact that the man's constant screaming was keeping him awake. Sasuke cursed as he hopped down and opened the door. He passed Kabuto, who was sharpening his scalpel on the kitchen table, and went into the basement.

"Oi, Orochimaru."

The pale man turned around, slightly annoyed, as he seemed to really be enjoying the torture session.

"What is it, Sasuke-kun?"

"Is there really any point in torturing this man?"

Orochimaru gave Sasuke a patronizing smile, his shiny fangs made Sasuke feel unsettled. "Why the sudden bout of compassion, Sasuke-kun?"

"I'm trying to sleep."

"Oh. Well, I've had my fun." Orochimaru slowly turned to the writhing man in the chair, he made Sasuke twitch when he abruptly snapped the leaf ninja's neck.

Sasuke, stared at the twitching body in mild disgust as he asked another question. "Why did you bring me to Wave country if we're not even staying in Kirigakure? This is a fishing village."

"If you really must know Sasuke-kun, we're going to steal the Kinjutsu scroll from the Ninja village. Staying in close proximity to the target would be… problematic."

"We didn't have to stay in a place with such horrible accommodations, this house doesn't even have a bed. The only thing in this entire village worth a thought is the bridge, which I almost died on a while back."

Orochimaru laughed. "We'll make our move in due time Sasuke-kun. For now, we must figure out what to do about the reinforcements that the leaf will inevitably be sending since I was unable to catch all of this poor man's friends." He gestured at the still twitching body.

Sasuke considered the possibility that Tsunade would send Naruto and Jiraiya after him, surprisingly, he was somewhat interested in fighting Naruto once again. The Uchiha sauntered out of the basement and gave Kabuto a sideways look. Sasuke asked a question, it was the same question he'd asked every day since he'd defected to the old snake for training.

"What's for dinner?"

Kabuto didn't even look up as he inspected his other ninja tools. "Foodpills."

"Fuck."

Sasuke would be going into town for food that day.

* * *

Naruto had been browsing the effect tags for kunai for 15 minutes until he noticed a tuft of hair sticking out from behind a shelf in the back. He grinned and yelled, much to the annoyance of the other ninja in the building.

"OI SHIKAMARU!"

The tuft of hair jumped and Naruto could hear a small laugh.

Shikamaru walked out from behind the shelf, holding some smoke bombs. "What's up Naruto!"

"I hear you're on the mission with us!"

"Yeah, the Hokage wanted my recommendation on personnel for this mission. I don't know who this Mitsuki person is though, the Hokage added her to the team."

"She used to be ANBU with Kakashi, she's also my bodyguard now."

"Bodyguards? You gettin' soft Naruto?"

Naruto punched Shikamaru in the shoulder. "Not on your life Pineapple-Head!"

Shikamaru exhaled as he rubbed his shoulder. "Troublesome… We can catch up on the way to Kiri, for now, pay for your stuff and we'll meet everyone outside. Five minutes 'till we leave."

Shikamaru exited the store and Naruto grabbed some explosive tags, some smoke tags, and some expensive ones labeled 'Lighting Rod', apparently it would absorb chakra from Raiton techniques.

Naruto turned to an older ninja in the store.

"Do these work?"

"Sometimes ... I think they're from Kumo."

"Okay, Thanks."

Naruto purchased his tags and exited the store. As he walked to the gate, he could see the team materializing. He looked at Anko, who was twirling some bandages around her finger. When she noticed Naruto's gaze, she winked at him. Naruto turned a little red and cleared his throat as he walked over to the group, everyone excepting Kakashi and Jiraya appeared to be present.

Naruto was about to ask, but Jiraiya appeared in a swirl of leaves, carrying Kakashi like a sack of potatoes. Kakashi was reading his porn and didn't appear to notice or care that he was literally being carried along.

Shikamaru spoke first. "I assume we all know each other?"

The group nodded, and Shikamaru looked toward Mitsuki.

"You're Mitsuki right?"

She nodded.

"What kind of Jutsu do you specialize in?"

"Genjutsu and taijutsu."

"Any trumph cards or secret techniques?"

"It's a surprise."

"Fine, but we did need a genjutsu specialist. Once we reach the Great Naruto Bridge, I'll give further details."

Jiraiya spoke up. "Naruto Bridge?"

Kakashi hopped off of Jiraiya's shoulder and closed his book as he answered the Toad Sage's question.

"Team 7's first real mission was to ensure the completion of that bridge. Naruto was instrumental in said completion, so the people named it after him."

Jiraiya smiled at Naruto, who was still buried in Anko's cleavage and ruffled his hair. "I learn something new every day, you failed to mention that one, Gaki."

Naruto wasn't struggling, it was this, or another hickey, but it's not like he was complaining. Whatever scent Crazy Snake Lady was wearing smelled pretty good. Anko let Naruto go after a few more seconds and began to walk toward the gate.

"That's enough standin' around! Let's go!" With that Anko jumped to the nearest tree branch and waited for everyone else to follow suit.

Naruto straightened his haori and cracked his neck. "You heard her! Let's get movin'!"

As the team blasted through the tree tops, Naruto thought about the early days of Team 7, back when things actually made sense.

"Sasuke-teme, I'm dragging you back here this time whether you want to or not. Sakura won't have to cry over you any more, dattebayo."

* * *

The retreival team sprinted from tree to tree at a breakneck pace, trying to cover as much ground as possible before sunset. As they were chasing the disappearing sun, Jiraiya was the first to question the frantic pace of travel.

"Shikamaru, we're a recon team, right?"

"Correct."

"At this rate, we'll be in wave by sundown. I figure it would be better for us to avoid Orochimaru until we have a plan. It's likely he'd be hiding in the fishing village next to the bridge to make escaping an easy task."

"I know, I just want us close enough so that we can move into the village at a moments notice."

After several more minutes of jumping, Shikamaru saw the bridge peer over the horizon, to his right, he spotted, about 3 miles to his right, a tiny clearing in the forest. He pointed to it and issued his orders.

"We'll set up camp over there!"

Naruto thought for a second. "Shikamaru, I know someone who'll take us in!"

"Not today. We can't risk getting spotted in the village until it's absolutely necessary."

The team made it to the clearing and caught their breath for a few minutes until Shikamaru started speaking again.

"Set up camp and we'll discuss the plan for tomorrow."

The six ninja set up some tents and a camp fire. Naruto sat in his tent as he began unsealing kunai from his sleeve seals. He spent several minutes attaching the explosive and smoke tags to the kunai, but he miscounted the number of seals he bought at the store. He used up all his kunai for the smoke and explosive tags and didn't have enough left to test the lightning rods on. Naruto crawled out of his tent.

"Oi, Kakashi-sensei!" Kakashi appeared in front of Naruto.

"Yo."

"I need you to test these lightning rod tags for me."

"How?"

"Can you shoot lightning at it or something?"

Kakashi raised his eyebrow at Naruto.

Naruto's puppydog eyes watered. "Pleeeeeeeeaaaaase!"

Kakashi sighed and pointed. "Fine. Stick it to that tree and we'll see what happens."

Naruto jumped over to the designated tree and stuck the tag to it and ran behind Kakashi. The rest of the camp began to stare in their direction as Kakashi started sparking with electricity.

"Are you gonna use Raikiri on it?"

"Not exactly."

Kakashi pointed at the tag and the Raikiri leapt off of Kakashi's hand. It appeared as a hound made of pure lightning and in a flash, it crashed into the tree with and explosion of electricity. The tag appeared to suck the cloud of electricity into it and began to glow shortly afterward. Kakashi raised an eyebrow in amusement and shot another hound at the seal, which again, absorbed the attack. Seconds later however, the tag burst into flames and the released electricity fried the tree to a crisp.

Kakashi held his chin. "So they store electricity until they overload? Interesting, where'd you get these, Naruto?"

Naruto shrugged. "The store next to the gate sells them, apparently they're from Kumogakure."

"They'll be useful if you have to fight Sasuke."

"Yeah. That's what I thought, but I don't have enough Kunai for them."

"Sorry Naruto, I can't spare any. Maybe you could just attach them to your flak jacket and Haori? If you have enough, they may not explode on you."

"Good idea!"

Shikamaru and Mitsuki got up from the fire pit and walked over to Naruto and Kakashi.

Mitsuki stared at the tree as she talked. "Those would be even more useful if it weren't for the exploding part."

Shikamaru looked at Naruto. "Naruto, could you give me one of those?"

"Yeah, sure." Naruto handed one to Shikamaru, and he walked over to his tent. Naruto noticed Mitsuki was staring at him, like she was expecting something.

"What is it Mitsuki-chan?"

"Anko's nowhere to be found, just thought I should let you know."

The blonde sighed and shrugged. "It's fine, she likes to mess with me, but it's never anything too bad."

"Anko doesn't joke around Namikaze-sama, you'd better mentally prepare yourself for whatever she has in store for you."

Out of nowhere, the Kyuubi interjected. **_'If you screw this up, I'm going to TAKE. OVER. YOUR BODY.'_**

_'Huh? Just shut up for a second, I'm in the middle of a conversation!'_

"Can't you do something about it? ... Oh, I know! Pretend to be my girlfriend or something!"

"Namikaze-sama, even if I did do that, it wouldn't matter to her. I suggest you just let this happen, it's kind of... inevitable."

"Eh? Let what happen?"

Mitsuki grinned. "You'll be fine! She just wants to suck your blood!"

Naruto twitched. "Wait what?!"

There was a long pause while the two shinobi stared at each other, Mitsuki's face began to contort until she burst into a laugh, however, she was able to speak relatively clearly.

"Namikaze-sama. She likes you, just talk to her for more than thirty seconds."

_**'Fucking moron.'**_

Naruto inwardly pouted in embarassment. _'... Shut up!'_

Naruto looked back and forth between Kakashi and his bodyguard until Kakashi face-palmed."Naruto. Consider it part of your training... for facing uncertainties. This experience will... round you out a bit more, make you more... aware."

_**'And less socially inept. You're like the retarded cub that the mother leaves to die.'**_

_'T-that was... cold... even for you... Maybe Kakashi-sensei will understand!'_

Naruto stared at Kakashi, quizically, obviously wanting to ask what was going to happen. Kakashi shook his head and gave a bored; "... This is really not my problem." He then went over to the camp fire to heat his food up.

"Namikaze-sama, as your bodyguard and caretaker, I'm ordering you to spend some time with Anko-san, it'll be good for you."

Naruto's big blue eyes watered as he pleaded to Mitsuki. "If whatever this is will be good for me, can't you teach me instead? ... I trust you more."

Mitsuki turned a bit red in the cheeks for a moment as she thought Naruto was serious, but after several seconds passed, she realized that Naruto had no idea what he was talking about. The green-eyed ninja gasped, and fake-swooned. "Oh, Namikaze-sama, what would the maids say?!" Mitsuki chuckled some more as a gust of wind blew by, it ruffled her wavy and wild hair, her neon green eyes sucked Naruto in as she looked at him. She somehow failed to notice Naruto gawking at her smiling face.

"Heh." The blonde unconsciously smiled back.

Naruto was snapped out of his thoughts right then when Mitsuki pinched his cheek. "You're great Naruto, but right now, I'd prefer to keep our relationship professional, but thanks for offering."

Naruto's face snapped into confusion. "Nani? I don't unders-"

She sighed. "Like I said, just go see her. Believe me, you'll thank me later."

Naruto nodded and looked at Anko's tent, she poked her head out, when their eyes met she smirked at him and motioned for him to come over to her.

He was afraid, very afraid... in a good way of course...

* * *

AN: Anko's gonna make use of those bandages next time, and without Mitsuki protecting him, Naruto's in for an educational night. It's needless to say that his ability to read social cues has deteriorated(it's debatable whether or not he ever had that ability to begin with.), and Anko's going to do some serious educating, that's for sure. Until next time.

~ Breath of the Wiz, _Signin' Off._


	11. Chapter 11: A Night To Remember

AN: Here it is ya perverts... *Update* Lemons removed due to popularity of story. Orange Flash has caught the eyes of the Mature Content hit squads on FF. For the sake of the story, I've removed them, sorry for the inconvenience, but I'll attempt to push my M rating as far as possible. ***Update2* I've found a place to post the uncut chapter, scroll down and take a look at the bolded section.**

* * *

The sky was alight with beautiful stars as Shikamaru called everyone over to the campfire to issue instructions for the following day.

"Jiraiya-sama, I want you to go to Kirigaomorrow and do some digging on our missing team. After you're done looking around, notify the Mizukage of our mission, she may be able to help you. I'm sending you alone because you're the only one that would be able to deal with Orochimaru in the worst-case scenario. Everyone else, run away."

"The rest of you will look for leads in the fishing village across the bridge. Naruto and Kakashi, I want you to find out who would know about a missing ninja staying in their village. Orochimaru doesn't operate in Wave Country, so he has to have a contact here. Anko and Mitsuki, I want you two to find _**us**_ some contacts, anybody that you'd deem useful."

"Now, any questions?"

Mitsuki raised her hand. "If we encounter sound ninja, should we kill or capture them?"

Shikamaru though for a second. "We only need one sound ninja, so if you capture a group, pick out the one that would know the most information and do as you wish with the rest."

Mitsuki nodded in reply.

"Anyone else? … Alright, wake up by 9:00 sharp tomorrow and get moving, Orochimaru will only be here for so much longer since he likely knows we're coming."

The group split off into their tents and went to sleep for the night.

* * *

Of course, Naruto didn't have it that easy. He had that dream again, the one where he was Hokage, and was married to Haku. Naruto, at this point, had experienced this singular dream so many times, that he would become lucid. Within several minutes, he would figure out that he was asleep, and such revelations made the image of an adult Haku, all the more painful to see. Naruto woke himself up by jumping out of the Hokage Tower window. He snapped awake just as he hit the ground and was staring at the roof of his tent.

Naruto sat there for an hour, he thought back to his chat with Anko in front of her tent just a few hours ago.

* * *

_Naruto smiled nervously. "H-hey Snake Lady. Did you need something?"_

_"Naru-chan. Are you scared of me?"_

_"... A lil' bit."_

_Anko sighed. "Relax, I'm not gonna eat you or anything! I just wanna get to know you, that's all."_

_Naruto exhaled in relief. "Oh, that's a relief... what're the bandages for then? I thought you were gonna fight me or something!"_

_Anko got a devious smirk on her face. "Quite the opposite actually... I'm gonna have sex with you, and you're gonna love it."_

_Naruto's eyes widened and he gave her a surprised smile, his face was beginning to go red. "R-really? I've never..."_

_Anko gave him a playfully pouty face. "Naru-chan, don't you want a private lesson with Anko-sensei?"_

_Naruto gave her a stupid nod._

_Anko smiled back and pinched his cheek, she pulled his ear to her mouth and whispered. "There's a small pond off that way, go there after everyone's fallen asleep. I'm gonna make you a man tonight."_

* * *

After such thoughts went through his mind, it was obvious that Naruto would have some serious trouble going back to sleep, so he got out of his tent and went on a stroll through the forest, he did want to see just what Anko had in store for him, but at the same time, he couldn't stop thinking about Haku, and how much losing her hurt him.

Despite the emotional turmoil, Naruto felt at peace for the first time since he'd gotten back to Konoha, the cool wind had a relaxing pull to it, so he followed the sensation to a small pond. He was already barefoot, so he took off his ankle wraps and stuck his feet into the cold water, he also splashed it on his face. Naruto just sat there, taking in the silence…

But then, a pair of arms wrapped around Naruto's upper chest.

"_Just let it happen." _Rang through his mind, but at this point, he didn't really care what Anko was going to do for him, or to him, or... whatever. Naruto was far too emotionally drained after everything that's happened to him over the past few days.

Anko licked Naruto's ear as a chill ran down his spine. Her sultry voice was the only sound besides the small waterfall and the rushing of the stream."

"I considered letting you get some sleep tonight, but you looked so depressed when you went off into the forest. I can fix that for you, _Naru-chan."_

"Anko-senpai?"

"Yes, Naru-chan?"

"Could I be loved?"

Anko silently unwrapped her arms and sat down next to Naruto.

"Did something happen?"

"I don't know, I'm just overall… confused. For the longest time, I was on my own. I mean, I had _some_ support, but they were always keeping secrets from me. On my first real mission here, I met a girl, she uh... she didn't make it. I know how we felt about each other, but even so, she was just like me, so she knew how painful being alone was... Afterward, I found friends, but it was still difficult. I had to prove myself to them even after all I'd been through. Why's everybody so interested in me now, of all times? What's changed? It's not like they understand me any better than Hak-... she did."

Anko took a long look at Naruto, as she thought back on her own life, she began to realize just how similar they were. She gave Naruto a hug and ruffled his hair, speaking to him as she did so.

"You know, we're a lot alike, you and I. I didn't have anyone after Orochimaru betrayed the village and left me to rot. I was the "Snake Bastard's Apprentice", no more, no less… at least until Tsunade took me in for a few years afterward… I'll be straight with you, it's not your friendship that people want, Naruto. You're an abnormally attractive young man, and on top of that, you happen to have qualities that are uncommon among most **_people_ **in general. All this attention stems from the fact that a lot of these people are beginning to see you for what you are. Awesome... Whether they're genuine or not is for you to figure out."

"Then, where do you stand, Anko-senpai? What is it you want from me? Am I a game to you?"

Anko got an unreadable look on her face and stared at Naruto. She suddenly kissed him on the cheek and whispered in his ear.

"Let me show you my answer Naru-chan."

Anko's hand traveled down to Naruto's belt and tapped it a few times with her nail. Despite his tan, he turned pink and stripped down to his boxers. Anko moved in to kiss him, but Naruto was caught off guard when she lifted him off the ground and flipped him. In midair she yanked off his boxers and slung him through the night air and into the pond.

Naruto launched out of the water and landed back on the bank, where Anko was nowhere to be found.

"OI! What's the big idea?"

Out of the shadows, Anko zoomed along the ground and tackled Naruto, her trench coat and skirt were in a pile next to his clothes.

"Stop playing games with me! What do you want?"

Anko straddled Naruto and stared at him with that same unreadable expression. She slowly, and deliberately, took off her fishnet shirt and threw it in the pile of clothes.

Anko pressed her ample breasts into Naruto's shredded torso and started kissing him. Naruto's body was on autopilot at this point, he simply kissed back, it was heavy, warm, and wait, what's she doing now?

Anko leaned back and pulled Naruto on top of her, her panties somehow disappeared, but Naruto could care less where they... whoa.

Anko cooed in Naruto's ear as he lie on top of her.

"_Naru-chan. I want you to _**destroy**_ me."_

The Kyuubi gave of a roar full of blood lust and uh… lust. _**'YOU ARE **__**NOT**__** SCREWING THIS UP, KIT! SPLIT. HER. IN HAAAAAAALF!'**_

* * *

Jiraiya's eyes snapped open and he bolted out of his tent. He whipped his notepad and pencil out and zoomed through the trees in the direction his "pervert senses" pointed... that and he could feel the Kyuubi's chakra.

Mitsuki heard the running and the following rustling of trees, so she decided to confirm.

"Anko-san?"

No answer.

"Uzumaki-sama?"

No answer.

"Jiraiya-sama?"

Still, no answer.

Mitsuki laughed to herself and put her head back on her pillow. Anko was going to make Naruto a man that night, and it would be entertaining to see the changes when he comes out of that forest.

* * *

Anko's words rang in Naruto's ears over and over as he started to shake and glow red.

_Destroy me. _Naruto could feel the lust and aggression sweeping over him in waves.

'Dammit! What're you doing?!'

'_**It's been over 15 years since I've gotten any. I'm plugging in to your nervous system!'**_

Naruto tried to stop it, but he couldn't concentrate enough, and within two seconds, Naruto's rational thought centers were overrided by the blood lusted chakra.

For the first time in a while, Anko was genuinely scared for her life. She knew that Naruto was the Kyuubi's Jinchuuriki, and it was glaringly obvious that he was losing control, but there was something really hot about the thought of it.

Anko wrapped her legs around Naruto's waist and held on for dear life, Naruto's red eyes were locked on hers, and she moaned when Naruto bit into the crook of her neck, she clawed bloody tracks into his back in response.

* * *

**~~~~SECTION-REDACTED~~~~ **

**DEAR READERS,**

**IT SEEMS MY STORY HAS BECOME POPULAR ENOUGH TO FORCE THE MA HIT SQUAD OF DA WEBSITE TO NOTIFY ME OF MY BREACH OF POLICY. I DON'T WANT THIS STORY TO BE TAKEN DOWN, SO THE EXPLICIT CONTENT HAS BEEN CENSORED FOR THE SAKE OF THE STORY AS A WHOLE. I'LL LATER FIND SOME OTHER OUTLET TO REPOST THE REDACTED CONTENT AND PERHAPS WILL BE ABLE TO GET SOME SORT OF MA RATING FOR ITS STORIES SO THE ORIGINAL CONTENT CAN BE RESTORED. UNTIL THEN, I HOPE YOU GOT TO READ THIS SECTION BEFORE ITS UNFORTUNATE ASSASSINATION. MY APOLOGIES READERS.**

***UPDATE* You can now find the uncut chapter on adultfanfiction. The story's under the name; The Orange Flash: Lost Chapters. My pen name on AFF is as follows; Breath_of_the_Wiz**

* * *

Naruto fell on top of Anko and stared at her twitching and moaning form. Anko could see the aggression in his eyes turn to fear as red turned to blue.

"Anko-senpai! I'm sorry, I-I didn't mean t-!" Naruto cut himself of when he heard Anko giggle like a little girl, it was sort of disturbing.

Anko could barely speak as she was still having convulsions from her orgasms. "Oh my god, Naru-chan! That wa- ah… That w-was -gah dammit!- amazing."

Naruto panted. "It, felt good… About my question earlier."

Anko hopped up and tried to kiss Naruto, but she convulsed in mid jump and accidentally tackled him. Her coordination was failing her at the moment, but she just laughed it off.

Anko managed to get some more words out, even through her moaning and twitching. "Yeah… you -ahn!-destroyed me alright... I've been trying to show you that I'm physically attracted to you, but... I think you get it now. Truth-god!-... Truthfully, I don't have much time for a relationship with _any_ guy right now. However, -ah!- since you can do **that**, I will **make **time for you. We're sexually compatible, that's obvious enough, but I can't commit to you in any way unless I-damn!- understand where you are emotionally."

Naruto looked at Anko for a few seconds. "I don't quite know either. Anko-senpai-"

Anko flicked Naruto's nose. "Call me Anko-chan, you've earned it."

"Anko-chan, my heart's in too many places right now, I'm not sure if I'm ready to move on."

Anko kissed Naruto on the nose. "I'd ask, but I don't like to pry… I'll wait for you, little boy. If you ever need someone to talk to, _or_... to keep you warm at night, call _**me**_first."

Naruto jumped when Anko gave his crotch a squeeze. She then leapt into the pond to wash herself off. As Naruto got up and left, Anko grimaced as she looked at his back, she whistled and tossed the bandages at him.

"Use those for your back… Sorry."

Naruto nodded and smiled as he slipped his clothes on and went back to his tent, he gave the chuckling Jiraiya an odd look. As soon as Naruto's head hit the pillow, he was out like a light.

Jiraya was sitting at the camp fire, furiously scribbling in his note pad. Naruto's was a fuckin' gold mine, there was no one better, no one!

* * *

AN: Now that Naruto understands...stuff, we can get on with the more important things... like the fact that Orochimaru and Sasuke are located only a short trek away, or the fact that Sasuke's sick of foodpills. You know, important shit.

'Till Next Time.

~_Breath of the Wiz, Signin' Off._


	12. Chapter 12: Reunions I

Sorry about the loooong ass absence... But the Destiny Beta is incredible and the final release is gonna revolutionize the industry. But you're not here to listen to my thoughts on videogames right? Hope not! This is the chapter 12 Extended Cut, to make up for my relatively long break. Let's go!

* * *

"Oi, Naruto."

Kakashi was crouched above a snoring Naruto.

"Naruto-kun."

Still, Naruto seemed to be deeply engrossed in his dream. Kakshi groaned and slapped Naruto on the forehead, or so he thought. Naruto's ninja reflexes kicked in and he caught Kakashi's hand in a death grip, Kakshi half-heartedly tried to free himself from Naruto's grip. After several seconds, Kakashi sighed and gave Naruto a small electric shock… okay, more like a tazer shock, which was more than enough to wake him up.

Naruto jolted awake, the hundreds of volts coursing through his body caused his muscles to contract. Of course, Naruto let go of Kakashi's wrist, but he also leapt a hundred meters into the air, taking his tent with him. Naruto came down in a heap, the tarp wrapped around his body. Naruto pouted as he nursed a small bruise on his forehead.

"Oi! Kakashi-sensei! What was that about?"

"It's 9:00, Naruto. I let you sleep in, we have to get moving."

"Nani? Why'd you let me sleep in so late?"

"Well, I decided to let you rest, I'd assume that a night with Anko-san would be rather… taxing."

"How'd you know? I was too far away for you to-"

"She was smiling all morning and stealing glances at your tent, that, and you smell like each other today. I can put 2 and 2 together."

Naruto's ears twitched as he looked at Kakashi suspiciously. "Who else knows?"

"Everybody except Shikamaru… and he'll probably figure it out on his own. You know… Anko-san could really help you with your girl problems."

Naruto wistfully looked off into the sky. "Girl problems huh? … It's obvious to me now, you know? … The fact that this can only get worse before it gets better. I'm actually kinda… scared."

"You're a lot smarter than people give you credit for Naruto. I think you'll figure this out."

Naruto stood and shook the remains of his tent off his body, he was about to reply, but his stomach growled. Naruto grinned and scratched the back of his head.

"So uh, what about breakfast Kakashi-sensei?"

"Eat a foodpill."

Kakashi turned around and used a water jutsu to put out the campfire. As the hissing of the steam subsided, he looked over at Naruto, who was pouting.

Kakshi's half lidded eye rolled as he tried to appease the teenager. "If you're still hungry after we find leads, I'll treat you to whatever you want. Let's get going."

Naruto flipped over to Kakashi and exclaimed. "Alright, let's do this, dattebayo!"

Naruto and Kakashi disappeared in a swirl of leaves.

They reappeared in a back alley in the fishing village. Kakashi then transformed, out of the plume of smoke stepped a white-haired sailor with an eyepatch and a straw hat. Naruto looked at kakashi and thought for a second, his face lit up and he transformed into a female version of himself.

Sailor Kakashi stared at 'Naruko' for a second. "Really?"

Naruko pouted and transformed into Mitsuki in a plain dress and blouse. Kakashi frowned at Naruto.

"Mitsuki and Anko are too attractive to keep low profiles, what would they transform into Naruto?"

Naruto smiled and changed back into himself, except, he appeared as he did when he was a genin. Naruto then changed his headband to that of a Kiri Mist ninja's, and altered his hair, face, and ninja clothing enough so that he was unrecognizable.

"They'd be something scary or off-putting! Like ninja, or gangsters! The people in this village probably all know each other, but if we're mist ninja, they won't ask any questions."

"Exactly." Kakashi transformed into a masked Kiri Jonin, he lifted his headband to reveal his sharingan, and as the tomoe spun, the eye changed from red to black, to match his other.

"Hey, I thought you couldn't turn that off."

"I can't, It's genjutsu. I want to be able to pick out sound ninja if I have to."

* * *

Sasuke was walking down the street, not as himself of course, but as a merchant he saw a few years ago. Saying he didn't miss his previous life would be a total lie, Sasuke was tired of having to look over his shoulder day in and day out, be it for hunter-ninja or Orochimaru himself. Sasuke was well aware of what he was walking into when he left, but he had a mission to complete, and until then, he'd kill himself before Orochimaru stole his body.

Sasuke was jarred from his thoughts as two mist ninja brushed past him, the older of the two stared at him for a couple of seconds and raised his eyebrow as he left to catch up to his genin.

Sasuke, supremely suspicious, almost went for his sword, but Orochimaru would probably chew him out for causing a scene. Sasuke religiously kept his distance from the old snake for the past 2½ years unless he wanted to learn something, he wouldn't be changing his ways any time soon. Sasuke continued to stare at the retreating ninja in suspicion until he turned and continued his errand to buy some fish for the night. Sasuke now knew he'd be looking over his shoulder for three things instead of two, at least for the duration of Orochimaru's plan.

* * *

After walking for a few minutes Kakashi suddenly piped up. "Orochimaru's in this village."

"Eh? How do you know?"

"I just saw Sasuke."

Naruto turned and stopped Kakashi. "… Shouldn't we follow him!?"

Kakashi cracked his neck and looked down at the 'mist genin'. "I expected a more… impulsive reaction from you. So you understand that we can't risk a fight in the middle of the street?"

"I know! I'm just tired of this Sasuke business hanging over my head."

Kakashi looked at Naruto and patted him on the head. "You'll run into him when the time is right. For now, we're going to the red light district."

Naruto's eyes narrowed as he stared at his teacher. "Eh? Why?"

"If you want information, you work from the bottom up, so we start with the seedier areas of town."

Naruto looked up at his teacher. "Is this where you went when we were learning the tree climbing technique?

"Yup. I have a contact that may know something about an S-Class missing ninja staying in their village."

"How are we doing this?"

"You'll see."

"Whenever you say that, you make me do something I won't like."

"Like I said, you're a lot smarter than people give you credit for."

* * *

A man was running down the street, but accidentally cornered himself when he ducked into an alleyway. Mitsuki judo-flipped him into a wall before he had time to regret his decision to turn that way.

The man squeezed his head in fear. "Alright, I'll answer your questions! Just don't kill me!"

Anko and Mitsuki were disguised burly fishermen as they stared down at a pathetic looking shell of a man as he began to spill his guts. His name was Zori, a former swordsman for hire under the employ of the late Crime Boss, Gato. It was by sheer luck that he'd survived the uprising caused by Team Seven 3 years ago. Now, reduced to begging in the street, Zori had taken up work as a lackey for the new crook in town.

"I used to work for Gato! But when Zabuza killed him, another guy stepped in!

Mitsuki knelt down and patted the man on the head as she flatly threatened him.

"Now, I need you to tell us which types of crime this new man is involved with… otherwise…" Mitsuki looked back at Anko. "My associate here will take over, and I'll be stuck scraping you off of the walls, neither of us want that, correct?"

"What? Y-you both know what'll happen to me if I say anything! I can't tell you that!"

Anko grabbed Mitsuki's shoulder and gently moved in front of her as she released her henge.

Zori's eyes widened as he noticed the headband and… how hot this ninja chick was. "You're a leaf kunoichi! What the hell kinda business you got with him anyway?"

Anko gave Zori a good look at her cleavage through the fishnet shirt as she knealt down and straddled Zori's legs. He stopped questioning her immediately.

Anko took off her trench coat as she smirked down at Zori. "Lucky for you, I'm in a good mood today, so I don't feel like killing you right now. A good roll in the hay would make my day even better than it already is." Anko smirked at Zori while he stared back, his eyes full of lust and confusion.

Anko sliced open Zori's obi with a kunai and began to unbutton his shirt, but stopped halfway down.

"I'm on an important mission," Anko pointed to her headband. "But a little… fun on the job'd never hurt anybody. The only thing I need from you is this man's location… tell me so we can **fuck**."

"Really?"

Anko licked Zori's ear as she whispered in it. "Like rabbits in the spring." Anko could feel a bulge in the man's pants and smirked at him. "I don't think your friend downstairs wants to wait any longer, tell me what I want to know and we can both enjoy ourselves."

Zori's drug addled mind was already impairing his thinking, but now that the blood was rushing to the head _below_ his belt, his logical thought capabilities were essentially gone.

He finally caved and answered Anko. "Alright, his name is Hayamoto, he's a Yakuza Boss. Runs the drug trade, weapons smuggling, and human trafficking on the side. He owns the boat company over on the docks as a cover."

Anko smiled. "Thanks." Zori moved to take off Anko's fishnet shirt, and smirked as her breasts popped out… Anko pinned Zori to the wall, and the 'fun' began…

Meanwhile, the _**real**_ Anko had never moved from her spot at the entrance to the alleyway. She stared at Zori in confusion since he seemed to be talking to himself. The two kunoichi watched as Zori acted out his lewd fantasy with his imaginary partner.

Mitsuki looked on in disgust while Anko was caught somewhere between revulsion and riotous laughter as she heard Zori bark commands to no one in particular.

Zori started humping the air. "Bend over and lemme suck your elbows!"

Anko continued to laugh beneath her breath at the strange druggie.

Mitsuki turned to Anko and talked to her. "Wow Anko-senpai, I didn't notice you use a genjutsu."

Anko began to laugh more audibly. "…I... haven't used any genjutsu... Aren't you supposed to specialize in that area?"

Mistuki stared worriedly and the man while he humped the air. "Anko-senpai, are you sure he's sane enough to be reliable?"

"I'm not hanging around long enough to find out."

The two Kunoichi reactivated their disguises and exited the alley. They continued the conversation on the way to the docks.

Anko slapped her stomach in amusement. "There's no tellin' what kind of freaky shit that guy was into, come on, elbows?"

Mitsuki smirked. "Speaking of freaky things… how did it go with Uzumaki-sama last night?"

Anko lecherously chuckled to herself. "Simply put, when my _Naru-chan_ finally gets hitched… I'm going to be his mistress, whether he wants one or not."

"Strange, I never pegged Uzumaki-sama as the experienced type."

"Oh, he's not experienced at all, his uh… _enthusiasm_ made up for everything else. I haven't felt like this... ever. Good sex does incredible things for you..." Anko trailed off and smirked at Mitsuki. "You don't seem like you gotten any in a while, I'll allow you one turn with Naruto. You're way too uptight!"

Mitsuki rolled her eyes. "I'm his bodyguard. Kakashi-taichou gave me a valuable piece of advice a few years ago. It concerned dating where you work; he summed it up rather bluntly when he said "Don't shit where you eat, Mitsuki.""

Anko grinned. "Ooooh, did he shoot you down too?"

Mitsuki turned up her nose and walked faster.

"Well, that's a yes."Anko muttered to herself as she jogged to catch up with the green-eyed former ANBU.

Mitsuki broke the silence after about a minute. "Anko-senpai… why settle for mistress?"

Anko stopped and put her hands in her pockets.

* * *

"I can't believe you offered me as payment for that information!" Naruto pouted as they exited the red light district.

Kakshi eye smiled at his student. "Naruto, how many men can say that prostitutes will service them for free? Even then, she wasn't really a prostitute; she was the _Madam _of the entire red light district, not just one brothel. Kudos Naruto, Anko must have taught you a lot in one night."

"So I won't catch anything?"

"Not likely… Don't tell me you didn't enjoy yourself."

Naruto conceded Kakashi's point. "Fine, I won't play blind. For someone her age, she was pretty."

"That's a gross understatement. If she knew my father at some point, she _must_ be in her late fifties."

"You never really told us anything about yourself or your father since Team 7 was formed. Sakumo Hatake, right?"

"It's nothing worth mentioning."

Naruto pouted even more, but the fact that he was disguised as a young boy made him look all the more comical, so Kakashi just chuckled at him.

"Did you at least get some worthwhile information for selling me out as a stud? Like Orochimaru's location, or a decent place to eat?"

Kakashi patted Naruto on the head. "Don't worry, I haven't forgotten my promise, you can pick where we eat now. She gave me a list of all the unregistered buildings used for the drug trade and human trafficking. If Shikamaru can narrow this list down for us, we can probably find out where Orochimaru is hiding."

Naruto grinned. "So it was worth it!"

Kakashi raised his visible eyebrow. "Worth it? You came out of top either way… No pun intended. How much is a night with an extremely experienced woman worth? As an added bonus, she looks half her age, so you get the best of both worlds. Whoever said you can't have your cake _and eat it_?" Kakashi chuckled, he loved dirty puns.

Naruto began to gag. "What if she was faking her age?... Like Baa-chan." As he lead Kakashi into a ramen stand, the Copy Ninja looked puzzled. "I don't understand, Naruto."

Naruto shuddered, but the woes of his speculation disappeared when he pulled out a menu. This ramen stand had a bunch of flavors he'd never even heard of. "Nevermind! Let's eat!"

Kakashi peered into his wallet and sighed, he'd have to make a trip to the bank when they got back. Meanwhile, Naruto looked up at Kakashi from his menu. 'I wish he'd undo that henge so I could see his fa-.'

Naruto's thoughts were cut short when Kakashi pulled his mask down and made his order with the waitress. Naruto would have been excited, but the ridiculous facial hair obscured his teacher's face. His brain continued to rattle around due to the fact that since Kakashi was under henge, the visage in front of him likely wasn't even Kakashi's real face anyway.

Naruto's eye twitched in annoyance before he relayed his excessively long order to the gawking waitress.

* * *

Shikamaru was lazily staring at the clouds when Jiraiya appeared in a swirl of leaves.

"Oh, hey Jiraiya-sama. Report?"

"The Mizukage is willing to cooperate with us, she's also beefing up security in the village."

Shikamaru scratched his head in confusion. "She? I swear, they have a different Mizukage every week."

Blood started to stream from Jiraiya's nose. "This one's a real stunner! I think I'll base a character off of her! She'll-"

Shikamaru cut Jiraiya off. "Please, I don't want to know what kind of perverted fantasies run through your mind, Jiraiya-sama. What else happened."

Jiriaya's demeanor did a total 180 as he was suddenly rattling off his accomplishments. "My contacts gave me several leads and I pursued them. All of them except one lead to dead ends, has the name, 'Hayamoto' come up yet? He's got control of the drug trade, and has some 'off the books' real-estate going. I have copies of communications between Otogakure and this Hayamoto guy."

Shikamaru shrugged. "I don't know, but I scheduled a mandatory report-in just half an hour from now. You're early, so there's no need to feel alarmed yet."

Shikamaru jumped up and sauntered into the big tent. He sat down and funneled some chakra into the radio as he flipped it to the right frequency.

Shikamaru grabbed the mic and hit the talk button.

"If you can hear this, hit the all clear button."

Shikamaru looked at a panel on the receiver. Only two of the lights came on.

"Anko, Mitsuki. Respond."

Some static came in and the sounds of breaking glass could be heard in the background as Anko's voice came through. "Sorry! Can't talk right now! In a fight!"

Shikamaru hit the call button for Naruto and Kakashi. "Naruto, Kakashi. Can you move to support them?"

"Affirmative."

"Uh. Yeah!"

Right then, Mitsuki's voice came through. "We're fine, we've… procured some intel that you'd probably like to see."

Shikamaru hit Anko's call button. "You didn't make a mess did you?"

Anko's laughter blared on the radio. "You must not have read my file very well."

Shikamaru squeezed the bridge of his nose. "Troublesome. Will anyone notice it?"

The snake woman's grin was almost audible through the mic. "That's what Mitsuki's here for! She can make anything disappear."

Kakashi piped in on the closed channel. "You want us to report in early?"

Shikamaru took a sip from his canteen. "Jiraiya-sama's back, and he has leads. I'd like to run them against your findings."

"Awesome! I'm tired of sneaking around –dattebayo-!"

Shikamaru smirked. "Bad news, Uzumaki. You're not done yet." Shikamaru's quick thinking and reflexes lead him to flip the off switch on the radio. Knowing Naruto, he was probably yelling his frustrations over the radio. Shikamaru waited a few seconds and flipped the radio back on… there was silence, and then a string of unintelligibly loud ranting.

Naruto really had changed, he was sharp enough to wait for Shikamaru to turn the radio back on.

* * *

After reconvening, the team handed in their intel. Anko and Mitsuki went directly to Hayamoto and forced him to give them a copy of his business transactions and bank account records over the past week. Kakashi and Naruto got a manifest of all the unlisted buildings in the entire village with descriptions of their uses and their unofficial owners. Lastly, Jiraiya had gotten proof that it was Hayamoto who was dealing with Orochimaru.

Shikamaru dispersed the team to patrol the village for suspicious activity while he tried to piece together the clues.

With this information, Shikamaru was able to strike 75% of the buildings on Kakashi and Naruto's list. He then used the corresponding dates in Hayamoto's bank and business transactions to find when and where Orochimaru could have likely purchased a temporary hideout.

However, the final list of possible locations would not be completed until the next morning, leaving room for things to go awry.

Naruto was walking on a familiar forest path beneath the starlit sky. He looked up and smiled as a gust of wind brushed through his hair. Naruto could feel the waves of nostalgia as he passed through the very clearing where he met Haku. He saw the tree with the fist indentation and walked over to it.

He jumped up to the nearest branch he could see and plucked one of the fruits off of it. He stared in mild annoyance at the fruit, he took a bite and held it on his tongue.

It tasted like… fucking poverty. Naruto spat the disgustingly sour fruit out and realized how hungry he was at that very moment.

'_**You smell that, Kit?'**_

'_Yup, salmon. They must be cooking.'_

'_**Who?'**_

'_Tazuna's family. I'm gonna pay them a visit!'_

Naruto walked down the path and was about to turn to go to Tazuna's house, but he'd decided to pay Haku-chan a visit first since it was close by.

Naruto reached that all too familiar hill and walked past the spot where he would place the Hiraishin Kunai when before they went back to Konoha. He walked over to her grave and knelt down.

"Hey, Haku-chan. I'm here on a mission, just like last time, except the stakes are much higher. We're dealing with some seriously dangerous people and I wanted to visit you before things get serious tomorrow. A woman named Anko taught me a lot in just a short amount of time, she helped me see that I have a place somewhere in this world. When you died, I thought that my place in the world had disappeared; I thought you were the only one that could care about me as more than a friend."

Naruto looked out onto the water as it beautifully reflected the night sky.

"I still love Sakura, more than anything in the world, but I know that my place isn't at her side. The only thing I want, is for her to be happy, so if I run into Sasuke, I'm bringing him back to her. This damn promise is way more than I bargained for though. I don't care much for Sasuke anymore, but to see Sakura smile like she used to means more to me than she'll ever understand."

"Deep down, I want him back in her life, but my pride as an Uzumaki, a Namikaze, is telling me to forget about this whole thing. Do I maintain my pride as a human, or do I squash that in order to follow my nindo? What does it make me if I can't keep both? Am I to be a pitiful ninja, or a pathetic legacy?"

'_**Kit. The only one you have to prove anything to is yourself. The only thing that validates your existence is to come to terms with who and what you are. Nobody will think any less of you if you move on with your life.'**_

'_That's the dilemma, fox. I can't live with myself if I give up. Pride or Profession, which matters more?'_

'_**This isn't something you try to figure out in one day. Let the answer come to you, don't search for it. Searching for answers too early only leads to failure.'**_

'_Thanks. Maybe you do give a shit about me.'_

'…_**Sometimes.'**_

"I've stayed long enough Haku-chan. I'll see you lat-…"

'_Oi, something seems off about this patch of grass. It's not reflecting any light.'_

'_**I'm the last being you should consult on genjutsu if that's what you're asking me. Have the green-eyed female take a look at it before you leave.'**_

'_We'll deal with this later.'_

"See you later, Haku-chan. Love you."

Naruto approached Tazuna's house with a big grin on his face. The house had been expanded since he last visited. Naruto knocked on the door, and after a long pause, it opened.

It was Inari, he'd grown several inches taller, but the most striking thing about him was the Kirigakure headband on his forehead.

"Naruto?"

"In the flesh!"

Inari squeezed Naruto into a bear hug as he questioned the long absence.

Naruto grinned and scratched his head. "Sorry, I was traveling with my master and we spent most of our time in the wilderness. I didn't have any way to send messages or anything!"

Inari pulled Naruto through the door, it was surprising how strong the boy was for his size.

"I see you're a ninja now. Tazuna-ojii-san probably wasn't too happy about that."

Inari stopped pulling Naruto. "Meh, he got over it. I'm on vacation right now, so it's a coincidence all of you stopped through at the same time."

"All of us? Did Kakashi-sensei come through here?"

"No! Sasuke's here!"

"Waitwhat?"

Naruto slowly creeped into the dining room, and there he was, sitting at the table passing fish around like it was just another day.

Naruto's eye twitched as he waited for Sasuke, Tsunami, and Tazuna to notice him. Sasuke looked up after a couple of seconds and nearly choked on his food. The two adults moved to help him but he was able to swallow the salmon before they stood up.

Inari waltzed into the room. "Hey! Look who dropped by. It's Naruto."

Naruto began to laugh at Sasuke, who's unreadable expression was completely priceless. Sasuke continued to chew his food in mild disgust.

Naruto cracked his knuckles and bared his fangs as his eyes went red. "Looks like I caught you with your pants down. How've ya been teme?"

Sasuke's Sharingan spun into view as he stared Naruto down, that all to familiar tone, laden with sarcasm was almost nostalgic.

"I've been fine, _dobe_. _Would you like something to eat_?"

* * *

Aaaaannnd, shit just got real.

Can Naruto and Sasuke sit down and have a civilized meal before they beat the shit of each other, or will they get right into it and trash Tazuna's house?

...Seriously, this should have happened in the show. Chapter 13 will be out within a week, I promise.

_Until next time!_

_~ Breath of the Wiz_


	13. Chapter 13: A Rivalry For the Ages

AN: Whew, this fight took me longer than I expected, so I'll have to extend this arc an extra chapter. I also intend to give Kakashi a _**minor**_ power boost cuz Kishi's never done a really good job of establishing exactly how strong the Copy Cat Ninja really is. He should be a Kage-tier shinobi in my opinion, or at least _slightly_ below that.

* * *

Anko sat in camp, thinking about Mitsuki's question. _'Why settle for mistress?'_ She let her back fall on the grass and stared up at the stars as she thought to herself.

'Naruto Uzumaki… mistress…'

"Oi, Kakashi."

Kakashi strolled over to Anko and sat down. "Yo."

"I need advice."

"About Naruto?"

"Yeah…"

"...Just go for it. Age is just a number."

Anko scoffed at the obvious advice. "I know that! I just,,, don't know exactly _what _our age difference will mean for a future with him. I'm not getting any younger, I'm almost 27. That's why I'm kinda… scared."

Kakashi stood up and answered as he too stared up at the sky. "Just throw caution to the wind, if it's meant to be, it'll happen. He's mature when it counts, so I wouldn't worry about a long term relationship with him. Is your biological clock ticking or something?"

Anko punched Kakashi in the shoulder and took a deep breath as she pondered his advice. Anko turned her head and stared at Mitsuki. The Snake Mistress' intuition was going off like a fire alarm as she stared at the woman's wavy black hair, her neon green eyes seemed to be glowing in the dark.

'_My gut tells me she'll be a serious obstacle at some point. The way she looks at Naruto doesn't line up with what she says.'_

Mitsuki eventually caught Anko staring at her and smiled, Anko motioned for Mitsuki to come toward her. Anko blinked and suddenly Mitsuki was sitting next to her. Anko shook her head and gave Mitsuki a wierd look.

Mitsuki shrugged. "Sorry, it's a habit."

"Give me your honest opinion Mitsuki-chan. If you were to be in a relationship with Naruto, what factor would your age have in it?"

Mitsuki pulled some grass and let if fly into the wind, she paused, and then vocalized her opinion.

"I don't think it would affect us too much, I'm only 21."

Anko coughed. "21?! I swear, I thought you were older than me."

Mitsuki began to laugh. "I thought you were younger than me! 18 or something!"

Anko gave a Naruto-esque grin. "Heh! I'm 26."

Mitsuki scratched her head in defeat. "I guess that means you'll age well." Mitsuki raised her eyebrow at Anko. "I wonder what that means for me. Do really I look that old to you?"

Anko put her hands behind her head and and plopped back down on the grass. "Relax, you don't look old, it's the way you carry yourself… I wanted to ask you what you meant by your question earlier."

Mitsuki stretched and yawned. "It's not only my job to make sure Uzumaki-sama is safe, but also that he is happy. I think you'd be good for him, so that's why I asked you."

Anko closed her eyes and smirked '_gotcha!'._ "What if the only way to make him happy is for _you_ to be with him?"

There was silence where there should have been an answer. Anko's expression became inquisitive as she opened her eyes and turned to Mitsuki. The green-eyed kunoichi was staring up at the stars rather solemnly. Anko got just the answer she expected.

"I… I couldn't do it."

Anko turned back to the night sky. "Why not, Mitsuki-chan?"

"My family has served Nam- Uzumaki-sama's for generations, it wouldn't be right for someone of my creed to become part of his family."

"Who exactly is Naruto anyway? I thought he was an orphan."

Mitsuki turned to Anko with a serious look. "Its one of those things he has to explain himself, that and I'd be executed if I told you."

"Fine. Back to my question, what's so wrong about dating someone above your class? Would you feel more regret if you married him or let him slip through your fingers?"

Mitsuki began to refute Anko, but cut herself off. Anko smirked and followed up on her question.

"Don't tell me you don't like him. I see the way you look at him, it's the same way I used to look at Kakashi and Asuma, but their hearts were elsewhere at the time… Is that it? Are you afraid his heart's off limits to you?"

Mitsuki looked down at the grass in deep thought and sighed.

"I don't know. I _really_ don't know. I'd rather not ruin my relationship with Uzumaki-sama in the long run if such an attempt does if fact, go bad."

Because she was in deep thought, Mitsuki missed Anko's psychotic smirk as she had walked herself directly into the Snake-woman's trap.

Anko was inwardly cackling to herself as she calmly spoke to Mitsuki. "I want him for myself. Promise me you'll respect the fact I'll be pursuing him."

Mitsuki smirked at Anko. "What about the 'test drive' you allowed me?"Anko frowned and Mistuki laughed. "I'm joking! You'll be great for each other."

Mitsuki stood and bowed to Anko. "I'll respect your space should he choose you, but if you hurt him..." Mistuki trailed off and went back to the campfire.

Anko flipped her hair in triumph as she began formulating a plan to remove that Ino girl from her competition. _'One down, a thousand to go.'_

* * *

Naruto and Sasuke's red eyes were locked onto each other's. Naruto's eye started twitching as he and Sasuke mirrored each other from across the room. Their heads tilted in unison as Inari tried to figure out what was wrong with them.

Tsunami looked back and forth between the two boys in anxiety. "You boys haven't seen each other in a while I'd assume?"

Naruto and Sasuke silently shook their heads while their eyes were still locked.

"Have a seat Naruto-kun. There's plenty for you too, I know how much you two can eat, you two won't clean us out this time!"

Naruto took a deep breath and his eyes reverted to their original blue. Inari sat down at the table too, leaving the remaining empty seat the one adjacent to… ugh Sasuke. Naruto gagged a bit before he pouted around to the other side of the table.

Sasuke gave a muffled 'Fuck' as Naruto sat down next to him, _very slowly_, to the point of it being awkward. Tazuna began to give a hearty laugh two boys were giving each other the stink-eye.

"Heh, you two brats are probably fighting over some girl! It's Sakura isn't it?"

Sasuke began to choke on his fish again as Naruto stared ahead like a deer in the headlights. "I… guess you could say that."

**_'That is disturbingly accurate on several levels.'_**

_'Shut up.'_

Sasuke awkwardly passed Naruto the plate of fish as they stared at each other in disgust.

"Arigat- *gag* Arigato… Sasuke."

"Hn. –cough-"

Naruto stared down at the food. "So… did you poison this?"

Sasuke menacingly swiveled his eyes toward Naruto. "In retrospect… maybe that wouldn't have been such a bad idea."

Inari looked worried. "So, you two are _still_ fighting over that Sakura girl? Things haven't changed much at all!"

Naruto ate some fish. "Well, Sasuke-teme cut her off and broke her heart. Now she's all weird and stuff."

Sasuke looked up and turned his head to Naruto. "That's just slander, Dobe. You and I both know that's _not_ how things went down."

"No, Sasuke, I _don't _know. What's up with your sudden… _EXTENDED VACATION?_"

Sasuke's sharigan eyes spun in annoyance. "I wanted to see the world, _broaden _my horizons."

Naruto bared his fans as his eyes turned red again. "I see you've picked up snake-charming in your travels."

* * *

_**'Seems like he "broadened" his asshole for that Snake-faggot too.'**_

_'That was rude and uncalled for... even for you!'_

**_'I'm sorry, but did you just ask a demon to be politically-correct?'_**

_'...No.'_

**_'Didn't think so. I'll say what I want.'_**

* * *

Sasuke aggressively chomped down on his fish. "_And you obviously haven't learned shit."_

Naruto's grin had a sadistic tint to it. "I don't consider selling my body for tutoring sessions a skill worth learning. You also need some practice with staying on task, I think you've forgotten what you were _supposed _to be doing!" Naruto again mirrored Sasuke and took an even bigger bite of Salmon.

Sasuke decided to one-up Naruto and eat a whole fish, Naruto, not to be outdone by Sasuke shoveled the whole plate of rice into his mouth. Sasuke grunted in annoyance and stuffed all of the fish into his mouth, Naruto replied by pouring the _entire _pot of soup down his throat.

Tsunami and Tazuna looked on in confusion as the two boys inhaled all of the food on the table. Inari tried in vain to grab scraps as Naruto and Sasuke's hands flashed over the dinner table, he eventually gave up and left to go grab something in town.

Naruto's features became more feral as he roared at Sasuke. "THAT'S IT! YOU, ME, OUTSIDE, NOW!"

"Gladly!" Sasuke yelled and grabbed his sword from a corner of the room and the two boys stomped out the door.

Tazuna looked back and forth between the table and the open door. "THE FUCK AM I GONNA EAT?"

* * *

Jiraiya's hair stood on end as he felt a sharp spike in the Kyuubi's chakra, the feeling disappeared a few seconds later as Jiraiya felt his hearbeat speed up.

Jiriaya asked. "Shikamaru-kun, has Naruto come back from patrol yet?"

"Nah, I haven't seen him for a while… Kakashi-san, could you look for Naruto?"

"-huff-...Yeah." The silver-haired man disappeared in a swirl of leaves.

* * *

Naruto and Sasuke were facing each other, 20 feet apart.

"Why must you go to such lengths to bring me back to the village?"

"I'm not doing this for you, teme."

They simultaneously drew their swords, Sasuke took a defensive stance while Naruto just stood there. Naruto lowered his center of gravity and charged Sasuke, who would have seen this if his sharingan were activated.

As far as Sasuke could tell, Naruto was instantly in his face, about to sever his left arm with an orange ninjato.

Sasuke fell backward and kicked Naruto high into the air as he activated his Sharingan.

"Looks like you've gotten faster, Dobe!"

Sasuke jumped up to follow up on his attack with a slash across Naruto's Stomach, but Naruto flexed at the last second and the blade bounced off his skin. Sasuke's eyes widened in confusion as Naruto grabbed Sasuke's sword arm and attempted to slam him into the ground as they fell.

Sasuke was unable to break Naruto's Iron grip so he zapped Naruto with some electricity and Naruto let go. They landed on their feet a decent distance away, so Sasuke began flashing through handsigns. **"Gokakyuu No Jutsu!"**

Naruto growled as he began to glow red and charged the monstrous fireball. There was a thunderous explosion, and out of the smoke, flew Naruto no worse for wear. He continued on his course toward a smirking Sasuke.

Naruto aimed a punch at Sasuke's head, but Sasuke caught his fist and used the Jinchuuriki's momentum against him. Sasuke grabbed Naruto's arm and slammed him into the ground as he ran lighting chakra through his sword.

Sasuke attempted to stab Naruto through the stomach again, but Naruto blocked the attack with the broad side of his sword, which then seemed to vibrate. Suddenly, Naruto's blade glowed orange and sucked the lightning chakra out of Sasuke's blade.

Sasuke did a backflip as Naruto jumped up, but before Naruto could charge Sasuke again he noticed the explosive tag at his feet. Naruto laughed to himself as the explosion rocked the forest clearing.

Sasuke narrowed his eyes at the dust cloud as he waited for a diversionary attack to come from the smoke. Just as he thought, a Fuma Shuriken came screaming out of the cloud. Sasuke dodged the shuriken and readied two kunai.

The Fuma Shuriken and it's shadow dispelled into Naruto's shadow clones, poised to riddle Sasuke with Kunai. Sasuke didn't even look behind him as he hit both Narutos between the eyes with his two kunai.

Sasuke took a small hop backward as Naruto rocketed out of the ground where Sasuke's feet used to be. Sasuke bounced forward again and delivered a savagely powerful roundhouse kick to Naruto's stomach. Sasuke watched Naruto bounce until he flipped in midair and landed on his feet. Naruto skidded, and smiled at Sasuke as he dispelled. Sasuke's eyes widened as he began looking around for Naruto. Sasuke's ears twitched, and at the last second, he spun around to lock blades with the real Naruto, who came up behind the first clone after Sasuke stopped paying attention to the hole in the ground.

Sasuke realized that Naruto was overpowering him in the blade-lock, so Sasuke suddenly spun around behind Naruto, which threw him off balance. Sasuke kicked Naruto's feet out from under him and then he attempted to vivisect Naruto from back to stomach while he was parallel to the ground.

Naruto tucked his knees and flipped out of the way of the sword. He landed on his feet and did a 360 degree spin as he stuffed all of his strength and momentum into the swing of his sword.

The sword made a screaming sound as it sliced throught the air. Sasuke's eyes zeroed in on the incoming sword as he blocked it, but Sasuke didn't have time to brace, so the kinetic energy sent Sasuke flying toward a tree. Sasuke recovered in the air and landed on the tree. He sword was still ringing with the vibration and his right arm was feeling numb. Sasuke glared at Naruto and Charged a chidori in his left hand.

Naruto's fangs and whisker marks became more pronounced as a neon red Rasengan began to form in Naruto's off-hand.

They tore through the air, and their attacks met. There was a bright explosion of red chakra and blue lightning as they were both blown back. Naruto's red Rasengan was the more powerful of the two attacks, so he experienced less recoil than Sasuke, who was slammed into the very tree he jumped from.

Sasuke landed on his feet and stood up tall. He sheathed his sword and charged a chidori in each hand as lightning began to splay out from his entire body. Naruto readied his orange Ninjato. The eyes of the fox-headed crossguard began to glow red in reaction to the lightning chakra.

Sasuke charged Naruto this time and began rapidly swinging his glowing fists. Sasuke was too precise to leave an opening for Naruto to counter attack, so Naruto hopped backward to avoid Sasuke's straight punch and gain some distance so he could use a wind justu.

Naruto's sharp eyes caught Sasuke's smirk and he became worried. Naruto was in midair, so Sasuke pointed the finger on his already extended fist, and the chidori began stretching to peirce Naruto through the heart.

Things were moving in slow motion for Naruto as he spun 90 degrees to his left in order to dodge the chidori blade. Sasuke then extended the chidori in his other hand and swung it at Naruto's back. Naruto positioned his sword so that it would absorb the incoming blade.

Sasuke was about to pinch his fingers together so that Naruto couldn't escape, but he noticed Naruto sling a kunai at him. Sasuke cocked his head to the side to dodge the knife. As it zoomed past his head, he noticed the esplosive tag attached to it.

Sasuke's concentration broke, and along with it, his chidori fizzled out as he tried to get some distance from the flying knife.

Naruto slid on his shoulder and did a misty flip so that he had his back to Sasuke. He then began sprinting for his life.

Things were happening in slow motion for Sasuke as the tag glowed white.

Naruto felt and heard the explosion behind him, the shockwave blew him forward and he was nearly slammed into a tree. Naruto dusted his haori off and waited for the smoke and dust to clear. The crater from the explosion looked like pac-man, with Sasuke crouching where the top and bottom jaws would meet.

The ground in front of Sasuke was completely unharmed. Sasuke's shirt was ripped on the left side, and a familiar wing was sticking out of his left shoulder blade. Sasuke's curse seal extended and he completed the transformation.

Naruto frowned and glowed red as his features became more feral. Sasuke looked up at the greying sky and flashed through a few hand signs and raised his hand to the sky.

Dark clouds began to swirl above Sasuke as Naruto took a defensive stance and pulled out two strange looking kunai.

Sasuke narrowed his eyes. "Sorry, but I can't afford to waste any more time on you. You're stronger than I expected, I don't think I can beat you without this."

Naruto smiled. "You're not as weak as you used to be either, Teme."

Naruto looked up in suspicion as lightning began to violently crackle above Sasuke.

A dragon composed of lightning appeared above Sasuke and glared at Naruto. It then disappeared into the clouds. "Begone with the roar of the thunder. **Kirin!**"

Naruto put all the cues together in his head. _'He didn't… how's that even possible? No, no way.'_

'_**Don't think! FUCKING RUN!'**_

The very instant Naruto began sprinting, he'd felt like he was hit in the head by a sledgehammer as his body seized up. He saw the ground rapidly approach his face, but he couldn't feel the impact of his body hitting the ground.

Naruto couldn't move as his muscles fought him every second of the way. His vision slowly went greyscale, and then black, as his heart stopped.

* * *

Sasuke looked at Naruto's twitching body, still discharging traces of the massive voltage within his body. The curse seal deactivated as Sasuke had exhausted its' store of chakra for the day.

Sasuke began to walk away, but he whirled around in when he heard Naruto frantically inhale. He stared, in horror as Naruto slowly got up and shook his Haori.

A bunch of glowing blue tags fell out of the overcoat as Naruto began to laugh.

Naruto grinned as he scratched the back of his head. "I'll be quick enough to dodge that one next time! I guess I lucked out on that one!"

"What the? What ARE YOU?!" Sasuke drew his sword in fear as he watched the burns on Naruto's body close before his eyes.

Naruto's grin got even bigger. "You showed me yours, now I'll show you mine."

Sasuke took a defensive stance. "This isn't the time for your stupid innuendos!"

Naruto reared back and launched one of his 'strange' kunai directly at Sasuke's chest. The kunai was moving to fast to dodge, so Sasuke caught it. In a flash of yellow light, Naruto was crouched on Sasuke's shoulder. Sasuke's sharingan didn't even register the movement. How the hell was Naruto standing on his shoulder? Nobody's that fast.

Naruto slapped Sasuke on the back of the head and back-flipped off the Uchiha's shoulder. "You're not wearing your headband, teme."

Naruto reached into his hip pouch and tossed a headband with a scratch on it to Sasuke. "Do you not recognize me as an equal, teme?"

Sasuke caught it and smirked at it. "I guess I have to acknowledge you now." Sasuke tied the scratched headband around his head and pointed Naruto's Kunai at him.

"It's time for round 2!" ... or what would have been round two. The contents of Naruto and Sasuke's stomachs emptied themselves onto the grass.

* * *

_**'Fucking morons.'**_

_'Oh god. It won't stop coming out.'_

* * *

_After the two boys were done vomiting... oh wait they're not done yet._

_~~~~ 5 minutes later._

* * *

Naruto wiped his mouth and huffed, he rocketed past Sasuke. Sasuke turned, tracking the blonde's movements and saw that Naruto's back was facing him. The Uchiha shifted his weight to charge Naruto, but in a yellow flash, Naruto was gripping Sasuke's wrist with the Hiraishin kunai in it.

"That's mine." Naruto snatched the Kunai from Sasuke and began attacking, much like Asuma with his trench knives.

Sasuke was reading Naruto's moves just fine, but he couldn't figure out how he was using the Hiraishin, a technique thought to have died with the 4th Hokage.

Naruto slashed at Sasuke with his right kunai and Sasuke dodged it. There was another yellow flash and somehow, Naruto's left kunai had grazed Sasuke's jugular, Sasuke had barely dodged it.

Sasuke jumped back. "I thought you wanted to bring me back to Konoha."

Naruto's eyes flashed red as he roared at Sasuke. "I NEVER PROMISED HER I'D BRING YOU BACK ALIVE!"

Naruto shook his head and his eyes went blue again. "What the… damn. I'm losing control, I need to end this now."

Sasuke glared and he and Naruto charged, once again, Naruto's body instantly rotated 180 degrees with a yellow flash, and his right arm would be where his left arm previously was.

'_Those kunai are some kind of teleportation medium. I need to break one of them.'_

Naruto charged Sasuke and tried the same trick, but this time, Sasuke was ready. He was watching Naruto's back hand this time, and he was able to calculate where it would be if he were to rotate 180 degrees.

The instant Naruto used Hiraishin, Sasuke ran lightning chakra through his sword and parried Naruto's kunai. It sliced the Kunai in half, rendering it useless. Naruto backflipped away and put the remaining Kunai away as he drew his sword once more.

"You really are a genius, Sasuke-teme."

"And you're full of surprises, Dead-last."

They were about to clash swords when a familiar pair of hands grabbed their wrists and launched them into trees on opposite ends of the clearing.

Naruto and Sasuke nostalgically dislodged their swords from their respective trees and turned to see Kakashi standing there.

"Oi, Kakashi-sensei! This is my fight!"

Kakashi's visible eye was eerily calm. "We don't have _time _for this. If you want to fight all out, set up a playdate."

Sasuke attempted to sneak away, but another Kakashi shot out of the ground and roundhouse kicked Sasuke into the air. Sasuke skidded to a halt in front of Kakashi, who yanked the Uchiha up by the wrist.

"Let go of me Kakashi! I'm not going back!"

"I know... Sasuke, I can smell the ozone, you were trying to kill Naruto. If I say anything about this to the Hokage, she'll put you in the bingo books and add "dead or alive" to your bounty listing."

Sasuke scoffed. "Do as you wish! I've a purpose to fulfill, and until then, nothing else matters!"

Kakashi sighed and Judo slammed Sasuke into the ground. He pinned his knee against Sasuke's neck and spoke very quietly.

"I sincerely regret having taught you to use the chidori. I'll let you go this time in honor of the time you spent as my apprentice. Now get out of here before I kill you myself."

Kakashi stood up and allowed Sasuke to limp away, Naruto attempted to dart past Kakashi to get to Sasuke. Kakashi caught Naruto by the collar of his haori and held him off the ground.

"But he's right there Kakashi-sensei!"

Kakashi thumped Naruto over the head. "Those aren't the techniques you use on comrades, Naruto-kun. What would Sakura say if you brought Sasuke home in a body-bag?"

Naruto hung his head and allowed Kakashi to continue.

"Let him come home of his own volition. Trying to force it will make him resent you even more. You need to get some sleep, Shikamaru has a plan, and from what I've seen, I think you'll be useful in its' execution."

Naruto bashfully scratched the back of his head and chuckled. "Exactly how much did you see?"

"Enough... didn't I teach you what happens when you fight on a full stomach?"

Naruto glared up at Kakashi. "No."

"Well, from what I saw, you at least learned _something_ from me. Are you _sure_ you don't want to be promoted to _Jonin_? I can vouch for you."

"Not until Sasuke comes back."

Kakashi looked into the forest. "That may be a while."

Naruto punched his palm and it made a thunderous boom. "… That's why I'm dragging him back to Konoha ASAP 'ttebayo! I'm tired of being a genin!"

"Well... Good luck with that blondie." Kakashi patted Naruto on the head and they disappeared in a swirl of leaves.

* * *

Orochimaru peered into his crystal ball and smirked as he replayed Naruto's fight with Sasuke. _"Kukukuku. Interesting."_

* * *

AN: Whew. I love writing fight scenes, but they take a lot out of me. I have a SUPER MEGA AWESOME SURPRISE FIGHT planned for the finale of this arc, it's something that they should have put in the show/manga, but it would have required Naruto and Sasuke be of equal power in the early episodes (Kishi wasted a great opportunity). If you figure out what it is, write a review. If you're correct, you get a cookie (an air flavored one).

~_Breath of the Wiz, Signin' Off._


	14. Chapter 14: Parallels

AN: I've just started college, so sorry about the long wait, but I figure it's time to get back to writing now that I have a grip on my schedule. So, anyway... here's chapter 14, and I'll be back soon with 15, which will end this Wave Country Arc. After that, we can get back to Naruto's harem shenanigans and what have you. Let's go.

* * *

Orochimaru stared into his crystal ball with a look of amusement as he watched the playback of the battle between Jiraiya's apprentice and his own. He took a mental note of Naruto's progress as a ninja and considered stealing Naruto's body, and implanting Sasuke's eyes into it. However, doing so without being ripped apart by the Kyuubi was another matter entirely. The old snake decided to shelve the idea for the time being as he sensed Sasuke's cursed seal outside of the wood cabin.

"Kabuto-kun."

Kabuto nodded in reply and opened the door for Sasuke as he ushered the Uchiha toward the table.

"Anything you need patched up?"

Sasuke pointed to his ribs and a few burns on his back, Kabuto promptly began healing the boy.

There was a pause, the only sound being the crickets, and the whirring of kunai Orochimaru twirled around his pinky finger.

"It seems that Naruto Uzumaki has progressed far more than I anticipated, what's _your_ assessment of his strength, Sasuke-kun?"

"I should have won that battle, there must have been something I missed, perhaps-"

Kabuto cut Sasuke off. "You're evenly matched, what you've picked up in technique and skill, he's gained in physical prowess. He'll be an obstacle toward the completion of this mission if he's a strong as Sasuke. What should our next move be Orochimaru-sama?"

Orochimaru sighed as he leaned back in his chair. "Seeing as I've only anticipated having to deal with Jiraiya, Kakashi, and maybe some ANBU, we'll move now and force them to react."

"I advise we wait until morning. We'll only reopen Sasuke's wounds if we try to leave now."

Orochimaru scratched his chin pensively. "True, Sasuke-kun, I will need you to keep Naruto-kun occupied if it comes down to it." Orochimari groaned as he envisioned his contingency plans crashing down on top of him at the mere appearance of the Uzumaki. "He has a disturbing tendency to derail any and all plans he comes into contact with… We move at dawn tomorrow."

* * *

"They'll make their move at dawn tomorrow."

"Eh? Why not now?"

Naruto and company stared at Shikamaru in skepticism.

"Naruto, you said that you moderately injured Sasuke right?"

"Yeah, but what's that got to d-… oooooh."

Jiraiya stated the obvious as he put it together. "They'd have a medic on hand to treat Sasuke, but since medical ninjutsu only speeds healing and doesn't actually repair damage, they'd have to rest for the night to make sure Sasuke is at 100%"

Kakashi rolled a kunai between his fingers as his lazy eye swiveled toward the group. "So, we know when they're moving, but how do we plan to ward them off from Kirigakure?"

Shikamaru pulled out a map and a list. "Since I've narrowed it down to these three buildings, I was able to predict the route they'd take to Kirigakure. We can't risk a fight inside the village however, that'd be a PR nightmare for the Hokage, so we'll catch them on this road here. Orochimaru probably knows this too, if so, he's anticipating a fight with us on the road between the fishing village and Kirigakure. Jiraiya-sama, you've warned the Mizukage about him right?"

The Sannin scoffed. "She has the village on _high alert_, 'psh' but when's that ever stopped Orochimaru?"

"Exactly, that's why _we're_ going to stop him. We can't allow them to capture Sasuke, or even Orochimaru, however unlikely that is." Mitsuki added.

Anko put her hands on her hips as she stared at Shikamaru's maps. "So, what's your plan of action, bookworm?"

There's only one road from here to Kirigakure, Jiraiya-sama and Kakashi-san will wait for him on the road and-"

Kakashi cut Shikamaru off to provide his own input. "Orochimaru doesn't go anywhere without Kabuto, it'd be best for everyone if I were to deal with him."

Jiraiya concurred with Kaksahi's statement. "I'm keyed to Orochimaru, and Kakashi to Kabuto, that leaves Naruto and Sasuke. Simple as that."

"Ne, Ero-Sannin? You can't beat Orochimaru on your own, Snake beats Toad, Slug beats Snake. In case you haven't noticed Baa-chan isn't here this time."

Jiraiya smirked. "That trick I showed you should counter that."

"The sage thingy? When are you gonna teach me that, Ero-Sannin?"

"Later, gaki."

Anko crossed her arms. "Fine, don't give me a shot at the Snake Bastard, I won't hold it against you."

Shikamaru piped in in his perpetually bored tone. "The rest of us need to deal with any reinforcements that Orochimaru has brought with him, Anko-senpai. For now, we need to set up on the road."

"Pack your things, we march in an hour."

" 'ttebayo! It's showtime!"

* * *

Hinata stared at the passing clouds outside her window as they reflected the light of the rising sun. She'd figured that it would be simpler to just lie down until another topic came to her mind. This wouldn't be much of a problem if she weren't thinking about Naruto.

Hinata had spent the better part of the previous night trying to find him, but to no avail. She'd asked Sakura, who twitched and winced every time she said his name, Ino would dodge her questions with catty replies, and Ten-Ten… didn't even know he was back yet.

The heiress of the Hyuuga clan had finally come to the conclusion that Naruto was on a mission, but even then, she'd sat there all night, unable to sleep. The girl knew that she had to get to Naruto before Hanabi did. Hinata had long ago deduced that there was something wrong with Hanabi on a deep psychological level; their earlier exchange had only further cemented the notion. Hinata had to get to Naruto before Hanabi did, otherwise, he might think that the entire Hyuga family is crazy.

Hinata slapped her forehead after some further thought.

"It would be miraculous if he didn't _already_ think we're all crazy!" Hinata immediately covered her mouth when she realized that she wasn't alone in the Hyuuga estate.

Seconds later she heard a knock on the door.

"Hinata-sama? Are you alright in there?"

"I-I'm fine Neji-san!" Hinata was scrambling to hide the evidence that she'd snuck out past curfew.

"I heard yelling."

"I was… uhm… changing a light bulb… and it zapped me!" Hinata was busy placing her walking shoes back where they were supposed to be, she was about to close the open window before she heard Neji begin to open the door.

"Hinata-sama, are you burned? I'm coming in."

Whenever Hinata was out past curfew, and someone found out, the blame usually fell to Neji, and with Neji being... Neji, he'd shoulder the blame whenever Hinata was out all night. Hinata, with no other options threw off her jacket and pants and slung them to the other end of the room... her face turned pink in nervous anticipation.

Oh boy, here we go…

"KYAAAAA! NEJI-SAN!"

The Hyuuga prodigy stared blanky for exactly one second. He then bowed and held his position as he scooted out the door.

"My sincerest apologies Hinata-sama! It won't happen again." He stayed in his bow as he closed the door. Neji would be avoiding Hinata for several hours following this incedent.

Hinata let out a huge sigh and slipped her clothes back on. While she didn't like tricking close relatives, (or embarrassing herself to stay out of trouble) she felt that it was the right thing to do, for Neji's own sake.

Hinata was about to get in the bed and get some well deserved sleep… that was, until she heard a low-placed knock on her door with an accompanying voice.

"Hinata onee-san."

Hinata's turned pale as she moved to open the door for her baby-sister.

* * *

"Damn, what have I roped myself into?"

Ino plopped her head down on the register in the Yamanaka Flower Shop with a loud 'thunk'. Here she was, chasing Naruto, but he had an ungodly amount of baggage following him. The funny part? None of said baggage was actually Naruto's to begin with, it all came in the form of the people close to him.

Be it Sasuke, or Sakura's inability to understand her own feelings and thoughts, it was all a cluster-fuck of bad omens. Even so, Ino knew, that deep down, Naruto was worth the trouble.

Ino's train of thought was interrupted when she heard the door open, she plastered on her fake smile for her customer.

"Welcome to Yamanaka Arrangements! How can I-… hey Forehead."

Sakura silently pulled another chair up to the cash register. "Hey Piggy-chan, I came to talk."

Ino stretched and cracked her back. "I hope you didn't come to apologize, because if someone should be saying sorry, it's me. What I said the other day was out of line, I don't know enough about your personal relationships to make those kinds of judgements, for that, I'm sorry."

"It's fine, you were right about Naruto. It's just…"

Ino leaned over the desk. "You like both of them and you're conflicted on what you should do."

Sakura flushed. "I-I don't know about _that_ yet. I mean, yeah, Naruto's cute and all, but I…" Sakura flushed.

'_Oh Kami, I said that out loud.'_

'_**SHANNARO! WHO GIVES A FUCK?!- It's true after all.'**_

Ino smirked and leaned further over the register. "Hmmmmm?"

Sakura's look of pensiveness turned to fear. "What if… I'm just looking for someone to replace Sasuke?"

Ino stopped smirking and sat back in her chair. Staring at the ceiling, she put her feet on the register desk and shut her eyes.

That familiar devious smirk crossed Ino's face. "Ah, you won't have to worry about that Forehead."

"Why not? It's a legitimate concern."

"It won't be a problem, Naruto will only have eyes for me by our third date. I'll take'im off your hands so you can get your _real_ boy toy back." Ino stuck out her tongue.

Sakura frowned. "I'm being serious here."

Ino smirked back. "So am I, Forehead. You can talk to me about anything you want, but just know, Naruto's _mine._"

Ino's catty demeanor instantly swapped with a playful one. "So! Now that's out of the way! Let's talk all things Naruto!"

Sakura stared in horror at her possibly bipolar friend. "…"

* * *

"H-Hanabi-chan! This isn't the kind of thing someone your age should be asking about!"

Hanabi's blank expression continued to bore into Hinata's bright red face. "Tell me then, who else could I ask about this? Father would have a heart attack, as would Neji-san, and we don't have a mother to ask. I believe the question would fall to you by default, so I'll ask again."

Hinata squeaked. "No! No-no-no-no-no!"

Hanabi ignored her sister's pleas. "I've taken the size of my frame in relation to Uzumaki-san's, and I'd like a recommendation on which brand of lubricant to use. I'm afraid Uzumaki-san's erection would cause me discomfort and possibly injury should I go without some form of lubrication. If my calculations are correct his penis is approxim-… Hinata-nee-san?"

Hinata had passed out due to the rush of blood to her head. Hanabi stood there and stared at her sister, she closed the drafty window so her sister wouldn't fall ill.

"If this is the case, I'll relay my inquiry to the Hokage." Hanabi walked out of the room, and down the hallway past a shell shocked Neji and a disturbed Hiashi. "Good morning Neji-san, Otou-sama."

Neji sputtered. "H-Hiashi-sama? What should we do?"

Hiashi just stood there, staring straight ahead.

* * *

Many miles away, Naruto sneezed rather obnoxiously.

Jiraiya smacked Naruto on the back of the head. "Ne gaki, what part of 'stakeout' don't you understand?"

"I got it, I got it."

"My ass, you're lucky I haven't sensed anything yet."

"More ramen please."

Jiraiya looked back at Naruto in confusion… the Uzumaki was asleep. Jiraiya scratched his head.

He looked at Naruto with interest. "Oi, gaki. Are you asleep?"

"No, Jiraiya-sama."

"… Yup, he's asleep." Jiraiya picked Naruto up by the shoulders and shook him.

"Gah! Ero-Sannin! What is it!?"

Jiraiya slammed his hand over Naruto's mouth and pointed to the road. "SHHHHHH!"

Jiraiya whispered to Naruto. "If things go bad, I'll need you to back me up. Stay here and try not to do anything stupid… for at least 15 minutes."

"I've fought the Snake-Bastard before 'ttebayo! Give me some credit!"

"Wait you have? God, Naruto, remind me to ask you about the stuff you did before we met, alright? I need new material."

"Fine, whatever."

Jiraiya sauntered out into the center of the road and waited for about 20 seconds, right then, a plethora of figures broke the horizon. Jiraiya smirked as his sage-mode activated.

"Oi! When are you gonna teach me how to do that?"

Jiraiya's head snapped over toward the thick foliage in annoyance. "SHUTUP!"

Eventually, the figures reached speaking distance of Jiraiya. In front of the Toad Sage was a large squad of sound shinobi, Kabuto, Sasuke, and Orochimaru himself.

Orochimaru gave a psychotic grin as he stepped forward. "Kukuku, It's been some time, eh Jiraiya?"

Jiraiya blankly stared at his former teammate.

"What is it Jiraiya? Aren't you happy to see me?"

"No… not really."

"But why not? It's been nearly three years since our last reunion… speaking of reunions. How is Tsunade-chan doing?"

Jiraiya rolled his eyes. "She _still _wants you dead, same as last year."

Orochimaru laughed. "Kukuku, you all forgot to send me my birthday presents last year too."

Jiraiya dug in his ear. "Well, I _was _gonna send you a cactus… but your're not worth the money spent."

"Tsk tsk, that's no way to play with others Jiraiya. I'm just trying to stay in the loop, that's all. I saw your Jinchuuriki boy in action, I see you've spared no expense in his training."

Jiraiya groaned with impatience. "You talk too much, can we fight now?"

Orochimaru groaned. "… yes! You all let me worry about Jiraiya, go."

With that, the ninja leapt into the trees and continued forward toward Kirigakure. Strangely, Sasuke didn't leave with the others, he stepped forward so that he was standing next to Orochimaru.

* * *

Naruto beeped Kakashi on the communicator. "Orochimaru stayed behind to fight Ero-Sannin, the rest of the Sound Ninja are headed toward you."

Kakashi quickly replied. "How many?"

"About 12 plus that Kabuto asshole."

"12 plus Kabuto? That's too easy. Naruto, you back up Jiraiya-sama."

"O'course! Naruto out."

Orochimaru smirked. "I know about your sage-mode Jiraiya, Sasuke's here to be my second pair of eyes, a counter your speed advantage."

Jiraiya smirked. "Not that it would help… Naruto? Would you like to join the party?"

Naruto appeared next to Jiraiya and started glowing red.

Naruto bared his fangs and cracked his knuckles." 'ttebayo! You don't even have to ask."

* * *

AN: Yup, Naruto and Jiraiya vs. Sasuke and Orochimaru. I can't quite give a time-table on when chapter 15 will be released, mainly because I've just started college, so I don't have much time to just sit down and write for pleasure. Don't worry, I won't be as long as this last gap of time.


	15. Chapter 15: In A Flash of Light

Hello all, this extra-long chapter will conclude the Wave Arc, and move us into something else. Next chapter, Naruto will be returning to Konoha for some shenanigans to take his mind off of the deep shit he's been dragged into, at least until it all gets crazy again. *Update* Check out my profile for a poll to select our 6th lovely lady to join Naruto's fanclub. Make your vote count though, 'cause this will be the last girl. Let's do this.

* * *

The two Sannin drew some of their own blood and flashed through a familiar set of hand-signs.

"_Kuchiyose no Jutsu!"_

"_Kuchiyose no Jutsu!"_

Gamabunta and Manda towered above the tree line and stared at each other with disgust.

"_**Jiraiya… you know how I feel about snakes."**_

"I know, I know, don't worry, I'm prepared to deal with our disadvantage."

The giant toad realized what the Toad Sannin was talking about when he looked atop his head.

"_**Heh! I'm surprised you didn't invite the Shima an' Fukusaku to the party."**_

"I figured I wouldn't bother them with such a minor altercation."

"Oi! Bunta!" Naruto slapped the top of the giant's head. "Ya look like ya picked up some weight!"

"**This brat again? One at a time, sure, but the two of you in one place along with this prick?"**

The giant toad drew his sword and jeered at Manda while the monstrous serpent flicked his tongue hungrily.

The giant snake hissed to his summoner. **"It seems you've gotten it right for once Orochimaru. I **_**do **_**enjoy frog after all."**

"**Imma toad ya prick!"**

Manda charged at Gamabunta and his passengers, to avoid being bitten, the toad leapt hundreds of meters into the air and muttered to Jiraiya.

"**What's the gameplan? I can't beat Manda head-on."**

"You're here to keep Manda occupied, I know you hate snakes, so that's why the brat's here. Naruto will keep Manda at a distance while I handle Orochimaru and the Uchiha."

"**Alright then, show me whatcha got pipsqueak!" **Gamabunta began to fall back to the ground, and with that, the battle was on.

* * *

The trio crashed into the ground where Manda was at first, but the serpent reacted by slithering backward and surrounding Gamabunta with his body, the toad boss positioned his sword in a defensive stance so that Manda would think twice about trying to constrict his opponent.

The ground shuddered and rumbled as the two boss summons tried to outmaneuver each other. Manda reared back and darted in to try and bite Gamabunta.

"_Fuuton: Renkudan! (Drilling Air Bullet)" _Naruto started leaking red chakra as he thrust his hands forward, forming a diamond with his thumbs and forefingers. There was a thunderous boom as a roaring ball of compressed air flew from the opening between his palms.

The ball struck Manda right on the nose and snapped his head backward. Orochimaru and Sasuke were flung hundreds of feet into the air.

"That's my cue! Stay here!" Jiraiya was gone in a gust of wind and instantly appeared in mid air in front of Orochimaru with a Rasengan in each hand.

Jiraiya tried to lodge the screaming orbs of chakra through Orochimaru's chest, but the old snake had other plans. Orochimaru grabbed Jiraiya's wrists and forced the Kusanagi out of his throat in an attempt to stab Jiraiya.

Jiraiya grunted and planted both his feet into Orochimaru's chest in order to vacate the path of the extending blade. The Snake Sannin let go of Jiraiya's wrists and pulled the rest of the Kusanagi out of his mouth. Jiraiya made a shadow clone and bounded off of it in order to close the distance between himself and Orochimaru once more.

They collided in a flurry of punches, kicks, and sword slashes, but eventually Jiraiya landed a solid punch to his opponent's throat. Orochimaru gagged as the Kusanagi flew from his grip, thinking quickly, he fired a multitude of snakes from his sleeves in an effort to distract Jiraiya long enough to gain some distance.

Orochimaru finally landed on the ground next to an already waiting Sasuke, the Uchiha's sword was at the ready.

Orochimaru charged Jiraiya with Sasuke sprinting directly behind him. Jiraiya dodged Orochimaru's stab attempt and judo-flipped him into a tree, Orochimaru flipped in mid air and landed feet first onto the tree. He paused and launched himself at Jiraiya's back.

Jiraiya sensed Orochimaru approaching behind him, but he also had to deal with Sasuke, who was aiming a slash at his abdomen. Jiraiya waited until the last possible second and caught Sasuke's hand, he then attempted to use Sasuke as a shield for Orochimaru's attack.

Orochimaru grinned. "Perfect."

The snake Sannin dispersed into a cloud of white snakes and weaved around Sasuke in mid air. These snakes grew in size and ensnared Jiraiya's arms and legs. The real Orochimaru then darted out of his hiding spot in the trees, and aimed to stab his former teammate through the chest.

Jiraiya used some of his stored natural energy to grant him enough strength to tear the snakes binding his wrists. Jiraiya quickly flashed through some hand-signs, _"Hari Jizo!"._

Jiraiya's hair enveloped his body and protruded in a mass of white spikes. Orochimaru's eyes widened and he skidded to a halt in front of the white spikes, he spun on his heals and sprinted for cover.

From inside the mass of white spikes, there was another shout, _"Hari Jigoku! (Needle Hell)". _The spikes protruded even more so, and fired off in all directions, like a hailstorm of steel needles.

Orochimaru had just made it behind a tree, but Sasuke wasn't as informed about the attack as his master. Luckily, the Uchiha's Sharingan allowed him to weave and slice his way through the cloud of needles with only a few minor scratches.

Jiraiya jumped from tree to tree, finally reaching the top of the forest, he sent both chakra and natural energy to his legs, and jumped nearly a thousand feet into the air. He began forming the biggest Rasengan he could muster, by the time he began to fall back to earth, Jiraiya's Rasengan was the size of a small house. He reared back and threw it straight into the forest below.

Orochimaru and Sasuke's eyes widened as they both fled in Manda's direction. There was a short delay as the rasengan drilled into the ground, but then it exploded into hundreds of giant blades of chakra. There was a huge explosion of air and chakra as any trees in the immediate area were diced into logs and firewood. Orochimaru flipped and weaved through flying tree trunks and branches, Sasuke was close behind, opting to slice through any obstacles in order to keep up with his master.

As the dust cleared, and the rumbling of falling trees came to a close, Sasuke was the first to break the silence while they sprinted through the forest.

"It doesn't seem like we can fight him head on."

Orochimaru licked his lips. "It's our turn to go on the offensive now, he'll have used up all of his natural energy with that attack."

Orochimaru flashed through some hand signs and stomped on the ground mid-run. A pillar of rock launched himself and Sasuke high into the air, in Manda's general direction.

"Manda!" Yelled the Snake Sannin.

* * *

Manda's eyes swiveled and he darted away from his duel with Gamabunta and Naruto.

Naruto noticed Sasuke and the Snake Bastard flying through the air. "Oi! Bunta! We can't let him catch those two until Ero-Sannin gets back here!"

"_**No shit."**_

Gamabunta jumped up into the air and impaled the end of Manda's tail. The Giant snake roared in annoyance and swatted Gamabunta, while in the process splitting his tail in two. Manda then proceeded on his course to catch Orochimaru and Sasuke.

"Damn it!" Naruto tried to gather some of his chakra, but as usual, the Kyuubi's chakra leaked into his system at an alarming rate. Red chakra billowed from Naruto as he jumped high into the air in order to intercept Manda.

Naruto's eyes began to turn red, as he'd accidentally drawn enough chakra for his body to start changing. His fingernails lengthened, his canines pronounced themselves, and of course, his whisker became more pronounced. Two chakra tails protruded from the base of his spine.

"Ah shit!" Naruto made the best of the situation and went into a nosedive. He used his chakra as a propulsion source in order to increase his speed while he steered himself toward the top of Manda's head.

Naruto angrily hailed his tenant. _'Dammit! What're you doing?!'_

'_**This blame game is unwarranted. I'm not the one who tampered with your seal remember?... Shouldn't you be worried about not killing us?'**_

'_I'm kinda wingin' it right now, help. Please.'_

_The Kyuubi gave an exhasperated sigh as he pawed the bars of his cage. __**'Fucking moron. –heheh- I'd expel my chakra on impact to cushion the landing, like the female with the large breasts does when she hits things… speaking of which…'**_ Naruto could sense the Kyuubi licking his lips.

'_Don't even finish that thought. This conversation's over.'_

Naruto sped up even more, now assured in his course of action, despite the disgusting implications of his tenant. He became a glowing red comet, streaking toward the top of Manda's head.

Orochimaru growled through his fangs and roared. "Damn that brat! MANDA, ABOVE YOU!"

The snake looked up just in time to see Naruto deliver the _MOTHER_ of all head-butts. There was a echoing '_thud_', and then, a deafening explosion of red chakra that tore through the area.

Trees flew everywhere, and for the second time that day, Orochimaru and Sasuke were dodging large pieces of flying wood.

The recoil launched Naruto back into the air with a headache; a large toad hand summarily caught him.

"**Heh, nice one kid." **The Boss Toad placed Naruto back on his head and took a defensive stance as they waited for the dust to settle.

Not a minute later, Jiraiya appeared on Gamabunta's head, looking less sagely than he did previously.

Jiraiya whistled at the crater and accompanying incapacitated serpent. "I don't remember teaching you to do that."

Naruto scoffed. "You didn't teach me anything on our trip… Oi! What took you so long to get back here anyway?"

Jiraiya frowned at his apprentice. "Your little stunt threw the whole damn forest at me. Heh, we must really hate trees."

"Ero-Sannin, your Sage shit turned off, I thought you gathered enough to finish this."

Jiraiya thumped Naruto on the top of the head. "Like I said, you threw the _**whole**_ forest at me. I had to use it to dodge all those flying trees… speaking of which, the Mizukage won't be too happy to see what we did to one of her forests."

Naruto cracked his neck with a painful grunt. "Meh, we'll cross that bridge when we get there… Remind me to go feet-first next time, I think I have a concussion."

"**Oi, look alive. This 'aint over yet."**

Jiraiya sighed. "No, no it's not. With Manda out of the picture…"

Jiraiya knealt down to gather more natural energy while Naruto kept watch. Naruto narrowed his eyes in suspicion. Manda was lying there, muttering curses underneath his breath; Orochimaru de-summoned Manda and began meticulously going through some hand signs.

Orochimaru's voice was venomous. _"How… annoying, that a brat like you could force my hand in such a way. You, you will be a problem if I don't eliminate you here, Uzumaki."_

Orochimaru finally finished his hand signs and yelled his jutsu, it had a name that was all too familiar to Jiraiya.

"_Yamata no Jutsu (Eight Branches Technique)"_

* * *

Kakashi, Mitsuki, Shikamaru, and Anko, sat in a forest clearing, sorting the bodies of their Oto victims, dead and alive.

Kakashi was busy examining Kabuto's body, or what he thought was Kabuto's body. Somewhere in the skirmish, or maybe the entire time, Kakashi had been whaling on another one of Kabuto's decoys. Kakashi scratched his head and hailed Naruto on the communicator.

"Oi, Naruto."

"…kinda busy."

"Well, we're done over here, need back up?"

"… … Ero-Sannin only wants you here, everyone else would get in the way- ah shit! –bzzt-."

"Naruto… Naruto! Damn. You all stay here and pump as much information as possible."

Kakashi jumped into the trees and made a beeline toward the sounds of the explosions.

* * *

Gamabunta darted around the forest dodging blasts of condensed chakra. One explosion came rather close, close enough to blast Naruto off of Gamabunta's head and into the forest below.

Naruto managed to land on his feet and quickly realized he was on fire. He managed to put it out, but by then his hair and clothes were singed and tattered. Strangely, his haori seemed to be no worse for wear, the tail of it was even on fire, but it didn't seem to be burning. The white fabric was as clean as the day he received it, the same could be said for the black reversible side.

Naruto realized that he was surrounded by burning foliage and elected to wrap the haori around his torso. Naruto grunted and huffed in annoyance and anticipation as he psyched himself up to further torch his long mane of blonde hair, and likely a good portion of his skin.

Naruto leaned forward and exploded through the burning trees as fast as he could carry himself. The strange haori protected his ninja tools and explosives from the fire, but his hair and exposed skin were even further damaged. Naruto busted through a wall of flame and saw the ensuing battle from the side.

Jiraiya and Gamabunta seemed to be perfectly in sync, dodging and weaving through Sasuke's lightning and fire jutsu, and Orochimaru's chakra blasts, occasionally firing back a torrent of oil and fire.

Naruto saw that Orochimaru wasn't giving Ero-Sannin an opening, so he took it upon himself to make one. Naruto took out his explosive kunai and stuck every one he had into the trees in front of him.

Naruto drew his sword and went through some one-handed signs. The orange blade of the ninjato glowed, "_Kazekiri no Jutsu!"_. Naruto spun 360 degrees and released a wide blade of wind through the air. It sliced through more than twenty trees and tossed them into the air a short distance.

Less than a quarter of a second afterward, Naruto stuck his sword into the ground and blazed through a sequence of handsigns. "_Fuuton: Renkudan (Drilling Air Bullet)!" _The blast tore from Naruto's hands and struck the still suspended trees. They were launched at the eight-headed serpent like ballista bolts.

* * *

Jiraiya saw the incoming trees out of the corner of his eyes, so he tapped Gamabunta on the head. The giant toad and the Sannin simultaneously preformed hand signs and both yelled, "_Katon: Gamayu Endan!"._

Gamabunta spat oil in a circle around Orochimaru and Sasuke. Jiraiya ignited it with a blast of fire, trapping them while the trees impacted Orochimaru. Sasuke jumped off of his Sensei's head and into the brush below as the flying trees began to explode, one after another.

The Toad Boss took the opportunity to charge the stunned serpent, who was still reeling from the explosions. In a single swing, he decapitated all eight heads of the snake and jumped backward.

Sasuke, looking up at the carnage elected to leave the scene, as this had become much more trouble than it was worth, his master seemed to have lost sight of that.

Naruto appeared on top of Gamabunta's head and arrogantly scratched his nose. "Heh, the bigger they are-" Naruto was cut off when Gamabunta jumped again; he dodged a blast of purple chakra from one of the snake-heads.

All of the decapitated heads had split to become a gang of white serpents. Jiraiya groaned and yelled at his former teammate. "What kind of disgusting crimes against humanity did you commit to get that ability?"

The eight serpents hissed in unison. _**"Perhaps you should be figuring out how you plan to survive this battle? My methods of transcendence are of little concern to you."**_

Naruto glowed red as he became severely annoyed with Orochimaru's endless bag of tricks. "WHAT THE SHIT!? WHY WON'T YOU DIE?!

Naruto and Jiraiya tore through hand signs and fired off their long-range jutsu, one after another, over and over. Blasts of wind, fire, and earth, peppered the area. Explosions rocked the entire area, there was an almost deafening drone of continuously errupting explosions. The barrage of attacks didn't seem to faze Orochimaru at all, but it did keep them from firing chakra blasts at them.

Naruto ran out of jutsu to use first, Jiraiya and Gamabunta continued to fire attacks, all the while he stared at Naruto intensely. Naruto took this as a cue to start brainstorming.

Naruto slipped into his mind scape in order to give himself more time to think since time passed differently there. Naruto found himself in front of the Kyuubi's cage.

The massive demon smirked down at Naruto as he mocked him in a patronizing tone. _**"Dost thou require my help?"**_

"I need ideas. The Hiraishin would be really useful right now, but that bastard broke the other kunai."

The Kyuubi held up his fingers. **"We have five minutes at most in here until we get fried by that chakra blast. You'd better get to thinking."**

Naruto sat down and the walls began to reflect and organize his thoughts as he spoke. "The Hiraishin worked through the usage of a special seal formula, normally, anyone could use it if they had the seal, but this seal was special. You had to know how to run chakra through it to be able to activate it, but the paired kunai did that for me, you just had to run chakra through one and it would teleport you to the other." Naruto looked at the diagrams that had etched themselves into the walls of his mindscape in order to reflect his thoughts.

The Kyuubi crossed his arms as he leaned toward the bars of his cage to observe the writing on the walls. Two minutes of silence permeated the sewer, the fox broke the silence first. **"Simply brute force your way through the Kunai's seal with my chakra. I know the seal can't stand up to that kind of assault, funnel my chakra into your sword. If you create a circuit of chakra between the two objects, the sword will turn into a new medium for the teleportation technique, allowing you to travel."**

"How do you know how this stuff works?"

"**When you've been around as long as I have, you learn things. It'd do your dense ass well to pick up a book every once in a while. Anyway, that should keep us from going 0 and 2 against this prick."**

"Are you sure this isn't gonna kill me or something?"

"**I guarantee it will do the same thing. However I **_**am**_** unsure if it will teleport your entire body, you may come out the other end missing an arm, or even worse..." **The fox grabbed his crotch as it laughed at Naruto.

Naruto paled and began to chatter. "Oh."

"**It's that or die. Now, get out." **The Kyuubi promptly booted Naruto from his mindscape.

Naruto shook his head at the jarring transition.

He pulled out his father's Kunai and gulped as he created a circuit of chakra between it and his ninjato. Yellow electricity began to crackle between the blades and then there was a popping sound accompanied by a small plume of smoke from the kunai. The sword began to glow orange and the kunai turned a shade of red much like the fur of the Kyuubi.

'_**The jutsu should be applied to that kunai and your sword. Keep the seal for later… assuming you don't fucking die.'**_

Naruto thought for a second and looked at the kunai. He pulled the wooden handle from his fathers' blade, an important move, as it had a seal etched into it. Naruto then tied his last explosive tag onto the handle of the three-pronged kunai. Jiraiya looked at Naruto in horror as he flung the knife high into the air.

"THE HELL ARE YOU-" Jiraiya was cut off by the ensuing explosion and dejectedly turned back to firing more jutsu at the serpents.

Naruto held out his sword and closed his eyes, he could feel the shards of the kunai scattered around the battlefield. Naruto swallowed again as he forced chakra into his ninjato. Unbeknownst to Naruto, who was focused on selecting the right shard, there were purple balls of chakra mere feet away from himself and the others.

The blasts of energy disappeared, from existence. Naruto looked to his left and there was Kakashi, Sharingan spinning frantically. Kakashi dropped to a knee, his voice airy and out of breath as he clutched his bleeding eye. "I've only got a couple of those left in me. Bright ideas anyone?"

Kakashi's eyes widened, there was another barrage of chakra blasts coming toward the group. Kakashi's Mangekyou spun into existence once more, but the Kamui was entirely unnecessary this time.

The group disappeared in an _Orange Flash_.

* * *

Naruto, Jiraiya, Kakashi, and Gamabunta reappeared behind the eight snakes who didn't seem to understand what just happened. Gamabunta was confused, but quickly righted himself to take advantage of the opportunity. He charged a snake from behind and decapitated it.

Gamabunta laughed and bellowed. "**I don't know what that is kid, but keep doing it!"**

Naruto nodded in affirmation and raised his sword to chose another shard to teleport to. In half a minute, the stalemate had turned into a lopsided victory. The giant serpents, all decapitated, disintegrated into clouds of white scales that floated off into the sky.

Orochimaru slithered out of one of the carcasses before it broke down and made a beeline for the rendezvous point with a smirk on his face. "I've gotten what I came for, no point in pushing this any farther now. Oh well." Orochimaru licked the blood from his forehead and slithered off toward the rendezvous point.

Naruto sheathed his sword and looked at his teacher, who was visibly drained from buying them enough time to pull something off. Jiraiya grinned at his student with pride. "You crazy little brat… you figured it out."

Kakashi patted Naruto on the back. "At least I can say one of my students has become an incredible ninja as a result of my influence."

Naruto turned to his teacher and stared blankly. "What about Sakura-chan?"

Kakashi just looked down at his former-student and remained silent. Naruto twitched in response. "Oh."

He eye smiled and scratched the back of his head. "Being completely honest, between having both you and Sasuke as pupils... heh... I kinda forgot about her!"

Naruto shrugged and grinned. "I guess we _were _pretty awesome huh!"

Kakashi puffed out his chest. "And I'm the one who put you up to kenjutsu. This victory is indirectly mine, in a sense."

Naruto scratched his head as he mused to himself. "-heh- If i didn't have this sword, we'd probably be dead."

"Exactly."

Kakashi spun up his Mangekyou and scanned the area for anything that seemed sketchy.

The group remained on alert for nearly half and hour before they deduced that Orochimaru had left. The three ninja jumped off of Gamabunta's head while he went to go put out the forest fires.

Naruto plopped down on the grass and took a deep breath as his burns started to close up. Kakashi was recalling the group on his radio-transmitter as Jiraiya deactivated Sage Mode and propped his student up on a rock.

Naruto's eyes slowly closed as he fell into the deepest sleep he'd ever had.

* * *

A concerned pair of neon green eyes awakened Naruto, the sun was setting on horizon as the group had set up camp there for the evening, the team's sound prisoners were tied to a tree with steel wire.

"Your hair… I can fix it for you."

Naruto yawned and stretched as he looked around, it was sunset already. "Yeah –yawn- sure."

Mitsuki sighed to herself as she pulled out a kunai, she sat on the rock and sat Naruto up between her knees. "You really shouldn't be so reckless when you have people waiting for you, Namika- …Uzumaki-sama." Mitsuki took note of their current company and corrected how she referred to her charge.

Naruto smirked as his bodyguard fluffed his singed hair before she began pruning the burned sections. "I'm too stubborn to die." Mitsuki's kunai moved expertly around Naruto's head, and within five minutes, she'd nearly completed her work.

Mitsuki tied what remained of Naruto's spiky ponytail with a tiny orange ribbon she'd grabbed in the market back in the fishing village. Naruto's ponytail now only came down to his lower neck instead of reaching his waist, afterward Mitsuki evened out Naruto's bangs and gave him an overall touch up. The woman handed Naruto a hand mirror and inquired.

"Uzumaki-sama? Should I take more off the sides?"

"It's fine, I look like my dad, even more so than before. –sigh- Shame about my ponytail." Naruto pouted at the realization.

"I left as much of it as I could Uzumaki-sama. You actually look better than before, less –ahem- scruffy without all that hair."

"That might seem like a good thing from your point of view, but if I look even better, how will that help me fix my girl problems?"

Mitsuki grinned as she inquired. "Oh, right. What are you planning to do about that once you return?"

Naruto groaned. "I'm putting it off for now. I need to touch base with Ero-Sannin on a few things."

Mitsuki ushered Naruto up and turned him to face her. She pulled off his equally singed shirt and did a double take at the _eerily_ clean haori to examine his burns and cuts.

Naruto's heartbeat sped up at the feeling of her hands on his torso. Mitsuki somehow hadn't noticed before, but Naruto was covered in scars, most of them small scratches, except for one. It was on his right pectoral, about the size of a fist.

Mitsuki pressed down on the Chidori-scar and Naruto winced. "This is still tender, isn't it? I can heal it for you."

"No. It's a reminder."

She stared at Naruto's chest, visibly worried, but Naruto didn't notice. He was taking this opportunity to stare at her glowing eyes, they had an unnatural sort of... uh… _glow_ to them. Several seconds passed and Mitsuki noticed the silence, she looked back up at Naruto's face, he was staring at her with an enamored expression.

Naruto touched his forehead to Mitsuki's to get a closer look. "... You have pretty eyes."

Mitsuki smiled a tiny bit at her charge. "Thank you... I... uh..." she trailed off as she fell into Naruto's blue eyes. They were like that for almost 10 seconds, their lips moving closer and closer. Mitsuki kept trying to stop herself, but her body was ignoring her commands. Their lips brushed and Mitsuki tried to jerk herself backward, but she'd barely moved an inch before her body froze in protest.

Mitsuki grabbed Naruto's head and reluctantly forced herself backward, but then Naruto grabbed her head and pulled her into an energetic kiss. Naruto felt her tense up and then relax into it as she let out a small squeak, like she'd made a mistake or something.

The moment was tarnished when Naruto's lips felt rather strange texture shortly afterward. Naruto opened his eyes and he was holding a log as Mistuki stood over him, frowning.

"Namikaze-sama, we've already been over this."

Naruto bowed in shame. "I'm sorry, Ero-Sannin says I have really bad impulse control." After a long silence, Naruto cocked his head to the side and gave Mitsuki a cheeky grin "You didn't seem to mind too much though." This made her blush again, more than she had before, the kunoichi was and at a loss for words. She went for her first-aid kit and started to wonder just what Anko had done to Naruto in the woods that night. Naruto continued to stare at his bodyguard as he asked her a question that had been on his mind for the longest time. "Anyway, why do your eyes glow like that? They're neon green."

Mitsuki crossed her arms as she pouted in response, Naruto had to resist the urge to kiss her again just to see how she'd react. She replied haughtily. "They just do, it's a family thing."

"There's something you're not telling me. Kekkei Genkai?"

"Big deal, I can see in the dark, but that's about it. Nothing worth invoking the CRA over."

Naruto was about to make a snide remark about the Clan Restoration Act and Sasuke's lack of interest in it before they were interrupted… by a chuckling bush, Mistuki rolled her eyes and went back to treating Naruto's scratches and bumps.

The bush spoke. "You two... You have great chemistry, you know."

Naruto, who for some reason, was still holding the log, opted to launch a pebble at the bush with his big toe.

There was a loud pinging sound and a grunt from the bush. After a pause, Jiraiya sauntered out of the bush with a large dent in his custom forehead-protector, he had a glare aimed at his apprentice. Kakashi was close behind, peering over the Sannin's shoulder, of course so he could sneak a peak at Jiraiya's notepad.

Kakashi was the first to speak. "Jiraiya-sama, I know these are based off of true events, but how will you keep readers from thinking it's just a cliché storm like most other novels of this genre?"

Jiraiya looked at his dented forehead-protector. "Meh, I don't do this for the money. I could care less about reviews, favorites, follows, and other shit like that."

Kakashi raised his visible eyebrow without looking up from the page of notes. "…What?"

(har har har)

Jiraiya smirked. "Nothing."

Shortly after it was confirmed that Naruto was okay, all of the group excepting Naruto, Jiraiya, and Kakashi, headed back to Konoha with their prisoners in tow. It had taken Naruto almost half an hour to convince Mitsuki to head home and get some rest, but eventually she caved and walked back with the rest of the group. Anko, in being pressed for time, opted to renew Naruto's hickey in place of another escapade out in the woods.

The next day was mostly taken up by Jiraiya's report to the Mizukage, Naruto wanted to meet him, at least until he learned that 'he' was a she. In light of that Naruto opted to stay in camp with Kakashi, he didn't feel like adding another candidate to his list of interested females.

After about an hour, Naruto got bored and decided to drag Kakashi with him to Tazuna's house to bum some free food. Tazuna didn't let Naruto eat after the stunt he pulled with Sasuke the last time. Naruto caused a fuss, and somewhere during the chaos, Kakashi had managed to remove his mask and eat, much to the chagrin of Naruto.

They said their goodbyes and Naruto decided to finish his business in Wave Country. He called Jiraiya on the radio, they met at Haku's gravesite.

"Ero-Sannin, what's up with the grave?"

The Sannin took a gander and instantly replied. "It's genjutsu, really well done too. I'm surprised you caught it. Kai!"

The illusion wouldn't seem to dispel so Jiraiya tried several more times. "Hmm." Jiraiya stared at the patch of grass and took out a kunai. He cut a seal into the hilltop and ran chakra through it. It dispelled the illusion and Naruto just stood there, silent, his eyes shifted red from what he saw. Naruto was absolutely livid.

"Their graves were dug up... Someone took the bodies and-" Naruto's voice was barely a whisper as his breathing began to speed up. "Who did this?"

Jiraiya turned to his apprentice with a grim expression.

"_Naruto, do you know what the Edo Tensei is?"_

Naruto fell to his knees and nearly vomited.

_"I don't think I want to."_

* * *

Yes, Naruto is officially the Orange Flash, in case you were wondering.

Things are going to get ugly for Naruto the next time he bumps into Orochimaru, and he knows it. Anyway, thanks for being patient, with this arc, writing plot relevant things is hard. Anyway, Naruto will be going back home next chapter. He already had a lot on his plate with his girl problems, but now, he has to deal with the knowledge that he may have to fight a twisted version of Haku. Anyway, I'll see you guys next time. Remember to fave and review.

_~ Breath of the Wiz, Signin' Off_


	16. Chapter 16: With New Understanding

AN: There's a poll open at the top of my profile for our 6th girl in Naruto's fanclub. If you are anything like me, you can visualize how hilariously awesome this story can get if she wins. Remember to vote, because I won't introduce the 6th girl until I get enough information.

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Naruto, Kakashi, and Jiraiya walked silently along the road. Naruto was still in shellshock from his master's explanation of the Edo Tensei kinjutsu. He felt angry and disgusted, but deep down; he wasn't surprised someone like Orochimaru would stoop so low as grave robbing in order to achieve his objectives.

'How do I even prepare myself for something like this?'

'_**You can't. Don't bother yourself with it.'**_

'And what would you know about loving anyone?'

The Kyuubi began to laugh, and slowly, but surely, the laughter faded into the back of Naruto's mind.

'I'll never understand what makes you tick, will I?'

'_**Not a chance in hell.' **_

Naruto could just feel the smugness rolling off of the fox's voice, he could imagine him flicking his tails back and forth as he mocked him. Naruto focused his attention outward as he stared at the birds in the sky; he wished he could be like them sometimes, a life with no obligations or restraints.

Naruto pondered the idea of fighting Orochimaru once more, but he took into consideration what the Kyuubi had said. The demon was right, it was no use thinking about it now, but still, it was a serious concern, but what could he do about it?

Jiraiya looked at his apprentice, deep in thought, his advice mirrored Naruto's own thoughts. "Naruto, there's no way to prepare yourself against Edo Tensei, It's not something _**anyone**_ can prepare for, especially when someone important to you is brought back."

Naruto hung his head in dejection. "I can't help it Ero-Sannin."

Kakashi chimed in. "Maybe you should think about your girl problems, it'll take your mind off all this."

Naruto slapped his forehead. "Ahhhgh! That's right! I completely forgot! What do I do about that?"

Jiraiya smirked at Kakashi and whipped out his notepad. Kakashi's eye blazed with raw determination and focus, the Copy Cat looked at Naruto and drilled him on his game plan.

"Naruto, how do all of your relationships look right now?"

Naruto scratched his head. "Well, Anko-chan wants me to be her boyfriend and I'm interested, but I really like Mitsuki-chan too. Ino wanted to start fresh with me, I think she deserves a chance and I want to see where that goes. Sakura… looking back with what I know now, I still don't really know what she wants from me."

Kakashi pried even more. "You don't know?"

"There's something off about her, like she's sick or something. Don't tell me it's obvious, 'cause it's not. I don't know what she wants, and I don't think she does either 'ttebayo."

"Hm."

Jiraiya scribbled furiously in his notepad and triumphantly slammed it shut as he completed his thoughts. Naruto was about to hurl an insult at his current sensei, but the words were sucked out of his mouth as Konoha came into view.

Naruto dreaded his return more and more as the three ninja approached the gate. Our protagonist took a deep breath as he showed his ID card to Izumo and Kotetsu, and he stepped through the gates, a changed man, for the second time in a week.

Naruto had stuffed his rather ornate haori into his backpack and opted for some simple street clothes for the trek back to Konoha. He wore a long sleeved orange t-shirt and some navy ninja pants that were wrapped at the ankles.

Naruto had dressed down for this day specifically, but he was never very accustomed to stealth, the bright orange shirt was a dead giveaway of that. The blonde slowly but surely realized his error as the three ninja walked toward the Hokage's tower in the center of the village.

The eyes of the female population were once again undressing Naruto, he rolled his eyes and unintentionally flipped his hair. They squealed. Loudly.

Naruto pouted. "Can we get to Baa-chan's office a little faster? I don't really have the stomach for this sort of thing right now."

Kakashi flipped open his porn. "What's the hurry? It's not like getting there a few seconds earlier will change your situation. Roll with it, I thought improvisation was your thing."

Jiraiya nodded with lidded eyes. "He's right you know. Try thinking of this as your vacation until your next mission."

Naruto smirked and shrugged. "Eh. I guess you're right."

They walked into the Hokage's tower and headed up the stairs when they saw that the elevator was still under repair, Jiraiya punched Naruto on the head as he had flashbacks of being hit in the face with a mahogany desk.

Naruto chuckled to himself as they ascended the stairs, he wasn't looking ahead, so he became confused when Kakashi and Jiraiya stopped walking. Jiraiya began to smirk and Naruto turned forward.

There was a head of pink hair just under his chin. The Kyuubi began laughing maniacally, as Naruto looked down at his teammate.

"Hey, Sakura-chan!"

Kakashi discreetly motioned for Naruto to distract Sakura so that she wouldn't be able to listen in on their mission report.

Meanwhile, Sakura was trying not to cut and run as far away as possible. The past few days, she'd been burying herself in work related things in a rather vain attempt to keep her mind off of Naruto and the emotional troubles he was causing her. Sakura recalled her training and managed to calm herself down, after all, _it was just Naruto._

That last thought was the biggest mistake Sakura made that day.

Kakashi eye-smiled. "You two can catch up, we'll go report in."

Sakura cleared her throat as she looked up at her teammate. "Naruto, what kind of mission did Hokage-sama send-"

Naruto cut her off by picking her up into a bear hug. "Nothing worth talking about! We never got to talk after you threw me out that day." When Naruto put her down, he narrowed his eyes and focused on her reaction to his statement.

Sakura shifted back and forth nervously as she stared at the ground. "Oh… sorry about that. I gotta go!" Sakura spun on her heels and walked in the opposite direction, she started to run up the stairs, but ran into Naruto, who somehow had moved between the time she turned around and the time she'd started running.

'I guess I can use this as a chance to figure her out.'

'**Good luck with that. Heh, females.'**

Naruto bent down and stared intently into her eyes, Sakura started to look the same color as her hair as the silence became longer and longer.

"Sakura-chan, you've been avoiding me ever since I got back. What's wrong?"

Sakura's eyes widened and she looked down for a few seconds, Naruto raised his eyebrow and stared at her until she looked back up at him, this time with a plastered on smile. Naruto could tell it was fake, but he wouldn't pry further, at least not this time anyway.

"Sorry Naruto, I'm just not used to you being around again, that's all."

Naruto grabbed her by the shoulders. "Sakura-chan, there's something I have to show you."

Naruto grabbed Sakura's hand and pulled her along, she unconsciously stared at his back as they went down the tower's stairwell and entered the lobby.

"What is it you want me to see Naruto?"

Naruto looked back at her and smiled. "It'd make more sense if I showed you."

Sakura, slightly reassured by Naruto's sincerity, ceased all resistance as he pulled her along. He squeezed Sakura's hand and she unconsciously squeezed back.

Naruto's nose twitched, as he wasn't used to that kind of response from Sakura.

'Heh, that's new.'

'**Let's fuck her.'**

'Shut up.'

The female staff in the lobby stared awestruck at Sakura, who Naruto had literally whisked away from a boring day on the job, like a knight in shining armor. Sakura eyed each and every one of her fellow employees as they stared at her with unabashed jealousy, she could read their whispering lips.

"_Lucky bitch."_

"_Her?"_

"_What I wouldn't give to be in her shoes."_

Naruto looked back at his teammate. "Why're you so quiet?"

Sakura was pale with raw confusion. "I… don't know." She took a long look at Naruto, he looked particularly stunning today, her eyes unintentionally glazed over, there was something different about him.

The longer Sakura looked at him, the more apparent it became… _he looked better than he did before he left. _It's like there was something in his eyes, his soul.

"Hey uh, Naruto-kun?"

Naruto turned slightly. "Kun?"

Sakura turned red. 'Shit! Did I say that out loud?'

Inner Sakura slammed her fist into her palm. _**'Just roll with it stupid!'**_

Sakura took her own advice and recovered. "Sorry! Does it bother you?"

Naruto smiled. "Nah, I'm just not used to anyone using that tone with me." Naruto was lying of course, but he didn't want anyone to know he'd lost his innocence quite yet; there was still some investigating to do.

Sakura stared at her teammate with a small tint of pity. 'He must not be used to all the attention he's getting nowadays.'

Naruto looked at her as they were crossing the road. "So what were you gonna ask me before?"

"Oh… You just seem different, that's all. I can tell you've cut your hair, but there's more to it than just that."

'**Give the pink female a hint.'**

"I guess I'm a lot more… aware than I was a week ago."

"How so?"

"I had a conversation with a friend, she gave me some valuable insight!"

Sakura narrowed her eyes suspiciously. "Who?"

Naruto gave her a foxy grin. "Anko-sensei."

"Oh, that's nice." Sakura's outward reply was rather calm and collected. Inwardly, an entirely different conversation was going on.

Inner Sakura was livid of course. **'SHANARROOOO! That BITCH probably fucked him! SHE'S GOIN' DOWN!'**

Sakura was almost on the verge of tears. 'What if she turned him into a womanizer? What if he only sees me as a piece of meat?'

Inner Sakura licked her lips. **'He can womanize me all he wants! Look at his arms, they look strong, don't they? I bet he can pin us against a wall and-'**

Sakura turned the same color as her hair again. 'No! Nonono! Conversation over!'

Sakura smiled, but was about ready to punch Naruto, he just had to give the wrong answer to her question. "So, what'd she teach you?"

Naruto paused and pieced together and answer vague enough to hide his "tutoring session" with Anko, but detailed enough to sate Sakura's curiosity. "She showed me that I'm actually worth something to other people, that I have people who truly care about me."

Sakura was stunned; she wondered how she neglected to paint out how much she and the others cared about Naruto. When Naruto left, the rest of the Rookie 9 would sit around a campfire and tell stories about the crazy missions they'd gone on with Naruto, and in the 2 ½ years he'd been gone, they'd never run out of stories. Sakura smiled, and for the first time, she gave him a genuine hug.

Naruto just stood there and stared at the top of her head as she hugged him. People began to stare at the two ninja as the hug went on. Sakura was rather well dressed for a normal day at work. This was a precaution she had taken since the day Naruto had gotten back. Being unkempt in his presence made her nervous and flighty, so looking at least half decent would ease her mind somewhat. They looked like they were on a date.

Naruto wriggled out of the hug and stared at Sakura worriedly.

"Are you sure your alr-… hey, you're a lot more dressed up than usual."

Sakura posed. "I went shopping a couple of days ago. Don't I appear more womanly to you?"

She spun and Naruto took a look at her, his eyes then zeroed in on Sakura's second most distinctive feature, after her hair of course. "Yeah… when did your butt get so big?"

Sakura scowled at Naruto and cracked her knuckles.

Naruto put his hands up and smiled nervously. "Relax! It was a compliment! Big butts are a good thing! ...But to more appropriately answer your question, you've matured a lot since those days… you dress better too!"

Naruto took a long look at her choice of attire for the day.

She was wearing a red tube top that showed her midriff, and a pink miniskirt with…very tight black shorts underneath. There was also a red choker around her neck with a green gem in the center; it was the same color as her eyes. This is what caught Naruto's attention.

"When'd you get that?" Naruto gestured toward Sakura's neck and she smiled a bit.

"You got it for my birthday, you don't remember?"

Naruto chuckled as he scratched the back of his head. "Heh! Guess not, but apparently you like it so I must've gotten it right!"

Sakura pouted, but stopped when she once again noticed the attention Naruto was drawing to them as they walked down the street. This time, it was different than what she picked up on in the Hokage's tower.

Sakura was rather confused though, the younger ones, girls specifically were glaring at her, no different from earlier, but the older people she saw looked as if Naruto was a ghost or something.

"_He looks just like the…"_

"_Well ain't that some shit! He's a carbon copy."_

Sakura looked back and forth between Naruto and the crowd, her teammate seemed to ignore the attention he drew.

Sakura tugged on Naruto's sleeve. "What's wrong with them?"

Naruto adjusted his sword shrugged. "Just comes with the territory I guess."

Sakura frowned. "What territory?"

Naruto pinched her cheeks; Sakura swung at him, but he somehow ducked through it and touched his forehead to hers. Sakura took a sharp breath and reflexively grabbed his chest, it was hard like steel, she looked at it and then at his eyes, much like the day at the ramen stand.

Naruto positioned her mouth into a smile and gave her his trademark grin. "Don't make that face, you'll wrinkle that beautiful forehead of yours."

Sakura giggled like a little girl, but when she recognized what had just happened, she slapped her hands over her mouth and tried to play it off like she was still mad at him. She glared at Naruto as she started to become impatient with this mystery destination. "Naruto… Where are we going?"

Naruto didn't say anything; he motioned for her to follow him and jumped to the nearest roof. They took off in a gust of wind; Sakura was becoming more and more confused as they moved into the ritzy side of Konoha.

"Are we… on a date or something?" Sakura sounded almost excited to Naruto.

Naruto looked back at her and smiled. "No, but we can do that later after I show you why I've been so busy."

Sakura gushed as she looked at the upscale restaurants and stores. There were stars in her eyes as her eyes darted around the streets below. "My family's never had enough money to afford _**anything**_ on this side of town. It's been a dream of mine to buy my mother a pearl necklace from one of those stores."

Naruto gave Sakura a thumbs-up. "That can be arranged at some point."

Sakura smiled at Naruto and for a second, she could swear that she wanted to kiss him. Sakura was about to disregard her thoughts but they became further complicated when Naruto took off into the air. Sakura followed suit and she was awestruck when she realized where she and Naruto were landing.

It was Konoha Park, Naruto offered his hand, Sakura anxiously took it as they walked down a path full of the blooming trees she was named after. Sakura stared at the trees, and then at Naruto, his back was to her, but the way that the sun hit him made him look familiar, but she couldn't figure out who he reminded her of. They finally reached a gate with a red swirl on it; there was a beautiful looking mansion on the other side of it at the end of a long stone pathway.

"For future reference, I live here. You probably had a few problems getting in touch with me yeah?"

Naruto touched the gate, and it slid open. The beauty of the grounds, and the sheer vividness of the flowers and trees threw Sakura for a loop.

"Naruto, this house belonged to the 4th Hokage and his wife, how'd you get it?"

Naruto turned around and placed his fists on his hips. "Funny story. Come on, you gotta meet everyone!"

"Everyone?"

As Naruto and Sakura entered the house, the staff dropped what they were doing and bowed to Naruto and Sakura.

They all greeted the pair in unison. "Welcome home Uzumaki-sama!"

Naruto smiled and waved. "Hey guys! This is Sakura Haruno, if she ever stops by and I'm not here, make her feel at home!"

The staff nodded and returned to their duties. Sakura caught movement in her peripheral vision. She turned and saw an intimidatingly beautiful girl with wavy black hair and neon green eyes.

"Hey Mitsuki-chan!" Naruto picked her up in a bear hug as Sakura stood there, eyeing this new girl suspiciously.

This 'Mitsuki' girl sighed and laughed to herself as Naruto put her down. Sakura crossed her arms and asked, rather standoffishly, "Who are you?"

Mitsuki smirked and looked at Naruto, and then back to Sakura, she gave Sakura a catty smile and cooed in a sultry voice. "I'm his escort. Uzumaki-sama is rather rough with me, but he's worth the bumps and bruises." Mitsuki grabbed one of Naruto's hands and licked her lips. "In fact, I'd be open to getting some new bruises tonight, as long as your girlfriend doesn't mind."

Mitsuki looked at Naruto with half-lidded eyes and continued teasing Sakura. "Or perhaps your lady friend would like to join us?"

Sakura turned pink as she huffed and glared at Naruto. She took a wide swing at her teammate, but he absentmindedly ducked under it as he was trying to figure out what Mitsuki meant by all that.

"NARUTOOOOO! Oh whatever! I don't care what you do in your bed with people you barely know!"

'**She smells angry. Angry sex?'**

'Hold on you horny bastard! What's so bad about being an escort? Isn't it like being a bodyguard or am I mistaken?'

Sakura started stomping toward the door, but Mitsuki called her name to get her attention, she laughed as she gestured for Sakura to calm down. "I was joking, I'm his personal attendant, bodyguard, and his staff director for the household, escorting isn't in my contract."

The Kyuubi licked his chops. **'Not yet at least, she's next on my list.'**

'Don't you ever shut up?! I'm still trying to figure out what this escort joke means.'

'**Why don't you ask the pink female to demonstrate?'**

Naruto mentally rolled his eyes as he inquired to his bodyguard. "Ne, Mitsuki-chan? Why's everyone get mad when you say that?"

Sakura had managed to curb her anger once she realized that Naruto wasn't in on the joke, and that he didn't even know what an escort was.

Sakura decided to explain it to her dense teammate and without any context, blurted out the answer. "Sex Naruto."

Naruto's heart sped up as he stared at the love of his life incredulously. "R-right now?"

Sakura turned crimson like her tank top as she gasped and covered her mouth. **"**N-no! I meant -oh god- I meant..." Sakura was completely flustered as she blurted out the rest of her sentece. "it's what escorts do for their employers from time to time!" She then started to make strange squeaking noises due to the maelstrom of mixed emotions she was experiencing at the moment.

'**SHANARROOOOO! STOP PASSING UP GOLDEN OPPORTUNITIES!'**

Naruto looked dejected after the reveal, he was rather looking forward to his next sexual encounter, especially if it would be with Sakura. "Oh… Okay."

Mitsuki walked over to Sakura and bowed. "Madam Haruno, I can arrange to have something eat or drink made for you."

Sakura ignored her and just stared at Naruto as he pouted in a corner after having his hopes dashed.

Mitsuki looked back and forth between Naruto and Sakura and smirked. "I'll take that as a no Madam Haruno."

Sakura walked over to Naruto and touched him on the shoulder. "You never told me how you got this house."

Naruto stood up and stuffed his hands in his pockets, he smiled at Sakura in anticipation, as if he would enjoy seeing her reaction.

"I live here now because I inherited this house."

Sakura's eyes nearly popped out of the sockets. "Waitwhatnow?"

"My parents owned this house, and now it's mine."

Sakura fainted… again.

(For those of you that skip the Author's Notes, there's a poll at the top of my profile page, it's for the 6th girl in Naruto's fanclub, Vote now, before this story ends up on an endless filler rotation like part 1 of Naruto.)

* * *

It's back to more crazy shenanigans for Naruto. That means that Hanabi and Hinata will be making more appearances, and you know what that means. At the time this was released, a female version of Gaara seems to be in the lead. Remember to check out the poll and vote.


	17. Chapter 17: Here They Come!

AN: What's up guys. As a good portion of you saw, Temari won the poll… however, it was only by one vote. Under normal circumstances, I'd have chosen her and began preparing to introduce her, but almost 100 of you voted. That 1 vote that she won by only constitutes 1% of the people who cared enough to vote. The top three were, Temari with 23 votes, and FemGaara &amp; Yugito tied with 22 votes each, a bit close, don't cha think? There's going to be a tiebreaker between these three posted at the top of my profile, and hopefully, there'll be a significant gap between the characters this time. Make sure you read the omakes at the end to give you a better idea of how to vote. Without further adieu, let's begin.

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'**So… when are we going to plant our seed in the pink female?'**

'_Who's we?' _

Naruto severed the mental connection as to avoid hearing a snide remark from his annoyingly sassy tenant, he really didn't want to deal with the fox, seeing as he had spent the past few hours at Sakura's house trying to figure out how he would deal with an undead Haku. Naruto managed stave off the stressful thoughts by going through Sakura's stuff. He went through her diary, nothing he hadn't seen before, just recounts of the day, and memories concerning Sasuke and team 7, however, the daily entries stopped on the day he returned. Naruto found this rather odd but payed it no mind. After snooping around, Naruto had gone to raid the fridge, but was once again disappointed.

Naruto looked at the passed out girl on the couch in bewilderment. "Man, I keep forgetting you don't have any food in your house." He opted to go for the fruit, since it was at least tolerable.

When Sakura came to, she was once again on the couch in her house, and several hours had passed. It was now dark outside, and much like the first time, Naruto was rummaging through her fridge complaining to himself about the inordinate number of healthy foods she kept around.

Sakura sat up on the couch and stared at the blonde enigma before her, the cogs in her mind turned furiously.

'… As long as I've known Naruto, I've known so little about him, and he probably considers me one of his best friends. I know his hopes, but not his fears, I don't even know his '_real'_ name anymore, or his story for that matter. Yet, he's been right there with me when I needed him most, and now, I have even less of an idea of who he is.'

"Hey, Naruto-kun?"

Naruto turned to her with a mouthful of grapes. "Hm?"

"You're… changing faster than I can get to know you. We never really got the chance to catch up did we? How does right now sound?"

Naruto gulped down the fruit and smiled. "Sure. Well… I've been pretty busy training these past few y-"

Sakura put her finger over his mouth and smiled. "No, I want you to start from the beginning, _the very beginning_."

They talked for several hours, and Naruto learned how his teammate had spent the last 2 ½ years. He probably would have ended up sleeping over had he not remembered he needed to collect his paycheck from Konoha City Hall since it would be closing soon.

After Naruto left, Sakura had elected to take a shower and relax for the rest of the night. After she got out of the shower, she curled up on her couch and started to watch TV. Sakura shifted slightly and something sharp poked her on the rear-end. Sakura hopped of the couch and began searching for the culprit, it was Naruto's necklace. Somehow, it had fallen between the couch cushions. Sakura knew how important to him it was, so she looked at the clock. It was only 8:00, so she dried her hair and put on a cropped jacket.

'_Maybe I __**can**__ get him to stay over for the night._'

"Gah! Where'd _that _come from?" Inner-Sakura rolled her eyes at her counterpart as she started queuing up possible locations Naruto could be in.

* * *

For Ino, it had been once again a slow afternoon. She'd been running the flower shop for God knows how long until her mother finally stepped in to for the rest of the night. With a much-needed reprieve from flowers and fluorescent lighting, Ino took a stroll through the streets of Konoha.

It was a day like any other, Ino receiving wolf whistles and howls from all directions, but none of that mattered now, seeing as she'd found a new pursuit worthy of her time. She'd heard through the grapevine that Naruto was back from his mission. Ino took it upon herself to seek out the young man, but with nothing to go on, she'd need a different kind of help, and it just happened to be her lucky day.

Not twenty feet in front of her was Hanabi Hyuuga, who was staring holes in an extremely worried merchant. The look on her face belied mild frustration and eagerness.

"Why won't you give them to me? I believe I have sufficient currency to purchase them."

The merchant tried to reason with her. "Listen kid, I just don't feel right sellin' these to you. How old are you anyway?"

"I'm 10. However, my age is irrelevant in this matter."

Ino surveyed the situation for a few seconds as she tried to calculate how she could spin this to her advantage, but without enough information to go on, she decided to gamble on Hinata's little sister.

Ino slyly interrupted the dispute. "Actually sir, they're for me. I needed the little one's help with some errands today. Sorry to inconvenience you."

Hanabi took whatever she was buying from the merchant and Ino ushered the young girl away from the stand. When they were a good distance from the stand, Hanabi started to to stuff the mystery items into her black and purple backpack, but Ino stopped her and deftly took the boxes out of Hanabi's hands.

"At least let me see what I bailed you out for."

Hanabi sighed. "Fair enough ma'am."

"Call me Ino." She took the boxes out of the black sack and froze. "You're Hinata's little sister right?"

"That's correct."

"_Please_ tell me you bought this stuff for her."

"No, they're not for her."

Ino shuddered. "… What the hell do _you_ need with… lube, aphrodisiacs, and… vibrating… ribbed condoms? Better yet, WHO ARE YOU USING THEM WITH SO I CAN KICK HIS ASS!"

Hanabi hopped into the air and snatched the boxes out of Ino's hands. The preteen put them into her backpack and decided to answer her benefactor.

"These items are for the enjoyment of Naruto Uzumaki and myself."

Ino's skin turned bright red and steam started to billow out of her mouth as she seethed at the thought of Naruto corrupting someone so young. "Oh _hell_ no."

* * *

Jiraiya had left his overcoat in Tsunade's office several hours earlier, so he was on his way back to go grab it, little did he know, that this trip would be quite a bit more than he bargained for.

When he walked into Tsunade's office, the first thing he noticed, was the fact that she'd had a new desk brought in, and unlike the others, this one was bolted to the floor, likely Shizune's idea. The next thing, or in this case _things_ Jiraiya looked at were of course, Tsunade's breasts.

Now, if it weren't for the low cut kimono she wore, he'd have noticed the raw anger on her face, and her visible drunkenness.

"JIRAIYA!"

The sudden yelling snapped him from his leering.

"Tsunade-hime?"

She drunkenly slurred her words, but the decades of dealing with his alchoholic teammate/ex-girlfriend (sort of)/only real friend allowed him to hear her as if she were sober. "What day is it?"

"Eh. Tuesday?"

Her eye twitched as the rosy tint in her cheeks made Jiraiya worry about her drunken tendency to become violent at the drop of a hat.

"No, _Jiraiya_… It's our anniversary. I made sure to remind you after we debriefed, but I guess you were too busy staring at my tits to hear me." She was barely intelligible, but due to his years of experience with a drunken Tsunade, Jiraiya subconsciously translated every word as he began to fear for his life.

"See I came to meet you, for our uh…" Jiraiya counted the dates on his fingers. "First date anniversary!"

"Two hours late? You came back for your overcoat, _asshole_. I bet you spent the day peeping at all those _other_ girls." She took another drag from her bottle of sake.

Jiraiya took the time to notice that she'd made his favorite dinner and had set up several candles around the room.

Jiraiya face-palmed at his own inattentiveness and sat down across from Tsunade, instead of hitting him like usual, she clumsily poured him a cup of sake. "Ya didn't poison this did ya?"

She scowled at him as she dug into the Karaage Chicken she'd made. "… Sorry Tsunade."

At the same time, someone, somewhere else was scowling. Naruto was at city hall, collecting his paycheck for the mission… if one could even call it a paycheck.

"WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?!"

"Sorry Mr. Uzumaki, direct orders from the Hokage."

"HOW DOES THIS EVEN WORK?! IT'S A NEGATIVE PAYCHECK!"

The mission was originally paying for 150,000 Ryou, but amidst the black ink on the paycheck, there were red marks everywhere, and a note from Tsunade on it.

'You owe me an elevator, two mahogany desks, and two sets of office doors. I deducted it from your paycheck, but you're still short 2,000 Ryou, so you still owe me. Have a nice day Naruto-kun. ~Obaa-chan'

There was doodle of her carrying several stacks of cash into a casino below the signature. Naruto huffed and walked out of city hall, very, very, slowly. He needed to go give the old lady a piece of his mind.

* * *

To say that Anko was horny was a gross understatement. After her little adventure with Naruto in the woods, she was literally itching for another ride on her new favorite boy toy. Being the forward thinking ninja she was, she been working out her urges on the heavy bag she installed in her apartment, as she knew that the wait would be longer than she wanted, but shorter than she expected. Sadly for Anko, beating on a giant bag of sand can only curb one's sexual desires for so long, and eventually, it began to tug at Anko's inner sadomasochist.

Fully understanding the futility and the actual counter-productivity of hitting a sandbag, she opted to go hunt down her target, but without the faintest idea of where to find him, she decided to call in a favor from 'Tsunade-Onee-chan'.

Anko took a 4 and a half minute shower, she was always meticulous like that, and squeezed into a distractingly tight and backless halter top, after that, Anko grabbed her keys and threw on her signature miniskirt.

She had foregone putting on a bra in anticipation of running into Naruto that night; it'd make it easier to drag him into her den for the night, not to mention the ease of access when the clothes started to hit the floor.

Anko licked her lips and took a leisurely stroll to the Hokage's tower, which by coincidence was where Naruto... and everyone else was headed.

* * *

Ino was furiously stomping down the street with a squirming Hanabi in tow. She was searching frantically for Naruto, but in her anger, she'd forgotten who she was with.

Hanabi snapped Ino out of her rage when she inquired. "Are you searching for Uzumaki-san?"

Ino paused and her raging demeanor flipped to a kind one in an instant. "Yes. You wouldn't mind helping me would you?"

"On the condition you promise not to attack him. Your motivations seem questionable at the moment."

Ino was lying through her teeth as she answered the 10 year old. "Oh, no. I just wanna talk to him!"

Hanabi, while intelligent, was rather short on social skills, so she took Ino's reply at face value. She flipped her Byakugan on and off and pointed toward the Hokage tower. "I believe he's headed toward the tower."

"Then that's where we're going! … Why were you out by yourself at this hour?"

"I asked Neji-san to take me out for ice cream. I escaped while he was making the purchase so I could buy our c-."

Ino slapped her hand over Hanabi's mouth as they were on a crowded street, she nearly punched the nearest bystander at Hanabi's usage of 'our'. The last thing Ino needed was to be under suspicion of the corruption of minors, so she silently trudged on toward the tower.

* * *

Naruto rode the newly replaced elevator until he reached the top floor. In his frustration, he'd totally forgotten what happened the last three times he'd kicked the door in, so he of course, planted his foot in the wood.

A shock of pain raced up Naruto's leg as the door didn't budge from the kick.

"Chakra reinforced. Heh."

Naruto was about to twist the knob when he heard yelling from inside the door, it was Ero-Sannin. The thickness of the door prevented him from hearing, so for the first time in his life, Naruto quietly pulled the door open and walked in. Ero-Sannin was in a yelling match with Obaa-chan, and it was obvious that they were both rather drunk.

Naruto, also used to dealing with drunkenese translation, was able to convert their conversation into intelligible language. Naruto however, found the conversation rather awkward to sit in on. Obaa-chan looked rather pouty and angry with Ero-Sannin, who in his drunken stupor, was much more standoffish than usual.

Tsunade pointed at Jiraiya in disgust as she rattled off his mistakes. "You're –hic- the one that –hic- ran away as soon as things started getting serious! What happened to 'I'll –hic- marry you someday' huh?!"

Jiraiya burped and rolled his eyes as he sloshed back. "You drank too much then, and you –hic- drink too much now. Not to mention your gambling problems, I'm surprised you nearly got me to –hic- propose!"

Tsunade slammed her desk and the building shook. "Nobody's perf-hic- …perfect, and you're especially one to -hic- talk. I may have been drunk on the sake –hic- but you were drunk on every-hic-thing else! You ran off chasing some floozy every chance you –hic- got."

Jiraiya managed to hold down some puke as he retorted in his own drunken language. "I was waiting for you ta stop with all the –hic- gambling –hic- and drinking… and-" Jiraiya fell backward and stumbled around the room for a few seconds as he tried to find his bearings.

"Tsunade-hime… what'd you –hic- put in that sake?"

"It's double –hic- concentrated, it'd probably have killed –hic- normal people by now… DON'T CHANGE THE –hic- SUBJECT YOU INSENSITIVE MORON!" Tsunade also began to struggle to hold down her own vomit.

"I was goin' through a –hic- a rough patch in life. "

Jiraiya gave a condescending burp… however the hell that was possible. "-hic- Well why're ya still –hic- pissin' away all yer cash and…" Jiraiya passed out before he could finish his sentence.

Tsunade glared at Jiraiya and took another drag of her concentrated sake, it was then that she noticed Naruto and Shizune, who'd also walked in somewhere during the argument.

Tsunade stumbled over to Naruto and gave him a back crunching hug. "Psshhh. Minato-kun, -hic- promise me you won't end up like us, -hic- still bickering in our old age."

Naruto just stared blankly at the event he'd just witnessed, that and he began drawing parallels to his own life. He began to wonder if his relationship with Sakura would begin to mirror this one based on how the situation with Sasuke was solved.

Shizune realized that Naruto wouldn't be moving for a few more minutes, so she hoisted Tsunade over her shoulder and plopped her back in her chair. Tsunade began to protest, but she fell back into her chair when she tried to stand. Since moving wouldn't be an option, she began trying to wake Jiraiya, seeing as she wasn't finished with him yet.

Shizune surveyed the room, and to her surprise, their little anniversary was much less destructive than it had been in previous years. Shizune then pulled Naruto out of Tsunade's office and shut the door.

Naruto finally snapped out of his realization of how similar team 7 was to the Sannin and whirled around to face Shizune.

"What did I just witness?"

Shizune sighed. "It's rather simple. Their relationship was severely damaged by extenuating circumstances and their own personal ways of coping with their grief got in the way… It's rather sad really. When Tsunade-sama first took me on as an apprentice, I was almost sure that she'd marry Jiraiya-sama, but I guess the life of a shinobi ran it's course on them. She may have been drunk, but she did give you some really good advice."

Naruto worriedly scratched the back of his head as he called the elevator and stepped in with Shizune.

"Ne, Shizune-Onee-chan? How will I know if someone is right for me?"

Shizune jumped when she didn't really have an answer. "Ahii! What?"

Naruto placed his hands behind his head as he stared at the floor indicator. "You seem experienced, so I'd figured you'd know."

"Well –ahem- it just happens when it's supposed to… yeah, that's right. You'll know when the time comes." Shizune attempted to give her best answer, but sort of trailed off as she lost her train of thought.

Naruto smiled and gave her a thumbs-up as he stepped off the elevator. "Thanks for the advice!"

'… Why'm I askin' Shizune-Onee-chan? She's an old maid!'

The Kyuubi licked his chops as took a look at Shizune's breasts through Naruto's eyes. _**'Weeeellll, you can change that for her right… right?'**_

'_Are you insane? I have enough women to deal with as is.'_

Naruto waved goodbye to Shizune as the elevator door shut. He spun on his heels and strolled out the tower's front door. The air was cool, and the sky was a nice twilight color. The streets of Konoha began to awake for the night, with paper lanterns lining the streets, advertising shops, or just lighting the way. In all of the energy of a Konoha night, Naruto failed to notice the girl standing in front of him.

Naruto looked at her for a second and mentally slapped his forehead as the years of clues and messages compiled in his mind and he finally came to a conclusion. Hinata was standing in front of him, looking flustered, yet extremely determined.

'... She likes me too doesn't she. At least I know she's being sincere, she's been in my corner since day one.'

Hinata took several deep breaths as she walked closer to Naruto and began to talk.

Her small voice squeaked out just enough for Naruto to hear. "Naruto-kun? I want to say a few things to you."

Naruto pulled up his signature fox grin. "What's up Hinata-chan? I can see that you recognize me this time... I will admit that I _did_ need a haircut, so no harm done."

Hinata gave a sigh of relief and her face went from tomato red to a light pink… a slight improvement.

Hinata pressed her fingers together. "That's one thing out of the way. I've been wanting to ask you this for years, but... it seems I have to hurry up because everybody wants you to be their boyfriend now."

Naruto stared at her in surprise. "I forgot you lost your stutter."

Hinata's mouth turned upward into a little smile and she bowed to him. "Thank you Naruto-kun. I… I'd like to ask if we could go on a date... If it's okay with you."

Naruto looked at her and smiled a bit, she was completely adorable, so he just couldn't refuse. Naruto grabbed her hands and gave her a small nod.

"Of course we can go on a date Hinata-chan."

Hinata smiled as her face turned red again and she fainted into Naruto's arms. Naruto stood there for a second and groaned.

"Why's this always happen to me?"

'**I spy a golden opportunity!'**

'... She's passed out you ass.'

The Kyuubi smirked and wagged his tails as he surveyed the younger, bigger, more promising pair of breasts.

'**And you know what that means… she can't say no.'**

'Shut up.'

Unbeknownst to our hero, the Uzumaki Fan Club... plus a few uninvited guests were fast approaching his current location.

* * *

**AN: Omake Time! This is a little something I'm going to be doing from now on. This first Omake sesh will help give you guys an Idea of how I'm going to write each of our three tiebreaker contestants. The new poll is at the top of my profile page, but you should read these before you vote, it's a sneak peak at how I'd write these three characters.**

* * *

**Temari ~ Kazekage's Tower**

Temari cocked her head to the side. "Hey… I know you."

Naruto looked closely at Temari and snapped his fingers as he recognized her. "Yeah… you're the one who gave that stabby girl spinal fractures in the chuunin exams."

"And _you _kicked the crap out of your village's prodigy or something right? It threw me for a loop when you used the Kyuubi's chakra to force open your tenketsu."

Naruto narrowed his eyes in confusion. "How'd you-"

"I'm Temari, Gaara's sister, I know what I saw when you fought."

"Ooooooh, okay. That explains why you've got his scary ass eyes."

Temari eyed Naruto up and down with mild interest. "Puberty hit you like a train. You're not such a midget anymore."

Naruto eyed her back with a blank expression; she was rather tall for a girl, only about two inches shorter than himself. He put his hands behind his head and beamed.

"Yeah, I get that a lot, I didn't eat right as a kid, so I made up the lost time these past few years."

Temari put a hand on his chest and smirked. "So you've grown _a lot _right? That means everywhere doesn't it?"

Naruto straightened his haori and put his arms out to his sides in a provoking gesture. "I don't know, do you wanna find out?"

Temari stepped close to him as if she were about to kiss him, their lips were hovering millimeters apart. Naruto could feel the heat of her breath on his face and moved to close the remaining gap between their lips. Temari smirked and spun 180 degrees. With her back to him, she tilted her head backward until she could smirk at Naruto in jest.

"Have you no taste? Buy a girl dinner first, and _maybe _I'll consider letting you hold my hand." She yanked Naruto's belt in a taunting manner and sauntered off.

Naruto loosened his belt and took a deep breath to relieve the sexual tension Temari had stirred in him.

Temari smirked at him and she walked away, she made sure Naruto noticed the exaggerated swing in her hips as she turned the corner.

The Kyuubi mused to himself.

'**Oh she won't be able to walk straight for **_**days**_** when I'm through with her. Hunting her down will be entertaining.'**

'Ya know, for once, I'm not in _complete_ conflict with what you're saying.'

* * *

**AN:Temari's going to be a bit of a tease in this story, so she'll sort of be a halfway point between Anko and Ino if that makes any sense, less overt sexual advances than Anko, and less masterminding than Ino. Honestly, it seems kinda vanilla to me, and since we already have Anko and Ino, I personally think Temari will be sort of redundant. The votes don't lie however.**

* * *

**Female Gaara ~ Hokage's Tower**

Tsunade had her feet propped up on her desk as she spoke with her favorite moronic ninja.

"I have some good news and some bad news Naruto-kun, which first?"

Naruto scratched his head. "Bad first."

"I've called you here to brief you on your next S-Rank assignment."

Naruto raised his eyebrow. "How's that a bad thing?"

"It's an escort mission."

Naruto groaned and sunk back into his chair. He grumbled to himself as he gave Tsunade his next inquiry.

"Okay… so what's the good news?"

Tsunade smirked. "You'll be showing the Kazekage around the village until her business here is complete."

Naruto stared at Tsunade in silence for several seconds. "Obaa-chan? I don't think I'm understanding the good news yet."

The 5th Hokage laughed to herself. "Come on in." Naruto's expression was blank as she walked through the door. She wore knee high ninja sandals, and around her waist was a red sash that served as a skirt, she wore some black compression shorts beneath the sash. She also wore a rather low-cut shoulderless t-shirt and a brown leather chest guard. Her hair was long, red, and straight, and she had blank, yet vibrant turquoise eyes. Lastly, there was a… large gourd stuck to her back by forces unknown.

Naruto's heart turned into a maelstrom of raw emotion as he realized who this red-haired girl was. He stood up and walked over to her.

"… It's been a long time, Naruto." Her voice was sultry yet light, it made Naruto start beaming.

Naruto started to tear up a bit as he pulled the petite redhead into a bear hug and started to talk to her.

"You're the Kazekage now? … I'm-" Naruto got choked up and paused to keep his composure. Naruto let go of Gaara in order to wipe his eyes for a second. Gaara, not being the most emotional of girls awkwardly reached up and put her arm around his shoulder, it was rather strange due to the height difference, but Gaara made it work.

"Naruto, don't cry, I'm not good with that sort of thing. Tears… confuse me."

Naruto wiped his eyes and took a good look at Gaara, she was pretty, but for Naruto, that was beside the point. "Say uh, Gaara? What's your business here, and why'd you request me specifically? Bodyguards are sort of redundant for ya aren't they?"

Gaara's gaze bored into Naruto's face and for a second, Naruto caught a small twitch in her lip, Naruto heard something, but he couldn't quite figure out what it was, it was a shrill and faint voice

The Kyuubi rattled the bars of his cage. '**Just my luck, I hate this fat bastard.'**

Naruto appeared in his mindscape. 'What now?'

The fox growled through bared fangs. **'Shukaku, he's talking shit again…'**

Naruto crossed his arms and peered up at his tenant. 'I don't really hear that much.'

'**It's because you're retarded, the female container can hear me just fine.'**

Gaara nodded in the real world to affirm this.

Minscape Naruto scrunched up his nose. 'What? I'm not retarded, why can't I hear him?'

'**She's muzzling him, a trick you seem to have forgotten.' The fox growled and punched his cage. 'STILL SOUNDS LIKE NAILS ON A CHALKBOARD TO ME! This clown's the weakest of us so all he does is talk shit!' The Kyuubi clawed at his cage.**

Meanwhile, in another mindscape…

The Shukaku thrashed around and roared in the vast desert that was Gaara's mindscape. '**LEMME SHOW THAT ARROGANT PRICK WHAT'S WHAT! THINKIN' HE'S BETTER THAN ME CAUSE HE'S GOT MORE TAILS? BULLSHIT I TELLS YA!**

Gaara covered her ears and scowled at her tenant. 'I told you to be quiet… unless you've forgotten that this is _my _mind.'

Sand started to flare up around Gaara as she began to walk toward the giant beast. Shukaku's eyes widened and he sat down on his haunches, opting to shut up instead of being beaten to a pulp.

'No wonder I still couldn't sleep after I had my seal improved, shut up, or I'll chain you where you stand, permanently.' The tailed beast shivered at the matter-of-factness in her tone and looked off toward the horizon.

Tsunade was rather confused at the moment, Naruto and Gaara had been staring at each other in silence for nearly thirty seconds when her calls finally got their attention.

The Hokage pointed to the scrolls Gaara had strapped to her sash. "Oi! You were saying, Gaara-chan?"

Gaara looked at Naruto and blushed a bit. "Right… uhm. Sunagakure wants to discuss a treaty with Konoha, however, my village council has one rather… strange demand aside from the usual treaty agreements."

Tsunade perked up at this bit of information and took her feet off of her desk. "What'd they have in mind?"

Gaara blushed a bit more as she turned to Naruto, yet somehow, she still kept that blank expression. "We want Naruto."

Naruto pouted. "Like how? … I'm not moving there if that's what they want! Too much dust and humidity!"

Tsunade raised her eyebrow. "Elaborate Gaara-chan."

Naruto jumped onto Tsunades desk and looked her in the eye. "Nani?! You're actually considering this?! How do you think-!"

Gaara cut Naruto off and answered the Hokage, there was a dash of pink on her face as she spoke. "If possible… they want to join our villages through a political marriage, and they want me and Naruto to…" Gaara stared at the ground and clasped her hands together in a joining gesture.

Tsunade looked at Naruto and smirked. "Why?"

"We already know who you're going to choose as the next Hokage, It's no secret among the five nations. Suna wants to ensure that there wont be any hostility between us in the near future."

Tsunade thought for a second and smiled. "I bet there's more to it than that, hmmm? There's something you're not telling us Gaara-chan."

Gaara fidgeted for a moment and her smooth voice wavered as she spoke to the 5th Hokage. "The marriage was my idea to begin with."

You two go on out for a day and test the water, I'll think about it."

Naruto didn't have much of a problem with this, but the principal of it was what annoyed him the most. He was about to give Tsunade a piece of his mind, but the sound of her cracking knuckles relayed her message. 'Shut up, Naruto.'

* * *

**AN:FemGaara will be Naruto's foil, kind of like a new Sasuke, only with more sexual tension and less antagonizing. Gaara is the most established character of the three, so she'll be easier to write, and will add some diversity to the story's comedic style. Also, the Kyuubi and Shukaku will be butting heads, so prepare for some witty back and forth. For those of you that don't trust it, don't worry, FemGaara is really hard to get wrong.**

* * *

Yugito ~ Kumo Training Grounds

"Who're you brat?"

Naruto cocked his head to the side and gave her the stink eye. "Ya know, insulting people right of the bat is a good way to get your ass kicked."

"Whatever. I have this training ground reserved for noon, it's noon."

'This bitch.'

There was a rumbling growl inside Naruto's head. **'I'm more inclined to kill her than fuck her. She seems… annoying.'**

Yugito shuddered for a second and glared at Naruto. "What'd you say?"

Naruto poked his tongue out. "Nothing lady, that wasn't me."

Yugito stared at Naruto intently. "Which one are you?"

Naruto raised an eyebrow. "What now?"

Yugito grabbed Naruto by the collar. "You're a Jinchuuriki aren't you?" There was an orange flash of light and Naruto was several feet away from her.

Naruto's eye twitched in annoyance. "I don't really care to let you know, you're kinda mean. See ya pretty lady."

Before Yugito could grab him again, he was gone in a flash of Orange light.

Naruto bounded from tree to tree and made a beeline for the Raikage's office in the hopes that Bee could teach him something instead.

'I get the feeling we'll be seeing a lot more of her.'

'**Hope not. She's Nibi-chan's container.'**

'Heh, Nibi-chan? I still can't imagine you giving a shit about anyone.'

'**I don't, she's been stalking me since… forever. Fuck a girl once and they keep coming back, she's… a handful, please don't tell her I'm here, it's hard enough being stuck in your gut, I don't need her meowing behind to worry about too.'**

Naruto just laughed at the idea of the Kyuubi having girl problems and continued on his way.

"This'll be interesting for sure."

'**You're not talking to me are you?'**

'Shut up.'

* * *

**AN:Yugito and Naruto will have a sort of love-hate relationship. Naruto thinks she's arrogant and immature for her age, and she finds him impulsive and annoying… but they wanna fuck each other. The Kyuubi also has some history with Nibi, so that'll be interesting too.**

* * *

**Really think about who you vote for, because there's no turning back once the polls close.**

Breath of the Wiz, Signin' Off

~ Stay gold.


	18. Chapter 18: Here They Are!

AN: If you want to know who won the poll, take a look at it, I'll go into more detail concerning it when we start getting into the Suna arc w/ Deidara, Sasori, and the like. Side note… I read the Naruto Manga epilogue... total garbage. **SPOILERS** **AHEAD** **if you don't like them, just skip down to the chapter… Gone? Okay**. The thing that pisses me off the most is the SasuSaku pairing. In my mind, it's an overall, illogical pairing when looking back over the entire manga, yeah, Sasuke showed flashes of caring for her in part 1, but I think his actions in part II overshadowed all that. Sasuke doesn't give a shit about Sakura, and anyone trying to defend this pairing needs a reality check. If not Naruto, it would have made more sense for her to end up with Lee after the time skip, Sasuke just has too much shit on his mind to be a half-decent father for anyone. Love and affection for a family doesn't seem like his cup of tea. That's just my overall opinion, anyway, lets get into the story.

* * *

Naruto stared at the unconscious Hinata, she looked so peaceful, with that smile. It had only been about thirty seconds until her eyes snapped open again.

Hinata became embarrassed. "I'm sorry Naruto-kun. I just didn't expect you to say yes so readily."

Naruto stood up and placed Hinata on her feet, he eyed the Hyuga with curiosty as he inquired "Ne, Hinata-chan? How long have you had feelings for me?"

Hinata blushed and smiled as she looked at the ground. "In all honesty… it's been so long that I can't remember. I –heheh- I've been in love with you since... forever."

Naruto put his hands behind his head and laughed to himself. "Thanks for giving a damn before everyone else got the same idea. Sorry I didn't catch on earlier, I'm not too keen on this whole flirting thing, or… Just people in general, they're not really my strong suit."

Hinata got a worried look on her face and moved to comfort Naruto, her voice was full of remorse. "No, it was my fault, I should have worked up my courage and been more forward!"

Naruto pulled her into a hug and chuckled. "Don't worry about it! So when's this date of ours? Preferably sooner than later I hope!"

Hinata pressed her fingers together and started thinking. "I'll be ready in two days. Let's meet here… at seven. Is that okay Naruto-kun? " A look of raw determination adorned her face. Naruto found her facial expression jarring, scary almost, so he nooded, dumbly. Naruto could tell, Hinata was the kind of person that you didn't want to make angry. Naruto's imagination was split in half by a piercing sound.

"NARUTO!"

Naruto turned and looked at Ino, who appeared to be really angry with him for some reason.

Naruto laughed nervously. "H-Hey, Ino-chan… Why're you looking at me like that? I didn't do anything to you..." Naruto got even more nervous. "Was it something i _didn't _do?"

Ino cracked her knuckles as a vein on her temple started to bulge out. "_Oh it's not me I'm angry about_."

Naruto stared blanky at Ino. "Seriously, what'd I do?"

Just as he said that, Naruto felt a small tug on the back of his shirt. Naruto turned around and saw Hinata, who was as white as snow. Naruto felt another tug and looked down, and he saw the top of a young girl's head. She looked up at him with her big lavender eyes in a pleading manner.

"Uzumaki-san, I'm ready for you to deflower me."

"Huh?"

Naruto just stared down at her with a blank expression as he started to add things up.

The Kyuubi weighed the consequences as he scratched his chin. **'Hmm. If you take a mate young, they won't leave you alone, **_**however…**_** it **_**does**_** inspire obedience and loyalty, you'll have a useful thrall at your disposal.'**

'… Ya know, at this point, I'm not even surprised pedophillia is on your resume.'

'**Don't knock it until you try it, she'll probably do **_**anything**_** you want.  
I know you're actually considering it.'**

'_Maybe ten years from now! Seriously, what's wrong with you_? _She's like... 9 or something!_'

'**I'm a bijuu remember? A demon. Human rules don't concern me, now, make your decision wisely, you won't be able to corrupt her to your banner if you wait for a decade.'**

'Honestly**, **I don't know whether to laugh at you or vomit.'

As Naruto was engaged in his inner monologue, he failed to realize that Sakura and Neji were also with Ino. Neji's Byakugan was already on, and Sakura's eye was twitching, really, really fast as she slammed her fist into her open palm with an echoing thump. The familiar sound snapped Naruto back into the situation at hand.

'**I think we should run, kit.'**

'No! I need to set the record straight, if I don't, this may never get fixed! Besides, Mitsuki-chan's in that tree over there and I can outrun the girls, Mitsuki can help me with Neji if that's the case. I _seriously_ gotta talk them down though, Obaa-chan will kill us if we start fighting in the street!'

The Kyuubi grabbed the bridge of his nose. **'It's your ass. If you get beat down, I'm not healing you.'**

Sakura was the first to yell at Naruto for his supposed depravity. "Wha- Why're you smiling dammit! This isn't funny!"

Naruto scratched the back of his head. "I just haven't seen you guys for longer than a few minutes since I've been back." Naruto nervously put his hands up. "Can't we talk this over? It's probably all a joke, right Hanabi-chan?"

Hanabi started at Naruto blankly. "I do not joke, Uzumaki-san. I can understand your apprehension due to my age, so I bought these, they should alleviate any of your concerns." She reached into her backpack and showed Naruto several small boxes.

Naruto took one of them from Hanabi, and started to laugh when he read the label. "Vibrating condoms? pfffffffft! HAHAHAHA! That's awesome! Hanabi-chan, where'd you find these?"

Hanabi was about to answer, but was cut of by Neji's accusing voice. "YOU DARE MAKE LIGHT OF THIS MATTER?!" Neji charged Naruto so quickly that there was an explosion of dust where he originally stood.

'Oh yeah, they think I'm a deviant or something.'

'**Wow, ****"Deviant", I didn't know that word was in your vocabulary. Sooo, are w****e running or not?'**

Hinata stepped in front of Naruto. "Wait! Hanabi is-!"

Neji was caught off guard by his cousin's actions, so he failed to notice the pair of bright green eyes in his Byakugan's peripheral vision. In a swift motion, Mitsuki grabbed Neji's wrist and body slammed him into the ground. He summarily popped back up and attempted to get around Mitsuki, who tripped him again and slammed him into the ground.

Sakura and Ino took this as an opportunity to rush past Mitsuki and beat some sense into Naruto, who just stood there looking exasperated. He had the nerve to be _spectating_ a fight that he was the cause of.

Without looking behind her, Mitsuki threw out a pair of chains with weighted ends. One chain managed to trip Sakura, who was the least agile in the group. Ino however, somersaulted over the chain meant for her, and kept sprinting toward Naruto.

"Out of the way Hinata!"

Hinata's soft voice was somehow heard through the commotion. "No Ino-san! Don't touch him!"

Hinata's expression was lost somewhere between worried and angry as she dropped into her stance.

"I'm warning you Ino!"

Ino hadn't slouched in her training over the past few years, especially after hearing about Sakura taking a spot beneath the Hokage. She'd been training her flexibility and agility non-stop over the years, and it showed, she wasn't the fastest of the rookie nine, but she was sure as hell the hardest to hit with anything. Even then, she had to make sure Hinata didn't so much as touch her, Ino had sparred with Hyuga ninja before, and getting hit by Juken strikes caused lacerations and internal bleeding, something Ino wanted to avoid for the night.

Hinata began pivoting and sliding in circular motions to maneuver herself in front of Ino. The Yamanaka adjusted her footwork to mirror Hinata's in mid stride and weaved through the Hyuga heiress' line of attack. The kunoichi were back-to-back as they spun in a circle, they'd rotated about ninety degrees when Ino exited the spin in a dead sprint.

"Naruto you pervert! You're goin' down!" Ino was about to plant both her feet in Naruto's mouth when an understandably angry Hinata tackled her in mid air.

"LET GO OF ME HINATA! THAT'S YOUR LITTLE SISTER HE'S MESSING WITH!"

Hinata struggled to keep the squirming Ino in her grip. "If you would just listen to me you'd understand!"

Naruto started to take a few steps in the opposite direction of the tussle as he mused to himself. 'So much for the "Gentle Fist". She's just wrestling now.'

Hinata, in her distress, had abandoned her usual fighting style, and just opted to keep Konoha's Ice Queen wrapped up in a bear hug. Every time Ino would squirm out, Hinata would tackle her before she could get to Naruto. This was when Sakura managed to rip apart the metal chains wrapped around her ankles. After springing to her feet, she went after Naruto again.

Sakura was really angry right now, so she wasn't filtering her words. "BAKAAAA! DON'T THINK YOU'RE GETTING OUT OF THIS UNSCATHED! YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO SPEND THE NIGHT WITH MEEE!" These were likely the words of her inner-self being spoken.

Sadly, Naruto didn't have time to process what Sakura said because he heard a loud whoosh as Hanabi zoomed past him. She emulated her older sisters' circular motions and made a full spin toward the charging bull that was Sakura Haruno. The pinkette was so surprised by the conviction and grace shown in Hanabi's movements that she forgot to block the incoming attack. Hanabi planted both her palms into Sakura's abdomen with a dull thud, the instant they made contact, there was a burst of chakra that let off a weak gust of wind. Sakura was consequentially sent flying into a cabbage stand, the unfortunate stand promptly exploded into a shower of wood planks and pulverized cabbages.

"MY CABBAGES!"

Hanabi's blank expression somehow conveyed mild to severe annoyance as she spoke in an even tone. "Uzumaki-san is _mine_. None of you shall lay a finger on him, now or ever." She narrowed her eyes as her Byakugan flipped on. Everyone stared at Hanabi like she was an alien, even Sakura, amid the wreckage of the food cart gawked in surprise at the young girl. Naruto was impressed that someone so young could be talented enough to land a blow like that.

This shouldn't have been a surprise, from what Naruto had heard, she was a prodigy, much like Itachi Uchiha and Neji were.

Speak of the devil, Neji had eventually managed to throw Mitsuki of balance and evade her attempt to body slam him again. He sprinted and and flipped over Hanabi in order to get a shot at Naruto, jets of chakra were shooting from his hands.

"Naruto! You may be my friend, but I will not let you stand unpunished for your corruption of Hanabi-sama!"

"Neji-san, no."

Hanabi jumped on Neji's back and seized his neck in a chokehold.

"H-Hanabi-sama! I must defend your honor as a woman of the –gurgle- H-Hyuga clan!"

Hanabi tightened her chokehold as she spoke, still in an expressionless tone. "I will not allow you to harm Uzumaki-san without my express permission." Neji tried to voice his concern, but his cousin was remarkably strong for her size, he started to panic as a black haze crept into his Byakugan's field of vision.

**'Seriously, thrall... at least make her one of your bodyguards. Oh, and keep those... 'condom' things, the snake female is here and you do _not _want cubs.**

**'**Anko-chan? How do y-'

Naruto's train of thought was interrupted when a very familiar pair of arms wrapped around his stomach. A long tongue ran up his right ear, and a sultry voice followed.

"_Naru-chaaaan. __I can't find my bra anywhere, do you wanna help me look for it?_"

Naruto turned around to address his favorite Jounin, she pressed her breasts into his upper stomach in response.

Anko took a look at the brawl in the street and smirked at Naruto. "Let's go before they notice that I borrowed you."

Naruto twitched a bit as he was poked by Anko's nipples. 'She's not wearing anything under that.'

The Kyuubi smirked and flicked his tails in amusement. **'Know what? I'm not taking over for you this time. I can't deny you the experience this go around, I've had my fun.'**

The brawl picked up again and Anko proceeded to drag Naruto out of sight; everyone except Hanabi failed to notice this so she let go of Neji and scuttled off after Naruto and Anko. Neji was about to give chase, but Tsunade's booming voice interrupted his train of thought.

The 5th Hokage was carrying a passed out Jiraiya on her shoulder as she managed to get out a coherent pair of sentences. "WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT FIGHTING IN THE STREET!?" –hic- The Hokage cracked her knuckles. "You all know I consider that as an invitation for me to join in, right?" Tsunade rolled up the sleeves of her kimono and stumbled toward the fearful teens.

Shizune came running out of the tower after her teacher and stood between her and the shaking ninja. "Tsunade-sama! You can't do this! Remember last time?!"

Tsunade narrowed her eyes and grabbed Shizune by the collar with her free hand. Everybody stared in awe as Tsunade drunkenly flung Shizune onto the nearest roof.

Tsunade stumbled through her next sentence. "This oaf ruined our anniversary and I need to beat _someone_ to a pulp. I prefer he be awake for it, so instead, I'm gonna show you what happens to shinobi who fight in my streets."

Shizune, who'd somehow landed on the roof feet first, jumped back down and tried to calm her teacher. "Tsunade-sama, remember, you've maxed out our insurance premiums for the month on employee injury claims and building damage!"

Tsunade was about to toss her former student farther away this time, but miraculously agreed not to cause any extreme collateral damage for the night. Shizune's hopes were dashed however, when her sensei pushed past her and addressed the scared and confused leaf ninja before her.

The Hokage paused and stilled herself so that she could speak without slurring. Her voice boomed throughout the street as the last of the civilian onlookers ran for cover. "ALRIGHT. –hic- INSTEAD OF BEATING ALL OF YOU INTO THE GROUND, I'VE DECIDED TO LET YOU ALL OFF WITH A WARNING. IF I CATCH YOU FIGHTING IN MY STREETS AGAIN, I'LL FORCE YOU **ALL** TO COMPETE IN A TOURNAMENT FOR THE RIGHT TO DATE NARUTO, EVEN YOU NEJI. AM I CLEAR?"

Neji, Sakura, Hinata, Ino, and Mitsuki all nodded and bowed in relief. "Hai! Hokage-sama!"

Shizune worriedly ushered the passed out Jiraya and her sensei home, hoping that nothing else would set her off. Tsunade-sama always got hysterical when it came to her teammate/ex/only friend, especially since he'd forgotten their anniversary. They'd _all _gotten off lucky when Tsunade backed down and went on her way, as the village economy wouldn't be able to handle a rampaging Tsunade.

Sakura brushed herself off and was the first to speak, she bowed in shame. "Sorry, I wasn't thinking, if I injured any of you, I can stitch it back up."

Hinata wasn't the first to speak, but she was the first to notice that something was really wrong. "Where's Naruto-kun? … Hanabi-chan is gone too." Hinata turned pale in fear and her Byakugan flipped on. She ran down the street faster than any of them had seen her move before, attempting in vain to pick Hanabi out from the crowd forming down the street.

"Hinata-sama, wait! It's almost curfew!" Neji sprinted after his cousin.

The three girls stood there in bewilderment. Mitsuki sighed as she watched the two Hyuga run down the street. "Well, there goes the fastest way to find Naruto."

Sakura sighed and hung her head. "I think we jumped the gun, Piggy-chan. There's something really wrong with Hinata's little sister." They both walked off in the same direction that Neji and Hinata went in hopes that they'd run into the Byakugan users.

Mitsuki smirked as she'd gotten rid of the biggest threats to Naruto. She wolf-whistled and 12 ninja appeared in front of her.

The butlers and maids all addressed her in unison. "_**Ma'am!**_"

Mitsuki brushed some dust off of her pants and smiled at her subordinates. "Alright, we have a missing head of the house. Fan out in groups of three and scour the village in quadrants. You're looking for the youngest of the Hyuga heiresses, and I thought I saw Anko Mitarashi at some point, so she's probably with Master Naruto. We need to find him before his friends do, they don't seem very happy with him at the moment and _may _attempt to injure him."

The ninja nodded and scattered off in all directions, Mitsuki found a tree and sat underneath it. "Now` it's time to play the waiting game."

"Or you could stay and chat."

Mitsuki looked up and saw Kakashi sitting on a branch with a purple-haired woman, Yugao Uzuki. Mitsuki put her hands behind her head as she smirked up at her former captain and teammate, "So Yugao-senpai is the lucky lady you turned me down for Kakashi-taichou?".

Kakashi put up his hand and shook his head. "Nah, it was more the fact that you were still a kid at the time."

Mitsuki looked at Kakashi and Yugao in confusion. "Were you guys watching the whole time?

The two Jounin nodded simultaneously, Yugao replied for her date. "I wanted to go to the movies, but instead he makes me put on ninja gear and says that we're following Naruto Uzumaki around for the night."

Kakashi nudged her and joked. "Much better than the movies, right? We get a better show for free."

Yugao smiled slightly and fluffed her hair. "Touché, Kashi-chan. I thought you'd gone insane, but following Naruto around has been a show in itself."

Kakashi peered down at his former subordinate. "Ne, Mitsuki-chan? What do _you _plan to do about your competition for Naruto?"

Mitsuki's tan visage somehow turned a light shade of pink. "Kakashi-taichou!"

Kakashi was obviously smirking beneath his mask as he watched Mitsuki squirm at the question.

Mitsuki pouted and looked away from from her former captain. "I have a job to do, I can't let any outside emotions affect that."

"Oh really?" Kakashi leaned back and hung by his knees from the branch, he crossed his arms and stared down at Mitsuki with a raised eyebrow, Yugao looked on in amusement.

Kakashi, even though only one of his eyes was visible, was somehow drilling holes in Mitsuki's face with his skeptical eye. She just stared, and eventually, she caved under Kakashi's stare. "Fine. I… just don't want to get in the way of his happiness. I've felt for him since the first day he arrived at the estate, I've never met someone so… different. I know that I have the most access to him, but what if he'd be happier with someone else? I could never forgive myself if we're not truly meant to be together. I'd be breaking the very first clause of the oath my family took, to ensure his prosperity."

Yugao mirrored Kakashi and hung on the branch by her knees. With crossed arms, Yugao affirmed what her former captain had just said, but with more than just two words. "Think about it this way Mitsuki-chan, you can do your duty even better when your right there with him, experiencing life as his soul mate. From what I see, you'd be great for him. Naruto's emotions aren't as fickle as everyone else's, he won't change his mind about you at the drop of a hat or anything."

Just then, the twelve butlers and maids appeared in front of their conversation. An older man with an eye patch stepped forward. "Tachibana-sama. We've located master Uzumaki."

Kakashi, still dangling above like a cave bat, poked his subordinate on the top of her head. "Go get your man Mitsuki-chan."

Mitsuki stood up and smiled at Kakashi and Yugao. "I never thought about it that way, you two are right. Is it deplorable? Maybe... but if it makes him happiest, I'll have done my duty properly." Mitsuki then turned to the man with the eye patch. "Kenji-san, give me his location and you all can go home for the night, I'll go make sure he isn't attacked." Kenji handed Mitsuki a map and she nodded at her charges, without a word, she dematerialized into a swirl of leaves. The ninja butlers and maids scattered off in the same general direction following Mitsuki's departure.

Kakashi and Yugao jumped from the branch and landed on the ground, there was a pause, and Kakashi, as usual, was rather blunt in his way of speech.

"Sex?"

Yugao looked at him and rolled her eyes. "How about we go eat first! You're wearing me out with all this energy you have."

* * *

Anko was intently watching Naruto stuff his face full of the dango and noodles she'd bought for the two of them. Anko, deciding to be serious for a moment, decided to make some progress with the young man.

"Ne, Naru-chan?"

Naruto looked up and smiled, waiting for her to continue.

"I said that I was serious about you, so it's time to follow up on that. I know we have an age gap to worry about, but honestly, I don't see it as much of a problem."

Naruto shrugged. "I'm almost 16, you can't be that much older than I am right? It's nothing to worry about really. I'm just playing by ear at this point."

Anko nodded. "I get that, I've seen the competition for you, I've got my work cut out for me it seems, but nevertheless, I want to be something to you. Naru-chan, be honest, you have all these young vixens chasing after you, and I'm almost 27, do I have a shot?"

Naruto gave the older woman a reassuring smile. "Relax, I haven't committed to anyone yet, mainly because I think all of you deserve a fair shot. Everyone seems like they really like me now."

Anko wiped some noodle broth off of Naruto's face. "I noticed. So why're you still putting on the innocent act? I thought I _taught _you about how people value your company."

Naruto scratched his head. "I need to stay off the radar like that, right now, everyone wants to date me, if they knew you'd gotten to me first, things may not go well for you. The last thing I need is my fan club in a mad dash to catch a ride on the Naruto Express."

Anko smirked. "Is there still room for Anko-sensei on this Naruto Express?" She punctuated her question with a gentle rub of Naruto's crotch with her bare foot. Naruto shivered at the softness of her feet, his pants began to feel a little tight.

Naruto nodded silently as he tried to keep his cool in the crowded restaurant. "Anko-chan, why this place, won't they find us eventually? They have three Hyugas with them, and I show up like fireworks in their field of vision.

Anko gestured around the room. Naruto noticed some seals on the walls in various places. "This place was made to get away from the ninja world when you need a break. If you don't want to be found, come here."

Naruto narrowed his eyes in skepticism. "Nani? How's this place stay a secret?"

"Only the ANBU know about it, and they're not a very open bunch of people. I was able to get the location off Kakashi when he uh... Let's just say he ruined my bed and he owed me a favor... Speaking of beds, don't eat too much, I'm gonna _**wreck**_ you tonight and I don't want you throwing up and ruining my sheets_." _Anko punctuated her declaration by squeezing Naruto's appendage between her toes, he tensed and made an interesting sound, drawing attention to himself and Anko.

Naruto pleadingly looked at Anko and shook his head. "I'll keep it down, I promise. I learned about doing stuff on an empty stomach the hard way." Anko was about to reply, but they simultaneously started looking around the restaurant in suspicion, something felt off. There was a tingle running up Naruto's spine, much like the one Anko used to give him. Naruto could tell he was being watched, and Anko could feel a decent amount of killing intent directed at her.

Naruto just shrugged the feeling off. 'Meh, the last person to give me that feeling was Anko-chan, maybe something good will come of it.'

'**Yeah, right. If you and the Uchiha prick don't kill each other, it's likely one of these females will be your downfall.'**

'I thought you'd be happier for me or sumthin'.'

'**Females are vengeful entities, don't have **_**too **_**much fun... Hell, I can smell the little one now.'**

'Hanabi?... Noted.'

Naruto returned his attention to Anko, who was suspiciously picking at her food as her eyes darted around the room. It was then that Naruto gave her the magic words. "I'm ready to go now."

Anko grinned and called for the check, she then gave Naruto a knowing look. "_I hope you brought a few bandages with you_."

It was then that Kakashi and Yugao walked into the hidden restaurant. Kakashi's eye immediately zeroed in on Naruto and Anko's booth. Yugao, who was conversing with him noticed that his attention had gone elsewhere, she too, turned her head and spotted Naruto and Anko. Yugao gave Anko a suspicious smirk, "Robbing the cradle never really seemed like it was your thing.".

Anko rolled her eyes and flipped Yugao off. "Don't act like you wouldn't."

Yugao looked Naruto up and down. "Yeah, he's filled out nicely, but I have this guy, someone you _haven't gotten to yet_." She put Kakashi in a headlock and ruffled his hair.

Anko immediately started to laugh. "I'm not ANBU! How do you think I got this place's location?" Anko gestured her head toward Kakashi, who said nothing in reply.

Yugao let Kakashi out of the headlock and glared at him. "Kashi-chan?"

Kakashi stood up and shrugged. "I have a weakness for purple hair, we got a little drunk a few years ago and had a crazy night. I owed her a bed so I gave her this place's location instead."

Yugao glared at Anko, who smirked back. "**Not** a word."

Anko flipped her hair and pulled Naruto up by the wrist. "I think that's our cue to leave."

Kakashi eye smiled at Naruto. "Don't forget to use those condoms."

Naruto looked back at him in confusion. "Wait what? How do you-" Anko cut Naruto off when she snatched him out the door.

Yugao angrily grabbed Kakashi by the ear.

"You ought to worry about yourself! You know how I feel about Anko, why didn't you bring that up?!"

Kakashi gave her a lazy stare. "Well, you didn't ask."

"Touché."

* * *

Mitsuki had been waiting in a tree overlooking the door to the restaurant. She stopped playing with the squirrel that lived there when she saw Anko drag Naruto out the door.

'Damn, he's with _her.' _Mitsuki was well aware of Naruto's adventure with Anko, and even though she was morally obligated to watch and make sure nothing dangerous happened… she'd decided against following Naruto into the forest that night. Now, she'd _have _to at least make sure none of his friends found him.

Mitsuki followed them all the way to Anko's apartment, it was a nice high rise with… big windows. Mitsuki wasn't thrilled about that part, she might accidentally catch a glimpse of what they were doing that night. Mitsuki was jealous enough, but this was quite a lot to stomach, and it felt… beneath her. Never the less, an oath was an oath, she had to make sure Naruto didn't get attacked.

Simply put, it was a long and painful night for Mitsuki. She sat there in silence as she listened to the noise. Between the screaming, moaning, and grunting, it was hard to tell if they were fighting or fucking. By the time it was morning, Mitsuki had angrily pulverized nearly a quarter of the branches in the apartment complex's tree.

* * *

***UPDATE* MY STORY HAS BECOME POPULAR ENOUGH TO CATCH THE ATTENTION OF THE MA CONTENT HIT SQUAD. THERE ARE TO BE NO MORE EXPLICIT SEX SCENES UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE, BUT THERE WILL BE OVERALL KINKINESS, (I'M REALLY GONNA PUSH MY M RATING) SO DON'T WORRY TOO MUCH. MY APOLOGIES, AND I HOPE YOU'VE ALREADY READ WHAT HAD BEEN POSTED. THANKS FOR STICKING WITH ME SO FAR.**

***UDATE2* Look out for a version of this encounter on the adultfanfiction story page, my pen name there is Breath_of_the_Wiz. The Orange Flash: Lost Chapters is the title, and there, you can read chapter 11 uncut. Anyway, thanks for reading!**

* * *

When Naruto left, he did a double take at the pile of saw dust beneath the tree he'd passed the night before. He payed it no mind however, as he had some important business to attend to that day. Mitsuki slipped into Anko's house as Naruto was walking out, timing it perfectly so that she never entered his field of vision while he opened and shut the door.

Anko, still twitching and convulsing from her morning quickie with Naruto, shut the door and went to throw away the empty ramen cups she'd bought in case Naruto stayed the night. Anko stopped as soon as she dropped the cups into the trash. She gave Mitsuki a gluttonous smile. "-hngh!- W-What's up, need something Mitsu- *oh god!* Mitsuki?"

Mitsuki rolled her eyes at Anko, who wouldn't stop fidgeting and moaning. "I just came to tell you, all bets are off. I'm retracting the promise I made to you concerning my possible involvement with Naruto."

Anko gave an absent minded smile as she tried to stop giggling and twitching. "Ah well. I guess you're a threat again, having him to myself was –hahn!- fun while it lasted. Hey-hey, Mitsuki? If he chooses you in the end, can I at least have him one night a week? Mmmm, just one?"

Mitsuki flipped her hair and her eyes flared up enough to light the room somewhat.

"Don't bet on it. If you want him, you'd better make sure he chooses you. If you want to have the opportunity to... fornicate, get him while you can."

Anko sat down at her kitchen table and tried to get through her sentence without moaning. "I guess I'll just have to fuck him better than -ahn!- you do." Anko showed Mitsuki the box of vibrating condoms. "You gotta -hmmmnnn- You gotta try these... they're _incredible." _Anko started to giggle as she became giddy from the mere thought of the night before.

-mmmm- "Naru-chan broke my bed in _half _last night, can you -_oooh god_\- tell him to replace it for me?"_  
_

Mitsuki started to chuckle at Anko's almost infantile lack of concern. "Anko-san, I don't need to take my clothes off to convince Uzumaki-sama of anything_. _You'd better rethink your game-plan before he starts seeing you as his personal plaything." Mitsuki winked and disappeared in a swirl of leaves.

Anko would have been worried, but she felt too good, maybe the revelation would hit her later. For now, she was more concerned with how awesome her crotch was feeling at the moment.

"I should be –hugh!- w-worried, but damn, I feel **_good_**."

Anko may have felt great, but a big pair of lavender eyes were staring daggers at her from an unspecified location outside the apartment.

"Those condoms were for Uzumaki-san and _I." _

* * *

Don't forget to review, I actually read all of them, and constructive criticism is greatly appreciated. Also, 10LawnGnomes, I'll actually consider a Naru/Haku fic sometime in the future. Kishimoto missed a great opportunity with that character.

AN: I've put some thought into it, and this will be my main project while I have some side projects going on too. So that you guys have something to read between my updates of Orange Flash, I've decided to start work on a Guilty Crown fic. It's a pretty good show, and I think that it would have been a lot better overall if they'd made Shu a more forceful person. Anyway, as some of you may know, FemGaara won the poll with 27 votes to Temari's 24. I'd loved to have put Yugito in, but this Harem's starting to get difficult to write. I can only handle one more standing member before this fic's quality begins to suffer. If it's any consolation, Temari will be a joke member, like Hanabi. I'm not taking either of them seriously for quality purposes, anyways, see you all next time.

~Breath of the Wiz

_Signin' Off_


	19. Chapter 19: Wait For Me

AN: Hello again. This chapter, I'm planning on getting some plot related events out of the way, also, I'm preparing the stage for my rendition of "Gaara-chan". I'm still unsure if I want to bring her in sooner and use some of the omake from chapter 17, or if I'll wait for the Suna arc to begin and then bring her into naruto's circle. I'm leaning toward waiting right now because a lot of Harem stories I've seen tend to run out of steam around the 15 chapter mark, they're either discontinued, or become rather boring. I'll do my best to keep things fresh. Let's get this ball rolling.

* * *

After his late night (and early morning) with Anko, Naruto had an uncharacteristic smirk on his face. Though it was early, many people were out and about, starting their day. Today was the day, the day that he would tattoo the Hiraishin seals to his palms. Sure, he didn't have an appointment, but the place couldn't be that crowded this early in the morning. As Naruto practically bounced down the streets, he grinded to a halt as he nearly ran over someone and caught her by the upper arms, as to keep her from slamming into the ground.

Naruto was in his own world up until then, so he didn't notice the bubblegum pink hair for a split second, however impossible that sounds. Naruto effortlessly picked her up and plopped her on her feet. Sakura. She had obviously been grocery shopping, judging from the large bag in her hands.

The Haruno girl was the same color as her hair by the time she realized who she ran into.

'Oh no. Why now?'

'_**SHANARROOO! JACKPOT!'**_

'_Quiet you.'_

Sakura was the first to speak, she had a few things she needed to say to her teammate. "Hey Naruto-kun… I owe you an apology, you know, for attacking you last night. I jumped to a conclusion before I heard your side of the story."

Naruto smiled. "It's fine. Truth be told, I kinda miss the occasional beat down from you!"

Sakura's stomach churned a bit at the mere thought of the amount of physical abuse Naruto had suffered at her hands during their genin days.

"Oh, hey Naruto-kun? You left this at my house last night, I was going to give it to you yesterday, but… well, things got out of hand."

She reached into her wallet and pulled out a green crystal necklace, Naruto took it from her nonchalantly.

Sakura cocked her head to the side. "I'd figured you'd be more excited to get it back."

Naruto chuckled answered her as he put the necklace on. "I actually was going to stop by your house today so I could pick it up. You get _really, really _grabby when you faint, so I gave you something to grab that _wasn't_ part of my body while I took you home."

Sakura turned bright red and dropped her groceries. Her hands went up to her face in embarrassment. "Oh no... Naruto! I'm **_so _sorry**!" Sakura squealed as she tried not to implode on herself. "Did I hurt you?! Oh god. Please tell me I didn't do anything inappropriate while I was out!"

Naruto grinned and put his hands up. "Relax, it was nothing I couldn't deal with… but… be careful next time, you're extremely strong. –Heh!- You almost crushed my-"

Sakura squeaked and put her hands forward, signaling Naruto to stop talking. "NO! Please don't say anything else, I can happily go to the grave without knowing the details!"

Naruto grinned in amusement. "I was gonna say neck."

Sakura simmered down somewhat. "Oh. Really?"

In simple terms, Naruto, had a penchant for foolery, so he wasn't going to let Sakura off with a lie. "Hah! No."

Sakura bounced up and down in a medley of frustration and mortification. "Oooooh! Naruto!"

He bent down and picked up her bag, which had miraculously not spilled anything. "Meat huh. I thought you went vegan like everyone else when you heard Sasuke-teme liked thin girls."

Sakura's face twitched a bit as she took the bag. _'I still am vegan. This stuff's for him the next time he stops by… Maybe I can get him to visit me more often if I offer…'_

Without thinking, Sakura took the opportunity and made her offer. "I still am, I like to cook all sorts of things though, e-even food I don't actually eat. If you come over tomorrow, I'll give you some se- ... steak… I'll give you steak."

Sakura slammed her mouth shut before she could ponder whether or not it was a good idea to do what she just did.

' _Where'd that come from?! … WHY AM I STILL TALKING TO HIM?! THIS IS BAAAAD!'_

Inner Sakura started to dance with joy and do flips everywhere. _**'AWESOME! NICE GOING FOREHEAD!'**_

Three feet away, another mind was also mulling over what just happened. _'Hey, asshole, you're good at reading people right? What was she gonna say?'_

'_**Freudian slip. The pink one wants to mate with you but her conscious mind keeps overriding her subconscious desires. Knowing you, you're gonna wait this one out since you're so opposed to just taking a female and making her yours without question.'**_

'_She… she what? … And who the hell is Freud?'_

'_**Try reading a book for once, fool… -sigh- That's just my guess, I could be wrong though, females are generally insane.'**_

'_How can Sakura-chan like me? She loves Sasuke! I thought she was just nervous because she wasn't used to me being around anymore! Geez, I can't read her at all.'_

'_**All the other females want to mate with you, what makes this one any different?'**_

'… _Well I…'_

Sakura started to turn red like her tank top as the pause became increasingly long. Naruto seemed to be deep in thought as a look of sheer surprise started to roll across his face. Sakura began to think it was due to her verbal slip just seconds earlier and became more nervous as she awaited Naruto's reply.

Naruto started to feel his stomach flutter, it was now or never and he became deadly serious as he grabbed Sakura by the shoulders. This scared Sakura half to death, what she wasn't prepared for was what Naruto was about to ask her?

"_Sakura-chan, **please**, be completely honest. How do you feel about me?_"

Sakura went doe-eyed as her pupils dilated in fear, covering her green pupils in black. She managed to keep her consciousness, but not her composure.

'_No! No! DO NOT FAINT AGAIN!' _

Sakura let off a sequence of unintelligible sounds, and then exploded into a shower of nervous energy. "I-… I DON'T KNOW OKAY! I DON'T FUCKING KNOW! IT'S COMPLICATED NARUTO!"

Sakura summarily sprinted off and jumped out of view. Naruto could feel his heart begin to shatter and his head started to droop, but his tenant's booming voice abruptly cut off the boy's descent.

'_**She didn't say no you pussy. If you go all wangsty on me, I swear, I'll cut the blood circulation to your penis. Let the female sort out her insanity on her own.'**_

'_What if she just couldn't find a way to spare my feelings?'_

'_**Stop it. She wants you... It's not even worth thinking about, kit! Now go find the tattoo parlor!'**_

'_Right! Tattoos.'_

* * *

The Kazekage had just gotten out of a meeting with her village council, and was walking back to the tower with her brother and sister. It was safe to say that Gaara was completely thrown off balance by her whole situation.

She'd been forced to discuss a political marriage with her council, and was repeatedly silenced by her power hungry moron of a regent. She'd have to put up with him at least until she was 18 though, so no point fussing over it now.

They'd at first decided to marry her off to a middle aged man in the Konoha council, but a bit of coaxing, or in this case, loud swearing from Kankuro gave her the chance to speak her opinion. Gaara was in it now though, she'd said the first name that came to her when they asked if she had any viable suitors in mind for a political marriage, and she was unsure of the consequences of making such a choice.

Kankuro was the first to speak after the long silence. "So, Naruto Uzumaki huh? I haven't seen the guy in a while, but… if anyone's gonna treat you right, it'd be him."

Gaara fiddled with her crimson side-tail and untied it, letting her long crimson hair flow free. "Nothing's set in stone yet Kankuro. Naruto probably won't be very receptive toward a political marriage."

Temari, gingerly filing her nails, chimed in as well. "Again, I have no idea who you guys are talking about."

Kankuro, who was more than a head taller than Gaara, peered over her head and raised his eyebrow. "Really Temari? He was pretty hard to miss in the chuunin exams, BRIGHT _ORANGE_ jumpsuit? He knocked that Neji kid out, remember?"

Gaara turned to Temari with a blank expression. "He's Konoha's jinchuuriki, a fact he made quite clear during his battle with Neji Hyuuga and myself."

Kankuro looked down at his rather short sister. "How exactly do you know that?"

Gaara's eyes swiveled to her older brother. "I know what I saw."

Temari flicked a ladybug off her kimono. "Oh! So 'Orange Boy' is Naruto. I just didn't have a name to go with the face, that's all… So, Gaara-chan, why exactly was he the first person to come to mind for you?"

Gaara turned to her sister and gave her a strange look; Temari recoiled a bit, as she still had trouble adjusting to her sister's notable lack of bloodlust since the Chuunin Exams.

Temari caught on immediately. "Why am I even asking? If someone could turn you around like this, it's pretty obvious as to why… but then again, how long's it been since you've seen him?"

Gaara counted on her fingers. "Two years, eight months, six days, thirteen hours, twenty seven minutes, and… fourty three seconds, since we've seen each other."

Gaara's siblings paid no mind to her disturbing accuracy, mainly because she was the kind of person that always knew the exact date and time of day, probably due to years of insomnia. That, and her quiet obsession with Naruto had slowly become visible over the past two years, time and again, she'd be caught absentmindedly staring out the window of her office, writing his name all over her reports, or her sand would spontaneously spell out his name while she was sleeping.

Ah yes, sleep, something that came easy for Gaara after having her seal improved, it had almost become a hobby of hers. Her regents and assistants had to be vigilant in their efforts to keep her awake during the less physically oriented tasks assigned to the Kazekage. That aside, Temari and Kankuro couldn't normally tell when Gaara was excited, but this was rather odd of her.

After the short and awkward silence brought on by Gaara's clock-like time keeping, Kankuro questioned Gaara once more.

"How're you so sure that they'll go through with your proposal? Isn't Naruto just another Ninja in Konoha?"

The dust on the street started to whirl around her, something that happened when she got emotional or excited, there was of course no change in her facial expression.

"He told me once, that true strength comes from the desire to protect others. That's why he wanted to become Hokage. He taught me that the people I care about are what validate my existence, not some kill count. Without them, I'm alone, and if I spend my life alone, they can just as easily say I never existed to begin with. He _**will **_be Hokage one day, I know it… That's why he was the first to come to my mind, he's the only one the council would accept."

Temari had made it her business to help increase Gaara's emotional capacity over the years, and as such, she would drill her sister with a few important questions now and then.

"Gaara-chan? Is that the _**only**_ reason? My gut tells me there's more to it than that. You've been thinking about him an awful lot lately."

Gaara bashfully fiddled with a tassel on her sash belt, her face hadn't changed, but her body language obviously gave off an air of mild discomfort.

"He's… the most logical choice for such a proposition."

Kankuro anxiously scratched his head and ushered his baby sister into the tower. "Okay, Gaara. You're getting all excitable again, and when that happens, sand gets in places I didn't know I had."

Temari covered her hair with her hands. "Gaara-chan. I just took a shower before the meeting, please, simmer down, okay?

Gaara looked behind her sister and cocked her head to the side in surprise. Small dust devils were following them to the door. Gaara gave a smooth yet bashful "My apologies everyone!" and stretched her hand out. All of the sand in the street instantly went still, and every single grain of sand on her brother and sister floated out the door into the streets. The staring pedestrians paid it no mind however, spontaneous dust storms tended to happen around the Kazekage, they just made sure to shower only just before going to sleep, as to avoid becoming dirty again before the day was over.

Temari checked her war fan's hinge for sand. "I just want you to be sure of yourself, you can always call these sorts of things off. That's why I asked."

"Naruto will be the next Hokage. If our villages are connected in such a way, my ability to protect my people will be twofold."

Temari smiled a bit and grabbed the bridge of her nose. Temari and Gaara made their way up to the Kazekage's office and Gaara immediately pulled out some paper. She needed to contact Tsunade and explain things to her so that she wouldn't be surprised.

"_Dear Tsunade-sama,_

_In the following days, it may come to your attention that a lucrative and mutually beneficial agreement is achievable between our villages. However, you may object to its' conditions. As such, I'd prefer to discuss it with you in person once I have all of the details. Just as a warning, it will likely involve Naruto._

_~Godaime Kazekage"_

Gaara inscribed her signature in sand and folded the letter into a small cylinder and whistled. A ninja came in through the window.

"Make sure the Hokage gets this letter. I want the reply brought directly to me."

"Yes ma'am." The ninja took the wooden cylinder and disappeared, Gaara was about to take a well deserved nap on her desk until Temari placed a thick stack of papers in front of her.

"These are the various ninja-related issues we have right now. The regent wants you to sign off on them, _**and **_they said they'll fine me if they catch me forging any more of your signatures, so you're gonna have to actually do your paperwork for once."

Gaara lifted her head up and wearily stared at the stack of papers.

"Temari, do they all sign across the bottom-left, like this top sheet?"

"Yeah. You should be able to blaze through this stack pretty quickly. Here's a-"

Gaara looked around her desk and spied a letter opener, she picked it up and stared at the blade. Temari became confused. "Gaara? What're you doing?"

Without answering, Gaara slammed the blade through the stack of paper, right above the dotted line. She popped the opener out of the table and through the cleanly made hole.

"Signed."

Gaara handed the stack to her big sister and walked over to her favorite spot in the room to sleep, her gourd broke down into a pile of sand and she plopped down on it, back first. Within seconds, the Kazekage was asleep, and a bewildered Temari called out to her sister.

"Gaara, what if they don't accept this?"

The Kazekage's eyes fluttered open in mild annoyance. "Tell them not to bother me unless they need something killed... Or if something important is on fire." She flicked her wrist at her sister and some sand gathered beneath her feet. Temari was floated out the door, looking rather exasperated. Once again, Gaara fell into a dreamless sleep.

'I wonder how Naruto's doing.'

* * *

"I'm sending you two to Sunagakure."

Sasuke and Kabuto stared blankly at Orochimaru, questions bouncing through their thoughts. Kabuto was the first to voice his concerns, "Will we be able to move openly or not? I have a feeling that they'll be a bit more weary of our ninja following the Chuunin Exams."

"I'd prefer you stay undetected. I have a platoon of agents imbedded there, and from what they've gathered, Akatsuki will be making a move soon. They've spotted Zetsu on the outskirts of the desert a handful of times, you two should be enough to turn them back should they make a move on the Shukaku."

After replying, Orochimaru looked up from his work and paused. Adjusting his white and purple kage garb, he spun his chair and looked out the window at the city below. Otogakure was a sprawling, well-lit location, especially since it was located in a cavern deep in sound counry's mountains. They only got natural lighting through a huge grated sky-light, so Orochimaru's office was illuminated via fluorescent lighting.

Sasuke cocked his head to the side and scratched the back of his neck. "Wouldn't this be more effective as a joint operation with Sunagakure?"

Orochimaru's back was to them while he shook his head, staring down at his village, they could hear the excitement in his voice. "I'd like you to bring me the body of either Deidara or Sasori." He smirked and licked his lips. "I'd like to see just _what_ they've done to themselves, that, and the Edo Tensei needs some new… inspiration. Kukukukuku… belay that, bring me _**both**_ of them if you can manage it."

Kabuto bowed and left so that he could prepare a bag. "Hai! Orochimaru-sama!"

Sasuke remained however, and flicked some lint off his shoulder as he stood expectantly; right on cue Orochimaru gave his apprentice some incentive.

"Oh that's right, Sasuke, if you bring me one or both of their bodies, I'll allow you to sign the Snake Contract."

Sasuke nodded in agreement and silently left the room, he followed Kabuto to the living quarters within the Otokage's Tower, and they began gathering supplies.

"Sasuke-san, I have good news."

"Yeah?"

"Orochimaru-sama has heeded the soldiers' complaints and requisitioned some flavored food pills for our consumption."

Sasuke perked up slightly at that bit of information. "What's so difficult about actual food? … Whatever, what flavors did he give us?"

After opening the boxes, Kabuto's smile unceremoniously shattered into a look of raw, unadulterated, disappointment.

"… Rice flavor."

"Fuck."

(AN: Yup, I'm making Otogakure an actual ninja village, I never understood why it wasn't one to begin with. I got all excited to see it, and then it turned out to be a series of labs and hideouts… lame.)

* * *

Naruto grunted while he miserably tried to eat his ramen, his palms were still raw, raw enough to bleed through the bandages somewhat. Teuchi stared at him, miserably fumbling with his chopsticks.

"Hey Naruto? You sure you're okay?"

Naruto smiled, but winced when the sticks rubbed against a tender spot. "I'm fine Ojisan. I just got some new tattoos on my hands, that's all!"

Teuchi scratched his head. "Why would ya do that?"

Naruto puffed his chest out and beamed. "It's for a jutsu I'm working on!"

Teuchi began to de-feather a chicken while he pried further. "What kind of jutsu?"

"Oh, just the Hiraishin, with a personal spin on it."

"… That rings a bell… The Yondaime had a technique called the Hiraishin didn't he?"

Naruto nodded. "It's a teleportation technique, the fastest one around too!"

Teuchi grinned. "That's great Naruto! I'd like to see it in action one day… You sure you don't want a fork for that?"

Naruto gave Teuchi an intrigued look. "What's a… fork?"

Teuchi paused, and then shrugged. "Not sure how to explain it, they use them in Tetsu No Kuni for their tougher cuisine, and they don't require as much coordination as chopsticks. Should be less painful for you to use."

Teuchi handed Naruto the strange metal utensil and the jinchuuriki stared at it with extreme curiosity. "Weird, but I can see how it'd be easier to eat noodles with the teeth on this thing." Naruto stuck the fork in his ramen and twisted the noodles into a ball and stuffed them in his mouth. "Wow, I can eat ramen even _**faster**_ with this 'fork' thing!"

"Glad you like it, that bowl's on the house. I gotta go put out an ad for some kitchen assistants, so I'll see you later."

Just as Teuchi went into the back of the stand, Ino poked her head through the curtain and gave Naruto a pleading look.

"Hey, Naruto?"

Naruto mumbled an answer, but it was unintelligible, mainly because his mouth full of noodles

"Mhmmm?"

"I wanna apologize for attacking you last night."

Naruto swallowed his noodles and smiled. "It's fine, Hanabi-chan just has a little crush on me, that's all. She'll grow out of it!"

Ino looked off to the side and smirked, muttering a soft "Sure. _Of course she will._"

Naruto cocked his head to the side. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing important."

Ino sat on the stool closest to Naruto and took his hands, worriedly staring at them, she questioned him. "Did you go all Rock Lee on a training log or something? You should be more careful with your hands."

Ino's hands glowed green, and Naruto could feel the throbbing pain subside. "You're a medic-nin too?"

Ino shook her head. "Nah, I just know basic stuff. I'm all about Taijutsu and Ninjutsu now… What did you do to your hands exactly?"

Naruto unwrapped the bloody and inky bandages, showing Ino what he'd been up to for the past few hours. A seal of some sort had been etched into his palm, and there were a series of small kanji running from the seal to the tips of his fingers.

"What's this for?"

Naruto silently put the bowl of ramen in his left hand, there was a flash of orange light, and the bowl had instantly moved to his right hand. Naruto grinned, "I learned my Dad's signature technique, Hiraishin."

Ino's eyes widened, she'd almost forgotten about the time she'd visited Naruto and learned the truth of his lineage. She began to feel sorry for him, having been kept in the dark and so alone for such a long time.

"Hey, there's something I've been meaning to tell you, Naruto-kun."

"What is it?"

"When Kakashi brought you back from that mission where Sasuke was 'kidnapped' by Orochimaru… I visited you in the hospital."

"Oh I never knew… Thanks Ino-chan."

"That's not all, I couldn't imagine Sasuke being kidnapped at the time, so I took a peek at your short term memory while you were sleeping. I saw everything, what you went through to save someone who didn't want to be saved. I know he tried to kill you, Naruto, I know how you really feel about all of this… It just tears me up inside to see you put on that fake smile for Sakura."

"Aw Ino! I'm fine! Don't worr-"

Naruto could see Ino tearing up a little.

"I know a fake smile when I see one Naruto, you can't fool me, especially not now. I've been keeping an eye on you since the chuunin exams, when you beat Neji, you proved that there was more to you than everyone else thought… You've always said that you wanted to be Hokage, and up until then, I didn't think you were cut out for it. Nobody will think any less of you if you give up on this whole Sasuke mess, you've gotta respect yourself more than this, right? You're the son of the 4th Hokage."

Naruto squeezed Ino's hands back as he stared at the wooden floor. "I understand your concern, but I made the promise of a lifetime to Sakura. A man's only as good as his word, but more importantly, I want Sakura to smile like she used to when Sasuke was around, she's just not the same anymore, that's why I have to do this. So what, it sucks, but to see her smile like she used to… I'd do anything."

"You must really love her, don't you?"

"Yeah, I guess I d-"

Naruto was cut off when he looked up, tears were streaming down Ino's face, even though she was smiling.

Ino sniffled. "I… I'd kill for someone to love me like that. It's not fair! Why her Naruto? I actually care about your wellbeing! What if you get yourself killed over something like this?!"

Naruto, taken aback by Ino's sincerity pulled her in, to the point at which their foreheads were touching. Turquoise eyes met royal blue ones, and for a moment, time stood still. Ino's whimpering faded as she hung onto his every word.

Naruto kissed Ino on the forehead and wiped the tears from her eyes. "Will you wait for me, Ino-chan?"

Even more tears welled up in Ino's eyes as she wrapped Naruto up in a bear hug. This time, they were tears of joy, as Naruto had told her, in so many words, just what she needed to hear. "No. –sniff-… I'm gonna chase you down and make you mine, Naruto-kun."

Naruto smiled at her. "I'm lookin' forward to it, Ino-chan."

* * *

AN: Everyone else had better hurry up, Ino's already on date number 2! Next chapter, Naruto's date with Hinata, and Gaara will be paying Tsunade a visit. Also, everyone pray for Sasuke, maybe Orochimaru will start requisitioning real food, maybe not though, he's pretty sadistic.

I'm going on vacation now too, so my updates will be much more frequent than they have been. Sorry about the long abscence, but finals are a bitch.

Thanks for reading, your reviews and favorites are greatly appreciated.

_~Breath of the Wiz_

_Signin' Off_


	20. Chapter 20: The Desert Flower

AN: I was at first going to wait to reintroduce Gaara to Naruto, but I have some entertaining ideas, so I wanted to get their reunion out of the way ASAP. This'll be one of my longer chapters, so kick back and grab something to munch on… Other than that, I don't really know what to say about this one. Have fun reading.

* * *

As Ino strutted away from the ramen stand, she felt some slight remorse at her outburst, but was overall satisfied with Naruto's reaction to her confession. In an unofficial sense, she'd just successfully pulled off date number 2, however, she'd have preferred to keep the cards in her hand, because now, the fate of their relationship would be left up to Naruto.

Ino was rather unsure of herself, competing with Sakura for Naruto's heart would be a difficult endeavor to say the least. The guy was head over heels for her best friend, and from what he'd said; his love for Sakura was equal to, if not, greater than her own affections toward _him. _

Now, all she needed to do was plan her course of action for their third date, however, she needed some more information concerning Naruto's personality so that she could better predict what he would say on this final date of theirs.

"Guess it's off to the drawing board."

"_Sure you're not overthinking it?"_

Ino twitched and swung around at the sudden remark.

"Huh?! Oh... Hey Asuma-sensei."

* * *

Naruto chuckled to himself as he walked home. Staring up at the sky, he mused "Sometimes I wonder. Of all people, why me? Every one of them has something incredible to offer. Ino… she's really taken a shine to me. Sakura's even started to… heh."

'**You should consider yourself lucky. This isn't commonplace for most humans, having such a selection of mates. As much as it pains me to say it, you're quite the Alpha-Male… In a strange, moronic sort of way.'**

'_Thanks... I guess. Coming from you, that means a lot.'_

The instant Naruto got through the door, he made his way toward his room. Walking past the doors to the kitchen, he spotted his bodyguard, who was absentmindedly directing the kitchen staff through their routine.

"Mitsuki-chan."

She turned her head and gave Naruto a weak smile, she walked out of the kitchen and shut the doors. "Yes Namikaze-sama?"

"You seem tired. Go ahead and take the day off, you know, as thanks for saving my hide last night."

Mitsuki exhaled in relief and bowed. "Thank you Namikaze-sama, I'll be in my room."

Naruto scratched his nose in curiosity. "You have a room here? I thought you lived somewhere else."

"It's one floor above yours, next to the observatory… I'd actually recommend going up there when you have time tonight, I hear the stars are supposed to be especially bright."

Naruto scratched his head in confusion. "Your room or the observatory?"

Mitsuki took the opportunity to bait Naruto, _just_ enough to pique his interest. "That decision is _yours_ to make, Namikaze-sama. I'll be turning in for the day."

Naruto stared at Mistuki as she walked up the stairs, she had an unusual bounce in her step for someone so tired.

"Hey Mitsuki-chan."

"Yes?"

"Sorry to be a nag, but I have a date with Hinata Hyuga tomorrow and-"

Mitsuki smiled at her charge and reassured him. "The Hyuga Heiress? …_Come see me later tonight and I'll get you sorted out_. She _is_ essentially royalty after all." Mitsuki, still smirking, sauntered up the stairs and out of view.

A chill went up Naruto's spine, so he took a second to consult his resident psychologist.

'_Hey! What was that?!'_

The Kyuubi's booming laughter echoed through his mind. _**'That? **_**That was a trap. She's got something planned for you, kit.'**

Naruto's heart sped up at the thought. _'Why's she okay with us being close all of a sudden?'_

'**Her body language corroborated her speech and demeanor.'**

'_What?'_

The fox groaned. **'… Just go to sleep.'**

"Oh, Right." Naruto went up to his room and plopped down on his bed, staring up at the ceiling, he pondered Mitsuki's percieved change of heart, and also, Ino's confession. "Ah man. Now what?"

And with that, Naruto fell asleep, but not before feeling another chill run up his spine, he paid it no mind however.

* * *

Narutos' dream was of course focused around ramen, however, it was ruined when the Kyuubi appeared and started stomping on everything. Among the hundreds of people on the street, the fox singled out Naruto and began talking directly to him.

'**Wake up. You have a visitor.'**

'_Huh? … Oh… I'm asleep, aren't I?'_

Naruto's eyes snapped open and he turned to his clock radio, he'd been asleep several hours, and it was now about 2 in the afternoon. Turning to his other side, he was startled by a big pair of lavender eyes. It was Hanabi, she was staring at him, visibly annoyed.

"UWAAAAH! … Hanabi-chan?"

She silently handed Naruto the box of vibrating condoms that Anko had kept for herself. Her puppydog eyes were full of disappointment and jealousy; it was here that Naruto, against his better judgment, took the bait. He slid to the edge of the bed and sat up, patting a spot next to him. Hanabi, without a word sat next to him.

"Uzumaki-san… I wanted-"

Naruto sighed. "Yeah, I know. I'm sorry for using these on Anko-chan, especially since you were the one who bought them, that was disrespectful of me… But I can't do _that stuff _with you without feeling … ugh."

'_**Why not? It's no different from-'**_

'_Shut up! I'm trying not to say anything stupid!'_

'**Hah! **_**Good luck with that.'**_

Hanabi turned to Naruto, trying (and failing) to keep it together. "I-Is there something about me you find insufficient?"

Naruto gasped in horror as he realized the vagueness with which he answered her before. Hoping to leave less to interpretation, Naruto tried again in hopes of making the little girl feel better.

"It's just that… you don't have br-… too short… you're too short right now! Understand? Maybe when you're… _taller._"

Hanabi wiped her eyes and stared holes in Naruto's face. "I see… Ms. Anko is quite a bit taller than I am." Hanabi raised her eyebrow in suspicion. "… She also possesses significantly more developed mammary tissue than I."

Naruto winced and prepared for her to hit him, but it didn't come. When he opened his eyes, he saw Hanabi staring downward. She seemed calm and collected, but the way in which she grasped the open space in front of her chest said it all.

Hanabi turned to Naruto and made a suggestion. _"Perhaps if I-"_

Naruto put his finger over Hanabi's mouth mid sentence and chuckled a bit. "Most girls your age are more interested in clothes and dolls.._. _I'm flattered that you've taken a liking to me, but I'm just not attracted to girls your age, maybe when you get older._"_

Hanabi shook her head in disagreement. "By the time you consider me sufficiently developed enough for sexual intercourse, you'll have chosen someone else as your significant other. I must stake my bid on you as soon as possible."

Naruto sighed in exasperation and lied back down. "Sorry Hanabi-chan, I ca-"

Naruto was cut off when she jumped on top of him. Hanabi straddled his stomach and pinned his arms to the bed.

Naruto started to become nervous. "Hanabi-chan? What're you doing?"

She gave him the biggest puppy dog eyes he'd ever seen, obviously some sort of Hail Mary attempt to make him feel guilty for rebuffing her advances. Naruto struggled in her grip slightly; he'd forgotten how strong she was for her size.

Hanabi was practically begging, at least as much as a _Hyuga_ could beg. "Uzumaki-san. If I cannot have you now, I will wait. However, I'd like to make you a proposition."

Naruto turned his head slightly and looked up at the little girl in suspicion. "That depends on what it is."

Hanabi stared. "I'm fully aware of your date with my sister tomorrow. I can make sure it isn't sabotaged in any way, **_and _**I'll also let you call in a favor when your relationships inevitably get out of hand."

'_Should I say yes?'_

'_**What do you think genius?'**_

Naruto took the Kyuubi's advice at face value. "Alright, that sounds good! Whaddaya want in return?"

'… _**I was being sarcastic you fool.'**_

'_Wait what?!'_

Hanabi deadpanned, as if unaware of the magnitude of her request. "Just that you allow me to fill this vial with your sperm."

Naruto whimpered in regret as Hanabi started to release her grip on him.

Hanabi snatched the mortified Naruto's belt off and continued to speak. "Please, remove your pants for a few minutes so I can take my sample."

Naruto turned porcelain white as the reprecussions flashed before his eyes, Neji staring in disbelief, Hiashi trying to kill him, Hinata, crying her eyes out, and a pregnant Hanabi on his arm. The image alone had nearly given him an aneurism. Naruto yelped and thrashed, unintentionally launching Hanabi nearly ten feet into the air.

Naruto, finally coming to his senses, caught Hanabi by the shoulders, his patience wearing thin. "Why would you do that?! That's just wrong! Wrong on soooo many-"

Hanabi's genuine expression of confusion deflated Naruto's rant; perhaps she didn't put as much thought into the consequences of such an action.

"You object? My apologies. Hurting you couldn't be farther from my intentions Uzumaki-san. From what I've gathered, the male ejaculation reflex is heralded as a pleasurable experience. Have I been misinformed?"

Naruto was completely baffled as he stared at the 10-year-old girl before him. "Well, no, but you're just too young for me. How about I take you out for ice cream instead?"

Hanabi blankly stared. "I don't consider that quid pro quo in relation to my end of the agreement."

Naruto squinted and sighed. "You and your big words."

Naruto thought for a second and put Hanabi back on the ground once he came up with an idea. "Okay how 'bout this? I'll take you out for ice cream whenever you want until I call in your favor. That good?"

'_**That's a terrible idea.'**_

'_No one asked you!'_

Hanabi gave Naruto a serious look and stretched her pinky up to him. "Promise me."

Naruto locked his pinky with Hanabi's and grinned. "It's a promise! No turning back 'ttebayo!"

The Kyuubi flicked his tails back and forth and watched on in amusement, he gave Naruto one last warning before resigning to observation. _**'You're going to regret this.'**_

'_If I'm in the middle of a fight, feel free to give me advice, you're spot on with that sort of stuff, but things dealing with people? Yeah, I'll take my chances doin' my own thing.'_

Just as Naruto made his promise and told off the Kyuubi, a chill ran up his spine once more. He looked around the room, finding nothing, he looked down at Hanabi, she had a smug sort of half-smile on her face. Naruto hadn't so much as seen her lips curve upward since he'd been back, so he slapped his forehead in regret.

'_Lemme guess, she's got something planned for me too.'_

'**And there it is, your bound to a vague contract in which a female holds all the power, much like your human marriages. A short-sighted move altogether.**_**'**_

Hanabi gave Naruto one last stare of child-like infatuation and slipped out of his room, just then, some butlers barged in. "Namikaze-sama! There's an intruder on the property!"

Naruto shrugged. "Haven't seen'im."

Without a word, they left Naruto's room in search of Hanabi, who would be long gone by the time they'd combed the area.

* * *

The sand siblings nostalgically shuffled through Konoha's front gate. Staring at the statue of the first Hokage, Temari was the first to speak.

"Gaara-chan. You didn't have to pull me from my mission for this, right? This is just politics."

Gaara fidgeted, her face hiding the emotions that her posture broadcasted. "I want the both of you with me. I'm nervous, seeing as the implications of this request are huge, I'd be surprised if the Hokage didn't have us thrown out of the village."

Kankuro punched Temari in the shoulder. "Come on sis! She's about to go ask the Hokage if she can marry Konoha's single most valuable person, possibly joining our villages permanently. Shit I'd be nervous too."

Temari glared at the passersby who ogled her low cut kimono. "Sorry. You both know politics aren't exactly my thing."

Kankuro adjusted the carrying case on his back and started playing with a Kunai. "This stuff's actually pretty entertaining when you pay attention. It's a bunch of overblown, egotistical, sociopaths competing for a limited amount of space, kinda sad isn't it?"

Temari put a hand on her hip while they stopped. "Meh, whatever floats your boat. Gaara-chan, shall we?"

Gaara remained silent and started walking toward the Hokage's tower, obviously deep in thought. She was trying to picture Naruto's reaction, but having been unable to see him for 2 and a half years made her unsure of her prediction. So much could have changed in that amount of time, and she didn't want to chance ruining their friendship for the sake of political posturing. Gaara was so absorbed in her own thoughts, that she didn't even hear the chatter concerning her.

"Holy shit. Is that the sand girl from the Chuunin Exams?"

"I hear she's the Kazekage now, youngest ever."

"The one with the fan, she's the one that fought the Nara guy."

Temari and Kankuro were thrown off by their apparent reputation. Idle chatter concerning the exams three years prior were all over the place, someone even recognized Kankuro, who had only fought in the hidden arena within the Forest of Death. They were used to attention however, being directly related to the Kazekage tended to come with added visibility.

As the trio stepped into the Hokage's tower, Shizune immediately ushered them up to the top floor. They took the stairs because the elevator had an 'out of order' sign on it, the question was answered shortly after they reached the top floor. There was a huge dent in the door, like someone had slammed a bowling ball into it. Paying it no mind, Shizune knocked on the door gently.

"Tsunade-sama, the Kazekage is here to see you."

There was a pause, and then an answer. "Send her in."

Shizune opened the door and bowed to Gaara and her siblings, Gaara stepped in and Shizune closed the door, going on about her business. She groaned slightly, as she'd taken a peek at the letter Gaara had sent hours earlier and knew exactly why she was in Konoha.

Shizune huffed in jealousy. "Seems like you have to be the Kazekage to find a decent man around here."

* * *

Tsunade spun her chair to face Gaara and began tapping her desk. She smirked at the Kazekage and went right down to business.

"It's nice to see you kept that regent of yours out of this. I catch him ogling me one more time… ugh… So, Gaara-chan, I think I already know what your proposal is going to be, you wouldn't go jumping blindly into a political marriage would you?"

Gaara fiddled with her belt tassel and replied, a blank stare directed at the Hokage. "No, he saved me from myself during the Chuunin exams, and for that, I'm thankful. He's the reason I've come so far as a person, the reason I've become Kazekage."

Tsunade narrowed her eyes with intrigue, her smirk never subsiding. "So, why Naruto? Why not Neji Hyuuga, or one of the council members? That's usually how these things work, right?"

Gaara blinked. "The Sunagakure Ninja Council has been keeping an eye on the development of events concerning Naruto ever since the Chuunin Exams. We were unaware of the identity of your jinchuuriki until then, and they're convinced that he's next in line to become Hokage, catastrophic events notwithstanding."

Tsunade leaned back and thought for a bit. "How observant of them. However, I get the feeling there's more to it than that, the ninja world doesn't run on hunches and guesses."

"It… It was me who put them up to it just recently."

Tsunade clapped and laughed. "Oh that's precious! I'll tell you what, you go see him first and tell him what you have in mind. Then, bring him in, I want to hear his thoughts on all this ASAP."

Gaara perked up and locked her fingers. "It's possible to reach him now?"

Tsunade thought for a moment, she had vague memories of the night before, piecing the scenery together, she deduced that Naruto would probably want to stay under the radar for at least another day. From what she could remember, he was the cause of that fight in the streets.

"He's having some girl problems at the moment, so he probably wants to stay incognito for a little bit longer. I'll tell you what, this is his address." Tsunade scribbled on a sheet of paper and Gaara walked over to retrieve it.

Tsunade smiled. "Try and keep that one under wraps. He'd prefer _nobody_ knows this, but for you, I think he'll make an exception."

Gaara took the note card and bowed. "Thank you, Hokage-sama. I'll destroy this when I reach the destination."

Tsunade cheerfully waved. "No Gaara-chan, you can call me Mom." Gaara twitched at that one.

Gaara was a sight to behold when she stepped out of the office, Temari could spy a tiny smidgen of pink on her cheeks, and she was radiating anxiety despite her cool demeanor. Gaara passed them without a word, so Temari stood up from the waiting couch and peered over her baby sisters' shoulder.

"So, where're you going Gaara-chan?"

Gaara hastily stuffed the card into her cleavage so that her sister would'nt see the address. "Tsunade-sama said not to tell anyone. Get us a room in that hotel over there, we'll be in Konoha a few days at least."

Temari sighed. "I only brought one change of clothes." She whipped out her wallet and started counting off the bills she had.

Gaara didn't even look back. "I'll reimburse both of you."

Kankuro, who was listening the whole time, shrugged and jumped out the nearest window, this was an opportunity to blow all his money without any ill consequences.

Tsunade chuckled and turned to her window. "So, what do you think?"

Jiraiya walked in through the window, scribbling in a notepad, he was so absorbed in thought that he continued sticking to the ceiling as he scratched down his thoughts.

The Toad Sannin laughed and stuffed the note pad into his pocket. "I'm thinking we have a new frontrunner in the betting pool."

Tsunade scratched her head. "Not Sakura anymore huh?"

Jiraiya shook his head. "The Kazekage and Naruto are birds of a feather, you'd be surprised at how alike they are. Besides, Sakura's falling behind by my estimate. Let's just say that she _isn't_ the one taking him on a date tomorrow night."

Tsunade grunted in reply and wolf whistled, Jiraiya stared at her in confusion. The instant he was about to ask, every person working in the tower was inside Tsunade's office. Tsunade got up and flipped a picture on the wall around; there was a diagram on the backside. She dramatically added a sixth name to the tally and introduced it.

"Alright, the young Kazekage wants to marry Naruto. As per the rules, you're allowed to change your selection should a new girl join the pool. Any takers for Godaime Kazekage?"

Jiraiya stared incredulously as the room scrambled to rearrange their bets; it had become obvious that Tsunade had been keeping her _own_ tabs on Naruto since he'd returned, she even had Ino listed. Despite his awe, Jiraiya's authorial thought processes kicked in and he once again started scribbling in his notebook.

"Gold mine I tell ya! Gold mine! … Oi! Put me down for the Kazekage!"

* * *

Meanwhile, Sakura was busy fighting the urge not to bash her skull in with a flowerpot. Her most recent encounter with Naruto had once again ended with her in an awkward position. For one, she'd just essentially given him the go ahead to visit whenever he wanted, secondly, she had no idea how to cook steaks at all. She stared at the packaged meat on the table for several seconds before slamming it into the fridge.

"What the hell do I want?!"

The days had begun to run together for Sakura ever since Naruto came back, between her thoughts concerning Sasuke, and Naruto's newfound ability to unbalance her, she was a nervous wreck. It felt like her heart was being split in two, she'd spent the past two and a half years training, preparing herself so that she could stand with Naruto this time around. However, there was so much uncertainty growing within her, she didn't know what to believe anymore. What would she do when they finally came face to face with Sasuke? Would she freeze up? Would she allow them to kill each other? Her mind was a tornado of conflicting desires and emotions.

It was at this moment that she conceded one point, a small one, but a point nonetheless. She was physically attracted to Naruto. There was no getting around it, the blushing, the minced sentences, the same way she was around Sasuke during the early days of Team 7.

Sakura turned a slight shade of pink and sat down on her couch, her big brain's cogs turning furiously. It was an epiphany like no other, she felt guilty, guilty for having these feelings. Sakura was aware of, but incapable of comprehending Naruto's love for her. If she were to just begin pursuing him, what kind of message would that send? He made her the promise of a lifetime, and spent two and a half years fighting for control of his own body. Now she wants to negate all that and make goo-goo eyes at him? No. That's not right, she put him on this track, and she would see to it that she would be there with him until the very end. This was her promise; she had to do this not only for herself, but for Naruto _and _Sasuke as well.

* * *

"Namikaze-sama, you have a guest."

Naruto looked up from his desk, it was Mitsuki. He was currently experimenting with the Hiraishin seals on his hands, his progress was slow, but still visible.

"Thanks, who is it?"

"The Godaime Kazekage… You have some interesting connections."

Naruto scratched his head and tried to think back to his trip with Ero-Sannin, but he was dead sure that he hadn't made the acquaintance of any Kage recently.

"Oh, okay… Send the Kazekage in."

Mitsuki nodded and stepped back, she ushered an unseen person to enter the room, and the very instant she walked in, Naruto knew exactly who she was. Her sharp and calculating eyes were a dead giveaway, not to mention the large gourd on her back.

When she saw him, she froze, like a deer in headlights; Naruto stood up from his desk and slowly approached her, his smile growing larger with every passing moment. Without a word, he snapped her up into a bear hug.

"It's been a long time, Naruto, too long."

"I wanted to visit you, but I was having trouble with the Kyuubi all this time."

Naruto put Gaara back down and beamed. "Godaime Kazekage. I'm so proud of you Gaara-chan, you've come farther than I could've imagined."

Gaara's lips upturned slightly, not enough to be considered a smile though. "Only because of what you taught me. Thank you, Naruto."

Naruto laughed and scratched the back of his head. "So, what brings you to Konoha?"

Gaara flipped some sand out of her hair and redid her side-tail. "Konoha and Suna are making an arrangement, we want your opinion on it."

Naruto nodded and pulled on some black gloves, Gaara grabbed his hand, and they disappeared in a swirl of dust. Reappearing in Tsunade's office, the swirling dust reassembled into the shape of a gourd on Gaara's back.

Apparently, they'd interrupted something because everyone scrambled out of the room and Tsunade was standing awkwardly in front of a painting with a weird smile.

"Ero-Sannin? Why're you here?"

Jiraiya gave him a stupid grin. "I think I should be here for something as important as this!"

Naruto got that familiar chill up his spine once more, Gaara was holding his hand rather tightly. Her own hand was freezing and shaking slightly in spite of her apparent stoicism.

Naruto's expression turned to one of suspicion. "Why'm _I _here? Since when's _my_ opinion on politics matter?"

Tsunade whipped out a bottle of sake and grinned. "Gaara-chan is being offered to Konohagakure for a political marriage in order to further solidify our ties."

Naruto frowned at the floor. "Are you okay with this Gaara-chan?"

Gaara silently avoided Naruto's gaze.

When Naruto looked back to Tsunade, she was pouring a cup of sake.

"Drinking on the job again Baa-chan?"

Tsunade smirked. "No, Naruto-kun, this is for you. See, Gaara-chan is only going okay with such an arrangement if it's with you."

"What?"

Gaara looked up at Naruto, and in a pure deadpan, she uttered the most powerful words he'd ever heard from her.

_"Naruto, I want to marry you."_

Naruto blankly stared at her, his heart skipped a beat, and time stood still for a moment. It had been a few seconds before the Hokage started snapping her fingers in Naruto's face. When he came back to his senses, he stumbled over to Tsunade's desk and downed the cup of sake in one gulp; he pivoted and sat on the couch, deep in thought.

'**No.'**

'_Huh?'_

'**It's not the container; it's the one inside. I can't stand Shukaku one bit. Hell, I can hear him talking shit about me right now.'**

_'She's important to me.'_

_**'Is this really worth the trouble?'**_

'_I'll have Ino arrange a fight between you two if that'll convince you to at least see it through. I can't imagine what'd happen if I said no?'_

'_**Oh…. Hehehe. You get that fat lout in a cage with me just once. You won't hear another complaint concerning him ever again.' **_The Kyuubi's roaring laughter shook the sewer that was Naruto's mind.

Naruto finished thinking and smiled at Gaara, giving her the straightest answer he could muster.

"Gaara-chan, I'm not saying no, but I'm not saying yes either. See, I'm in a bit of a bind in my love life at the moment. You're the latest in a long line of interested women and I have to take their feelings into consideration."

Gaara started to fiddle with her belt again, so Tsunade piped up, offering a consolation. "We can officially list you two as engaged until you decide otherwise, not only will it please the councils, but it'll also allow you two to get a proper feel for each other."

Gaara smiled slightly and bowed to Tsunade. "Thank you for being so considerate of my situation, Tsunade-sama."

Tsunade took a drag from her bottle of sake and jumped over her desk. She gave Gaara her second bear hug of the day.

"You are so adorable! Like I said, call me Mom!"

Gaara turned a slight shade of pink when Tsunade included Naruto in her bear hug. Jiraiya had a victorious smirk on his face while he scribbled even more notes down.

"Oi Ero-Sannin! You're just gonna sit this one out?"

Jiraiya grinned. "Of Course not!" Jiraiya took the opportunity to pick Tsunade up and stuff his face into her cleavage, she let it slide of course… well… at least until Jiraiya's offhand comment.

"My favorite twins! How I've missed your sweet fragrance, and otherworldly softness!"

The Hokage would be needing another window that day.

* * *

Naruto spent the rest of the day showing Gaara around town, it was rather uneventful aside from that, and after seeing her off at her hotel, he went back home to see just what Mitsuki had in store for him.

Walking up the stairs of his home in anticipation, he came upon a hallway, at the end, was a glass door, leading to the observatory, the other door was likely Mitsuki's room. It was wide open, and as he approached it, she popped her head out into the hallway.

Naruto jumped at the vivid glow of her eyes in the dimly lit hallway. She smiled at him and motioned for him to come into her room. When he got in, there was that familiar pedestal, the one he'd stood on when Ino came over.

It was at this moment that Naruto noticed Mitsuki's clothing. She was wearing a form-fitting silk robe, Naruto could tell that she wasn't wearing much underneath it either, a fact made obvious by the amount of cleavage he could see.

"Uh, hey Mitsuki-chan."

She bowed, giving him a peek down her robe. "Namikaze-sama. I've picked out some outfits for your date tomorrow." With a demure smile, she gestured to some hangers on the bed.

"Namikaze-sama, please, remove your clothes."

_**'YEAAAAAAAH!'**_

The Kyuubi had let off a roar of jubilation mixed with lust. It was loud enough to startle Naruto, who was being ushered into Mitsuki's room. He would have taken the time to observe the room, but his mind was in the gutter at the moment, no thanks to the images the Kyuubi was feeding him. Naruto's more sophisticated mental faculties were certifiably out of order for the time being.

_'Gah! Don't do that you horny bastard! You almost made me scream!'_

Naruto took a deep breath and removed his t-shirt and shorts, leaving him with nothing but a pair of boxer shorts. He then stepped onto the pedestal. Mitsuki grabbed a stepping stool from the corner and picked a Haori from the set of clothes, placing it on Naruto's shoulders, she began to converse with him.

"So, the Kazekage… I'll have to admit, you shoot high. First the Hyuga Heiress and now the Godaime Kazekage."

Naruto adjusted the Haori slightly and Mitsuki paced around him in a circle. "I honestly didn't know she'd come so far in just three years. I was pleasantly surprised!"

Mitsuki fiddled with the belt to Naruto's Haori, switching it out for a higher quality one. "As was she. I know you couldn't see it, but she's infatuated with you."

Naruto chuckled. "Yeah, I figured that part out when she asked me to marry her."

Naruto couldn't see Mitsuki's face when he'd said that, so the envious lights in her eyes were unseen to him.

"And how did you answer her proposition Namikaze-sama?" Mitsuki had expertly disguised the jealousy in her voice.

Naruto inhaled sharply when she playfully ran her finger from his back to his stomach. When Naruto looked at her, she was smirking in curiosity.

"We're engaged by default 'cause of politics, but there won't actually be a ceremony until my girl issues blow over and I choose her."

"Good news for the other girls I suppose."

Mitsuki stepped onto the pedestal with Naruto much like before and this time, she intentionally pressed her breasts into him while she began to comb his hair. Naruto was focusing on everything but her in order to keep himself from getting a boner and making this awkward beyond belief. Unbeknownst to Naruto, she'd intentionally placed the mirror so that it would be the only thing in his field of vision. All Naruto could see was the outline of Mitsuki's butt through the robe. Needless to say, it wasn't doing much for his composure; he could now confirm 100% that she was completely naked beneath the silk robe.

Mitsuki caught on to his realization, and to spare him the embarrassment, she stepped off of the pedestal, mocking him with a slight squint. Naruto quietly exhaled while Mitsuki spoke to him again.

Mitsuki pulled Naruto's Haori off, once again exposing him.

"You know, I think you should forgo an undershirt this time. Just wear the Haori and some pants."

Naruto shuddered. "That may not be such a good idea. Last time-"

Mitsuki put a hand up and silenced Naruto. "I know who she is, she's a rather quiet girl. Awkward silences will happen frequently, so I think you can at least give her something to stare at. Besides, traditional Fire Country clothing has always been rather revealing, it's hot here. Noble men didn't wear shirts for several centuries."

Naruto pouted. "But what about all the staring that gets me? She might start getting possessive or something!"

Mitsuki slowly ran her fingers down Naruto's torso and stopped to admire his abs. "You should risk it. I won't have you tarnishing your family's name trying to fill an awkward silence, that's usually when the most offensive things are said."

Naruto didn't hear a word she said, he was too busy trying to keep his cool.

Mitsuki continued to touch him all over. "You are rather well built. Perhaps something to accentuate your shoulders…"

Naruto's face heated up when Mitsuki pulled him down by the hand, she grabbed another haori from her bed and deftly put Naruto in it.

"Namikaze-sama, I like this one, what do you think?"

Mitsuki went behind Naruto and maneuvered him in front of the mirror, she slowly and meticulously did his belt, the fact that she was so close to Naruto's crotch, even touching it a few times, made him twitch. Mitsuki smiled.

"You're _really_ well built…" She whispered aloud (intentionally of course), Naruto heard this and shivered, seeing as her mouth was only a few inches from his ear. It almost sounded like she was cooing to him, almost. Mitsuki finally managed to push him over the edge when she pressed into Naruto's back and deliberately plucked a piece of lint of the front of his underwear.

Naruto's appendage now was making a tent in his boxer shorts; he turned bright red, then and there. Mitsuki grinned at his flustered expression and gave a hearty laugh.

"Hey uh, Mitsuki-chan?"

She triumphantly smirked at Naruto in the mirror, blatantly admiring her handiwork. "It's fine, really. In all honesty, I'd be insulted if your friend _didn't _come out to play."

Naruto nervously chuckled at her euphemism, but gasped when she abruptly spun him around, her nose was touching his, and the tent in his boxers was pressed up against her lower stomach. She swiftly removed the haori and pinched him on the cheek.

**'Damned tease. Alas, one can't help but take the bait.'**

Naruto didn't even bother responding to the fox, between the adrenaline rush, and the embarrassing situation he was just in, he just wanted to crawl into a hole and die.

"Let's pick this up tomorrow evening before your date, Namikaze-sama." She slowly straightened his boxer shorts, smirking at him. "_**That**_ was for kissing me in Wave Country. If your date goes well, maybe I'll be more open toward you doing things to me without my permission."

Mitsuki promptly ushered Naruto out her door, he was still in his underwear, so it made for a rather awkward sight when a few maids spotted Naruto sneaking out of the head staffer's room half-naked. Naruto immediately went down to his room, and took the coldest, longest shower he'd ever had.

* * *

The following day had flown by like no other. Between Mitsuki getting him all hot and bothered, and his rapidly approaching date with Hinata, Naruto's mind was all over the place. It also didn't help that he had to meet with Mitsuki again so that she could finish coaching him. She slapped an ornate sleevless haori over his shoulders and gave him an orange sash and some black pants.

Between the teasing, the thin robe, and her blatant disregard for his personal space, Naruto didn't retain anything Mitsuki had said to him. As the clock struck 6:50 Mitsuki had finished her work on Naruto, who was a sight to behold. She'd stuck to her guns, dressing him up in a more traditional style for the night. The Uzumaki estate had recently received a message from the Hinata herself, and it was decided that the majority of the night would be spent at the Summer Festival, hence the clothing. After an awkward exit, Naruto made his way to where Hinata had asked to meet him.

He was dressed in a sleeveless grey haori. Said haori was wide open, exposing Naruto's stomach and chest, the only thing keeping it from fluttering wildly in the wind was the Orange sash Mitsuki had picked out for him. He also wore a white hakama tied at the ankles by orange cloth, much like his belt. Naruto also wore his trademark crystal necklace, a decision he would immediately regret as he moved through the streets to meet Hinata. It tended to glow at night, as such, it attracted unwanted attention to his partially exposed torso. Between the squealing fangirls and gawking bystanders, Naruto began to feel as if he were naked, much like his first day back. Naruto stared at the ground most of the way, trying to avoid eye contact with anyone, a task near impossible considering the number of eyes trained on him. Naruto had to be able to see where he was going, so he looked up. He'd accidentally made eye contact with a group of girls, who also appeared dressed for the festival.

_'Ah crap.'_

One of them waved at Naruto, and the rest of them realized that Naruto was looking in their direction, so they gestured for him to come over and talk. Naruto looked at a clock in a shop window, 6:52. They _were_ heading the same direction, so Naruto considered using them as a sort of shield, at least until Hinata arrived.

A girl, about a head shorter than Naruto, was the first to talk to him when he walked over. "You're the _Blonde Pretty Boy_, aren't you?"

Naruto shrugged and smiled. "I guess." "Heh! I didn't know I had a nickname like that!"

They all giggled and started whispering amongst themselves, so the same girl asked him another question. "People don't usually come to the Summer Festival by themselves, where's your date?"

Naruto was about to speak, but another girl in the group beat him to it. "I heard that Ino Yamanaka got to you first. It's her, isn't it?"

Naruto's expression went unreadable, he had a slight smile on his face at the mention of her name. "No, not today."

"Today? So you don't have a steady girlfriend yet?"

Naruto chuckled and scratched the back of his head. "Nah, I'm in a pretty odd situation at the moment when it comes to girls." The girls didn't hear a word he'd said though, when he'd put his arms behind his head, he exposed his chest and stomach for everyone to see. It went silent among the group, Naruto opened his slitted eyes and looked around himself, they were staring at him, wide eyed.

"You're... really buff, do you work out a lot?"

"No, not really." Naruto reached into his haori and flashed his forehead protector.

"Whoa! You're a ninja? That's so cool! Got any crazy mission's you're allowed to talk about?"

Naruto seriously thought about it and decided to be vague. "I was in wave country just recently. I was... bounty hunting. Sorry, most of my stuff is classified."

"Oh it's fine, ninja are full of secrets."

Naruto spotted the meeting place and abruptly stopped walking.

"Not coming with us?"

Naruto shook his head and grinned as he saw who he was waiting for, Hinata was about a hundred meters away. "I'd love to, but my date's on her way here."

The group of girls acknowledged this and moved away, but not too far, they wanted to see who 'Pretty Boy' was waiting for. Just then, Naruto heard a 'psst' coming from a pocky stand. There was a serious looking man staring at him, with his arms crossed, he motioned toward a barrel next to the counter.

Naruto stared at the barrel a second and Hanabi poked her head out of it.

He raised his eyebrow at her. "Hey, Hanabi-chan. How're things looking tonight, should we avoid the festival?"

With the barrel cap still on her head, Hanabi gave him the rundown of what he would have to watch for. "Uzumaki-san, no one relevant seems to have caught wind of your date, but word will spread quickly as the night progresses. In light of that, I've convinced Neji-san to assist me in counter sabotage."

Just then, the scary looking stand attendant poofed into a pillar smoke, Neji stepped from the cloud. "Naruto, I may be assisting you on this date of yours, but do not believe for one second that I won't punish you for reprehensible conduct."

Naruto turned and grinned at Neji. "But reprehensible conduct is part of who I am!" Hanabi and Neji glared at Naruto. "Geez, why're you all so serious all the time?" Naruto spotted Hinata closing in, so he nodded to Neji and Hanabi and moved away from the stand. Hanabi returned to her barrel, and Neji re-activated his henge.

Naruto had seen what Hinata was wearing when she first stepped onto the street, but he was too far away to appreciate it the first time. Naruto became more and more dumbstruck as she got closer and he could see her in greater detail. By the time they were face to face, Naruto of all people, was tongue tied.

She had a white and silver kimono that was obviously made of expensive silk. The floral patterns on it did nothing to detract from her purple obi. Lastly, the back half of her hair was in a high ponytail while she left the front alone to frame her face. Hinata demonstrated the 'less is more' proverb perfectly, if Naruto could turn heads, people stopped to stare at the Hyuga Heiress.

Hinata walked, no, more like bounced over to Naruto, her excitement was palpable. "I'm so glad you didn't cancel on me, Naruto-kun."

Naruto fumbled through his sentence. "Thanks, uuh, uhm. You look incredible. Hehe! I kinda feel underdressed."

The Hyuga smiled and walked closer to Naruto, locking her arm with his. Naruto's eyes began to dart around with apprehension. "Naruto-kun, you don't need to worry about anything, I've planned the whole night in advance."

Naruto directed her attention away from himself and to the surroundings. "Hinata-chan, It's not our date I'm worried about."

When Hinata looked up, she immediately caught on to what Naruto was worried about. Even with all the activities going on around them, nearly every pair of eyes on the street was locked on to Naruto, who, while dashing and clean cut, was a sneeze away from being shirtless. That, or, they gawked at Hinata, who could pass for the daughter of a daimyo.

As the street began to grind to a screeching halt, Naruto groaned.

'_I'm in for a long night.'_

'_**No shit.'**_

* * *

AN: While I wanted to write a little more concerning Naruto's date, I think that's enough for this specific chapter. So much has happened that I don't want to overload you guys with information. It would cheapen the date I have planned. Let me tell you, I've got some great stuff in mind for it. Almost all of chapter 21 will be devoted to Naruto's night out, come prepared to laugh next time, because I've been watching the hangover movies recently. Your faves and reviews are greatly appreciated. Until next time!

_~Breath of the Wiz_

_Signin' off_


	21. Chapter 21: Date Night Part I

AN: Alright, here's part 1 of the date night, now... Watch as things begin to spiral out of control! Naruto's in for some shit.

* * *

Our hero fidgeted slightly in the silent street and shuffled closer to Hinata. The girls Naruto had walked over with, had slouched in defeat the minute the stunning Hinata had bounced over to him.

The Hyuuga heiress had recently become the talk of the village upon Hiashi's retraction of his previous statements concerning who would succeed him. It was originally Hanabi who would take the seat, but following Hinata's jump in maturity and decisiveness, the choice had once again become obvious.

Speak of the devil, Hanabi, who watched from her barrel could care less about taking the position of clan head; the only thing on her mind was a blonde ninja. Plan after plan, hypothetical after hypothetical, Hanabi's mind was racing as she watched from her hiding spot. This had a small chance to go ugly; but there was little chance of that happening. Just in case, Hanabi readied herself to interfere if necessary.

Naruto frantically tried to come up with a way to direct attention away from himself and his date, but apparently he didn't need to. Hinata, who either hadn't noticed the wandering eyes, or just didn't give a damn, had taken Naruto's hand. She had much smaller hands than he did, something Naruto noticed when he looked down. They were dainty and soft, two traits uncommon to the hands of a ninja.

Hinata, slightly pink in the face, urged him to come with her.

"Naruto-kun, let's go." The slight upturn of her lips put him at ease so he followed.

'Well, if it doesn't matter to her… Whatever, I've got Neji and Hanabi running interference for me.'

Naruto took a breath and discarded his worries for the evening. With a grin and an affirmative reply, the head-turning couple started down the street. Behind them, a barrel with two skinny legs sticking out of the bottom scuttled across the rooftops, scanning for any potential party crashers. With none in sight, Hanabi hopped out of her barrel and watched Naruto and Hinata from above. They'd stopped at one of the stands to play a game.

Naruto tried flipping a ring neatly onto a neck in the sea of bottles in front of him. This would be an impossible task, seeing as anything involving finesse was something Naruto was never quite adept at. Naruto's eye twitched as his ring bounced off of yet another bottle top.

"Ano, Naruto-kun? Perhaps you could let me try?"

Naruto hung his head and handed his ring to Hinata, she tossed it… and it too bounced away. Naruto became confused when this happened, because the plastic ring seemed to stick for a second and then flew out.

"Hmmm." Naruto grabbed his chin, appearing deep in thought. In reality, it was his special way of asking for mental assistance.

The lounging fox groaned and flicked the bars of his cage. _**'What, is that my cue or something?'**_

'_Yeah! What's up with this game?'_

The fox mocked Naruto, referring to his earlier instructions._**'Oh? If my memory serves correctly, you only wanted my input as it pertained to combat.'**_

'_I'll be honest; I'm not to keen on… social stuff. You can at least warn me if I'm getting screwed right?'_

'_**As you wish, kit.'**_

'_What's goin' on here?'_

'_**For starters, how do you think these establishments keep you ninja from taking home all the prizes every year huh? The bottlenecks are playing a trick on your eyes, they're closer together than they look. It's actually physically impossible to win this game without blatantly cheating, or being extremely lucky... I don't even know why you came over here in the first place.'**_

'_How can you tell? This isn't genjutsu or anything.'_

'_**No, it's better. Old-fashioned optical illusion, the first jinchuuriki you vermin sealed me into knew the one who created this game. I had nothing better to do at the time, so I took notes... Now get out, I'm trying to sleep.'**_

'_What about my social problems?'_

'_**You're on your own for the night, just don't get anyone pregnant and I'll help you with damage control tomorrow morning.'**_

Naruto was booted back into reality, he was about to pull Hinata away from the stand, but a flash of purple caught his eye. Naruto squinted and focused his vision so that he could see between the gaps in the wooden backboard of the stand.

Naruto's heart literally punched the inside of his chest when he saw the purple kimono's flowing platinum blonde hair in the gaps of the stand. Naruto appeared to be perfectly fine, but inwardly, his mind was racing.

'_ABORT! ABORT! We gotta go!'_

'**What a coincidence... Well, I'm turning in for the night.' **Naruto suddenly felt emptiness in his skull, as if the fox's heavy breathing had disappeared from his minds' eye.

Hinata looked at Naruto when he didn't answer her, to anyone else, he appeared fine. His gentle smile masked an internal hurricane, something Hinata was quite adept at sensing.

"Naruto-kun? Something is bothering you."

Naruto was snapped out of his frantically planning stupor. "Huh? No I'm fine!" Naruto was thrown off by the fact that she hadn't asked a question, it was more like a statement, she could tell something was wrong.

Naruto pulled her close and whispered in her ear, Hinata turned pink at his sudden action and listened closely to her crush.

"_Hinata-chan, I think I just saw Ino. We need to get out of here before she sees me and does something... clever."_

Hinata's eyes widened and a look somewhere between fury and determination snapped over her normally blushing visage. She roughly snatched Naruto's hand and jumped over the nearest building, pulling him with her. As they were passing over the roof, Hinata passed Hanabi and nodded to her. Hanabi took this as her cue, she immediately went the opposite direction, toward Ino.

Hanabi whistled and used henge, her ninja gear became a black and silver kimono, Neji appeared next to her in his standard ninja clothes. They hopped from their spot on the roof and intentionally walked out in front of Ino. Ino perked up and hooked her fingers with Hanabi's as the young girl passed.

"Hey there Hanabi-chan!" She slipped a lollipop into Hanabi's fingers and exchanged greetings with Neji.

Ino bent down so that she was face to face with Hanabi, a bright smile was stretched across her face.

"You wouldn't happen to have seen Naruto-kun, would you?"

A devious upturn of the lips slithered across Hanabi's face, even though it was a tiny smirk, Ino slowly recoiled in suspicion, as any facial expression from Hanabi besides a neutral one was a warning of treachery.

"What is the location of Uzumaki-san worth to you?"

Ino looked to Neji in protest; he was obviously pretending to admire the paper lanterns, as if he weren't part of the conversation.

Ino scowled down at the preteen. "Whaddaya want?"

Hanabi placed her hands behind her back and innocently swayed back and forth on her toes.

"Take this earpiece and follow my instructions for the rest of the night. If you do, I'll engineer a situation in which you will cross paths with Uzumaki-san." When Hanabi brought her hands back around, she was holding an earpiece and a receiver collar.

Ino reluctantly took the earpiece and the collar and put them on. Hanabi stared blankly and Neji bowed to Ino, they promptly disappeared in a blur and a gust of wind.

Ino slapped her forehead. "_Why _did I just do that?"

* * *

Sakura had also decided to try her luck finding some level of entertainment at the festival for the night. She'd at first arrived with the Konoha 11, minus Naruto, Hinata, Ino, and Neji, but eventually, she'd slipped away when Lee had accidentally gotten a hold of some sake and started trashing the restaurant they were in. Her thoughts concerning Sasuke and Naruto were at first, clear-cut, her resolve had been tempered… at least until now.

The more she thought about it, the less it made sense, her desire to hunt Sasuke down and bring him back had only intensified over the years, but ever since Naruto had returned, only then did she have doubts about how it would all play out. She got the feeling that Sasuke will have moved on from them all by now, but her thoughts were cut short when she heard a familiar voice.

"Ne, Sakura-chan, you should watch where you're going in a crowded place like this."

Sakura's head snapped up and she saw Kakashi getting up from the dusty road, a woman with long purple hair smirked as she helped him up, Yugao something-or-other.

Sakura bowed and apologized. "Sorry Kakashi-sensei, I was lost in my own thoughts."

Kakashi patted the dust off his navy kimono and shook his head. "No kidding, that felt like walking into a steel door. If you were taller, you'd have broken my nose."

Sakura, emotionally confused at the moment, sighed and fired back. "Ah rub some dirt in it."

Kakashi scratched his head and raised his eyebrow. "Right… Aren't you supposed to be a medic? That's not very professional of you."

Yugao fished an errant pebble out of Kakashi's hair. "Don't push her Kashi-chan, she's love-sick." Yugao's eyes swiveled to Sakura, there was a playful light in them. "Naruto's got you all twisted in a knot, doesn't he?"

Sakura spoke freely. "Ugh, I _**wish**_ it were that simple." Her eyes widened and she suddenly slapped her hands over her mouth, cursing her outburst. Kakashi, despite his mask, was obviously smirking, he found Naruto's situation rather entertaining. This was primarily due to the fact that Jiraiya would likely be writing a novel detailing these events sometime in the future, one he would take special interest in.

Kakashi put his arm around Yugao, who also had an amused smirk on her face. "So, are you looking for Naruto?"

Sakura pouted. "_No! _… Yes." She hung her head in defeat, seeing as she was speaking to someone who could easily find Naruto for her.

Yugao piped in. "We saw him with Hinata Hyuga a few minutes ago, so he's at this festival somewhere… Kashi-chan can help you find him if you give us good show."

Sakura shifted nervously when she heard Hinata's name. "H-hinata? … What's she doing here with him?"

Kakashi decided to press a few of Sakura's buttons for shits and giggles. "They're on a date. What, didn't he tell you?"

Sakura's emotional stability was already off-kilter, but now, she'd completely boiled over in anger, confusion, jealousy, and fear. She kept a straight face, but the bulging vein on her forehead said it all.

Sakura slid over to her teacher and for once, gave _him _an order. "Kakashi-sensei, get your dogs and find Naruto for me. Now."

Kakashi smirked. "Thought you'd never ask, I guess we _are _getting a show tonight Yugao-chan." He made a single hand sign and from that point on, this night would be one to remember.

* * *

On a distant rooftop, Jiraiya and Tsunade watched, their eyes still and focused in anticipation… Well, _one_ of them was focused on the exchange between Kakashi, Yugao, and Sakura, the other… on a note pad.

Tsunade rolled her eyes. "Jiraiya, shouldn't you be focused on the situation as it unfolds, you know, like a normal person?"

Jiraiya held his finger up to shush Tsunade, much to her annoyance. "Hold on, let me finish this note… Now whadja say?"

"Isn't your only pupil's safety more important than your perverted books?" Tsunade poked him in the temple, really hard.

Jiraiya grunted in pain and glowered at Tsunade, he chirped back. "_The ones that you seem to enjoy reading_? … If you're bored, I can give you a free mammogram. You _are_ around that age you know."

Tsunade glared at Jiraya and paused, he was busy ignoring her though, leering through his binoculars and taking notes. Tsunade took the opportunity to twist Jiraiya's ear, she whispered.

"Jiraiya, do you know how _**easy**_ it is to rip the human ear from the skull?"

Jiraiya swallowed to bite back some of the pain, he was scared, but deep down, he knew she wouldn't do anything to him that she couldn't stitch back together. In light of that, he decided to push an entirely different button on Tsunade's emotional circuit board.

Jiraiya gave a lecherous chuckle and delivered his one two punch. "You can have my ear if you want, but in return, I want you to start using the handcuffs on me again. I kinda miss'em… don't you?"

Tsunade sputtered in surprise mixed with annoyance, she immediately let go of his ear and went to the opposite end of the roof, choosing to face away from him as she sat on the edge.

Jiraiya chuckled as he scribbled down a few more notes. '_Every time._'

Just then, an ANBU agent appeared behind Tsunade. "Hokage-sama, I've located Naruto Uzumaki. He's on a date with Hinata Hyuga at the Black Lotus Restaurant. Shall I give you directions?"

Tsunade shook her head and dismissed the agent. "No, that's all… _Black Lotus_ is it? Jiraiya, when was the last time our reservations actually came through at that place?"

Jiraiya, still concentrated on his notepad, answered Tsunade without thinking. "It _has_ been a while, pre-menopause at _least_."

Jiraiya promptly caught a foot to the back of his head, sending him flying from the roof.

A yelp of pain, followed by a dazed call to the Hokage made her smile in a somewhat sadistic manner.

"Love you too, Tsunade-hime."

The Hokage rolled her eyes and started to laugh a bit, thinking back to the days when everything made sense for her. For the 5th Hokage, the only real constant left in her life was Jiraiya, everyone else was either dead, or Orochimaru. Tsunade looked over the edge and called down to her Ex-Boyfriend/Not Really Ex-Boyfriend/Almost Husband But Not Quite/Former Teammate/Emotional Crutch.

"Get up here, you old fool, we're going to the Black Lotus. I have a betting pool to win."

Jiraiya appeared on the roof in a blur, looking dejected. "You can't go yourself?"

"Remember our anniversary? You still owe me dinner."

Jiraiya hunched slightly and smiled nervously, his failure to show up on time to his own anniversary was still fresh in his mind. "Oh. Right… How are we getting in exactly?"

Tsunade walked to another edge of the roof, her back was to him. "I'm the Hokage Jiraiya, I'll make something happen... Just show up on time. I _swear, _if you're late again-…"

* * *

Meanwhile, at said restaurant, Naruto and Hinata were busy trying to break the awkward silence in a non-awkward way. The Black Lotus was easily the most exclusive restaurant in the entire village, so it was rather quiet. There were only about five or six other couples there for the night, so the task of breaking this silence was entirely on Naruto and Hinata. Doing so without seeming crude is generally dubious, but that didn't stop Naruto from trying.

He took a deep breath and addressed Hinata, who was nervously looking at everything in the room but him. "I don't wanna to sit here in silence all night, sooo… What've you been doing since you returned?"

Hinata smiled a bit and paused; she looked Naruto in the eye and spoke, but what he heard had nothing to do with his question.

"I love you, Naruto-kun."

"Um… thanks! Heheheh!"

Naruto flushed slightly and grinned, rubbing the back of his head. Hinata continued to speak, but not before she took his hand from across the table.

Hinata started to become dejected as she continued her sentence. "Naruto-kun, I just want to make my intentions clear to you… Everyone else has their own reasons for pursuing you now… I'm afraid of getting drowned out."

Naruto stared at Hinata's dainty hands. "So, what are your reasons?"

Hinata unconsciously squeezed, her soft voice forced Naruto to listen closely, what he heard made him feel a lump in his throat.

"I admired you, your determination, your ability to love unconditionally. The things I strived to be at the time came so naturally to you, and I found that amazing... That was nearly ten years ago, over time, my admiration for you had evolved, I didn't want to be like you anymore, I wanted to be with you. It's like… you complete me."

Naruto stared directly into Hinata's eyes, his face displaying an expression somewhere between flattered and proud.

"Ano… Naruto-kun? Why are you looking at me like that?"

Hinata turned a shade of pink Naruto had never seen before.

Naruto did his fox grin and and gestured for her to continue. "Ah, it's nothing. Keep on talking."

She fidgeted and looked down for a few seconds, Naruto stared in anticipation. When her head came back up, she had some sort of look on her face, Naruto couldn't quite find the word for it, but it was akin to the sensation of waking up from an incredible dream.

"I can honestly say, with all my heart, that these past two years have been the emptiest of my life without you… Naruto-kun, you're my hero, and I want..."

She trailed off, primarily because she realized how long she'd been staring into Naruto's eyes, she felt like she was being sucked into them.

Naruto's mind was racing, and with no input from the Kyuubi for the night, his thoughts were left un-interrupted. Hinata's love for him was hands down the purest of the any of the girls, something he found endearing. Ino's love for him was intensified by envy, she meant well, but in the end, her love is based on a negative emotion. Anko was… ambiguous at best, likely spurned on by lust. Mitsuki's desires and intentions were clouded by pride, she was moving out of that, but the question remained, whether or not she could see beyond her duty and look at the bigger picture. As for Gaara, she'd chosen this, but her hand had been forced by the greed of others. Sakura on the other hand… well... _she_ hasn't been making much sense since he got back.

Naruto snaped back to reality, surprised at his ability to stop and analyze the intentions of those around him. With his newfound deductions in mind, he grinned at Hinata once more and followed up on her confession.

"So I'm your hero… It's nice to know I've been doing _something_ right. All I wanted was to find someone who would acknowledge me, turns out, my biggest fan had been right behind me the whole time."

Naruto sighed and looked slightly remorseful. "I wish I wasn't so dense back then, I mean, I'm no social butterfly, but I can at least comprehend what I mean to other people now. I makes me feel... wonderful, knowing that I mean so much to you."

"Hinata-chan, If someone here deserves my attention the most, it's you. Even before all… this stuff happened to my body, you've…"

Hinata was practically lying on the table, trying to close the distance so she could hear him.

Naruto, thrown off by her strange posture invited her to make the moment less awkward. "Uh… do ya wanna sit next to me?"

Hinata, still holding Naruto's hands, turned beet red. Adorning an anxious yet picturesque smile, she gave a childish nod and strolled around the table. She sat on the edge of the booth, almost a foot away from Naruto. She started pressing her fingers together, afraid to move closer. Naruto, growing impatient, swiftly grabbed her by the hips and slid her next to him.

Naruto chuckled. "You've gotta sit _right _next to me if you're gonna be on this side of the booth."

Hinata tensed at Naruto's sudden action, but didn't resist or protest in any way, after her flightiness subsided, she slowly, but surely began to rest her head on Naruto's shoulder.

Her voice was soft and airy. "I'm sorry for being so nervous around you. I'm… still reeling from the thought of us being together like this; only in my dreams did moments such as these happen. Now, I'm actually here…"

Naruto twitched slightly, something Hinata caught on to, but she had no idea why he would move in such a way. From Naruto's perspective however, it was for rather obvious reasons.

He'd only just now realized how well endowed Hinata was, primarily because she was pressing her chest into his arm. Along with that, her act of leaning on the table had forced her kimono to loosen at the neck, revealing a noteworthy amount of cleavage.

Hinata could tell Naruto was on edge again, so she flipped her Byakugan on. Nothing noteworthy. She leaned in and put her other hand on his shoulder. Looking up at him, she inquired.

"Is there something wrong Naruto-kun?"

Naruto shook his head. "Nah, it's fine."

There was a draft from an open window and the sudden chill made Hinata realize that her kimono was starting to open, well, that and she'd failed to realize up until just then that she'd been pressing her chest all over him.

Hinata became tomato red at her realization and covered her face, her voice was completely muffled, but Naruto caught the gyst of what she was saying to him.

Naruto chuckled a bit, and jokingly retorted. "Nah, it's fine, really."

Hinata tightened her obi and looked the other way, hiding a bashful smile. "Ano, Naruto-kun?"

"What is it Hinata-chan?"

She fidgeted and started twiddling her thumbs, slowly. "So I… I've told you how I feel, but I'd like to know what you think of me."

Naruto looked out the window and allowed his thoughts to run free, saying whatever came to his mind.

"I don't know _what _to think at anything this point, I'm just taking it all day by day... So many people want to have everything to do with me all of a sudden, but you… you've been there from the start, even if I didn't know at the time. Just like Kakashi-sensei, just like Iruka, just like the 3rd Hokage, and even Ero-Sannin. All I know for certain, is that I feel a connection with you that I don't have with anyone else… and it makes me feel-"

Naruto peeled Hinata off of him and took a good long look at her.

"close to you."

Naruto started to lean toward Hinata, and she toward him. Their lips nearly met when they both felt chills run up their spines. They simultaneously snapped backward and halfheartedly looked around the restaurant. The other couples were paying them no mind, but there was a bit of a commotion at the door.

Naruto's heart sunk when he heard a nervous _'Hokage-sama?' _and hushed voices in conversation.

Naruto slid Hinata out of the booth and placed her on her feet, standing up right behind her. "Hinata-chan? I think we should leave, Obaa-chan's here."

"Who exactly is 'Obaa-chan' Naruto-kun?"

"Oh, right… that's what I call the Hokage. I can tell ya for sure that she'll mess up our night if she sees us."

Hinata looked at the bill and left the correct amount on the table, this amount happened to be a fat stack of cash, so Naruto took a look at the bill. He'd eaten the equivalent of a B-rank mission's paycheck. Naruto's eyes nearly popped out of his head, as he'd failed to realize how expensive everything at the restaurant was, not to mention the absurdly small portions they dolled out.

Naruto slid over to Hinata to apologize. "Sorry about the bill Hinata-chan. I didn't mean to eat away that much cash."

Hinata became confused. "What? Oh no, it's fine, my father gave me some money for the night."

Naruto continued counting the zeroes on the bill and muttered to himself. "_Some?" _

Their waiter for the evening interrupted Naruto's train of thought.

He was an older man with a bushy mustache and a serious look in his eye. "Hinata-sama, do you require anything else?"

Hinata paused a moment, since only one person addressed her as such. She turned beet red. "Neji-san?! You were the waiter this whole time?!"

The man nodded in affirmation. "Yes, it is I. I'm sorry for spying on you, but Hanabi asked me to help her ensure the smoothness of your date… You said that you needed a way out, correct?"

Hinata was busy dealing with the thought of Neji seeing her previous exchange with Naruto, so her date made the decision on her behalf.

"We gotta get outta here Neji."

The man looked around the restaurant and gestured for the two ninja to follow him.

"Alright, follow me then."

Neji took them through the kitchen just as Tsunade and Jiraiya walked into the restaurant, dressed in their finest clothing. Their heads swiveled around as their waitress took them to their table. It was only after they sat down that they recognized Naruto and Hinata's absence from he restaurant.

Jiraiya started to grin. "They're not here anymore… _you know what that means_." He whipped out his note pad and got up from the table… or at least attempted to get up from the table. Tsunade had grabbed a fistful of his ponytail and yanked him back into his seat.

Tsunade slid a menu across the table. "We'll find them later, _you _still owe me dinner and a satisfying anniversary."

Jiraya pouted, but didn't complain. Unbeknownst to Tsunade, her favorite plunging dress was Jiraiya's favorite plunging dress as well.

"Jiraiya, what're you staring at?"

Jiraiya took his eyes off Tsunade and flipped open the menu, eying the appetizers. "... The reasons my standards are so screwed up."

Tsunade paused and poured herself some sake. "You've never been to good at giving complements, you know that?"

* * *

-bzzt- "I want you to purchase them for me." The radio chatter was full of static, but Ino still understood Hanabi's orders.

The blonde looked at the items quizzically. By themselves, they were relatively innocuous, but there was no telling what Hanabi's devious little mind had concocted. She'd asked Ino to buy her a spool of ninja-wire, some epoxy adhesive, a broom handle, some metal rings, and lastly, some bricks, of which she was _extremely_ specific concerning their color and size.

Ino was in the back of a hardware store… in a kimono… during Konoha's annual Summer Festival. The scene in general was rather outlandish, but nobody was in the store but her, so it didn't really matter. Ino had the items laid down in front of her, organized in order of weirdness. She stared down at the items in bewilderment, she could think of several uses for these items, most of them benign. However, Hanabi was the one who wanted them, so there was no telling what she planned to use the odds and ends for.

Ino whispered into her earpiece. "Hanabi, what exactly are you planning to do with these items?"

"_It's of little concern to you. It's for a project I'm working on… Now, there is one more task I need you to complete, then I can take you to see Naruto."_

Ino growled a bit. "How do I even know you're going to follow through on this?"

Some static followed by a bout of sincerity put Ino at ease. _"Hyuga always keep their promises, that's what my father told me, I assure you I will uphold my end of the bargain… I've observed that Sakura is using a ninja dog to track down Naruto. You must either side track her, or put the dog out of commission. If you succeed, I'll allow you to cross paths with Naruto."_

Ino narrowed her eyes. "There's still something you're not telling me… what's the catch?"

"_Of course there are some conditions to your meeting with him. We'll discuss the specifics of said conditions should you manage to succeed in your task. Bring me the items you purchased, and then go to Sakura, she's currently in the plaza."_

"Alright Hanabi, I'm gonna trust you… for now at least."

* * *

Sakura was walking down the street, holding a hilariously indifferent Pakkun in her arms. There was almost steam coming off her ample forhead, between Pakkun's smartass remarks, and his inability to get a bead on Naruto's scent, it seemed like she was shit out of luck.

"Ne, Sakura-chan? Why're ya lookin' for Naruto anyway? You never told me your reasons. You're not mad at him are you?"

Inwardly, Sakura wondered _why _Kakashi-sensei gave her Pakkun specifically. He had like… seven other dogs, all of them significantly less talkative.

In reality, Kakashi chose Pakkun because it would be funny to watch Sakura fumble around for a while, he and Yugao wanted a show after all. They hung back about four feet, just in case Sakura decided to start causing collateral damage out of sheer frustration.

Pakkun turned his head as far back as he could and prodded once more. "You still didn't answer my question."

Sakura's eye twitched. "Why's it matter Pakkun?"

"Meh, I just wanna know why you're dragging me around the town. It's _way_ past my bed time and it seems like ya got me out here for no reason at all. I might just go to sleep on ya if I don't know why I'm here."

Sakura tried to brush the pug off. "Just find him for me!"

The little dog snorted. "Why? What're you gonna give me in return huh?"

"I don't know! Doesn't Kakashi-sensei have treats for you or something?"

The dog narrowed his eyes and looked in Kakashi's direction. "_No_. Now tell me why we're looking for Naruto or I'll bite you."

Sakura sighed and her walking pace slowed a bit. "I just… wanna talk to him, our last conversation didn't end on a high note so our relationship is a bit strained at the moment."

Pakkun nodded. "Ah, lookin' to have a litter of your own are ya?"

Sakura sighed in exasperation, choosing to ignore his question.

Pakkun smirked and pointed one of his paws off to the left. "Alright, Naruto is… in _that_ general direction. I'll give ya more as we get closer."

* * *

Those who were searching for Naruto were having a reasonably smooth time of the night… Of course, this is relatively speaking. As mentioned before, Sakura didn't originally come to the festival on her own, she came with Tenten, Lee, Kiba, Shikamaru, and Chouji. Sakura was lucky she left when she did, because the group's night was rapidly taking a turn for the worse.

Kiba was the first to awaken, his head felt like it was splitting open… probably because the drunken Lee hit him over the head with a table.

Kiba, crass as ever, and now even more so with his splitting headache, decided to wake up the cause of their current situation. "Oi! Lee! Wake up you tard!"

Lee, who was lying exactly in the center of the completely trashed bar, sat up, like a vampire rising from the coffin.

Lee clutched his throbbing skull and looked around the room, visibly dazed. A wave of regret and abject horror washed over the very core of Lee's being. "Someone gave me sake, didn't they? ... I feel as if I have been head-butting a tree all day!"

Chouji struggled to stand up and shook his head; he then realized that a trickle of blood was running down the side of it."Well I feel like I head-butted the bottom of your foot with my forehead!"

Kiba stumbled around, visibly annoyed with his dizziness. "Lee, how'd you get sake?"

Chouji leaned back and cracked his spine. "Yeah, that was me… sorry. I didn't know you were _that _bad at holding your liquor. I mean, you only had one shot of the stuff!"

Kiba, still holding his aching head rushed over to Chouji and growled. "So this is your fault! Everybody knows not ta give Lee anything with alcohol in it dumbass!"

Chouji cracked his neck. "How was I supposed to know _ONE SHOT _could make him blackout drunk?!"

Kiba shoved Chouji a bit. "HOW DO YOU **NOT **KNOW THAT?!"

Just then, they heard the sound of a door opening in the back of the room. It was a tiny broom closet. Shikamaru was the one who stepped out, he took a disinterested look around the room sighed.

Shikamaru stared down at Lee as he walked over to the group. "So I take Lee's done trashing the place?"

Lee pouted. "I'm sorry! Chouji told me it was soda!"

The Nara heir groaned. "Chouji, really? What good could have come of that- … where're Tenten and Sakura?"

Kiba's eyes darted around the room. "Ah shit… well, Sakura left to find Naruto before we came in here, but Tenten? ... I know she was with us when everything went to hell."

The boys scoured the trashed bar, checking beneath knocked out patrons and flipped over tables. Failing to find her on the floor anywhere, they started to search the holes in the walls and the floorboards. It wasn't until they got to the last hole that they realized the gravity of their predicament.

This specific hole was behind the bar and on the floor. It was pitch black, which meant it was at least fifteen feet deep. Shikamaru frowned and cupped his ear with his hand; he could hear wind rushing through it.

Shikamaru spoke first. "Tunnels."

At that moment, Lee found one of Tenten's hair bands hanging from the destroyed ladder.

"Oh no! I must have knocked her down this hole!" Lee jumped in, about four seconds passed before the boys heard a loud thumping noise.

Chouji frowned. "That's loooong drop."

Shikamaru stood up and climbed over the bar.

Kiba poked his head over the bar. "Hey Shikamaru, where're you goin'?"

"Home." He started for the door, but through the damaged glass, he saw a squad of ANBU land outside, likely to book everybody in the bar for questioning. Shikamaru cut and ran back to the bar and jumped over it, flying through the hole in the floor.

Chouji stuck his head in the hole. "What made you change so quickly?"

A voice came from the darkness. "There's ANBU outside."

Kiba didn't even say a word, he snatched Chouji's wrist and jumped through the hole in the floor, dragging the Akimichi heir into the dark abyss with him.

Chouji wasn't one for heavy profanity, but this was a special occasion. "FUCKING BALLS! LET GO OF ME KIBA!"

A few minutes later, Shino Aburame awoke from his minor concussion. "What?" He looked around the room and picked up his shades, which were completely destroyed. He tossed them in the garbage and scoured the bar for his compatriots. He failed to find them amidst the injured patrons after scanning the room, and silently fumed.

"They forgot me again."

* * *

AN: Chapter 22 will be out soon, I'm planning on writing them back to back, so expect to see it up in about a week, give or take a few days.

Any sort of review you can think of is greatly appreciated. For those of you who take the time to review nearly every one of my chapters, I thank you especially.

Breath of the Wiz

~_Signin' Off_


	22. Chapter 22: Date Night Part II

AN:Sorry for the delay, but I had a case of writer's block. I hope you all have as much fun reading it as I did writing it. Here we go.

* * *

"Aw Forehead! You didn't tell me you had a puppy!" Ino had put on her best happy face to stall for Hanabi, who'd gone to a ninja supply store for some ammonia capsules in order to slow Pakkun's tracking abilities down.

"Ino, I'm busy. You're in the way."

Ino raised her eyebrow and peered behind Sakura, eyeing Kakashi and Yugao suspiciously. "Busy? Busy with what?"

Sakura stuck her tongue out at Ino. "None of your business."

Ino rolled her eyes. "Fine, I won't ask you about it anymore… but I _will _bother you with concerns to _this_."

Ino stopped and pulled a small coupon out of her cleavage, presenting it to Sakura. Sakura, completely unaware of Ino's intentions, stopped and read the coupon.

The pinkette perked up slightly. "Free ice-cream for the rest of the week?"

Ino smiled and nodded. "Yeah, I won it at a game-stand, sucker didn't know I was a ninja."

Sakura was jealous, but only slightly. "I'll get back to you on whether or not I wanna got get some tonight. I've gotta do this first."

Ino pouted. "Come on Forehead! I can't ask any guys 'cause I'm spoiled on Naruto, and well, there's only one other girl I know that likes ice-cream..."

Sakura brushed Ino off. "Why don't you ask her then?"

Ino made a strange expression. "That 'other girl' is Hanabi Hyuga… that'd get kinda weird."

Sakura, realizing that she'd stopped walking immediately looked at Pakkun, who was napping.

Sakura gave the pug a gentle shake. "Hey. Wake up."

Pakkun rolled his eyes and gave Sakura an exasperated look. "I was just waitin' for you to finish your little tea party with blondie over here… Keep walking this way."

Sakura frowned at Ino. "Piggy-chan, I've got something important to do, I'll get back to you if nothing pans out tonight."

Ino shrugged. "Alright Forehead, I'll go see if I can find someone else who wants to go." With that, Sakura turned and continued to follow Pakkun's directions.

Inwardly, Ino started formulating another plan to stall Sakura, but Hanabi's voice crackled in her earpiece before she could even start thinking.

"_Ino, give me your location. I have the ammonia capsules."_

"We're still in the plaza. Hurry though, I can't stall Sakura any more, she's _really _intent on finding Naruto."

"_Affirmative."_

* * *

After several minutes of walking, Pakkun suddenly went silent, ceasing all his assistance in giving Sakura directions.

Sakura looked at the pug in her hands. "Did you lose his scent?"

Pakkun sneezed. "Yeah, all I can smell is… Ammonia. Kakashi?"

Kakashi sped up and took Pakkun from Sakura. "What's up?"

"I think someone tossed an ammonia capsule around here somewhere. I'm starting to lose Naruto's scent."

Kakashi raised his eyebrow. "Looks like someone doesn't want you finding Naruto, Sakura-chan."

Kakashi gave Pakkun back to his student and sighed. "If that's the case this may take a while. Ammonia capsules are used specifically to counter ninken... Yugao-chan, how 'bout we cut our losses on Naruto?"

Yugao straightened her kimono and shrugged. "If you really think this'll be a waste of time, let's go do something else."

Kakashi turned back to Sakura. "Sakura-chan, you can keep searching if you feel like it. I'll see ya at home when you're done Pakkun."

Pakkun raised his paw waved Kakashi off. "Yeah, likewise… Alright pinky, we need to hurry up 'fore I get sick of this smell."

On a nearby roof, Hanabi raised her eyebrow and opened another case of ammonia capsules. "Challenge accepted."

* * *

Naruto and Hinata had agreed to go to Konoha Park when they realized how crowded the streets were that night. The Cherry Blossoms scattered throughout the area had paper lanterns hanging from them, and there were numerous couples peppered across the winding sidewalks and fountains.

They went to the lake and sat down on the edge of the water, right beneath a Cherry Blossom tree. Naruto grabbed Hinata's hand, locking his fingers with hers.

"Naruto-kun?"

Naruto absentmindedly stared at the dancing reflection of the moon on the water.

"Hm?"

Hinata kicked off her sandals and stuck her feet into the water. "H-How do you feel about your progress toward becoming Hokage?"

Naruto looked at her for a second and thought. "Well… I'm much closer than I was before I left, so that's something. I don't really know what else to say about it, it's not somethin' I can do quickly or overnight… What do you aspire to be Hinata?"

The wind picked up, and Hinata's serious expression jarred Naruto somewhat.

"I want to reform my clan's implementation of the main house and branch house system. It… disgusts me. I think it's wrong to steal someone's right to self-determination before they're even old enough to talk, I don't want any more of my people to grow up as Neji did. With everything that's happened, it makes me sad… to see the way my father looks at Neji, he's always had a guilty expression around my cousin."

Naruto smiled at Hinata and looked back out over the lake. "That's a noble goal, at least you got it all planned out, I think you'll make a great clan-head one day. Me on the other hand, heh, I have no idea what I'm gonna do when I finally get my hands on the robes and the hat…"

Hinata squeezed Naruto's hand and rested her head on his shoulder. "I think you'll be the greatest Hokage this village has ever seen, Naruto-kun."

Naruto squeezed her hand. "I hope so."

* * *

Meanwhile… several hundred feet beneath a destroyed bar, the majority of the Sasuke-Retreival team fumbled around in the darkness like idiots.

Chouji, who's voice was being drowned out by a yelling Lee, and a cursing Kiba, finally had enough of being ignored and made his valuable information known to the party.

The Akimichi heir took a deep breath and let loose a booming yell. "HEY, WOULD YOU CLODS STOP FOR ONE SECOND?!"

The group froze and turned to Chouji, who was fuming.

Lee jogged over to Chouji. "We need to find Tenten! Chouji, this should be of great importance!"

Chouji took a knee on the ground and reached into his hakama's pocket and pulled out a sheet of paper with a seal on it. He ran some chakra through the seal, and out popped an unexpected item.

Kiba started to laugh a bit. "Really Chouji?"

Lee frowned. "We don't have time for that!"

Shikamaru just shrugged and took a knee next to Chouji. "I think I know what you're getting at."

Chouji spoke up. "This is _Kaya_, my portable grill."

Kiba's eye twitched. "You're being serious right now, aren't you? CAN'T YOU WAIT UNTIL WE GET OUTTA HERE FATASS?!"

Chouji stood up and punched Kiba on the forehead, the Inuzuka dropped to the floor, clutching his face.. "WHO'RE YOU CALLIN' FATASS HUH?! … This isn't about food! We can use Kaya as a torch so we can move more quickly."

Lee grinned and gave Chouji a thumbs-up. "Brilliant Chouji! This will allow us to more easily locate Tenten in this darkness!"

Shikamaru dug in his ear. "Slow down Lee, we don't even know if-"

Lee was about to retort when his ears picked up the sound of approaching footsteps. One by one, the group began to notice the approaching noise and they immediately remembered that they were likely being pursued by ANBU.

Chouji lit Kaya and they all took off running, hoping to a higher power that they wouldn't have to spend the night in a jail cell.

* * *

Asuma Sarutobi kicked back and gave her his analysis of her situation. "Anko, you think too much."

The Snake Mistress blinked and stared down at her food. She too had gone to the festival in an attempt to clear her head, having sat down to dinner with Kurenai and Asuma.

Kurenai stuffed some rice into Asuma's mouth and chastised him. "You always say that. Why's all of your advice so vague?"

Asuma swallowed his food and gave Kurenai an impatient look. "I told Ino the same thing, and she took it to heart. She's head-over-heels for Naruto and she wastes her days plotting out contingency plans in case she runs into him. She's overthinking it."

The edge of Anko's mouth upturned slightly. "She's not the only one."

Asuma stared at Anko for a second, and his eyes nearly popped out of his head when he deduced what her tone of voice had implied.

Kurenai raised an eyebrow. "So it _was _Naruto you were talking about that day."

He scratched his beard and inquired. "Hey uh, Anko-san… Isn't Uzumaki a bit young for you?"

Anko pouted and rolled her eyes. "If I cared about that, we wouldn't be having this conversation... heheh, I wouldn't have snatched his virginity either."

Kurenai laughed and patted Asuma on the back while he choked on his rice. Finally managing to get the food down, he moved back to his previous point.

"So, you wanted to know if you like him, or the sex, right?"

Anko nodded and gestured for Asuma to continue.

Asuma flipped his lighter in the air and caught it between his fingers. "Have you tried _not _boning him when you meet up? That's how Kurenai got me to- ow!"

Kurenai had punched Asuma in the shoulder to cut him off. She turned to Anko and smirked. "He's right you know… _tactless_, but right. Slow down for a second and get to know him. Your relationship with Naruto lacks context right now. That's why you're having this debate with yourself."

Anko looked out the window and chuckled nostalgically. "Easier said than done. _He broke my bed in half_… I think our conversations'll tend to drift into the gutter while we negotiate a replacement."

Kurenai twitched a bit, trying to picture Naruto socially aware and sexually clued-up enough to unbalance _Anko_ of all people. She shook her head. "He's really that good? … I doubt that for some reason."

Anko shrugged. "Well, he's a natural. That's all there is to say about it… I'll take your advice though; I wanna know what he's about... Strange I've never asked him anything about himself yet."

Asuma laughed a bit and flicked some rice of Kurenai's face. "Kurenai you'd be surprised how knowledgeable teenage boys are with certain things. Hell, _Chouji_ put me up to a bunch of loopholes in Konoha's banking system, so it's not impossible that Naruto would know a few things."

Kurenai twirled her chopsticks between her fingers. "Yeah, right. I've seen how he is with Hinata, what could've possibly changed in such a short amount of time?"

* * *

At this point, the smell of ammonia was starting to become painfully apparent to the humans on the street, be they ninja or civilian. Sakura was starting to get worried, as she'd soon be at the point where she'd have to cover her nose. Pakkun was already well past that point however.

"Gah! It's all I can smell now!"

The pug's eyes were watering and his paws were lidded over his nose.

Sakura, who was now aware that her canine companion would no longer be of any assistance to her, put the dog down.

She sighed. "You can go home if your nose is hurting."

Pakkun gave Sakura one last bit of advice before he dispelled himself. "If someone was this determined ta throw a wrench in your search, I suggest you call it a night and find him later on."

With that, the pug disappeared in a plume of white smoke, and Sakura was left alone on the street. She patted down her frizzing hair and started walking in the opposite direction. Funny enough, she was only a few minutes away from Naruto and Hinata, and would have likely found them if she'd kept walking the way she had been going.

Hanabi, who had been watching from the balcony of somebody's apartment, pulled out some hand sanitizer to get the smell of ammonia off her hands. Pleased with her work, she called up Ino.

"_Now that the primary threat has been dealt with, I can take you to see Naruto."_

Ino, who was sitting on a bench in the plaza, perked up and pulled out a hand mirror.

She gave a devious smirk as she spoke into her communicator. "Great. I'm in the plaza, but before you take me to see Naruto, there's something I wanna to discuss with you. Meet me at the ice cream stand."

"_Alright then."_

* * *

Chouji hadn't run this much since the Sasuke retrieval mission, and that was an understatement. Lee was of course, out in front, being the fastest, with Kiba close behind. Shikamaru, as lazy as ever, was just a foot in front of Chouji, as he didn't want to outrun the light of Kaya, their savior.

They'd long since lost the ANBU following them, but the ANBU were second to none in their ability to track people. This is what kept the boys from stopping for longer than a few minutes at a time. This current sprint was triggered by the echoing sounds of footsteps that bounced through the cavern they were resting in. Lee, between the stress of having lost Tenten, and the fact that he couldn't stop and look for her when they took breaks due to the ANBU, it was safe to say his mind was elsewhere at the moment.

This was evident to the others when Lee began to pull ahead of the group further and further as their running went on.

Kiba realized this and yelled. "OI LEE! Do you know where you're going?"

Not caring, Lee didn't even look back to reply. "Nope!"

They darted left and right through the caverns, one time even making four consecutive right turns.

Kiba growled. "Get'cher head outta your ass! _We're following you!_"

Lee's head snapped up and he looked back. "My apologies Kiba! I'm trying to find Tente-"

Lee was cut off by a low reaching stalactite, the impact to his head caused him to backflip through the air like a ragdoll. Lee's sudden drop in speed caught Kiba off guard and they crashed into each other, tumbling to a stop.

Shikamaru rolled his eyes. "And that's why you don't outrun our torch man."

Shikamaru and Chouji jogged up to the heap of limbs and dirt on the ground. Lee and Kiba had completely ruined their kimonos; covered in dust and dirt, they were now tinted brown.

Kiba was the first to spring up. He rubbed the knot on his head and realized that they'd stumbled upon another cavern. Chouji picked the currently unconcious Lee up and slung him over his shoulder.

Shikamaru took the grill from Chouji and placed it in the center of the cavernous area, illuminating the majority of the room.

Shikamaru groaned. "Man, we're gonna be down here forever at this rate." He groaned and started pacing in a figure eight pattern.

Kiba, who was hoping that Shikamaru had an idea instead of an obvious statement, was disappointed. He opted to look at a conspicuous secion of dirt on the otherwise stone walls of the cavern.

Kiba delivered a solid kick to the dirt patch and a deep thump echoed through the catacombs. Shikamaru and Chouji swiveled their heads to the origin of the sound. The dirt crackled and crumbled off of the wall, revealing a boarded up opening. Kiba raised his eyebrow and moved to swat one of the boards off of the opening.

Shikamaru tried to warn him in vain. "Hey Kiba, I don't think you should-"

The board clattered to the ground and Chouji froze. His gut was telling him something bad was about to happen, and he was right, right beyond comprehension. Kiba's heart sunk in disgust as an army of mice erupted from the gap in the wood, skittering around his feet. That was only the beginning, more and more wodden planks fell from the wall, until a literal wave of rodents swallowed Kiba.

There was a muffled scream, and a silence. Shikamaru and Chouji stared in surprise, or revulsion, or… really there was no word to describe their feelings at the moment. Suddenly there was a gust of wind in the tunnels, sending the vermin flying in all directions. The incessant squeaking of the mice was accompanied by Kiba's roaring voice.

"_DISGUSTING! GOD DAMMIT! LITTLE BASTARDS!"_

Kiba came spinning out of the pile, his form bouncing around the walls of the cavern.

Shikamaru's eyes widened. "Kiba! Knock it off! Your **_Gatsuga_**'s causing a ca-"

Pebbles and other small chunks of rock began to fall from the ceiling, each impact making Shikamaru's eyes bulge even more. He groaned and finished his sentence.

"… cave-in."

Kiba, having finally gotten all the mice off of himself landed in front of Shikamaru, who was picking Kaya off the ground. Kiba was about to ask what was up until some rumbling cut him off. He looked up and rocks the size of horses were starting to smash into the ground, Kiba gave the group a sheepish shrug and they all sprinted for the nearest exit.

Chouji had a close call with a large boulder just as they were exiting the doomed cavern, and the shockwave from the impact was enough to toss him into the air. He landed on his feet, but Lee wasn't treated so kindly by gravity. Chouji, having switched to piggy-backing Lee, didn't account for the unlikely event in which he'd have to jump away from something.

Chouji's jump had caused Lee's upper body to drag on the ground and comically bounce about like dice on a hard floor. Chouji wanted to laugh, but he had more important things to worry about at the moment, especially the possibility that Tenten may now be trapped somewhere in the passageways due to the cave-in.

By the time they'd outran the collapsing cave, the boys reached another open area, however, this one was much smaller than the previous caverns they'd been in. They all collapsed in exhaustion, having been running near constantly for the past few hours.

Shikamaru, in a moment of clarity snapped up and looked at Kiba. "Oi Kiba, did you ever catch Tenten's scent when we came down here?"

Kiba paused and a look of disappointment washed over his canine features. "… No… in restrospect, I lost her scent as soon as we came down here."

Shikamaru scowled for a second, but then he sighed in defeat and laid back down. "So there's about an 80% chance that we're down here for no reason… I must be getting rusty if I didn't deduce that beforehand... _mataku, _I guess needed the exercise anyway."

Shikamaru took their pointless adventure in stride, but Chouji on the other hand was furious, furious enough to toss Lee at Kiba.

Steam was coming out of the Akamichi's ears. "You coulda told us that as soon as we got down here! It would've been easier to just hide from the ANBU until they left, but noooooo... MAN I COULD BE AT KITANO'S BARBECUE RIGHT NOW! ON TOP OF THAT, THIS DUMBASS ADVENTURE TRASHED KAYA!"

Kiba tossed the unconscious Lee back at Chouji. "It's just a stupid mini-grill! They're dirt cheap anyway!"

Chouji tossed Lee back at Kiba, his ragdolling limbs clocked the young Inuzuka in the head. Chouji spat back.

"Kaya was custom built! Chakra powered burners, stainless steel finish, THE AKIMICHI CREST ENGRAVED ABOVE MY NAME! Kaya was a work of art!"

Shikamaru, currently lounging on the ground took a look at the dented and battered mini-grill. It still worked of course, these grills were made for ninja to use during extended missions, but the damages this thing had suffered seriously depreciated the grill's value.

He turned the burner to a lower setting so they didn't asphyxiate and started thinking about how they'd get out.

Kiba sighed and poked Shikamaru's shouleder with his foot. "Hey, Shikamaru. Got any bright ideas?"

The Nara picked up an albino cave beetle and observed it while he spoke. "I'm calculating our current location in Konoha by taking into consideration the distance we've run, along with the turns and inclined passages that we've gone through."

Chouji and Kiba just stared blankly at Shikamaru, who appeared to be observing the beetle and doing a complex logical problem in his head at the same time. They were used to his level of intelligence, but anyone else would be amazed at how quickly he was making progress on such a complex problem.

Doodling in the dirt, Shikamaru began deducing their location. 'We've made ten rights and twelve lefts, we've run a total of approximately sixteen kilometers, and eight of the sloped tunnels we went through were inclined at thirty or so degrees…'

After about a minute, Shikamaru had an answer for the group.

"I've got a total of three possible locations we could pop out of if we go straight up from here. One of them will probably get us into serious trouble, another will probably kill us, and well, let's just hope it's the last one."

Kiba sat up and inquired to their resident genius. "It's either that or wander around until we die down here. Whaddaya have in mind Nara?"

* * *

Ino was sitting at a table with Hanabi inside the ice cream bar. The glee with which the little girl was eating made it quite obvious that ice cream was her favorite food.

She raised her eyebrow at the little girl. "Really, I never would have pegged you for an ice cream person when we first met."

Hanabi wiped the chocolate from her mouth nodded. "Yes, it happens to be my favorite confection. Thank you for treating me... what was it you wanted to talk about?"

Ino smirked. "So, what has you running defense for Naruto tonight? Knowing you, you'd have to benefit from this in some way."

Hanabi stared back blankly. "I agreed to help Naruto in exchange for... ice cream on demand."

The blonde narrowed her eyes. "There's something you're not telling me."

Hanabi nodded. "Yes there is, and it is not information that I plan to divulge to you." The younger of the girls rested her elbows on the table, as if expecting something.

Ino shook her head. "I'm not giving you this bag of stuff you wanted unless you tell me what you get from Naruto over this. It's hard enough _not _knowing what you want with these rings and bricks and stuff."

Hanabi dug in to her sixth bowl of ice cream and answered Ino. "If you really must know, he has agreed to take me out at my beck and call in exchange for my protection tonight and a favor only I can grant him."

Ino was about to ask why, but Sakura happened to enter the restaurant, she gave Hanabi a strange look as she sat down next to Ino.

The blonde motioned for Hanabi to stop talking about Naruto with a conspicuous flip of her hair, paired with a narrowed eye. The Hyuga subtly nodded and stared at Sakura.

"So Forehead... didja have any luck finding Naruto?"

The pinkette, looking down on herself, shook her head. "No, I didn't. I just feel so nervous, we had an awkward moment a couple of days ago and I wanna set the record straight."

Ino slid Sakura one of Hanabi's bowls of ice cream, much to the little girl's annoyance.

In jest, the blonde girl took a jab at Sakura's inability to recognize her own feelings. "Set the record straight? It's really pretty simple Forehead, you want him to break you in and wear you out. No shame in that… Or is he still your '_friend'_?"

The sarcastic spin on _"friend" _made Sakura roll her eyes. She silently dug into her ice cream, while Hanabi continued to stare at her. After a few seconds, Sakura turned to the little girl and eyed her suspiciously.

"What is it?"

Hanabi deadpanned. "You too desire to have sexual intercourse with Uzumaki-san. I welcome your competition as it will keep me in top form, however, _**I**_ shall be victorious in the end."

Sakura turned the same color as her hair and increased the pace at which she stuffed ice cream into her mouth; perhaps the brain freeze would cool her head down. On the other side of the restaurant, the owner stared in disbelief as the girls inhaled his stock of ice cream.

Really, it was Hanabi who was eating everything, Ino and Sakura had only wanted one bowl each, but even then. it was still amazing. Never had anyone seen teenage girls eat so much food in one sitting. The table was littered with empty bowls, and full bowls just waiting to be consumed.

It was here that Ino signaled Hanabi that she was ready to leave, so they made some sort of lame excuse about having to take Hanabi home, even though it was pretty obvious that she could handle herself.

Sakura was a bit too depressed to make logical deductions at the moment, so she ordered another bowl of ice cream. It took about thirty seconds for her to consider the possibility that Ino was working with Hanabi that night to sabotage any attempt to find Naruto. It made perfect sense, especially since Piggy-chan had _**never **_mentioned anything concerning a close relationship with one of the Hyuga Heiresses... She immedieately left the ice cream bar, and tailed Hanabi and Ino to the park.

* * *

Tenten was not having a good night. During the incident in the bar, she was knocked out when she tried to restrain Lee, a bad idea overall. Lee had grown quite a bit in the past 2 years, and he was nearly twice her size at this point. Tenten mentally reminded herself to stab whoever fed her that _"girl power"_ bullshit when she was little, attempting to grapple with Lee of all people is already ill advised, but on top of that, Tenten was _at best_ a buck twenty _soaking wet_, and there she was thinking she could take the beast on in a contest of brute strength. Lee had unintentionally elbowed her in the side of the head, and then he fell backwards on top of her.

She was knocked out first, and so, she woke up first, of course with a splitting headache. Opting to avoid '_hanging with the boys_' for the night, she left the destroyed establishment the minute she woke up. Tenten made a beeline for the nearest pharmacy, in search of aspirin and an ice pack. Having gotten what she was looking for, she decided to take a relaxing walk through the park to wait for the pills to kick in, hoping to herself that she didn't have a concussion.

This was a decision that she wouldn't regret that night, in more ways than one.

* * *

Ino and Hanabi walked through the gate of Konoha park, the older of the two girls became slightly confused, so she started asking some important questions.

"Hanabi, you said that you had some special terms for talking to Naruto tonight, what are they?"

Hanabi used henge to transform her ninja clothes into her daydreamed black and silver kimono.

The young Hyuga smirked as her plan began to come to fruition. "I refrained from telling you all the details because I knew you would hesitate to go through with my requests otherwise."

Ino looked around the park and wondered why Naruto would come here tonight, but then it dawned on her, Hanabi only vocalized what Ino was thinking.

The little girl had just masterminded Ino's entire night without her knowing, the blonde face-palmed while Hanabi revealed her hand for the night.

"Uzumaki-san is courting my sister at this moment in time. If you wish to speak with him, you cannot make any disruptive comments or take any disruptive actions."

Hanabi took Ino by the fingers and put on a childish expression, the innocent look on her face created dissonance with the words coming out of her mouth..

"If you attempt to ruin Uzumaki-san's night, _I shall break your fingers... _Follow me." Hanabi validated her threat by giving Ino's hand a firm squeeze.

Ino, who was completely distraught at how she'd been railroaded all night, was further beaten down when she realized that she couldn't speak freely even if she _was_ able to talk to Naruto. On top of that, he was on a date with Hinata, a girl who Ino could accept losing to as far as Naruto was concerned.

Ino stopped walking with Hanabi and sat down on a bench, the little girl mirrored her and sat down too.

Ino Yamanaka was disgusted with herself. "How could I fall for such an obvious trap? You knew how I'd react, as soon as you saw me. You even knew I wouldn't crash Naruto's date just to talk with him!"

She smiled a bit in defeat. "You little girl, are an evil genius."

Hanabi turned up her nose. "Evil? Perhaps, however that is subject to perspective. Genius? Yes, that can be measured, and I fulfill the criteria… Thank you for your assistance Yamanaka-san, it was greatly appreciated. My apologies for the deception, but this is a high-stakes competition."

Ino smirked at Hanabi and pinched her on the cheek. "_Touché _little girl. You got me this time, but next time, I'll be holding all the cards. You've earned this little victory of yours."

Hanabi squirmed out of Ino's pinch. "I can still take you to see Uzumaki-san if you so desire."

Ino paused a second. "Yeah, you do that, but I don't think I should talk to him. I just wanna spy on his date now."

Hanabi looked at Ino and nodded. She reached into her Kimono, and whipped out a pair of handcuffs. Before Ino could react, Hanabi had locked her wrist and Ino's together.

"This is only a security precaution, please bear with it, if only for the sake of Uzumaki-san. He's this way."

Ino, was less surprised at the action, and more at the fact that she owned this specific brand of cuffs. They weren't ninja cuffs, no, they were leather ones, of the BDSM variety.

Ino's eye twitched and she nervously inquired to the preteen. "So… Hanabi-chan. Where'd you get those?"

Hanabi, as deadpan as ever answered Ino. "I purchased them from an interesting store in Konoha's old quarter. There were a large quantity of strange leather-masks and other restraints. Wholly impractical for ninja use, but these cuffs are easily concealable, being made primarily of leather."

Ino laughed a bit. "...That wasn't a ninja supply store you went into."

Hanabi gave Ino a strange look. "In retrospect, it likely was not, the store owner was extremely confused by my presence. Even so, I purchased several other items from the establishment... Primarily for Uzumaki-san to use them with me."

Ino's eye twitched in raw… whatever the emotion was, it doesn't have a name at this point in time. Hanabi took Ino's silence as a sign to continue her explanation.

"The Idea dawned on me following my observations of Uzumaki-san and Mitarashi-san."

Ino snapped out of her stupor, immediately angry. "Who now?"

"Anko Mitarashi. She had sexual intercourse with Uzumaki-san recently and she used some similar bindings on him that night. From what I have observed, he is sufficiently experienced, which lessens my concerns. When I convince him to deflower me, the chances of me being injured in some capacity will be much lower than I originally anticipated."

Ino's eyes widened and she stood up from the bench. "Take me to see him."

Ino had some difficulty comprehending Naruto of all people being sexually active, but it _was_ Anko Mitarashi that was interested in him, so that itself spoke volumes. However, if Naruto tried anything sleazy with Hinata, Ino would have to rip him a new one.

Hanabi took Ino to a large hedge overlooking the lake and the tree Naruto and Hinata were sitting beneath. They were currently having a heartfelt conversation concerning their dreams for the future. Ino felt jealous of Hinata, who's love for Naruto was so incorruptibly pure, that there was no way that he couldn't fall for her.

It was here that Sakura appeared behind the hedge with Hanabi and Ino.

The venom in her voice was palpable. "_Ino_… You knew where Naruto was this whole time, didn't you?"

Ino and Hanabi, who were wholly unconcerned with Sakura at the moment shushed her.

Sakura was red with anger instead of embarrassment. "What was that? DON'T SHUSH M-!"

Sakura was cut off when Hanabi whipped out a leather ball-gag and stuffed it into Sakura's mouth, deftly locking the straps in place in a single movment.

Sakura's eyes nearly popped out of her head when she realized what was in her mouth, Ino just stared, unsurprised at this point.

Hanabi, cool as a cucumber, spoke to Sakura in a soft voice. "They are likely to hear you if you speak at that volume. I'll take the pacifier out of your mouth if you agree to be quiet."

Ino face-faulted and popped back up immediately, she gave Hanabi an energetic whisper. _"That's not a pacifier!"_

Hanabi removed the ball-gag from Sakura's mouth, who had fainted (again).

Hanabi's big innocent eyes made Ino want to pinch her cheeks again. "What else could this device be used for other than to impede the ability to talk? It must be a pacifier."

Ino chuckled and shrugged. "Know what? You have the right idea, forget I said anything."

It was here that Hanabi nodded and looked at Sakura, who was still passed out, she took some of the ninja wire Ino bought her and tied Sakura's ankle to a large oak tree behind the hedge.

Sakura woke up again after a few seconds. "I really need to stop doing that." She crawled forward and plopped down next to Hanabi and Ino, who were also prone behind the hedge. As Sakura watched Naruto and Hinata have such genuine and heartfelt exchanges of words, Sakura began to wish that she could talk to Naruto that way. There always seemed to be some kind of barrier between them, which only became more obvious since they'd returned.

She thought that she would be able to just walk over and speak her mind to Naruto, but looking at how happy he was with Hinata made her body refuse to move past the hedge.

'Aw I can't mess this up for him! He's having such a nice night!'

'**Well what the hell did you think would happen? You're too soft for that sorta thing!'**

Sakura was jarred from her thoughts when another person plopped down next to the group of voyeurs, it was Tenten. Hanabi undid her handcuffs, sighed, and discreetly tied Tenten's and Ino's ankles to the oak tree.

"Who're you guys spying on?"

Ino answered. "Naruto."

Tenten looked surprised. "I didn't know Naruto was back."

Sakura enlightened her. "He's been pretty busy lately."

Tenten looked through the leaves and spotted Naruto, in all his half-nakedness and whatnot. She oogled his muscles and was thrown for a loop and how hard Naruto had been hit with the puberty stick.

Tenten grinned. "Wow… he's… _gorgeous_... Sakura you lucky b-"

"Don't finish that sentence Tenten."

Tenten's risqué fantasies concerning Naruto ended when her favorite person landed next to the group.

"Hanabi-sama, why are? … Nevermind." Neji crouched down next to Tenten, who was giddy at the thought of seeing him that night.

"_Hi, Neji-kun."_

Neji stared at Tenten and examined the bruise on her head. With a protective air to his voice, he questioned her. "Tenten, did someone attack you?"

Her eyes snapped open a bit and shook her head. "Well… not intentionally, it's okay really. No need to worry about me… heheh." She blushed and tried to slide closer to Neji. "Can I rest my head on your back? It hurts."

Neji paused for a second went down on his stomach. "I suppose. If you're in pain I should make an effort to accommodate you."

She smirked and continued eavesdropping on Naruto's date with everyone else.

Naruto was having an incredible time with Hinata that night, hell, when he kissed her, she only fainted for a few minutes. That was a personal best for Hinata as far as Naruto could remember; she used to go out for hours at a time.

Naruto was about to pull Hinata into his lap when Hanabi appeared in front of them.

Hinata was the first to notice. "Hanabi-chan? Is something wrong?"

Hanabi nodded. "It has become much to arduous to maintain the secrecy of your courtship with Uzumaki-san. It is likely that your night will be interfered with within the next few minutes."

Hinata sighed and looked up at Naruto. "I've had an incredible night Naruto-kun. If it were to end now, I could consider it a priceless memory of you… I'd rather it not be ruined by any sort of sabotage."

Naruto put some thought into it and agreed with his date. "Yeah, I guess it was bound to happen anyways…" Naruto gave Hanabi a genuine smile for the first time since he'd returned. "Thanks for all your help Hanabi-chan. Without you, this would've been the worst night of our lives." Naruto patted the young girl on the top of her head.

Hanabi's mouth curled into a tiny smile and she got a rosy tint in her cheeks, in the vein of her older sister.

"_Uzumaki-san_..."

Naruto scratched his head and laughed a bit, but the moment was interrupted by a vibrating fealing around his crotch.

'…Well that's new... What the hell cou-'

His train of thought was cut off when a disembodied head popped out of the ground right between Naruto's thighs.

Naruto was used to gore, so this part didn't bother him much surprisingly. However, when he realized that it was Kiba's head sticking out of the ground, Naruto and Hinata did what any sensible person would do.

Naruto and Hinata screamed. "AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

It was here that Kiba realized that his face was jammed into naruto's crotch.

Kiba screamed. "AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"

Hanabi stared. "… Perhaps I should decrease my daily caloric intake of ice cream."

Sakura, snapped back to reality by the sound of Naruto's scream had a PTSD flashback of their battle with Orochimaru in the Forest of Death. She immedieatly sprinted through the hedge to help him… completely uprooting the oak tree, dragging it _and_ the rest of the group behind her, all except Neji, who stared awkwardly as he was completely exposed in his now absent hiding spot.

The rest of the boys popped out of Kiba's hole in the ground, and for the first time in two and a half years, the Rookie 11 were all gathered in the same place… Well, minus Shino of course, but no one noticed until after the fact.

~FIN ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

* * *

Thanks for reading. Don't forget to fave, follow, and review. Any of these three things that you do are greatly appreciated. Next time, the Rookie 11 (minus Shino...) campout, and also, Gaara-chan has to have a little chat with Naruto.

_Breath of the Wiz_

_~Signin' off_


	23. Chapter 23: Our Souls Break the Chains

AN: I decided to cut the campout short so we can move toward the Suna Arc more quickly. I thought about doing an omake with it instead, but now, I just think I'll have a Rookie 11 function when Naruto gets back from his eventual mission. With that said, let's get into it. Things are going to get a bit more serious for a while, but after all this blows over, I'll switch back to more shenanigans for Naruto's next "vacation".

* * *

Naruto was confused to say the least; here he was, with the rookie eleven (plus Hanabi, minus Shino…) in its entirety, on a night that was supposed to be between himself and Hinata. They were all sitting around "Kaya", Chouji's grill. He'd turned the burner to max power so that they could at least have some chance at drying off.

The reason they were all soaking wet, save for Neji, was due primarily to an uprooted Oak tree, and a pink haired medic, who was still apologizing profusely to the group. Sakura, still adjusting to her recently obtained strength, had forgotten that there was a tree attached to her ankle when she instinctively rushed over to "save" Naruto.

Sakura stopped running when she realized Naruto was fine, but inertia is a cruel mistress. The large tree continued sliding along the grass and swatted the entire group into the lake, ruining their clothing... Well, not all of them. The boys who had gone spelunking in the catacombs beneath the village were rather thankful for the unexpected bath, seeing as they were covered in grime when they surfaced.

Several drenched ninja later, Naruto grinned and examined his current situation with intrigue.

Hanabi was shivering as she clung to his right arm, with Hinata doing the same on his left. Naruto never really felt the cold after Ero-Sannin loosened his seal, apparently his average body temperature hovered around 105 Fahrenheit (40 Celsius for those who follow the metric system), essentially turning him into a walking space heater.

It had been nearly five minutes of silence before Naruto spoke.

"Is anyone gonna say anything? I finally see all of you in one place and it's dead quiet!"

Kiba, in a dog-like manner, shook some water off of his head and looked in Naruto's direction. "Oi Naruto, I never did get into the specifics with you concernin' yer trip. You got to see the world with one of the Sannin, any crazy stories?"

Sakura looked at Kiba in surprise and turned her attention to Naruto, they talked about his trip when he'd brought her home that one night, but in retrospect, he was vague in his answers and continually tricked her into talking about herself instead.

Naruto thought back, he couldn't tell them about the year-long battle for control of his body, so he opted for his most memorable escapade with his master.

Naruto chuckled and gave them the set up for his most memorable encounter.

"See, about six months into the trip, me and Ero-Sannin-"

Kiba piped in. "The Hell's 'Ero-Sannin'?"

Naruto rolled his eyes and continued. "… I call him that 'cause he's a pervert dog-boy, now lemme finish… Anyway, we were passing through Demon Country when he decided to start training me in my elemental affinity. Mine's wind, so of course, things got a little chaotic. I accidentally blew myself up with one of my attacks and got launched about a hundred meters. You'd never guess where I landed either."

Shikamaru scooted closer to Kaya and propped his elbows on his knees, trying to catch more of the heat. "In the arms of a beautiful woman?"

Naruto paused and stared at his friend. "Wha- How did y-?"

Shikamaru shrugged. "Women tend to gravitate toward you…" Shikamaru thought about Anko's sudden change in demeanor when Naruto was around, and then looked at Hanabi. "regardless of age apparently."

Ino nodded and wearily stared at the young Hyuga. "Yes… very much so."

Naruto rolled his eyes and continued on. "I _completely_ wrecked a passing norimono. Crashed right through the side and landed in some girl's cleavage! She totally freaked and kicked me in the head! I would've been in some serious trouble if Ero-Sannin wasn't there, apparently she was really important or something… Can't quite remember her name, but she was just horrible to be around, stereotypical princess doesn't do her justice. I straight up told her I'd be perfectly content if we never met again, and then, she said the last thing I'd expect."

Naruto scratched his head. "According to her_, "unfortunately, our fates are intertwined from this point onward, I dread seeing you again"_, then she slapped me in the face and rode of on one of her servant's backs! … Very easily the weirdest day of my life… topped only by tonight."

Shikamaru smirked. "With your luck, you're guaranteed to cross paths with her again at some point."

Naruto shuddered. "I hope n-... uh, Hanabi-chan?"

Naruto hadn't noticed until just then, but Hanabi had wrapped Naruto's arm around herself and was now clinging to his torso.

She spoke in her usual dead pan. "The wind is unusually strong for a summer night... Your abnormally high body temperature will prevent my contraction of any ilness."

Hinata peered across Naruto's torso. "Hanabi-chan, I can take you home if you wish."

Neji raised his head and spoke. "That will not be necessary Hinata-sama, I shall escort Hanabi-sama home if need be."

The little girl shook her head. "I wish to stay with Uzumaki-san, I must protect him from all of you." She looked around the circle at all of the girls, even her sister.

Neji grabbed the bridge of his nose. "Right, right, your claim…"

Kiba opened his mouth once more, tactless as ever. "So what, you robbin' cradles now Naruto?"

Hanabi glared at Kiba. "Inuzuka-san, I may only be nine years of age at the moment, but I am currently training for the next chuunin exams. I am by no means, a child, regardless of your preconceptions."

Kiba raised his eyebrow at the little girl. "I take it back… Naruto, make sure she doesn't trick you into marrying her or something, she seems kinda shifty."

Hanabi squirmed closer to Naruto, who eyed the young girl suspiciously.

'Hm, he's right. She probably has something else up her sleeve too; 'specially since she's already suckered me into this ice cream date thing.'

'**Wow, you're actually thinking ahead… Would you consider making a habit of it?'**

'I thought you were asleep.'

'**I was, until your incessant screaming woke me up… Soooo… when are you going to corrupt the little female? She's proven quite useful lately... and she **_**is **_**looking to be rewarded for her efforts.'**

'We've already been over this, stop being an ass. I'll just follow through with the ice-cream or something instead like we agreed.'

'**I seriously can't even comprehend what the issue is here. The fuck's wrong with it?'**

'You don't function on our "_foolish human conventions_", remember? You wouldn't understand.'

'**No, really. She's just going to be mated with one of you vermin eventually, why does the timing matter?'**

'Just go back to sleep, you're being weird.'

'"_**Weird"**_** is subjective to perspective.'**

'Shut up.'

Naruto shook himself from his mental exchange and looked to Kiba. "Ah, I'm sure she'll grow out of it."

Hanabi looked up at Naruto. "I am aware that you don't really believe the words you are saying."

Naruto sighed and the group began to chuckle at the little girl's antics. Sakura jealously eyed the little girl, but then her attention turned to Lee, who was once again knocked out by the tree.

The resident medic crawled over to the green clad ninja and snapped over his face, to no avail. She peeled open his eyes and took a look at his pupils, but overall, nothing was out of order.

"He's looks okay, but… I should still test him for a concussion when he wakes up. Chouji-san? Can you prop him up on…" Sakura sighed and pointed to the oak tree's trunk sticking out of the lake.

Chouji, still soaking wet shivered and nodded. "Yeah, sure." He walked over and placed Lee down, cringing at the multitude of knots on his head, mainly due to the fact that he was partially the cause of many of said bruises and bumps.

Sakura's eyes went back to her teammate and she absentmindedly stared at him, becoming oblivious to her surroundings.

'I have to talk to him… but this isn't something I can just blurt out in front of everyone.'

Her thoughts were interrupted by Naruto's voice. "Ne, Sakura-chan? Why're you looking at me like that?"

Sakura lied. "... I was trying to find you all night, and when I finally figure out where you are, you happen to be on a date… sorry for messing everything up."

**_'SHANNARO! Just say it so we can fuck'im!'_**

_'Quiet you.'_

Hinata spoke up on Naruto's behalf. "There's no need to worry Sakura. I was actually half expecting the night to end in disaster, this is a much more pleasant outcome than I originally anticipated."

Sakura exhaled in relief and returned to thinking about how she would have her talk with Naruto, she couldn't visit him at his house because Mitsuki was there, and she didn't need to know about all this.

Ino gave Sakura a knowing look and poked her in the side of the head, the blonde teased Sakura. "Now's as good a time as any Forehead…"

Sakura looked at her friend and rolled her eyes, poking Ino back. "Oh shut it." Sakura looked back to the group and addressed everyone.

"I'm going to take Lee to the hospital and then head home. If anyone is injured in some way, you'd best come with me." Sakura walked over to Lee and slung him over her shoulder, immediately walking off toward her destination.

Everyone except Hanabi, Hinata, Neji … and Chouji, went with Sakura to get checked out, this left them staring at each other. Chouji looked around and turned Kaya's burner off.

"Sorry guys, I gotta go get Kaya repaired, you all have a nice night." Chouji gingerly picked up the grill and walked off in the opposite direction that Sakura and the rest of the group went.

Neji took this as his cue. "Hanabi-sama, please, allow me to escort you home." The girl stared back at her cousin and shook her head, she looked up and Naruto and pouted.

Naruto's eyes bounced between Neji and Hanabi, he paused and thought for a few seconds, he was cut off by Hinata.

"Hanabi-chan. Naruto seems a bit tired, perhaps we should let him rest for the night?"

Hanabi reluctantly let go of Naruto and picked up her bag of miscellaneous items, she stared back at him as she was ushered away by her big sister and cousin, a tiny smirk on her face.

Naruto narrowed his eyes in suspicion. 'She just eliminated all of her competition for the night…'

_**'Rather pragmatic if you ask me.'**_

_'Yeah? ... Well no one did.'_

Naruto looked around, slightly bewildered and decided to head home for the night.

As he walked toward the path beneath the Cherry Blossoms, he noticed a disembodied foot in a fir tree. Naruto grinned and walked up the trunk, he recognized the distinctive ninja-sandals the second he saw them.

Sitting there, half asleep and smirking at him was Mitsuki, she'd been keeping an eye on him all night.

Mitsuki yawned and stretched. "I see your date went well Namikaze-sama."

Naruto grinned. "So you were looking out for me too?"

She picked some bristle leaves out of her clothes and nodded. "Yes… but it's not me you should be thanking. That little Hyuga girl's really taken a shine to you, did you remember to thank her?"

Naruto gave his bodyguard a thumbs-up. "Of course! I always pay my debts!"

Mitsuki laughed and cracked her neck. "Good, good. I'm glad this night didn't go to waste, you're a handful, you know that right? I'm liable to pass out from lack of sleep one of these days."

Naruto deftly snatched Mitsuki up into his arms and walked down the tree. "Consider this thanks for all that you've done for me Mitsuki-chan."

As they walked beneath the trail of Cherry Blossoms, they looked at the petals in silence. Everything was perfectly illuminated by the paper lanterns and framed by the starry night sky. Mitsuki broke the silence with a pinch to Naruto's cheek and a joking tone of voice.

"Your date… it went well. I guess this means you can do things to me without my permission now."

Naruto nearly tripped as Mitsuki's little tutoring session came back to him. Naruto turned a shade of pink and chuckled. "Heheh. What'd you have in mind?"

Mitsuki closed her eyes. "I'll show you when I'm not feeling so drained… you really are… a handful." She slowly drifted off to sleep as Naruto walked through the front gate of the Uzumaki estate. Naruto got a few intrigued looks from his staff as he walked through the front door that morning; they likely found it interesting that the head of the house and his staffer were arriving home together at such a late hour of the night. They paid it no mind however, as Naruto's butlers and maids were all ninja. They'd all likely seen much stranger things in their lifetimes anyway.

Naruto took Mitsuki up to her room and placed her on her bed, before he left the room, something caught his eye. It was a picture of herself, Kakashi-sensei, a familiar looking woman with purple hair, and several other ninja he didn't recognize. It was likely a picture of Kakashi's ANBU team before his retirement from that line of work, Naruto made a mental note to ask Mitsuki how exactly she ended up serving him.

Naruto flipped the light switch and wend down to his own room. He took a short shower and changed into a pair of orange shorts and a sleeveless black shirt. Plopping himself down on the bed, he grabbed his remote and retracted the T.V. from the floor.

This was a common occurrence for Naruto over the years. He'd go to sleep watching T.V. in hopes that his dreams would be about whatever he was watching, as opposed to dreams of Haku.

The past few days had been a whirlwind of emotion for Naruto, and for a short time he'd managed to forget about her, but his dream that night caused some old wounds to reopen… if one could even call it a dream. No… it was more in line with a memory.

* * *

_The Great Naruto Bridge 3 years prior_

_Naruto stared down at Haku's lifeless body, her blood pooled beneath her. Despite the horrid appearance of her Chidori wound, she still had the same smile on her face, the one she'd given him before she died._

_Kakashi put his hand on Naruto's shoulder. "Naruto, I'm sorry, she jumped in front of my attack. It was far too late for me to-"_

_Naruto tried to keep it together as he looked at the corpses of Haku and Zabuza. "You-you're not to blame, Kakashi-sensei, you were just protecting us. Besides, I'm a shinobi now. This is to be expected… but what kind of Hokage can't save one person?"_

_Kakashi took a knee and straightened Naruto's headband. "I know how important to you she was, but you have to understand, some of us aren't destined for happy endings. If you want to become Hokage, then this is the most important lesson you'll ever learn… __**You can't save everyone**__, as some..." Kakashi looked down at Zabuza and Haku, having familiar thoughts concerning Obito. "Some of us are beyond saving, as fortune may dictate that we make sacrifices in order to move forward… Naruto, there was only one other outcome for this battle, and that was for Team 7 to be wiped out, you did what you had to."_

_Naruto hung his head. "I… don't feel so good."_

_Sakura, who was watching the whole thing, came over and took Naruto by the hand. "Naruto… thank you for saving Sasuke-kun. I... I know I've said some mean things to you, but if you weren't here… we'd __**all**__ be dead."_

_She looked down at Haku, who despite the all blood, looked beautiful, as if she were sleeping. "This whole mission must have been difficult for you… What was her name?"_

_Naruto squeezed Sakura's hand lightly. "Haku… her name was Haku."_

* * *

Naruto's eyes snapped open, the euphoria of the past few days was finally wearing off, that day on the bridge had been haunting him ever since. Naruto rolled over and looked at the clock, it was 8:30. He untangled his crystal necklace and put on some ninja sandals. He had to go practice with the Hiraishin.

On his way down the Cherry Blossom trail, he came upon a familiar face.

"Gaara-chan?"

She fiddled with her belt tassel and closed the distance to him, a minute tinge of pink adorning her pale features.

"Naruto… I have to leave for Suna in an hour. I wanted to see you one more time before I-" Gaara stared at Naruto and cocked her head to the side.

"You seem preoccupied with something."

Naruto put his hands up. "It's fine, I just had a bad dream last night, that's all."

Gaara slowly walked over to him and gave him a somewhat wooden hug, Naruto hugged her back and took her by the hand.

"Walk with me Gaara-chan." She took Naruto's hand and upturned her lips slightly.

She offered Naruto a piece of advice. "I sleep a lot more now… When I have bad dreams, I talk to my sister about them. Naruto, do you have anyone you can confide in?"

Naruto thought for a second and stared into Gaara's green eyes. "Can it be you? Nobody gets me more than you do."

Gaara smiled a tiny bit, she flushed and nodded with muffled enthusiasm. "What was in the dream that hurt you?"

Naruto gave a weak smile and stared at the sky while they walked through the park. "It wasn't a dream, I relived one of the lowest moments in my career as a ninja. It was the most important lesson I learned, _'you can't save everyone'_. Now, looking back on it… it scares me… it scares me to death. I lost someone I loved, even in the short time I knew her, she understood me perfectly, the same way you do. Some time ago, I made a promise to someone I love, and as time goes on, the more impossible it seems to fulfill. Taking that lesson into mind, some days, I feel like I can't do it."

Gaara thought for a few seconds and gave him her 2 cents. "Fight Naruto, and never quit."

Naruto looked down at the petite red head. "Whaddaya mean Gaara-chan?"

Gaara stopped and pulled off one of her bracelets. It was made of leather, and had all sorts of symbols etched into it, however, that was the least interesting feature. It had a spherical red gemstone with kanji etched into it.

They spelled out, _'We fight through our pain, our souls break the chains.' _Gaara put the bracelet on Naruto's wrist and clarified her earlier answer.

Gaara took both of Naruto's hands and stared up at him, there was a warm tint in her eyes as she looked at him. "It's the other lesson you taught me when we fought. Our pain is what makes us strong, no matter what I face, no matter who I lose, I have to continue going forward, especially for the people who depend on me. Always move forward, no matter the outcome, and while things may not go the way you originally planned, the chains of fate will break and you'll walk free."

Naruto looked at Gaara and then at the bracelet. "Fate huh? As much as I hate predetermination… you may be right in regards to my specific situation."

Naruto and Gaara walked along in a golden silence, completely oblivious to the incredulous stares of Konoha's inhabitants, one of which was a purple haired vixen with an affinity toward snake charming.

* * *

Sasuke glared at his rice food pills and gagged, he had to eat two more to fulfill his daily caloric intake, something he'd never had trouble meeting before he went to train with Orochimaru. Just before he forced himself to pick up the pill, Kabuto barged into his room.

"Our new orders are here, there's also something here for you Sasuke."

Sasuke looked out the window of the hotel suite Orochimaru bought him for the duration of his stay. Without turning his head, he offered his hand and Kabuto flung the package neatly into Sasuke's palm, Sasuke looked at the box and peeled off the paper.

It was a bentou box with a card on it.

'_I know how cheap the Old Snake is when it comes to buying food for his people. Here's some __real__ rice to chew one for once!'_

_~Love, Karin XOXOXOXOXOXO_

Sasuke looked in the small box, it was full of onigiri and some kind of sauce he'd never seen before. Sasuke exhaled in releif and slid the rice food pills across his desk.

"Saved by the bell."

Kabuto peered over Sasuke's shoulder. "From Karin is it? … You know, Orochimaru-sama would be thrilled to have the Uchiha Clan make their return in Oto instead of Konoha. I'm sure Karin would be more than willing to assist you with that."

Sasuke stuffed one of the onigiri into his mouth and swallowed it. "An issue for another time, killing Itachi is my number 1 priority right now. The restoration of the Uchiha can wait."

Kabuto chuckled and shrugged. "Your sense of priorities is alien to me Sasuke, I don't ever think I'll understand it."

Sasuke thought back to the first real conversation he'd had with Karin, it was about a year into his training.

* * *

_Deep in the heavily forested training grounds outside Otogakure, the logs never stood a chance as Sasuke cut through them with a swift brutality. Having gone through nearly hundreds of them, Sasuke opted to conclude his training for the day and sat down on a flat stone. Karin was there waiting for him and handed the Uchiha some onigiri. She sat down next to Sasuke to patch up his scrapes and cuts from training, she decided that then was as good a time as any to get to know the young man better._

"_Sasuke-kun? Orochimaru sent me to check on you. Do you need anything?"_

_Sasuke's Sharingan eyes startled the girl when he turned to her. "No."_

_Karin sighed, and scrubbed some dirt off of a cut on his shoulder. She decided to prod him once more, only this time with something a bit more personal. "What're your dreams for the future?"_

_Sasuke perked up slightly and raised his eyebrow at the redhead. "… Why does it matter to you?"_

_Karin smiled at him and got out some rubbing alcohol, dabbing it on his cuts. "You may not remember it, but you saved my life a while back… I'm curious because I may be able to return the favor to you."_

_Sasuke winced at the burning sensation. "You shouldn't bother yourself with my problems, you'll only get yourself into trouble…" Sasuke's thoughts filled with regret as they drifted to his early days with Team 7, their permanently damaged relationship would nag at him in the early months of his desertion. "I've already dragged too many people into my mess. This is my burden, and only I can rid myself of it. Just stay away from me if you want to avoid a painful death."_

_Karin chuckled and smiled at Sasuke, she pulled his head so that he was facing her and enlightened Sasuke to her situation. "I work for **Orochimaru**, Sasuke-kun. A painful death would be a luxury in my case… I want to help you because I think you're worth the trouble. Sasuke-kun, let me shoulder your burden with you."_

_Sasuke's eyes widened a bit and the silence was punctuated by the blowing of the wind._

_He stared at the grass for a moment and eventually turned his head back to Karin. "What's your name?"_

"_Karin, just Karin."_

* * *

Sasuke took a pen from the desk and penned up a quick thank you note for Karin, as real food was a treat for Sasuke at this point in his life. He opened the window and grabbed a bird from its cage; he attached the note to it and let it fly off.

Sasuke shut the window and stared down at the dusty streets of Sunagakure. "So, what're Orochimaru's new orders?"

Kabuto gave Sasuke a truncated version. "We're to allow the Kazekage to be captured, but we can't let them extract the Shukaku."

Sasuke frowned. "That's an annoyingly tight operating window… how many operatives are here?"

Kabuto looked at the attached dossiers. "We have four sleeper agents in the city, they're to be activated when the Kazekage returns from her diplomatic visit to Konoha."

Sasuke perked up slightly. "What was Gaara doing in Konoha?"

Kabuto laughed to himself as he read the little side note in his mission parameters. "Apparently, she's getting married to Naruto Uzumaki."

Sasuke scoffed and smirked. "Called it... Shame I can't collect that bet anymore. The dobe would've had to buy me food at my request until the day he died."

* * *

Naruto, having parted ways with Gaara, and having finished experimenting with his tattoos, he decided to go to Ichiraku's to get something to eat. As Naruto exited the training grounds, he was stopped in his tracks when his eyes landed on Anko Mitarashi.

She was wearing a white blouse with some khaki capris and black ninja sandals, her forehead protector was tied around her neck and she wore her hair down, framing her face. She had a sort of mature beauty that Naruto had never really recognized beforehand.

Naruto smiled at her and jogged over, he noticed that she was carrying several grocery bags.

She grinned at him. "I was afraid you wouldn't recognize me Naru-chan."

Naruto raised his eyebrow. "How could anyone overlook you?"

Anko laughed. "Forget about me! Was that the Hiraishin you were using back there? I've only heard stories about it until now."

Naruto grinned and nodded. "Yeah. I'm gonna build on my father's jutsu and make it my own!" Naruto immediately slapped his hands over his mouth.

Anko raised her eyebrow. "Father? … _Actually_… you _**do**_ kinda look like him." Anko looked up at him and narrowed her eyes. "So _**that's**_ why you're living in his house."

Naruto scratched his head and looked at Anko. "Hey, you're not one of those gold digger types are you? Obaa-chan warned me about girls like that."

Anko rolled her eyes flicked Naruto on the nose. "Heh, me? Gold digger? _Please._ Marble floors and silk bed sheets aren't really my thing. I just need a couch and a refrigerator, anything else I consider a luxury."

Naruto followed Anko. "Where're we headed Anko-chan? Your place?"

Anko stopped, pondering Asuma's advice. "Not this time, Naru-chan."

_**'FUCK!'**_

_'Gah! Dammit! Don't do that you asshole!'_

Naruto, despite being startled by his tenant, grinned and joked. "Did I wear the _Insatiable Anko_ out last time?"

Anko ran her hand down Naruto's forearm and chuckled. "I'm always up to break another bed in half, but I want our relationship to be more than just you fucking my brains out whenever we're together."

They stopped on a bridge and stared down at the bright blue water rushing beneath them, Anko put her groceries down and looked at the young man in front of her. "Naru-chan, I wanna know what you're about, your hopes, your dreams, your fears, even your regrets."

Naruto locked arms with Anko as they leaned on the guardrail of the bridge. Staring down at the water, Naruto inquired. "Where do I even start Anko-chan?"

Anko kissed him on the cheek and wiped some sweat off his brow as she gingerly rubbed the dirt and grime from his face. "I'll be original since you've probably had this conversation before with the other girls… This time... start from now, and work your way backwards. What makes _'Naruto **Namikaze**' _tick_?_"

Naruto looked at the older woman and smiled, she rested her head on his shoulder.

"From now working backwards huh? …" Naruto chuckled and looked at his new keepsake from Gaara-chan.

"_We fight through our pain, our souls break the chains_."

~FIN~

* * *

AN:Sorry for the wait, but it made the most sense to end here, I also gotta plan out my own personal twist on the Suna arc. Stay tuned, Chapter 24 will kick off Naruto's fight to save Gaara-chan and we'll get to see just what Naruto's learned about his new skill. Also, Naruto's relationship with Anko is taking a turn for the better, Sakura needs to get her ass in gear or she'll lose the only guy who truly gives a damn about her…

~Breath of the Wiz

_Signin' Off._


	24. Chapter 24: Aishiteru

AN: Here's Chapter 24! Sorry about the wait, but I had to survive midterms... shit happens. Some of you were wondering what I'd do with Sasuke. My plan isn't to make Sasuke more likeable, I'm going to try and make him more sympathetic instead, there _is _a difference. He won't be a saint, but his canon characterization needs a bit of tweaking, which I'll do with my own interpretation of his character. Anyway, this one's for the NaruSaku ship, enjoy.

* * *

Hiashi walked into his office only to be treated to an unfamiliar sight. Hanabi was sitting at his work desk, scribbling something in the notebook he'd given her for her birthday. He gave his youngest daughter a suspicious stare as she scribbled in her sketchbook. Silently walking up behind her, Hiashi peered over her shoulder and deduced that she was making a schematic of some kind, he couldn't quite tell what it was due to its incomplete nature, but he knew for sure it had something to do with the bag of items sitting next to the office chair.

"Good morning Otou-sama."

Hiashi raised his eyebrow, impressed with his daughter's acute senses.

"Good morning Hanabi-chan. What is this you're working on? A new weapon?"

Hanabi shook her head. "I am merely assessing my ingenuity. I recently selected some items at random, I shall attempt to build a contraption of practical applications with these so called "odds and ends"."

Hanabi was lying of course, but Hiashi was none the wiser. While his expression remained stone-like, he was inwardly proud of the intellectual curiosity of his youngest child and placed a hand on her head.

"I've been impressed with your progress so far Hanabi, I expect you to do not only the Hyuga Clan, but also Konoha itself a great service in the near future. Keep working hard."

"Thank you, Otou-sama." Hanabi's stomach immediately growled after she finished talking, she ceased the swinging of her legs and rolled the office chair backward. The young girl walked off toward the kitchen for a light snack. Hiashi looked at the sketch once more and picked up his daughter's sketchbook. He flipped backward a few pages and was thrown for a loop when he found numerous sketches of a man who appeared to be the Yondaime. He squinted at Hanabi's signature and the date and raised an eyebrow at the revelation; those three pages were all apparently sketches of Naruto Uzumaki. Hiashi was taken aback by how much Naruto had grown into his father's appearance, he'd been suspicious of Naruto's lineage from day one, but this confirmed it. If Naruto truly was related to Minato, he officially fulfilled all the criteria of Konoha's Clan Induction Policy, there would be no resistance from the Council should Naruto Uzumaki's lineage be assimilated into the Hyuga clan's…

Hiashi, thinking back, deduced that the boy would become a much larger factor in his life in the months to come if both his daughters were interested in him as a potential suitor. Seeing as he'd only just recently become aware of his second daughter's infatuation with Naruto, he'd have to have a chat with the young man. It'd be a cold day in hell before he allows Naruto to give _both _his daughters the run-around, not only would he have to talk to Naruto individually, but he'd also have to make sure he was ineligible for the clan restoration act, Hiashi had seen firsthand what such an arrangement did to families.

Safe to say, Naruto would be wholly unprepared for such a meeting.

* * *

Speak of the devil, Naruto, having just given Anko the rundown of his entire life was staring at her gauging her reaction. She was currently leaning on him, her head resting on his shoulder; she took one of Naruto's hands and locked their fingers.

"You know Naru-chan, guys like you are only born every once in a blue moon. I still don't think you quite understand just how rare you are." Anko chuckled. "Hell, just having you on my mind is making _me_ of all people, a better person. I'm turning into a half decent woman, and it's all your fault."

Naruto laughed and rubbed Anko's hand. "Sorry about that! Is there any way you can think of I can repay you in?"

Anko smirked; her long tongue flicked out of her mouth and ran up Naruto's ear.

"Oh don't tempt me _little boy_, I'm having enough trouble staying decent as is. As much as I want to, I'll be going on a mission pretty soon, and sex before a mission is bad luck, _that, _and our relationship needs a bit more context."

Naruto sighed in defeat.

Anko flicked his nose in response. "Besides, you still owe me a refund on a brand new bed! I at least wanna get _one_ good night of sleep in it before you inevitably smash me through the mattress again."

Naruto sheepishly scratched the back of his head. "Yeah, sorry about that, I guess I got a little carried away, sometimes I just lose control of my body."

Anko let out a sultry laugh and ran her hand down Naruto's abs before she picked up her things. "You can get carried away with me _any time you want_. I sure as hell don't mind… just, let's break _your _bed next time, kay?"

Naruto grinned. "For sure! … Best of luck on your mission Anko-chan!"

Anko let go of Naruto's arm and started to walk away, but she paused and pranced back over to him. She yanked him down by the ears and kissed him, it wasn't as… _carnal_ as it normally was, there was a big chunk of love in it somewhere, but that was mostly overshadowed by her repressed lust… or was it Naruto's? Ah, whatever.

Naruto decided it was a good idea to prod Anko one last time, but he would immediately regret his decision. He caught the woman off guard when he'd roughly grabbed her by the head and shoved his tongue into her mouth. He heard her moan for a second, but was thrown off when she punched him in the stomach.

Naruto bent over, clutching his abdomen, he was unprepared to have the wind knocked out of him.

Anko, who was breathing heavily, straightened her disheveled hair and gave him a hungry look. "You're gonna make me lose it one of these days jailbait… You **know **how it feels when I press **your** buttons like that."

Naruto gave Anko a taunting gesture and grinned.

Anko summarily yanked Naruto into another kiss, a, much rougher one this time. When she was done, she threw him backward. "_Watch your back Naru-chan_, after I get home from this mission… I swear, I'm gonna have you wrapped around my finger… don't worry, you'll enjoy it."

Naruto nodded dumbly and stared at the almost hypnotic swing of Anko's wide hips.

"_That lady is something else_… See ya later!"

'_**Yes… she is. You're learning well, kit. You may even be considered average in your comprehension of females by the time you keel over and die, ha! Keep up the good work, and eventually I'll be able teach you some tricks of the trade.'**_

'That's one of those damn Catch 22's isn't it? I don't think I'll _ever_ get quite **that** far, fox.'

'**Been reading have you? I did get rather bored of taking your body out to the library while you slept. Try and make a habit of it, conversing with you can get rather stale from time to time.'**

'So is _that _why you know so much about human literature?'

_**'Hn.'**_

Anko blew Naruto a kiss and was gone in a swirl of leaves. Naruto had never been so excited about a threat in his entire life, for once, it seemed like she wanted more from him than sex, and that excited Naruto quite a bit.

She, along with Gaara and Sasuke were among the few people who could understand his pain, the pain of solitude. Naruto had just then realized that it was becoming difficult to keep track of everyone in his head; he had to devise some kind of system ASAP, since every last one of the girls deserved an equal chance. This was something he couldn't afford to mess up.

* * *

Sasuke's attention was so focused on his whetstone that he didn't hear Kabuto enter his hotel room. He did however pick up on the ninja's presence after a few seconds, turning to address Kabuto, he was cut off when the young man told him exactly what he wanted to hear.

"Sasuke-kun, I've been given the Akatsuki's hiding place just recently, we should scout it out before they make their move on the Kazekage."

Sasuke raised his eyebrow. "You were _given _the location?"

Kabuto nodded. "Long story short, I'm a double agent working beneath Sasori, our primary target."

Sasuke shrugged and replied. "I've never trusted the lot of you to begin with, that information doesn't change anything for me."

Kabuto gave Sasuke a disappointed look and straightened his glasses. "Right… I assume you've read Sasori's dossier?"

Sasuke nodded. "I'm not sure I could beat him in a fight on my own, he's got too many counters to my abilities… Deidara however, I could handle him with much less difficulty."

Kabuto put his hand up to stop Sasuke. "Don't worry about fighting, we're just here to disrupt the extraction." Kabuto reached into his pack and pulled out one of Orochimaru's seals.

"Orochimaru-sama is familiar with Akatsuki's Bijuu Extraction Technique, he told me that they do it remotely instead of gathering in one place. If we can place this seal on the Kazekage during the extraction, we can home in on the current locations of all of the members involved with the jutsu. Orochimaru-sama is going to attempt to assassinate as many of them as possible in that short timeframe, all active Oto ninja are ready to move on his order."

Sasuke nodded and went back to sharpening his chokuto. He stuffed another one of Karin's rice balls into his mouth without pausing his task. Sasuke contemplated a chance to finally use his new Kirin technique on someone that couldn't just get back up after a direct hit. Sasuke was half way hoping that either Deidara or Sasori would at the very least force his hand so he could truly test his limits and go all out; which something Sasuke couldn't do against Naruto due to the blonde's unpredictable nature and tenacity.

* * *

Naruto came upon a peculiar sight when he arrived at the gate of the Uzumaki Property, Mitsuki was leaning on the gate looking worried, she perked up slightly when she saw him. Naruto grinned and jogged over, closing the distance between them.

"Hey Mitsuki-chan, feeling better?"

Mitsuki sighed and forced out a smile. "Sort of… Naruto, we have a problem."

Naruto shrunk backward in fear. "Whatever it was I didn't mean to!"

Mitsuki grabbed his wrist and pulled him toward her again. "Not with me, _Hiashi Hyuga_ will be here to speak with you about his daughters in about twenty minutes now."

"Ah, man. What'd I do to get myself into this?"

Mitsuki shrugged. "Well, you _are _kind of dating the first in line to head the Hyuga clan…" Mitsuki grinned. "Not to mention the _second _in line has taken a liking to you."

Naruto pouted. "Ugh. You know I'm no good at this nobility stuff!"

Mitsuki opened the gate and pulled Naruto down the stone path to the front door. "Get used to it, you're one of them now, and you'll have to do a lot of this in the future…"

"Ugh. _Not _looking forward to it. At all"

As soon as they walked through the front door, Naruto ran into the kitchen and put his mouth under the faucet, he chugged water until he felt satisfied. Shortly after, he sprinted up to his room, realizing there wasn't time to shower; he instead opted to switch his dirty training clothes out for a white t-shirt and some black pants. It was here that Mitsuki poked her head into Naruto's room.

"Namikaze-sama, don't be so nervous. You don't have anything to worry about! He's just coming to talk for a bit."

Naruto sighed. "I... guess you're right."

This is where Naruto took the time to sit in the central garden of the house, it was a beautiful atrium with a glass ceiling. There were flowers and other small plants flanking the stone flooring in the center of the room, upon that stone floor, there was a large circular table with a tree growing out of the center for shade, this is where Naruto sat as he waited for Mitsuki to bring Hiashi in.

Sure enough, she came into the garden with Hiashi in tow; he seemed rather intrigued by the decoration of the house. The clan head's white eyes swiveled to Naruto, he bowed.

"Greetings Uzumaki-san. I must say, the unconventional design of your home is rather appealing."

Naruto grinned and scratched his head. "Thanks, but you should give Mitsuki-chan the credit for that, she's been in charge of the estates' maintenance and renovations for the past few years!"

Hiashi nodded and sat down. "I see… You must already know why I'm here."

Naruto nodded back. "I have an _idea_ of why."

"Then let us move straight to business."

Naruto became a little worried, but Mitsuki signed 'simmer down' with her hands and Naruto obeyed.

"It's come to my attention that not one, but both of my daughters are interested in you. I'm not here to tell you to stay away from them… In reality, I encourage the opposite. You see, our numbers are dwindling, and to prevent inbreeding, we must once again invoke the Clan Induction Clause. It allows the clan to branch out in order to stay genetically healthy, however… we can only assimilate people of a certain status, who _also_ possess no kekkei genkai. You're one of the few on our short list of eligible candidates, your Uzumaki toughness would make a priceless addition to our clans' abilities... Sorry to say this isn't out of the goodness of my heart, but my clan is in trouble… That was me speaking as a clan head, now, this is me speaking as a father. You may choose _one_, and only _one,_ of my daughters, I'll be damned if my daughters have to share a man for any reason."

Naruto put up a hand in a placating manner. "They haven't invoked the CRA on me because I don't have any sort of knowledge or asset to pass down. The only thing special about the Uzumaki clan is our stamina and physical toughness, _not exactly _as valuable as the Byakugan or the Sharingan. There's no need to worry… besides! What kinda moron wants _twelve _wives?"

Hiashi let out a sophisticated chuckle. "I suppose it is rather ridiculous... One more thing, don't write Hanabi off solely because of her age, if you look hard enough, you'll see something worth waiting on."

Hiashi stood up and bowed. "I'll take no more of your time, seeing as this visit was on such short notice. You're a good man Naruto Uzumaki, I can tell. I just hope one of my daughters is the one who steals your heart. I'll see myself to the door, have a nice day."

As the clan head left the room, Naruto let go of the breath he didn't realize he was holding. Mitsuki smiled at him.

"That wasn't so hard now, was it Namikaze-sama?"

Naruto chuckled in relief and scratched the back of his head. "… So, now what?"

Mitsuki thought for a second and smirked at Naruto. "Well, I _do _have a present for you, but I can't give you it just yet. I've got some work to do on the house… come by my room tomorrow night." Mitsuki walked around the table and whispered in Naruto's ear. "_You won't be needing my permission…_"

Naruto's face heated up and Mitsuki walked out of the garden, humming a familiar tune. Once again, Naruto would be taking a long, freezing cold shower.

* * *

After stepping out of his much-needed cold shower, Naruto pulled on some grey sweats and a black t-shirt. The draft from the AC made him shiver a bit, reminding him of the night before. Such memories caused his last few encounters with Sakura to replay in his mind.

Naruto left his room and walked downstairs to the kitchen. Completely oblivious to the ogling maids, he went to the fridge and took out a large tub of rice, tasting some of it; he grabbed an assortment of spices to enhance the flavor. After mixing the spices in thoroughly, he tagged the fridge with his seal and then teleported back up to his room.

Naruto snatched familiar looking orange and black jacket from his bed and grabbed his ninja-sandals from the closet. After flashing back downstairs to the fridge, he felt a slight pang of dizziness, as he was still unused to the speed at which the Kyuubi-powered Hiraishin teleported him. To an outside viewer, the increase in speed would seem negligible at best, but Naruto had estimated that it was nearly 40% faster than a Hiraishin powered by human chakra.

Once he grabbed the tub of rice, he went out the door and jogged toward the gate. Naruto nimbly flipped over it and coincidentally, landed in a Cherry Blossom tree. He chuckled at the poetic nature of his situation and continued on his way, bouncing from branch to branch, of course taking the quickest route to Sakura's house. After one final leap into the evening sky, he landed at her door.

The first thing Naruto did, was to take a knee and mark her welcome mat with his new tattoos. Naruto pondered its practicality in battle, as he needed about four seconds of uninterrupted contact with an object to tether the jutsu. Along with that, he was incapable of using it on anything with a chakra circulation system, as the movement of the chakra would disrupt the jutsu's mark, so living things were out of the question for the time being.

An orange seal appeared on the mat and slowly dissipated, taking this as a successful usage of the _Kitsune Kaminari no Jutsu(Fox's Thunder Technique)_. Naruto picked up his rice and took a deep breath; he slowly, but firmly knocked on Sakura's door.

There was a pause, and Naruto heard someone fiddling with the lock. The door creaked open, and the instant Sakura laid her eyes on Naruto, she went pink, gasped, and slammed the door shut.

Naruto's eye twitched and a vein on his forehead bulged out. "OOOOOI! Sakura-chan! What was that about huh?!"

Naruto was about to knock on the door again, but it swung open to reveal a bowing Sakura.

Her voice wavered; it was full of nervous energy, something Naruto was privy to nowadays. "S-sorry about that, I'm just surprised to see you… I didn't know you'd stop by today."

Naruto calmed down a bit and smiled, handing Sakura his tub of rice. "You're a vegetarian now right? Who else was gonna eat that steak for you?"

Sakura thought back to the offer she'd made Naruto and gently pulled him inside by his hand. "Naruto, I've been wanting to apologize for the way I acted the last time we talked, I'm just… confused right now."

Sakura had pulled him into her living room, so he sat down on her couch; she then took the tub of rice and sat it on the counter. Nervously pulling the packaged meat from the fridge, she lamented her lack of experience in preparing such a high quality dish. While she was able to cobble together some knowledge shortly after she bought it, Sakura still hadn't tested herself in cooking meat.

Naruto watched her zoom through the kitchen with a laser-like focus, not even stopping to realize that Naruto was staring at her intently. After about thirty seconds, Sakura had unintentionally locked eyes with Naruto, who was about to say something when he noticed the slabs of uncooked meat begin to slide off of the cutting board she was carrying.

Thinking quickly, Naruto took a coin from Sakura's bowl of change on the coffee table and bounced it into the kitchen at her feet. There was a flash of orange light and Naruto was standing face to face with Sakura... or in this case, more like chest to face, he steadying the cutting board with his hands.

"Wouldn't wanna ruin your hard work so early right?"

Sakura gasped at Naruto's sudden proximity; also being reminded of the day he arrived. It never ceased to amaze her how much taller than her Naruto had become. Her eye twitched and she gaped in confusion. "Wha-? How?…"

Naruto grinned and took the cutting board from Sakura, he placed it on the counter next to her other ingredients.

"I call it _Kitsune Kaminari no Jutsu… _It's like my dad's Hiraishin, only more potent… for… obvious reasons." Naruto punctuated his claim by firing a small jet of red chakra upward from one of his palms. "It uses the fox's chakra to break the restraints built into the original Hiraishin seal."

Sakura stared at him, slightly worried. "Naruto? ... Are you sure it's a good idea to be using the fox's chakra so haphazardly? You Nearly gave us all a heart attack when you fought Neji during the Chuunin Exams."

Naruto raised his hands, making a placating gesture. "I have a working agreement with the fox, and Kitsune always keep their promises."

Sakura sighed and ushered Naruto back to the couch. "Sit down and relax Naruto-kun, you're my- _um_… guest!" Sakura quickly corrected herself and slid her teammate back to the living room. When she turned to go back to cooking, Naruto grabbed her wrist.

"Sakura-chan, food isn't the only reason I'm here. I wanted an answer from you."

Sakura looked out the kitchen window for a few seconds, there was a fox sleeping beneath a Cherry Blossom tree. Sakura's mouth upturned slightly at the coincidence, she then turned her attention to Naruto.

"I'm… not sure… Naruto, I think I-..."

Naruto filled in her sentence, but with the wrong words of course. "Still love Sasuke, right?"

"Naruto! Let me fin-! … –ish?"

Sakura had turned pink in frustration, she was at first going to slap Naruto across the face, at least until she noticed that same fiery look in his eyes that he had on the Great Naruto Bridge those years ago.

Sakura felt guilty and straightened Naruto's signature jacket, "Naruto-kun, tell me, why are you going through with this? I know you made a promise, but there's got to be more to it than that."

Naruto raised his eyebrow and nonchalantly stated the obvious.

"Because I love you, Sakura-chan."

Naruto grinned hard enough so that his eyes were shut. "It doesn't get much simpler than that, right?"

Sakura's heart skipped and she felt a lump in her throat; his words made her knees buckle beneath her own weight.

'_No! No! No! SAKURA, DO NOT FAINT!'_

'_**Kiss him! Kiss him!' **_

Naruto's lips upturned and he stared directly into her soul, his eyes had a strange weariness to them, something Sakura had never noticed beforehand.

"Do you not believe me? It really _is_ that simple Sakura-chan."

Naruto cracked his neck and continued his little monologue. He was under the assumption that she didn't believe him, but he was completely off base. Understandably, Naruto was still a bit new at reading social cues, so he unintentionally opted to press Sakura's buttons even more.

"Okay… how 'bout this then? … If the only way for me to see you smile like you used to, is to bring Sasuke home, I'll do it… somehow. I just want you to be happy again, ya know? I see you smile from time to time, but _something's_ missing, and I think it's Sasuke... Sakura-chan, I know how to spot an empty smile better than anyone, and fake smiles have been your M.O. ever since Sasuke left us."

Sakura, instead of being the same color as her hair, was more a shade of red, matching her clothing. She started to fidget and smile at the floor; her fingers were locked together, with her toes pointing inward. Naruto became suspicious of her posture and braced himself.

When she looked back up at Naruto, she seemed worried about him. "And… what would you do if I chose to be with Sasuke after you bring him back?"

Naruto raised his eyebrow in confusion. "Wasn't that the idea from the get-go? … I'm not doing it for _him_, I know that for sure. It doesn't matter how far I have to go, I promised you a happy ending and I'll die before I fail you again."

One could say Sakura's heart melted then and there, but that would be an understatement of the highest measure, it would be more in line to say that her heart evaporated. Sakura beamed and gave Naruto a bone-crunching hug, burying her face into his chest. She would have said something to him, but words were beyond her at the moment, instead, she yanked the blonde down and kissed him on the cheek. This time, Naruto was the one who turned the same color as his teammates hair.

"Naruto, I really don't deserve your affections."

Naruto scratched his head and smirked. "Yes you do, you just don't remember why. A small act of kindness can mean the world to someone else, I'll let you figure that one out on your own, you're more than smart enough."

Sakura stared at him with a vested confusion, her mind swirled with emotion. _'Really, what'd I do to catch the eyes of someone like him? I'm… just Sakura Haruno, no one special. What did I do back then?'_

Naruto looked at her, she was obviously deep in thought, so he figured he'd throw her a bone. "I'll give you a hint, _you were the first person to give me a reason to fight_, think back on that when you have some time."

Sakura smiled up at Naruto with a strange look in her eye. "Naruto-kun, you shouldn't have such a rigid idea of the promise you made me, things can change… _Anything _can change. I know I can't stop you from going through with this, I understand better than anyone how you are with promises… just… stay with me. If I lost you I… don't want to imagine what I'd do."

Naruto stared back at her like a deer in headlights.

"Naruto, if you're the price of passage back to the way things were, I'm fine with life as I know it."

Naruto looked down at Sakura in shock, his mind was drawing blanks, once again, Naruto was without words in a situation concerning his love life.

Sakura released Naruto from of her hydraulic press of a hug and stared at him for a few more seconds, a look of admiration and infatuation adorned her features. She giggled quietly to herself and turned back to making dinner for two.

Three surprisingly tasty steaks later, Naruto was half-asleep on the couch, sitting next to Sakura. His attention was focused on the screen, and as he floated in and out of consciousness, Sakura took the opportunity to scoot closer to him. It was obvious then, that Naruto was completely asleep, otherwise, he would have noticed his first love scooting closer to him.

She stared at his face for a moment and wiped some drool from his mouth with her thumb. She had trouble believing the scrappy half-pint and the young man before her were one in the same.

Sakura's eyes were locked on the rise and fall of Naruto's chest. _'If I… do I even deserve him? … I know in my heart that I still love Sasuke, but Naruto is…'_

Sakura's thought was cut short by Naruto's mumbling, she put her ear closer to his mouth.

"_I'll be… here... always…"_

Sakura's heart sunk when she pieced together what he was saying. _'… just too good for me.'_

"_Another… bowl please."_

Sakura, slightly embarrassed by her rather self-centered deduction, chuckled at the situation. Naruto was probably dreaming about ramen or something of the like. Even in his sleep, he had an uncanny way of lifting her spirits. Shutting off her T.V., Sakura, crawled on top of Naruto and rested her head on his chest, his heartbeat was loud and powerful, yet soothing, like the ticking of a clock.

Sakura stared at him one more time, she whispered to herself.

"_Naruto, I think I'm falling in love with you… I just wish our circumstances weren't so ... messed up."_

Sakura, despite her inner conflict, smiled and shut her eyes, drifting away into a dreamless sleep, the sound of his heartbeat echoing through her mind.

* * *

"Oi, Sasori, how 'bout we get this party started hm?"

"In due time, just don't get in my way… with your pointless _"art"_. I don't need you unnecessarily blowing up any more of my creations."

"Hah! This again?"

"Art is meant to be admired, long past the demise of its creator. What's the point of creating at all if your hard work disappears in a flash of light?"

"It's what makes it so beautiful… A matter of perspective, hm?"

"So it seems… the jinchuuriki's just left the tower, let's move."

"Alright! It's Showtime!"

* * *

AN: Gotta make sure Sakura isn't left out in the cold, right? Alright, the next chapter will mark the beginning of the Suna Arc, I have no idea how long it'll be, but I'll make sure it doesn't drag on any longer than it needs to. Also, for those of you who want more girls, I'm going to be having guest members in Naruto's love-dodecahedron. They'll only be temporary though, so don't get too used to them.


	25. Chapter 25: Dark Omens

AN: Don't forget to reread random chapters every once in a while, as some of you have noticed, I tend to reference things that happened before, it'd do you well in the long run as this story begins to become epic in length. Also, for those of you that aren't in the know, I've posted an uncut version of chapter 11 on adultfanfiction. It's under the name; **The Orange Flash: Lost Chapters**. Eventually I'll also post Naruto's encounter with Anko in chapter 18, since it never saw the light of day on this site. My pen name on AFF is the same, only with underscores in place of spaces. Anyway, here's Chapter 25.

* * *

The rays of sunlight coming through the kitchen window woke Sakura from her sleep. She squinted and repositioned herself so that she could go back to sleep, Naruto made for a nice pillow, and heater.

Sakura's grogginess evaporated when she saw the manner in which the light was hitting Naruto's face. He appeared like a work of art, never to be disturbed or moved in any way. Sakura, for the first time since Naruto came back, took the time to seriously just _look _at him. He _really _looked like the 4th Hokage, it was almost disturbing, but the whisker marks and his demeanor made him distinctly different from the photos of Minato Namikaze that were in the history books at the academy… he seemed more… approachable. While people said Minato Namikaze was an incredible person, the pictures made him seem like he was some God-like figure, completely impossible to relate to.

Sakura gingerly took Naruto's significantly larger hand into both of her own, she found it hard to fathom that he'd grown so much in just two and a half years. Even still, It was even harder to fathom that he was nowhere near done growing yet too, be it mentally or physically, they were still technically kids after all. She tried to imagine another two years into the future, she'd figured she probably wouldn't even recognize that Naruto if she saw him now. He already seemed so alien to her, especially since she'd never given him the time of day when they were younger, but now, only now was it just hitting her how far removed from Naruto she actually was, and she was likely one of his best friends.

Naruto, who was still asleep, shifted slightly and Sakura felt something brush across her stomach, it was twitching. She became flustered for a second, but nevertheless shrugged it off; he was still asleep anyway, so there wasn't anything to worry about… yet.

Naruto's eyes abrutly snapped open when he subconsciously picked up on Sakura's spike in heart rate, he immediately locked eyes with his mortified teammate, who froze in fear. Sakura's first reaction was to knock him out, but she was unsure of the consequences of such an action, she just stared at him instead.

Naruto, unaware of Sakura's reluctance to resort to violence, made an attempt to diffuse the situation; he didn't want her to hit him with that super strength of hers. Naruto had figured he could be out of commission for a day at least if she connected solidly.

In light of this probability, he forced up the warmest smile he could possibly muster, enough to melt ice even.

"Morning Sakura-chan! Ya know, If you were cold, you could've just asked if you could sleep over here with me, I don't mind."

Sakura just stared back, speechless, for several reasons really. There was the morning wood jabbing her bellybutton, there was the myriad of innuendos running through her head because she woke up on top of him… and lastly, but most importantly, the way Naruto was looking at her made her heart start to melt all over again.

Sakura, despite the fearful and confused look in her eyes, couldn't help but smile back at the sight of Naruto's patented 'fox grin'. Naruto was confused by her horrified smile, something he'd only seen once before, the day he'd returned. Naruto considered the possibility of her fainting and tried to make sure she was firing on all cylinders.

"Sakura-chan? Are you okay? … You're not going to faint again are you?"

Sakura, who was starting to look like a strawberry, bashfully shook her head. "… Hey Naruto-kun… you're uh… UWAH!" Sakura felt another twitching sensation and recoiled backwards, going to the other end of the couch. She pointed to the tent in Naruto's sweats. "… poking me."

Naruto's eyes widened and he turned pink, putting his hands up in defense. "Sorry sorry! Just don't hit me, please! I can't help it! It's supposed to do that!"

Sakura's heart sunk a bit at his reaction. Completely disregarding the awkward situation, she crawled back over and gently moved Naruto's hands out of the way.

"Naruto, I'm not going to hit you… and just to go on the record, I'm sorry about all those other times, it was uncalled for… I'm a bit more mature no- KYAA!"

Naruto's friend had twitched again, this time, brushing Sakura where her muscular thighs met. There was some hooping and hollering in the back of her mind, courtesy of her inner self, also, her budding physical attraction to Naruto pushed a few other buttions, far more than she'd hoped.

Sakura yelped, immediately leaping off of the couch and running into the kitchen.

"UM! BREAKFAST! YEAH, BREAKFAST; I'LL DO THAT NOW! YOU LIKE TOFU RIGHT NARUTO? TOFU IT IS!"

Naruto raised a finger in protest, as she started to scramble around the kitchen in a flustered haze. "No. I don't like tofu." The jinchuuriki got a smug look on his face. "You _could_ just take a cold shower if I got you all revved up or something… Sorry, but It's usually what helps me out when Mitsuki teases me."

Sakura, disheveled by her own adolescent urges, and the mental images of Naruto's beautiful servant getting all cozy with him, finally went over the edge. She paused, took a deep breath, and silently walked to her room. Naruto started to laugh out loud when he heard the water in her bathroom start running and Sakura's occasional objection to its low temperature.

'**Let's join her, you can't say she wouldn't enjoy it.'**

Naruto rolled his eyes and mentally smirked at the fox. _'Ah shut it. I'll let her ask me to do that on her own. Last thing I need is for her to faint again and hit her head on something… people die like that. Besides, she still hasn't told me what she meant by "anything can change". I'm still not quite sure if she knows what she wants yet, be it Sasuke or whatever else. I need more information to go on.'_

Naruto would have listened to the Fox's smug retort if it weren't for the fact that someone knocked on the door. Naruto mentally commanded his erection to subside, rolled off of the couch and walked over to the door. Abruptly swinging it open, he surprised the person on he other side.

"NARUTO?!"

Naruto yawned and cracked his back; he beamed when he saw who it was.

He snatched her up into a bear hug, completely unaware of the implications.

"Hey Ino-chan! … You wanna hang out later today?"

"Eh? … Of course I wanna hang out with you. … But… what're you doing at Forehead's house at 7 in the morning?!"

Naruto stuffed his hands into his pockets and smiled. "She invited me over for dinner and insisted I stay the night. It's a _miracle_; Sakura-chan's cooking is actually edible now. I'm glad I didn't have to switch myself out with a Shadow clone this time!"

Ino glared at Naruto. "Stayed the night?" She paused after shaking her head and then smirked at the Uzumaki "… Naruto, I want you to come visit me tonight, I just got my own place recently and I want you to see it."

Ino realized that Naruto was staring above her. Ino turned around to see Kakashi with squad of ANBU behind him.

Kakashi looked confused when he saw his student. "Naruto? …_Okay_… we've got an emergency mission, get Sakura so we can go to the tower." Kakashi turned to the ANBU squad. "I want you all to gather the rest of the team. Move!"

They all shouted in unison and flew off in different directions. "Hai, Kakashi-taicho!"

Kakashi rolled his eye. "I _really_ wish they'd stop calling me that." Turning to Naruto and Ino, he apologized.

"I'm sorry for interrupting Ino, but something just came up, I'll need to borrow Naruto and Sakura for a while."

Ino looked at Kakashi and sighed. "Ah well. Stuff happens right?" She looked back to Naruto and grabbed his hand.

"Naruto, come see me when you get back. _I'll be waiting._" She smiled at him, putting special emphasis on that last part. Naruto stared at her in intrigue as she left, likely headed home.

Kakashi raised his eyebrow at Naruto. "So you finally got Sakura-chan to-"

Naruto cocked his head off to the side when he interrupted his sensei. "Sex? No, I just came by for dinner and stayed the night. That was it."

Naruto turned his head and called his teammate. "SAKURA-CHAN! WE'VE GOT AN EMERGENCY! COME ON!" His sharp ears picked up on the sound of the shower cutting off and a rustling of fabrics. She came hustling out of the bathroom in a very revealing, red bathrobe, "What? What's wrong?"

Kakashi, in light of Sakura's state of undress raised an eyebrow at Naruto. "You did **_nothing_**. _Really_?"

Naruto rolled his eyes and walked out next to his sensei. "Let's just go to the tower yeah? Sakura-chan, meet us there."

Naruto and Kakashi disappeared in a cloud of smoke, leaving Sakura standing there confused. Naruto was once again a completely different person when he'd come home from that mission, she never did know what happened during that last sortie. Sakura resolved that she'd have to ask him about it later.

She went to her room and slipped on some jean shorts and a red t-shirt, along with her forhead protector. She didn't know where they were going on this mission, so she would get the most practical attire on after the briefing. She jumped out of her window to the nearest roof and made a sprint for her master's office.

On the way there, she thought about her previous night with Naruto.

Sakura quietly giggled to herself. 'I can honestly see myself being his wife at some point… If only I could identify my feelings for Sasuke… I **need **to know… Ah well, I'll deal with that day when it arrives.'

She landed on the tower's windowsill and climbed in. Inside, she saw her master, Jiraiya, Mitsuki, Shikamaru, Naruto, Kakashi, Temari, and a squad of 4 ANBU, one of which appeared to be Kakashi's girlfriend from the festival. She couldn't quite tell all the way with those masks on.

Temari, who had blood and dirt on her clothes seemed rather distraught and burnt out.

Shikamaru helped Temari up, getting beneath her shoulder for support. She limped over to Naruto with a grim look on her face. Tsunade nodded to the girl and she spoke in a rasp, clear and concise. She took his hands and pleaded to him. "Naruto… Gaara-chan's been captured by the Akatsuki. They're holding her hostage, and the only person they'll negotiate with is **_you_**. Please, save my sister."

Sakura looked to Naruto to gauge his reaction. While he had a stone-like expression that conveyed determination and grit, his eyes were slitted, and a shade of red she hadn't seen for a long time.

"Obaa-chan… when do we leave?"

Tsunade looked at him, worried. "As soon as you're ready, Naruto-kun... Go, save your fiancée."

Naruto stared back at Tsunade. "You're not gonna stop me? No explanation on why I gotta stay here?"

Tsunade shook her head. "I know better than to get between you and the Kazekage… just be careful, I don't have to tell you that this is a trap."

Sakura had vague memories of Gaara. She was that scary redhead from the sand that got all doe-eyed around Naruto, and _**she**_ was his fiancée? Better, _**she **_was the Kazekage? Sakura looked at Naruto, clearly worried for him, but she couldn't help but feel he was pulling farther and farther away from her, in spite of her efforts. It felt all too familiar to Team 7's experience with Sasuke, the more she moved to understand what made Naruto tick, the faster he'd pull away. First she learned that he was an orphan, then, a jinchuuriki, following that, he was royalty, and now, he was to be wed to the youngest Kage in history.

Tsunade let the silence continue for a few more seconds, for Naruto's sake. She broke it to relay the final details of the mission.

"All of you, meet at the gate as soon as you're geared up. Jiraiya won't be going with you this time around, so stay on your toes, this can get ugly. S-Rank missions are not to be taken lightly, especially since you'll be dealing with Sasori of the Red Sand, and Deidara of the Akatsuki. Check your bingo-books for up to date information on their abilities _**that we know of**_… Temari-chan, you need to get those wounds looked at, come with me."

Sakura tried to speak to Naruto as she walked over to him, but he was in another world, the fiery look in his eyes cut her sentence short. He appeared to look through her almost, those red eyes of his… she hated seeing them. It always meant that he was in pain.

Naruto looked to his bodyguard. "Mitsuki-chan."

She nodded and grabbed his arm by the elbow, she appeared to be saying something to Naruto, but before Sakura could hear it, they were gone in a flash of orange light. Sakura was snapped from her thoughts concerning Naruto by her sensei.

Kakashi put a hand on her shoulder. "He's a tough guy, he'll be fine. Just be there for him, he's got a lot to deal with right now."

Sakura looked at the floor, downtrodden. "What makes you say that?"

Kakashi raised his eyebrow. "These eyes of mine… they see a lot of things, and one thing I've seen, is that friends don't look at each other the way you two do. Just promise me you'll do the right thing in the end, whatever that may be. I've been down this road myself, though not exactly in your position… Let me tell you, it isn't a pretty one to travel."

Sakura looked at the ground and nodded. "Thanks for the word of advice, Kakshi-sensei."

Kakashi eye smiled and patted Sakura on the head. "Here's another one, we're going to Suna, invest in a cloak, it'll protect your skin and your clothes from the dust and sun. See you at the gate."

Everyone cleared out of the office, save for Sakura and Jiraiya, who could tell there was something she wanted to talk with him about. The toad sage raised an eyebrow and sat down on Tsunade's desk, waiting for Sakura to say something.

She finally did. "We're a lot like you all were, the Sannin I mean. Way back in the day?"

Jiraiya smirked and nodded. "Strikingly, it's uncanny really. I just hope you two don't make the same mistakes that we did."

Sakura looked at Jiraiya quizzically. "You're talking like I'm already with him or something."

Jiraiya laughed. "You _are, _in a sense. You've already got his heart by the balls, all you've got to do is seal the deal, and you'll have a once in a lifetime partner, or _husband_… if you so desire at some point."

"Jiraiya-sama, where do you think _you _went wrong with Tsunade-sensei?"

Jiraiya thought for a moment. "Well… we're okay **_now_**… _sort of_. See, Tsunade-hime's been the only woman I've loved so far, so I sat on my hands, and waited. I kept myself busy, writing books, traveling the world, you know, _sagely_ things. My mistake… I think I got too absorbed in what I was doing at the time and waited _too long. _She'd only seen me as a friend for the longest time, so I put her behind me and left Konoha, in hindsight, a bad idea. Mere weeks after I left, her life began to fall apart, her fiancée died, and then a while after that, Orochimaru went rogue, and after all was said and done... I wasn't there for her. She turned to drinking and gambling, and when I came back, she wasn't herself anymore. She wouldn't blame me for it, but it's been bugging me ever since. Old wounds healed, and eventually, we started seeing each other, but we found it off-putting, you know, the amount that we'd changed, I took to 'research' to cope, and she took to the bottle... Even so, we became close, hell, we almost got married!" Jiraiya chuckled and motioned to the two matching rings on his pendant.

Jiraiya sighed out of his laugh, somberly staring at the floor. "_Almost_…"

The Sannin cocked his head off to the side and stared at a picture of Tsunade on the wall next to the previous Kage. "Anyway, I realized that I couldn't quite deal with how much she'd changed, the drinking and gambling and all. We parted ways, only seeing each other for the occasional roll in the hay when we felt nostalgic. Up until I took Naruto with me to ask her to be the 5th Hokage, we hadn't seen each other for several years. Only since Naruto brought her back has our relationship had any form of stability… There's more, but it's a long, depressing story. What I'm saying is, don't let the world get in the way of your happiness. You'll regret it until the end of your days."

Sakura nodded. "I suppose you're right… But it's not fair to Naruto if I just pursue him out of nowhere."

Jiraiya grabbed his chin. "Hmmm. Your promise with him _is_ an interesting set of circumstances. Far as that goes, I can only tell you to confirm exactly how you feel about the third party in this little equation... but don't take too long; it'd serve you well not to end up like us, picking up the pieces after 20 years of lonely frustration. Heh! Look at me, an old man spouting wisdom, where's the time gone? I've kept you long enough. Go and save Naruto's fiancée, you've got a wedding date to beat!"

Sakura smiled a bit and nodded, she jumped out the window and sprinted off to gather her supplies. Jiraiya pulled out a scroll with his leads toward locating the Akatsuki leader, all except two were crossed off. He had two choices, Amegakure, or Kusagakure. Jiraiya went back and forth randomly and landed on Ame. He groaned, as he'd have to go shopping for a raincoat, and he hopped off the desk. When he hit the ground, one of the laces of his geta snapped. He stared down at the bad omen and shook his head.

"Nope! Nope! Nope! Kusagakure it is!"

Jiraiya produced another shoe from the scroll on his back and went to get something to eat before he left for Kusa no Kuni, he'd try his luck in Amegakure some other time.

* * *

Naruto grabbed a sleeveless white t-shirt and threw it on; he then grabbed his flak jacket and reversible haori. Knowing it'd be hot; he wore the white side out. Last, but not least, he grabbed an orange scarf from a box in his closet, he could fashion it into a hood if need be, until then, he tied the scarf around his waist to use as a belt.

Naruto looked to his dresser, and grabbed his orange-bladed ninjato, he fastened it to his scarf belt and went down to the front door to wait for Mitsuki. Sure enough, she came down the stairs geared up for a trek through the desert, she wore a tan ANBU uniform that she'd dug up from the back of her closet.

They walked out the front door and jumped off into the sky. Naruto was silent as they made their way to the gate, so Mitsuki opted to pry a bit.

"Namikaze-sama, I know how you feel right now, but you must refrain from doing anything rash. If the Akatsuki were to capture both you _and _the Kazekage, we'd be in for a truly rude awakening."

Naruto nodded and looked to her, his irises still red like the fox's. "Mitsuki-chan, if I lose sight of the bigger picture, I want you to knock me out. I can't promise I'll keep my cool in the event I see my nightmares come true."

Mitsuki concernedly took Naruto's hand and squeezed it. "Let's hope the situation doesn't degrade that far. Stay strong… Naruto."

Naruto gave Mitsuki a strange look.

Mitsuki slapped her forhead. "Sorry, slip of the tongue."

Naruto shook his head. "No, it's fine. I'd prefer you called me by my first name anyway. Let's get moving."

Naruto and Mitsuki took one final jump and landed next to the team at the gate plaza. Sakura, Kakashi, Shikamaru, and four ANBU operatives were all doing final checks for their equipment. Naruto landed and walked through the group as if they weren't even there.

They silently stared at Naruto, who inquired. "Are we ready?"

Kakashi spoke for the team. "We're following _your_ lead, Naruto."

Naruto turned his vision from Kakashi to the Gate as it growled open. Naruto issued a 'follow me' gesture and took off into the sky. The other ninja silently followed suit, at least until Shikamaru spoke up.

"Hey Naruto. What time do you wanna get there? If we go too quickly, we'll be gassed if we have to fight."

Naruto replied without looking back. "Whaddaya have in mind?"

"They think they've got us by the balls, but I believe _we're _the ones holding the cards. Temari told me that Sunagakure forces have them surrounded in a network of caves and are ready to move in if they kill the Kazekage. This whole thing is probably a gamble and an act of desperation on the Akatsuki's part. She told me Gaara lasted longer than they'd anticipated, so they were on the defensive by the time they'd subdued her. I'll have a course of action ready by the time we reach the outskirts of Suna this afternoon."

Naruto nodded. "Good. We'll hold this pace for another hour and walk the rest of the way. By my estimate, we should get there before sunset."

Sakura frowned at Naruto, she could feel the frustration rolling off of him in droves.

Sakura thought to herself as she stared at his back. _'I can tell, he wants to go all the way there in a dead sprint... It hurts to see him like this.'_

Sakura called ahead to her teammate. "Naruto. This is all a ploy to get you out in the open, if you act out, we can't protect you."

Naruto responded, but not in the tone Sakura expected from him.

"I don't care. Keep your pace up, Sakura-chan."

* * *

"Oi, Kabuto. Why haven't they made any move to extract the Shukaku? My Sharingan hasn't caught any genjutsu… We didn't miss our window, did we?"

"No… they've got something fishy planned…" Kabuto looked to one of the sleeper agents with him. "You there, have this message sent to Orochimaru-sama immediately."

He handed the masked ninja a scroll, and off she ran.

Kabuto turned his attention back to their primary target, he eyed Sasori with suspicion, thinking of ways in which this could be a trap for himself, and/or Sasuke.

"…We may need back-up."

* * *

It's time readers, the Suna Arc has officially begun. Naruto's pissed, Sakura's confused, Jiraiya's dodging bullets, and I'm excited to get this ball rolling. Thanks for reading, don't forget to review... 'cause I actually read what you guys say to me.

~_Breath of the Wiz_

_Signin' Off_


	26. Chapter 26: An S-Rank Shitstorm

I'M BACK! YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH! Didja miss me? ... Anyway, summer-vacation is in full swing for me, so I'll be able to write more often (w00t school sux). I have a lot of make up work to do for you guys huh? Anyway, after that long-ass wait, I'm back with more, and the Suna arc is in full swing. Enjoy.

* * *

Orochimaru lounged in his office as he flipped through the pages of a strange book. Upon closer examination, one could see that it was full of deceased ninja from various countries.

Orochimaru eyed the message from Kabuto once more while he fed the carrier pigeon a treat.

"_Orochimaru-sama, at the time of writing this message, we are currently in position and are fully prepared to interrupt the extraction. However, they seem to be hesitating, instead, they are setting up traps inside the cave. Judging from what they've said, it appears that Konoha has also been dragged into the situation, it's likely that this is some sort of Akatsuki power play to get both the Shukaku and the Kyuubi. In short, it'd be prudent do send us some reinforcements, both for my team, and also to stop Naruto Uzumaki from getting involved._

_~Agent Alpha"_

"_Kukukuku_… Reinforcements you say?" Orochimaru smirked when his mind wandered to the perfect ninja to carry out this mission.

* * *

The Kazekage Rescue Squad zoomed through the trees at a pace that would seem grueling to a non-ninja. Naruto was seemingly in a trance as he hopped from branch to branch; his blank demeanor masked hundreds of swirling thoughts and emotions.

Sakura's eyes were fixed on Naruto ever since they'd been briefed in Tsunade's office. She stared at him, eyes alight with worry, she had been hoping to a higher power that she wouldn't have to try and stop Naruto from acting out, not that she thought she'd succeed. While she hadn't seen Naruto fight yet, she could tell from their recent interactions that he'd progressed far beyond where he was when he left.

The monotonous jumping went on in silence for another half hour until Kakashi felt a chill run up his spine. He sniffed the air and a familiar smell came to him, he broke out in a cold sweat. Not wanting to raise a false alarm, he swiveled his head around and began searching. Mitsuki, Yugao, and the ANBU squad eventually picked up on Kakashi's distress.

An ANBU piped up. "Kakashi-taicho, what's wrong?"

Kakashi narrowed eye as he scanned left and right, his gut was telling him he saw something, so he raised his forehead protector. His sharingan's tomoe spun frantically as he looked around. His transplanted eye caught a blur in its peripheral vision.

Kakashi pulled a kunai and whispered. "We're being tailed."

The rest of the group's attention went to Kakashi and they slowed down before coming to a complete stop.

"Kakashi-senpai, any ideas who's following us?" Shikamaru inquired.

Kakashi seemed to become slightly more agitated. "Just one, and I _**hope **_I'm wrong."

A cold and empty voice replied from above. "You're not."

Everybody's head snapped upward, but their eyes were only met by the painful glare of the sun.

Kakashi slammed his forehead protector over his normal eye and yelled. "SPREAD OUT NOW!"

Sakura saw an orange flash of light, and time stopped. She rapidly flew high into the air and looked down, she saw that the ball of fire was still expanding, but at a snails pace. Sakura was about to begin flailing in confusion until she realized that Naruto was holding her. They stopped in mid-air and just sat there for a moment.

Sakura was snapped out of her confusion by the distorted sound of Naruto's voice.

_"Sakura-chan, can you break this fall without hurting yourself?"_

_Sakura found the sound distortion jarring. "Y-yeah, I'll be fine!"_

Naruto let go of her and time sped back up to normal. They both landed into somersaults, coming out of them next to Kakashi, who was in a defensive stance. One by one, the rest of the team regrouped on Kakashi and they also took defensive stances…

They were positioned on the road next to a river, Kakashi's attention was focused in the direction of the forest on the opposing side of the road. There was a long and seemingly eternal silence, they stared intently into the woods as they heard the rustling of bushes and grass increase in volume. Judging from the rate of the sound, whoever was coming had a slow and menacing walk.

Kakashi muttered under his breath. "Everyone, look at the ground until I say otherwise."

The group looked back and forth between Kakashi and the shadowed figure who stared at them from the edge of the forest. Kakashi spoke once more, this time to Naruto.

"Naruto, I know that you're supposed to lead us, but this is a special circumstance. I need you, Mitsuki, Sakura... and Shikamaru to continue onward so we don't miss our window."

Naruto piped up, still keeping his attention on the shadowed figure. "What's going on Kakashi-sensei?"

Kakashi eye-smiled with his sharingan. "Just go, we'll catch up with you later."

Naruto and Sakura knowingly turned and jumped away, they knew Kakashi was being serious when he made that expression, Shikamaru and Mitsuki followed suit.

Just as the shadowed figure stepped into the sunlight, Kakashi's eye widened as he heard five dull thuds behind him, the rest of the team was out for the count. Kakashi cursed and drew another Kunai for his off-hand and sharingan eyes met.

Kakashi funneled lightning chakra into the knives and menacingly spun his tomoe, preparing himself for battle. _'__Dammit! I **said** look at the ground!'_

"Kakashi-senpai."

Kakashi dismissively spun his kunai. "I **_know_** you have the Mangekyo this time around, you're not catching me off guard again."

"I'm not here to fight with you. I have things to discuss with you."

"We have nothing to say to each other, _Itachi_."

He sauntered over to Kakashi, stopping just out of arms reach. "On the contrary Kakashi-senpai..."

* * *

"NARUTO! SLOW DOWN! IF WE HOLD THIS PACE WE'LL BE TOO GASSED TO FIGHT!"

Naruto shot back at Shikamaru's pleas.

"No! We have to get as far away from that fight as possible! If Kakashi's fighting who I think that was… that means-! Ooof!"

Naruto ran into what felt like a brick wall, his teammates had already stopped, and were recoiling in fear. Naruto heard a familiar voice come from directly above his head.

"There you are fox cub! … Actually I'd say you graduated from that title!" Naruto could hear him hoist something over his shoulder. "You're not as scrawny as you used to be... Nice work brat, this may actually be a bit of _**fun**_."

Naruto hopped backward, the black and red cloak marked him as an Akatsuki member. Naruto narrowed his eyes to hide the shaking in his hands.

"You're Itachi's partner… You tried to cut my legs off."

Kisame tossed his hat into the air behind him and menacingly cracked his neck.

"Yeah, good times, good times! ... Call me Kisame. You and your motley little crew are moving a bit too quickly for your own good, we can't afford to have you getting to Sunagakure too early now, can we? … Let's dance for a bit!"

Naruto shuddered and nervously drew his ninjato.

'_SHIT SHIT SHIT! This guy's the LAST thing I wanna deal with!'_

'_**What Kit?'**_

'_How can I fight him off without burning myself out? I've never seen chakra reserves as large as his before. We could be here fighting all day and he'd still have enough left in him to drown this entire forest!'_

'_**I suppose there's no way you can with humans like him. I'd use the term "human" very loosely when considering the likes of him… Just make sure to almost exclusively use my chakra for whatever you're going to do, using your own creates the risk of your own chakra being depleted. Just don't overdo it, demon chakra degrades human tissue… but you already knew that.'**_

Naruto started to spin a kunai around his offhand as he carefully walked toward Kisame. He turned his head to the side to address his teammates, who stared incredulously as he approached the Shark-Man.

"You all stay back… You'd just get in the way, yeah?"

Sakura took a few steps forward. "What're you talking about?! You're forgetting the first thing Kakashi-sensei taught us!"

Naruto started to glow red. "This one's a _special_ case 'ttebayo. We've fought before…"

Kisame raised his eyebrow and grinned. "If you could call it that…"

Shikamaru grabbed Sakura's shoulder and shook his head. "I read Kisame's dossier before, Naruto's the only one of us with the correct skillset for fighting guys like him."

Mitsuki compounded Shikamaru's opinion with her own. "While I'm not fond of the sidelines, Shikamaru-kun has a point. This is the perfect matchup for Naruto-sama." Mitsuki was still nervous though, she could see his sword-hand shaking.

It made her wonder what happened during his previous encounter with Kisame Hoshigaki, she'd seen scores of traumatized ANBU who'd had encounters with the famed Shark-Man, they all muttered similar things concerning shredded flesh, or even that he _"ate them"_.

Kisame began a menacing jog toward Naruto, gradually building into a sprint. His razor-sharp grin was gleaming as he closed in on Naruto, who anxiously took a defensive stance.

Kisame made the first attack; he pivoted his legs and swung Samehada with one hand. The sword traved swiftly, but in a wide arc, it about waist height. Naruto hopped on the blade and continued his path forward, at the last second, he noticed that Kisame had finished a sequence of one-handed signs behind his back. Naruto skidded to a halt and jumped backward off of the blade and crossed his arms to block the incoming attack.

Kisame altered Samehada's trajectory downward, slamming it into the ground. He clasped his hands together to make another sequence of hand-signs.

"_Suiton: Suikodan No Jutsu!" _Water materialized at Kisame's feet and he swung his hand. A Great White Shark made of water erupted from the ground and headed straight for Naruto… who disappeared in a flash of orange light.

He was standing some distance back, only slightly in front of where he had started charging Kisame. Naruto pulled a kunai from the ground and started to play with it as he mocked Kisame with a grin.

"See… you may be stronger than I am, but you're _waay _too slow to keep up with what I've got in my arsenal." Naruto began to spin the kunai, and slowly, but surely, it started to glow a shade of deep orange. He once again walked toward Kisame, who's grin had faded into a look of mild interest.

Enough time had passed for the seal to apply, so Naruto suddenly tossed the Kunai high into the air, there was a long pause, and then, an explosion. Tiny shards of metal began to fall from the sky, peppering the battlefield with teleportation mediums for the _Kitsune Kaminari_. Naruto shut his eyes and focused, he could feel each and every shard, and with a relieved exhalation, he disappeared in a flash of orange light.

Kisame picked Samehada up and took a defensive stance; he was visibly excited by the new development. "Well, what the hell kid? Is that what I think it was?"

A chorus of Naruto's voice echoed from the trees. _"YOU BE THE JUDGE OF THAT!"_

Suddenly, a handful of Naruto clones erupted from the bushes and foliage that were surrounding the group of ninja. They criss-crossed each other as they rushed toward Kisame, swords drawn.

Kisame smirked and stomped and the ground gave way. An explosion of water erupted from beneath their feet… Kisame's excited grin grew even larger the instant the clones flashed out of range of the mini-geysers of water.

"You're a riot Uzumaki!"

The Narutos landed on their feet a short distance back, and then blitzed Kisame again, this time, rapidly teleporting around the field, as to create some confusion. The rapid flashes of orange light made the battlefield look like the night sky at a festival when fireworks were going off. Kisame figured he'd take some hits, so he had to make the best of what he was given, Pein had told him specifically _not _to go all out, as he might accidentally kill Naruto.

Kisame hoisted Samehada above his head for a strike; he selected a clone at random and took a stutter-step, standard practice for wielding two-handed weapons (though Kisame was strong enough to use such weapons with one hand). The movement was used to confuse the timing of faster opponents, allowing a swordsman to increase their chances of connecting with a swing, it worked. One of the Narutos hesitated for a split second due to the deceiving footwark. Kisame brought the weight of the blade down on Naruto's head before he could teleport away, and he was gone in a plume of smoke. Kisame had dispelled one of the 5 clones, but in the process, the other 4 had managed to pierce his toughened shark-like skin with their ninjato.

Kisame grinned and dropped Samehada, grabbing the wrists of two Narutos. "I'll get'cha eventually!" Kisame squeezed his powerful hands until he heard a satisfying snap. The other two Narutos teleported away, while the two whose wrists he'd broken dispelled.

Kisame yanked the swords out of his torso one by one as if they were nothing more than tiny needles; the orange blades clattered to the ground and disappeared as well. He gave a commanding whistle and Samehada floated from the ground to his hand, the bandages exploded from the blade, revealing a disgusting mass of sharp scales.

"So you've learned a few tricks, eh Uzumaki? You can stab me all you want, it'd take you all day to put _me_ outta commission!"

Naruto watched in interest from a tree, he could see Kisame's wounds beginning to close up. He wiped some blood from a small cut on his cheek.

'_Hey, are you sure there isn't some other bijuu that we don't know about? This guy's unreal, no way in hell I'm fighting that head on. At this rate, I'll never reach Gaara-chan in time.'_

Naruto never heard Kyuubi's response; suddenly, Kisame was mere feet from Naruto's face, sword at the ready for another strike.

Kisame's disturbingly sharp teeth made Naruto shudder as he flew backward through the air. Kisame charged after him, yelling in a mocking tone of voice.

"I SMELL **BLOOD** UZUMAKI!"

Naruto grunted in bewilderment, instinctively wiping the cut on his cheek again, Kisame could smell him too apparently. He started bouncing and weaving through tree branches, doing his best to dodge Samehada's scales, and Kisame's kicks and punches. Naruto dodged a kick from Kisame that completely destroyed a chunk of a large oak tree. He stared in awe as the bark splintered everywhere, Naruto landed on the ground and jumped backward once more; Kisame was hot on his tail.

He landed on a tree trunk and glared up at Kisame, who was dismissive of the confidence in Naruto's expression, he recklessly swung his blade. Naruto deftly sidestepped the attack, stomping the sword further into the bark after it impacted next to him.

The blonde roared, glowing an even brighter shade of red as three tails appeared at the base of his spine. He jammed as much demon chakra as he could into his legs and launched off of the tree, shoulder charging Kisame, Naruto could feel a couple of ribs snap under the force of his shoulder. Naruto's momentum took them both high into the air, further separating the Shark-man from his sword.

They began to fall back down into the clearing that they were originally fighting in; Naruto began to expel red chakra to use as a propulsion source, much like in his attack on Manda. The idea was to body slam Kisame into the ground.

However, Naruto was unaware of how physically strong Kisame was and was surprised at the Shark's nearly successful attempt to break his grip. Naruto and Kisame came crashing into the ground in front of the others, kicking up dust and pebbles. When the smoke cleared, they could see a 3-Tailed-Naruto and Kisame brawling at the center of a small crater in the ground.

Naruto was furiously stabbing and swinging his sword at Kisame, who didn't seem to bother himself with dodging. After a few seconds of watching, Shikamaru narrowed his eyes, he could tell that Naruto was losing ground even though Kisame was unarmed. He charged forward and yelled back to Sakura and Mitsuki.

"Naruto's separated him from that sword but he's still losing! Come on!"

Sakura and Mitsuki also charged into the fray. Kisame saw them fast approaching and smiled.

"Keh! So _everybody's _joinin' the party!"

Kisame found an opening in Naruto's line of attack and grabbed him by the throat, slamming him into the ground and then tossing him at Sakura, who skidded to a halt and tried to catch the stunned Naruto. In an instant, Kisame was behind Sakura, prepared to rip her neck open with his teeth. Before he could clamp his jaws down, Mitsuki tackled him and they skidded out of the crater.

Kisame hopped up, as did Mitsuki. She threw a punch, but Kisame caught her fist. He swung her in a loop and attempted to slam her into the ground, but Mitsuki managed to rotate her body so that she landed on her feet.

Kisame's eyes widened with surprise, Mitsuki smirked at him and grabbed Kisame's wrist with her free hand. She judo-flipped him so that he was the one on the ground, she then stomped her foot on Kisame's shoulder, pinning him there.

Shikamaru's shadow stretched to join Kisame's own shadow. Once the two shadows were connected, Kisame stopped squirming In Mitsuki's hold. His eyes widened when he looked up into the air and spotted Sakura coming downward, her fist streaming blue chakra.

Kisame started to laugh. "Looks like I underestimated you brats… SAMEHADA!"

The scaly blade came shooting out of the trees at Shikamaru, forcing him to break the jutsu and dodge the abomination of a sword. Kisame grinned at Mitsuki, and through brute strength, managed to slam her into the ground with his pinned arm. Mitsuki was still clinging to Kisame's arm, so he stood up and flung her into the sky as hard as he could, as if she were a discus. Mitsuki went zooming past Sakura, who'd spun in mid-air to dodge her teammate. She had built up even more chakra in her body just in case, she was ready to cause a localized earthquake if need be. However, Sakura was completely unaware of the properties of Samehada.

Samehada had slithered into Kisame's hand at the last second and he blocked Sakura's supercharged punch with broad side of the sword. The ground beneath Kisame's feet gave slightly, cracking and rippling, but the blade had sucked the chakra out of Sakura's attack, nullifying her strength. The medic's eyes widened and Kisame launched her at Naruto, with a flick of his sword.

Sakura slammed into Naruto, who was still struggling to draw a full breath after being choke slammed, Sakura bounced skidded along the ground, only stopping about 100 yards away, while Naruto was sent flying, he bounced off of a tree and into the bushes. Kisame then turned to Shikamaru and charged him, the Nara boy started flinging every sort of Kunai he was carrying at the charging juggernaut that was Kisame.

Kisame spun and weaved through the explosions and poison clouds, raising his sword to mince Shikamaru. There was an orange flash of light and Shikamaru jumped at the frozen-in-time visage that was Kisame, he was quickly yanked by the back of his collar through the air, only stopping when was crouched next to Naruto in a tall tree overlooking the clearing.

Shikamaru stared at Naruto in confusion and shook his head to clear the dizziness.

Naruto cracked his spine back into alignment and spoke. "Hey, stay here and think of a way to get us out of this, I'm gonna stop him from killing Sakura-chan and… where's Mitsuki?"

* * *

Mitsuki had landed in a lake a good distance from the battle with Kisame, who appeared to be toying with the team at this point in time. She dragged herself to shore, and just sat there on her stomach. The stinging sensation covering her back was taking its sweet time going away, she took a look down the back of her pants and could see that not only was her normally tan skin a nice shade of pink, but also, there were a few bruises forming on her rear-end, obviously from her epic back-flop.

Mitsuki groaned and rose to her feet, the sharp pain made her wince, she gave a defeated laugh. "I suppose a night of passion with Naruto-sama is out of the question at the moment."

She grunted, stretching her back muscles, she then jumped back into the trees, making a beeline for the sounds of explosions, clanging swords, and rushing water. Mitsuki reached into her pouch and pulled out a tiny scroll. She tossed it up into the air, and out poofed a bow and quiver full of arrows.

"Here I was, assuming I'd never need this thing again." Mitsuki put the bow over her shoulder, the drawstring holding it in place as she zoomed through the trees. She then took the quiver and latched it onto the back of her belt; she pulled a single arrow from it.

The shaft was wrapped from end to end with explosive tags, and the head was barbed so that it couldn't be pulled out without causing serious damage.

"This mission's going to get much worse before it gets any better."

* * *

Naruto was in the zone as he traded blows with Kisame, but there was a visible sense of fear in his dodging, he knew exactly what that blade did to people, and he wanted no part of it touching him. Sakura and Shikamaru looked on in awe as Naruto frantically flipped and twisted over the sword's scaly edge.

Naruto hopped backward and flashed through signs. _"Futon: Kazekiri no Jutsu!" _Naruto's blade was an orange blur as he fired a torrent of wind blades that carved up the landscape.

Kisame paid it no mind; he just hid behind Samehada, the giant sword taking the brunt of the damage… and chakra. It was here that Kisame noticed a glowing kunai fly past his place of refuge behind Samehada,

There was another flash of orange light, and Naruto was poised to stab Kisame through the neck. Kisame gave Naruto a bored look and caught the orange ninjato's blade with his bare hand. Kisame immediately stood up and kicked Naruto in the stomach before he could teleport again.

Naruto flipped out of his fall and glared at Kisame. "That's mine."

Kisame grinned and spun the small blade in his off hand, examining it thoroughly. "Expert craftsmanship… I kinda like it…"

Naruto reached his hand out, both his seal and the sword pulsed a shade of deep red, and the sword reappeared in Naruto's outstretched hand in a flash of orange light. Suddenly, Naruto heard a whistling sound, it whizzed straight above his head, and he heard Kisame grunt in pain after a sickening noise echoed through the clearing.

"Oh, that's cute... Uzumaki, perhaps you could point me to the person who made you that sword." Kisame dismissively wrapped his hand around the arrow, ready to yank it out of his chest cavity.

Naruto saw the arrow embedded in Kisame's sternum, but this arrow seemed to be on fire, after closer examination, Naruto could see that it was completely wrapped in what had to be at least 20 explosive tags. Naruto's eyes widened and he teleported to where he placed Shikamaru and Sakura, and then, teleported them milliseconds later to the farthest shard he could sense.

They reappeared at the most distant shard, but even so, it was still far too close to the epicenter of the explosion. Naruto tried to stand but a wave up pain shot through his spine and rippled through his limbs, he fell to his knees. Naruto yelled out a warning.

"It's about to blow up!"

Sakura's gave a short gasp immediately after she realized that Naruto couldn't move. She narrowed her eyes and cracked her knuckles, protectively stepping in front of Naruto, who seemed was grunting and shaking in pain as he futilely tried to rise to his feet. Sakura nodded at Shikamaru, giving him a thumbs-up sign. Shikmaru lazily nodded back and took cover, but not behind a tree or anything of that sort. He simply took a knee behind Sakura while he did inventory on the kunai he wasted on Kisame.

"_**SHANNAROOOOO!" **_The battlecry was followed by a flash of light, and then, an earsplitting 'BOOM'.

Sakura's fists glowed blue and she effortlessly pulverized incoming boulders and tree trunks like they were nothing. Sakura's sharp eyes spotted an incoming boulder that was a bit too large to safely shatter, if she broke it the fragments would hit Naruto. Sakura stretched her arms forward and gained control the large chunk of stone for an instant.

Things were moving in slow motion for Sakura, she could see the boulder's surface begin to splinter beneath her strength, so she did the next logical thing. In the instant that she'd caught the large boulder, she tossed it upward and it sailed above the group, shattering just late enough to miss Naruto. There was a final wave of fire that Sakura saw coming, she planted her feet and crossed her arms in front of herself, grunting in anticipation for the heat. She yelled back to Naruto and Shikamaru.

"Grab onto me! The last shockwave's coming!"

Shikamaru groaned and crawled up behind Sakura, wrapping his arms around her ankle.

"Why'd I even agree to this mission? _Mendokuse."_

Naruto struggled to move as waves of pain shot through his limbs, he'd somehow successfully managed to stand on his knees; he wrapped his arms around Sakura's waist. Naruto tightened his grip and braced his forehead against her mid-back, he somehow knew that not even Sakura would be strong enough to outlast the final shockwave of the explosion especially so close to the epicenter.

Sakura saw the wave of heat approaching and shut her eyes. Her muscles tensed and the wave of energy crashed into her, she was able to protect the team from the brunt of the final layer of the blast, but it was too much for even her incredible strength. Sakura's rippling legs buckled under the force and she was inevitably thrown backward into Naruto and Shikamaru, and the three ninja were launched into the air, landing in the same lake Mitsuki did earlier.

There was a large splash, and then a pause, Sakura wearily rose from the lake and collapsed on the shore... with Naruto and Shikamaru still clinging onto her.

Shikamaru groaned. "Ah... _Mendokuse..._ Good lookin' out Haruno."

Naruto sat up and instantly yelped when another wave of pain zipped along his spinal cord.

Sakura crawled over to Naruto and hugged him. "Naruto are you okay?"

Naruto defiantly rolled onto his stomach and tried to stand once more. "_I'm **fine**_… lucky for me, your butt broke most of my fall…" Naruto chuckled a bit, but that was cut short by a bolt of pain through his diaphragm, Naruto tensed up and fell back down.

Sakura started checking Naruto for wounds of any sort, but she couldn't find any that weren't already closing or too minor to bother treating. She went on to check him for any concussions or internal damage.

Sakura was as impressed as she was relieved. _"Wow, _not a scratch Naruto… Hey, what _was_ that you used on that Akatsuki? It was a multi-phase explosion."

Naruto twitched and grunted in pain as Sakura checked over him. "Wasn't me, I thought one of you did it."

"_That _was me." Mitsuki came strolling down the side of a nearby tree with a bow and quiver.

Shikamaru raised his eyebrow. "_A bow_? You don't see _those _very often… You almost killed us by the way."

Mitsuki placed it over her shoulder. "You're welcome… unless you'd have preferred to fight Kisame."

Shikamaru put his hands up defense. "Don't get it twisted, I'd take any explosion over an Akatsuki front-line-assault specialist."

Sakura stood up and rubbed the soot, ash, and splinters out of her hair and clothes. "Thanks Mitsuki-san, though I'm not exactly thrilled about my hair right now, you owe me a salon visit when we get back... Before we start moving, is anyone injured?"

Mitsuki and Shikamaru shook their heads and sat down next to Naruto.

Shikamaru stared down at the Uzumaki heir. "We can't move forward unless you're back on your feet. While I don't want to stick around long enough to figure out if Kisame survived that attack, forcing you to move now would only screw us over in the long run."

Naruto frowned, trying to stand up, but his legs gave out and he fell back down.

Naruto punched the ground in frustration, it cracked beneath his fist. "Dammit! We can't afford to waste any time! Kisame said that we were ahead of schedule… at this rate…"

Naruto's head hung a bit.

Sakura grabbed Naruto's hand. "Don't think about what'll happen if you fail, it'll only slow you down. I learned that lesson the hard way on a surgical table, it's probably the most important one that any medic can learn."

Naruto nodded. "… You're right…" Digging into his sub-concious, he prodded his tenant.

'_What's up with this? I thought I only used __**your **__chakra.'_

The fox paused and answered. _**'You did, but you used too much… Next time you have to do this, keep at least 10% of your own chakra in your system instead of storing almost all of it in your seal. You've damaged your nervous system.**_

'_Is that bad?'_

'_**Not for you, I can patch this up… Separate my chakra from your own, and then pull the human chakra back into your system. It should shock you back to normal so you can move again.'**_

Naruto made a tiger sign and visualized a ball of purple chakra splitting into separate orbs of red and blue. With the image in mind, he began to separate the human and demon chakra in his system, slowly, but surely, he could feel his energy return to him.

Sakura slung Naruto over her shoulder and deferred to Shikamaru. "I'll carry Naruto-kun until we get somewhere safe, I still need to take a look at him. He appears to have nerve-damage... let's get a move on!"

Mitsuki whipped out a compass and pointed in the direction they were originally headed.

Naruto wasn't paying attention, he could feel the strength returning to his limbs as his own chakra re-entered his nervous system. The group was about to move, but they froze in a cold sweat when a voice came out of the tree line.

"Oi... that hurt you know."

Their eyes widened and they snapped to the familiar voice. Standing in the trees, was a decidedly less-human looking Kisame, posessing even more shark-like features than previously. He flicked his tail as he addressed Mitsuki.

"You, with the bow. Where'd you get that? I _kinda_ want one of my own now."

Mitsuki pulled another arrow from the quiver on her lower back. "It's a family trade-secret."

She fired it at him, but Kisame caught it by the head in his teeth, he talked back while he picked his teeth with it.

"I'll keep that in mind..." Kisame's shark face contorted into a traumatizing grin. "_Wanna see something cool?_"

Naruto answered for his bodyguard. "No! Nonononono!"

Kisame flashed through some hand signs and fired a torrent of water from his mouth, it appeared to be forming a large sphere around him that began to grow exponentially in size.

Shikamaru's eyes widened. "Shit! WE NEED TO GO, **NOW**!" Shikamaru blurred through some handsigns and slapped the ground. A box of stone encased Kisame, but it was no use, it immediately began to crack and spray water through every fissure, the box giving way less than 3 seconds after it was formed.

Naruto prepared to toss another kunai and teleport the group, but there was no need, a wall of ice erupted out of the air and flash froze Kisame within his sphere of water. There was a gust of freezing cold air, and with that, came bits of snow, followed by large snowflakes.

The group turned to the lake, and even though the light of the sun obscured them, Naruto's heart skipped. A pillar of ice was standing tall in the center of the lake, and on top of it, stood two figures, Naruto felt a familiar presence, one that hadn't touched his senses in years, one that made him feel painful emotions that were all too familiar.

Staring from his spot on Sakura's shoulder, Naruto's eyes went red once more while he anxiously whispered to himself.

_"Edo Tensei…"_

* * *

AN: I decided to make Sakura useful, unlike Kishimoto. He really screwed up with her, she had the potential to be one of the most dynamic and interesting female characters in anime... man... anyway, thanks for reading, and I'll see you all real soon.


	27. Chapter 27: Ghosts of the Past Part I

AN: What's up guys? Here's Chapter 27, I've been planning out and re-writing the Uchiha massacre sub-plot, and I've changed a few things. The way I'm doing it will help develop and complicate Sasuke as a nemesis for Naruto, also, it'll allow me to do more with Itachi in this story, and more specifically, his connection to Naruto. Expect a surprise announcement on June 5th, the 1 year anniversary of The Orange Flash. Without further adieu…

* * *

**_Several days ago,_**

**_Location: Unknown_**

"_Orochimaru-sama, the cranial control rod is ready for surgical installation."_

"_Save it for our next pawn Kabuto, this one is to serve a special purpose… I only require control of her body. Her mind is to remain free."_

"_Orochimaru-sama, if that is to be the case, she may break free of your control at some point, I'd advise against allowing her to keep her emotions."_

"_True… however, she seems to have some sort of connection to Naruto Uzumaki. I'd like to see what exactly it is, and whether or not I can use it to my advantage… The Jinchuuriki boy __**will**__ prove of use to me in the coming months."_

"… _I suppose I understand where you're coming from."_

"_Kukukuku… oh you will. All in due time... For now, we remain in the shadows, an opportunity will present itself soon enough."_

* * *

Kakashi kept his sharingan eye locked with Itachi's, they were walking in a circular motion, both ninja mirroring each other.

Itachi spoke first. "I'm here to warn you."

Kakashi raised his eyebrow. "Warn me about what?" They continued circling each other, about an arms' reach apart.

"Have you ever heard the name, Danzo Shimura?"

Kakashi narrowed his sharingan eye. "What about'im?"

Itachi paused. "The Uchiha Massacre… it's _**his**_ fault it happened."

This bit of information piqued Kakashi's interest. "Interesting, but what's that got to do with me?"

Itachi spun the tomoe in his eyes. "Everything. He coordinated the massacre of the clan, public opinion would have you believe that I was a lone actor that night, but that isn't true. The massacre was actually an ANBU operation… does _volunteer only _SS-Rank ring any bells?"

Kakashi nodded. "I saw that mission posted… SS rank missions usually involve assassinations of Kage or other deniable operations... _I suppose __**murdering**__ one's own citizens would fall under such a category. _In hindsight, I'm glad I chose not to sign up."

Itachi elaborated his point as they continued circling each other suspiciously. "Now… they killed off the Uchiha clan… what would one do with the eyes of the deceased members? Your first presumption would be that they were destroyed, but that is untrue, this is where Danzo comes back in."

Kakashi began to shift uncomfortably.

"I was able to kill most of the death-squad and destroy the sharingan eyes that they'd extracted. However, by the time I'd finished them, only about three quarters of my clan's eyes were accounted for, I believe Danzo is in possession of remaining few. See, my father was the mastermind of the impending coup d'état, he and his inner circle had devised a peaceful solution to have their demands met under the assumption that the Hokage was willing to listen. I was a double agent, so I reported this to Danzo, who had just taken over as Commander of the ANBU. I was unaware at the time, but Danzo wasn't invested in reaching a peaceful solution to the standoff."

Itachi placed his hands behind his back and looked off into the sky, the two ninja continued their circular pacing.

"The 3rd, desiring said peaceful solution, ordered Shisui Uchiha and myself to go to the meeting of my father's inner circle and offer an ultimatum, negotiation, or all out war. If both of us failed to return within the time limit, it would be understood as enemy aggression and dealt with accordingly. This was when Danzo opted to tip the scales in his favor, he attempted to have both myself and Shisui Uchiha assassinated en route to the Uchiha compound, thereby forcing the 3rd Hokage's hand. We were attacked by an ANBU kill-squad and they managed to keep us from even reaching the Uchiha summit. By the time I'd defeated the ANBU assassins, the assault on the Uchiha compound had already begun."

Kakashi was stopped in his tracks by Itachi's words, but the ever-cautious Copycat Ninja was not to be taken for a fool. "Your story _may _line up with the facts of the massacre, but that doesn't denote truth. What reason could you possibly have to be transparent about all this?"

Itachi stopped circling as well. "I'm dying Kakashi-senpai."

Kakshi froze in surprise.

"... Danzo will refrain from acting as long as I draw breath, but now, my days are numbered, he'll make his move as soon as word of my death reaches him… While I haven't been able to figure out exactly what he has planned, I _**do **_know that he needs both _your_ eye, and either one of Sasuke's eyes, or mine. I told him that if anything happens to either you or Sasuke, I'd expose and kill him."

Kakashi crossed his arms. "There's something you're not telling me."

"I have my reasons… I _**will **_reveal this to you though."

Itachi tossed a scroll to Kakashi. "That's a written outline of Akatsuki's goals and operative movement for the remainder of the quarter, it also contains the specifics of Danzo's involvement in instigating the Uchiha massacre. Get that scroll to Tsunade so she can read it, and tell her to leave it with Jiraiya for safekeeping."

Itachi pointed to Kakashi's eye to frame his final point.

"Most importantly, _keep that eye of yours safe_, I don't know _**who**_ it belonged to, but it's special. Kakashi-senpai, that Mangekyou is very unique, and I believe that Danzo wants it for something. Sadly, the Akatsuki still has use for him, so I can't exactly assassinate him at my leisure, watch your back."

Itachi turned to leave, but froze for a moment, he delivered an ominous and cryptic line.

"Kakashi-senpai… _**be weary of red-eyed crows**_."

With that, Itachi disappeared in a swirling mass of the aforementioned black birds, leaving Kakashi to deal with his catatonic teammates.

"…Red-eyed crows huh?"

* * *

The glare of the sun obscured the perched figures, but Naruto knew who they were right away. Naruto somersaulted out of Sakura's grip and drew his orange blade.

The rescue team cycled their eyes between Naruto, these two new figures, and Kisame's frozen visage.

Naruto took some wobbly steps forward and chided up to the shorter of the two. "Impeccable timing was always your thing, wasn't it?"

Sakura narrowed her eyes and nearly had a heart attack when her eyes adjusted to the sun's glare. "Haku? … Zabuza?"

Zabuza remained silent, but Haku chattered back down to Naruto. "It's great to see you again… But given the circumstances, this is not a time for reunion. I-"

Naruto sighed and finished her sentence. "-_don't have control of my body_… I know how you got here, and I'm going to make sure Orochimaru pays for dragging you back into this world 'ttebayo!"

Naruto's red eyes locked with Haku's, and before he knew it, he was nostalgically trading blows with her in a taijutsu match. He saw Zabuza zoom past himself and Haku and he began to engage Sakura, Shikamaru, and Mitsuki.

Haku gave him a forlorn stare as they blocked, dodged, and countered each other's blows.

Her voice was soft and full of pain. "Naruto… I... "

Naruto felt his heart shattering all over again, staring at her pained expression while she attacked him.

"My body is moving _**completely **_on its own, I… can't make it stop."

Naruto caught her fist and she flipped over him to counter his leg sweep.

"Haku-chan, it's fine... All things aside, there's something I meant to ask you that day." They traded punches and kicks, almost as if they were dancing.

Haku would have smiled at Naruto if it weren't for their horrible circumstances at the moment. She sighed, if she hurt Naruto in any way, she'd never be able to forgive herself. Despite the fact that she could shoulder no blame for the present situation, she felt obligated to take responsibility for the safety of her precious people, even in death.

Haku incentivized Naruto to stay focused. "Naruto, if you can defeat me, you shall have your answer."

Naruto reluctantly parried one of Haku's needle stabs with his ninjato and took a defensive stance. "Haku-chan, why're you always on the wrong damn side?"

She smiled back at him and took her own stance. "It seems that this is the only way to get your attention, Naruto-kun."

Naruto gave her a forlorn smirk. "So you got jokes now, huh?"

She smiled back. "Naruto, show me what you've learned."

* * *

Ino's pouty expression make Kurenai's heart ache out of empathy. She knew what it was like to feel like you were falling behind the competition, though, not in this aspect of life.

Asuma offered to treat the Yamanaka heir to Korean BBQ since she wanted to chat about her "Naruto Dilemma", Kurenai was along for the ride, as a woman's perspective was crucial in receiving advice of this nature.

Several minutes into the meal, the pouty Ino finally began to spill her guts. "I uh… I've been doing what you said Asuma-sensei, you know, thinking less."

Asuma dropped more meat on the grill. "How's that been workin' for ya blondie?"

Ino pushed the food around on her plate. "It's been working wonders, but I _think,_ I've hit a roadblock."

Kurenai jokingly piped in. "Did a new girl throw in her bid for Naruto?"

Ino groaned. "Three actually…"

Asuma started to choke on his beef, Kurenai patted him on the back. The red-eyed Jonin stared dumbfounded at the young blonde girl.

"I was only joking Ino. Who are they?"

Ino fidgeted uncomfortably. "Well, I heard through the grapevine that he'd been seen around town with the 5th Kazekage hanging on his arm. She was that scary redhead from the chuunin exams, and apparently she'd always had a thing for Naruto…" Ino groaned and slouched down in her seat.

Asuma, after surviving his 2nd close call with food, fed his morbid curiosity with another question. "Damn, so he's got borderline royalty trying to hunt him down. Who else?"

Ino sunk further downward. "Hanabi Hyuga wants dibs on him as her future husband."

Kurenai shuddered at the mere mention of the girl's name. She had the pleasure of seeing Hanabi utterly dismantle and demoralize Hinata in a sparring match a few years ago. She was cold, calculating, and most likely an evil mastermind.

Asuma raised an eyebrow at his student. "Sooo… you're afraid of a little girl in this competition of yours?"

Kurenai looked at Asuma with a weary expression. "You probably haven't met her before if you're discounting her as a threat... She's the one that used to make Konohamaru cry all the time when he was in the academy."

Asuma's eyes widened as he thought back, he'd pick a battered and bruised Konohamaru up from the academy each day. "So **sh_e _**was his mystery sparring partner! I could never get him to tell me who was beating him to a pulp every other day."

Kurenai nodded and turned back to Ino. "You're lucky she's still a little girl. Who's number three?"

Ino sighed. "_**Forehe-**_… Sakura Haruno. I went to her house one morning and Naruto opened the door. It was _**waaay** _too early to pay someone a visit, so it's likely he spent the night. I hadn't anticipated Sakura realizing that she liked him for at least another month since she's so stubborn. Her relationship with Naruto is the deepest out of all of us, and if she really wanted to, she could have him whenever she wants… she's either already figured it out, or she's _**real **_close to it."

* * *

Sakura had to hold in a sneeze while the three of them took a defensive formation. Zabuza's mist was thick enough to where you couldn't see more than 3 feet in any direction. Sakura narrowed her eyes, she could feel multiple figures darting through the fog, but couldn't see them.

Mitsuki's glowing green eyes startled both Shikamaru and Sakura. "He's over there, 2 o'clock from me... at least the real one is, I don't know if he's made clones or not."

Shikamaru questioned Mitsuki's claim. "You sure you see'im?"

Mitsuki swiveled her glowing eyes to the Nara boy. "I can see in the dark, I can see body heat, and I can also see electromagnetic fields. I guarantee that he's standing right over there, however… I've fought a few Kiri ninja before, they tend to use water clones in conjunction with this jutsu. Those, I can't see. The only clones I can pick out are of the lightning variety."

Shikamaru dug into his vest and pulled out a scroll. "Mitsuki-san, I'm gonna need your eyes, he'll have to dispel his clones if we attack the real one."

Sakura cracked her knuckles. "And how are you planning to do that?"

Shikamaru smirked as he retrieved a collection of vials from his scroll. "Just watch me work my magic... Mind making sure he doesn't cleave me in half while I get us out of this?"

Mitsuki readied an arrow in response. "No promises Nara-kun."

It had been about 30 seconds of silence when Shikamaru finished his concoction. The mixed liquids had congealed and hardened into a yellow powder, Shikamaru attached the vial to an explosive kunai and turned to the two Kunoichi.

"He hasn't made a move yet, so it's likely he's just here to slow us down. In light of that, we'll have to force him to get rid of this fog. This vial is full of powdered Sulfuryl Chloride, when it comes in contact with water, or even water vapor, the reaction releases Hydrogen Chloride gas, and Sulfuric Acid."

Shikamaru smirked at Sakura and Mitsuki, as if expecting applause.

Mitsuki broke the silence. "_Um, Nara-kun_? Now's the part where you make sense, Shinobi Applied Chemistry is an _**optional**_ course in the ninja academy."

Sakura silently agreed as she continued to scan for water clones, or even Zabuza himself.

The Nara heir rolled his eyes and explained. "If the contents of this vial mix with this mist, we'll have a giant cloud of not only poison gas, but also acid vapor. He'll have to get rid of the mist if he doesn't wanna end up a bloody puddle on the ground."

Shikamaru blinked, when his eyes closed, they were fine, when they opened, Zabuza was face to face with Shikamaru, he had a death grip on the vial-strapped kunai.

"Let's test that, shall we, gaki?" Shikamaru could see him smirking beneath the mask of bandages.

Sakura and Mitsuki whirled around, Sakura aiming a punch while Mitsuki released a poisoned arrow. Zabuza defiantly deflected the arrow off his sideways forehead protector, and swatted Sakura's incoming freight-train of a punch, directly into the ground with his off-hand."

The ensuing explosion of rock and dust destroyed the vial, releasing the yellow powder into the air. An errant stone from Sakura's destructive punch slammed into the side of Mitsuki's skull, she immediately dropped to the ground like a sack of bricks. The Zabuza that attacked them scoffed and exploded into a shower of water, drenching the three. Shikamaru's eyes widened as the air around them began to turn into what was essentially mustard gas.

The boy cursed. "Not good, not good! Mustard gas fucking sticks to moisture! How in the seven circles of hell did he even hear what we were saying?!"

Zabuza's voice echoed through the yellowing mist. "You're not the first one to try that trick, I suggest you start moving before the mustard gas gets to you."

Sakura shuddered as she carried an unconscious Mitsuki out of the large crater she'd inadvertently created. "Mitsuki's hit!" Sakura saw blood begin to run down the side of Mitsuki's head. "… _**bad." "**_ We've _**got**_ to get out of this mist, there's nothing I can do about mustard gas. Shikamaru, you'll have to stabilize her, can you do that?"

Shikamaru became worried. "Sakura? _Why do __**I **__have to stabilize her_?"

Sakura gave him a defeated smile. "I'm the only one strong enough to throw you two outside the radius of this gas cloud… Other wise, we'd all fall back in if we tried to jump out. We'll go up in the air, and I'll throw you to safety."

"You're gonna fall back in… Call Naruto and hope he's fast enough to you in time, if the medic goes down, we all do."

Shikamaru ripped his long sleeve off and tied it around his face. He yanked the other off his arm and handed it to Sakura, she hastily tied it over her lower face as the gas began to envelop them. The medic pointed up and leapt into the sky, Shikamaru was close behind. Sakura spied a tree outside the reach of the now poisonous gas, and flung Mitsuki in a large arc in that general direction. In mid-air, she grabbed a protesting Shikamaru by the wrist and flung him on a flatter trajectory so he'd catch Mitsuki before she hit her head on something again. Sakura began to feel an unnerving terror as she fell back to the ground; the cloud of yellow gas began approaching faster and faster.

Sakura let out a blood-curdling scream that echoed throughout the battlefield. "NARUTOOOOO!"

Naruto side-stepped a torrent of sharp icicles to see Sakura plummeting helplessly into what seemed to be a cloud of yellow gas. Naruto, not having many options, reared back and chucked his sword as hard as he could, he then returned to engaging Haku.

After dodging a fist covered in ice, Naruto yelled to the falling girl. "SAKURA! CATCH IT!

Sakura saw the bright orange blade glint due to the sun, and miraculously, managed to catch it without losing a finger

Time stopped around Sakura, she looked down at the mustard gas, and she could see it swirling around a clear patch of grass. A skinless and demonic looking Zabuza Momochi awaited her on the ground in the eye of that yellow storm. He appeared fully prepared to cleave her out of the air with his giant sword. Despite all of his skin having been melted off, and also the fact that he'd probably been breathing Hydrogen Chloride gas, he didn't seem bothered by any of it, his blank expression would have one believe that he was rather indifferent toward the pain.

Sakura shuddered at the mere thought of the beast of a man that Zabuza was. Even with her strength, she imagined that 90% of the possible outcomes in a fight between them would involve her being cut in half. She floated there for a moment, and then she felt the sword pull her through the air at a leisurely pace. She seemed to phase through rocks and trees, even flying through the frozen sphere that contained Kisame, it was as if she were a ghost. The sword finally stopped moving when it reached Naruto's hand, there was a short pause, and then time resumed as normal, Sakura was summarily pounced on the shoulder by one of Haku's ice-gauntlets, she was sent skidding off to the side into a sticker bush.

She could hear a frantically dodging Naruto call out to her. "Sakura-chan! Get the ice off of you ASAP!"

The dazed and confused girl didn't know what he meant for a second, at least until her shoulder started to feel extremely cold. She looked at it and her eyes widened, it was a dark shade of purple, with ice crystals sprouting from the affected area, it was slowly, but surely, spreading down her arm, and across her clavicle bone.

Sakura punched and clawed the ice off of the frostbitten area of her shoulder, but the damage had been done. Her shoulder was now frostbitten, effectively removing her from the fight until she could heat it with something. Sakura dragged herself from the sticker bush and took cover behind a tree.

She watched pained expressions on Naruto and Haku's faces as they battled to the death once again.

Haku crumbled the ice gauntlet from her left hand and preformed a half hand seal, several ice-mirrors appeared, flanking her on both sides. The mirrors levitated and spun to face Naruto, whose eyes widened when the mirrors began to fire icicles and senbon needles. Naruto funneled some chakra into his legs and made a move to jump out of the way. Suddenly, a wave of pain zipped along his spine, and he only jumped a few feet to the left as opposed to completely out of the way like he'd originally intended.

Naruto crossed his arms in front of his face and was summarily shredded by the torrent of needles and ice.

Haku yelled in agony, she looked about ready to cry as she continued to fire on his stationary form, she could see the blood beginning to pool beneath him.

"NARUTO! PLEASE, GET UP!"

As if on cue, there was an explosion of red chakra, and up stood Naruto, looking no worse for wear. Three tails of chakra were coming out of the base of his spine, and he crossed his arms defiantly.

He raised his eyebrow at her. "Don't underestimate me so much Haku, it'd take _**way **_more than that to put me down. I see now that that body of yours is trying to kill me… I just can't bring myself to fight you like this... even with Gaara-chan's life on the line."

Haku continued fire needles and ice, but apparently to no effect. "… Naruto, we both know there are only two outcomes to this confrontation. Either you defeat me, or your team is wiped out, do what needs to be done."

Naruto's eyes widened, Haku's words reminded him a lot of the very words Kakashi had spoken to him on that bridge.

"_Naruto, there was only one other outcome for this battle, and that was for Team 7 to be wiped out, you did what you had to."_

Naruto wiped his misty eyes and gave Haku one last longing gaze. "My sensei told me almost exactly the same thing. I take back what I said to you then. Haku-chan, you truly are a ninja, you're not soft at all."

His expression went blank and he closed his eyes for a second, as if mentally preparing himself for what he was about to do. When Naruto's eyes opened, he zoomed straight at Haku, so fast, in fact, that an explosion of dust billowed from where he was at first standing.

Naruto's fist buried itself in Haku's stomach, causing her to gasp for air. Naruto got a disgusted look on his face and grabbed Haku's upper arms with his chakra shroud… He yanked outward until he heard both a snapping noise, and a crunching one as well. Lastly, Naruto delivered a kick to one of Haku's knees, dislocating it. This caused her to fall to the ground in a heap, and also, since her concentration had been broken, the ice mirrors that were futilely firing projectiles at Naruto, shattered.

Naruto straddled Haku's body as it struggeled beneath him, doggedly trying to attack him in some way, shape, or form. Haku looked up at him and sighed.

"Naruto… it's fine, the only thing that hurts is the fact that I'm trying to hurt you and I can't stop myself. If you want to talk, you know what needs to be done, you'll have to immobilize me completely."

Naruto shuddered and reluctantly formed a red rasengan in his hand. He shut his eyes and grimaced as he jammed the screaming ball of chakra into Haku's stomach. He could feel it drilling through the flesh, and finally, when he felt it sever her spine with a loud pop, her lower body finally stopped moving.

Naruto looked at the wound, and instead of a torrent of blood and guts, black sand seemed to pour from Haku's body. She was slowly beginning to break down into raw materials. Naruto's red aura of chakra dissipated, and despite the crippling waves of pain, he was still able to move through sheer force of will.

Naruto cradled Haku and touched her forehead to his; he shut his eyes as he spoke to her. "… Hey."

Haku closed her eyes and smiled as well. "I suppose my time is nearly up, what was it you wanted to ask me Naruto-kun?"

"Yeah… I uh… wanted to ask you that last night we shared in the forest, but I guess I couldn't gather up the courage to say anything."

Sakura stared at them intently, she couldn't quite hear what they were talking about, but the looks on their faces gave her an idea of what it could be.

"Haku-chan… what did I mean to you? I… need closure."

Naruto stared intently into her dark and lifeless eyes while she smiled up at him.

"Naruto-kun, in the short time we knew each other, I felt that you were the only one who truly understood my pain. Yes, Momochi-sama took me in and raised me as a child of his own, but he could never truly understand what it meant to be alone… you did. Naruto-kun, over those few days, you became one of my precious people, a friend, and I believe that you and I could have very easily become much more than friends. Naruto, I loved you, but you must understand that ship has long sailed. I'm dead, and now, all I want to do is rest, I'm just tired, tired of this world. Even though I've gotten the chance to speak with you again, there's nothing more painful and jarring than for a soul to have to experience things it can no longer obtain."

Tears began to roll down Haku's expressionless visage. "All it does is remind me of what I've lost, what could have been."

Naruto, who looked about ready to cry, hugged Haku's battered form. "Haku-chan, I promise you… I'll find a way to eradicate Edo Tensei so you can finally rest in peace. That's a promise of a lifetime, _**somehow, some way, I'm gonna do it**_."

Haku closed her eyes and smiled. "You don't understand how much it comforts me to hear you say that. Naruto, can you make me one more promise?"

"What is it Haku-chan?"

"When it's time for us to say goodbye, you have to promise me you'll move on from all this and live a happy life. You have too much to live for to waste your days away thinking about a what ifs and why nots, promise me you'll cherish and protect what you still have... as the Hokage."

With that, Haku went rigid and broke down into black sand. Her soul seemed to rise from the pile and it flew off to the north at an incredible speed, likely to one of Orochimaru's hideouts. Sakura, having managed to get close enough to listen to them talk, knelt down next to Naruto and hugged him with her good arm.

"You'll find a way Naruto, I know you will… Let me test your synapses again, it's likely your nerve damage was exacerbated by that little stunt you just pulled."

Naruto's eyes widened when he got a look at Sakura's affected shoulder. "Sakura-chan! F-frostbite!"

Sakura rolled her eyes. "_I know_."

Naruto reluctantly looked between his sword and his first love. "This'll hurt, but I can save you from it... It looks like it's… _spreading_?"

Sakura poked Naruto in the head. "_No_ amputations will be necessary, all I need is you." Sakura turned bright red when she realized the implications of her wording. "That… didn't come out right."

Naruto's expression sunk slightly, much to Sakura's dismay, she tried to change the subject, but stumbled through the sentences. "A-alright, Naruto, you're a walking space heater, I… just need you to put your hands over the purple area and it'll go away. I-if I'm lucky, there won't be any nerve damage... _–oh boy-_"

Naruto twitched a bit and stared at the affected area. "Only if you promise not to hit me Sakura-chan."

A vein on Sakura's ample forehead bulged. "I _**know**_ what I'm asking you to do. If you don't touch me, I _**swear **_I'm gonna-… That _also _came out wrong… Just do it!"

Naruto placed one hand on Sakura's shoulder, and stuffed the other into her bra, Naruto jumped in surprise, it was like touching an ice sculpture.

"Oi! Doesn't that hurt?! Some of your boob is completely frozen!"

Sakura shrugged and used her good arm to heal a gash on Naruto's face. "It did for a bit, but now it's just numb, and spreading too, this is no normal frostbite... Once I can move, we need to find Shikamaru and Mitsuki, she's hurt pretty bad, and I'm not sure how long he can outwit Zabuza _and _keep her alive."

Naruto looked down. "I wanna go help them, but If you're outta commission, we're _all _dead, _damn._"

Sakura silently nodded, she tried not to face Naruto because she didn't want him to see how red her cheeks were. It had been a few minutes before Naruto broke the silence.

"Heh! This time, you're poking _**me**__,_ Sakura-chan."

Sakura's entire face went red and her eyebrow twitched. "A-aren't you worried about Mitsuki at all?"

Naruto shrugged. "Sort of, you said that she was out cold, but you _also _said she's with Shikamaru. He can think his way out of anything, so she's in capable hands 'ttebayo. They'll be fine, right now, I have to get you combat ready." Naruto grinned. "…Just try not to cut my finger off with your nipple, eh Sakura-chan?"

Sakura grabbed a nearby rock with her good arm and crushed it in front of Naruto's face.

"I swear, I'm gonna retract my promise to stop hitting you all the time. From what I've seen you could probably take it... In all seriousness, I also want to thank you for saving my life… again. Heheh, here I was thinking I'd grown beyond the damsel in distress archetype."

Naruto wasn't listening anymore, he was too busy trying to hide his now apparent erection, Sakura eventually caught on when she realized he was ignoring her. Grinning, Sakura sarcastically rested her head on Naruto's chest and pinched his cheek, she chided him in a mocking tone.

"Relax Naruto-kun, _it's supposed to do that_, right?"

Naruto sighed and began to laugh quietly, the shooting pain throughout his body made it hard for him to truly appreciate Sakura's attempt to lighten the somber mood, but hey, how many guys can say that they got a free pass to feel up their crush?

FIN

* * *

I'd been going back over the story and noticed that both Sakura and Ino didn't actually have much screen time _**with**_ Naruto. With Sakura, I've managed to address that, but with Ino, not so much. When Naruto goes back to Konoha, I'll devote some screen time to both Ino, and _**Hanabi's project **_(No, I haven't forgotten, and neither should you… though… you probably have at this point). Now all that's left is a bughunt for _Zombieza Momochi_ before he can catch Shikamaru and Mitsuki.

~Breath of the Wiz

_Signin' Off_


	28. Chapter 28: Ghosts of the Past Part II

AN: I'm just beyond what most consider legal, and I've damn near run out of stuff I'd be interested reading on this website. Simply put, I've been lurking around FF since I was old enough to read. One day, I hope to write something incredible to share with the world, and the feedback you all have given me makes me feel like that goal is within my reach. Exactly one year ago, I decided to pen my first fanfic, this was done entirely on a whim, and now, one year in the making, this story is going to be bigger than I ever thought it could be (I've just recently planned out the entire thing, and I'm projecting it to be _**at least**_ 100 chapters in length upon completion. In light of this special occasion, I have a big surprise for you all in the ending author's notes… I'll keep the chapter short and sweet for you all, with a longer one coming next time.

* * *

_**Naruto Uzumaki: The Orange Flash**__** 1**__**st**__** Anniversary**_

_**Chapter 28**_

Shikamaru sighed and tightened the bandages around Mitsuki's head; he'd managed to stop the bleeding and was preparing to pick her up and move her. They were hiding in a den beneath a dead tree, the cave-like system of roots made for a great hiding place, however, Shikamaru knew such a thing didn't matter for foes such as Zabuza. Ever since he'd taken Mitsuki with him, a sizeable cloud of fog had been following them through the forest. If Shikamaru were a betting man, he'd put money on Zabuza stalking him.

He stared up at the clouds, wondering when he'd catch another break. Never in his life had he taken back to back missions of such high profile. From time to time, Shikamaru would daydream about the simple days of the academy, when life made sense. Now, he was trying to stop an S Rank criminal origanization from getting their way, talk about zero to one hundred. Over the next half Hour, he constantly checked Mitsuki's condition, while she wasn't exactly worsening, she was in no condition to be moving on her own, right now, Shikamaru had to focus on keeping her awake, since sleep and concussions don't mix well.

The Nara heir had also taken the time to concoct 3 more powdered Suluryl Chloride bombs for Zabuza. From what Shikamaru had gathered in the team's brief battle with him, he'd deduced that the Demon of the Mist had some sort of regeneration ability. However, his physical attributes would nosedive while his body was repairing itself, so if he could trap him in an explosion of mustard gas, he'd have time to outrun Zabuza.

Shikamaru took his signature thinking-pose and went over his options. After about 30 seconds, he took an explosive tag off of a kunai and wrapped it around one of his three vials. He used his chakra to set the fuse for 5 minutes, by taking into account the speed at which the fog was moving, he deduced that the sulfuric bomb would have the greatest effect at that point in time, also, he'd be able to escape the spread of the mustard gas in the allotted time as well.

The teenager slung a dazed, but awake, Mitsuki over his shoulder and made a mad dash for the edge of the mist. In this situation, running was really all he could do, especially with Mitsuki in this condition. There wasn't a single scenario Shikamaru could think of that allowed both himself and Mitsuki to live if he fought Zabuza head-on.

"_Ah… mendokuse."_

* * *

Sasuke was jolted awake for the fourth time by Kabuto's elbow... which was was starting to look like a prime object for a test-cut with his recently sharpened sword. The silver-haired ninja frowned at Sasuke and signed a simple _'pay attention!' _to him.

Sasuke turned his head to observe the two Akatsuki members, all things considered, it wasn't like he could take a nap with Kabuto around, so Sasuke chose to cut his losses. This stakeout had proven extremely dull lately, Deidara and Sasori sat there in silence for the most part, every once in a while engaging in small talk. Interestingly, this small talk had not a single interesting Akatsuki secret, nor even witty banter between them. For all Sasuke knew, the two men could actually be sleeping between, conversations... something **_he _**wasn't allowed to do apparently.

Sasuke flipped his sharingan on and off once more to check for any sort of genjutsu, but once again, there was nothing. Both Deidara and Sasori had failed to move from their seats on the rocks, it had to have been hours since they'd arrived in the caves, as the extraction disruption team's backup had already arrived, and was silently waiting with them in their little hidey-hole in the ceiling.

Sasuke stared at his Zombie-teammate and raised an eyebrow in mild surprise, he finally recognized who the old snake had sent to assist them.

The Uchiha boy whispered to the dead man. "...You were the last Kazekage."

His black eyes focused on Sasuke's red ones and he nodded. "Yes, I was once the 4th Kazekage, young Uchiha."

Sasuke looked down at Gaara, who was still passed out from exhaustion, and then, he looked back to the former Kazekage and scoffed. "I read about you once when I was still in the ninja academy... Rasa... you were a fool in life, and now in death, you remain Orochimaru's puppet."

The corpse stared blankly at Sasuke for a moment and then looked down at Gaara's seemingly lifeless body with indifference only a corpse could muster. "… I suppose so young Uchiha... I suppose so."

Kabuto jabbed Sasuke with his elbow. "Sasuke, don't antagonize our zombies."

* * *

Naruto had finally cleared up Sakura's case of frostbite, and was busy warming his hands in his armpits. Sakura gave Naruto a worried look as she was getting ready to start moving again.

"Naruto… Are you okay?"

"Well, everything still hurts if that's what you're asking."

Sakura shook her head and helped Naruto to his feet. "Naruto, I mean _emotionally, _I know you're tough enough to power through any sort of physical discomfort... but this is different. I know how much she meant to you, you have that same look on your face as you did on the bridge that day."

Naruto frowned and stared at a spot on the ground. "I'd rather not talk about it Sakura-chan… Let's go get Shikamaru and Mitsuki-chan so we can get back to the mission." Naruto grunted in pain as he jumped off into the treeline.

Sakura silently followed behind him, worried even more than she was a few hours ago. The sun would be setting in a few hours at this point, and it was likely that if they arrived too late, Akatsuki would just cut their losses and kill the Kazekage. Naruto darted through the branches at a speed that belied someone with a damaged nervous system.

Naruto now knew that Orochimaru had some sort of stake in this shitstorm, and that he didn't want Naruto reaching Sunagakure, this meant that Orochimaru would've sent someone stronger if he wanted Naruto would have to mean that Orochimaru had most likely ordered his puppets to kill the entire team save for Naruto. The thought of losing both Shikamaru and Mitsuki along with Gaara caused Naruto to subconsciously increase his speed.

Sakura, who wasn't nearly as light on her feet as her teammate, yelled ahead to him as he began to pull away. "Naruto! Your body will give out on you if you push yourself too hard!"

'_**The pink female is right, kit. It'll take me until sunset at the earliest to repair your nervous system, take it easy or you'll kill us both.'**_

'_Shut the hell up! You have no idea how it feels to be in this situation!'_

'_**You don't know the first damn thing about me you pathetic human. I'm trying to help you, now listen to your medic female. I **__**WILL**__** shut you down if you don't.'**_

'_What's wrong with you today?'_

'_**Oh? Perhaps you think me a bit more abrasive than usual? ...'** _Naruto could hear the fox's booming laughter echo throughout his skull, he started to growl in annoyance.

_**'Hahahaha! Do you think we're **__**friends**__**, brat?! We are NOT friends, I'd sooner crush you beneath my feet than make nice with you. We may be on the same side, but you would do well to remember that you're **__**nothing**__** without me, you only have control because I allow it. Now slow down before I put you down.'**_

Naruto's eyes shifted red at his tenant's unbridled arrogance. He seethed to himself and slowed his pace to something less stressful on his nervous system. Sakura caught up and grabbed his hand, she smiled at him and gave his hand a tender squeeze.

"Naruto-kun, please, use your head. We all have orders to take you down if you act too erratically."

Naruto nodded, but his features remained grim. "Zabuza will probably kill them if we don't catch up in time. I know Shikamaru can handle himself, but this is the same guy that nearly put Kakashi-sensei down back the-"

Naruto was cut off when the wind was knocked out of him.

Sakura's eyes widened in Horror when she saw a very angry looking Zabuza planting his shoulder into Naruto's stomach, her teammate was sent flying into a tree off to her right. Sakura watched Naruto rag-doll to the ground for a split second, but she nearly screamed when she got a closer look at Zabuza. He was once again without any sort of skin, all of his deeper skin tissue was exposed due to what appeared to be chemical burns, Shikamaru must have used more mustard gas on him.

Zabuza tried to bring the sword down and bisect Sakura down the middle, but her hysterical strength kicked in just in time. She reflexively caught the blade between her palms before it carved through the top of her skull.

Zabuza's eyes narrowed and he roared at Sakura, releasing a crippling amount of killing intent. The wave of malice and wrath had induced Sakura to experience a flashback to her traumatic first encounter with the Demon of the Mist, her fight or flight mechanism kicked in and she screamed, instinctively flinging Zabuza's sword, along with Zabuza into a nearby tree. There was a loud crack as he impacted the tree and he tumbled to the ground in a heap.

Sakura's legs buckled and she fell out of the trees, paralyzed. Sakura slammed into the ground and immediately rose to all fours; she was still stunned from the killing intent along with the memory of Zabuza materializing from the mist, eye to eye with her, a hand on her throat. Sakura dry heaved a few times, and vomited pure bile on the ground. Her body fought her every step of the way as she tried to move, but failed. Each attempt to stand was met with the sudden feeling of noodle legs the ringing in her ears was deafening, and her vision would blur in and out of focus. She heaved again, and up came even more bile, though this time, it was mixed in with stomach acid. Sakura finally understood how Sasuke felt during their encounter with Orochimaru in the forest of death, he couldn't move properly for hours afterward.

Sakura struggled, but managed to turn her head to Zabuza, she could see his skin growing back over the exposed muscle; she could also hear the spine she thought she'd broken, reconnecting and straightening itself out. Zabuza eventually stood back up, no worse for wear, he looked at her in mild annoyance and walked over to execute her.

Sakura could hear Naruto struggling to get up, so she knew he wouldn't be saving her this time around. Remembering how Sasuke escaped, Sakura fought through the paralyzing nature of Zabuza's technique and slammed her fist into her side. The adrenaline from the pain was enough to allow her turn around and throw some dirt in Zabuza's eyes. After stunning the demon, her body went limp again and she fell back to the ground. The ringing in her ears picked up again and she was tortured by the old image of Zabuza's murderous yet dismissive glare.

When Sakura looked up, Zabuza was in front of her, blocking her path. Despite all the signals from her brain, Sakura's body refused to obey her commands. Before Zabuza could even lift his blade up for a strike, Naruto rocketed out of the ground between them with a rasengan in hand, he jammed the ball into Zabuza's stomach and his guts were ripped from his body, breaking down into black sand shortly afterward.

Zabuza was sent spinning backward and slammed into a large boulder, pulverizing it. Naruto fell to a knee and looked at Sakura.

"Sakura-chan, we don't have much time before he's up and after us again… You look like you've seen a ghost."

Sakura didn't reply, she just stared up at Naruto with a blank expression.

Naruto quickly made the comparison to Sasuke's condition after their run-in with Orochimaru in the forest of death.

"Oh shit." Naruto picked up Sakura, who went limp in his arms. He squeezed her face and talked precisely and sternly.

"Sakura-chan. I need you to look at me and calm down… You're having a panic attack. This is the first time someone has used the Sakki Technique on you, and I know how you feel."

Naruto could feel Sakura relax in his grip, after a few seconds, the glazed over look disappeared from her eyes, however, her expression was still one of blank astonishment. She simply hugged Naruto and didn't say a word.

Naruto made a shadow clone and had it take her somewhere she could regain control.

The real Naruto turned to Zabuza, who dug himself out of the pulverized rock.

He yelled at the deceased mist ninja. "Oi! Zabuza! No words of wisdom for an up and coming ninja?"

The man blankly stared at him and approached, sword at the ready.

Naruto raised his eyebrow, Ero-sannin told him all about Edo-tensei, and Haku seemed more in control than his teacher's description had originally implied. Zabuza seemed more in line with what Ero-sannin had told him that day; the ninja's failure to even acknowledge Naruto was proof in and of itself.

Naruto cocked his head to the side and readied his sword, the Demon of the mist took his famous pose and mist creeped into the air around them. Naruto frantically formed another rasengan, the air whirled around him and the mist was pushed away, revealing… nothing. Zabuza was nowhere in sight.

Naruto heard the sound of sand falling to the ground behind him. When Naruto whirled around to counter attack, he was greeted by Zabuza's visage once more. He was poised to pommel strike Naruto in the back of the head, but he appeared frozen in place. Naruto suddenly noticed a familiar chirping, and suddenly, electricity came crackling from Zabuza abdomen. The mist ninja's eyes widened and he began twitch as energy jolted up and down his severed spine. Zabuza was promptly ripped in half, right down the middle in a shower of sparks and blue electricity. Kakashi stood there and watched the mist ninja breakdown into raw materials, the man's spirit rose from he black sand and zoomed off into the sky. The glow of the _Raikiri_ faded from both of Kakashi's hands.

Kakashi raised eye-smiled at Naruto and crossed his arms. "Thanks for keeping his attention for me, pulling that off was _a lot _harder the first time around. I get the feeling we'll be seeing more of him soon… Where's everyone else?"

Naruto whistled and his shadow clone came out of the tree line, carrying Sakura on his back.

"Zabuza used the Sakki Technique on her a few minutes ago, she can't move on her own yet... We should be good to move again as soon as we find Shikamaru and Mitsuki-chan 'ttebayo."

Kakashi nodded and pressed the talk button on his earpiece. "I've dealt with Zabuza, and I'm here with Naruto and Sakura, we need to get moving again. What's your location?"

There was a long pause and Mitsuki of all people answered. "We're fine Kakashi-taicho… though I probably have a concussion... Meet us at Anju Oasis on the way, we need to restock on water before we cross the desert."

"Got it, don't push yourself too hard Mitsuki."

Kakashi motioned for Naruto's clone to hand Sakura to him, it did so and dispelled. Kakashi slung Sakura over his shoulder like a burlap sack and jumped into the trees with Naruto close behind.

Naruto worriedly looked at Kakashi as the three of them darted through the trees. "Where's the rest of the team?"

Kakashi answered without looking back. "The person who attacked us back there was Itachi Uchiha, he used Tsukuyomi on them, so they won't be helping us out this mission. I made shadow clones to take them back to Konoha."

Naruto groaned. "Dammit if this goes any further south, we'll have traveled around the world!"

Kakashi shrugged. "It _could _be worse you know."

Naruto frowned at his teacher. "You're gonna jinx us!"

(AN: Tsukuyomi is hax, so I'm nerfing it a bit. The way it should work is, those with a fully evolved Sharingan are resistant to falling under its control, and those posessing a mangekyo are completely immune as long as their mangekyo is activated.)

* * *

Kankuro paced back and forth while he stood at the field HQ of Suna's ninja forces. He stared at the caves off in the distance and hastily turned to the commanding officer of the rescue mission.

"Oi, Baki-sensei. How do you even know if she's still alive huh?"

The man handed a pair of binoculars to Kankuro and spoke in an even and collected tone. "Kankuro, I know you feel anxious, but we're ready to blast the catacombs into rubble if they kill her. We have sensor types monitoring her chakra signature, if it disappears, she's dead, and we'll cave the catacombs in on their heads. We're in a stalemate, and unfortunately, our only way out is for Naruto Uzumaki to arrive. His team should be here before sundown if they're moving quickly enough."

Kankuro sighed. "I just hope you understand, that's my baby-sister in there."

The man received a clipboard from one of his subordinates and put his hand on Kankuro's shoulder in assurance. "…Of course. If it makes you feel better, you've been granted access to Post Sigma, the assault team is on standby there, feel free to join them in their operation as you see fit. However, I'd specifically advise against engaging Sasori. He's capable of turning enemy puppets against their users."

Kankuro bowed and left the general to his work, he muttered beneath his breath as he walked through the command post. "He could've just told me I had to leave... Dammit, so I'd be completely useless in a fight against these guys!"

Kankuro removed one of the scrolls from his back and unsealed Karasu. He did an ammo count of his poison darts, bombs, and smoke pellets. He'd used about half of his stock in the battle with Gaara-chan's Akatsuki kidnappers. His scroll with his spare ammunition was damaged by that blonde prick with the bombs, so reloading before going in was out of the question, and scavenging through the tower for anything would be difficult with all the damage inflicted in the battle that night. Kankuro grunted and re-sealed Karasu, he started into a jog so he could get to Post Sigma ASAP.

"Naruto, you'd better get here fast!"

* * *

Finally, something was happening. Sasuke and Kabuto repositioned along the ceiling to get a better vantage point. Sasori had summoned a couple of puppets, they appeared to draw a seal on the ground around Gaara, Kabuto readied his tracking seal so that he could apply it when the ritual started.

"Deidara. When is the Konoha Jinchuuriki supposed to be getting here?"

Deidara fiddled with his eyepiece. "Bossman has it planned out to about an hour and a half from now… Coded message says Kisame hit the timetable perfectly, hm?"

"90 minutes… Why must we always lie in wait? Akatsuki needs more initiative, if only things could move in a more timely manner."

Deidara started to juggle some bombs. "Oh come on Sasori! Why're you in such a damn hurry, hm?"

"Perhaps it's because I'm a reflection of my art, _I have a purpose,_ therefore, I prefer to get things done in a timely fashion."

Deidara rolled his visible eye. "Fuuuuck… Sasori… this again? We'll never see eye to eye on this, hm?"

"True." The Intimidating scorpion man carefully lifted Gaara with his tail and gingerly placed her more toward the center of the seal. He looked at the young girl mumble the words 'naruto save me' to herself. "Such a shame that young potential such as hers must be sacrificed for the greater good."

Deidara looked at Sasori grinned. "What's that proverb? You can't make an omelet without breakin' eggs right? ... I'd never pictured you gettin' all sentimental over anything except your puppets, hm?"

Sasori clicked and clacked. "I grow tired of seeing people lose loved ones in conflict and war, that's why I joined Akatsuki, to eliminate it... When is Pein going to initiate the ritual?"

Deidara chirped in reply. "He said he'd contact us whenever hm? …_ Except for that arrogant prick Itachi._ He's exempt from this bullshit! Kisame **_still_** has to do it even though he had to distract Uzumaki for a while hm? This shit's such a bore!"

Sasuke twitched at the mention of his brother's name, and was slightly disappointed that he apparently wasn't anywhere nearby.

Sasori clicked and looked at the ceiling. "… Not anymore… it seems we have some visitors Deidara…"

Deidara looked up and his exposed eye met with Kabuto's, he reached into his satchel and purred. "Cooooool…"

* * *

_**Ch.28 1**__**st**__** Anniversary Author's Note**__**: Special Announcement**_

Yeah, I know this one was on the short side, but… This is the main event

_**Surprise Surprise**_, I'm taking a poll for a new tie-in to The Orange Flash. It'll follow Naruto (durinig Part I/the training trip) and we'll also see a little bit of Mitsuki (at the tail-end of her ANBU career), but for the most part, we'll be with Naruto. It'll be much shorter as a whole than Orange Flash, and I'll probably skip over anything that doesn't directly concern Naruto. This spinoff is more to paint a picture of the events that preceded The Orange Flash.

For now, its name is "Prologue Orange", and I'd consider it a _dramedy_ (Drama/Comedy), there will also be a tiny bit of action, but not as much as Orange Flash. There also won't be much in the way of pairings except _**NarutoXFemHaku**_, and also _**bit**_ of romantic foreshadowing with the other characters that appear later in Orange Flash. Anyway, I have several ideas concerning how I'll portray Naruto, and I want second opinions. This isn't exactly a vote to decide, as I might possibly even choose the selection with the least votes, so don't get _**too**_ invested in your choice, I'm just bouncing ideas off of you all at this point, as any one of these choices could make for a fun spinoff. After you read these, check the top of my profile for the poll.

"_**Strong Idiot" Naruto**_: This Naruto isn't "_stupid_" per se, he just functions on the idea that; **"If it doesn't work, you didn't hit it hard enough."** Naruto's the strongest genin in the class, at least tied with Sasuke. Normally, this would have him put on another team for balancing purposes, but he's assigned to Team 7 because his high grades concerning his physical abilities don't average well with his abysmal grades in the more mental intensive categories (i.e. espionage, stealth, strategy, etc.) Hilarity ensues as Kakashi constantly tries and fails to teach Naruto the importance of finesse in shinobi life (i.e. that being a walking hammer doesn't make all of your problems nails). This version of Naruto will gradually balance out his skill over the course of the story, this way, he'll be more in line with his older-self in the main story.

"_**Two-Face" Naruto:**_ This version of Naruto _**isn't**_ dark, hyper intelligent, or brooding _(leave that shit to Sasuke… or Batman… __**Dark!Naruto is ridiculous. Stop it.**__)_, this version merely has two distinct sides, happy go-lucky, and listless solitude. Kishimoto mentions it, but doesn't elaborate on such an important piece of Naruto as a character. I'll delve into his loneliness a bit more in this incarnation; Team 7 (except Kakashi) will generally hate his guts until they understand how truly damaged Naruto is as a person. For this Naruto, his complex nature is what sows the initial seeds of Sakura's attraction to him. His transition to the Naruto we see in Orange Flash will happen during the training trip as he learns to discard his mask and show the underneath (i.e. a matter of fake smiles vs. real ones).

"_**Hokage or Bust" Naruto:**_ This potential portrayal will make Naruto more of the _"Pampered Orphan" _variety, a la Young Bruce Wayne. In my canon, Kakashi, Jiraiya, and the 3rd Hokage are much bigger parts of Naruto's early life, and in this portrayal _specifically_; they're actively grooming him to be the Hokage one day. He'll still be a hyperactive prankster, but he'll also be a bit more goal oriented, even going so far as to blow off a _mildly_ interested Sakura to train or learn about the previous Kage. His relationship with Sakura will grow more complex in order to bring him in line with his Orange Flash incarnation, because this Naruto will be more of a loner.

_**Delinquent Naruto: **_This version is as close as I'll go to _Dark!_Naruto. He's brash, chirpy, confrontational, and **violently** temperamental. The entire class, save for Sasuke and Hinata is scared shitless of him. I believe Naruto has every right to be angry at the world, even in my canon with Kakashi, Jiraiya, and the 3rd Hokage as his surrogate family. While Naruto has been adequately provided for in my canon, his guardians still keep him in the dark, and by extension, at a distance. Because he can't know the truth of his lineage quite yet, and due to the fact that Naruto's guardians all had close relationships with his parents, Naruto has no one to talk to... he's just frustrated. His experience with Haku and Zabuza will mellow him out so that he gradually becomes more in sync with his personality in Orange flash.

Thanks for all the support, and also don't forget to share, review, follow, and/or favorite this story. I prefer reviews the most though, they help me improve my writing, and better writing means cooler stories. Thanks, again, and don't forget to vote. I'll be back with a standard length chapter real soon.

~Breath of the Wiz

_Signin' Off_


	29. Chapter 29: Concussions and Big Butts

_**AN**_: Sorry I took so long, but I hit a creative wall for a while, I was busy drafting different outcomes of Team 7's inevitable reunion, and after a bunch of tweaking I finally got it to make sense and not be some punk-ass character bashing extravaganza. Chapter 30 is coming to da interwebz near you very soon (for real this time, I'm actually halfway done with ch.30). Also, if you haven't already voted for what kind of Naruto will be in _Prologue Orange,_ go do that real quick if you already understand what each archetype means, if you don't, read the AN at the bottom. btw The poll is at the top of my profile. I've started work Prologue Orange, but I still want more input from you all. Anyway… readers? It's time to dive in!

* * *

Naruto, Kakashi, and a now fully-moblie and alert Sakura were sitting on a nearly horizontal palm tree. Sakura delicately worked on Naruto's cuts and scratches, and while he looked a bit drained, it was obvious that she was the worse off of the two.

Sakura began to wonder just how tough Naruto actually was, even after everything they'd been through in the past few hours, he still appeared as if he were ready to drop right back into a fight with Kisame if need be.

After Sakura finished her checkup on Naruto, she asked about his condition. "Naruto, how do you feel? I can tell that you have some sort of damage to your nervous system from using too much demonic chakra."

Naruto grinned, flexing his arms and beating his chest a few times. "I'll be back to normal in a couple hours or so. The fox said he'd take care of it."

Sakura sighed and gave Naruto a worried stare. "Are you sure that's a-… What's up with your eyes?"

Kakashi raised an eyebrow and turned to Naruto to get a look, Jiraiya had told him that the Kyuubi influence on Naruto's body had drastically increased when he loosened the seal. The Copycat Ninja was instructed to watch out for any changes in Naruto's body or personality.

Kakashi narrowed his eye when he reached Sakura's side. Naruto's eyes were blue once more, but now, the pupils appeared as slits, just like the fox's eyes.

"Naruto. What do you see? Anything new?"

"…My eyes are fine Kakashi-sensei."

Kakashi shrugged and pointed to the small pond in the center of the oasis. "Take a look then."

Naruto slid off the tree trunk and hustled over to the pond. His reflection startled him somewhat, not only had his eyes changed, but also, his teeth and whisker marks were slightly more pronounced, not that anyone but himself would notice though.

'_The fuck?'_

'_**I dunno, I kinda like it.'**_

'_Oh piss off! What'd you do?'_

'_**Nothing. Perhaps separating your chakra with my own has temporarily caused a chakra imbalance in your seal. It's likely your body is making adaptations to handle more of my chakra the next time you overuse my chakra. It may get even more pronounced when my chakra eventually leaks back into your system… Don't quote me on that, I'm no seal expert.'**_

'_Dammit I don't have time for this crap! Can you keep an eye on this for me?'_

'_**Yeah sure, whatever. I'll get back to you with my findings when I feel like it.'**_

'_Oh come on!'_

Naruto remained crouched by the water but turned his head. "The fox doesn't know exactly what's happening to me but he said he'd figure it out."

Sakura raised an eyebrow. "_He_? What, does he like long walks on top of populated areas, bushy tails on his vixens? Does he like his eggs scrambled as opposed to fried?"

Naruto grinned back and answered Sakura's snark with some overt flirting. "Maybe. I _do _know that he thinks you're pretty and that I should mate with you."

Sakura blushed a tiny bit and sighed at Naruto's antics, after which, she pulled out her canteen and chugged it in order to muffle the nervous squeak that threatened to escape her mouth. "Yeah, whatever Prettyboy."

Naruto gave her an unreadable stare before smiling at her once more. "_That's what they call me!"_

Just then, Shikamaru and Mitsuki broke the horizon, he had her on his back, and from what the group could see, Mitsuki appeared to be stuffing her face into a small bag.

Naruto sighed in relief when he saw a vomiting, but very much alive Mitsuki and Shikamaru. He disappeared in a flash of Orange light, and a few seconds later, the blonde teen reappeared with a disoriented Shikamaru and Mitsuki in tow.

Sakura growled and stomped over to a confused and terrified Naruto. With one hand, she lifted Naruto about a foot into the air by the front of his flak jacket. Sakura cracked the knuckles on her free hand by squeezing her fist in front of his face.

She gave him a disturbingly sweet smile and spoke to him in a sweet tone of voice. _"Naruto-kun? Would you kindly stop using that jutsu until I can figure out what you've done to your chakra coils?"_

Naruto's teeth chattered and he hid his face behind his hands. "Y-yeah! Sure! Whatever ya say Sakura-chan!"

With that, Sakura dropped Naruto on his feet and took Mitsuki from Shikamaru, she took the raven-haired kunoichi over to the edge of the water and gently set her down.

Shikamaru turned to Kakashi and pointed off to a spot in the shade. "Let's gameplan. If we rest for an hour, we can get to Sunagakure before the sun goes down. Marching ASAP will only get us killed."

Kakashi nodded, but before walking off, he turned to Naruto. "Don't forget to fill up your canteen."

"I'm good, I already filled up on water." Naruto turned and stared off at the horizon, as much as he wanted to sprint off in Gaara's direction on his own, he knew that was exactly what the Akatsuki wanted him to do.

* * *

Sakura had confirmed that Mitsuki had a mild concussion, the effects of which were made worse by the delay in treatment. Along with that, she was dehydrated and quite a bit delirious… a fact made obvious by the absence of her trademark levels of restraint and wit... She seemed … _airheaded_.

"Oh, good afternoon Sakura-san... Why are we in a desert? I could've sworn I knew what I was doing out here just a while ago, but the past day is a bit fuzzy now."

"Mitsuki-san, please, hold still."

"Oh... That hurts a bit."

"A bit? This gash on your head is _a lot_ more than a bit, how're you still conscious? … I'm _so _sorry, this is my fault."

Mitsuki stared up at Sakura. "Sorry about what? … It won't scar will it?"

Sakura nodded. "Sadly, it will, but your hair will cover it so it won't matter in the long run. You're really tough, you know that?"

Mitsuki stared at Sakura in blank delirium. "I actually have a plate in my head from when Suna attacked Konoha during the Chuunin Exams… So did you hit me or something?"

Sakura shook her head. "_Not exactly_. I… never mind, you probably won't remember any of this conversation anyway."

Mitsuki ignored the medic-nin, the ditzy tone of her voice made Sakura feel deeply sorry for inadvertently doing this to her teammate. _"I'm a bit tired Sakura. I suppose I'll just sleep this headache off... Would you happen to have any sake with you?"_

Sakura hastily snapped her fingers over Mitsuki's eyes. "No. Hey… What do those clouds look like to you?"

Mitsuki's glazed over eyes focused on the sky and her lips slowly upturned. "That one reminds me of Uzumaki-sama's abs, don't you wanna lick them? … I do... a lot... right now."

She tried to sit up, but Sakura pinned her back to he ground.

The medic's face began to match her hair. "-oh- … Well, I guess that works… a-as long as you stay awake. What other clouds do you see?"

Mitsuki looked back up to the sky. "_That one looks like my bow... _and that one looks like my brother's war horse."

"Good, good, keep picking out clouds."

Sakura went to her backpack and put on the cloak Kakashi had advised her to buy, she also pulled out a scroll with ice packs in it. She retrieved one from the scroll and turned around, only to be startled by the stare of Mitsuki's glowing eyes.

"Sakura? May I have your butt?"

Sakura recoiled in confusion. "Eh?! Excuse me?"

Mitsuki obliviously continued. "It comes out _really_ far and it's _so wide_, but no jiggle… It's all muscle, isn't it?… How'd you get it to be so big? If I had even half as much to work with as you do, I'd-"

Sakura clambered over to Mitsuki and covered the lady's mouth with her hands; she gave Naruto a reassuring smile when her sudden movement caught his attention. He stared for a second and went back to slee- wait… _meditating_ beneath the palm tree.

Sakura sighed in relief and continued tending to Mitsuki, who continued her delirious rambling.

Despite her concussion, Mitsuki was still very coordinated, she firmly grabbed Sakura's wrist and spun her around. "Can I at least squeeze it? I need a benchmark to work toward. I should compare... _-my head hurts-_"

Sakura nonchalantly did a backwards handspring to break Mitsuki's grip, "I hate treating concussions." she muttered to herself in mid-air.

This course of action now meant that Sakura had landed on Mitsuki's left side, the medic's back was now to the freshwater pond.

Mitsuki continued to stare up at Sakura. "Hey, Sakura-san, how have you _not_ snatched Uzumaki-sama up yet? You have the closest relationship with him, _and_ you have that butt of yours… If you don't get to work soon, Anko-senpai's gonna get to him… If_ I _don't get to work soon, _I'm_ gonna lose out to Anko-senpai. I should go flirt with him..."

Sakura absentmindedly pinned Mitsuki back to the ground. "Anko? … _I may never get this chance again_… Mitsuki-san, you went with Naruto on his last mission didn't you? What changed him so much over just a few days?"

Mitsuki started to laugh. "Oh that? Anko took him out into the woods, and according to her description, they had some destructive landscape-altering sex or something... Judging from her demeanor, apparently Uzumaki-sama was waybeyond her expectations, that's always a pleasant surprise when you're dealing with virgins... Speaking of which, could you tell him that I'm going to have sex with him the first chance I get? I need to catch up with Anko-senpai. _I hope you don't mind too much_... _What am I saying?_ I don't care how you feel about what I do with Uzumaki-sama!" Mitsuki began to chuckle quietly.

Sakura was still reeling from this new information so she failed to process the second half of Mitsuki's rambling. "…_Catch… up?"_

Mitsuki recomposed herself and did an obscene gesture with her hands. "They've gotten cozy with each other at least twice _as far as **I** know_. But knowing Anko-senpai, they've probably done it seven or even _eight_ times at this point... I only watched the second time they did it, and my oh my, _I'd like my turn_… Really, the only reason they're not an item yet is because Naruto thinks all of us deserve a shot as well… Do you hear that ringing sound or is that just me?"

Sakura had once again stopped listening to Mitsuki's concussion induced babbling halfway through. Her face was neon red as she blankly stared at Naruto as he slept… or meditated beneath that palm tree; everything that had happened over the past several days was starting to add up in her mind.

Her thousand-yard-stare went from Naruto's face, to the desert's horizon.

'_I'm losing him… I'm losing him and he's right here, waiting for me... Just within reach.'_

"_**SHANNARO! Then let's go get'im now!"**_

'_Then what happens if Sasuke shows up again? What do I do then? How is __**any**__ of this fair to Naruto?! If I can't confirm the nature of my feelings for Sasuke, I can't move forward with any of this circus I call my ninja career! Why don't you tell me what to do little voice?! You're usually so talkative!"_

It felt strange, for once, said voice inside Sakura's head fell silent. No snappy reply, no gutsy boast. No cattines… Just silence.

Sakura's romantic crisis was interrupted by Mitsuki's airheaded tone of voice.

"… So, can I get a butt transplant from you at some point? Uzumaki-sama would love it. Plus, I'd look better in a cocktail dress... I wanna see you in a cocktail dress Sakura, give me the motivation I need!"

Mitsuki futilely tried to spin Sakura around again, but to no avail.

Sakura's brow twitched as a vein appeared on her ample forhead. "Drink your water Mitsuki."

Her shimmering green eyes rolled and she fired back. "Yes _**Mother. **_I'll eat my veggies too, I promise!**" **Mitsuki comically struggled to guide her canteen to her mouth.

"Sakura-san, can you help me with this? The ground won't stop moving."

Sakura sighed… loudly.

* * *

Tsunade was snapped from her afternoon drink when she heard a low, yet powerful knock on the door. She smiled a bit when she realized who would soon step through her door.

She downed her cup of Sake and gave an excited, "Come in!"

The door creaked open, and a big pair of white eyes poked into the room. "Good afternoon, Hokage-sama. I humbly request an audience with you… at your leisure of course."

Tsunade chuckled and ushered the little girl into the room. "Hanabi-chan! Have a seat! … _This isn't about lube this time, is it_?"

The girl, with her perpetually blank expression, shook her head. She scuttled into the room and climbed into the seat at Tsunade's desk. The Hokage locked her fingers and leaned forward, a cue for Hanabi to begin talking.

The young girl blurted out yet another outlandish request. "I desire your assistance in acquiring the affections of Naruto Uzumaki."

Tsunade pinched Hanabi's cheeks and started gushing, the little girl stared blankly while Tsunade enthusiastically ran over to a picture on the wall and flipped it around, she fiddled with the text on it for a while, and after composing herself, she sat back down at her desk.

Tsunade thought for a second and then leaned forward raising an eyebrow. "_The lube was for Naruto then_?"

Hanabi shook her head. "Technically, it was, but unfortunately, that plan never came to fruition. I wish to bear his children and save my clan from genetic stagnation… Ideally, I would prefer to have Uzumaki-san to myself, but a simple sperm donation would be… _tolerable_."

There was a truckload of contempt in Hanabi's last word, if not for her Hyuga breeding and disposition, she likely would have spat.

Tsunade's face went blank as she stared at the little girl; this blankness suddenly contorted into a smile when she realized the girl was completely serious. Tsunade kicked back in her chair and took another drag of sake, baiting the girl for more information.

"_I don't know_... You're not the first one to feel that way about him… but you _were_ the first one to come to me without any ulterior motives stuffed into your back pocket."

Tsunade's thoughts temporarily drifted to the political ramifications of Naruto and Gaara's union.

"In light of that, I'll indulge your request… I'd suggest finding a way to maintain close contact with him. Get that outta the way and-"

Hanabi held up her hand as she interrupted the Hokage. "I apologize for interrupting, but I have preemptively arranged such an agreement with him. He owes me a long-term favor that ensures such contact with him."

Tsunade took note of this and suddenly began taking the little girl more seriously. "That's interesting Hanabi-chan. Might I ask the nature of your agreement with him?"

"I simply coerced him into a promise of sorts. He must take me anywhere I wish at my leisure, Uzumaki-san is a steadfast individual, so the chances of him reneging on our agreement is highly unlikely."

Tsunade started to laugh at the thought of Naruto backing himself into this situation. "_Coerced? _That's ninja-speak for 'tricked', or 'blackmailed'."

"You may perceive it as you wish Hokage-sama, but there is no doubt in my mind that he will put forth a concerted effort to uphold his end of the agreement, as I did mine."

Tsunade grinned and pinched Hanabi's cheek, the little girl didn't emote in response. "You're something else Hanabi-chan! You'll make a fine kunoichi one day."

Up until this point, Tsunade's morning had been terrible; Shizune hid her bottle of sake, forcing her to break out the spare. Then, to make matters worse, the Kazekage had been taken hostage, with Naruto being the price of ransom. If she did nothing, the alliance with Suna would be severely jeopardized, if she sent Naruto, they ran the risk of Akatsuki getting both the Shukaku and the Kyuubi. Also, because Tsunade tended to be Fate's bitch, that reckless oaf Jiraiya, just _had_ to go digging around for leads on the Akatsuki leader in Kusagakure. If his hunch happened to be correct, the ensuing confrontation would likely be fatal. At least this little exchange took some of the edge off of Tsunade's stressful day.

The Hokage leaned forward. "So, since you've got a means of communication, how do you think he perceives you?"

Hanabi's face took to a slightly discouraged frown. "He thinks me too young to seriously consider as an option."

Tsunade sighed in relief and laughed a bit. "Ha! That's nothing! Naruto's a simple boy, if you can show him how much you care; he'll be eating out of the palm of your hand. Just… _whatever you do_, avoid playing with his emotions, that's the only thing I've seen that truly angers him."

Hanabi nodded and thought to herself for a moment, Tsunade spoke again after a short stint of silence. "Hanabi-chan? You know, if your father hears about your visits here, I'll never hear the end of it."

"I am quite aware of that Hokage-sama, but I have acquired information concerning that exact issue. My father made an unscheduled departure from the Hyuuga compound recently, so I followed him... He went to the Uzumaki Ambassador's Mansion..."

Hanabi paused, so Tsunade raised an eyebrow. "… You're just a step ahead of _everyone_, aren't you? …Go on."

"I requested the reasoning of such a visit to Uzumaki-san's bodyguard. Based on her body language, vocal intonations, select wording, and facial expressions, Outou-sama's visit was most likely made with the purpose of discussing my claim on Naruto Uzumaki. I can say with 85 percent certainty, that he will approve of my desire to be his bride."

Tsunade's eyes widened slightly. "Okay then… well… now you should focus on improving your relationship with him, but you've already got that set up so here's a little something that's more directly applicable… Naruto responds well to transparency of intentions. When you drag him out, tell him _exactly _why you're doing the things you do… I'd probably mention the whole kids thing last and lead with the disadvantageous nature of your situation. Just, whatever you do, make sure you're telling the truth."

Hanabi nodded and a tiny smirk slithered across her face. "I thank you for your input Hokage-sama, I anticipate our next consultation."

"Me too Hanabi-chan."

Hanabi ceased the swinging of her feet and slid off of the chair, bowing to the Hokage. Tsunade pinched her other cheek this time and handed her an ice cream bar, the girl enthusiastically snatched it from the Hokage's grip, _despite_ her perpetually blank expression.

The Hokage waved in excitement as the little girl left her office. "Good luck Hanabi-chan! … _-heh!- _and even _more_ luck to you, Naruto."

* * *

Sasuke and Kabuto dashed through the caverns and catacombs with Sasori's puppets in hot pursuit. They'd left the 4th Kazekage to deal with both Deidara and the brunt of Sasori's puppet army.

Sasuke looked at Kabuto with his crimson eyes. "We could very easily crush these puppets and head back to the main cavern."

Kabuto shook his head and whispered. "Retrieving Sasori and Deidara's bodies is a secondary objective, and even then, we've been ordered to prioritize Sasori's heart core over one of Deidara's hands. For now, let's just focus on applying the seal to the Kazekage before the ritual starts, that's our first priority. In order for us to do that, it's important that Sasori believes that we've fled the cave network, since he saw me with you, my cover is blown. If he hasn't called it in already he will as soon as they're in the clear. By my estimate, the 4th Kazekage should be able to fight them for several hours before they manage to disable him. This will give us plenty of time to both place the seal and reestablish the element of surprise."

Their ears perked up at an increasingly loud clacking noise. Sasuke instinctively activated his Sharingan, he was just in time, as he managed to catch an incoming senbon between his thumb and index finger. Sasuke ran the Chidori through the senbon and tossed the sharp needle back at the puppet. It intercepted another incoming needle headed right between Sasuke's eyes, it flew through both the incoming needle, _and_ the puppet's neck. This decapitated the monstrosity, allowing Sasuke and Kabuto an opening to escape.

They darted throught the network of caves, they were in a maze-like room, the stalagmites created an interlinking labyrinth of confusion. The headless puppet would have flown above to find them, but it was unable to do so due to the low ceiling. This particular part of the cave network reminded Sasuke of the vast catacombs beneath Konoha. He spent a lot of his spare time exploring them when he wasn't training. Snapping his mind from its nostalgia trip, he concentrated on the task at hand. Sasuke heard a faint whistling noise, and without looking, he cocked his head to the side and another poison dart flew past his head.

Sasuke rapidly grew bored of the chase, so he took matters into his own hands. "Kabuto, close your eyes and cover your ears."

Sasuke promptly flipped a flash grenade at their pursuer. The puppet ejected a blade from is forearm and sliced the bomb in half, causing it to explode. The puppet clacked furiously and wildly swung its blades. Sasuke raised an eyebrow, apparently the visual receptors for the puppet weren't actually in the head... a clever design choice. It appeared to scan the tunnel for a few seconds and after pausing for a spell, it chose to keep moving forward. This course of action may have been the most logical assumption if it weren't for the fact that Sasuke and Kabuto were standing right behind the marionette. Shortly after, they started their way back toward the main cavern, hoping that their undead backup would be able to survive long enough for them to slip through Sasori's patrols and place the tracking and disruptor seals correctly.

After about 30 seconds of running, Sasuke stopped and made a shadow clone. He made the familiar hand-sign and it 'poofed' into existence, Sasuke immediately fell to one knee in fatigue. Just making _one_ nearly caused him to pass out from the sudden chakra drain, he wondered to himself how Naruto must have felt when he made hundreds at a time.

Sasuke mentally commanded the shadow clone to transform into a marked kunai, he hid it inside his sleeve as insurance. If Sasuke placed the seal on his transformed Kunai, he could decrease the margin of error for placing the seals drastically. Kabuto smirked when he figured out what Sasuke was planning on doing. He passed the seals to Sasuke and he wrapped it around the blade of the Kunai.

Once they'd started running again, Kabuto whispered. "Just make sure that lands the correct distance from the Kazekage, otherwise, this mission is a wasted effort."

Sasuke nodded and sped up slightly, but immediately skidded to a stop when he heard a clacking noise up ahead. Kabuto used an earth Jutsu to drag Sasuke beneath the dirt floor. Several seconds later, they heard the puppet zoom overhead; they waited a few seconds longer and promptly dug themselves out of the ground.

Sasuke drew his sword and twirled it a few times. "Kabuto. The puppets, what kind of situation are we working with here?"

Kabuto fixed his glasses and recalled an important bit of information from his dossier. "Due to Sasori's body alterations, he does not require line of sight to effectively control his puppets, he sees what they "_see"_… -it's _like a low budget Rinnegan-._"

Sasuke turned to Kabuto in confusion. "Rinnegan? What sort of ability does that doujutsu possess?"

Kabuto opened his mouth to explain, but, as if on cue, one of the puppets came flying in their direction. Sasuke and Kabuto transformed into a bat and lizard respectively, the puppet obliviously rocketed past them. When the coast was clear, they broke transformation.

Sasuke scoffed and rolled a shuriken between his fingers. "I'd have never imagined myself playing hide and seek with the life of a kage in the balance."

Kabuto interrupted the Uchiha's train of thought. "Get used to it, I can hear another one coming from behind us."

Sasuke inwardly groaned. '_This is gonna take a while.'_

* * *

_**AN**_: Thanks for reading everyone. I had a lot of fun writing Concussed!Mitsuki, and also Hanabi-chan being her lil' sneaky self. I also looked back at some things I mentioned in the first few chapters (u know, the awkward days of Orange flash…) As you can see, I'm going to start working on some things like Naruto's physical changes. Anyway, the Suna arc will end in the next few (3-4) chapters, and we'll return to Konoha for some more insanity. Also, if you haven't voted for Prologue Orange yet, go to the top of my profile to find the poll. It's going to be a prequel to Orange flash, the majority of which will be about Naruto and Haku-chan. Below are some possible portrayals of Naruto during his genin days, none of this is set in stone so take it with a grain of salt, and while I've started writing Prologue Orange, I still want to get an idea of your opinions. The current vote count is listed above each possible portrayal. Get your butts 2 mah profile and click somethin'!

_**Poll Stats As of Writing this Chapter:**_

_**You Guys really like "Hokage or Bust"… However, it seems some of you see some potential in a "Super-Strong Idiot" as a protagonist. Keep voting people, chapter 1 of Prologue Orange is closer than you think.**_

**12 Votes**

"_**Hokage or Bust" Naruto:**_ This potential portrayal will make Naruto more of the _"Pampered Orphan" _variety, a la Young Bruce Wayne. In my canon, Kakashi, Jiraiya, and the 3rd Hokage are much bigger parts of Naruto's early life, and in this portrayal _specifically_; they're actively grooming him to be the Hokage one day. He'll still be a hyperactive prankster, but he'll also be a bit more goal oriented, even going so far as to blow off a _mildly_ interested Sakura to train or learn about the previous Kage. His relationship with Sakura will grow more complex in order to bring him in line with his Orange Flash incarnation; the transition wouldn't make sense otherwise because Orange Flash Naruto is in love with Sakura. His doomed relationship with Haku will be his primary source of motivation to be the Hokage, because at first, he'll feel like he was forced onto his path and sort of apathetically walk toward it.

**8 Votes**

"_**Strong Idiot" Naruto**_: This Naruto isn't "_stupid_" per se, he just functions on the idea that; **"If it doesn't work, you didn't hit it hard enough."** What's makes him different from Canon!Naruto, is that he actually has the physical abilities to back up his brutish approach to life. Naruto's the strongest genin in the class, tied with Sasuke. Normally, this would have him put on another team for balancing purposes, but he's assigned to Team 7 because his high grades concerning his physical abilities don't average well with his abysmal grades in the more mental intensive categories (i.e. espionage, stealth, strategy, etc.) Hilarity ensues as Kakashi constantly tries and fails to teach Naruto the importance of finesse in shinobi life (i.e. that being a walking hammer doesn't make all of your problems nails). This version of Naruto will gradually balance out his skill set over the course of the story, this way, he'll be more in line with his older-self in the main story. Haku's death will cause him to reevaluate his approach to shinobi life, this forces him to place more emphasis on using his mind, as he'll feel that he could have saved Haku where he a more well-rounded ninja.

**4 Votes**

"_**Two-Face" Naruto: **_This version of Naruto _**isn't**_ dark, hyper intelligent, or brooding _(leave that shit to Sasuke… or Batman… __**Dark!Naruto is ridiculous. Stop it.**__)_, this version merely has two distinct sides, happy go-lucky, and listless solitude. Kishimoto mentions it, but doesn't elaborate on such an important piece of Naruto as a character. I'll delve into his loneliness a bit more in this incarnation; Team 7 (except Kakashi) will generally hate his guts until they understand how truly damaged Naruto is as a person. For this Naruto, his complex nature is what sows the initial seeds of Sakura's attraction to him. His transition to the Naruto we see in Orange Flash will happen during the training trip as he learns to discard his mask and show the underneath (i.e. a matter of fake smiles vs. real ones).

**4 Votes**

_**Delinquent Naruto: **_ This version is as close as I'll go to _Dark!_Naruto. He's brash, chirpy, confrontational, and **violently** temperamental. The entire class, save for Sasuke and Hinata is scared shitless of him. I believe Naruto has every right to be angry at the world, even in my canon with Kakashi, Jiraiya, and the 3rd Hokage as his surrogate family. While Naruto has been adequately provided for in my canon, his guardians still keep him in the dark, and by extension, at a distance. Because he can't know the truth of his lineage quite yet, and due to the fact that Naruto's guardians all had close relationships with his parents, Naruto has no one to talk to... he's just frustrated. His experience with Haku and Zabuza will mellow him out so that he gradually becomes more in sync with his personality in Orange flash.


	30. Chapter 30: Kitsune Kaminari

AN: I'm gearing up for a showdown, so right now; I have to put all the pieces in place. I've also got some new characters stepping into the fray, so there's something to get excited for. Also, I changed the cover image of the story, Mitsuki and Gaara are in the upper left and right respectively. My username on D.e.v.i.a.n.t.a.r.t. is the same as on this site, only with hyphens instead of spaces. You can find it there._ Take a look if you want to get a better picture of Gaara-chan and most importantly, Mitsuki Tachibana._

* * *

Naruto carried Mitsuki on his back as they walked through the desert. He had fashioned his orange sash belt into a hood for himself, while Mitsuki had on a cloak of her own. As far as Naruto was concerned, this was the easy part of the mission, this would be the last stretch of time he would have with himself, as once they reached Sunagakure's Blockade, it would be all business from there.

The searing winds made Naruto's eyes water, it felt as if he were staring into an opening oven or kiln. Mitsuki had fallen silent about an hour ago, but it also didn't help that whenever she said something, it was always an erection-inducing comment or an errant nibble on the ear. Sakura stared at the two ninja in annoyance, and of course, jealousy. She'd never say that aloud of course. Kakashi and Shikamaru Nara could of course, _care less_, but the barren landscape offered no vistas to hold a traveler's attention.

The five-cloaked figures bantered and jested despite the dire situation they were gearing up to face. This practice among the ninja of Konoha was not born of a lack of professionalism, no, it was more of a defense mechanism than anything. Even among the ANBU, there were always attempts to diffuse what little tension they could, tense ninja made mistakes, and any sort of major one at this point would spell tragedy.

Naruto had been thinking ever since they left Anju Oasis, and after piecing his question together he voiced his concerns to Shikamaru.

"Oi, Shikamaru. I never really thought about it, but what's stopping them from just extracting the Shukaku from Gaara? Why do they need _me_?"

Shikamaru immediately replied. "I've been thinking about that since we left. Remember, they've been cornered; this makes for one of two possibilities. Best case scenario; they're trying to buy time for some sort of trump card to come through. The other, more disturbing possibility; they may have come up with a way to escape the blockade with both you and the Kazekage in tow. It's really the perfect move, they've got a way to achieve, at minimum, one of their goals regardless of what we do. We're gonna need some sort of miracle to come out of this without any sort of casualties."

Naruto smirked and punched his fist to his palm.

"Miracles're my specialty, dattebayo!"

Kakashi added in his two cents. "Well Naruto, we're gonna need one, if Akatsuki hasn't sent any other operatives to extract Deidara and Sasori, that second possibility is the more likely of the two. I'd bet on my life that they've got an ace in the hole, they're just waiting for the right moment to drop the hammer."

Naruto growled in anticipation. "Then I hope you two are wrong."

Kakashi's eye swiveled to Naruto. "Me too."

* * *

Deidara and Sasori stood over the dissolving body of the 4th Kazekage. While they miraculously managed to come out of the battle unscathed, Deidara had used nearly two thirds of the explosive clay he'd brought with him. The undead kage managed to keep them occupied for nearly three hours before they had managed to overwhelm him with sheer force.

Deidara cursed the deceased man. "I can't believe a goddamned corpse wasted this much of our time!"

Sasori would have rolled his eyes if he hadn't predicted Deidara's reaction. "Deidara, we _should _be worried about the other two, one of which appeared to be one of my agents."

Deidara angrily kicked a stalagmite and it exploded into a shower of pebbles. "Who gives a shit? They ran off as soon as we saw them! This prick made me waste more than half my ammo!"

Deidara punctuated his curse by kicking and scattering the pile of black sand that was once the 4th Kazekage's body.

Sasori crossed his arms. "My patrols have combed this entire cave network several times over. They've likely fled, since the only other place they could be, is in this very room... _Unlikely_… Scan the area just to be safe; tell me what you see with that eye of yours?"

Deidara's mechanical eye lit up and he looked toward the ceiling and walls. "Nothin' suspicious on the heat scope, chakra sensor's clean as well. I'm pretty damned sure they left when we saw'em."

Sasori went over to Gaara to check if their battle had injured her, lucky for them, she was in perfect health (relatively speaking of course). He also checked the seal etched into the ground around the jinchuuriki, and while it did suffer damage, it wasn't enough for him to bother his puppets to re-draw, notably; the seal seemed to be littered with hundreds of Kunai from the battle. He scraped his scorpion-tail on a spot next to Gaara and re-drew some symbols.

The raspy-voiced-puppet then addressed his partner without turning to face him. "Deidara, you should call this in, we may have to move forward with one of the contingency plans."

His partner grunted and nodded, he pressed a button on his eyepiece and spoke in his usual informal tone. "Hey bossman, we hit a snag. It looks to me like that Snake Bastard made his move, however, we managed to salvage the situation hm? We're ready for the ritual…"

There was a pause as the blonde man listened to his earpiece. Then, Deidara gave Sasori a thumbs up. "Cool, we'll get on it. Oi, Sasori. we're cuttin' our losses… Let's get the Shukaku extracted. Have those marionettes of yours block off all the entrances for us."

Sasori flicked his tail slightly, and his army of puppets came tearing through the main cavern at a frantic pace and scattered off in different directions.

Sasori clicked and clacked. "Hn, what a wasted opportunity... Deidara, stand on that symbol over there."

"Sure whatever."

Had Deidara been more diligent in his scanning, he'd have noticed the fact that the dirt patch beneath Gaara seemed to be giving off notably more heat and chakra than it should have...

* * *

Anko nonchalantly flipped through her bingo book while she restrained the team's target… and by restrained, I mean that she was literally standing on the side of the man's skull, both of her feet were forcing his head into the dirt. Anko was currently filling in for Kurenai on Team 8; who apparently had been vomiting all morning.

Anko mused to herself on the possible reasons for such a sudden onset of sickness from the otherwise invincible woman. _'Hah! I'll bet that idiot Sarutobi knocked her up!'_

They were in a small clearing in the forest, located somewhere along the border of Fire Country. One could even hear the rushing water close by; it reminded Anko of her first night with Naruto in the forest and the ensuing conversation they had shared concerning Naruto's inability to comprehend being loved. Even with her mind simultaneously in the gutter and above the clouds, she went on with her preliminary inquiry.

Even so, she really only spoke to him when she needed to confirm the identities of his alleged cohorts in whatever it was he did.

Anko crouched and showed him a headshot. "This one of your buddies?"

He struggled beneath the weight of Anko's entire body on his skull. "Y-yeah! What of it?"

Visibly bored, she continued with her interrogation. "Was he with you at this listed time and date?"

She placed the scrap of paper in front of the man's eyes.

The man squirmed. "No! What's Konoha want with me, huh? I'm not a threat to you guys!"

Anko flipped through more pages. "Well, ya are. Whether or not you know it, you've been feeding our force deployments and supply cache locations to an S-Class nuke-nin organization called Akatsuki. Now, you can either answer all of our questions here, or be more thoroughly interrogated by _Ibiki Morino. _That's a pretty easy decision if you ask me."

The man pleaded. "Fine! Fine! I'll tell you everything… as long as you get off my head!"

Anko started scribbling notes in her bingo book. "Good, good, but not to me. Kiba, Shino!"

The man's eyes widened in fear when he saw the Inuzuka boy whistle at his dog. The trembling man's eyes swiveled around and in his peripheral vision; he could see the gigantic canine feasting on the corpse of one of his ninja bodyguards. The dog ceased chewing on the dead kunoichi's skull and sauntered over to its master. He could see the boy whisper to it and it promptly came over and sat down on his back, he shuddered at the bloody drool leaking from Akamaru's mouth. This prompted Anko to get off of the man's head, he sighed in relief at the decrease in pressure on his skull, but now he had a hungry wolf/dog thing on his back, one that could apparently crush his skull with a well placed chomp.

Kiba grinned at the man; the boy's own fangs made the guy feel even more nervous. "Don't worry man, no sudden moves and you should be fine… Well, _**probably**_. Akamaru I mean it, you _**can't**__ eat this one._"

Anko crouched down next to the man and pointed to Shino. "Tell your story to this guy right here, and don't bother lying, he can tell if your heartbeat fluctuates, those bugs of his are something else."

Shino silently walked over and stared downward. "Talk. We have other things to do today."

Kiba grinned at his teammate. "Ah really? Didn't know ya had a life Shino."

The man's fearful expression reflected off of Shino's shades. "Quiet Kiba… I'm working."

Anko left the poor man to his cruel fate; an interrogation by Shino Aburame, she smirked and mused to herself about recommending the bug boy to train under Ibiki Morino for a bit, but her musings were cut short when her gaze landed on Hinata. Anko had ordered her to stand watch with her Byakugan.

Anko approached from behind Hinata and smirked. "Sooooo."

Hinata smiled a bit, but didn't turn around. "What is it Anko-senpai?"

Anko grinned and leaned against a tree. "Sorry, I'm not used to speaking to the back of someone's head."

Hinata flushed a bit, and hurriedly spun around to face the Jonin. "Oh! I'm sorry! Sometimes I forget whether or not I'm facing someone while my Byakugan is activated!"

The Hyuga heiress punctuated her apology with a bow.

Anko smirked. "All manners and protocol with you, huh? … How was your date with _Naru-chan_?"

Hinata straightened her spine a bit. "How do you even-? Nevermind… In hindsight, I wouldn't be surprised if everyone in Konoha knew at this point… It went fine if you really must know."

The younger of the two women suddenly became suspicious, Hinata's eyes narrowed at Anko's pet name for her crush. "Ano… _Naru-chan? _… Why do you ask Anko-senpai?"

Anko did a few stretches and answered in her usual nonchalant tone. "Just gauging my competition, that's all."

Hinata started to worry. "C-competition?"

Anko nodded and touched her toes. "That's right princess. I'm going to have sex with Naruto as soon as I get back… for the… hmmm…" Anko dramatically counted off on her fingers. "THIRD TIME NOW!"

Hinata's eyes widened and her face went red. "_S-sex, with Naruto? …_" she was so thrown off her game that her Byakugan deactivated. The girl stumbled a bit as she began to faint, but she snapped herself awake before she lost balance.

Hinata was still red, but she was obviously annoyed with her Jonin Commander. "Y-you stay away from him! Why can't you date someone your own age?!" Her stutter was essentially gone, but it would come and go whenever her thoughts involved Naruto Uzumaki.

Anko smirked and wagged her finger; she took an obviously sarcastic motherly tone. "Tsk tsk. You're supposed to be on watch Hinata-chan! Switch those pretty little eyes of yours back on; you wouldn't want something _sneaking up on you… Right?_"

Hinata frowned and returned to her post, though this time, she felt a bit demoralized even though she was the first one to score a date with him.

No one could tell of course, with that hooded coat and high collar, but Shino had a smirk on his face as he overheard the exchange between the two women. He found Naruto's current situation rather entertaining, in a ridiculous sort of schadenfreudian way. He'd have to make sure his bugs kept tabs on the whole development when he got back.

* * *

Naruto was bursting at the seams by the time his team had made it to the checkpoint. After leaving Mitsuki in the medical tent, they were brought to the commanding officer's tent. It was tan of course, and it seemed rather extravagant and expensive for a forward command post. There at the desk, sat a familiar face, or, in this case, half of one. Baki turned to Naruto and gave a sigh of relief.

He spoke in a gruff voice.

"Uzumaki, you're here, let's get down to business."

Naruto and company nodded, they swiftly walked over to the make-shift desk.

Baki stood up and drew their attention to a piece of paper in his hand. "You've actually arrived at the perfect time. They relayed these instructions to us so that we may pass them on to you." Baki cleared his throat and read off of a piece of parchment, likely delivered via carrier pigeon.

"It says; _'Upon his arrival, you are to send Naruto Uzumaki into the caves, alone. Should negotiations run smoothly, you'll have the Kazekage back. If you send anyone aside from Naruto Uzumaki, the Kazekage will die. _

_~ Sasori of the Akatsuki"_

Baki tossed the piece of parchment behind him and it flew off into the wind, he had a defiant smirk on his face. The ninja of Konoha stared in blank confusion, after a short pause, the Suna Jonin spoke.

"Our sensor teams have detected the presence of another group in the cave system, and the best part of it all… they seem to be disrupting the Akatsuki operatives at the moment. A small team could _theoretically_ slip in unnoticed by Sasori's damned puppets and extract the Kazekage… Of course, that's where you all come in."

Kakashi took out a kunai and spun it around his finger. "Good for us then… show us the way to the entrance and we'll handle the rest."

Baki nodded and escorted the team to a makeshift wall in the blockade, he handed a set of short-range communicators to Naruto, Sakura, Kakashi, and Shikamaru. The Nara heir politely refused the offer, stating that he was just there for tactical support. Naruto stared at the earpiece he'd been handed, from what he could tell; Sunagakure's short-range communication devices were notably more advanced than Konoha's. It was painted with tan camouflage as opposed to Konoha's matte grey earpieces; it also seemed to have several buttons with channels assigned to them.

Naruto placed it on the ear opposite to his Konoha earpiece and switched it on. Baki spoke a few test phrases into the receiver and all of the Konoha shinobi gave him an all-clear sign.

Baki nodded and looked to Shikamaru. "We're currently in a stalemate, as it seems that Sasori accounted for everything that we'd ever think of, but I saw how you outmaneuvered my student Temari in the Chuunin Exams, she's a genius in her own right. You know the capabilities of your own teammates better than we ever could, anything you come up with will probably be more effective overall."

Baki bowed. "Please, save her."

He hastily walked away when a Suna tracker ninja waved him over to the other side of the command post.

Shikamaru ushered the team into another tent off to the side and pulled the chakra-powered radio receiver from his backpack. Sakura reached into her pouch and pulled out a scroll, from said scroll, she released a table and enough chairs for the team to sit down. Kakashi took the primary receiver from Shikamaru and set it down on the table, the cyclopean ninja fiddled with it for a few seconds until everyone's radios had been recalibrated to a new chakra wavelength, so as not to interfere with Sunagakure communications.

The Nara heir whipped out a pencil and some scratch paper and started to speak in a hushed tone.

"So, ever since we left, I'd been wondering how they'd make the exchange, and even if they'd make it at all. I can see them giving up this chance to capture the Shukaku in order to guarantee acquiring the Kyuubi. Konoha is the most heavily militarized of the ninja villages, so they'd have to risk a lot to come to us and kidnap Naruto. Instead, they're trying to get one of the more difficult captures out of the way by forcing us to make a decision between Naruto and Gaara. If even one of us screws up, they'll get both the Kyuubi _and_ the Shukaku…"

Naruto rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah. We've been over this already pineapple head! We gotta figure out how to smuggle Sakura-chan and Kakashi-sensei inside the caves without tippin' off the puppet patrol."

Shikamaru rolled his eyes. "And _**that's **_why I'm restating their motives, they factor into my plan, now lemme finish… We're going to give them a chance at capturing both the bijuu to create an opening."

Sakura scratched her head and began to think. "…A trojan horse ambush? … I don't like where this is going Shikamaru."

Shikamaru sighed. "I don't know if we have any other options Sakura, Akatsuki's just captured the Nibi, and they've been sighted near the Sanbi's hibernation site… You'll have to allow it just one last time."

Naruto's eyes bounced between Sakura and Shikamaru, and then to Kakashi, who was absentmindedly sharpening a pair of kunai.

Naruto's ears twitched in anticipation. "What?! What?! What?! What're we gonna do?!"

Kakashi cut Shikamaru off before he could answer by handing the two Kunai to Naruto. "…We're going to test the limits of your skill with that orange Hiraishin… Are you experienced enough to teleport objects _**to**_ you? … or is it only the other way around?"

Sakura vouched for Naruto. "He can bring objects to himself."

Naruto added on a warning. "I _can… _but… the mass of the object in question exponentially increases the amount of chakra I gotta use to transport it. This is _completely _different from traveling _**to **_a location. In other words, it takes more than twice as much chakra to use my own body as the anchor for the teleportation."

Shikamaru would have given Sakura a pleading look if she weren't such a pushover in these situations. "Naruto needs to use the fox's chakra again. Before you object, it's either that, or he uses his own chakra… I can't even list the number of things that could go wrong if he did that."

Sakura defeatedly stared at her hands. "Fine… just let me run a few tests, alright?"

Shikamaru just shrugged in reply while Kakashi's nose was buried in his porn.

Sakura ushered Naruto to another spot in the shade and he obliged. The pinkette had him lie on his back and began running some diagnostics, most of her focus was on Naruto chakra coils. They seemed to be regenerating and expanding, something normally considered impossible. She stared down at Naruto and sighed.

"Naruto… I know I can't stop you from doing this, but you have to be careful with the _Kitsune Kaminari_ from now on. Your chakra coils can't handle very much stress at the moment, that's why you get those waves of pain through your spinal column; your coils are leaking demonic chakra into your bodily tissue, if you use any more, you might rupture them."

Naruto shifted nervously. "So ah... what happens if I do that?"

Sakura shuddered. "You'll be ripped apart by an explosive release of chakra, and with your reserves, It's guaranteed to be fatal… We'll need to get you to Tsunade-sama as soon as possible following this mission."

Naruto grinned up at the medic. "Relax, I've got one more trick up my sleeve for this. Besides, if I die, I can't trick you into falling in love with me." He gave her a thumbs-up gesture.

Sakura smiled and chuckled, she thought to herself; _'I think you may have done that already, Naruto-kun.'_

Kakashi shifted his attention from Naruto and Sakura, to his Icha Icha book, he addressed Shikamaru without looking up.

"So, have you noticed Naruto's interesting circumstances over these past few days?"

Shikamaru stared at a solitary cloud passing overhead. "Yeah, and I can't exactly say that I envy his position right now. _Mendokuse_… I know for a fact that this is gonna get extremely messy for him."

Kakashi nodded. "Of course, but… The Hokage has a growing betting pool for this entire fiasco. I'd like your input on the odds."

Shikamaru appeared surprised at Kakashi's choice to defer to him. "Kakashi-senpai, I'll be honest, I'm pretty socially inept. If you want me to win a battle, just give me command and I'll make something happen… but this… It's not exactly my forté… But… based on my observations… I'd put my money on Ino."

Kakashi raised an eyebrow. "Hm. I placed my bet on Sakura, what makes you think Ino's got it?"

Shikamaru shut his eyes and raised his finger, in a sort of teaching gesture. "That depends, is Naruto obsessed with her yet?"

Kakashi shook his head. "I doubt that right now, he's interested, but not notably so. Why-"

Shikamaru cut the silver-haired ninja off. "Then that means she hasn't really made her move yet. She has this thing she does where she goes on three dates with a guy, and everything she does on these dates is a calculated risk, but whatever she does, it works. I really don't get it at all, but whenever she moves in, Naruto's gonna change his tune real quick. I'd rearrange my bet if I were you… but that's just my input."

Kakashi eye-smiled and scratched his head. "And I thought _Naruto_ was unpredictable."

Shikamaru yawned with half-lidded eyes. "Yeah, you and me both."

* * *

It seemed that blondes were the topic of conversation that day for everybody.

Several hours after her impromptu meeting with Asuma and Kurenai, Ino's vision was flooded with the platinum blonde hair of her fellow clan mates. She was with her parents at the front most table of the conference room.

It was obvious that mind of the Yamanaka heiress was elsewhere, primarily due to the fact that she stared down at her plate and absentmindedly pushed her food around.

She sat flanking Inoichi, with her mother, Rena Yamanaka, sitting on his other side. It was actually a rather entertaining scene; Ino was the spitting image of her mother, with a personality to match. In light of that, they both took the same disinterested slouch, creating an almost symmetrical visage, with Inoichi sitting firmly in the center.

If it were a painting, it'd be called _"Bewildered In Blonde" _or something to that effect. Iniochi was currently talking about the clan's genetic health, and from what Ino could tell, things were going well enough, no warnings against potential inbreeding or anything of that sort.

It was an overall… nausea-inducing affair for Ino, however, she knew it came with the territory of being the Yamanaka heiress. It wasn't like she had any siblings to pass the job down to, in fact, at the age of 15; she was the youngest member within the platinum blonde sea of hair.

It had been nearly twenty minutes and Ino had long ceased listening to her father prattle on, but judging from the fact that everyone's attention seemed to suddenly shift to her, she perked up and smiled out of reflex. It was likely that Inoichi was saying something about her.

Ino began listening out of necessity at this point.

Inoichi 's chest puffed out as he nearly gloated. "I'm proud to announce that my daughter, Ino Yamanaka, Heiress of the Yamanaka Clan, has been recommended for a promotion to Jonin!"

Ino's heart punched the inside of her chest as it sped up, she hastily stood up in a confused haze of excitement. Ino took a shallow bow as the applause and wolf whistles echoed through the conference room. Sure, the past few years had been interesting for Ino and team 10, but she was surprised that Asuma would call for her promotion so soon. Ino made a mental note to go motivate Chouji's fat ass to get promoted to jonin as well so he wouldn't be the odd one out.

Even with good news such as this, Ino's thoughts were still with one of the most powerful genin to ever walk the face of the earth. While this meeting was important for Ino to attend, she'd have rather been preparing her new apartment for Naruto to get back so she could make her move, especially with all of the other players in the game. Ino's mind began formulating contingencies and plans of action, but she managed to stop herself after thinking back to Asuma-sensei's advice.

Out of nowhere, Inoichi crudely ruffled Ino's hair in approval, much to her dismay.

"_Dad!"_

He chuckled to himself. "Sorry, sorry, you just used to be such a tomboy when you were little, I forgot for a second! Congratulations Ino-chan! We need to spar soon… I wanna see what all this Jonin fuss is about!"

Ino grinned at her Dad and looked to her mother, who gave a slow, yet commanding, nod of approval.

Ino's face turned red in astonishment when the entire room raised a toast to her, she laughed to herself and allowed her mind to drift from the future to the now… but not before one final thought.

'At least I have _something _to keep my mind off Naruto for the time being! But when he gets back… _he's __**mine**__."_

* * *

Tsunade was preparing to go home for the evening when the second powerful knock came to the door. The Hokage sighed, but she _was _interested in seeing who would come to visit her at this hour.

"_Come In."_

Tsunade's door creaked open, and this time, a familiar pair of glowing green eyes lit the doorway.

The Hokage smiled and ushered the visitor in. "I'd figured you'd be stopping by at some point, and I'd assume it has something to do with Naruto-kun… or maybe Mitsuki-chan?"

"Nothing ever catches _you_ off balance, does it Tsunade-san? _… _We've business to discuss, I've brought your favorite brand of Sake as well."

Tsunade crossed her arms as she smirked and leaned on her desk. "Discuss away."

* * *

**AN:** So I was reading Ino's entry on the Naruto wiki, and apparently, she was ranked second overall in the class (right behind Sasuke), so it'd make sense that she progressed through the ranks quickly. and also...A mysterious figure appears! You get a cookie if you can figure out who it is before chapter 31 drops. Also, Don't forget to vote and also take a look at the link/information_** to a picture of Mitsuki and Gaara-chan on my profile page**_

* * *

Da Votes:

At the time of writing this, these are the current standings for the poll. Of course; "Hokage or Bust" seems to be in the lead, but it seems that the "Strong Idiot" portrayal is gaining traction, decreasing the lead from 8, all the way down to 4. I too have a preference for Hokage or Bust… _HOWEVER_, the "Strong Idiot" idea is starting to grow on me, I had some pretty hilarious ideas come to mind concerning this version while I was planning Prologue Orange.

Until next time… keep voting people!

**18 Votes**

"_**Hokage or Bust" Naruto:**_ This potential portrayal will make Naruto more of the _"Pampered Orphan" _variety, a la Young Bruce Wayne. In my canon, Kakashi, Jiraiya, and the 3rd Hokage are much bigger parts of Naruto's early life, and in this portrayal _specifically_; they're actively grooming him to be the Hokage one day. He'll still be a hyperactive prankster, but he'll also be a bit more goal oriented, even going so far as to blow off a _mildly_ interested Sakura to train or learn about the previous Kage. His relationship with Sakura will grow more complex in order to bring him in line with his Orange Flash incarnation; the transition wouldn't make sense otherwise because Orange Flash Naruto is in love with Sakura. His doomed relationship with Haku will be his primary source of motivation to be the Hokage, because at first, he'll feel like he was forced onto his path and sort of apathetically walk toward it.

**14 Votes**

"_**Strong Idiot" Naruto**_: This Naruto isn't "_stupid_" per se, he just functions on the idea that; **"If it doesn't work, you didn't hit it hard enough."** What makes him different from Canon!Naruto, is that he actually has the physical abilities to back up his brutish approach to life. Naruto's the strongest genin in the class, tied with Sasuke. Normally, this would have him put on another team for balancing purposes, but he's assigned to Team 7 because his high grades concerning his physical abilities don't average well with his abysmal grades in the more mental intensive categories (i.e. espionage, stealth, strategy, etc.) Hilarity ensues as Kakashi constantly tries and fails to teach Naruto the importance of finesse in shinobi life (i.e. that being a walking hammer doesn't make all of your problems nails). He'll get on Sasuke's nerves from time to time with his uncanny ability to solve everything with force. This version of Naruto will gradually balance out his skill set over the course of the story, this way, he'll be more in line with his older-self in the main story. Haku's death will cause him to reevaluate his approach to shinobi life, this forces him to place more emphasis on using his mind, as he'll feel that he could have saved Haku where he a more well-rounded ninja.

**9 Votes**

_**Delinquent Naruto: **_ This version is as close as I'll go to _Dark!_Naruto. He's brash, chirpy, confrontational, and **violently** temperamental. The entire class, save for Sasuke and Hinata is scared shitless of him. I believe Naruto has every right to be angry at the world, even in my canon with Kakashi, Jiraiya, and the 3rd Hokage as his surrogate family. While Naruto has been adequately provided for in my canon, his guardians still keep him in the dark, and by extension, at a distance. Because he can't know the truth of his lineage quite yet, and due to the fact that Naruto's guardians all had close relationships with his parents, Naruto has no one to talk to... he's just frustrated. His experience with Haku and Zabuza will mellow him out so that he gradually becomes more in sync with his personality in Orange flash.

**8 Votes**

"_**Two-Face" Naruto: **_This version of Naruto _**isn't**_ dark, hyper intelligent, or brooding _(leave that shit to Sasuke… or Batman… __**Dark!Naruto is ridiculous. Stop it.**__)_, this version merely has two distinct sides, happy go-lucky, and listless solitude. Kishimoto mentions it, but doesn't elaborate on such an important piece of Naruto as a character. I'll delve into his loneliness a bit more in this incarnation; Team 7 (except Kakashi) will generally hate his guts until they understand how truly damaged Naruto is as a person. For this Naruto, his complex nature is what sows the initial seeds of Sakura's attraction to him. His transition to the Naruto we see in Orange Flash will happen during the training trip as he learns to discard his mask and show the underneath (i.e. a matter of fake smiles vs. real ones).


	31. Chapter 31: Reunions II

AN: In case you haven't noticed... Orange Flash has just hit 1000 followers and is still counting! Just puttin' it out there... But anyway, I think its some sort of happy accident that this story's become so popular without any advertisement on my part, it means that people are sharing it and passing it around, which makes me feel awesome! Thanks for reading my shit... forreal doe! ... Anyway, the battle ends next chapter, and the arc will come to a close shortly after the fact. Stay tuned! I was unsure of how I wanted to do this fight for a while, but when I started typing, the rest just came natural. Don't forget to favorite, follow, and most importantly, review. Any comments or criticisms are greatly appreciated since they help me improve my writing.

* * *

'_So, how am I gonna be able to use Kitsune Kaminari this one time?"_

'… _**I've just finished repairing your nervous system, but your chakra coils… I'll need more time for that.'**_

'_What'm I supposed to do then?'_

The Kyuubi abruptly dragged Naruto into the sewer-cage. Naruto stumbled a moment and glared at the sneering face on the other side of the bars.

"_**The one who defeated me your… 4**__**th**__** Hokage? I never bothered myself keeping track of your human leaders... He could use the ability with minimal chakra cost because he manually applied the seal to a given object before battle. Your version of the technique has more flexibility in combat because you can apply the seal to any inanimate object on the fly; however, the chakra costs are greatly exaggerated… You see where I'm going with this?"**_

"_Yeah, I gotcha. I'll have to draw it somewhere."_

"_**One more thing… Why is your mind a sewer?"**_

Mindscape Naruto paused and started looking around with an uncharacteristic blank expression.

"_Holy crap. I never noticed how weird and/or stupid that was… How 'bout this? I'll change it when you figure out what's happening to my body."_

The fox sneered at Naruto and rolled his eyes. _**"Alright then, I'll get back to you when I understand. Now get out."**_

Naruto was unceremoniously booted from his own mind and was once again back in the desert.

After muttering some hushed expletives concerning a certain Kitsune, he took a deep breath as he approached the cave network, alone. He could feel the adrenaline pumping through his veins, as the shadowed entrance grew larger on his approach.

Naruto pressed the button on his Konoha communicator. _"Alright… I'm approaching the cave, get ready you two."_

He then pressed the Suna communicator in his other ear. "Post… Sigma? … Hey, this is Naruto Uzumaki."

There was a short pause, and then a familiar voice. "Naruto huh? Good to hear. This is Kankuro, I'm your liaison for the strike team, any orders you have go through me."

"_Kankuro? … You're the puppet guy! I didn't expect to be hearing from you again so soon."_

"Yeah, well, Gaara's my little _sister_."

Naruto nodded in understanding, despite the fact that Kankuro was hundreds of meters away.

"…_That's all I needed to hear. _Wait for my signal, I'll need your team to extract Gaara-chan while we deal with Sasori."

Naruto could feel Kankuro's trepidation on the other side of the comm link despite his even-toned delivery. Because of that, Naruto offered some reassurance. "I'll get your sister back, that's a promise dattebayo!"

Kankuro smirked and loaded a few extra grenades into Karasu while he was making. "You'd better, now more so than ever. Baki-sensei just told me Sasori is capable of taking control of enemy puppets, so I'm more of a liability than an asset here. It's a miracle he hasn't done it already… As much as it sucks, I'll be sitting this one out, I need you to deck'im one for me."

Naruto cracked his neck and grinned in anticipaion. "O' course!"

Naruto's smile slowly faded and then, he took a deep breath. After he uttered his final words of affirmation, he stopped and took a knee. Naruto reached into one of his flak jacket pouches and pulled out a blank scroll. He ripped a short stretch from the scroll and tore it into many small pieces. He pulled a miniature pen from the bracelet Gaara gave him and started copying seals down. After the ink dried, he ran a bit of chakra through the seals to prime the teleportation for use.

The seals glowed blue for a few short moments before turning black once more; Naruto hid two sheets of paper in his gloves and attached the rest to his kunai and shurikane. After a few stretches, Naruto tapped his communicator.

"_I'm at the mouth of the cave, commencing radio silence."_

It was here that a headless puppet slowly floated from the entrance and up to Naruto.

Naruto crossed his arms and glared at the puppet. "So, what're you waiting for?"

The headless puppet floated, completely still, but then it abruptly wrapped its limbs around Naruto's torso.

There was a short and awkward pause while Naruto stared at the featureless marionette. This pause was shortened primarily due to the increasingly loud clacking noise his attention slowly went from the puppets' crushing grip to the five additional puppets barreling toward him.

Naruto's heart sped up and he prepared himself for the incoming impact. The squad of puppets came crashing into the jinchuuriki, launching him off his feet, each one restrained one of Naruto's limbs so he couldn't make handsigns, with the fifth puppet appearing to examine Naruto for any sort of abnormalities.

It cocked its head to the side before slapping Naruto across the face, likely to check if he was a clone of some sort. Naruto made a point to spit on its eyeball in retaliation, but the puppet paid no mind.

The six puppets promptly floated Naruto into the air and whisked him deep into the cave network. They zoomed through the darkness, and over time, an unidentifiable sound became increasingly louder, it almost sounded like a powerful wind

Naruto anticipated the worst as he could feel his captors taking him to the central cavern… His nightmares were confirmed, he could see Gaara floating in the air, the spirit of the Shukaku fighting to stay attached to Gaara's seal. She appeared to be in serious pain as she fought to keep herself conscious.

Naruto would have unintentionally killed himself with his demonic chakra were it not for his confusion at what happened next. Sasuke and Kabuto came shooting out of the ground, Kabuto grabbed Gaara while Sasuke flashed through hand-seals and launched a fireball at Deidara, forcing the man to jump from his sealing position.

These actions shorted out the jutsu, causing the Shukaku's spirit to zoom back into Gaara's limp body. Naruto took the opportunity to activate the seals in his gloves, and in a flash of yellow light, Kakashi and Sakura were holding Naruto's hands. They let go of Naruto's hands, and in the blink of an eye, Kakashi had ripped the puppets to shreds.

Sasori swung his hand and a multitude of puppets stormed in and wrested Gaara from Kabuto's grip, the puppets tossed the Kazekage to Deidara, who gingerly caught her, as if trying not to break a precious vase.

Sasori snapped at Deidara in his raspy voice. "Get her back to base, I'll deal with our guests."

Deidara smirked and fired explosive birds at the group of intruders and created a larger one for the purpos of transportation. The bomber slung the Kazekage over his shoulder and jumped on his creation's back, it spread its wings and zoomed out the nearest hole in the wall.

Naruto started after Kabuto, but several puppets barred his path.

Kakashi charged and fired several lightning hounds from his chidori, instantly clearing a path for himself. "Naruto, Sakura! Deidara's a bad matchup for you. I'll get the Kazekage, just survive until I get back."

Kakashi chased after Deidara, with Kabuto following close behind, the sound jonin gave Sasuke a serious look before yelling one last reminder.

"Sasuke-san! Remember why we came here!"

Sasuke nodded and drew his sword, while Sakura looked at the Uchiha boy in horror, she wasn't at all ready to face him yet.

"S-Sasuke-kun?"

Sasuke turned to Sakura and gave her a blank stare of indifference, as if expecting her to say something of value… that never happened. The pinkette just stared as years of repressed emotions flooded back to her, their moment on the bench, their battles in the forest of death, eeven the days they spent just hanging out as friends.

Naruto was of course slightly less amused to see his former teammate, they glared at each other, and if it weren't for Sasori's presence, they'd have likely destroyed the immediate area with their second reunion.

Naruto squeezed his fists tight enough for his knuckles to start cracking. "You're lucky you know, if Sakura weren't here…"

Sasuke glared at Naruto. "I'd crush you like everything else that's stood in my way... You look tired."

"T_eme_..."

Sakura could feel the air around her teammates drop in temperature, the amount of killing intent leaking off of them made it seem like their relationship was beyond salvaging.

Suddenly, a loud clacking sound snapped Team 7's attention to the puppet man in front of them.

Glaring at Sasori, Sasuke's sharingan spun in a menacing fashion as he addressed his former friends.

"Perhaps we should save this for some other time."

Sasori flicked his tail and a dozen puppets zipped into the cavern. "Yes, let's."

Suddenly, the hunchback ripped off his robe, revealing a distinctly inhuman body shape, there was more clacking and the mask on Sasori's back began to creak open. Team 7 stared in confusion as a young redhead arose from the scorpion-like puppet, he looked at Sasuke and smirked.

"An Uchiha? … It seems Itachi's still a novice when it comes genocide."

Sasuke narrowed his eyes and readied his sword; Naruto drew his blade as well, and Sakura cracked her knuckles.

Naruto took a light-footed kenjutsu stance and started hopping back and forth, ready for anything. This particular stance was created for use against multiple opponents, and it also happened to be the first thing Kakashi showed Naruto about swordplay.

Naruto smirked at Sasuke and chirped.

"Oi teme! Still remember our old battle formations?"

"…Vaguely."

"Cool. Sakura-chan! We're taking defensive formation 3!"

Sakura nodded in a bewildered sort of astonishment and shuffled into position, the three ninja were standing in a circle, guarding each other's blind spots. Sasori hopped out of his scorpion puppet and smirked, flicking his fingers. The 12 puppets sprung into action, encircling Team 7, they began to fly around erratically, weaving up and down, left and right, in all sorts of directions.

Naruto's eyes slowly scanned the blurs above him; he was trying to figure out how the puppets would frame their points of attack. Naruto narrowed his eyes and noticed a simultaneous shift in the momentum of the 12 puppets. They all seemed to bend slightly, then, they accelerated forward.

Naruto formed a rasengan in one of his hands and thrust it into the torso of an incoming puppet there was a pause, and then, in a gust of wind, the puppet was sent spinning into the charging marionettes behind it, taking a handful of other would-be assailants with it. They were sent smashing into the ceiling; they then clattered to the ground in a heap, visibly damaged beyond repair.

Sasuke stretched his sword upward and ran the chidori through his blade, he diced a charging puppet into neat cubes before discharging the electricity within his sword, like a bug zapper, nearly all of the nearby puppets were burned to a crisp by the arcing energy... Save for one.

Sasuke's eyes zeroed in on an incoming wrist blade, likely poisoned. He paid it no mind when Sakura's hand stretched into his field of vision and grabbed the puppets wrist. She swiftly squeezed down and there was a sickening crack. The puppet's wrist had been pulverized into sawdust; and the metal housings for the retractable blades were now exposed, appearing as a mass of twisted metal protruding from the puppet's stump of an arm. Sakura proceeded to rip the pupped to shreds with her bare hands.

The puppets head flew in Sasuke's general direction, so he nonchalantly swatted it back to Sasori. Sasori's smirk grew slightly as he observed his puppet's head in mid air, Sasuke had attached an explosive tag to it. He twitched a finger and his scorpion puppet zoomed into the path of the flying head, but that singular movement wasn't the only thing Sasori mandated to his puppets. Dozens more puppets began to file into the cavern.

Sasori started to mock Team 7.

"I take it you don't like my art? … I'm sure I've got a piece _somewhere _in my repertoire that you'll enjoy."

Naruto spat and flung a shuriken at Sasori's open mouth, one of his puppets swatted it out of the air with an ankle blade. It appeared to taunt Naruto, cocking its head to the side as if it were amused.

Naruto frowned at the redhead and charged. "You talk too much."

Sakura sighed and followed suit, intending to make sure Naruto didn't get himself killed. Sasuke charged some more lightning chakra into his blade and charged forward as well. There was a flurry of orange blades, rasengan blasts, fists, and lightning strikes, each swipe taking one or more puppets with it.

Sasori sat in the rear, nonchalantly going through a large scroll he had previously hidden inside of Hiruko, his constant half-smile annoyed Naruto to no end, his demeanor showed almost no concern for the situation at hand.

Naruto could feel the Kyuubi's chakra begin to spill into his system, luckily, he noticed and was able to center himself once more. He dodged a swipe from a marionette and caught its wrist. He tightened his grip and delivered a solid kick to the puppet's torso, detaching the arm completely.

Naruto punted another incoming puppet into the ceiling before flipping the arm to Sakura, she caught it and squeezed the wrist. The casing splintered slightly under her grip, forcing the wrist blade to eject from the palm slot. Sakura spun around, impaling a charging enemy through the upper-chest with the said blade.

Sasuke came flipping back over to his former teammates; he skidded across the ground and came to a stop next to Naruto. He tapped the blonde on the shoulder and pointed to the cloud of incoming puppets. Naruto blazed through some handsigns and started to furiously swing his orange blade. Gusts of wind began to emanate from the sword's tip, causing the puppets to be slammed into each other. Naruto's attack was powerful enough to cause the entire cave network to shake, cracks began to shoot along the walls as well.

Sasuke glared at the jinchuuriki. "You're gonna get us killed you idiot! Mind your surroundings!"

Naruto twitched in annoyance and caught a pebble that fell from the ceiling after his attack shook the cavern. He pulverized it in annoyance and returned to the task at hand.

Naruto scoffed at the Uchiha boy and motioned for Sakura to deal with the pile of puppets. She took the opportunity to charge them; a thin aura of chakra surrounded her as she sped toward the slowly recovering pile.

Sakura leapt as high as her legs would allow and came crashing down into the pile of puppets, sending all 50 or so careening off in all directions. None of them appeared to be in one piece, as disembodied hands, feet, heads, and fingers were sent bouncing across the cave floor.

Sasori rolled his eyes and placed his hand on one of the seals in his opened scroll, Hiruko stood at the puppet master's side, it's menacingly blank stare made even more detailed by Sasuke's sharingan eyes... the young Uchiha shuddered slightly.

There was a gigantic cloud of smoke, and 100 red-cloaked puppets appeared, along with a singular one, it had a black cloak and black hair as well. They were all standing in a grid formation, just behind Sasori, who abruptly stopped thumbing through his scroll. He handed it to Hiruko, who placed it inside his stomach and gave Team 7 a dismissive stare.

"You know, I don't get to do this very often… not that you'll live long enough for it to matter… I suppose I'm just… savoring the moment."

The three shinobi shuffled closer together and anticipated another zerg rush; Sasori instead threw off his Akatsuki robe, and what those three young ninja saw that day, they'd never forget. From the neck down, Sasori appeared entirely mechanical. Springs, wooden joints, metal pins, and not a single trace of human tissue seemed to remain. Sasuke narrowed his eyes at the cylindrical block that protruded slightly from Sasori's chest, it was likely the heart core Orochimaru was talking about. Sasuke's mind was set on acquiring the snake contract from his master.

Sasori's right chest compartment swung open and dozens of chakra strings sprung from the shaded hole. As each one connected to a puppet, it would twitch and spring to life, then, the string would disappear from view.

Sasori took a shallow bow. "Welcome to my _Performance of a Hundred Puppets. _I hope you find my art aesthetically pleasing."

The 100 puppets mirrored him and bowed as well before taking aggressive postures, team 7 glared at the rather chatty puppet master, who smirked back.

"I understand, talk is cheap… Well then, let's go right to the main event!"

Sasori swung his hand and a hundred streaks of red came screaming at Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura. Their eyes widened at the increased speed of the puppets. The red-clad monstrosities all simultaneously drew their respective wrist blades, ankle blades, poison dart guns, etc.

Naruto tackled both of his teammates and they all disappeared in a flash of yellow light. Team 7 appeared on the ceiling next to the shuriken that Naruto had chucked at Sasori earlier. They took what little time they had before the puppets figured out where they were hiding to survey the situation.

Hiruko and the black-clad puppet seemed to be standing guard on Sasori's flanks, while the reds were zooming around the cave. Sasori raised his voice, catching their attention.

"There's that jutsu again. The 4th Hokage would be proud to know that someone from his village was able to make use of such an advanced, and at such a young age too. Even so, it won't do you any good, I see what my puppets see, so your speed advantage means nothing to me…"

Sasori suddenly turned to look at the shadowed ceiling where Team 7 was hiding.

"The same trick won't work on me twice… How about I give you a sporting chance? …A morsel of pertinent information? In return, you have to come down from there."

Sakura cocked her head to the side and frowned in anticipation.

Sasori raised his hands off to the side in a taunting manner. "Every blade, every dart, every grappling cable. All of them are coated with my personally developed neurotoxin. You wouldn't believe the amount of prep time that goes into this technique… this… _art. _I'd be honored if I were in your position."

Naruto growled and his already slitted eyes shifted red. "This prick's just showing off now! He's just stalling us so his buddy can escape with Gaara-chan!"

Red chakra started to billow from Naruto's mouth as the rocks he was hanging on to began to crack and splinter beneath his grip.

Sakura placed a firm hand on his shoulder and glared at him. "Naruto. Calm down. _**Now.**_"

Naruto had once again nearly forgotten the precarious nature of his chakra circulation system. The mild pain from Sakura's death grip on Naruto's clavicle made him take a deep breath, causing the red to fade from his eyes.

The three shinobi dropped from the shadows along the ceiling and were immediately surrounded by the red puppet army. Sasuke's eyes scanned the cave and they stopped on the stalactites along the ceiling he turned to Sakura and pointed upward.

"You two'll probably get poisoned before we can destroy all 100 of these damned puppets. Sakura… we'll find a way for you to cause a cave-in."

Naruto spun his ninjato in his hand and raised an eyebrow as he surveyed the slowly approaching red cloaks.

"I may not be the sharpest guy around, but I'm pretty sure that's not a good idea. Who's gonna keep us from gettin' crushed by boulders if Sakura-chan's way up in the air smashing the roof open?"

Sasuke waved his now chirping sword in front of Naruto. "That's what _**I'm**_ here for, _Dobe._"

Naruto growled at his comrade. "I'm gonna stab you as soon as this is over."

"Take a number jackass."

Sakura smiled slightly, for a short moment, it was like they were a family once more, but the moment was interrupted by the sounds of clanging metal. Sasuke and Naruto were furiously parrying and dodging strikes and swings while Sakura simultaneously covered their backs.

The three ninja weaved in and out of formation, adjusting for the density of the attacking puppets and their attack speed as well. Suddenly, they pulled back and the largest of the red-cloaked marionettes attempted to either crush them with its giant fist or separate the defensive formation, likely a bit of both. Luckily, Sakura was with them, she stretched her hands up and caught the giant's fist before it could crush them. The ground beneath Sakura's feet began to give and she sunk into the stone floor slightly. Naruto and Sasuke became an orange and white blur respectively.

They zoomed above and dragged their blades along the armored giant's arm, both of them simultaneously flipped into their final strikes on the giant's shoulder joint. The momentum of Naruto and Sasuke's flip carried their blades through the giant steel ball bearing in the monstrous puppet's shoulder joint.

The right arm popped off with a quick yank from Sakura. She spun around and smacked the massive puppet square in the jaw with the shoulder bearing, it was sent flying into the far wall.

Sakura continued to wildly swing the arm, batting puppets left and right. Sasuke and Naruto nodded at Sakura and in a blur, they were next to her, Sakura tossed the giant arm at Sasori and his two bodyguards. The one in black zoomed forward and swung its arm, black dust billowed from the arm and quickly formed a gigantic blade. The disembodied arm was sliced in half and the two pieces slammed into the far wall, creating an explosion of pebbles and dust.

Naruto and Sasuke took the opening to place their hands together in a sort of boosting position. Sakura ran and hopped onto their hands, Naruto and Sasuke grunted and threw Sakura as hard as they could into the high ceiling.

The crimson dot that was her tank top became smaller and smaller until it faded into nothingness along the vast shadow of the ceiling. When she was no longer visible, there was a short pause, and then, an explosion. The ceiling crumbled into millions of pieces, and the rays of the desert sun immediately lit the gargantuan cavern.

However, not long after daylight pierced the shadows, falling boulders and other assortments of sharp rocks blotted out the sun once more.

Naruto sheathed his orange blade and formed a rasengan in each hand; he looked at Sasuke, who seemed to have done the same with his chidori. The two boys hopped closer together and covered the each other's backs.

Naruto pulverized boulder after boulder with his rasengan, by holding onto them as opposed to letting them go upon impact, he essentially had super powerful drills attached to his palms. His hands blasted through the stone as if it were brittle pottery.

Sasuke on the other hand was vaporizing the falling rock with his dual-chidori, a simple feat really, as apparently a bolt of lightning is hotter than the surface of the sun. Naruto and Sasuke were a sight to behold, they were a whirling death machine of orange, white, and blue flashes, pebbles flew about like a hail of bullets, creating thousands of tiny craters in the ground and walls nearby.

When the smoke cleared, Sakura came crashing down next to them, she rolled out of her fall and skidded right back to her spot between Naruto and Sasuke. The three climbed to the top of the rubble and scanned the area. It was littered with tattered pieces of red cloth and also with blades and other pieces that once belonged to Sasori's red puppets.

There was a rumbling sound near the east wall and a visibly annoyed Sasori dug himself from the rubble. Hiruko and the black one followed shortly after, he seemed amused and annoyed at the same time.

"You brats truly are impressive, the only way to counter this technique is to neutralize it before I get moving, and you've managed to do so on the fly… such potential within each of you. I'm surprised we haven't recruited more operatives from Konoha."

Sasori indelicately scraped a scuff mark off his eyeball with one of the poisoned blades he picked up from the ground, Team 7 gave him varied looks of disgust.

He pointed to his right. "You've already met Hiruko here, but this other one is my favorite."

Sasori turned to his black-cloaked puppet. "Children, this is the 3rd Kazekage… or what's left of him at least."

Sakura raised an eyebrow; the mysterious disappearance of the 3rd Kazekage was mentioned in passing in the academy's history books, but never elaborated on, likely because of the Akatsuki member in front of them. He was famous for his _Magnet Release _techniques, a fusion of the earth and electricity chakra natures.

* * *

(AN: I know it's supposed to be earth and wind, but earth and electricity makes more sense as far as magnetism goes).

* * *

Sakura tapped her communicator and whispered to Shikamaru while Sasori began his monologue on his efforts to capture the Sandaime Kazekage.

"_Nara-kun. Did you ever take Shinobi Applied Physics in the academy?"_

"_Yeah… Haruno, weren't you there too?"_

"_Yes, I was, but I can't remember this one tiny bit of info. What do you remember about the magnetism unit? … More specifically, magnetic fields."_

"_Pretty much all of it. Shoot."_

"_Is it possible to disrupt or cancel one out?"_

"_From what we learned, you could theoretically use an electric charge to screw with the polarity of the field."_

"_Good… Now here's Sasuke-kun. Can you tell him how to do it?"_

On the other end of the line, Shikamaru nearly choked to death, as he was chugging water from his canteen.

"… _Wait what? You wanna run that by me one more time?"_

"_Nara-kun, I'll explain later."_

"… _Right then, whatever floats your boat."_

Sakura discreetly slipped Sasuke the communicator and he made like he was brushing some of his hair out of his eyes in order to slip it onto his ear. He seemed to be absorbing the information quickly enough; Sakura brought her attention to Naruto, who for once, seemed to be paying attention to Sasori's story…

The keyword there was _seemed. _Sakura could see Naruto scribbling symbols onto the handles of his Kunai behind his back. He was doing it with a miniature pen, likely kept hidden beneath his bracelet. Sakura noticed a glint of red come off of said jewelry before turning her attention to Sasuke, who tossed Sakura's communicator back.

The Uchiha drew his sword again and stepped to the front of the group, he spun his tomoe in anticipation.

Sasori cut his monologue short and smirked at the young Uchiha. "I suppose the story loses its luster when you can sense the imminence of your death. Relax… I'll make it all better."

Ten blades sprung from Sasori's hips, and spring-loaded nozzles jumped out of his palms.

Naruto took his familiar light-footed stance and began to bounce around before taunting Sasori with an obscene gesture.

The team blasted off in different directions, the puppets followed suit. Sasori followed Naruto, while Sasuke fought the third Kazekage, this left Sakura to fight Hiruko.

Sasori's buzz saw blades zoomed furiously at Naruto's limbs, Naruto could tell that Sasori's aim was to immobilize him, not kill him. Naruto jumped and did a horizontal pirouette, parrying the buzz saw and throwing Sasori off balance. Naruto then grabbed Sasori's wrists and attempted to overpower him, Sasori's puppet body was freakishly strong, though not quite on the same level as Naruto's demonically enhanced musculature, or Sakura's strength technique. Naruto slowly, but surely, began to overpower the puppet master, his plan was to try and dismember Sasori piece by piece. Sasori could see the armor on his forearms begin to give under Naruto grip, and because Naruto was too close to ward off with the hip blades, Sasori did the next best thing. He headbutted Naruto, causing the jinchuuriki to lose his grip and stumble backward.

Sasori nonchalantly jammed one of his arm nozzles at Naruto and a jet of water erupted from it, Naruto sidestepped and watched as the jet sliced clean through the rocks behind him. The blonde slung a hail of his marked kunai over and around the torrent of water, and also at random spots in the room, he then teleported through the Sasori's line of attack. Now, Naruto was once again in close combat with the puppet-man.

Sasori blocked and parried Naruto's blade with his wrists and forearm, occasionally swinging one of his hip blades at openings in Naruto's line of attack. Naruto did a backwards handspring to gain some distance and began forming a rasengan.

Sasori pointed both his hands into the air and fired a torrent of water and a cloud of fire. The resulting steam made Naruto feel a little nervous; he squinted and used the Rasengan to clear a small circle of visibility around himself.

There was silence, save for the sound of crackling electricity and the crashing noises associated with Sakura's fighting style. Naruto narrowed his eyes and scanned the fog for a glint of metal or the slightest sign of movent.

For what seemed like an eternity, Naruto stood in wait for his opponent, suddenly, he heard a distant, high-pitched buzzing sound, almost like a winch coming undone. There was a sudden whistling noise and Naruto leaned backward slightly, a metallic cable with a pointed tip flew past Naruto's nose, had he not moved, it likely would have drilled through his jaw and out the other side of his cheek.

Naruto batted it away with the broad side of his sword and charged in the direction of the cable. The blur of orange came shooting out of the fog, only to find that it was some sort of detachable turret mechanism that fired the giant rope dart at him. Naruto's realization that he'd been fooled, shattered his concentration, this caused his rasengan to dissipate. The turret had then retracted the rope dart and seemed to be lining up another shot. The boy hastily lifted the mechanism above his head in order to make himself impossible to target. Naruto heard a whistling sound and instinctively spun around, he was just in the nick of time to block one of Sasori's buzz saws.

Sasori fired a poison dart from a hole in his pupil at Naruto, who retaliated by catching it between his teeth and attempting to stab Sasori through the heart core. Sasori back-stepped with a smirk on his face, Naruto spat the dart back at the puppet master, it weakly bounced off of his neck.

Sasori's smirk remained however, and the blonde's eyes widened as time slowed down for him. While blocking Sasori's blade with the turret, and also stopping the poison dart, Naruto had left himself open to attack. He could now see that the puppet master had been lining up his flamethrower during that split-second clash.

"You're tired. Aren't you, Uzumaki?"

Naruto didn't even hear Sasori's jab at his waning vitality. To dodge the wall of fire, Naruto instinctively drew on the fox's chakra and disappeared in a flash of orange light… something he would come to regret immediately.

Naruto reappeared on the wall next to an errant kunai, but before he could right himself along the wall, a wave of pain ricocheted through his spinal column and a cloud of blood exploded from Naruto's mouth. Both blood and chakra began to leak from Naruto's mouth, nose, and eyes, as well as his pores. Naruto yelped and went stiff, falling back to the ground. Sasori allowed the Jinchuuriki to come crashing down at his feet and raised his hip blades to dismember Naruto for ease of transport.

Before the blades came into contact with Naruto's skin, Hiruko's pulverized upper body came crashing into Sasori, sending the both of them careening into the walls. The impact caused a few more chunks of rock to fall from the sky-light Sakura had created earlier.

In a blur of red and pink, Sakura scooped a coughing Naruto into her arms and hid behind a rock formation. She worriedly looked at him struggle to even stay on all fours and began to heal his internal injuries.

He coughed up a bit of blood before squeezing Sakura's hand, Naruto's voice was barely a rasp.

"S-sorry. Had to dodge… _fire…_"

Naruto passed out then and there, Sakura figured she had about another thirty seconds to stabilize Naruto before Sasori dusted himself off. She went to work making sure he didn't damage himself too much with his stunt; healing his vital organs as much as possible. After she was done, Sakura wiped the blood from Naruto's mouth and sighed in relief when she checked his pulse. Just as strong as ever, she hugged the unconscious boy and cradled him in her arms.

"_Baka... Always making me worry."_

Sakura kicked a hole in the rocky wall and placed Naruto in it, she then lifted a boulder that was large enough to where she was the only one that could move it out of the way. The medic-nin dropped it in front of the hole and turned her attention to Sasuke, who seemed to be doing just fine against the 3rd Kazekage, his electricity and fire-based techniques barred the puppet from making full use of its iron sand, thus allowing Sasuke to keep the pressure on.

The cloud of dust on the far side of the room began to clear, and Sakura could see Sasori's figure begin to appear through it. He glared at Sakura as he dropped what was left of Hiruko onto the cave floor.

"I'll have you know, I don't take very kindly to those who vandalize my art."

Sasori's jaw went slack, and then, it opened far wider than any person could hope to do, the synthetic skin on his cheeks was ripped apart, creating a truly frightening visage. Another pair of nozzles slowly peered out of his mouth; he then grabbed some sort of metal contraption from the ground and placed it into the opening in his stomach, it looked like some sort of turret to Sakura.

A panel on the puppet master's back opened up and out sprouted eight metal legs, they were extremely long and spindly and also were very sharp at the ends. These extra protrusions also seemed to be covered in barbs, likely poisoned. The spider legs lifted Sasori into the air and now, his face seemed to have taken a distinctly inhuman expression of blankness as his monotone voice intimidated Sakura.

"I'm going mount you _**all**_ on my wall as my new _**favorite**_ trophies… You… You shall be my magnum opus, my greatest achievement."

Sasori's voice seemed to be coming from nowhere, as his mouth no longer moved when he spoke.

Sakura's hands began to shake slightly, never had it been so obvious that she was fighting out of her weight class, until now… Some part of her was starting to regret putting that boulder in Naruto's way, in hopes that he'd find the strength to come through for her in the end, but no, that wouldn't be happening any time soon. Naruto had done that far too many times already that day.

Sakura need a miracle, and fast… and that's what she got…

It had suddenly started to rain, and out of nowhere, a thunderstorm had rolled in. Sakura could feel a mass of chakra off to her left and so, took a look in that direction, Sasuke had one hand to the sky, and an occasional arc of electricity would jump from his arm.

He glared at the Sandaime Kazekage and pointed in a menacing fashion. _"Begone with the roar of the thunder… KIRIN!"_

The storm picked up intensely and Sakura could see a dragon made of lightning peering down at the black-cloaked puppet, it then disappeared above the cloud, there was a short pause as Sasori and his puppet stared in awe at Sasuke's technique.

Sasuke scoffed and then, the dragon came crashing down and hit the 3rd Kazekage right between the eyes, it tried futilely, to block the dragon with its iron sand, but the energy arced straight through the powdered metal. All the puppet succeeded in doing was prolonging its life for a few milliseconds. The Iron sand eventually had to discharge the massive quantities of energy, and the static went straight to the next highest object, in this case, it was the 3rd Kazekage's skull. The marionette was vaporized completely.

Sasuke looked at Sasori and crossed his arms before dressing him down.

"The biggest mistake you made was _**not **_running away when she destroyed the ceiling. That technique requires a lot of set up, and by pure chance, you've done most of it for me."

Sasuke's curse mark activated and Sakura shuddered at the familiar tattoos adorning Sasuke's body.

Sasori blankly stared at Sasuke and clacked his joints, obviously recognizing the curse seal technique.

Naruto, still half conscious could hear what was going on outside, struggled to tap his communicator. It took him nearly ten seconds, he took a deep breath and rasped and rasped.

"_Hey… Kankuro… Now'd be a good time for you guys to lend a hand… **I think I'm dying.**"_

The other end of the comm link buzzed. _"Will do. Hang on Naruto!" _

Naruto sighed and passed out again, his spinal area was screaming at him right now, at this point, he'd have preferred taking Sasori's flamethrower to the face.

Sasuke cracked his knuckles and drew his sword. "Let's end this."

* * *

AN: Thanks for reading everyone, _**Reunions III (i.e. Chapter 32) **_will be out soon since I have a little bit more free time before my summer vacation ends. The next chapter will help contextualize the current state of Sasuke and Sakura's relationship, and also, I'm going to try to make Sasuke a more consistent **_(ahem... better) _**rival for Naruto to butt heads with in future battles.

**_Prologue Orange Info:_**

I'm planning on finishing this arc before I start work on Prologue Orange, so just bear with me for a little while longer. Prologue Orange will be randomly updated as I get inspiration for an event. It'll be in a typical episodic format until the end of the wave arc. After that, it'll begin to jump forward in time at random intervals as I come up with interesting story premises, which will lead into Sasuke's estrangement and the end of his friendship with Naruto. Beyond that, don't expect Prologue Orange to eclipse Orange Flash in scope. Follow, favorite, and review Pl0x! Anyway, here are the votes so far.

At the time of releasing this chapter, Hokage or Bust has lengthened the lead once more, going from 4 to 7. Remember to keep reading and voting, you can find this poll at the top of my profile, come on… it'll only take you like… 12 seconds.

**23 Votes**

"_**Hokage or Bust" Naruto:**_ This potential portrayal will make Naruto more of the _"Pampered Orphan" _variety, a la Young Bruce Wayne. In my canon, Kakashi, Jiraiya, and the 3rd Hokage are much bigger parts of Naruto's early life, and in this portrayal _specifically_; they're actively grooming him to be the Hokage one day. He'll still be a hyperactive prankster, but he'll also be a bit more goal oriented, even going so far as to blow off a _mildly_ interested Sakura to train or learn about the previous Kage. His relationship with Sakura will grow more complex in order to bring him in line with his Orange Flash incarnation; the transition wouldn't make sense otherwise because Orange Flash Naruto is in love with Sakura. His doomed relationship with Haku will be his primary source of motivation to be the Hokage, because at first, he'll feel like he was forced onto his path and sort of apathetically walk toward it.

**16 Votes**

"_**Strong Idiot" Naruto**_: This Naruto isn't "_stupid_" per se, he just functions on the idea that; **"If it doesn't work, you didn't hit it hard enough."** What's makes him different from Canon!Naruto, is that he actually has the physical abilities to back up his brutish approach to life. Naruto's the strongest genin in the class, tied with Sasuke. Normally, this would have him put on another team for balancing purposes, but he's assigned to Team 7 because his high grades concerning his physical abilities don't average well with his abysmal grades in the more mental intensive categories (i.e. espionage, stealth, strategy, etc.) Hilarity ensues as Kakashi constantly tries and fails to teach Naruto the importance of finesse in shinobi life (i.e. that being a walking hammer doesn't make all of your problems nails). He'll get on Sasuke's nerves from time to time with his uncanny ability to solve everything with force. This version of Naruto will gradually balance out his skill set over the course of the story, this way, he'll be more in line with his older-self in the main story. Haku's death will cause him to reevaluate his approach to shinobi life, this forces him to place more emphasis on using his mind, as he'll feel that he could have saved Haku where he a more well-rounded ninja.

**10 Votes**

_**Delinquent Naruto: **_ This version is as close as I'll go to _Dark!_Naruto. He's brash, chirpy, confrontational, and **violently** temperamental. The entire class, save for Sasuke and Hinata is scared shitless of him. I believe Naruto has every right to be angry at the world, even in my canon with Kakashi, Jiraiya, and the 3rd Hokage as his surrogate family. While Naruto has been adequately provided for in my canon, his guardians still keep him in the dark, and by extension, at a distance. Because he can't know the truth of his lineage quite yet, and due to the fact that Naruto's guardians all had close relationships with his parents, Naruto has no one to talk to... he's just frustrated. His experience with Haku and Zabuza will mellow him out so that he gradually becomes more in sync with his personality in Orange flash.

**10 Votes**

"_**Two-Face" Naruto: **_This version of Naruto _**isn't**_ dark, hyper intelligent, or brooding _(leave that shit to Sasuke… or Batman… __**Dark!Naruto is ridiculous. Stop it.**__)_, this version merely has two distinct sides, happy go-lucky, and listless solitude. Kishimoto mentions it, but doesn't elaborate on such an important piece of Naruto as a character. I'll delve into his loneliness a bit more in this incarnation; Team 7 (except Kakashi) will generally hate his guts until they understand how truly damaged Naruto is as a person. For this Naruto, his complex nature is what sows the initial seeds of Sakura's attraction to him. His transition to the Naruto we see in Orange Flash will happen during the training trip as he learns to discard his mask and show the underneath (i.e. a matter of fake smiles vs. real ones).


	32. Chapter 32: Reunions III

AN: Alright! _Reunions III _is here. From now on, any time Team 7 is together, the chapter will be called Reunions. If you remember, Tsunade had a visitor, well, it's time for you to meet the mystery person. Let's go!

* * *

"... I've been informed that the Namikaze line has a successor... _at 15 years of age_. Why would you keep this from us for so long Tsunade-san? Must I find everything on my own?"

Tsunade popped the cork on the sake bottle as if she were a child opening a Christmas present. The Hokage chuckled to herself and gave her newest visitor

a nostalgic smirk.

She was a notably slender and statuesque lady, nearly six feet tall by Tsunade's guess; her raven hair had several streaks of silver in it, denoting her status as an older woman. It was tied up in a bun, but Tsunade could tell that it had to be at least waist length, judging from its volume. She wore a light blue kimono with a familiar symbol emblazoned on the back, a blossoming orange tree. Tsunade hadn't seen it in years.

Tsunade appeared slightly annoyed as she responded.

"It's nice to see you too, Yumi-san. We haven't seen each other since I patched up your daughter after the Chuunin Exams incident and it's already down to business? ... I assume it was her that told you about Naruto."

Yumi nodded. "Yes, Mitsuki is the one who alerted me to Naruto's survival… As I was saying, for what reason would you hide this from me until now? I'm aware that you've only been Hokage for a few years, but after Sarutobi-sama died, I would think that notifying me of a surviving Namikaze would be higher on your list of priorities."

Tsunade replied. "Security reasons really. Minato-kun had a lot of enemies from the war, so we needed to keep a lid on it at least until Naruto was strong enough to dissuade any sort of assassination attempt. In hindsight, maybe we could have told you, but at the time, we wanted this airtight, no possible breach of any kind. Imagine if someone had taken Mitsuki or Kouta hostage in order to obtain such pertinent information. "

Yumi frowned a bit but seemed to take the information in stride. She walked over to the window and stared down at Konoha.

"Perhaps you're right, bygones are bygones… I'll be moving back to Konoha within the week, would it trouble you too much to arrange a place for me?"

Tsunade got a devious smile about her, however, Yumi didn't notice. "Of course not. _I have the perfect place for you_... Speaking of which, how's Kouta doing? I haven't seen him in years."

Yumi groaned, her sophisticated tone of voice floated through the room like a musical performance. "…He ran off to Ni No Kuni to become one of those _brutish_ Samurai just before you became Hokage. He writes to Mitsuki from time to time, I now find myself checking in with her just to make sure he's still alive."

Tsunade looked genuinely surprised for a moment. "Really now? What's he doing all the way out there?"

Yumi shook her head in disbelief. "Do you remember Captain Mifune from the war?"

Tsunade nodded. "How could I forget?"

"For reasons unbeknownst to me, he's a general now… I'll give you one guess as to who his new attendant is."

Tsunade began to laugh out loud at the Irony of the situation; the heir of a once prominent ninja family running off to become a samurai was a perfect setup for a comedic theatrical production. Tsunade began to laugh even harder after imagining whom she'd cast in the roles… The Hokage would come to regret such an outburst almost immediately. There was a shattering noise, and then, there was the sound of liquid hitting the floor.

Tsunade looked down at her brand new bottle of Red Akai Sake, or what was left of it, which in this case happened to be the neck of the bottle.

Tsunade glowered at the arrow stuck in the far wall. "Yumi, was that really necessary?"

The green-eyed woman slowly lowered her bow and gave Tsunade a haughty smirk before turning back to the window. "... I hear that stains if you let it sit."

A vein on Tsunade's forehead started to pop out, she took a deep breath and held it. After a few seconds passed, the Hokage exhaled and tossed a red towel hanging on her chair onto the equally red spot on the floor.

Tsunade flung the bottleneck into a trashcan across the room and crossed her arms. "I'll let that one slide since admittedly, I had that coming… but you have to admit that it'd make for a great comedy production at the cinema."

Yumi mirrored the Hokage. "_Yes, let's continue to discuss the farce otherwise known as my motherhood… I think I'll __**pass**__ dear._"

Tsunade smirked and rocked on her desk slightly. "To be honest, I miss our bitchy conversations. We should make this a weekly thing!"

* * *

Kakashi peered down at what was left of Deidara's torso; his lower body appeared to have been cleanly removed. Kakashi's mangekyo slowly spun back to normal and he slung Gaara over his shoulder, he began to leave, but stopped dead in his tracks when he came face to face with Kabuto, who smirked back.

"Thanks for the assist Kakashi. Couldn't have done this without you."

Kakashi stared back in silence, as if gauging Kabuto.

Kabuto stared as well, and after a short interval he raised an eyebrow and prepared to jump away.

"… I'll be leaving then."

Kabuto turned to jump away, and at the last possible moment, he tossed a poison gas grenade at Kakashi and Gaara, in the hopes that he'd prioritize keeping Gaara alive over capturing him. Kakashi jumped away from the cloud immediately, and Kabuto began to jump away, but he young man never even left the ground; a torrent of blood began to leak from a gaping hole in his chest cavity. A Kakashi clone had been tailing them and unceremoniously used the chidori to assassinate the sound jonin, there was a sickening sound as the clone ripped its hand from Kabuto's body.

Kakashi dispelled his helper and turned around to survey the situation, and what he saw startled him… very much so…

After the poison gas cloud was taken away by the wind, it was very apparent that Deidara's corpse was _gone_; a trail of blood leading into the forest confirmed that. However, he knew for a fact that he'd killed the Akatsuki member, so Deidara couldn't have crawled away. Kakashi then turned to Kabuto's body, he kneeled down and inspected it, upon a closer examination, he could see a thin seam going up the side of Kabuto's face.

The copycat ninja scraped at it and pulled hard, Kabuto's face tore off cleanly, revealing an entirely different man's face. Kakashi very briefly considered hunting Kabuto down with his ninken, but Gaara appeared to be succumbing to her injuries and chakra exhaustion as well. Without any sort of treatment and sustenance, she'd likely die, and Kakashi wasn't one to fall short when he was so close to the finish line. Kakashi groaned in mild annoyance and jumped into the trees to take Gaara back to the outpost.

En route to his destination, Kakashi hailed Naruto on the communicator.

"_Naruto? Come in. Naruto. I've got the Kazekage."_

Naruto let out a sigh of relief. _"… Thank you... Kakashi-sensei."_

"_Naruto? … You don't sound too good. Need any help?"_

"_Nah… just… tired. An assist couldn't hurt though... How's Gaara-chan?"_

"_She's fine, exhausted but fine."_

"_And that blonde guy?"_

"… _Dead…"_

Naruto coughed up some trace amounts of blood and frowned at the boulder next to him. "You don't sound too sure of that."

"_Deidara's dead, but I get the feeling we'll be seeing more of him in the future."_

Naruto growled. _"… Edo-tensei... You let Kabuto get away with the body? I can understand you giving Sasuke the benefit of the doubt that one time, but Kabuto?"_

Kakashi frowned. _"I didn't __**let**__ him do anything, turns out he was using that confusing reanimation technique of his the entire time. In reality, I killed one of those Kabuto body doubles and he slipped away with Deidara's corpse in the confusion."_

Naruto struggled to move the boulder out of his way, but to no avail, his body was too weak, not to mention the blood loss made him feel eternally dizzy.

"_I'm gonna to personally ensure that jutsu goes extinct, I never wanna see it again."_

Kakashi agreed. _"Let's take things one step at a time Naruto. Gaara's alive, but she's not going to be like that for long, I know you'd want me to prioritize her first, so I'll be a while."_

Naruto winced as he slowly, but surely formed a rasengan with both his hands. _"I got it."_

* * *

Between Sakura's strength and Sasuke's curse seal powered jutsu, Sasori was finding himself unable to withstand the combined assault of Sakura and Sasuke.

The puppet master fired a torrent of liquid nitrogen from one of his mouth nozzles, forcing Sasuke and Sakura to jump to their sides. Sasuke took the opportunity to pepper the area with small fireballs; his plan was to set up another Kirin strike.

Sasori charged Sasuke on his spider legs, attempting to impale him on the sharpened tips. Sasuke, courtesy of his sharingan, was able to weave and spin around the attacks with ease.

Sasori caught the tiny smirk on Sasuke's face and fired his second mouth nozzle at the Uchiha. It fired a senbon needle, which Sasuke managed to deflect with his sword; it stuck in the wall behind him. There was a short pause before the needle exploded; the yield of said explosion was comparable to a firecracker.

Sasuke and Sakura made mental notes to avoid being hit by these explosives and continued to carefully prod Sasori's defenses. The puppet master rapid-fired the needles, alternating between targeting Sasuke and Sakura. Sasuke of course effortlessly dodged the incoming explosives without so much as a change in expression, he almost looked bored to the casual spectator.

Mid flip, Sasuke funneled some lighning chakra into some shuriken and threw them at various weak points on Sasori's body. However, the man, or what was left of him, made it a point to replace all his skin with armored plates, Sasuke's shuriken stuck into the puppet master's body, but failed to pierce any of the armor. AS for the shuriken that hit Sasori's spider legs, they just bounced off.

Sasuke narrowed his eyes at this new bit of information; he'd need a more powerful cutting tool than shuriken to disable those legs. He didn't have much time to process this important information however, since Sasori spun his head and flamethrower armtoward Sakura, while keeping the water cannon trained on Sasuke.

Sakura dodged the initial volley of explosive projectiles and fire, but Sasori led his target correctly, the wall of freezing air approached her. Sasuke had done a long misty flip in order to dodge the high pressure beam of water, he landed on the far wall and pushed off at an incredible speed, he went through some familiar hand seals.

_Katon: Gokakyu no Jutsu!_

Sasuke launched a massive fireball at Sakura, which would have killed her if it weren't for the fact that she was being encased in ice. The temperature extremes cancelled each other out, saving Sakura from an icy death at the hands of the abomination that was Sasori.

Sasuke roughly grabbed her and shoved her behind him and readied his sword. "Pay attention Sakura. I'm not doing that for you again… Follow my lead unless you have a death wish…" Sasuke spun his tomoe, closely scanning and evaluating Sasori's mobility.

"… We'll run Pincer Maneuver 2, that's the only one that works without the idiot."

Sakura gave Sasuke a flustered nod while she reflexively healed a few of Sasuke's cuts and scratches; she couldn't bring herself to thank him out loud, as if fearing some sort of rejection. The pinkette was still reeling from the fact that he was close enough to touch, within reach even… well, at least from her perspective.

Despite his lack of human body language, it was obvious that Sasori was having trouble deciding whom to attack. Sakura was less of an immediate threat to him, so it'd be easier to fight Sasuke if he took her out, however, the time it would require would allow the Uchiha boy to land a decisive blow.

Sakura drew two kunai and charged Sasori, he fired a torrent of explosive and poison needles, Sakura juked to the side and continued charging, her eyes shifted to Sasuke, hoping he'd taken the cue to get in an attack on Sasori's blind side.

Sasori raised himself higher into the air with his spider legs and fired his rope dart at Sakura, she deflected it with her left kunai, tossing that same kunai at him soon after. Sasori swatted it away with his palm and tried to retract his rope dart, but that was only the exact thing she's hoped he would do. Sakura stomped on the tip of the dart and anchored herself to the ground with her chakra. The medic recalled the basics of her extremely breif elemental affinity training and flashed through a few hand signs. Sakura slapped the ground; she was launched into the air by a pillar of rock.

Her foot was still on top of Sasori's rope dart, so naturally, he was dragged into the air by this stone pillar. Thinking quickly, Sasori detached the rope dart turret from his stomach cavity, causing him to fall from the sky. The redhead inwardly groaned, he knew what was coming next, he spun his head 180 degrees and saw Sasuke approaching with a chidori in his left hand, and a crackling chokuto in his right.

Sasori fired his mouth nozzles at Sasuke, but the boy was too quick, he twisted in mid air, dodging the freezing liquid and the needles respectively. Sasuke swung his chidori and it met the resistance of Sasori's spider legs, however, they weren't intended to deal with such a threat and were blasted to pieces. Sasuke's left hand had discharged its lightning chakra, but his sword was still loaded, so he swung it, but Sasori had managed to fire another salvo of needles just beforehand, forcing Sasuke to dodge in the middle of his attack. Sasuke intended to vertically bisect the puppet master, but instead, he only managed to cut off Sasori's right arm, the water cannon to be more exact.

Sasuke continued his trajectory upward, landing on the top of the pillar with Sakura. He nodded at her and she dived from the top of the pillar, building as much chakra into her fists as possible. By the time she made it to Sasori, both her fists and her entire body were covered in a thin blue aura of chakra. Sasori, fired a blast of fire at Sakura, but she was falling too quickly for the heat to do any damage, the puppet master brought his legs and left arm inward in hopes of blocking some of the damage.

"_SHANNAROOOOOO!"_

Sakura's fists connected… solidly.

There was crashing noise, and then, an explosion of rock and dust, the ground splintered and boulders flew everywhere, if the ceiling hadn't already been caved in, it would have done so for sure then. The shockwaves and flying rocks forced Sasuke to use his sword to defend himself. Eventually, the stone pillar gave way when the fissures reached it, Sasuke jumped down and landed next to Sakura with barely a sound to be made.

Sasori's left arm and leg were completely destroyed, while his right leg was twisted at an angle that'd make a normal person howl in agony.

Sasuke sheathed his sword and walked over to Sasori's twitching frame, he stooped down and grabbed Sasori's heart core, pulling it. The core began to slowly come out of the puppet master's chest. Sasori futiley tried to fire his weapons at Sasuke, but his body was far too damaged to be combat-functional. Sasuke slammed his foot on Sasori's chin, making it impossible for him to aim his mouth nozzles at Sasuke. The Uchiha boy ignored Sasori's futile attempts to hold his heart core inside his chest while it was being tugged out.

"Hn. So this is how I die? ... Would you like to hear a tale?"

Sasuke blankly stared down at the puppet. "The idiot was right, you do talk to much."

Sakura started to approach Sasuke.

"Sasuke wait! You don't have to kill him! We can-"

Sakura was cut off by the sickening sound of Sasori's heart core being ripped from his torso. The man's body tensed and twitched for a few seconds and then… it went limp, clattering to the ground like the lifeless puppet it was supposed to be. Despite Sasori being a puppet, Sakura shuddered as she could see the life drain from his eyes, which eventually glazed over.

Sakura stared at Sasuke, bewildered, her thoughts concerning her first love were interrupted when she heard the shuddering of rock. She looked to the crevice she hid Naruto in and the boulder seemed to be shaking and crumbling, it fell into thousands of pieces to reveal a slightly winded, and also slightly bloody Naruto. The rasengan in his hand dispersed into wisps of chakra.

Sakura stomped and the entire cave shook, she yelled at her teammate in hysteria

"WOULD YOU STAY PUT BEFORE YOU KILL YOURSELF?!"

Naruto vomited up some leftover blood, despite the extreme pain he was in, Naruto paid her question no mind, Sakura considered it a miracle he could even stand up on his own at this point, let alone still use chakra after all the damage he'd sustained. Naruto's eyes were focused on Sasuke, who was walking toward him. The blonde yelled at his teammate.

"You think this is over _teme_? We've got a score to settle!"

Sasuke scoffed at Naruto. "Look at you, you can barely stand on your own… you know, you weren't even supposed to get this far. After what you've been through today, do you really think you're in any shape to fight me right now?"

Naruto began to glow red, but Sasuke's next jab somewhat diffused the increasingly tense situation.

The Uchiha smirked taunted the weakened Uzumaki. "So… you and Gaara? I guess you jincuuriki run in packs."

The blonde took an aggressive step forward, but immediately fell to his knee; Naruto could tell that Sasuke was enjoying his chance to mock him.

"You don't know her like I do, _teme_! Piss off!"

Sasuke maintained his air of cool superiority and mocked his severely weakened rival. "We had a bet, remember? I called it the day we met her during the Chuunin Exams."

Naruto scoffed rolled his eyes. "Oh, you want food? Eat a foodpill. I'm more inclined to stab you than feed you... I swear, if I had the energy, I'd knock your teeth down your throat."

"Hn, whatever... You're lucky Orochimaru said to leave you alive, _dobe_." Sasuke turned to leave and froze when Sakura blocked his path.

She stared him dead in the eye, giving him a serious look.

"Sasuke-kun."

The Uchiha in question stood there silently and stared, waiting for her question. Naruto gagged a bit and struggled to his feet.

Naruto's scratchy voice rang out above the silence. "Oh yeah… _**this**_ is happening right now, I'm gonna go see Gaara-chan before I puke… You two lovebirds have some catching up to do!"

Naruto limped out of the cavern, or so they thought. The Naruto that exited the cavern was, in reality, a shadow clone.

Sakura gave Sasuke a stern glare. "I know you tried to kill Naruto that day… When you left."

Sasuke gave her a dismissive stare. "What of it?"

Sakura gave him a bewildered look. "What of it? What's happened to you, Sasuke? You used to-"

Sasuke continued staring down at her with a blank expression. "Used to what? … **What could you possibly know about me**? You've never lost anything that truly mattered to you."

Sakura shook her head in disagreement. "I lost **you**."

Sasuke raised his eyebrow. "Really now? Did my departure from your life truly have such an effect on you at the core level? What if the Idiot didn't return from a dangerous mission? How would that change you?"

Sakura opened her mouth, but shut it immediately, Sasuke was starting to make her question herself.

"You may not feel like it, but I'm just a footnote in your life, you have absolutely no reason to feel this way about me, yet you're still here, holding on to these childish notions of yours."

Sakura fidgeted. "Do I really need a reason to love you, Sasuke? I just want you back in my life."

"In most cases, **no**... However, given the circumstances of your so called feelings for me, yes, you _do_ need a reason. What made you any different from those other girls that became ninja solely to follow me around and gossip? Your "love" for me is based upon a shallow premise... one, that on principle, I can't accept."

Despite his cold and distant demeanor, Sasuke still had something of a soft spot for the medic, so he offered an olive branch... Well, as much a branch as someone like Sasuke could offer.

"...Yes, I thanked you once, but you didn't get my meaning. Sakura, if I were even remotely interested in finding someone right now, she'd have to understand me as a person, something you never bothered yourself to do."

Sakura began to turn pink in anger and glared as she started to become frustrated.

"Sasuke, YOU MATTERED TO ME, and you made it seem like I mattered to you! All those times you saved me, only to ignore me shortly after? What about our first day as a team? That conversation we had on the bench about my forehead, the Forest of Death? WHAT DID ANY OF THAT MEAN SASUKE?! WAS I HALLUCINATING OR SOMETHING?!"

Sasuke got a strange, unreadable look on his face, perhaps it was his way of expressing confusion. "…Perhaps you were."

Sakura felt deflated, Sasuke didn't even remember what he'd said to her that day. Her astonishment bottomed out when Sasuke's voice interrupted her frantic thoughts.

He had a blank sort of disbelief on his face; he seemed more annoyed/astonished than intrigued. "So… you still '_love'_ me?"

Sakura grabbed her head in confusion and started pacing in anxiety. "I don't know! Yes? … Maybe?"

Sasuke glared at her. "**Well don't**. You're wasting your time on someone like me, there's no room in my heart for things like that… Just go and be with Naruto instead, the idiot's hopelessly in love with you. Can you not see that? _**He's**_ the one that can give you what you're looking for, not me."

Sakura took another step forward.

Sakura's fist was so tight her knuckles cracked, she started to feel like she was about to cry. "And where's that coming from Sasuke? Do you hate me now… is that it?"

Sasuke shook his head in disapproval. "That's not the case, if I hated you, you'd be dead... I just don't have any particularly romantic feelings toward you, and I can't understand why you'd feel so strongly about me."

Sakura was holding back her tears with all her might. "Sasuke-kun… But I-"

The Uchiha boy took a step backward and interrupted the pinkette. "Please… Sakura, have you ever considered the fact that people like me don't _**get**_ happy endings? My path only has two outcomes, death, or isolation, and I refuse to drag anyone else into it. This is **my burden**, **my story..**. and if you get in my way, I'll kill you like the rest. That bond we shared as Team 7? Yes, it was real, but at the end of the day, it means _**nothing**_ in the face of my ambition."

Sasuke's eyes went red and the tomoe began to spin, it was obvious to Sakura that he was becoming annoyed now, she shrunk completely. Naruto, despite his injuries, felt an adrenaline rush and poised himself to intervene if necessary, the blossoming and headstrong girl Sakura was becoming, appeared to revert back to the child he knew all those years ago, a despair-ridden notion of darkness was radiating from Sasuke as he spoke.

"I've moved on, and so should you. I don't need **EITHER** of you in my life anymore. These bonds you and the _dobe _speak of are weaknesses, nothing more, that's why I cut my ties with you."

Sakura mustered up some courage and gingerly grabbed Sasuke's hand as he turned to leave. He could have easily snatched his hand out of her grip, but he instead froze, his back was to the medic.

"Sasuke-kun, I love you. I've loved you ever since we started the academy. Why is that so hard for you to understand?"

Sasuke's back was to her, he turned to her with an annoyed expression, and with a single word, he stopped Sakura cold in her tracks.

"… _**Why?"**_

Sakura stopped breathing and froze; she slowly loosened her grip on Sasuke's hand, yet remained silent. Sasuke, genuinely wanting an answer from the pinkette, drilled her again.

"_**Why? **_Why do you love me Sakura? Give me _**your**_ reason, _**not theirs**_. Those girls were shallow, just like these feelings of yours are. You spent a lot of time around me when we were younger... but did you ever see me for what I truly was? Be honest."

Sakura's mind froze, no matter how she thought about it, she couldn't find a legitimate answer to his question. It had essentially been part of her personality for so long, she couldn't remember the reasoning behind it.

"B-because I… You… We…"

Sasuke glared at her and he subconsciously began releasing small arcs of electricity from his skin. Sakura's finger was stung by one of the arcs and she reflexively yanked her hand back, she cowered beneath the negative emotions emanating from the young Uchiha.

"You don't know the first _**damned**_ thing about me, what I enjoy, what I dream of at night, my greatest fears, my darkest secrets… You're no different than all those shallow women- **no, **_**children**_, back in Konoha. **You just don't get it, do you? What could** **YOU **_**possibly**_** offer me, that could erode away the pain I still feel to this very day?**"

Even more electricity began to arc off of Sasuke's body, he was becoming even more annoyed.

"It's pathetic really, **_Naruto_** understands me more than any of you ever will; **yet he too knows nothing of the injustices I've suffered.** You're just like _**them**__,_ they've sold themselves on this asinine fairy tail that they can fix me with love…"

Sakura, began to lose what little composure she had left when Sasuke interrupted her after his short pause.

"Tell me Sakura. What makes you think **you** can heal me? Is it because you've learned a bit of medical ninjutsu?"

Sakura wasn't exactly crying, yet, but the tears were rolling down her face. She tried to reply, but her voice only left her mouth in tiny fragments.

"You have nothing. Don't you? Doesn't **true love conquer all**?" Sasuke spat on the ground to further punctuate his statement. "The entire concept makes me want to vomit."

Sakura was crying now, she shakily grabbed his hand as her tears fell even faster. "S-Sasuke? Please… just hear me ou-"

Sasuke coldly snatched his hand out of hers. "Just leave me alone, this is your only warning Sakura._**"**_

Sakura stuttered over her words, her sobbing making it impossible for her to speak. Her voice shrunk with each syllable, becoming more and more distraught as well.

"S-Sasuke-kun… I… I… _I…" _

"_**-tch- You're annoying."**_

With that, he tucked Sasori's heart core beneath his armpit and sprinted away at a speed Sakura could never hope to follow.

_'I'm... Annoying.'_

Once again, these all too familiar words echoed through Sakura's mind. Her world began to collapse in on itself as Sasuke drew further away. Despite her best efforts, Sakura failed completely to hold herself together after realizing, that in just a few short minutes, everything she worked toward for the past two and a half years came crashing down on her head.

Sakura sniffled and continued sobbing, her mind piecing together what had just happened.

'… I guess I'm just always a step behind the curve… _What's worse is… even after all that… __**I think I still love him.**__'_

The pain and confusion of the last few minutes made Sakura's tears flow even faster. She didn't know what exactly was making her cry. Was it the fact that she still felt so strongly for him after what he said to her? Was it the possibility that Naruto felt like she was stringing him along? Was it the fact that her heart was now being torn in two different directions? Who knows? Women and emotions are kind of a black box; there's the input and output, the in-between part was up to anyone's guess.

Naruto stared intently from a shadowy spot on the wall, he could feel his heart beginning to ache out of sympathy. He looked off in Sasuke's direction and briefly considered going after him, but after seeing his heated exchange with Sakura, he figured that she just wasn't ready to face him even if he managed to capture the bastard and bring him back… and this was assuming Naruto had enough left in him to fight his rival and win.

Such an assumption obviously wasn't the case.

Naruto began to climb down so he could comfort Sakura, but his tenant shot that idea down right away.

'_**Kit. Don't. You. Dare. If you so much as talk to her right now, I'll flood your chakra coils and pop you like a balloon. I swear, I'll off us both. Let the pink one sort out her issues on her own, now's not the time for you to talk to her.'**_

Naruto gave Sakura a worried look.

'_But she's hurting… she needs me right now…'_

'_**Don't you think you've done enough for the pink female today? Go. Find the Shukaku's container, isn't that what you came here to do in the first place?'**_

'_But I- … Fine, but just this once.'_

Naruto gave Sakura one last look of concern before discreetly slipping out of the cavern. The Suna assault team came zooming past Naruto as he walked through the caves toward the exit.

Naruto began to question the validity of his promise to the girl he fell in love with after seeing how Sasuke truly felt about her. Naruto stumbled into a brisk walk as he emerged from the cave's mouth.

'… _Is this really what you want, Sakura-chan? Do you really want me to bring him back to you?'_

_Reunions III; FIN_

* * *

AN: I had another cutaway scene prepared, but I didn't make much sense for the chapter. This seemed like the best place to end things anyway.

It took me a while to get Sasuke and Sakura's interaction right, but I think I got the point across. In my canon Sasuke actually does have a soft spot for Sakura, and is going to be significantly less violent in his dealings with her, as you can see. However, that's not really saying much, especially since he's in a dark place right now, also, Sakura's feelings for Sasuke won't just disappear, as I'm sure you can understand by now. I'm doing this primarily because Sakura is kind of the ignition key for the endgame, if she suddenly starts pursuing Naruto, it'd cause quite a few problems with the events I have planned, so I'm gonna have her trapped in the middle for a bit longer.

Breath of the Wiz

~ _Signin' Off_

* * *

The spread of votes has stayed about the same since last chapter, however, they've all increased.

**26 Votes**

"_**Hokage or Bust" Naruto:**_ This potential portrayal will make Naruto more of the _"Pampered Orphan" _variety, a la Young Bruce Wayne. In my canon, Kakashi, Jiraiya, and the 3rd Hokage are much bigger parts of Naruto's early life, and in this portrayal _specifically_; they're actively grooming him to be the Hokage one day. He'll still be a hyperactive prankster, but he'll also be a bit more goal oriented, even going so far as to blow off a _mildly_ interested Sakura to train or learn about the previous Kage. His relationship with Sakura will grow more complex in order to bring him in line with his Orange Flash incarnation; the transition wouldn't make sense otherwise because Orange Flash Naruto is in love with Sakura. His doomed relationship with Haku will be his primary source of motivation to be the Hokage, because at first, he'll feel like he was forced onto his path and sort of apathetically walk toward it.

**18 Votes**

"_**Strong Idiot" Naruto**_: This Naruto isn't "_stupid_" per se, he just functions on the idea that; **"If it doesn't work, you didn't hit it hard enough."** What's makes him different from Canon!Naruto, is that he actually has the physical abilities to back up his brutish approach to life. Naruto's the strongest genin in the class, tied with Sasuke. Normally, this would have him put on another team for balancing purposes, but he's assigned to Team 7 because his high grades concerning his physical abilities don't average well with his abysmal grades in the more mental intensive categories (i.e. espionage, stealth, strategy, etc.) Hilarity ensues as Kakashi constantly tries and fails to teach Naruto the importance of finesse in shinobi life (i.e. that being a walking hammer doesn't make all of your problems nails). He'll get on Sasuke's nerves from time to time with his uncanny ability to solve everything with force. This version of Naruto will gradually balance out his skill set over the course of the story, this way, he'll be more in line with his older-self in the main story. Haku's death will cause him to reevaluate his approach to shinobi life, this forces him to place more emphasis on using his mind, as he'll feel that he could have saved Haku where he a more well-rounded ninja.

**11 Votes**

_**Delinquent Naruto: **_ This version is as close as I'll go to _Dark!_Naruto. He's brash, chirpy, confrontational, and **violently** temperamental. The entire class, save for Sasuke and Hinata is scared shitless of him. I believe Naruto has every right to be angry at the world, even in my canon with Kakashi, Jiraiya, and the 3rd Hokage as his surrogate family. While Naruto has been adequately provided for in my canon, his guardians still keep him in the dark, and by extension, at a distance. Because he can't know the truth of his lineage quite yet, and due to the fact that Naruto's guardians all had close relationships with his parents, Naruto has no one to talk to... he's just frustrated. His experience with Haku and Zabuza will mellow him out so that he gradually becomes more in sync with his personality in Orange flash.

**11 Votes**

"_**Two-Face" Naruto: **_This version of Naruto _**isn't**_ dark, hyper intelligent, or brooding _(leave that shit to Sasuke… or Batman… __**Dark!Naruto is ridiculous. Stop it.**__)_, this version merely has two distinct sides, happy go-lucky, and listless solitude. Kishimoto mentions it, but doesn't elaborate on such an important piece of Naruto as a character. I'll delve into his loneliness a bit more in this incarnation; Team 7 (except Kakashi) will generally hate his guts until they understand how truly damaged Naruto is as a person. For this Naruto, his complex nature is what sows the initial seeds of Sakura's attraction to him. His transition to the Naruto we see in Orange Flash will happen during the training trip as he learns to discard his mask and show the underneath (i.e. a matter of fake smiles vs. real ones).


	33. Chapter 33: A Roll In the Dust

AN: _**Quick reminder, if you've stated your wish/voting decision for Prologue Orange in the form of a review, make sure to enter it in the poll at the top of my profile page.**_ Otherwise, your vote won't count toward the total. Now that the Suna arc is winding down, we can get back to more shenanigans/idiocy for a while, a much longer stretch this time around as well, primarily because everyone's in play now. I hope you all are as excited as I am! Also, as some of you have messaged me, I had to can my Guilty Crown fic, I'll put it back up again in the future, so it's not completely dead, but I wanna prioritize Orange Flash for the time being, and I can't bring myself to continue writing Butterfly Effect right now.

* * *

Sakura was sitting on top of a demolished boulder, watching the Suna reserve forces sweep the cave and secure the area. There was a medic tending to her relatively minor bruises and cuts, though, thanks to Naruto and Sasuke, they were barely worth noting.

She looked to be around the same age as Sakura, if not slightly younger than the pinkette. She appeared to be engaging in small talk, at least based on her body language and lip movements. Sakura didn't really care; she had other things on her mind.

Sakura was snapped from her thoughts when she felt a sudden jolt of pain, the medic was pressing on one of her bruises.

"Oi, pinky. I asked you a question. You concussed?"

Sakura hung her head a bit and apologized in a hushed tone.

"I was askin' you if the really cute blonde guy you came with was yours."

Sakura sighed, but she figured a new perspective on her situation would help. "M-mine? I… The answer to that is complicated."

The medic chuckled under her breath. "Complicated? Sounds like it'd make for a good book one day."

Sakura shuddered at the thought of a book based on Naruto's love life and hoped such a thing would never see the light of day… too little to late in regards to that.

"Well, when we were younger, that blonde guy… Naruto-kun and I were placed on the same genin team. Naruto had a crush on me, I had a crush on our third member, and all he could think about was training and learning new jutsu. It was the worst kind of love triangle, and I think our sensei got a kick out of it. It seriously screwed with our chemistry, resulting in our team being formally disbanded after an incident involving our third man… After which, Naruto made a promise to me, and carrying it out is hurting him, but he's doing it for my sake. It's uplifting, but at the same time, I feel like it's tearing me apart from the inside. Some days, I feel like he's too good for me, I feel like I can't even look him in the eye from time to time. It just… hurts. Yet, when I'm with him I feel..."

Sakura trailed off and began considering the possibilities for the aftermath of this promise of theirs, most of these outcomes appeared dire at best.

The other girl cut her off mid thought. "Is this really such a difficult decision? Just keep it simple. You should think about which one you'd rather lose, whatever this Naruto-guy promised you, or Naruto himself."

Sakura sighed. "If that's the case, I'm liable to lose both with the way things are going."

"Then I'll ask ya again, in a different way. Which one means more to you?"

Sakura twitched a little bit, her attitude sunk downward immediately. "I… I honestly don't know. Right now, I feel like I need to do a lot of reflecting… re-evaluate a lot of my feelings."

"… Hm. I don't have anything better to do, let's start from the beginning. What's he like?"

Sakura suddenly perked up and chuckled to herself. "He's always been a bit… different."

* * *

_Sakura stared impatiently at Naruto while he made his mile-long order of ramen to the chef, the stand was called Ichi-something or other. Sakura wasn't exactly a fan of ramen, but she had to admit the menu looked pretty top notch, maybe because it was gourmet-style as opposed to store-bought._

"_Naruto… what's your angle? Why'd you drag me out here?"_

_Naruto put the menu down and gave her a stupid-looking grin. "I did it 'cause I think you're pretty… which is really the only thing I know about you and I wanna change that dattebayo!"_

_Sakura paused for a moment and turned back to her menu and thought to herself about how exactly she ended up going on a semi-date with Naruto. Going back over her day, Sasuke had abruptly and succinctly shot her down when she asked if he wanted to hang out, so it wasn't like she had anywhere better to be._

_Sakura groaned inwardly. "Thanks I guess… Well as you know, I'm Sakura Haruno, and yes, this is my natural perm, not a dye job… And also-"_

_Sakura looked at Naruto, who seemed genuinely surprised as he interrupted. "Really?! Your hair's naturally pink? I thought you were actually a blonde or something!"_

_Sakura sneered at Naruto slightly. "Naruto, what kind of person dyes their __**eyebrows**__ pink? … Baka."_

_Naruto laughed and rubbed the back of his head. "Hahaha! That's right! I guess that's pretty silly when ya think about it! My bad for interrupting though, continue with your story!"_

_Sakura's eyes narrowed a bit and she continued. "Well, I enjoy-"_

"_Trivia games and puzzles..." _

_Naruto technically interrupted again, though this time, his demeanor was completely different from his previous interruption. He spoke underneath his breath, though it was quiet enough at the ramen stand for Sakura to hear him._

_The pinkette would've gotten mad if it weren't for the fact that Naruto was completely right._

"_How do you even… that's-"_

"_Creepy?"_

_Sakura's arms crossed and she slid away from Naruto a bit. "… Yes. Yes it is."_

_Naruto sighed and scratched his head. "Sorry about that, it's… kinda this thing I do when I get to know people better."_

_Sakura crossed her arms. "That doesn't explain why you know I like puzzles."_

_Naruto grabbed Sakura's wrist and gently pulled it in front of his face, and before she even realized what he'd done he'd slid the ring off of her right middle-finger._

_Naruto examined it with his characteristic grin. "This is a puzzle ring isn't it? Whenever you're nerv- … talking to Sasuke-teme, you fiddle with it, and whenever we have team meetings, you like to take it apart and reassemble it in different configurations. Also, your pendant isn't just a pendant; it's a vortex puzzle! … The trivia thing though? That's obvious! I remember in class you were always the first to have answers whenever Mizuki-sensei asked questions, so you probably enjoy that sorta thing!"_

_Sakura was at a loss for words when Naruto placed the ring back in her hand and grinned._

"_See, not creepy! You're just easy to pay attention to, that's all!"_

_Sakura sputtered for a few seconds and eventually started to blush. _

_Just then, Teuchi brought out their orders and smiled at the newly-minted genin. He placed the dozen or so bowls on the counter before he crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow at Naruto._

"_I been meanin' to ask… This lucky lady your girlfriend Naruto?"_

_Sakura turned slightly pinker and shook her head vigorously. "No sir, it's-"_

_Naruto looked at Sakura, smiled, and then looked back at Teuchi. He cut her off again, this time intentionally. _

"_Nah, not yet, Old Man… She'll come around eventually!" Naruto grinned and gave Sakura a playful shove._

_Sakura sighed and smiled a bit in defeat, her thoughts echoed the situation._

'_He's so weird...'_

* * *

The medic grinned at Sakura. "Oh you lucky bi-"

An errant rock exploded beneath Sakura's grip. "Don't finish that sentence."

The other girl recoiled slightly. "Sorry. Just… shit you're strong... He's head-over-heels for you, and judgin' from your story it seems like he's been that way since before his balls dropped. What's so difficult about this decision? I can tell you feel the same way about him."

Sakura sighed and took her puzzle ring out of her ninja pouch, she replied, examining the silver jewelry.

"Yeah, I know, but it's just like I said. I have some serious thinking to do concerning all this… Everything I've been doing for nearly three years has just been brought into serious contention. Very little of it makes sense now, and the feelings I have right now make me feel like there's something seriously wrong with me…"

Sakura's expression sunk lower and lower as she continued to speak, she couldn't stop thinking about what this journey would do to Naruto, and if he'd come out the other side as the same person she was falling in love with… or even if he'd come out of it alive.

Sakura put her face in her hands and groaned; she'd have started crying again if she weren't so emotionally drained from the past 24 hours of her life.

From the night she spent with Naruto in her arms, to Jiraiya's warning to her about waiting too long with her decision, to Naruto saving her life time and again, then, seeing just how much Haku's death affected the blonde jinchuuriki. Sakura had never felt so lost in her life. The emptiness ate at her soul, and she once again felt powerless to stop her life from spiraling out of control again.

'_Stupid emotions… They never act the way they're supposed to.'_

* * *

Naruto plopped himself down on a cot in the medical tent back at the checkpoint, the nurses and medical staff stared at him incredulously, Naruto stared back, looking worn out and slightly annoyed.

The staring continued, so Naruto groaned and took a deep breath, he held it for a moment, and then intentionally coughed. A cloud of blood sprayed from his mouth and several staff members immediately came rushing over to examine him, they propped him up slightly in his medical cot with some pillows.

It was here that Naruto noticed Mitsuki staring at him, or maybe through him. She didn't quite look like she was "all there", she eventually made eye contact with Naruto and smiled a bit while he was being examined. Naruto smiled back, though this smile was forced, Mitsuki could tell and she gave him a worried look. Naruto sighed and mouthed 'it's Sakura' to his bodyguard; she gave him a dazed nod and started staring at the ceiling with an ambiguous frown on her face.

The doctors and nurses worked effortlessly and efficiently, and after determining that Naruto's blood-pressure was stable, and that his internal bleeding was relatively minor, they hooked him up to a blood IV just in case, as well as giving him a canteen of water and some food as well. Naruto inhaled his food at a rapid pace and took a swig of water before turning his head over to look at Mitsuki, who appeared to be massaging her temples.

"Mitsuki-chan. How're you feeling?"

"… I feel fine, Namikaze-sama."

Naruto frowned slightly at his bodyguard, who sighed and smiled a tiny bit.

"Sorry… You prefer I call you Naruto now, right? … It'll take some getting used to, but I'll manage… By the way, how'd the mission go? I can only recall a few separate occaisions since we left Konoha… Sakura-san isn't hurt is she?"

Naruto smiled a tiny bit. "No it's fine, the mission went over smoothly, It's just… I made a promise to Sakura a long time ago because I fell in love with her, but now, I'm not so sure if this promise of ours is a valid one anymore."

Mitsuki straightened up slightly, her interest piqued. "I've never heard this before... Yeah… what's up with you and Sakura? For someone who designates your relationship as a platonic one, she's awfully possessive of you…"

Naruto chuckled a bit. "Yeah, I noticed. You really threw her for a loop while we were camped at that Oasis! Concussions are crazy things aren't they?"

Mitsuki closed her eyes and smirked. "What concussion? Maybe I just wanted to get under her skin…"

Naruto's eyes widened and he stared incredulously at his bodyguard.

"Waitwhat?"

Mitsuki opened her eyes and started to chuckle at Naruto's reaction before wincing slightly at the throbbing in her head.

Naruto continued to look at her in suspicion. "Mitsuki-chan, how many fingers am I holding up?"

Mitsuki grunted and closed her eyes again. "… Four? … Relax, I'm just messing with you. I was totally delirious… though in hindsight, how do you feel about cocktail dresses?"

Naruto was visibly worried… he was only holding up two fingers when he asked her to look.

"What's a cocktail dress look like?"

Mitsuki sighed and pinched Naruto's cheek. "Nevermind."

Naruto's eye twitched, he always felt like everyone knew something he didn't, he'd now have to figure out what a cocktail dress looked like.

"Mitsuki-chaaaan…You know I can't tell whether or not you're joking half the time! … By the way, it was two fingers."

Mitsuki sighed and squeezed the bridge of her nose; the throbbing in her skull was beginning to annoy her. "So, what kind of history do you have with Sakura-san? I can't read her like I can with you, and she's not gonna tell me what's up."

Naruto took a deep breath and drank some more water. "Well, it was about three years ago when things started to get awkward on Team 7… Between my escalating rivalry with Sasuke, and my feelings toward Sakura-chan, It was a sort of-"

Naruto was cut off when Baki appeared in the middle of the room, he looked at Naruto and strolled over.

"Naruto. The Kazekage has been stabilized."

"Awesome! I'll go visit her in the hospital later tonight then, yeah?"

Baki immediately shook his head, visibly nervous. "She's awake **now **and she wants to see you **immediately**… She's getting impatient, Naruto. I need you to go see her before she causes a sandstorm, she'll destroy our more sensitive equipment otherwise."

Naruto nodded. "Alright, where is she?"

Baki grabbed Naruto's cot. "I'll wheel you to her tent if you're injured."

Naruto hopped out of the bed. "Nah, it's fine, I hate being bedridden anyway."

He made a shadow clone and pointed toward Mitsuki, it silently nodded in reply and sat down on her cot. The clone grabbed her hand and continued Naruto's story from where the original was interrupted.

The real Naruto looked at Baki and motioned for him to take the lead. They walked back out into the sun, Naruto stumbled a bit and Baki's head snapped over to the blonde.

"You sure you can walk? I can get you a wheelchair or something."

Naruto nodded, he finally began to realize just how tired he was since his adrenaline rush from the past few hours was beginning to wear off. Baki wolf-whistled without using his fingers and pointed to Naruto, after about thirty seconds, a group of medics brought over a wheelchair and eased Naruto into it. The jinchuuriki could immediately feel the pressure in his spine begin to dissipate, as well as the fatigue in his legs.

Naruto let out a long and soft exhale; he leaned back slightly and popped his neck. Baki was wheeling him to an out-of-the-way section of the outpost, though one wouldn't know, judging from the localized sandstorm as well as the countless support staff sprinting in and out of the tent.

Baki sped up and eventually was running with Naruto in the chair, Naruto was starting to become nervous as he approached the wall of airborne sand. The blonde was starting to have difficulty hearing Baki's voice, as they closed in on the tent, the wind was beginning to howl.

"It's even worse than when she was brought in! I know you're tired, but I hear she won't even let anyone touch her, not even for a basic checkup!"

Baki continued after a short pause. "I just need you to keep her occupied for a bit, calm her down, nothing too difficult!"

Naruto's teeth started to chatter, the last time he Gaara was even close to being this worked up, she was beating Naruto within an inch of his life, so he was within his rights to be worried.

Naruto took a deep breath and Baki wheeled him through the tent's opening. There were grains of sand as well as tiny pebbles floating at various heights throughout the tent. The medics were cowering in the corner of the tent, Gaara was curled up on a cot, staring at them intently. She didn't blink once as Baki silently wheeled Naruto closer to Gaara, her focus was still on the medical staff, who dared not move out of fear.

"Gaara-chan?"

Naruto's grip tightened around his Blood IV and he slowly approached the red-headded jinchuuriki. Naruto's hand slowly moved toward her, some sand flew up and grabbed Naruto's wrist, her head slowly turned toward the blonde ninja.

"They keep trying to examine me. I'm fine... They refuse to listen no matter how many times I tell them."

Naruto sighed and sat down next to Gaara and the sand slowly loosened its grip on Naruto's wrist, allowing him to sit closer. Naruto grabbed her shoulder, and all of the sand in the room instantly fell to the floor.

Naruto pointed to a few oozing wounds on Gaara's arms and shins.

"You know Gaara-chan, they won't leave you alone until they can look at your wounds…Those'll start to fester if you don't take care of them…"

Gaara frowned and looked down at the blood and pus on her arms and legs, she then stared down into the sheets in silence.

Naruto's eyes widened slightly, he whispered in her ear. "…You still hate being touched by people you don't know."

Naruto felt her twitch slightly and she nodded a tiny bit. The redhead leaned into Naruto and he hugged her, Naruto sighed when he looked at a wound on Gaara's arm. He didn't like it, but he'd have to coerce her into getting treated.

"Gaara-chan, I'm gonna have to go back to Konoha now… unless you decide to let the medical team treat your injuries."

Naruto looked down and gauged her reaction; the sand in the room began to vibrate, but eventually, it slowed back to stillness.

Gaara pouted, but finally agreed to allow the medical staff within three feet of her; she gave Naruto a puppy-dog stare with those big green eyes of hers, Naruto smiled at her in reply.

Naruto looked at one of the medics. "Hey, is it okay if I hold her hand while you patch her up?"

The medic looked at Naruto wearily, but the death-glare on the Kazekage's face was enough to make the kunoichi-medic nod in approval, if only to avoid getting smashed in the face by a wall of sand.

Naruto could feel Gaara's vice-grip on his hand tighten and loosen as the medic went over her wounds and cuts with disinfectant and gauze. It had only taken about ten minutes, but Gaara was patched up, her wounds sealed. She looked at Naruto and gave him a rather apprehensive sort of hug-squeeze. As usual, Gaara's attempts at affection were stiff and awkward, but they had their own sort of charm to them.

She looked like she was about to say something to Naruto, but she cut herself off, she turned and narrowed her eyes at the medical staff, who stared back anxiously. With a flicker of her eyebrow, the sand in the room slid beneath the feet of medical staff and swiftly slid them out of the tent, Baki of course had walked out several minutes ago, likely after he realized that the Kazekage would want to be alone with Naruto for a while.

"I knew you'd save me."

Naruto squeezed her tighter. "I'm just glad you're okay, Gaara-chan… I don't know what I would have done if I'd lost you."

She rested her head on Naruto's chest. "I… I want you to stay in Sunagakure, if only for a day."

Naruto smiled at his fellow container. "Of course I'll stay here for a little bit! … But you'll need to rest, you've still lost a lot of blood, it'll be easier for Shukaku to heal your body while you sleep."

Gaara nodded. "Sleep… Please, stay here with me… I… I don't want to be alone again."

Naruto was taken aback by Gaara's statement, he carried her over to an adjacent cot with fewer bloodstains on it, he gently placed her down and gave her a bright and reassuring smile.

"Close your eyes Gaara-chan. I'll be right here next to you. You can even hold my hand if you want."

Her face went a bit pink, and of course, her lips turned upward a little. She responded, grabbing Naruto's hand, her green puppy-dog eyes lit up a noticeable amount.

"Naruto… I want you to know… You're very important to me… I thought I would die there. I'm the Kazekage, but as I sat there bleeding out in that cave, I didn't think about Sunagakure or it's people a single time… All my thoughts were occupied with whether or not I'd get to see you again."

Naruto smiled at her and gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. "I'm glad we both got our wishes."

Gaara had a blank expression, but tears began to roll down her face, she stared at the far wall of the tent as her voice fluctuated in its tone. "I had a dream that night, after the Akatsuki captured me… I died in that cave after they extracted my Shukaku, I had to sit through my own funeral. My family's mourning, the people I've sworn myself to protect, none of it was as painful as watching your reaction to my demise. No matter how loud I screamed, no matter how much I tried, you couldn't see or hear my soul call out to you. You were hurting, and I couldn't do anything about it, I just had to sit there and watch you suffer… I suppose it hurt so much because I was reminded of what my life felt like before I met you, I was nothing, a machine of war with no purpose outside of death and destruction. I… I…"

Gaara trailed off as Naruto touched her forehead to his own, she saw pain as well as a myriad of other mixed emotions in his eyes. Then their noses touched, Naruto could feel something pulling him toward the Kazekage, their shared experiences with unbearable lonliness, their battle of ideology during the Chuunin Exams Attack, everything they'd been through up until this point felt like it was culminating in this very moment… There was a short pause, then, their lips touched, Naruto had kissed her, then and there.

She had no idea how to respond to this form of affection, the red-head's skin began to match her hair as their lips broke contact.

"… It's okay Gaara-chan, I'm here now, and that's all that matters."

Naruto had a shadow clone bring him his wheelchair; he plopped down in it, and locked the wheels.

Gaara, having had no prior experience with this sort of thing, just nodded with a dumb-looking expression. She leaned back, and stared at the ceiling for several minutes, at least until the silence became awkward, she looked at Naruto, who was looking at her with that same weary, yet loving, expression. Gaara's mouth upturned once more before she shut her eyes and drifted off to sleep.

Naruto chose to remain at his seat next to her bedside, Gaara would probably wake up and throw a temper tantrum if he left, so he figured that it'd be a good time for him to catch some shut-eye as well, but not before issuing one final thought as he looked at the bracelet Gaara had given him.

"_We fight through our pain, our souls break the chains... Maybe you're on to something Gaara-chan."_

* * *

_10:30pm, Sunagakure; The Kazekage's Tower_

Sakura, in being the physically strongest person within a reasonable distance, was forced to carry repair equipment up several lights of stairs… well, _forced _is a strong word. She'd only decided to it because the damage from the Sand Sibling's battle with Deidara and Sasori had caused the building's power to go out, so the elevator was out of question. Sakura figured repairs would go faster if she just carried the multitude of heavy boxes up the stairwell all at once.

The minor repairs had already been completed, but the gigantic hole in the roof would likely take a couple of hours for the repair team to get around to. Sakura had reached the top floor with time to spare before the rest of the crew got there, so she carried the boxes around the circular hallway to the hole.

The pinkette deftly tossed the stack of crates in her left hand into the air and gently caught them one by one, placing them in a line along the hole in the roof and wall. Sakura sat on the box of sledgehammers and looked out over Sunagakure, the village was actually quite beautiful at night, it happened to have been a full moon as well. After a few seconds of staring at the moonlit rooftops, Sakura sensed a strange presence behind her.

"You're Sakura Haruno, yes?"

Sakura turned to see an elderly woman with a peculiar smirk on her face, the elderly woman walked over to the nearest box next to Sakura and sat down on it.

Sakura smiled a bit. "Yes, that's me. Might I know your name miss?"

"Chiyo, Lady Chiyo…"

Sakura scratched her head in response. "Lady Chiyo, how exactly do you know who I am? I can't be all that famous."

"You're Tsunade's newest apprentice… that slug girl was always trying to outdo me back in the day. About a year ago, we crossed paths by chance, and all she did was brag about you. She described you to me, you're impossible to miss!"

Sakura grinned and mentally patted herself on the back, seeing as Tsunade wasn't much for praising anyone besides Naruto.

"The hair's a dead giveaway isn't it?"

Chiyo began to laugh at Sakura. "Ha! I'm near blind as a bat, on top of that it's dark up here, I can't see your hair! … But I could pick out your rear-end from a mile away, I bet you've got all sorts of people rubber-necking when you walk down the street! Hahaha! You've got those premium quality child-birthing hips, your babies'll be big and healthy!"

Sakura's brow twitched a bit and she turned her attention to the city below… or she at least tried to.

Chiyo was a troll at heart, so she of course couldn't resist escalating the already awkward conversation.

"Don't get all huffy about it! … I'm sure that Naruto boy can't keep his eyes off of you!"

Sakura's face went full on tomato as her head snapped to the elderly woman. "H-how much did Tsunade-sensei te-"

Chiyo laughed, cutting Sakura off. "Too much… You know, you're making a huge mistake, sitting on this I mean."

Sakura sighed. "You're the second person to tell me that today… I've done my thinking already, and I can't figure this out. I just need more time."

"But how much time do you have really?"

Sakura was about to reply, but she saw a familiar looking figure approaching from the sky.

Chiyo raised her eyebrow and yelled out of the hole in the wall. "Temari-chan? Is that you?"

The girl floated in through the gigantic hole in the wall/roof and skidded on her feet a bit before collapsing her fan.

Temari smirked. "How've ya been you old hag!"

Chiyo sighed. "Still lacking in the manners department I see."

Temari cracked her back and turned to Sakura, who cut her off before she could speak.

"Tsunade-sensei let you out of the hospital so soon? That doesn't seem like her."

"Well… I snuck out as soon as I was feeling better. I heard the good news though, where's Gaara-chan?"

Sakura kicked back on her crate of sledgehammers. "She's downstairs with Naruto-kun."

Sakura grumbled. "She hasn't let go of him since the sun went down, the medical staff made me pry her off of him so they could change her bandages... _Do you know how long that took me? _I thought Naruto was an odd case, but apparently super-strength is a shared trait..." Sakura decided to be vague, seeing as she was unsure of how much Chiyo knew about Naruto's... condition.

Temari started laughing at Sakura. "Yeah, that sounds just like Gaara-chan. I'll go down and see'er now… later you two."

* * *

Naruto was awkwardly waiting in the lobby, since apparently Gaara needed a sponge bath as well as a new set of bandages and clothing. She'd been gone for nearly twenty minutes, though Naruto would admit his arm needed a break, there were a few bruises on it from when Sakura had to come in and pry Gaara off of him so she could be treated.

Naruto stared at the candle on the large coffee table, it was the only source of light in the room besides the moon. Suddenly Kakashi sauntered past Naruto, he didn't even look at his student as he headed into the basement, Naruto could see electricity arcing off of his hands as he descended the stairs… A few seconds afterward, several Suna ninja came bolting into the lobby.

"Hey blondie! Did you see where that Copycat Ninja guy went?"

Naruto shrugged and stared back at the group of ninja, suddenly, the lights inside the tower came back on and a few seconds later, Kakashi walked out of the basement.

Naruto stared at his teacher, who immediately pulled out his porn and sat in one of the arm chairs across from Naruto, who was starting to snicker.

"Never get between Kakashi-sensei and his Icha-Icha!"

The Suna ninja just sighed and went up the stairs, likely to start repairing the hole in the roof.

Naruto stared at his teacher for a few seconds, and eventually the silver-haired shinobi felt Naruto's eyes drilling into his forehead. He looked at Naruto and raised an eyebrow, signaling for his student to speak.

"Kakashi-sensei, what do I do about Sakura-chan?"

"Give her time. She really loves you, you know that right?"

Naruto stared at the still-lit candle on the coffee table. "Sometimes I'm not sure about that… Things like, what she wants from me? I've gotten more reciprocation out of _**Gaara-chan**_ of all people, and honestly I don't know what the hell I should do about our promise anymore… It seems a bit pointless right now."

Kakashi started to chuckle. "Naruto, what was the first thing I told Team 7 about being shinobi?"

"… Work together?"

"Nah, earlier."

Naruto thought for a few seconds and his eyes lit up with realization. "…_ Look underneath the underneath."_

"Right, be careful about taking things at face value, especially when your dealing with women, they don't function like you and I do… They're usually a lot… subtler. Emotionally, Sakura's in an extremely weird place right now, so if the back-and-forth begins to bug you, try to see things from her point of view, it might help you stay patient… You're doing this for her, aren't you?"

Naruto pouted. "Yeah! Of course I am 'ttebayo!"

"Then let her figure it out. You've upheld your end of the bargain up until this point, you got her a chance to see Sasuke again, it's not in your hands anymore."

Naruto got a strange look on his face. "You know, the fox told me to do the same thing."

Kakashi raised an eyebrow. "Speaking of which, your features still haven't reverted back to normal. Are you still in control?"

Naruto nodded. "Yeah, I'm gonna have Ero-Sannin take a look at my seal as soon as we get back. Right now, I'm avoiding using any sort of demonic chakra, since I don't know what's happening right now."

Kakashi nodded. "Hn. Alright then. I'm turning in for the night, we've got a long day tomorrow, I hear that the Sunagakure council has a request for us, so we'll probably be here a bit longer."

Naruto stretched backward and nodded. "I'll see ya tomorrow then! G'night!"

With that Kakashi went up the stairs to find a guest room to sleep in.

A few seconds passed before another blonde descended those same stairs, she locked eyes with Naruto and smirked.

"You're not one to disappoint are you?"

Naruto nodded and gave her a thumbs-up. "It's what I do!"

Temari strolled over to the couch Naruto was sitting on and plopped down next to him. There was a short pause, completely silent.

Then, Temari abruptly grabbed Naruto by the face and gave him a tounguey kiss. Naruto was reeling from the suddenness of Temari's display of affection.

"Thanks for saving Gaara-chan. You really don't understand how much this means to me."

Naruto wasn't listening of course, he was a bit pink in the face as he stared at Temari.

Naruto smiled nervously. "I'm sorry, but I'm in a bit of a bind as far as dating goes… Let's just say I'm emotionally unavailable at the moment."

Temari pinched Naruto on the cheek. "You're a good kisser… and yes, I know that you're a bit tied up as far as girls go... the Hokage filled me in. I just wanted to thank you personally for everything you've done for my sister, you don't understand what it was like living under the same roof when she'd kill at the drop of a hat. Seeing her now, it's so strange; yet, it's just what I've wanted for her all along. Whether you choose her or not, she's grown into an incredible human being, just her falling for you has made her a better person. _I swear, if you were more my type_… well, that and the fact that Gaara-chan would probably bury me alive if I tried to scoop you from her. You're more trouble than your worth."

'_**FUCK!' **_Naruto jumped slightly at the fox's sudden interjection of discontent.

Naruto sighed with relief. "That's cool with me… So what's your type then?"

Temari chuckled to herself and smirked, she crossed her legs and leaned on the armrest. "You're a bit to bubbly for me… Just watch, afterward, I'll give you one guess."

Just then, Shikamaru barged into the tower lobby, he smirked as soon as he saw Naruto and Temari chatting on the couch.

"_Mataku,_ Naruto, another one? Leave some for the rest of us."

Temari smirked at Shikamaru. "Hey Mr. Sunshine. You come to screw up my little moment with Naruto?"

Shikamaru rolled his eyes and grabbed some jelly candies from a bowl on one of the tables.

The Nara boy smirked. "Heh, you have fun with that blondie… I thought fighting over "_cute guy_s" wasn't your style."

Temari grabbed Naruto and jammed his face into her cleavage, mocking Shikamaru in an overly cutesy tone of voice.

"Oh, he's _**unbelievably**_ cute. I'd totally date him if Gaara-chan wasn't opposed to sand-blasting me into a skeleton."

Immediately after she finished speaking, she let go of his head.

Shikamaru sat down on one of the armchairs and started eating the jelly candies one by one. There was an almost insulting level of disinterest in his tone of voice.

"…Good for you Temari."

Temari smirked at Shikamaru. "Don't get all butt-hurt Shikamaru, Naruto's not really my type anyway."

Shikamaru rolled his eyes and sliced a fly in half with one of his kunai. "Then what _**is**_ your type?"

Temari started to chuckle as she stood up, she walked over and pulled Shikamaru up by the wrist and sauntered up the stairs.

"It's a secret. I can only tell you if no one else is listening."

The resident genius narrowed his eyes in suspicion. "What're you on about? Why's it matter if Naruto hears?"

"Just come with me so I can _**show**_ you."

"Show me what? You always drag me around with you and run me ragged whenever we hang out, what is it?"

Temari crossed her arms and glowered at the Nara heir. "Shikamaru, you're the stupidest genius I've ever met…"

With that, she went up the stairs, the swing in her hips was a bit exaggerated, likely to spite Shikamaru.

Naruto scratched his head and stared at Shikamaru, who looked back at him in bewilderment.

Naruto, having had a crash course in the language of the human female, decided to help his buddy out after he made his deduction.

"Hey uh Shikamaru… Don't you wanna see her naked?"

Shikamaru stared at Naruto for a few seconds before his eyes widened, he immediately bolted up the stairs while Naruto sat there on the couch, just as confused as ever. He honestly didn't know what Temari meant just then, but it was the fact that his past experiences up to this point would have him believe Temari was likely refering something sexual in nature.

Naruto looked at a clock on the wall, it was a few minutes past 10, so he'd figured he'd go find one of the guest rooms to use, apparently, tomorrow would be an important day for him… as well as tonight.

* * *

Naruto was having a rather mundane dream about a D-Rank mission pulling weeds with Team 7. Naruto and Sasuke were about to go at it using shovels as makeshift weapons when the Kyuubi appeared towering above them. He singled Naruto out, much like he'd done previously when he needed Naruto to wake up.

"_**Kit, we've another visitor." **_The fox turned its head to the sky and appeared to be yelling at someone.

"_**Is that all you've got for me, you fat fuck?"**_

Naruto dropped his shovel and sighed before the Kyuubi crushed him beneath his paw, the blonde's eyes shot open, the room was dark, but his eyes were already adjusted. Naruto smiled when he saw Gaara sleeping next to him, with her head on his mattress, she was sitting in a chair made out of sand, and she'd even brought her IV drip with her.

Naruto poked Gaara in the head a few times, she slowly awoke and stared at him in silence, even as dark as it was, Naruto could tell she was blushing like a strawberry.

"Hey Gaara-chan. You have a bad dream?"

She shook her head and crawled onto the bed and sat on her knees, Naruto sat up and crossed his legs, facing her.

There was a long silence as the Kazekage stared into Naruto's eyes, who could tell that something strange was afoot. The look in her eyes was something Naruto had never seen from her before.

"I… I want you to touch me."

Naruto stared back with an innocent smile and a genuinely curious expression. "Oh. Like how?"

She grabbed Naruto's hand by the wrist and put it on the side of her face. It was here that Naruto realized that his fellow jinchuuriki was only wearing a sheer nightdress, leaving almost nothing to imagination.

'_**Kit… Split her in half.'**_

Naruto's eyes nearly popped out of his head in amazement, before he'd had time to process what was happeneing, the Kazekage had pulled him on top of her. The strange look in her eyes reminded Naruto of his moment with Anko in the fores. The boy knew that the Kazekage still had a ways to go in terms of her psychological health, he brushed some of her hair out of her eyes and kissed her on the cheek.

"Gaara-chan, a-are you sure you want to-"

She cut Naruto off when she pulled him back on top of her.

"_Naruto... Touch me..."_

_FIN_

* * *

**AN: I'm working on the uncut version of the final scene, which will go up on the AdultFanFiction Lost Chapters version of Orange Flash. As far as votes go Hokage or Bust has pulled ahead again, but only by a small amount. Since it's in the lead, the flashback you saw with Naruto and Sakura is probably how I'm going to portray Hokage or Bust Naruto in Prologue Orange. Like in the description, he's essentially the same character we all know and love, he's just a bit more driven, and his love for Sakura will be developed over time as opposed to just being a thing. Don't forget to vote, and also, the polls will close upon completion of the Suna arc, which should be wrapped up within a chapter or two.**

**29 Votes**

"_**Hokage or Bust" Naruto:**_ This potential portrayal will make Naruto more of the _"Pampered Orphan" _variety, a la Young Bruce Wayne. In my canon, Kakashi, Jiraiya, and the 3rd Hokage are much bigger parts of Naruto's early life, and in this portrayal _specifically_; they're actively grooming him to be the Hokage one day. He'll still be a hyperactive prankster, but he'll also be a bit more goal oriented, even going so far as to blow off a _mildly_ interested Sakura to train or learn about the previous Kage. His relationship with Sakura will grow more complex in order to bring him in line with his Orange Flash incarnation; the transition wouldn't make sense otherwise because Orange Flash Naruto is in love with Sakura. His doomed relationship with Haku will be his primary source of motivation to be the Hokage, because at first, he'll feel like he was forced onto his path and sort of apathetically walk toward it.

**20 Votes**

"_**Strong Idiot" Naruto**_: This Naruto isn't "_stupid_" per se, he just functions on the idea that; **"If it doesn't work, you didn't hit it hard enough."** What's makes him different from Canon!Naruto, is that he actually has the physical abilities to back up his brutish approach to life. Naruto's the strongest genin in the class, tied with Sasuke. Normally, this would have him put on another team for balancing purposes, but he's assigned to Team 7 because his high grades concerning his physical abilities don't average well with his abysmal grades in the more mental intensive categories (i.e. espionage, stealth, strategy, etc.) Hilarity ensues as Kakashi constantly tries and fails to teach Naruto the importance of finesse in shinobi life (i.e. that being a walking hammer doesn't make all of your problems nails). He'll get on Sasuke's nerves from time to time with his uncanny ability to solve everything with force. This version of Naruto will gradually balance out his skill set over the course of the story, this way, he'll be more in line with his older-self in the main story. Haku's death will cause him to reevaluate his approach to shinobi life, this forces him to place more emphasis on using his mind, as he'll feel that he could have saved Haku where he a more well-rounded ninja.

**14 Votes**

"_**Two-Face" Naruto: **_This version of Naruto _**isn't**_ dark, hyper intelligent, or brooding _(leave that shit to Sasuke… or Batman… __**Dark!Naruto is ridiculous. Stop it.**__)_, this version merely has two distinct sides, happy go-lucky, and listless solitude. Kishimoto mentions it, but doesn't elaborate on such an important piece of Naruto as a character. I'll delve into his loneliness a bit more in this incarnation; Team 7 (except Kakashi) will generally hate his guts until they understand how truly damaged Naruto is as a person. For this Naruto, his complex nature is what sows the initial seeds of Sakura's attraction to him. His transition to the Naruto we see in Orange Flash will happen during the training trip as he learns to discard his mask and show the underneath (i.e. a matter of fake smiles vs. real ones).

**12 Votes**

_**Delinquent Naruto: **_ This version is as close as I'll go to _Dark!_Naruto. He's brash, chirpy, confrontational, and **violently** temperamental. The entire class, save for Sasuke and Hinata is scared shitless of him. I believe Naruto has every right to be angry at the world, even in my canon with Kakashi, Jiraiya, and the 3rd Hokage as his surrogate family. While Naruto has been adequately provided for in my canon, his guardians still keep him in the dark, and by extension, at a distance. Because he can't know the truth of his lineage quite yet, and due to the fact that Naruto's guardians all had close relationships with his parents, Naruto has no one to talk to... he's just frustrated. His experience with Haku and Zabuza will mellow him out so that he gradually becomes more in sync with his personality in Orange flash.

_Breath of the Wiz_

_~Signin' Off_


	34. Chapter 34: Arrows and Avarice

AN: Sorry for the long bout of silence, I wanted to have a rapid string of releases leading up to Prologue Orange, so expect to see update notifications go up in rapid succession. I've been doing some re-reading, and I've just realized that in terms of in-story passage of time, it's only been a little over a week since Naruto returned to Konoha (About 9 days at the beginning of this chapter). I'll figure out how to remedy that soon enough… Anyway, This chapter will begin the wrap-up the Suna Arc. Also, I'd like to mention that I've made a few additions/revisions to Sasuke and Sakura's little chat in chapter 32, nothing major, just a bit of extra dialogue here and there. Take a quick look if you feel like it. Also, **there's an uncut version of Naruto's encounter with femGaara in ch.33 on AFF, so go ahead and check that out… if you're into reading that sort of stuff. Search for Orange Flash: The Lost Chapters**

* * *

A good nights sleep was something that Sakura had been accustomed to receiving over the years. Tonight though… Sleep just wasn't something that she was getting.

Sakura had chosen the room next to Naruto's in the hopes that she could talk to him about their promise later that night, but it seems that someone else had a similar idea. Her first guess would be Gaara, the girl always had a sort of obsessive infatuation with him ever since the Chunin Exams… and judging from what Sakura was hearing through the walls, it had likely bubbled over into something else over the past few years.

The walls in question were rather thin, so it wasn't that hard for Sakura to hear what was going on. The creaking of the bedsprings, the moans of ecstasy, a feminine voice saying his name from time to time… At this point, Sakura was unsure if the room was getting hot, or if it was just her.

However, this… heat, it was different, it actually wasn't some sort of base arousal at all (yet)… Sakura was conflicted. The thought of what was going on in the other room placed her in the valley between jealousy and depression. This was supposed to be her chance to truly figure out what Naruto wanted to do about Sasuke, but sadly, she'd have to wait the night out.

Nothing went right in that cave, she had at least expected Sasuke to have a more neutral than hostile reaction, but even that was far too great a luxury for him to afford. With a tiny bit of distance from the interaction, Sakura could say with certainty that she still had feelings for Sasuke… she hated it, but it was true.

Sakura sat there and thought to herself, wondering if Naruto still truly loved her the way he did when they were younger, she was hoping to find some rationalization for still loving Sasuke and not having fallen for Naruto,

Sakura searched her memory of the past 9 days since Naruto's return, and he'd done absolutely nothing to support that hypothesis. Sakura sighed in despair and picked up the alarm clock next to her bed. She squinted through the darkness and could see that it was still far too early in the morning to stay awake for the rest of the day.

Suddenly, she heard Naruto's grunt through the wall and heard another moan, Sakura could hear a more feminine voice clearly enough to understand it.

"_Naruto… Please, do it harder."_

Sakura gasped and her face turned pinker than her hair. She could hear the squeaking of the mattress speed up and the moaning increased in volume as well. The only thing that snapped her out of her horrified trance was the sound of small objects clattering to the floor; she looked down and realized that she had completely pulverized the alarm clock in her hand.

Sakura placed the now useless clock in the trash and scooped up the pieces. The instant she dropped the rest of the clock in the bin, she realized she could hear the sound of flesh smacking against flesh. Her fists balled up so tight that her knuckles cracked and her teeth started to grind together.

Sakura felt like the room was boiling, though, in reality, it was just her. She grabbed a towel and some soap and decided it'd be a good time to go take a freezing-cold shower, courtesy of impure thoughts concerning Naruto… again.

As soon as she exited the room, she was treated to an unexpected sight. Chiyo, Kakashi, Temari, and even Shikamaru were in the hallway wearily staring at the door to Naruto's room. They all turned to Sakura for a split second, but immediately returned to staring at the door. Everyone except Kakashi appeared to be somewhere between annoyed and amused… Kakashi was just amused, he calmly scribbled in a notebook and chuckled to himself intermittently.

Sakura pushed through the crowd and squeezed into the bathroom. She placed her things in order and turned on the water, as she mentally prepared herself for the cold, she listened to the conversation outside the door as it began to pick up once again.

"_Mataku… Who's gonna tell them to shut up?"_

"_Not me."_

"Oh, really? _Temari, she's your sister!"_

"_Well, he's __**your **_teammate… Besides, I'm pretty sure she'd murder whoever ruins this for her?"

"_Children, children… Let them have their fun, I believe we have a few extra rooms hidden away on the upper floors… White Fang, what're you writing?"_

"… _Sentences."_

There was the sound of footsteps, as they got quieter and quieter, Sakura heard one final exchange between Shikamaru and Temari.

_"... So uh... Round two?"_

_"I thought you'd never ask, Mr. Sunshine... Let's go on the roof."_

Sakura's monster grip created some small fissures in the wash basin, she growled and made the shower's water even colder, apparently **everyone** except herwas getting cozy that night. She sighed and took a deep breath before taking part in the most uncomfortable cold shower ever. It had only been about 15 minutes before Sakura began to feel like she was beginning to freeze, so she figured that was a good time to get out and try to get some sleep.

When she opened the door, she saw that everyone except Kakashi had left; he was crouching, with his back propped against the circular hallway's wall.

"Hey, Kakashi-sensei, what're you writing?"

He looked up at her and eye-smiled, Sakura could tell he had ulterior motives but decided to hear him out.

Kakashi told her the truth... well, half of it anyway.

"Jiraiya-sama asked me to thoroughly document the events of this trip with detailed notes, you know, the fox and all. I just figured he'd be amused to hear that Naruto got some while he was away."

Sakura stared down at her quizzically; she paused for a moment when she heard another moan. She flexed her hands in annoyance and returned to her train of thought. She immediately became worried about her teammate.

"I-is this about… Naruto's condition?"

Kakashi's eyes widened in surprise… thought mostly in levity. The man would have laughed out loud if it weren't for the legitimately scared look on Sakura's face.

"Yeah… we'll go with that." Kakashi gave her a warm eye-smile.

Sakura nodded and twiddled her thumbs. "So… I'm assuming you haven't noticed anything out of the ordinary have you?"

Kakashi raised his eyebrow. "Aside from the fact that two Jinchuuriki with almost identical backgrounds and worldviews are having sex behind that door?"

Steam hissed off of Sakura's forehead. "…You know what I mean, Kakashi-sensei."

Kakashi chuckled to himself and maintained his little fib concerning his motivations. "…I haven't seen any red lights coming from underneath the door if that's what you're asking."

Sakura exhaled, genuinely relieved. "Oh, thank…"

The pinkette suddenly snapped out of her anxiety and stared her teacher dead in the eye.

"You're hiding something from me."

Kakashi smirked beneath his mask and then, shrugged, he figured he should tell Sakura what was really going on, it would be pretty funny after all.

"Sakura, what's my favorite book?"

She shuddered. "That smutty Icha Icha series..."

Kakashi started to chuckle again. "Alright, very good. Now, who writes them?"

Sakura crossed her arms and raised her eyebrow, she whispered energetically.

"_Why would I know that?!"_

"Well I'll tell you. Jiraiya-sama writes the series. The most recent editions have been based off of someone you know very well... you get one guess."

Kakashi punctuated his phrase with a small nod to Naruto's door. "But yeah… I'm looking out for demonic chakra too… I guess."

Sakura's toiletries slowly clattered to the floor, this made Kakashi's eye snap to the door to check for movement, but after a few seconds the background moaning continued.

Sakura calmly sat down on the floor and stared at the wall, obviously deep in thought.

'_Naruto-kun is a pornstar.'_

Sakura's inner companion chimed in as well.

'_**Hm… Well, not technically at least… So… how about we go and grab a copy from the nearest book store?'**_

'_Eh?! NO!'_

'_**SHANNAROOOOOOO! We're gonna do it whether you like it or not! And THEN?! We're gonna read it cover to cover, IN ONE FUCKING SITTING!'**_

Sakura's inner monologue was abruptly cut off when she noticed Kakashi waving his hands in front of her face.

"Oi, Sakura-chan. You there? …Why're you smiling like that?"

Sakura's strange expression flipped on a dime as her eyes widened in flustered anxiety.

"I AM NOT!"

The Pinkette immediately slammed her hands over her mouth when she realized that she was screaming, it was here that the moaning coming from Naruto's room had stopped.

She then noticed that there was a slowly advancing current of sand beginning to leak beneath the door. She stared at it in confusion and began to nervously back away from the door. Kakashi had jumped to his feet and fast-walked down the stairs and into the lounge, Sakura instinctively followed her teacher down the stairs. She really didn't want to take her chances finding out what was going on in that room when there was so much sand around for Gaara-chan to disembowel her with.

Kakashi blazed down even more notes intently, from what Sakura could tell, he was muttering something about 'kinky sand', her inner-self put it all together and started feeding her possibilities for erotic uses of sand, especially with the Kazekage's skillset in mind.

The medic-nin stuffed her face into her hands and sat down on the nearest couch. She was a complete mess at this point (… well… relatively speaking, you know, with all things considered), as any calming effect the cold-shower had on her emotional state had been erased in a matter of minutes.

Kakashi completed his detailed scribbling, jotting down the last of his hypothetical uses for erotic sand and earth-jutsu. He then looked at Sakura, who appeared to be having an emotional crisis on the couch, Kakashi sighed when he realized that she was starting to cry a tiny bit.

He sat down on the couch opposite Sakura and whistled to get her attention, she looked up at him and he did a small gesture with his hands, as if permitting her to spill her guts.

Sakura was able to talk in a surprisingly even-tone despite the tears. "I thought I was done crying today, but I guess it just hasn't sunken in yet."

Kakashi raised his eyebrow and thought back to earlier that day and he quickly pieced it all together.

"… So I'm guessing this is about Sasuke. Whenever you're like this, it's always got something to do with him."

Sakura nodded and smiled a tiny bit and tears continued to roll down her face. "It's pathetic really, one makes me cry, feel like I can't do anything right. The other, he makes me smile, he makes me aspire to be something greater than I am…"

Kakashi's eye left Sakura and stared out the window, Sakura could have sworn he had the look of a dead man for a second, but that pang of emptiness on the exposed part of his face, was gone just as quickly as it showed up.

"… You can't control who you fall in love with Sakura. However, you **can** examine whether or not you love someone because of who they are as a person, or if you love them based on your own perceptions and ideas concerning said person."

Sakura wiped her eyes again and fidgeted.

"… He more or less told me the same thing. I continued to nurture feelings based on… well, you said it yourself, Kakashi-sensei, … I'm not even sure I ever knew what his favorite color was, I only thought about how I could be with him as opposed to how I could understand him… now, I'm stuck in a love triangle that's going nowhere fast."

Kakashi nodded in approval and appeared to lose himself in thought. "It seems you've learned a valuable lesson then. Try and do better this time around… _better than we did."_

Kakashi trailed off in his last phrase, obviously lost in thought. Sakura looked at her teacher once more, he had that same dead look in his eye.

"Kakashi-sensei, what do you mean _**'we did'**_? I'm not sure I follow."

Kakashi looked at the clock on the far wall, and back at Sakura. "You're not planning on going to sleep anytime soon, are you?"

Sakura glared at the cyclopean ninja. "Are you serious?"

Kakashi absentmindedly scratched his head. "Oh, right. Naruto, thin walls…"

"Please, let's not discuss that anymore, what exactly were you going to tell me?"

Kakashi kicked back on the sofa and stared at the ceiling.

"Once upon a time, there was a boy who loved a girl, his name was Obito..."

* * *

_Konoha – The Next Morning_

Breakfast was always an interesting affair at the Hyuga compound, especially with regards to the clan head and his children. Neji was always invited of course, he always accepted the invitation out of courtesy, despite the awkward nature of his interactions with Hiashi, who, even after recieving Neji's forgiveness, was still unable to look his nephew directly in the eye.

Hinata's eyes would always dart back and forth between her cousin and her father as she alternated between staring and eating. Hanabi was, as usual, inhaling food at an alarming pace for someone of her notably small stature; she only bothered paying attention to the tense situation when her stack of empty dishes was high enough to obscure her face.

Then, the customary icebreaker came. This was a simple question, usually asked by Hiashi, which would snowball the generally silent family gathering into something halfway resembling a normal meal.

Hiashi finally had something after thinking about it the entire night prior, as well as a little bit that morning.

"Hinata. I know you've been busy with your team lately, so I never got the chance to ask you how your date with Uzumaki Naruto went."

The three of them all got varying expressions on their faces. Hinata smiled and turned a bit pink in the face, she stared down at her food bashfully, Neji exhaled slowly, as if holding back a torrent of frustration, and Hanabi, well, she had that devious smirk on her face.

Now, Hiashi of course, already knew the answer to this question, as he'd debriefed Hanabi the instant she'd returned with Neji and Hinata that night, the youngest at the table knew exactly what her father was trying to do.

Hinata composed herself and smiled a tiny bit. "It… was interesting. When all was said and done, everything turned out wonderfully… even in spite of all the things that didn't quite go as planned."

Hiashi nodded. "I assume he treated you with the respect fitting an heiress of the Hyuga clan?"

Hinata turned pink. "Oh! Yes, of course! He was a perfect gentleman!"

Hiashi raised a hand to placate his daughter. "There's no need to worry, I'm just asking about how your night went."

It was here that Neji began to catch on to his uncle's machinations as well.

Hiashi continued. "Hinata, I'd like to ask you one more thing…"

Hinata stared at her father in anticipation.

Hiashi swallowed some more rice before speaking.

"From what I hear, things were quite a bit more than interesting. What's this about an uprooted tree in Konoha Park? Apparently, I've been charged with the removal of an oak tree from the bottom of the lake."

Hinata's face turned bright red and she silently excused herself from the table.

Hiashi exhaled and returned to eating his breakfast, he'd have to make a stop by the bank later that day so he could pay off the tree and other related damages.

* * *

Sakura woke up late in the morning, she'd finally managed to go to sleep later that night after things had quieted down. It was about an hour or so before noon and Sakura stared out her window, mentally preparing herself for the day ahead.

Putting on her spare change of clothes, she stepped out of her room and walked to the next room over, she knocked on the door, but there was no answer. She nudged the door open, only to find that the bed had been made and the room was empty. Sakura exhaled and continued down the stairs in hopes of finding Naruto, sadly, he wasn't there either, however, Sakura ran into the next best thing.

"Hey, Shikamaru."

The Nara heir stuffed more jelly candies from the lobby into his pockets and turned to Sakura.

"… You alright? You look like you just got back from a funeral."

Sakura shrugged. "_"Alright"_ is subjective here. I wanted to talk to Naruto, but I think your opinion specifically is just as important."

Shikamaru raised his eyebrow with intrigue. "My opinion? What's this about?"

Sakura leaned on the wall and stared at the patterns on the rug as she spoke to her teammate.

"You were there… when Naruto-kun made his promise to me."

Shikamaru's expression switched once more, he unconsciously placed his hands in their trademark "thinking" position while he listened to Sakura talk.

"Alright. Go on then."

"We… We ran into Sasuke inside the cave yesterday. Judging from what he said to me, even if we managed to bring him back, he'd just hate us for it, it wouldn't fix anything at all. I've been thinking, he told me he was doing this because he wanted to see me happy again. At this point, I'm sure I still want Team 7 to be whole again, but Naruto… I want him to stop all this, before it kills him."

Shikamaru looked at Sakura for a few seconds before he replied. "You can't have it both ways, especially now. You know how Naruto is, I think you dug yourself into a deep hole, both you and I know that he's not gonna stop until you can prove to him, beyond a doubt that..."

Sakura's eyes locked with Shikamaru's. "What are you suggesting? You trailed off."

Shikamaru stared back at her with a slightly annoyed expression. "You know _**exactly**_ what I mean. I got my own thoughts on this bullshit promise of yours, and I don't like it one bit, Naruto's my friend, but at the end of the day, this is between the two of you. How you go about handling this little circus will decide my opinion on all of it, that's really all I have for you."

Sakura took a defensive posture and fired back.

"_I made a mistake_ Shikamaru, a decision that I immediately regretted after the fact. I'm trying to fix this, so instead of getting angry, maybe you could advise me a place to start. What's done is done, all that matters now is finding a way to undo this mess."

Shikamaru exhaled. "Yeah, sorry about that. It just pissed me off at the time… that you'd do that to him, knowing how he felt about you… So, you wanna fix this? Talk with him, figure out **EXACTLY **what he wants, fine print and all."

Sakura nodded. "I know, that was the idea from the outset… However, I was hoping for something that I could use later down the road, seeing as I'm going to go find Naruto as soon as we're finished here."

Shikamaru nodded and thought for a second. "Hm. Have you ever tried… just letting go?"

Sakura groaned and walked out of the room. "Not what I was hoping for... but in this case, maybe that really is the only way out of this mess."

Shikamaru smirked and decided to go figure out what Temari was doing.

* * *

In comparison to yesterday, Mitsuki could say with certainty that she was feeling significantly more coordinated since her concussion. She stared at Kakashi intently while he sifted through the menu, the diner they had found was quaint, but in a charming way.

Finally, after a long silence Kakashi finally spoke up. "So uh, yeah... there's a reason I dragged you out here."

Mitsuki raised her eyebrow and popped another aspirin, the green glow emanating from her eyes made Kakashi feel a bit nervous, she'd known him long enough to where she knew that he had bad news for her.

"I just got a message from the Hokage... You're mother's moving back to Konoha and..."

Mitsuki sipped her tea and gave Kakashi a blank stare. "... Okay. I thought this was something bad, Kakashi-senpai."

"Ah boy... just read this."

Kakashi rubbed the back of his head and handed the message to Mitsuki. She opened it up and skimmed through the letter.

_"Mitsuki-chan, I've got some news for you, whether it's good or bad is... not really something I'm qualified to gauge. So, as you probably foresaw, Yumi has returned to Konoha, however, last night, one of my agents intercepted a suspicious courier within our borders, this courier in question, was carrying the attached note. I'll give you the short version, you can read your brother's letter afterward. - Yes, you read that correctly, Kouta will be stopping through Konoha in just a few days. Under normal circumstances, this wouldn't be much of a problem, but seeing as your mother will be within a 5 mile radius of him within the next week, I implore you to make an attempt to minimize any collateral damage caused by your impending family reunion. Good luck, and get well soon, you're gonna need the rest._

_~ Sincerely, Tsunade"_

The instant Mitsuki had finished reading the letter from Tsunade, a waitress came up to the table.

"Hi! I'll be your waitress for the day, my name's Rika. What would you like to eat?"

"... Sake... leave the bottle."

"No, you have a concussion, you'll be having water. Rika, the Sake's for me."

The waitress stared at the two ninja apprehensively. "I'll be back to take your order uhh... later."

Kakashi put his menu down. "I'll need to start watching my back, especially since your mom's back in town. You know, when I was a genin, she pinned me to a tree by the crotch of my pants after I was rude to her this one time."

Mitsuki smiled a bit. "With an arrow or a kunai? ... Either way, that sounds about right. You know, that's how she'd punish me and Kouta when we got out of hand, she'd leave us stuck to something until dinner time and come get us just as the sun was setting... Heh, good times."

Kakashi stared at his former subordinate in confusion, her wistful nostalgia was disturbing to say the least, especially judging from his previous encounters with the woman in question.

"So, how's your mom doing exactly?"

Mitsuki shrugged. "She says she's been "whipping town back into shape", whatever that means. It's been five years since she's seen Kouta though, so however good she's feeling will change, very soon apparently."

Kakashi smirked beneath his mask. "So I take it she's got a lot of arrows saved up for your brother then?"

Mitsuki nodded. "While she hasn't told me what she plans on doing, I know for a fact, she's gonna rip him a new one the next time she sees him."

Kakashi eye-smiled. "Well then, you'll have to give me all the details when it happens. I've heard stories, but I've never seen her fight."

Mitsuki smirked. "Don't get _too _excited. I don't think she's _**that **_mad."

* * *

Hanabi, after another hour of tinkering with the materials that Ino had given her, had finally managed to complete her contraption. Upon its completion, it appeared to be a bow of some sort, the broom handle had been carefully re-worked into a curved shape, with the spool of ninja-wire hanging on the very tip of the contraption. The bricks attached to the bottom both appeared to serve as a counter-weight to offset the heavy spool of ninja wire, and also, they allowed the bow to stand upright if put down.

Lastly, the metal rings attached were each specially modified to serve a special purpose, one appeared to be a special crosshair sight that had special marks for distance, while the remaining rings sat at the very center of the curved wood, had a small opening that allowed for thin objects to be placed within it.

Hanabi had created a man-portable zip line bow, the applications for it were endless, it didn't have to be carried within a seal, its installment only required one person, and it could be moved and reused after it served its purpose. Of course, with its creator being Hanabi Hyuga… the ingenious device would likely be used for much more… mundane endeavors.

The young genius placed the bow on her shoulder and slipped out of the Hyuga Compound, being extra careful to avoid Neji and Hiashi, as they would either insist on accompanying her, or otherwise force her to take a bodyguard detail with her.

Hanabi zipped along the rooftops and made her way to the training grounds, now that the first part of her plan had been complete, she needed to get some practice in with her new bow. The young girl knew the work ahead would be difficult, especially since she'd never even set her hands on a bow before, but little did she know, she'd make an unlikely acquaintance on the training grounds that day.

When the young Hyuga arrived at the grounds, she immediately realized that she wasn't alone, she looked to the large lake, and at the very center of her field of vision she cast her eyes upon a truly captivating sight.

There was a woman going through some very acrobatic Kata for a form of taijutsu that Hanabi had never seen before. What was interesting about these particular Kata was the face that she appeared to have placed several small training logs in a straight line, each about 2 feet apart.

Despite her pirouettes and acrobatic flips, she was able to gracefully move back and forth along the line of tiny logs without causing any of them fall over. Hanabi could see that the woman's footwork was impeccable, so she sat in her hiding spot and continued to analyze her feet, as well as the manner in which she controlled her center of gravity.

The woman in question had a mature sort of beauty, one that would mark her to be somewhere in her late forties. Hanabi could see that she had wavy black hair with several grey streaks in it, and her skin was a near flawless shade of bronzy tan, and judging from her notable lack of tan-lines, the distinct color was likely her natural complexion. Even though Hanabi was a good distance away, she could tell that this lady was also notably tall for a woman, Hanabi's estimate would put the lady at around 6 feet, possibly taller.

Hanabi tried to glean as much as she could, but eventually realized that she'd have to get a closer look if she wanted to actually learn anything from this strange martial art form that she was witnessing.

Hanabi activated her Byakugan and focused her eyes in on the mystery woman, she of course saw the woman's chakra circulation system, and her field of vision was flooded with that distinct shade of blue, however, there was also another color present, one that Hanabi wasn't used to seeing while her eyes were activated.

Green. Hanabi shook her head and blinked, she was still seeing it. This green 'chakra' appeared to emanate from the woman's eyeballs, while the blue chakra surrounding it had the appearance of a soft fire, the green specs where the lady's eyes would be appeared as if they were two stars floating in a sea of chakra.

Hanabi was so confused by this strange occurrence that she failed to realize that the green orbs appeared to point directly at her for a split second in the middle of one of the woman's graceful summersaults.

After a few more seconds, Hanabi figured she had gleaned all that she could from her observations, so she shifted her weight and started for another nearby training ground. However, her movement was halted when an arrow stuck itself into the tree, millimeters in front of Hanabi's nose. An instant later, Hanabi heard a voice come from the branches above her.

"Hm, not Kouta... my apologies, young Hyuga... You look familiar, might I ask the name of your father?"

* * *

**AN: We'll get more into Hanabi's contraption next time, and also, it's about time Mitsuki's family started getting involved in this fiasco... We're almost there! I'll be closing the poll upon the release of chapter 35, and chapter 36 will drop at the same time as Prologue Orange. Of course, Hokage or Bust is still in the lead by a decent margin, but interestingly enough, "Two-Face Naruto" is starting to catch up to "Strong Idiot". Keep voting everyone! You can find the poll in the top of my profile page, again, it'll close when chapter 35 drops, which will be within the next week.**

_~Breath of the Wiz_

_Signin' Off..._

* * *

**36 Votes**

"_**Hokage or Bust" Naruto:**_ This potential portrayal will make Naruto more of the _"Pampered Orphan" _variety, a la Young Bruce Wayne. In my canon, Kakashi, Jiraiya, and the 3rd Hokage are much bigger parts of Naruto's early life, and in this portrayal _specifically_; they're actively grooming him to be the Hokage one day. He'll still be a hyperactive prankster, but he'll also be a bit more goal oriented, even going so far as to blow off a _mildly_ interested Sakura to train or learn about the previous Kage. His relationship with Sakura will grow more complex in order to bring him in line with his Orange Flash incarnation; the transition wouldn't make sense otherwise because Orange Flash Naruto is in love with Sakura. His doomed relationship with Haku will be his primary source of motivation to be the Hokage, because at first, he'll feel like he was forced onto his path and sort of apathetically walk toward it.

**25 Votes**

"_**Strong Idiot" Naruto**_: This Naruto isn't "_stupid_" per se, he just functions on the idea that; **"If it doesn't work, you didn't hit it hard enough."** What's makes him different from Canon!Naruto, is that he actually has the physical abilities to back up his brutish approach to life. Naruto's the strongest genin in the class, tied with Sasuke. Normally, this would have him put on another team for balancing purposes, but he's assigned to Team 7 because his high grades concerning his physical abilities don't average well with his abysmal grades in the more mental intensive categories (i.e. espionage, stealth, strategy, etc.) Hilarity ensues as Kakashi constantly tries and fails to teach Naruto the importance of finesse in shinobi life (i.e. that being a walking hammer doesn't make all of your problems nails). He'll get on Sasuke's nerves from time to time with his uncanny ability to solve everything with force. This version of Naruto will gradually balance out his skill set over the course of the story, this way, he'll be more in line with his older-self in the main story. Haku's death will cause him to reevaluate his approach to shinobi life, this forces him to place more emphasis on using his mind, as he'll feel that he could have saved Haku where he a more well-rounded ninja.

**21 Votes**

"_**Two-Face" Naruto: **_This version of Naruto _**isn't**_ dark, hyper intelligent, or brooding _(leave that shit to Sasuke… or Batman… __**Dark!Naruto is ridiculous. Stop it.**__)_, this version merely has two distinct sides, happy go-lucky, and listless solitude. Kishimoto mentions it, but doesn't elaborate on such an important piece of Naruto as a character. I'll delve into his loneliness a bit more in this incarnation; Team 7 (except Kakashi) will generally hate his guts until they understand how truly damaged Naruto is as a person. For this Naruto, his complex nature is what sows the initial seeds of Sakura's attraction to him. His transition to the Naruto we see in Orange Flash will happen during the training trip as he learns to discard his mask and show the underneath (i.e. a matter of fake smiles vs. real ones).

**15 Votes**

_**Delinquent Naruto: **_ This version is as close as I'll go to _Dark!_Naruto. He's brash, chirpy, confrontational, and **violently** temperamental. The entire class, save for Sasuke and Hinata is scared shitless of him. I believe Naruto has every right to be angry at the world, even in my canon with Kakashi, Jiraiya, and the 3rd Hokage as his surrogate family. While Naruto has been adequately provided for in my canon, his guardians still keep him in the dark, and by extension, at a distance. Because he can't know the truth of his lineage quite yet, and due to the fact that Naruto's guardians all had close relationships with his parents, Naruto has no one to talk to... he's just frustrated. His experience with Haku and Zabuza will mellow him out so that he gradually becomes more in sync with his personality in Orange flash.


	35. Chapter 35: Turning Point

AN: Totally sorry about the long ass wait. My computer broke, so I had to get that taken care of, and midterms are coming up so I was scrambling to write this one. I even caught a huge case of writers block, but I was able to power through it and get some fun material down. As previously stated, chapter 36 and Prologue Orange will drop at the same time, though I can't realistically put a timetable on that for any of you. Anyway, enjoy!

* * *

"Straighten your back, your posture is throwing off your aim."

"Yes ma'am."

Hanabi leveled out her Zip-line Bow and fired it at another target; she was off center by about six inches. Hanabi prepared another arrow and pulled back the draw string.

She was about to fire when Yumi's voice pierced the silence.

"Hold that pose."

The older woman walked closer and used her hands to adjust Hanabi's posture and make other small fixes to the flaws in Hanbi's form.

"Now then, I want you to hold a shallower breath this time. You inhale far too much, probably twice as much as you need to."

Hanabi nodded and followed Yumi's advice to the letter. She let loose another arrow, again, it was off target, however, this time, it only strayed about 4 inches to the right.

Yumi narrowed her eyes with intrigue. "Hanabi, let me see that bow."

Hanabi nodded and handed her contraption up to the tall woman, Yumi took it and pulled back the drawstring a few times.

She raised her eyebrow and looked down at Hanabi before speaking. "Hanabi, how strong are you?"

Hanabi was slightly confused by Yumi's question. "In what regard Tachibana-sensei?"

"Physically."

Hanabi thought for a moment and was unable to come up with a concrete answer for Yumi, who seemed genuinely surprised as she continued to fiddle with the drawstring.

"I find myself unable to recall any sort of concrete values in relation to my physical strength. Why do you ask, Tachibana-sensei?"

Yumi smirked as she stared at Hanabi's bow. "The draw strength may be off, my first guess is that it's been set too low."

Hanabi nodded and handed Yumi a Kunai. "I have incorporated a mechanism on the handle that allows me to adjust the draw weight. If you slot this kunai in the notched bolt and twist it to the right, you may increase the tension."

Yumi took the Kunai and was about to tighten the bolt, but she stopped herself and took a knee next to Hanabi.

"Hanabi, grab my upper arm and pull my hand, as if you were preparing to fire your bow at a full draw. Pull as hard as you can."

Hanabi did as she was told, she set her feet and took a breath, then, she pulled on Yumi's arm as hard as she could.

Yumi's eyes widened slightly in surprise after Hanabi let go of her hand, the older woman then adjusted the draw weight on Hanabi's bow accordingly.

"I want you to try firing at the target again, do everything we've gone over up until now, just don't forget to account for the extra draw weight."

Hanabi took her Zip-line Bow back and prepared to fire another shot, she took her breath, narrowed her eyes, and yanked the arrow into the drawstring. Hanabi had to put a significant amount of effort into fully drawing the bow, but the extra resistance steadied her aim.

Hanabi let the arrow loose and it screamed toward the target. Bullseye.

Yumi smiled. "Good. If you do that again, we'll eat lunch, I've enough food for the both of us."

Hanabi's stomach growled and she nodded in determination, she pulled another arrow back and let it loose. It tore through the air and split Hanabi's previous bull's-eye arrow right down the middle.

Hanabi let loose a breath and wiped the sweat off of her forehead, Yumi did a golf-clap and ushered Hanabi into the shade.

"I'm impressed Hanabi, most people I train take weeks to progress as much as you have in a single morning."

Hanabi nodded. "Arigato, Tachibana-sensei."

Yumi handed some Onigiri to Hanabi from a small basket she'd hidden behind the tree they were eating beneath. Hanabi enthusiastically took the rice clumps and began inhaling them one by one, after she'd gone through three, she swallowed and tugged on Yumi's pant-leg.

"Tachibana-sensei, aside from the assistance with my bow, I'd like to inquire about two more things."

Yumi smiled and pulled a thermos out of her basket. "Normally I'd refuse, but seeing how you learn so quickly, training you full-time won't interfere with my other commitments."

Hanabi was surprised, though her expression was one of blank astonishment.

"Thank you, I believe I will take you up on your offer, however my inquiries are of a different nature."

Yumi took a sip of her tea and sat on her knees. "Please, ask away."

Hanabi showcased an unsettling and devious smirk on her face for a moment, Yumi noticed this and discreetly chuckled behind her teacup, her curiosity was piqued by Hanabi's sudden display of emotion.

The young girl began speaking.

"I have been doing some research concerning Konoha's history, and more specifically, the Tachibana clan. Your people are only mentioned in passing in the records of village history, which means that they share no formal ties with Konoha. The most mentions of your clan are located within the biographical information of the Yondaime Hokage…"

Yumi took another sip of her tea and filled in the blanks.

"Yes. As you probably know, Minato Namikaze was not born in Konoha, he is technically a native of Tachibana Grove, a small village in northwest Fire Country. Since he was a first generation ninja, he was shipped off to Konoha in order to gain some sort of political standing with the ninja families of Fire Country. My clan has served as the Namikaze family's personal retainers and guardians for generations, predating even the founding of Konoha… The vast majority of us were lost in the Kyuubi attack 15 years ago. We had to buy enough time for the 4th to take the bijuu down."

Hanabi nodded. "I see… So that makes Naruto Uzumaki the son of 4th Hokage."

Yumi raised her eyebrow.

Hanabi continued to elaborate. "I had figured as much when my father had no complaints concerning Uzumaki-san's pedigree when my sister began courting him. The truth of his lineage was sequestered away from the public conscience, however, my father accepted Hinata's wishes without any objections. Concurrently, his bodyguard bears a great resemblance to you, Tachibana-sensei, I would assume she is your daughter."

Yumi calmly took another sip of her tea. "So, what else have you deduced about Naruto Uzumaki?"

Hanabi stuffed another rice ball into her mouth and spoke after she swallowed it.

"Tachibana-sensei, my curiosity is benign, I only wish for your assistance in acquiring his affections, as I wish to bear his children upon the consummation of our marriage."

Yumi nearly choked on her tea, following the sputtering, she stared at the little girl with a strange air of amusement. Yumi then placed the cup on the ground and looked at the young girl before her.

"… Interesting… Having one of Konoha's potential heiresses in the family would benefit the Namikaze line in the future… However, I've yet to meet Naruto in person… Nevertheless, I'll assist you in any way I can once he returns from his mission, meet me here tomorrow, I'll be here at the same time."

Hanabi nodded. "Also, I would be much obliged if you would allow me to adapt some of your taijutsu style into my Jyuken."

Yumi scratched her chin. "Resonable enough. However, you'll need to progress with your Kyujutsu, the bow mastery contains some skills you'll need to effectively learn my clan's Taijutsu form, also… Nevermind, we'll discuss this later, just remember, come here tomorrow, the same time as you did today."

Hanabi stood up and bowed. "Thank you, Tachibana-sensei." The young girl turned around and began smirking, but the devious look disappeared the instant Yumi delivered her parting words for the day.

"Oh Hanabi! There's no need for any deception, I'll play your little game, for now… _Sayonara._"

Hanabi turned back to look at Yumi as she left, a look of surprise adorned her face, she silently continued on her way after a few seconds of eye contact with her new teacher, the smug look on Yumi's face made Hanabi begin to reevaluate her plan, now that she brought the older woman into the picture.

Hanabi spoke underneath her breath. "I look forward to working with you, Tachibana-sensei."

The young Hyuga clutched her bow and made her way toward the Hyuga compound, she decided that it was a good time to begin planning her next move, especially now, with both Yumi _**and**_ the Hokage in her corner.

* * *

Naruto elected to spend his day aimlessly walking through the dusty streets of Sunagakure, he was of course, attracting a bit of unwanted attention despite the fact that he'd elected to go "incognito" for the day, having chosen some all-black attire, a long sleeved t-shirt and some baggy ninja pants.

However, between the golden blonde hair, and his striking facial features, he was having no luck in his endeavor to go unnoticed… not that it mattered to the boy. Naruto's stroll had taken him to a bustling marketplace, a bazaar in which various merchants peddled their goods to potential customers. The blonde was lost in thought, seeing as he never really had much time to reflect on the mission he'd just completed, this moment to reflect was as good a time as any.

Of course, he was happy that the entire team came out alive, Kakashi had recently notified Naruto that the ANBU who were originally accompanying the squad were going to make a full recovery after Itachi's genjutsu attack. However, this was still a very bittersweet victory for Naruto, after all that happened, his thoughts would always settle on the image of Haku's pained expression, her realization that she'd been dragged back into a world that she loved, yet could no longer be truly part of.

No matter how many times Gaara embraced him, and no matter how many times Naruto's budding relationship with Anko occupied his thoughts, he still felt just as empty as he did before he'd filled the void in his life with the people he called his friends.

'_What am I missing now?'_

Naruto's tenant opted to chime in. _**'Dammit Kit, is this really that difficult to understand? How can you expect to move forward in life if your past keeps getting in your way?'**_

'_But what do I even do at this point? I've tried to let go but…'_

'_**I speak literally when I tell you this; your past is physically interfering with your life. The female, from the bridge… She was your mate, correct?'**_

'_Well… Not exactly.'_

'_**Hn, human relationships... My point still stands; you're being ripped to shreds, pulled in all different directions. Root your feet, stand your ground, and go your own way. You're too fixated on playing every angle, take a breath, and for once in your life, focus on what really matters.'**_

'… _And what exactly is that? I've got a promise to worry about, a convoluted love-life, and on top of that, I've got a kinjutsu to eradicate.'_

'_**That's for you to decide… I wouldn't know what matters the most to humans, the way in which you function is a mystery to me, seeing as we're nothing alike.' **_

Naruto smirked as he disappeared into the crowd at the bazaar. _'… Thanks.'_

'_**That wasn't a complement, Kit. Nevertheless, you can start by finding the pink one and fucking the shit out of her, I know that you've been trying to avoid her ever since you woke up this morning.'**_

'… _I suppose you're right... not about the fucking part though… Hey, what's up with your progress on my condition?'_

'_**Talk to the pink female and return home... Maybe then I'll tell you.'**_

'… _You suck.'_

'… _**You're welcome.'**_

* * *

Sakura had her trademark "horrified smile" on display. In her excursion through Sunagakure's streets, her thoughts were focused on her feelings concerning Naruto and Sasuke, though they dipped into impurity when she spotted a bookstore in the corner of her vision.

Before Sakura realized what she was doing, she was standing outside the window, staring at a display set of Icha Icha's newest edition, the one Kakashi-sensei was reading through at the moment. Sakura counted some change in her hand and realized that she had just enough to buy it; she clutched the change tighter and gulped.

Sweat started to appear on her forehead as she stood there in the busy street, just staring at the book in the window. She could feel it mocking her, with its forbidden fruit. Sakura's eyes darted back and forth between the display and her change; she took another step toward the doorway.

Even though she was fighting it at every turn, Sakura could feel the store pulling her toward the entrance bit by bit.

Sakura's body felt as if it were moving on its own and she took another step toward the bookstore, with every step, her face became more and more like her hair.

'_**SHANNARO! YOU CAN DO IT! JUST A FEW MORE STEPS GODDAMMIT!'**_

'_No. No. No. NO! Why am I doing this?! What if I read something I don't want to hear?!'_

'_**Well, Kakashi-sensei DID say that it was only BASED on Naruto. It's not like it's his raunchy biography or something.'**_

'… _Oh. … Okay.'_

Sakura shakily put another foot forward; the density of the crowd hid the awkwardness of her approach. After another awkwardly long pause, she shook her head rapidly and massaged her temples. After a few more seconds of thought, Sakura figured that she'd rather have it and decide not to read it as opposed to the other way around, with this thought process, she was able to compose herself, well, for a few seconds at least. When she was inside the store she froze up as soon as she picked up the copy of Icha Icha and realized that she'd have to get in line with everyone else in the store.

Sakura's face went from pink to crimson, she was matching her shirt at this point. Sakura began looking around for something, anything that would make it feel less awkward on her end of the purchase.

At that very instant, she had an idea; she hastily grabbed two other books from an adjacent shelf next to the brightly colored Icha Icha display, then raced to the front of the store to buy her books.

Sakura lucked out (or so she thought); she'd gotten in the 5th spot in a rather lengthy line. The queue inched forward as each person completed their purchase, as she took a step forward, Sakura began to have a gut feeling, and not one that signaled good things to come.

She looked around nonchalantly, as to hide the alarming feeling she was getting; two surveys of her field of vision yielded nothing, little did she know, a certain blonde ninja had spotted her from a roof on the other side of the street. Not only that, Sakura was about to bump into a familiar face, and it wasn't Naruto's that she'd be seeing (well, not yet at least).

A moment's wait is what put Sakura at the front of the line, she took a deep breath and handed the small stack of books forward, a wrinkly hand took them from her and there was a moment of silence as the books were priced, then, there was a chuckle.

Sakura sighed and figured this would be the case, so she just faked a grin and looked at the cashier, her grin immediately faded when she realized who the person behind the counter was.

"Hmmm. Some reading material for the road?"

Sakura stared in horror at the owner of the wrinkly hand, it was Chiyo, of all the people in the world that could run a bookstore in their spare time, it had to be Chiyo.

"H-hi Lady Chiyo! Wh-what're you doing here?"

Chiyo took a minute to squint at the titles of the books, after a quick examination, she smirked and spoke quietly. The ambient noise from the store and the busy streets made it so that Sakura was the only one that could hear the elderly woman speak.

"I'm old! I need something to occupy all this spare time I have, so I own a bookstore… However, I never expected you'd be into _**these**_ sorts of books, Sakura."

Sakura turned pink again and whispered energetically. "_**These**_? As in plural?!"

Chiyo put the books in a paper bag and handed them to Sakura. "Between Icha Icha, _**THE **_Kama Sutra, and… heh! _Married Love: Reigniting the Spark, _you're in no position to play dumb."

Sakura gasped and went Hinata Hyuga's trademark shade of red. "Nani? … K-Kama Sutra?"

Sakura wiped another bead of sweat off of her forehead, there was a miniscule pause and before Sakura could say anything, Chiyo cut her off with a smirk.

"To late! Already rang you up… that'll be 7000 ryo, Pinky."

Sakura pouted and reached for her wallet. She only carried a little bit of emergency money on her when she went on missions. She counted off the bills and once she finished, she nearly cried, 7200 ryo, that was all she had this time around.

If Sakura didn't pay, she'd be faced with the embarrassing task of being turned away at the counter, and everyone would see what she was trying to buy. Sakura groaned and pulled out the small stack of bills, leaving herself with barely enough money to do anything with, maybe purchase a single kunai, or maybe a couple of sticks of pocky.

Chiyo, being one to rub salt in the wound at any given opportunity, grabbed Sakura's wrist just as she handed over the money.

"Remember, it's all in the hips, there's nothing to worry about… _**especially **_not for you… make him cry tears of joy dear!"

Sakura looked down at her belly button and sighed in defeat, she took the bag and hurried past the line of people, who had all seemed to take some form of interest in Sakura's conversation with the cashier.

Sakura slipped back out into the crowded and dusty streets, the many faces surrounding her made her feel anonymous, sadly, there was no way she could hide from anyone, especially with that hair of hers. She crossed the street and slipped into an alleyway, likely headed back to the Kazekage's tower, she popped out of the alley into another street and blended into the crowd.

After a few minutes of walking unimpeded, Sakura noticed a cat scuttling around on the ground, she took care to step around it, and as she did so, she was stopped, she felt like she had run into a brick wall.

She was eye to chest with a black t-shirt; she looked up, and saw a familiar pair of bright blue eyes with slitted pupils. Sakura's green eyes darted down to her bag of dirty books and she turned bright red.

It was true that she wanted to talk to Naruto ASAP, but of all times for him to bump into her, why now?

Sakura's breathing sped up and she clutched the bag of books even tighter, she gave Naruto an alarmed squeal and turned around and tried to scuttle off in the other direction, but she immediately felt a pair of strong hands grab her by the upper arms and casually lift her a few inches off of the ground.

"Sakura-chan… this is important, I really want to talk to you."

Sakura looked down at her books again, and like a teapot reaching optimum temperature she began to panic. She tried to say something, but the past few minutes had left her composure completely gone, she was about to tell Naruto that she'd meet up with him at the tower in about 30 minutes, but Naruto just had to say the worst possible thing he could say in this scenario. What little composure Sakura had in that moment was completely destroyed when Naruto opened his mouth.

"Oh, did you go shopping? … Books huh? I've been meaning to catch up on my reading… Do you mind if I borrow one from y-"

Sakura screamed in horror, she didn't even let Naruto finish his sentence. Without thinking, she did the first thing that came to mind and swung one of her legs backward, it connected right between Naruto's legs. The sudden jolt of pain caused Naruto to throw Sakura across the street, she landed on a stand full of cabbages, completely destroying it.

The entire street had already ground to a halt to watch Naruto and Sakura's odd exchange, but with Naruto doubled over in pain, and Sakura was lying in a ruined pile of wooden planks and exploded cabbage, the crowd of people had parted like the red sea, this left the two ninja completely exposed.

Sakura was about to stand up, but was disoriented when a sign fell from the cabbage stand and hit her on the head. She looked at the sign and it said _"out for lunch will return at 1:30"._

She quickly got up and dusted herself off, taking one look at the tattered stand; she sprinted forward, picked up Naruto and rocketed off into the sky.

"Naruto? Naruto-kun?!"

She waited for a reply, but after a few seconds, she realized that Naruto was out cold.

Sakura groaned and whimpered as she thought to herself.

'_Perfect, I start off our conversation by kicking him between the legs… of all the stupid-'_

'**SHANNAROOOOOOOO! YOU FUCKING IDIOT!'**

'_Gee, thanks…'_

She peered over her shoulder at Naruto's glazed over eyes, she figured she could treat him at the tower, Sakura didn't want this one to be on the books at all, she slapped her forehead before offering another apology.

"… Sorry, Naruto."

* * *

Anko slowly opened the door and poked her head into Tsunade's office, she spoke casually.

"What's up? Your summon sounded important."

Tsunade turned around in her chair and motioned for Anko to come sit down across from her. Anko slithered across the room and into the chair, she had her characteristic grin on her face as she looked around the room, waiting for the Hokage to start speaking.

"Anko-chan, I've been meaning to ask you about your ranking… Tokubetsu-Jonin is it?"

"Yup! I'm an infiltrator by trade, though I haven't been doing much infiltration lately."

Tsunade nodded and took a sip of sake from a mug; she seemed rather somber for such a nice day.

"Your rank doesn't really reflect your skillset at this point in time, and as such, I've just recently sideways-promoted you to full Jonin status… However, that was only one reason that I called you here, the other has much larger implications."

Anko sunk backward in her seat; she became visibly nervous as the silence in the room became painfully suspenseful.

Tsunade broke the silence. "I don't do this lightly Anko-chan… I'm offering you a place among the ANBU."

Anko's eyes widened for a second, but then a smirk slithered its way across her face.

"… Hmm. Sounds like a real challenge… However, I'd like time to think about it, I've heard stories, and I know that there's a _**really**_ high fatality rate… Huh. Maybe it's not such a good idea."

Tsunade nodded. "I understand, I'm just putting it out there for you. While we could really use your skillset, I don't want you to feel obligated to do this, know that being part of ANBU is a full-time commitment… I'd understand completely if you don't want to, especially since you've taken such a liking to Naruto."

Anko stared Tsunade down for a few seconds, then she grinned. "You been keeping taps on me Tsunade? I didn't figure it'd be all that important to you."

Tsunade smirked and looked at a portrait of herself on the wall for a moment. "… I have my reasons. You were the last one I'd expect to be part of this circus."

Anko's grin widened. "Yeah, I know right! He's still a kid! Weird ain't it?"

Tsunade took another sip from her mug. "That's an understatement. Try to play nice with the other girls, okay?"

Anko scoffed. "Heh, yeah right! You know I'm incapable of that."

Tsunade sighed and casually hid the bottle of Sake beneath the desk, an instant later, Shizune walked into the office with a stack of paperwork, she smiled at Anko and placed it on the desk before glaring at Tsunade's fancy new mug.

"Tsunade-sama… are you drinking on the job again."

Tsunade gave Shizune a lazy stare and paused for a long time before smirking. "Of course not... It's tea."

The Hokage punctuated her sentence with another sip while Anko was trying not to laugh.

Shizune glared at Anko. "And what exactly are you laughing at, Anko?"

Anko flicked her long tongue at Shizune and smiled. "You're being a bit bitchier than usual today. Rough date last night?"

Shizune stared down at Anko with a bored expression; there was a silence as a slightly amused Tsunade looked back and forth between the two women.

Anko continued antagonizing her peer. "Relax! us "Old Maids" are in style now, soon there'll be guys lining up in no time!"

Shizune placed her hands on her hips and glared. "Speak for yourself, cradle-robber, I'm sorry I prefer men my own age."

Anko jumped up on her chair and gave Shizune a mischievous grin. "I bet you won't be so smug when I'm dating your son! If you ever have a boy, I'm not even gonna let him graduate the Academy!"

Shizune stared incredulously at Anko, who was obviously enjoying her verbal duel with the Hokage's former apprentice, after another stare down, Shizune grumbled and took Tsunade's mug, replacing it with a pen. She walked out of the room and poured the "tea" into the trashcan as she left.

Tsunade nonchalantly produced another mug from a compartment in her desk and refilled it with her secret Sake bottle.

"Anko-chan, you're going to ruin my happy hour if you don't tone yourself down around Shizune."

Anko raised her eyebrow and pointed at the clock. "Tsunade… it's 11:45."

Tsunade raised the bottle in the air and spoke flatly before muttering something to herself.

"So I'm a few hours off. I've been stressed out lately... _–Jiraiya you reckless oaf-_"

Anko tightened her hair-tie and shook her head. "… You drink too much."

Tsunade's uninterested expression and rosy cheeks signaled that she was too buzzed to really care.

"You're probably right… Meh."

She took a drag from the bottle instead of the mug.

Anko just shook her head and smiled before hopping out of Tsunade's window

* * *

~_Unknown Location_

Sasuke was sitting on a stool in the far corner of the operating room while Karin tenderly went over his cuts and scratches from his mission in Sunagakure. Sasuke wasn't the patient in this operating room however; the real patient lie strapped to the table, and was a gruesome sight to behold. In all honesty, Sasuke was only there out of morbid curiosity, he watched intently as his master paced around the table with as gleeful look in his eye, as if he were a child in a candy store.

Karin whispered as to not draw attention away from the main event in the room.

"So, I take it you enjoyed the onigiri."

Sasuke nodded. "Hn."

Karin smiled and tugged Sasuke's shirt, signaling him to remove it, she continued to speak in a hushed tone.

"This'd be the last thing I'd want to see after a mission… Orochimaru-dono interrogating someone I mean."

Sasuke exposed his back and allowed her to start stitching up the small gashes, he replied quickly.

"I was curious, I've heard some… disturbing things about this Akatsuki member."

Karin continued to ogle Sasuke's back muscles while she cleaned his wounds.

"That aside, I've seen my fair share of interrogations, many more than you have. He never ceases to make me lose my appetite."

Sasuke's stomach growled. "… Speaking of appetites, is there anything to eat here besides rice-flavored food pills?"

Karin smirked and started threading a needle for stitching. "Great news, I hear Orochimaru-dono ordered a shipment of a new flavor."

Sasuke raised his eyebrow and turned his head to look at Karin. "What flavor?"

Karin's smirk turned mischievous in nature. "Tofu flavor, from what I hear."

A few arcs of electricity came off of Sasuke as he turned back around to watch the interrogation.

"You can't be serious."

Karin, slightly annoyed with Sasuke, responded by jamming her thumb into one of Sasuke's cuts.

"Sadly, I am... Now stop that. You've popped one of your stitches out."

Sasuke winced and took a deep breath, then, the electricity subsided. "… Just stitch me up Karin."

Karin rolled her eyes and got back to work on Sasuke's back, she spoke with a sarcastic bent. "… You're welcome, Sasuke-kun."

Kabuto stood at the door sharpening his scalpel, likely preparing it for another one of Orochimaru's morally reprehensible experiments. He briefly turned his attention to Sasuke, who was sitting in the corner, he watched as they quietly chatted amongst themselves as Orochimaru did his thing.

Sasuke's eyes met with Kabuto's and he gave the Uchiha a raised eyebrow coupled with a smirk. Kabuto and Sasuke had been on numerous missions together over the past couple of years, so they were at a point in which they could communicate non-verbally, Sasuke's eyes narrowed a bit when he realized what Kabuto was alluding to, his mind went back to their conversation in the hotel.

"_You know, Orochimaru-sama would be thrilled to have the Uchiha Clan make their return in Oto instead of Konoha. I'm sure Karin would be more than willing to assist you with that, Sasuke-san."_

Sasuke glared at his partner-in-crime and after a few seconds of staring each other down, Sasuke rolled his eyes and returned his attention to Orochimaru's interrogation. Kabuto chuckled to himself, he enjoyed mocking the young Uchiha, though in this case, he considered Karin less of a punchline and more of an eventuality.

Orochimaru would be dancing if I were a better writer, I honestly can't describe how that would look, but his excitement was palpable as periodically flicked his tongue.

"Kukukuku… of all the Akatsuki members I could have potentially killed, didn't expect to capture _**you**_ with my plan… However, I feel this will work in my favor... immensely_**. **__So, tell me, what's your secret_?"

The man strapped to the table smiled at the Sannin and cocked his head to the side. "… You're first."

Orochimaru stopped pacing and sneered at his captive. "Pardon?"

The man's grin became more and more ecstatically blood-lusted the longer he talked.

"When I get off this table, you're gonna be my first sacrifice… oh, **Jashin's gonna fucking love you**."

Orochimaru's fangs glistened and he licked his lips in anticipation before ushering Kabuto and his medical equipment over to the operating table.

"Kukukukuku… I see, now tell me about this… _Jashin_."

* * *

**AN: Looks like "Hokage or Bust" took the polls by storm; it's looking like we'll have a more driven and slightly quirkier version of Naruto for the prequel story. As for those of you who wanted the "Strong Idiot" version of him, I suppose I can squeeze in some gags here and there involving some brute force and stupid antics, this is Naruto we're talking about after all. For the most part however, we'll focus on Naruto starting his path to the Hokage's tower.**

**Signin' Off**

**~Breath of the Wiz**

**FINAL VOTE TOTALS**

**43 Votes**

"_**Hokage or Bust" Naruto:**_ This potential portrayal will make Naruto more of the _"Pampered Orphan" _variety, a la Young Bruce Wayne. In my canon, Kakashi, Jiraiya, and the 3rd Hokage are much bigger parts of Naruto's early life, and in this portrayal _specifically_; they're actively grooming him to be the Hokage one day. He'll still be a hyperactive prankster, but he'll also be a bit more goal oriented, even going so far as to blow off a _mildly_ interested Sakura to train or learn about the previous Kage. His relationship with Sakura will grow more complex in order to bring him in line with his Orange Flash incarnation; the transition wouldn't make sense otherwise because Orange Flash Naruto is in love with Sakura. His doomed relationship with Haku will be his primary source of motivation to be the Hokage, because at first, he'll feel like he was forced onto his path and sort of apathetically walk toward it.

**30 Votes**

"_**Strong Idiot" Naruto**_: This Naruto isn't "_stupid_" per se, he just functions on the idea that; **"If it doesn't work, you didn't hit it hard enough."** What's makes him different from Canon!Naruto, is that he actually has the physical abilities to back up his brutish approach to life. Naruto's the strongest genin in the class, tied with Sasuke. Normally, this would have him put on another team for balancing purposes, but he's assigned to Team 7 because his high grades concerning his physical abilities don't average well with his abysmal grades in the more mental intensive categories (i.e. espionage, stealth, strategy, etc.) Hilarity ensues as Kakashi constantly tries and fails to teach Naruto the importance of finesse in shinobi life (i.e. that being a walking hammer doesn't make all of your problems nails). He'll get on Sasuke's nerves from time to time with his uncanny ability to solve everything with force. This version of Naruto will gradually balance out his skill set over the course of the story, this way, he'll be more in line with his older-self in the main story. Haku's death will cause him to reevaluate his approach to shinobi life, this forces him to place more emphasis on using his mind, as he'll feel that he could have saved Haku where he a more well-rounded ninja.

**22 Votes**

"_**Two-Face" Naruto: **_This version of Naruto _**isn't**_ dark, hyper intelligent, or brooding _(leave that shit to Sasuke… or Batman… __**Dark!Naruto is ridiculous. Stop it.**__)_, this version merely has two distinct sides, happy go-lucky, and listless solitude. Kishimoto mentions it, but doesn't elaborate on such an important piece of Naruto as a character. I'll delve into his loneliness a bit more in this incarnation; Team 7 (except Kakashi) will generally hate his guts until they understand how truly damaged Naruto is as a person. For this Naruto, his complex nature is what sows the initial seeds of Sakura's attraction to him. His transition to the Naruto we see in Orange Flash will happen during the training trip as he learns to discard his mask and show the underneath (i.e. a matter of fake smiles vs. real ones).

**16 Votes**

_**Delinquent Naruto: **_ This version is as close as I'll go to _Dark!_Naruto. He's brash, chirpy, confrontational, and **violently** temperamental. The entire class, save for Sasuke and Hinata is scared shitless of him. I believe Naruto has every right to be angry at the world, even in my canon with Kakashi, Jiraiya, and the 3rd Hokage as his surrogate family. While Naruto has been adequately provided for in my canon, his guardians still keep him in the dark, and by extension, at a distance. Because he can't know the truth of his lineage quite yet, and due to the fact that Naruto's guardians all had close relationships with his parents, Naruto has no one to talk to... he's just frustrated. His experience with Haku and Zabuza will mellow him out so that he gradually becomes more in sync with his personality in Orange flash.


	36. Chapter 36: Boiling Point

AN: Sup guys, Here's #36. I had a few personal issues get in the way, so I'm feeling eager to start writing again. Funny thing, this is actually the 2nd draft of chapter 36, since the first one couldn't make me laugh as I read through it (that's my humor metric when I vet my chapters now). The goal right now is to have Naruto back in Konoha ASAP so we can observe the impending cluster-fuck of hilarity. For those of you who aren't in the loop, _**PROLOGUE ORANGE HAS DROPPED**_, so go ahead and take a look because this chapter directly references Prologue Orange.

* * *

Sakura sat at the side of the bed with a grimace on her face, her hands were glowing a faint green as she hovered them over Naruto's crotch area.

Naruto, who was now semi-conscious, would occasionally mutter an incoherent set of words, none of which seemed to have any meaning to Sakura. She sighed and looked at the clock on the wall, it was approaching noon.

The medic thought to herself.

'If I'd kept my cool and made an excuse, we could've sorted this out by now.'

'_**SHANNARO! You could've fucked him too! We're falling behind!'**_

Rolling her eyes, she returned to healing Naruto. Sakura pondered the last time they were able to speak freely with each other, it was the evening Naruto came over and stayed the night at her house.

The blonde's words echoed through Sakura's mind.

_'I'll give you a hint, you were the first person to give me a reason to fight, think back on that when you have some time.'_

Now was as good a time as any for the pink haired teen to reflect on what she could have possibly done to become Naruto's muse. She played back the hectic night once more, and as usual, her sharp mind pulled up a potential solution to the problem.

'_You just don't remember why. A small act of kindness can mean the world to someone else, I'll let you figure that one out on your own, you're more than smart enough.'_

Sakura looked at Naruto's dazed expression and gave him a sheepish look.

"You told me you loved me that night... but I'm not sure what it was that I did for you to make that happen. You said so yourself that I gave you a reason to… fight…"

The realization gradually formed itself as she spoke to her semi-conscious teammate. Sakura thought back to Team 7's first real mission, no one involved came out unscathed, but Naruto had gotten the worst of it from what she could remember.

Sakura gave Naruto a mixed expression.

"That was the lowest I ever saw you, you know. As far as I could tell, you were invincible up until then, to act like nothing was wrong when you were in such pain… and one day, the floodgates finally gave in."

The memories of their conversation at Tazuna's house flooded her mind. "You know, I didn't think I made much of a difference with what I said to you, but I suppose I underestimated how much you needed to hear what I told you."

Naruto's words those years ago, stung more than any cut she'd ever experienced.

'_My guardians won't tell me much of anything about who I am, or where I came from, and people are either mean to me, or they try to ignore me… Something's going on, and it seems like everyone except me knows what it is.__** I'm just… lost.**__'_

With her free hand, Sakura rubbed a smudge off of Naruto's whisker marks and cupped the side of his face.

"There's so much I want to ask you… but even if you were awake, I'm not sure it would be the right time for us to talk about this mess."

Suddenly, out of nowhere, Naruto's eyes snapped open and he stared at her.

"Talk about what?"

Sakura nearly bit her tongue because of Naruto's sudden awakening, and she reflexively sprung to a standing position. The two ninja gave each other awkward stares until Naruto broke the silence.

"Sakura-chan… are you angry with me?"

Sakura shook her head rapidly, her cheeks began to flush as well.

Naruto chuckled and scratched the back of his head. "But... you kicked me… I guess I shouldn't have just grabbed you without permission, right?"

"That's-" Sakura spoke, but cut herself off at the last second before glancing at the bag of dirty books in the corner.

A suitable lie popped up in Sakura's mind, so she went with it, as the truth would be a bit much at the moment.

Sakura stood at attention, still visibly nervious. "I… was embarrassed. I bought some books on the female reproductive system… among other things. I'm trying to learn how to deliver babies since I want to work at the hospital once I complete my training."

Naruto at first nodded and appeared convinced for a moment, but then he gave Sakura a suspicious look.

"My gut's telling me something's off… Meh, it doesn't really matter, I trust you Sakura-chan."

Naruto punctuated his momentarily correct hunch with a foxy grin, this made Sakura blush and sit back in the chair next to his bed.

Sakura mentally kicked herself for that one; she should have known that it was almost impossible to lie to Naruto and not tip him off.

"Naruto-kun. I've wanted to talk to you for a while now, about your promise, but I need some time to think on that. Right now, I want to ask you something else… about the talk we had the day Haku… um."

Naruto's naturally upturned lips became a flat line at the mention of her name, he slouched and stared at the blankets on the bed.

"What about it, Sakura-chan?"

Sakura had a tiny smile on her face, and a visible blush.

"I don't mean to pull up any bad memories, but… Was that the _**"**__smallest act of kindness__**" **_you were talking about?"

Naruto's eyes widened a bit and he turned and looked at Sakura, who stared him in the eyes as she waited for him to answer, her eager expression made Naruto feel butterflies in his stomach.

The blonde smiled down at his hands. "It was… That was the day I started really paying attention to you, it didn't really hit me until Sasuke left, that I was in love with you."

"I see… Naruto-kun, can you do me a favor?"

Naruto smiled. "Of course."

Sakura took Naruto's hand and gave it a firm squeeze. "Please, don't change... Especially not for me."

Naruto smiled a tiny bit and looked out the window. "… I'll try, Sakura-chan."

* * *

Ino watched her mother, Rena, through the mirror's reflection. She carried the last of the boxes into Ino's room in her new apartment.

Rena placed the box on the mattress and walked up behind her daughter, she observed the heart-shaped housing for the mirror and stared at the lightbulbs that lined said housing.

"I never understood why you kept this ugly thing around, it's not even your style."

Ino looked at Rena through the reflection and smiled. "It really isn't, I just like the lights."

Rena placed her hands on Ino's shoulders and rested her chin on the top of her daughter's head.

"Ino, are you sure you want to move out? You may be a jonin now, but you're only 15, no one would bat an eye if you stuck around the house for a while longer."

The Yamanaka heiress smirked. "I would, but there's this boy…"

Rena grinned. "Boy? … Would this boy happen to be Naruto Uzumaki?"

Ino gave her mother an amused glance. "Is he that popular already?"

Rena laughed. "Everyone with a daughter's heard _**plenty**_ about him, probably a lot more than they'd prefer... It seems like he's quite the catch, what's the competition looking like?"

Ino's face dropped into a scowl. "Stiff. Everyone… literally everyone, from Anko Mitarashi to Hanabi Hyuga want to sink their teeth into him."

Rena laughed. "Anko-chan? You'd better get moving before that girl sinks _**her**_ teeth into him!"

Ino groaned. "I know, I know. I've had this conversation a billion times at this poi- OW! MOM!"

Rena was pinching Ino's cheek and pulling it. "You have a crush and you don't tell me until now?! When I heard that everyone was calling you the "Ice Queen of Konoha", I was starting to worry about you!"

Ino frowned up at her mother. "What was there to worry about?! I'm just selective!"

Rena gave Ino a haughty expression. "I don't know, you _**were **_hanging out with Sakura quite a lot."

"Mom... this is why I don't tell you anything."

Rena cocked her head to the side and raised her eyebrow. "Do you think I'm too overbearing?"

Ino yanked her cheek out of her mother's grasp. "Well yeah! You taught me the "three date" trick when I was eight! You're always so competitive!"

Rena frowned and pinched Ino's other cheek. "How do you think I got your father to notice me?! He was a complete _**pig**_ back when we were young, he had a different girl on his arm nearly every week!"

Ino sighed and ceased her struggle to escape the pinch, her mother let go shortly afterward.

"Asuma-sensei said I was thinking too much. So, I've tried being spontaneous, and it's been working out so far."

Rena stepped to the side and sat on the dresser next to Ino, she was facing the window and her daughter sat on her stool, staring at her reflection intently.

"Mom?"

"Hm?"

"What should I do with my hair? … For when Naruto gets back from his mission, we're supposed to go on a date."

Rena turned around to look at her daughter's reflection once more. "I used to wear my hair somewhat like that when I was young... People would legitimately mistake you for me if we were the same age... Try this!"

Rena quickly tied her daughter's hair into a long ponytail and let some bangs fall in front of her face.

"Mom! I always wear my hair like this!"

Rena smiled and fluffed Ino's hair. "Exactly. You look just like me, therefore, you look perfect."

Ino chuckled. "Oh, now you're just bragging."

Rena smirked. "No pumpkin, that was an observation. Just be yourself, and if all else fails… You _**do **__have my mother's __obnoxiously __proportional__ hourglass figure__**… **__which in my case, skipped a generation._"

Ino started laughing. "Mom, you're a mess."

Rena puffed out her chest. "A hot mess… Okay! Meet me halfway on this! Just one last scheme, I guarantee you'll want this up your sleeve for when Naruto comes back."

Ino sighed. "... I'll hear you out."

Rena gave Ino a mischevious grin. "Naruto won't know what hit him... Listen closely, Ino-chan…"

* * *

-"Oasis Rest Stop"; _**Fire Country Border-**_

"_No weapons in the bar… samurai."_

The intimidating figure reluctantly handed over his swords and his arrows_. "You lose these, I'll hunt you down and take every last ryo out of your ass. We clear, shinobi?"_

The ninja raised his eyebrow and stepped to the side to allow the samurai to enter the bar.

The muted chatter of the rest stop was shattered when a notably tall man swung open the doors of the bar. The noise gradually became silence as the intimidating figure sauntered over to the counter.

He wore a grey cloak, with black and silver armor beneath it, marking him as a denizen of the distant land of Tetsu no Kuni. This however, wasn't what made the room stop, the menpo on his kabuto helmet resembled a skull and obscured his entire face, save for his eyes… both of which appeared like green lights in a sea of darkness.

The bartender stared up at the imposing Samurai for what seemed like an eternity.

"…Is there… something on my face?" His voice had a tinny sort of distortion to it.

This defused the tension in the room somewhat, but even then, all eyes in the room were on him.

The bartender twitched and let out a nervous laugh, and eventually, she managed to regain some semblance of composure.

"Right then. What can I get you today, sir?"

The Samurai paused for a moment. "_Well, that depends… _What's the legal drinking age in this province?"

"21… _sir_… how old _**are**_ you?"

The samurai rubbed a smear of blood off of one of his gauntlets and replied in an amused tone. "Hn. Not old enough apparently… It's fine, I'll just have some rose tea and some pork dumplings."

The Samurai handed her a few coins and watched her as she began making him his tea. He noticed in his peripheral vision, that there were several pairs of eyes locked on him, he turned to his right to see all the patrons sitting at the bar staring at him, for apparently no particular reason, they had the look of a group of bandits.

A voice came from the side. "That's some nice armor you got there, shame if somethin' was to happen to it."

The young man slowly looked to his right. "The fuck're you implying Sasquatch? What, you see something you like?"

The largest of the group stood up, and despite the Samurai's apparent height, the large man was even taller.

The man growled. "No, not much… All I see is a young punk that's compensatin' for something."

The masked youth scoffed. "Oh, really? I'm failing to understand where you're coming from, seeing as you're dressed like a common thug. Lemme guess… bandits?"

The giant man cracked his knuckles. "That's a serious accusation to be throwin' around, kid."

The glowing green eyes twinkled with legitimate amusement. "Oh, excuse my coarse language, "aggressive redistributors"… that's what they're calling it now, right?"

The men started to become angry, a rather plain looking one spoke up. "Listen here, kid. People that cross us don't live very long, be they shinobi or otherwise. We're much more than common rabble, and you'd best hold your tongue before you go picking fights you can't finish... Especially when you accuse someone of being a thug."

The samurai leaned on the counter, his posture indicated boredom. "I don't make accusations, just observations… Like the fact that my codpiece is worth more than all of you put together."

The large man tightened his fists and glared down at the armor-clad individual, the sound of his knuckles cracking was audible to anyone within speaking distance.

The bartender glared at the two men and spoke sternly. "If you two are planning on fighting, take it outside! Otherwise you'll have to deal with them." She pointed to several leaf-jonin who were standing at the door to the bar.

The large man took a deep breath and slowly exhaled, he motioned toward one of his compatriots.

"Alright skull-face, if your codpiece is so expensive, let's see you put your money where your mouth is… Hario?"

A scrawny man whipped out a box and gave the samurai a shit-eating grin, he opened the box, revealing a set of dice and a small wooden bowl.

The large man crossed his arms and smirked. "You a bettin' man?"

The samurai scoffed again. "I don't bet trash, I burn it. Unless… What're the stakes?"

The giant smirked. "If we win, you give us all your armor and weapons."

The samurai nodded. "And if I win?"

The tall man bent over until he was eye to eye with the young man. "You get to live."

The samurai rolled his eyes. "I'm shitting myself. Seeing as you have nothing of value… I'll accept a formal apology."

The giant scoffed. "Whatever you say, samurai. Hario, set him up."

The men made some space on the counter for the dice game and the samurai glared at the dice and then gave Hario a suspicious look. The bartender handed the samurai his tea while she eyed the dice game with a sort of nervous intrigue.

Hario shook the tiny bowl and shook it around for a few seconds, he was intentionally building suspense, the attention of the various patrons began to shift toward the men at the center of the room.

It was here that the samurai abruptly clamped his hand down on Hario's bowl, the men stood up, as if ready to fight.

The skull spoke. "Stop being an ass."

The spindly man just stared in confusion for a moment before speaking. "Uh, right… take your bets."

The samurai spoke with a hint of venom in his voice. "Deuces."

The giant followed suit with a smug grin. "Snake eyes."

Hario slowly lifted the bowl and the silent bar was gradually met with the laughter of the samurai.

The group of men stared incredulously at the dice, which both showed 2, making the samurai the winner of the bet.

The giant slammed the top of the bar. "Think this is funny? Best 2 out of 3!"

The Samurai shrugged and replied in a mocking tone. "Are you sure you wanna do that? I'm feeling _**lucky**_**.**"

The giant slowly twisted his face into a sneer. "… You're cheating. I don't know how, but you're doing something."

The samurai shrugged and inspected the gauntlet on his free hand. "Is it really cheating when the game is rigged?"

The question was punctuated by a cracking sound and a scream. Hario's fingers had been broken, his hand was a heap of bruises and twisted bones.

"You clowns are using magnetic dice."

The scrawny man bent down and clutched his hand while the larger prepared to punch the samurai in the face. The samurai in turn, rushed forward and head-butted the oncoming fist, there was an audible *ping* and a crunching sound as well. Now, two men were crouching on the ground, clutching broken hands.

"What're you idiots doing?! Kick this punk's ass!" The giant motioned toward the samurai, and two of them rushed the samurai, however, the rest of the men seemed to hesitate.

One of the bandits whipped out a tiny knife from his sleeve, he aimed his strike at he gaps in the samurai's armor.

The samurai countered by nonchalantly taking his bow off of his belt and slamming it into the attacker's temple. There was a crunch, and the man fell to the ground in a heap.

The second attacker, who had moved behind the samurai, was preparing to knock him out from behind. The samurai responded with the world's most disinterested back kick, connecting perfectly with the thug's face. The man was sent skidding out the door, nearly knocking over one of the ninja standing guard outside.

It was here that the leaf-ninja rushed back into the bar and restrained the group of thieves, as well as the samurai… however; the term 'restrained' is a generous description of how the armor-clad warrior was being detained.

A kunoichi, who was literally half his size, was trying to restrain him by holding his arms in place, but to no avail.

"Exuse me miss. I wanna at least finish my tea before you all throw me out. I _**did **_pay for it."

The samurai reached for the steaming cup on the counter… with the jonin lady still attached to his arm, her feet were dragging along the wood floor in an attempt to hold him in place.

"Uh… Guys? This one's a lot stronger than he looks! A little help please?"

Another jonin, still a head shorter than the Samurai dashed behind him and grabbed him by the torso.

"Hey! Skull-face! Slow your roll before we have to hurt you!"

The samurai grabbed his tea and dumplings, and then he sighed. "I haven't eaten in 36 hours, if you try and stop me, I'm gonna have to fight you… As you can tell I'm not in a particularly good mood… Besides, these limp-dicks were harassing me."

The Kunoichi on the samurai's arm snapped. "We know! We're trying to keep you from killing them!"

The other ninja added his two cents as well. "You samurai always answer disrespect with excessive violence! You can stay, if you promise to leave this were it is, we'll escort these men outside."

The Samurai took a deep breath and agreed to let the rest of them leave with their ability to walk. The group of jonin walked toward the door, but not before one of them turned back and ushered one last warning.

"Keep it clean metal-head."

The young man chuckled, taking his tea and dumplings from the counter. He tossed some extra money to the bartender.

"Sorry about the commotion, miss."

The woman accepted the money, but was visibly weary of the tall suit of armor.

"Thank you, and word to the wise, watch your back around here, young man. This part of the world has a nasty history with the samurai, people will want a shot at you simply because you have that armor on."

The young man clanked his gauntlet on his chest plate. "I'm a samurai, it comes with the territory."

It at first appeared there was nowhere to sit down, but off in the furthest corner of the bar, he saw a single unoccupied seat across from a strange man. He shrugged and walked over, sitting down and making eye contact with the strange man.

The Samurai placed his teacup on the table and fiddled with the leather straps on his greaves while he addressed the man at the table. "I'll be outta your hair soon enough, just passing through…"

The samurai trailed off for a moment when he noticed the distinctive mask that the man was wearing.

"Nice mask, but if you're trying to avoid drawing attention to yourself, bright orange isn't the best of colors."

The man in question peered up from his book and closed it. "I suppose you have a point…" he trailed off, signaling for the Samurai to provide a name of some sort.

"Kouta, Just... Kouta. I'd ask your name… but I don't particularly care."

The masked man seemed somewhat amused. "At least you're honest... No matter, my name is of no importance… Tell me, what brings a Samurai this far East? I'd assume family, seeing as you're obviously not a Tetsu no Kuni native."

Kouta removed his kabuto helmet and placed it on the table, revealing a tan complexion with ebony hair, it was tied in a short wolf tail with the rest shaved off on the sides.

Kouta gave the man a strange look. "So, what else can you deduce from just looking at me?"

"It's quite simple really, between your eyes, complexion, height… and well, this bow…"

The masked man immediately placed Kouta's bow on the table for emphasis.

"I'd mark you as a Tachibana…"

Kouta discreetly checked his waistband, only to find it missing his precious bow; he gave the masked man a suspicious look before reclaiming his weapon from the table.

Kouta frowned. "I would have noticed if you tried to take that from me… Whatever you just did wasn't a matter of speed or stealth."

The masked man looked out of the window at the road. "You're not wrong… simply put, there's more to **anyone** than they appear to let on. Most of which, you can find in their eyes…"

Kouta smirked. "Agreed… Case and point, you seem like the kinda guy who's out to change the world... you've also got the eye of a man that's been stolen from… Am I wrong there?"

The masked man snapped his head to Kouta and locked eyes with the young samurai, they just stared at each other in silence.

Kouta took a sip of tea and leaned backward. "I'll take that as a yes."

There was another silence until Kouta broke it. "So, what's someone like you doing in this area?"

The orange mask turned to face Kouta, and if he could see the man's face, there'd probably be a look of suspicion adorning his features.

"I come here to think… I have plans for the future... That's all… I came here as a genin once, however, those days are long behind me."

Kouta adjusted one of his shoulder plates and sipped his tea. "Hn. Seems like everyone has a "special place" except me… Hey, gramps."

The masked man cocked his head to the side. "Gramps?"

Kouta smirked. "Well, yeah. Regardless of how old you actually are, you look like you've seen enough shit to be eligible for that title. Hell, spiritually, you're at least old enough to be my dad."

The man shook his head in amusement. "Heh. Perhaps that's the point."

Kouta chuckled and raised an eyebrow. "I'm impressed, you don't look like the type of guy that has a sense of humor."

"I'm not a joyless man… There's just not much to smile about these days."

Kouta smirked. "So, I'm guessing your so called "plan" has something to do with correcting that."

The masked man crossed his arms. "Perhaps it does…"

He leaned back in his chair and stared at the ceiling for a moment, then looked Kouta directly in the eye.

"Do you have someone close to you?"

Kouta sputtered and struggled to swallow a dumpling. He washed it down with some tea before replying.

"Yeah. She's back in Tetsu no Kuni. What of it?"

The masked man turned to look at the sky outside the window. "Hold on to her, and don't let go. You may end up regretting it for the rest of your life…"

"What brought this on gramps? You gonna destroy the world or something?"

The man slowly stood up from the table. "No… Just change it. Take care, young Tachibana."

Kouta took another sip of tea and gave the orange mask a suspicious glare.

"Likewise, gramps."

With that, the man headed toward the exit, as he was passing the bar, he flipped a coin to the bartender and walked out the door. Kouta noticed that he had a slight limp on his right side, which gave him a lopsided gait; on top of that, he walked without a sense of purpose.

Kouta found this confusing, seeing as the masked man seemed to have no shortage of conviction based on the way he carried himself.

The Tachibana raised his cup of tea and tried to delude himself into believing that it was sake for a moment.

"Here's to us never crossing paths again, gramps. Guys like you are always bad news."

He downed his tea in one gulp and looked out the window.

"Konoha, here I come."

* * *

Naruto, Sakura, Shikamaru, Mitsuki, Kakashi, and Temari were standing in the plaza with their backpacks and the rest of their travel gear. Since they were rested up and also didn't have to worry about saving their energy in case they got into a fight, they could probably make it back to Konoha within a couple of hours.

Mitsuki was sitting on the fountain next to Naruto, she had a sort of spacey look on her face, while she held a cold compress to the side of her head, they appeared to be chatting about something. Sakura was staring at Naruto intently, intently enough to pique Kakashi's interest.

"Did you two talk yet?"

Sakura snapped out of her stare and looked at the jonin. "We did… though it wasn't about what you're thinking."

"So you two've got matters more pressing than this one?"

Sakura adjusted her headband while she replied. "Sort of… It was about the day we completed our mission in wave country… Haku is back, and she's under Orochimaru's control."

Kakashi grabbed his chin. "I see. How's he holding up?"

Sakura looked toward Naruto, visibly worried. "If you'd asked me that three years ago when we first became a team, I'd say he was fine… But thinking back to when we spoke on Tazuna's roof, I get the feeling he's trying to keep up a brave face for everyone."

"That's Naruto for you. Keep an eye on him these next few days… I may have to... leave for a while after we get back to Konoha. If anything goes wrong with his seal, tell Tsunade immediately."

Sakura gave her sensei an inquisitive look. "What? Are you leaving now?"

Kakashi nodded. "Yeah. I came up on some important intel concerning Sasuke's brother as well as the Akatsuki. Hokage-sama should see this ASAP, and I don't want to risk sending it by carrier pigeon, it might get intercepted."

Sakura nodded. "Oh. Well, I hope you're back soon; we haven't really done anything as a team since Naruto came back... Are you sure you wanna travel solo?"

Kakashi turned and prepared to jump away. "I move faster on my own anyway… Maybe I'll treat the two of you to barbecue next time I see you, later."

The jonin offered a peace sign and blasted off through the gate, his silhouette gradually disappeared from view as the desert and heat distortion took over his retreating shape. After a few seconds, Sakura decided to walk over to the fountain and check up on both Naruto and Mitsuki's conditions.

Shikamaru and Temari stood in front of a vendor cart, looking at what he had on sale.

Temari grabbed Shikamaru's hand to pull his attention from the collection of dried fruit.

"You gonna be stopping by anytime soon?"

Shikamaru shrugged. "I'm not sure. I've gotta get back and debrief, then, I've gotta organize an official "welcome back" function for blondie over there… _mataku."_

Temari smirked. "So, I'm guessing it'll be a while then… Hmmmm. Well, I guess we can't see each other anymore."

Shikamaru gave her a blank stare. "… I can never tell if you're messing with me or not."

The girl flicked his ponytail. "I'm joking, I've been trying to drop hints for the past few months and you **just now** put it all together. I'm not letting you get away now!"

Shikamaru smirked, handing some cash over to the merchant, in exchange, he recieved a bag of dried fruit.

Shikamaru popped some into his mouth. "It's your call in the end, once I have a bit of free time, I'm up for anything."

Temari took a dried pineapple from the bag. "Well then, I suppose I'll leave you to your work… for now."

Shikamaru stretched his arms upward. "Yeah, well… don't be a stranger."

"That's what **I'm** supposed to say… Mr. Sunshine."

It was here that the group came together to begin traveling, Temari began to turn tu leave until a swirl of sand appeared in front of the team. Seconds later, Gaara, Kankuro, and Chiyo appeared in front of them.

The group converged on the newcomers and Naruto was the first to speak.

"Gaara-chan! I never got to say goodbye, thanks for coming to see me off."

Gaara raised a finger to speak, but appeared to hesitate, she instead just hugged Naruto.

Naruto smiled and hugged her back. "I'll miss you too Gaara-chan."

"… No, you won't."

Naruto, Sakura, Shikamaru, and Mitsuki gave each other confused looks concerning Gaara-chan's reply.

Naruto let out a nervous chuckle. "Gaara-chan, I... don't understand."

Chiyo and Kankuro were both smirking, the old lady spoke up first. "The young Kazekage has been trapped in the tower working for the past two years, and, as such…"

Kankuro continued. "Old Lady Chiyo pulled a couple of strings with the Suna council and well…"

Gaara looked up at her fellow jinchuuriki, and despite her blank expression, she gave of an aura of contentment.

"... Naruto, I'm going back to Konoha with you."

~FIN~

* * *

If you can't figure out who Kouta was talking to, either I'm a terrible writer, or you don't watch Naruto. On top of that, I've decided to allow Gaara to return to Konoha with Naruto instead of having her be a recurring character.

Anyway, don't forget **PROLOGUE ORANGE IS OUT. **Go check it out if you can't get enough, and also, check out my profile for a new poll. I've decided to leave the release pattern to you guys.

Do you want:

2 chapters of Flash and 1 chapter of prologue?

3 chapters of Flash and 1 chapter of prologue?

Or a random release schedule?

VOTE NOW at the top of my profile page.


	37. Chapter 37: A Day With Tsunade

AN: I'm gonna try something a bit different this time around… I'm gonna have an entire chapter take place in one room. Sure, it doesn't sound like much, but if you've made it this far, you've probably noticed that I like to jump around to what other characters are doing instead of sticking to one character's shoulder the entire time. However, this chapter is the perfect time to try my hand at staying in one place, seeing as everyone needs to reconvene anyway so the story can progress.

* * *

Tsunade had her feet propped up on the windowsill while she watched the sunset, it was well past 5, and she should have been home by now, but today was a special occaision. She turned back to look at the gourd full of money beneath her desk, the current result of Naruto's betting pool.

She chuckled to herself and took a sip of green tea, yes, actual tea. Today wasn't really the day to be getting hammered; Tsunade had plans for the afternoon, all of which began directly after she debriefed Naruto.

A knock on the door broke Tsunade from her thoughts, so she spun her chair around to face the door.

"Come in."

A tuft of silver hair slowly peered into the room.

"Hokage-sama, I've got some important news for you… It'd be best if we were alone."

The Hokage got up from her desk and closed all of the shutters in the room while Kakashi shut the door. She did a few handsigns and some seals appeared on the shutters and the door, they glowed blue for a moment before disappearing.

Tsunade gave Kakashi a serious stare. "Debrief."

Kakashi looked to his pouch and produced a scroll; he then flipped it to Tsunade.

"As you know, the mission went over relatively smoothly, no fatalities... However, Deidara and Sasori weren't the only Akatsuki members in the area. We ran into Itachi and his partner, Kisame. The former… he gave me that scroll, I've checked it for traps and the like, so there's nothing to worry about there, it apparently contains the deployment plans for the Akatsuki's agents until the end of the summer."

Tsunade nodded and stared at the scroll intently, she was about to turn around and walk around to her desk again and sit down, but Kakashi interrupted her.

"That's… not all he said, Hokage-sama."

Tsunade raised her eyebrow and turned to the Jonin.

"Itachi… is he one of your agents?"

Tsunade sighed. "Technically, yes. When a Hokage dies or retires, all of his assets, including agents, are passed to his successor. I became Itachi's handler when I took office."

Kakashi nodded. "… Itachi told me some disconcerting information about Danzo Shimura. His time on this earth is limited; and he said that when he eventually passes, I need to start watching my back. According to your agent, Danzo wants my… the Sharingan for some reason… "

Tsunade frowned. "Itachi warned me about him a while back, but this is new information. I'll increase my surveillance on him… and as for you Kakashi-kun, I'm placing you under protective watch from now on… Is there any way for Itachi to notify you of his demise?"

Kakashi grabbed his chin. "Not sure… all he told me was _**'be weary of red-eyed crows'**_… I'll be looking for something of that nature, but until then, I'm unsure."

Kakashi sighed and turned to leave. "That's all I've got for you, Hokage-sama. Sakura should have the… relatively speaking; mundane parts of my mission report with her. They're probably no more than an hour behind me, so they should be here soon."

Tsunade nodded. "Noted, stay sharp… and Kakashi?"

"Hn?"

Tsunade locked her fingers together. "Is there anyone in ANBU that you can trust? I don't know who exactly Danzo has a hold on."

"Yeah… his call-sign was "Tenzo" when I served with him, he shouldn't be that hard for you to find… and please, don't put Yugao-chan on my detail. I don't want her to get mixed up in all this."

Tsunade nodded. "You have my word, Kakashi. Stay safe."

"No promises, Hokage-sama."

With that, the man disappeared in a cloud of white smoke.

Tsunade glared at the scroll and opened it, and as Kakashi said, it contained a map of the known world with the deployment schemes highlighted in red ink. The Hokage jotted down a few notes on her wrist and re-sealed the scroll, electing to give it to Jiraiya once he came back. She then deactivated the office's privacy seals with another quick sequence of hand signs.

It was here that Shizune swung the door open and plopped another stack of paper onto the Hokage's desk.

"These are some building expenses that I need to go through wi-… Tsunade-sama?"

Shizune noticed the blank space where the blonde woman usually sat the desk and turned to het mentor. Tsunade, obviously not listening, had silently gone over to her portrait on the wall and spun it around, revealing the current bet totals.

Shizune's curiosity got the better of her in the moment. "Any new developments?"

Tsunade chuckled a bit. "The stash is beneath the desk… we may have to move it to the bank pretty soon, it's broken 500,000 ryo."

Shizune sputtered. "500,000?!"

Tsunade nodded. "The families of the people who work in this tower wanted in as well, it basically quadrupled the pot overnight."

Shizune got a coy look on her face. "So, I've been meaning to ask Tsunade-sama… who are you planning to bet on?"

Tsunade sighed; she had a tiny smile on her face. "Contrary to my recent actions concerning the arrangement with Sunagakure… I want Sakura to win… Maybe it's just an old woman living vicariously through her protégé… She and Naruto remind me of Jiraiya and myself when we were younger, though I'll admit their relationship is a lot healthier. I just hope she doesn't make the same mistake I did…"

Shizune gasped. "You didn't put any money down on her, did you?!"

Tsunade turned and raised an eyebrow. "Of course not! Whomever I bet on is done for!"

Shizune released a sigh. "That's goo- … **_No_**! You're not getting me again! You've got to get these looked over and signed by the end of the week!"

Tsunade strolled over to the window, continuing to ignore Shizune, she leaned against the windowsill and sighed.

"Sorry, I've just been thinking about everything that's been going on lately, and it's starting to really bother me. Shizune-chan? I know that my position as Hokage involves a degree of detachment, but as a medical specialist, I've developed personal relationships with most of the ninja I'll inevitably end up sending to their deaths. Only now am I finally beginning to realize it… _what if Jiraiya doesn't come back? I've already lost so many of my loved ones, sometimes I wonder why I even bother..._"

Shizune's eyes widened a bit and she placed Tsunade's pen back on her desk instead of trying to hand it to her.

She also approached the window, placing her hand on her master's shoulder.

"Tsunade-sama, I believe that all of us would give our lives for Konoha if the need arose, we knew what we were getting into when we chose to become shinobi. The ninja of Konoha trust that someone in your position can make the decisions that need to be made... We believe in you, and as long as we do, we'll know that our sacrifices serve a greater good that we may or may not be able to see."

Tsunade exhaled, after a moment, she turned to her former apprentice and smiled. "… You're not usually this profound, Shizune-chan, maybe you should take up philosophy or something?"

Shizune groaned. "... Maybe after I find a steady boyfriend."

Tsunade smirked at the sunset. "It's not all it's cracked up to be… kinda stressful actually. No bigger aspirations than starting a family?"

Shizune crossed her arms and chuckled. "I'm the Head Administrator of Konoha Hospital, as well as the personal attendant to the Hokage… Yeah, I think I'm **good** in the achievements department… I wanna settle down before I end up regretting it."

Tsunade took a sip from a the cup she had placed on the windowsill earlier that afternoon.

"Just making sure…"

"Tsunade-sama, are you drinking on the job again? We just talked about this."

"… It's tea… I swear."

Shizune frowned at her teacher. "… Sure, whatever you say."

Suddenly, there was a loud beeping sound on the intercom.

'_Hokage-sama. You've got visitors."_

Tsunade walked over to her desk and plopped down in her seat, she pressed a button on the telephone then lowered her head to speak into the receiver.

"Who are they? I've got an S-Rank debrief coming in pretty soon."

'_Well, we've got the Kazekage… We've also got Sakura here, and Naruto as well. Then there's-'_

Tsunade's eyes bulged in confusion as she interrupted. "The… Kazekage? … Send them up. Hm, they're back a lot earlier than I thought..."

Tsunade cut the intercom and leaned back in her chair, staring at the ceiling, she made a noise, one that denoted exasperation.

Shizune raised her eyebrow. "… What noise was that? Aren't you happy that the mission went over without a hitch?"

"Yeah… It's just, this is the last bit of peace and quiet I'll be getting for the next few weeks…"

"Why's that, Tsunade-sama?"

"… Can't you hear them arguing?"

Shizune paused and closed her eyes to listen, she began to smile at the faint sound of Sakura yelling, with the word 'Naruto' interspersed here and there.

"But the debrief won't be all _**that**_ long, will it?"

Tsunade nodded. "I'm gonna be working a bit late tonight… there's more than one debrief that I need to get around to… All of which involve Naruto's fanclub in some capacity… And well… You know that Yumi's back in town, right?"

Shizune grinned. "Yeah! We ran into each other earlier today, she hasn't aged a day since I was a kid!"

Tsunade at first spoke loudly, but the second half of her thoughts she chose to mutter beneath her breath. "Don't remind me._ I still haven't figured out her secret… Wouldn't need this stupid genjutsu if I did."_

Shizune refocused the conversation. "Where was this going again?"

"Right… Yumi's here, and Kouta will be here soon… She hasn't seen him since he ran away that night... It's been five years, and she's a bit arrow-happy as of late."

Shizune's eyes widened. "… Oh… Oh dear… She's gonna kill him… How's Mitsuki taking it?"

Tsunade motioned toward the door. "We'll find out soon enough…"

Shizune nodded. "I'll leave you to it then… but I'll be back, we're going through that paperwork whether you want to or not... And you may want to order a repair crew in advance for Naruto's house, you know, just in case."

The woman disappeared in a puff of smoke, leaving Tsunade to greet her returning Shinobi. The instant Shizune left, the door swung open; revealing a very angry looking Sakura with Naruto in a headlock, a worried Kazekage, a bored Shikamaru, and a visibly sick Mitsuki.

"Sakura-chan! I'm fine, I swear!"

Sakura tightened her squeeze for a moment, making Naruto grunt. "I told you NOT TO USE THAT JUTSU UNTIL YOU HAD A FORMAL EXAMINATION!"

Tsunade raised an eyebrow at her apprentice and looked toward the Kazekage. "I'm glad you're okay, Gaara-chan."

Gaara nodded. "… Me too."

Tsunade looked at Sakura and Naruto. "What's going on with you two love-birds? You're back earlier than I expected."

Sakura immediately let go of Naruto and blushed. "Tsu-Tsunade-sensei! He... um-"

Naruto grinned and jumped in on the explanation. "So! I made my own version of the Hiraishin… It uses the fox's cha-"

Tsunade gave Naruto a strange look as she cut him off. "We're in mixed company, Naruto. You shouldn't talk about your… _condition_ so openly."

"It's fine Obaa-chan, anyone with half a brain has it figured out at this point… but anyway; overusing it has some _**naaaasty**_ side effects! … I think I damaged my chakra coils!"

Tsunade frowned. "That's not something to be taken lightly, Naruto-kun. Ninja who do that are usually forced to retire… Naruto?"

"Yeah?"

"What's up with your features? … Your eyes especially."

Naruto rubbed the back of his neck and slumped over in exhasperation. "Yeah… Um, my chakra coils aren't the _only_ things acting up…"

Tsunade stood up and walked around the desk, she looked up at Naruto pinching and examining various sections of his face.

The Hokage spoke in a hushed tone. "Have you been feeling any pain in your spinal column in the last few hours? You should be rolling around screaming."

Naruto shrugged. "That's just it! Earlier today, it was painful to even walk on walls, now I feel even stronger than ever! I even managed to teleport us all the way back! … Which is why Sakura-chan is mad at me."

Sakura stepped over and added her own opinion to the mix.

"He had internal hemorrhaging and bruising, but it's almost all gone. Even so, I didn't wanna take any chances until someone with more expertise takes a good look at him."

Tsunade looked at Sakura in surprise and glared at Naruto.

"Naruto. You are _**barred**_ from using the "_Hiriashin No Naruto"_ or whatever the hell you're calling it, from now on! That should be considered an S-Rank Kinjutsu for what it did to you!"

Naruto spoke under his breath. "_Kitsune Kaminari. _B-but I feel fine now..."

Tsunade was the only one who heard him, so she pinched Naruto's ear and yanked him down to her height. "I don't care how tough you are! The human body isn't supposed to conduct that much demonic chakra in such a short amount of time!"

Naruto stared at the ground, waiting for the Hokage to continue.

"Alright then…" The Hokage took a deep breath and paused to think for a moment.

"After we debrief, Naruto, I want you to go to the Hospital, Shizune can take a look at you, and if anything is outside of her expertise, I'll handle your treatment personally… However, I think Jiraiya's the one you need to examine you. Shikamaru… since Kakashi has other business to attend to, you can authorize the release of the team's payment for the mission. Girls… you all stay after, we've got a bit discussing to do."

Naruto nodded and grinned, he then disappeared in a flash of orange light. Sakura's eyes widened at first in shock, but then descended into anger, her teeth began to grind together while Tsunade face-palmed. Mitsuki began to chuckle to herself as she watched the two medic-nin display their frustration.

Tsunade looked toward the former-ANBU; "Dammit, Naruto… I'll get a report from him later… Mitsuki-chan, any complications with your head injury?"

Mitsuki shook her head. "I was a little loopy for a while, but nothing out of the ordinary happened."

The Hokage smirked and raised an eyebrow. "I'm going to have to retire you if you keep getting hit in the head. Before long you'll be chair-bound and drinking your meals through a straw."

Mitsuki plopped down on the couch and shut her eyes. "I'm sure you can wake me up if I ever go comatose again, Hokage-sama."

"… Let's not take any chances with that, your mother would shoot me."

Mitsuki groaned. "I'd rather not think about how I'm gonna deal with that for the time being."

It was here that Shikamaru piped in. "I'll be headin' out then, I'd rather not get caught up in your girl talk, or whatever it is you all plan on doing."

Shikamaru vanished in a puff of smoke, leaving the four women in the room.

Tsunade's eyes swiveled back to Gaara, who during the exchange had taken the liberty of removing Tsunade's photo from the wall. She was examining the betting pool on the back of the portrait.

Tsunade grinned at the Kazekage, and waltzed over. "I've been meaning to ask Gaara, to what do I owe this visit of yours?"

Gaara-chan gave Tsunade a blank stare. "I'm here on an extended vacation… I've decided I'll be living with Naruto until further notice."

Tsunade sputtered for a moment since this was news to her. After regaining her composure, she smirked and swiveled her eyes toward Sakura, for whom this was also the first time hearing this information. The girl was as pale as a ghost and completely frozen in place, Mitsuki on the other hand appeared slightly miffed, probably due to the impending comission of a sand-cleaning detail, as well as her rapidly approaching "family reunion".

Sakura produced a small stack of papers from her backpack and handed them to Tsunade.

"Tsunade-sensei, these are our mission reports; Naruto's is a bit… brief, but I'm sure he can give you all the details of what happened on his end."

Tsunade walked back to her desk and sat in her chair, looking Sakura and Mitsuki in the eye.

"Alright you two, shoot."

Sakura spoke plainly. "Well, this was a rather eventful mission to put it simply. We managed to defeat Sasori of the Akatsuki… with the help of Sasuke Uchiha."

Tsunade raised an eyebrow. "Sasuke's still alive then?"

Sakura gave Tsunade a weak nod. "He… wasn't all that happy to see us… After we defeated Sasori, Sasuke ripped a strange-looking capsule out of the puppet's body. If he's still affiliated with Orochimaru, there's no telling what he has planned."

Tsunade nodded. "I'd actually like to hear more about what happened on the way there, I hear you all ran into trouble."

Sakura sighed. "Naruto's past is coming back to haunt him… You probably don't know much about our first real mission."

Tsunade locked her fingers in front of her face. "No, enlighten me."

Sakura felt her stomach turn as she thought back. "I'm an outsider to this story, even though I was there, Naruto would be able to give you more, but… When we were genin, our first real mission was a C-Rank escort to a small fishing village near Kiri… It was listed at C-Rank, but Kakashi-sensei designated it an A-Rank mission when we were ambushed by a pair of chuunin, it didn't get any easier from then onward."

Sakura crossed her arms beneath her chest and stared at a lamp on Tsunade's desk.

"We had to protect a bridge builder from any would-be-assassins while he attempted to complete work on the Great Naruto Bridge… These assassins ranged in skill from chuunin, to S-Rank nukenin, the S-Rank in question being Zabuza No Kiri. That man had an apprentice, her name was Haku, and Naruto ended up forming a close relationship with her, a relationship that he avoids talking about in detail, even to me… Niether Zabuza, nor Haku managed to survive the chaos that enveloped the village after their employer turned on them, and even though the mission was successful, Naruto never really got over it…"

Sakura gave a weak smile. "You met him several months afterward, so you probably can't tell, but he's never been the same… He's not as… _vibrant_ as he used to be, as hard as that is to believe."

Tsunade took the information in and refocused the conversation. "So, how does this relate back to the mission, Sakura?"

Sakura shuddered. "Orochimaru's done _**it**_ again… He took Haku's body and used the Edo Tensei on it… She's back, and not in a good way… Naruto had to fight her again."

Tsunade's eyes widened and she covered her mouth with her hands. "Gods… he seemed so energetic… but now that I think about it, you can never really tell with him, can you?"

Sakura shook her head. "No, you can't, and that's what worries me."

The Hokage took a drag of her tea and leaned back in her seat. "I'll have to get the details from him later. As for-"

Tsunade cut herself of when she saw the clock; it was nearly 6:30, she sighed and smirked at Sakura.

"We can continue this conversation afterward. Sorry to cut you off… but we have a meeting."

Mitsuki spoke from her spot on the couch. "With who?"

Tsunade's smile disappeared and turned into a frown. "Ah, dammit."

Sakura raised her eyebrow. "What?"

Tsunade slouched down in her chair. "I forgot to reinforce the windows…"

Sakura scratched her head, while Mitsuki seemed to know exactly what was going to happen next.

The raven-haired kunoichi groaned. "Oh, _here__ we go."_

The instant Mitsuki finished her sentence, the window shattered, and a tan trench coat came somersaulting into the room.

Anko landed on the couch next to Mitsuki and gave the Hokage an earnest look of anticipation.

Tsunade just glared back.

Anko suddenly spoke up. "You couldn't have mentioned whatever this is when we met earlier today?"

The blonde rolled her eyes. "That was a private meeting, _this_is a special occasion."

Anko crossed her legs. "So, what're we waiting for?"

Mitsuki sat up and stretched. "Everyone else."

Just then, Hinata and Hanabi walked into the office, they both bowed toward Tsunade before looking around the room.

Hinata appeared visibly worried. "Hokage-sama, might I ask the purpose of this meeting?"

Tsunade motioned for Hinata to wait. "In due time, we're still waiting on one more guest."

Hanabi looked around, making sure to glare at each one of the girls before locking eyes with Gaara. The temperature in the room seemed to drop as the two girls gave each other emotionless glares, upon close examination, one could see arcs of electricity bridge the space between their eyes.

Hanabi glared at the Kazekage. "You will be a most formidable rival, I am unsure as to why I sense this feeling to be true, but it matters little."

Gaara's sand seemed to quiver and twitch with anticipation. "… Likewise, small girl."

Tsunade called over to the two girls. "Let's bring it down a notch, I already have a _window _to fix."

There was a short, yet tense silence until some platinum-blonde hair slowly poked through the shattered window.

Ino's gave the room the once-over, and if one looked hard enough, one could sense the spinning gears inside the blonde's head. Ino's inquisitive expression slowly formed a pout once she realized who exactly was in her company at the moment, she gave an exhasperated sigh before fully stepping through the window.

Tsunade motioned for Ino to join the group of women on the opposite end of the room. The teen complied and stood next to Sakura, Tsunade immediately began speaking.

"So, as most of you know… some more than others… Naruto has become quite the catch recently. Understatements aside, I'd like to direct your attention to the Kazekage, show them the tally, Gaara-chan."

The women all looked at Gaara, who had turned the picture around to reveal the betting pool.

There were varying displays of emotion, though Anko's was the most outwardly colorful.

The Snake Mistress grinned and began to laugh as the payout of the betting pool was heavily skewed in her favor by a wide margin.

Sakura's eye twitched in annoyance, she shrieked despite herself being favorably ranked at #2 out of 7.

"Tsunade-sensei! You turned all this into another opportunity to gamble?! … _**You didn't put any money on me did you?**"_

Tsunade shook her head. "No. I'm no fool. The reason I'm showing you all this is to put this fiasco in perspective… There are seven of you. _**Seven**_… Now, the good news is, I'm barring Naruto from taking any missions until further notice due to some outstanding medical concerns, which means he'll have plenty of spare time in these coming months."

There was a break in Tsunade's words, prefaced by a sip of her _tea._

"Now, as far as the betting pool goes, it's gotten a bit… _ridiculous_."

Tsunade lifted the gourd of money onto the desk; it made a hearty '_thunk' _when it hit the mahogany desk.

The Hokage was about to speak again, but was cut off by Hanabi. "I've counted it and at the moment it adds up to f-"

Her voice reverberated across the room. _"Five-Hundred-Thousand Ryo."_

The little girl maintained a blank expression as the room's attention shifted to her, she briefly looked around at the strange expressions directed at her and flushed, and she looked down at her hands and spoke very quietly, apparently she felt the need to explain herself.

"_Well… A-according to the apparent volume of the gourd as well as the timbre of the sound it made upon impact with Tsunade-sama's desk. 500,000 … Roughly… I... I would need to count it manually to be certain."_

Tsunade gave the young girl a strange stare. "… No… That's right… also impressive... 500,000… _Okay then_… Sorry where was I?"

Anko smirked and spoke loud enough for the room to hear. "You were on the part about where the "investors" put all their money on me. I mean, I AM the only one who's… _connected_ with him..."

The woman punctuated her boast by performing an obscene gesture with her hands. Ino groaned and rolled her eyes, Sakura pouted a bit, but seemed relatively calm, and the same could be said for Hanabi as well.

Mitsuki's eyes flared up a bit and she began to play with her hair, pretending not to pay much attention, while Hinata turned beet red and clenched her fists. Gaara merely stared for a moment, before turning to the Hokage, waiting for her to continue.

Anko picked up on this gave the Kazekage a coy look. "I get the feeling you know something that we don't, Kazekage-sama."

Gaara-chan stared at Anko for a moment before crossing her arms and turning her attention to one of the tassels on her belt.

"Sex with Naruto… I take it you assume that you're the only one who's accomplished as much... **_Don't_**."

All of the other women in the room aside from Sakura (who just grinded her teeth together as she thought back to her sleepless night in the adjacent room) did a double take and stared incredulously at both Gaara-chan, as well as each other.

Anko raised an eyebrow at the Kazekage for a moment, she then pouted and shook her head. "You cheeky devil."

Tsunade sharply inhaled with a smile adorning her face, almost as if she were trying to hold in a laugh. There was a nearly silent sort of energy bouncing around in the room, the Hokage could feel the tension building, so she opted to move things along.

"As I was saying… This betting pool is getting out of hand… Yesterday, I was discreetly notified by my agents that news of this little wager is beginning to spread, and that the entire village could know within a month. In light of that, I'd like for you all to keep this under wraps, and by wraps, I mean, _**don't tell Naruto**_. He's got enough on his plate, and well… This is the last thing he needs right now."

There were hushed murmurs echoing throughout the office as soon as the Hokage finished speaking. Tsunade allowed the energy to decrease a little before she returned to her speech.

"… I've been doing some thinking about what to do with the money once one of you snags Naruto... In case you were wondering, there will be no form of reward for the 'winner' of this competition. Naruto's gonna find out about this eventually, and I'd rather not have to see one of you try to explain how you did this for **_him_** and not the ridiculous cash pot."

Ino place her hands on her hips and raised her eyebrows. "Then… why are you telling us this, Hokage-sama?"

Tsunade elaborated. "Because, I _**do **_plan on setting aside enough money to pay for your wedding and your honeymoon... whenever that may be… I believe one of you should benefit from this in _some_ way, it's only fair, seeing as we're making money off of your emotional distress."

More murmurs filled the room until Hinata of all people spoke up. "Hokage-sama, might I ask about Naruto's condition? Will he be too sick for us to see him anytime soon?"

Tsunade gave an audible sigh. "To be honest, I'm not sure... assuming a shiny object somewhere hasn't distracted Naruto, Shizune should be examining him as we speak. She'll summon for me if she finds something outside her expertise, so until then, we'll have to wait. Any more questions?"

Mitsuki's hand slowly rose toward the ceiling. "I-It... concerns my mother… She doesn't know about… _**me**_… does she?"

Tsunade appeared genuinely worried when she replied. "Mitsuki-chan, will she not approve of you and Naruto being closer? … No, I haven't told her anything about the betting pool yet, nor have I mentioned anything concerning your interest in Naruto… if that's what you're asking…"

Mitsuki exhaled in relief and her body de-tensed from anticitpation. However... shortly after this exchange, there was a sudden chill in the room, everyone froze and looked in the direction the feeling was coming from... **It was Hanabi**, she was staring directly at Mitsuki with a nefarious smirk on her face, it made everyone in the room shudder. Mitsuki broke into a cold sweat, realizing her mistake by mentioning such pertinent information in the presence of Hanabi Hyuga of all people.

Mitsuki's eyes lit up like green laser pointers and she instantly crossed the room, kneeling so that she was eye to eye with the young girl.

"Something I should know about, Princess?"

Hanabi's smirk remained. "Merely keep your distance from Uzumaki-san... and we'll have nothing to discuss."

The Hokage tapped her desk with her finger, it made a sound loud enough to snap everyone out of the intense standoff. Her voice was firm and powerful. "Hanabi, Mitsuki. Save it for later!"

She looked around the room, raising an eyebrow at the young women, awaiting any more outbursts. After an acceptable bout of silence, she once again refocused the conversation back to the meeting.

"Alright then, in closing, I'm going to respectfully ask you all to give Naruto some space for the next 24 hours, or at least until we can finish our medical examinations… Sakura, you've lucked out as far as that goes, seeing as we'll need your assistance with a few medical procedures, stay here. The rest of you are dismissed."

The rest of the girls slowly filed out of the office, with Ino sticking her tongue out at the medic as she left. A few moments afterward Sakura was the sole remaining girl in the room aside from the Hokage. The pinkette made a angry face at the Hokage and crossed her arms, if one looked close enough, one could see the steam coming off of Sakura's body.

Tsunade just smirked and leaned back in her chair.

The apprentice finally spoke after a tense silence. "Tsunade-sensei… why are you doing this to me?"

"Doing what, Sakura-chan?" The Hokage's smirk increased in its smugness.

"I had a plan concerning this mess, and as soon as it starts to come together, you throw a wrench in it by bringing Gaara into the fold! And now this?!"

The older woman took another sip of her tea. "So you say you have a plan to truly capture Naruto's affections?"

"I-… That's not what I mean!"

"… Then what do you mean, Sakura? From what I've gathered, your reunion with Sasuke didn't go as planned, and he was less than happy to see either of you."

Sakura took a deep breath. "I… Don't know anymore. I tried talking to Naruto-kun before we came back, but the words just wouldn't come out of my mouth, I ended up deflecting and we haven't gotten any farther."

Tsunade nodded and threw in her own 2 cents. "I know more than anyone what you're dealing with right now. However, you have to be able to look at the bigger picture sometimes, letting this pass you by may be the biggest mistake you'll ever make. I can tell that you still have something there for Sasuke, but you have to understand that he's taken a path that you can't follow."

The Hokage showed Sakura a picture of her genin team under Sarutobi.

"Sakura, dear… There's a reason he didn't let you come with him back then, I found myself in a similar position when Orochimaru began to stray from us, and it's disturbingly parallel to your situation, at least from what you've told me. Now, I'm not going to tell you to just discard any sort of feelings, and I'm not going to tell you to jump into something you're unsure of… However, when all of the people around you can see it, maybe you should take a step back and examine things objectively. The will of the heart can be clouded by the mind, and vice-versa. You're at a crossroads right now, and you need to figure out which path to take."

"_My head, or my heart_… Tsunade-sensei… I'm unsure as to which path is which... Is Sasuke in my mind, or in my heart? The same goes for Naruto-kun as well."

Tsunade walked around her desk and ushered Sakura out of the office and they began to walk down the stairs.

"Sakura, that's a question you can only answer on your own, but as you've likely heard many times before, you're on a bit of a punch-clock. Now come on, I think it's time we had a Q&amp;A, I'll cook."

"Th-thank you, Tsunade-sensei."

"Any time, my dear."

FIN

* * *

That's it for now, this chapter was more of a writing exercise for me, and despite the lack of progression, I felt that this needed to happen for plot reasons, this way, I'll be able to excuse some of the upcoming shenanigans I have planned.

If you haven't read it yet, the 1st chapter of Prologue Orange is out, and after chapter 38 drops, I'll be working on the next installment of the prequel, seeing as the majority of you prefer a 3:1 ratio at the time of writing this chapter. If you want a different ratio, head over to my profile and put down your vote in the poll. It should only take you like 10 seconds.

The votes are as follows:

3 Flash : 1 Prologue Ratio: _**11 Votes**_

2 Flash : 1 Prologue Ratio:_** 5 Votes**_

Random Release Schedule: _**4 Votes**_

Stay tuned in and make sure you vote if you feel like it should be a different ratio!

_Signin' Off_

~Breath of the Wiz


	38. Chapter 38: To Answer Your Question

What's up guys? As of recently, I've dubbed the following arc the "Staycation" arc, and for the most part, It'll expand the focus on a few girls who haven't gotten as much "screentime" both on their own and with Naruto as well. Simply put, Hanabi, Ino, Hinata, and Mitsuki to an extent, are in need of some more scenes with Naruto as of now (Mitsuki especially since her family will be in town very soon, hehehe :D ) That's not to say that the other girls will be non-existent during this arc (I'm trying to build everyone up equally for whenever the hell the "final decision" happens. Which will not happen soon, that's for sure), but they won't be focused on for the next few chapters.

_**UPDATE 8/21/16:**** I'VE JUST POSTED A VERY SPECIAL POLL ON MY PROFILE PAGE. TAKE A LOOK, VOTE, AND POTENTIALLY LOSE SOME OF YOUR HAIR DUE TO STRESS.**_

* * *

_Otogakure Village; Orochimaru's Laboratory:_

Orochimaru had always taken pride in his keen intellect, his inability to find any challenge too great for him to overcome… However, this "_Jashin" _that the captured Akatsuki member kept pleading and referring to continued to elude the snake Sannin.

The man growled as he flipped through a scroll containing recorded knowledge concerning ancient religions, and while he was elated to have found a few mentions of "Jashinism" in relevant material, he failed to find anything useful concerning it. The original clan that practiced the religion was wiped out, dismembered and scattered across the land hundreds of years ago. Any detailed information concerning them was sparse at best.

On top of that, it wasn't like he could interrogate Hidan, the man had some sort of superhuman pain tolerance, merely laughing when Orochimaru ordered Kabuto to carve his eyes out to get him to talk.

He slammed his desk as hard as he could in order to crush an errant fly that had been buzzing around for the past few minutes.

He angrily parsed through Hidan's medical examinations, which were inconclusive as well. The Sannin had run many a test, repeatedly removing and reattaching limbs, measuring healing efficiency and speed.

Orochimaru continued thumbing through his notes, he stopped on a circled passage concerning one of his many hypotheses regarding Hidan's insane vitality. It detailed the lack of cellular degeneration in Hidan's detached appendages, and the rapid healing upon reattachment. After running a few tests, he concluded that the man was somehow drawing chakra from an outside source to maintain his body, and that killing people using some sort of seal or ritual is what facilitated the process. He cursed, not even knowing where to begin if such a thing was true.

Said hypothesis was the only thing that made sense in the Sannin's mind, yet, he barely knew anything more than he did the day before.

The Snake stabbed a kunai into the desk out of frustration, cursing the immortal monster he'd captured. The last time Orochimaru tried to question him, Hidan had bitten off his own tongue, they'd resorted to holding his mouth open with a vice and stitching it back in just so he'd be able to talk.

Orochimaru groaned and pulled out another scroll concerning ancient religions until there was a knock on the door.

"Yes, what is it?"

Kabuto entered the room, carrying a tray of tofu-flavored food pills, he placed a few into a mug on his master's desk before speaking.

"Orochimaru-sama, the interrogation went as it usually goes. He bit out his tongue again, we've got medic-nin stitching it back in as we speak, however, I wouldn't come to you unless I had news."

Orochimaru grunted and swatted the mug off to the side, shattering it against the wall, the food pills bounced around the room. He growled and turned around, visibly annoyed.

"This had better be good…"

"Of course… I have an idea, sir. I believe Sasuke-san may be able to aid in our interrogation. While we don't have any Yamanaka shinobi in our midst, I believe the Sharingan may be useful in tricking him into revealing how he became immortal."

Orochimaru narrowed his eyes and spun his chair back around to his desk. He retrieved some dossiers he created on the Sharingan and rapidly flipped through the pages for a few seconds until he stopped on a page near the end of the file.

He read through it and his scowl contorted into a sickening grin. He handed the dossier to his aide and hashed out his orders.

"Kabuto-kun formulate a plan, and then summon the boy… _kukukuku…"_

* * *

_Konoha Hospital_

"Well, that's… strange…"

Shizune continued to shine her flashlight into Naruto's now slitted pupils. They'd dilate and contract as normal, but they also stubbornly retained their cat-like appearance.

Naruto maintained his blank expression while Shizune intently stared at the glowing seal on his stomach.

'Oi, Fox… You sure I'm gonna be alright?'

'_**Hn. Aside from being better looking, your body has become adapted to handle more of my chakra, just as I thought.'**_

'_Better… looking? What?! I look like a damn furry!'_

'_**I take offense to that term, human.'**_

'_Whatever, just don't screw this up anymore than you already have.'_

'_**You're aware that you've done this to yourself… right? This is one of the many failsafes built into your seal, if you push your limits, it will adapt your body to handle more demonic chakra so that you may remain in control.'**_

'… _Control?'_

'_**Of course. Your survival may be in our best interest, however, I WILL steal your body if you screw up, I guarantee it… though that has become more difficult as of late.'**_

'_I've been wondering about that, from day one, we've been taught you can't actually __**kill**__ Bijuu. What happens to you if I get killed?_

'_**Many things could potentially happen. I would have to observe your seal more closely to be entirely sure as far as us specifically, however, a poorly sealed Bijuu will escape simply re-materialize in the place that the host body expires. You and I are in a different situation, your seal appears much more robust than the previous seals that have been used to contain me.'**_

_So… now what?'_

'_**Just allow the humans to do their inspections so you can be done with it. You have females to impregnate.'**_

'_Oh… shit! Why do I keep forgetting about that?!'_

'_**Because you're a moron… If you follow my lead, you'll come out on top… and I'll get to have sex again, that last one was a freebie, I'm starting to get bored in here.'**_

Shizune's voice snapped Naruto out of his inner exchange.

"Naruto, have you been experiencing any blank spaces in your memory? Time passing without your perceiving it?"

The blonde shook his head. "Not since the training trip before my seal stabilized. I'll let you all know if I blink and 5 hours have passed or something."

Shizune nodded and then replied; "I'm going to set up an appointment for you tomorrow then. Tsunade-sama will need time to prepare for you… however, I'm starting to think Jiraiya-sama would be the best one to examine you."

"When's the appointment?"

"Tomorrow at 9:00 sharp, don't be late, Naruto."

Naruto nodded and hopped off of the examining table, he threw on his black shirt and made sure to go somewhere private before teleporting to his front door. He stood there in front of his spacious mansion for a moment and began to feel a familiar chill run down his spinal column. Naruto took it as a bad omen and decided that it would probably be better for him to come back later. The boy paused and wondered where else he would go that wouldn't attract any unwanted attention. Seeing as the sun had just gone down, his options weren't exactly very diverse.

He couldn't go to Ichiraku… at least not without a date, seeing as women had started staking the place out for when he'd show up, and the Black Lotus was out of the question since it was a weekend, the place would be packed, that, and the fact that Naruto was still hurting from Tsunade's salary deduction for breaking her desk.

There was a moment where Naruto's mind went blank, and then, it was as if a light had flipped on inside of his head.

He'd nearly forgotten with everything that had happened up until this point, but it was perfect. Thinking back to the day on which he'd met Mitsuki, he remembered that he chose to keep his old apartment for no particular reason.

Naruto turned around from his door and jumped off into the night sky toward his old residence, a few seconds later, the door creaked open, and her eyes darted around.

"Naruto? Lady Tachibana would li-… You were wrong, Shukaku."

The girl mentally chastised her inner demon for the false alarm concerning the Kyuubi's proximity before slipping back inside of the doorway.

* * *

"Finally."

Sasuke, after a bit of bargaining, had gotten Orochimaru to hand over the Snake Contract, he'd spent the day in the Sannin's library reading up on the previous users of the scroll, with Orochimaru preceding him directly. He was now ready to sign it, he had the hefty paper unfurled across the living room floor of his spacious apartment.

Sasuke was sitting cross-legged on the floor with a kunai and some bandages, he dragged the sharp steel across the tip of his left ring finger and began to fill his name into the blank space next to Orochimaru's. When he put the final characters in his signature for the snake contract, he picked up the roll of bandages next to his knee and began to tie them around his profusely bleeding digit.

"Dammit."

Just then, there was a knock on Sasuke's apartment door; he'd figured it was Kabuto or something. The Uchiha boy knew how to get information from people using genjutsu, and he figured it was only a matter of time until Orochimaru or Kabuto remembered so as well. Sasuke figured they'd eventually summon him so that he could get some pertinent information from the immortal prisoner.

He groaned and stood up, slowly walking over to the door. He was met with a preferable alternative to Kabuto's smug visage.

"Hey there, Sasuke!"

Sasuke exhaled in relief, or... annoyance? It was always hard to tell with him... He moved to the side, allowing the girl room to enter the apartment. She was carrying a large brown bag and placed it on the counter, she was about to begin removing the contents when she saw Sasuke's blood dripping from his finger at a rapid pace.

She walked around the counter and stuck her hand out. "Cut yourself? Gimme your hand."

Sasuke gave her a blank stare for a couple of seconds before complying. "I cut too deep when I was signing the snake contract. It's bleeding… a lot."

Karin frowned after giving the boy's hand a quick inspection. "Sasuke? You nearly went down to the _bone_, that's some serious pain tolerance… You didn't disinfect it _at all _before you wrapped it did you?"

He merely shook his head, prompting Karin to usher him to the couch. They sat down and she produced a small first aid kit from her sleeve, she pulled out two tiny vials, one was a clotting agent, the other was a disinfectant.

Sasuke silently handed her the roll of bandages while he removed the already blood-stained bandages from his finger.

Karin exhaled as she applied the disinfectant and then the clotting agent.

"I may be your personal physician, but you have to know how to keep yourself safe while I'm not around. Just because you put bandages on something doesn't mean it'll heal properly."

Sasuke turned to the window with a bored expression. "Sure, whatever."

Karin lowered her glasses and raised her eyebrow. "_Oh you don't __**have **__to_… at least until I have to amputate your hand due to infection, and then retire you early because you can't make hand signs anymore."

Sasuke turned to glare at the redhead, but she just smirked back. "Sasuke, you know that look doesn't work on me. I'm just looking out for you."

Sasuke's glare subsided and he turned back to the window for a moment before speaking.

"… Karin."

"Hm?"

"It's becoming too dangerous for me to stay here... I have to go soon."

"Wait, what?! _Really_?"

Sasuke nodded and turned to the girl. "Orochimaru… he's becoming weaker, more _erratic_... He's created some foul technique that forces his soul into the body of a living host. I've seen it with my own eyes, and my time here is running short, I don't plan on letting him doing that to me… _I still have so much to do_."

Karin appeared downtrodden when Sasuke turned back to her.

"… There's no other alternative."

The girl replied to him in a hushed tone, she was staring at he lap. "It's not that, I want to see you achieve your goals… it's just… Will I be able to say goodbye?"

The Uchiha flexed his newly bandaged hand. "… I'll be leaving within a week."

Karin became even more worried when she noticed a duffel bag in the corner of the room, Sasuke was serious. She could see that it was visibly stocked with provisions for a long journey. The redhead sighed before asking another question.

"… Where does that leave me, Sasuke?"

The Uchiha paused for a moment appearing to be deep in thought. There was a long pause, the only audible noise was the sound of Karin adjusting the bandages around Sasuke's ring finger. The girl began putting a few thoughts together during this silence, she wondered why _Sasuke_ of all people would be telling her this as opposed to just disappearing one night. She looked at the Uchiha, who was still staring out the window, there was a slight movement in his shoulders before he suddenly broke the silence.

"… It leaves you nowhere. Do what you want."

Karin's pout slowly turned into a warm smile. "Then... I'll be going _with_ you."

Sasuke looked down at his hand for a moment and then back at Karin.

"... Fine._"_

* * *

Opting not to teleport for once allowed Naruto to just take in the scenery of a night in Konoha. The paper lamps illuminated the streets below with soft golds, reds and oranges. He could the reflections of happy faces in the windows of shops and stores, there were merchants of all types, conversing amongst each other and trying to rip people off. Naruto smiled at the streets below, It was nice to be home, and with everyone here in Konoha, the coming weeks had much potential, and fun was something that Naruto could seriously use right about now.

The stress of the past few days was really wearing on him, even though he didn't outwardly show it. The mere thought of Haku's return made Naruto's stomach turn, and until he found Orochimaru, there wasn't much he could do about it. The blonde sighed and took a leisurely pace as he hopped from roof to roof, he eventually arrived at his old apartment complex, landing in an alleyway on the side of the building. Walking up the side of the building to his old window, he slid it open, jumping into his bedroom.

Naruto landed on the bed, the mattress was completely stripped, with not even a bedsheet left on top of it. The jinchuuriki leapt from the bed and did a front flip out the open door and bounced off of the wall in his hallway, rebounding down the stairs to land on his feet. He energetically swung open all of the cupboards, and to Naruto's relief, his butlers and maids opted to leave his instant ramen alone, he grabbed two packs and filled them with water from the faucet, he then poured the spices in and threw them into the ratty microwave he was overcharged for when he was in the academy.

It was here that Naruto finally took a moment to reflect on the past week and a half, he sat down at the ratty kitchen table, in his favorite ratty chair and hit the replay button in his mind.

The first person he spoken to when he'd originally returned was Ino. Looking back, Naruto realized that she might have been interested in him for quite a while, not only since he's returned, but potentially years before that. He thought back to his days as a genin and remembered the time she showed a sudden increase in interest when interacting with him. Sure, she was still smitten with Sasuke at the time, but Naruto could tell that he was no longer invisible to her while he was standing next to the Uchiha boy. If he could point to an exact moment in hindsight, he'd say that Ino started to become a fixture in his life after he beat Neji during the chuunin exams. Maybe it was fatigue, or maybe his own naiveté, but since hindsight is 20/20, it only made sense that he'd be noticing it now.

* * *

**_~2.5 Years Ago; Chuunin Exams: Post-match: (Naruto vs. Neji)_**

_Naruto had collapsed from exhaustion immediately after he'd KO'd Neji in their match, he woke up in the arena infirmary area, his vision was somewhat blurry, but he was able to make out a pair of hands going over his various injuries, including his broken right arm, which he could tell was now in a cast. Naruto would forever regret punching Neji's Kaiten while moving at full speed, it felt like every bit of power he'd put into his punch was focused directly back into his fist and up into his shoulder, it was still throbbing in pain from the impact._

_Naruto could feel an intense heat in his right arm, he could tell that the demonic chakra was setting and repairing the cracked bones. From his estimate, Naruto figured he be back to 100% in just a couple of days._

_The boy sat up, startling the nurse, she jumped backward when they made eye contact._

_Naruto continued giving her a blank stare while he thought back to the fight. He had put on quite the display against the touted genius that was Neji. All of Naruto's tenketsu were blocked within the first few minutes of the fight, however, thanks to the Kyuubi, Naruto was able to use his demonic chakra to unblock his chakra flow. __Judging from the nurse's reaction, she was afraid of him. It made sense to Naruto, since he felt that in hindsight, he had used far too much of the fox's chakra. He drew it to the point in which it formed a fox-like shroud around his body with a tail. Naruto shuddered as he thought about the dead silence in the arena once he began using the Kyuubi's power. He wanted to be acknowledged by the village, not feared, but that stunt set him way back in that regard._

_Naruto was snapped from his thoughts when the nurse finally spoke again._

"_Naruto… Uzumaki? …"_

_The blonde stared at the nurse expectantly, she continued._

"_I'm going to finish your stitches… if that's okay with you."_

_Naruto remained blank in the face and offered her his hand for her to finish. She nervously crossed the room and sat back down on her chair to grab Naruto's hand._

_The jinchuuriki stared at his lap with a mixed expression; this was the last way he'd expected for his match to turn out, he began to wonder if his newly found friends would still be there for him if they knew what he was..._

_He'd been with his thoughts for a few minutes until there was the sound of a curtain slowly opening. The first thing Naruto saw were a concerned pair of green eyes… then a set of aqua blue ones._

"_Sakura-chan? …and… Ino?"_

_The nurse stood up from her stool and stepped out so that she could give them some privacy._

_Naruto sheepishly looked back and forth between the girls and his hands, visibly nervous, he spoke in a weak tone of voice._

"_I… There's some things about me that I prefer not to talk about with other people... Take what you want from it, but I want you to know that I'll respect your decision if you don't wanna be seen in public with me anymore. I'm… different from most people in some very important ways, it's only natural."_

_Sakura just stood there wide-eyed while Ino gave Naruto a strange look. There was a long pause until Ino spoke up, causing Naruto to stop hanging his head and look in her direction._

"_What're you talking about Naruto?! That was AMAZING! Someone needed to knock that prick down a couple of notches, and the fact that it was you who did it makes it even more awesomely ironic! __"The Pariah beats the Prodigy"__, people will be talking about this for years! The journalists in the audience scrambled out as soon as your fight ended!"_

_Naruto looked at Ino with a dumbfounded expression, as did Sakura (who's wide-eyed stare turned into a smug grin)._

"_Be careful Piggy-chan… Someone might get the wrong idea here; you seem __**awfully**__ impressed with Naruto here."_

_Ino rolled her eyes in response. "What? Are you __**not**__? "_

_Sakura jabbed Ino's shoulder and turned to Naruto. "Of course I am! Naruto, you just pulled off the biggest upset in the history of the Chuunin Exams, you deserve every ounce of praise that comes your way."_

_Naruto smiled, and stared down at his hands. "Thanks for not running away or anything, people seem pretty scared of me now."_

_Sakura and Ino's smiles slowly disappeared when Naruto spoke, Sakura's expression became especially grim, likely thinking back to the mission on the Great Naruto Bridge._

Naruto scratched his head and grinned. "_I'm not all that used to people congratulating me... But thank you."_

_Sakura faked a smile, but continued to stare off to the side, her mind was quite obviously elsewhere. Ino just stared at Naruto for a few seconds before speaking._

"_Hey, Naruto... do you wanna sit with us when you're released?"_

_Naruto looked up, slightly surprised at Ino's compassion. "Really? Sure!"_

* * *

The smell of ramen ushered Naruto out of his reminiscence, he grabbed the two cups and a pair of chopsticks from a paper cup on his counter, and began to immediately stuff his face.

He wondered for a moment, how he'd gone from being nearly universally hated, feared, or ignored, to being completely polarizing since he'd returned. Naruto had been observing the reactions toward him ever since he'd returned from his training trip with Ero-Sannin, and he could never seem to find people who were truly indifferent toward him at this point. He'd figured his striking resemblance to his late father had a lot to do with the rapid shift in public opinion concerning him. Naruto could even remember a few people approaching him specifically to apologize for one reason or another, their reasons could have been genuine, or they could have been self-serving, he didn't particularly care at this point.

Naruto's mind drifted to the girls in his life, with things progressing so quickly he was beginning to have trouble keeping up, just then, and idea began to formulate in his mind. He tossed the empty cups of ramen into the garbage bin and walked back up the stairs to his room.

Once he was inside, he went over to his dresser and opened the top drawer, he pulled out a marker and turned to the wall on the far side of his old room. Naruto walked over to the wall and began writing the girl's names, one by one, his mind spinning with possibilities concerning the many different paths his life could take based on the decisions he chooses to make.

The jinchuuriki suddenly froze before he could finish writing the names on the wall. In spite of all of his swirling thoughts, Naruto was able to sense the fact that he was not alone. Before he could even begin deducing who could be watching him, the fox interrupted the boy's train of thought.

'_**It's the little one… Now's your chance.'**_

Naruto ignored the Kyuubi's kernel of advice and turned his head to the window, speaking in his usual tone of voice.

"Hanabi-chan. You don't have to sit out there all night if you don't want to."

There was a short silence, and then the window made a tiny creaking sound before sliding open. The 9-year-old stepped through and made eye contact with the blonde. Her eyes darted toward the wall for a moment and back to his. For that fraction of a second that she looked at the list, Naruto could see her blank expression flip to a glare and back.

Naruto looked toward the wall as well; she'd interrupted him before he put the final name on the list, _hers_. He felt a pang of guilt decided to try and salvage the situation as best he could.

The young girl spoke first. "Salutations, Uzumaki-san… I suppose it would be courteous to lend you my assistance in creating a proper tallying system…"

Naruto stared back and the big-eyed girl, visibly surprised. "You'd really help me with this?"

She nodded, prompting Naruto to smile a little bit. He motioned Hanabi over to him, she pressed her fingers together a few times before apprehensively crossing the cramped room. When she was next to him, they both turned and stared at the wall while Naruto spoke.

"I'm still reeling from everything that's been happening lately, and while I understand that people can care about me as more than a son or a little brother now, I'm just not used to it… I spent more than 90% of my life wondering if I'd ever find love, and... I eventually did…"

Naruto was emitting a notion of somberness that Hanabi had never seen from the blonde ninja.

"Love… It was taken from me just as quickly as I found it, and I stumbled around, almost completely blind for nearly three years… Now, here I am, with more love than I know what to do with."

Hanabi's eyes went from the wall, to her feet, and then upward toward Naruto's face; he appeared sad, yet hopeful.

The blonde continued. "It's one of the few things I want out of life to be honest... Love, I mean… Hey, Hanabi-chan?"

The young girl replied in her usual neutral tone. "Yes, Uzumaki-san?"

"You're a lot more mature than you let on… you ever thought about what you want out of life?"

Hanabi looked down for a moment, deep in thought. What came out of her mouth next, was insightful, far beyond the standard emotional capabilities of most others within Hanabi's age group.

"… Since I was a toddler, I could remember being groomed to be the heir of the Hyuuga Clan… It was not until recently that my father re-bestowed that birthright upon my sister. After which, I began searching for something else to aspire to, so I poured myself into my training… it gave me _something**,**_ but it was never quite enough. In life, I have realized that my deepest desire is; to find some form of purpose that I can truly invest myself into with every fiber of my being… Everything I have been doing until now feels inconsequential to me... So when you made such a profound change in my sister… It made me wonder about you... and if you could do the same for me…"

Hanabi grabbed Naruto's hand and looked up at him; she had a slight pout on her face as she prepared to address him. There was a notable sternness in her voice that Naruto was unaccustomed to hearing.

"So, to answer your question… Yes, I do think about these things on a regular basis, I just wonder if… _you take me seriously_."

Naruto was taken aback by the weighty nature of the young girl's words; he broke eye contact and looked at the wall for a few seconds. Hanabi could see the gears turning inside of Naruto's head as she waited for him to answer.

The blonde smirked and knelt down, turning to face Hanabi. He produced the marker from his sleeve and handed it to her, the girl sheepishly took it from him and her big lavender eyes bounced between the blonde's face and the marker in her hand. Hanabi's brain began formulating potential outcomes to the situation, but given the circumstances, she just decided to be up front.

"Uzumaki-san, what exactly are y-…"

Hanabi trailed off when Naruto grinned and picked her up by the waist.

The former Hyuuga Heiress inhaled sharply and gave an uncharacteristic squeak at the sudden feeling of weightlessness. Naruto placed her on his shoulder so that she could reach the top spot on the end of the wall. If it weren't for her stoic disposition, Hanabi probably would have giggled as well. Naruto was smiling, though it was decidedly not his patented grin, this smile was subtle in nature. Hanabi looked at him from her perch on his shoulder and she could tell that there was a rare sort of earthliness to him that contrasted his usually outlandish expressions. She began to wonder what exactly was going on inside his head, since this was a side of Naruto she'd never seen before.

Naruto spoke to her in an even tone. "As you can see, I left enough space for _one more name_… _So, to answer __**your**__ question… Yes, _I _do_ take you seriously, Hanabi-chan."

Hanabi, despite maintaining a rather mild expression of surprise, went from a modest pink to a bright red, much in the vein of her sister. Hanabi could have sworn her heart skipped a beat when Naruto lifted her onto his shoulder, and now, she was beginning to feel lightheaded. Naruto and sincerity were attached at the hip, and it was here that she was beginning to truly comprehend why she had such an intense _'gut feeling' _concerning the village pariah.

Hanabi smiled, looking down to her toes as they dangled in space, she then looked dow to Naruto, there was a warm tint to her usually cold and calculated speech patterns.

"… I suppose this is why I find you so… interesting, Uzumaki-san. Those whom you come into contact with, find something within themselves that they were previously unaware of, and as such, they always change for the better. Perhaps..."

Hanabi cut herself off and decided to just enjoy the moment for what it was, she put her ever-elusive smile on display as she proudly signed her own name on the wall in much neater handwriting than Naruto's to the left. It was a profound moment of mutual understanding that both of them had only occasionally felt during their short lives, he placed the girl back on the ground and she turned to him with a tiny smile on her face.

"Uzumaki-san… Arigato." The young girl scuttled over to him and wrapped him up in a surprisingly firm hug. She let go after what felt like a silent eternity, and then, bowed. The unexpected reaction caused Naruto's eyes to widen slightly, seeing as he rarely saw such a thing from any Hyuuga aside from Hinata."

The boy smiled and replied in an unusually humble tone of voice.

"Anytime_, _Hanabi-chan."

* * *

AN: _The feels... they are strong with this one..._ Anyway, thanks for sticking around this far! Chapter 39 will be a bit longer than usual, since there's a lot for me to cover, especially Mitsuki's family reunion (oh, that's gonna be fun to write.)

Now then, Naruto's list will be playing a very important role from now on, and seeing as Hanabi will have a deep understanding of how it works, she's going to be able to pull some strings and make the puppets do a little dance whenever she feels it's necessary (I've got some funny omakes that I wrote a while back that I'd like to actually fold into the story over time, you'll see why soon enough).

Alright then, It's time to begin work on Prologue Orange Chapter 2.

_**UPDATE 8/21/16:**** I'VE JUST POSTED A VERY SPECIAL POLL ON MY PROFILE PAGE. TAKE A LOOK, VOTE, AND POTENTIALLY LOSE SOME OF YOUR HAIR DUE TO STRESS.**_


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